AN: This is still Madison's friend. I'm truly sorry it's been so long. 2022 was a horrific year for my parents & I. Especially the latter part. I won't bore you with the details. I know you just want updates. I'm sorry I've been away. i will try to update once a week at least.

Chpt. 41 APOV:

I wake up to the sun shining brightly against my face and feeling very very warm but also feeling well rested. Looking around the room, I immediately realize that I'm in Christian's bed and the reason I'm so hot is that Christian's body is pressed against my back, his arm wrapped around my waist. I can only assume I fell asleep when Christian and I were talking, the last thing I remember is Christian discussing a local company he was finalizing the purchase of and my eyes feeling very heavy. Glancing at the clock on Christian's nightstand, I'm shocked to see that it is almost ten and that we've been sleeping for probably well over 12 hours. I can't remember the last time I slept so late or woke feeling so rested; I don't know why I'm surprised I've always slept soundly with Christian.

"Where are you going?" Christian mumbles into my ear.

"Bathroom," I giggle.

"Hurry back," he requests.

I use the bathroom and when washing up realize that all of my toiletries are still in Christian's bathroom. I don't know what I expected but I was afraid he might have moved my stuff out of his room, although I can't say I would blame him if he did.

"I can't believe it's so late!" Christian exclaims as I walk back into the room.

"Me either, I hope you didn't have anything planned this morning," I laugh.

"No, I didn't," he says.

I sit on the bed next to him and immediately he wraps an arm around my back pulling me close to him. We just sit there for several minutes, neither of us wanting to address the elephant in the room of what all of this means to us. Do I go back to my apartment this morning? Do I stay here? Does Christian want me to stay here?

"I wasn't sure if you would want me to undress you last night," Christian says gesturing to my work clothes that I'm still wearing.

"It's fine, I'm sorry I fell asleep while we were talking last night," I smile.

"We were both tired," he agrees. "Would you like some breakfast? Gail is off for the weekend but I'm sure she left something in the fridge."

"I can help if you give me a few minutes to shower," I say.

"Sure, I will wait for your downstairs," he replies.

After a long hot shower, I step into Christian's walk in closet to find all of my clothes exactly how I left them. I don't know that I expected him to move them but I guess deep down that was my fear. I think it would have said a lot had he moved my clothes and items from the bathroom. Of course as soon as I put on my clothes I immediately sense we have a problem and instead of opting for a nice pair of jeans I have no choice but to put on a pair of yoga pants and a t shirt seeing as though my jeans no longer fit. Over the last week I've found that most of my work clothes aren't fitting and had to purchase several pairs of pants in larger sizes to fit. I'm not quite ready for maternity clothes but I needed something to get me through until I am so the personal shopper who Christian used previously had suggested a size larger until I was ready to transition to maternity clothes which will probably be in a few weeks.

"I hope we're not going anywhere today," I say walking into the kitchen.

"Why? Is something wrong?" Christian asks.

"My pants here don't fit," I frown. "I can run to my apartment if I need a pair of jeans if you wanted to go somewhere…"

"No!" he answers quickly, "I can have clothes delivered for you, let me call-"

"Christian, I already purchased clothes that fit me now but they're downstairs in my apartment," I take the phone from his hand. "You don't need to call anyone, if you want to go somewhere I can run downstairs and grab a pair of jeans on our way out."

"Let's just stay in," he smiles but I can see his mind is elsewhere.

We spend the day together, catching up on everything that has happened over the last few weeks and watching movies while cuddling on the couch. As the night comes to an end, we still haven't discussed our sleeping arrangements for tonight or really going forward. I don't know if I should assume that he wants me to stay here or if I should offer to return to my apartment. I want nothing more than to spend the night in his bed, in his arms again but I don't know if he feels the same way. Dr. Flynn said we need to communicate with each other but I can't help but worry about Christian's reaction. Will he think we are rushing back into things? Does he want me to sleep here again?

"Even though we slept so late this morning I'm still exhausted," he yawns loudly.

"Me too," I smile.

"Do you want to…to come to bed with me? You don't have to…." he stutters.

"I would like that," I take his hand as he leads me upstairs.

We walk past the closed door that once was the playroom; as much as I want to see what it looks like now I don't know that I'm ready for that. I know the moment I open that door, my mind will immediately go back to what the playroom used to look like and everything that we have experienced in there. I think I need some more time before we open that door; luckily Christian senses my need and continues to lead me down the hallway into his bedroom. I use the bathroom first, quickly washing up and changing out of my clothes. I'm desperate to try to get things back to normal between us; at least a new normal anyway. I've missed the connection that I feel to Christian when we are together; I've missed everything about him over the last few weeks especially what we share in the bedroom. I pull on the silk robe that was hanging on the door, stepping out just as Christian steps into the bathroom to get ready. Taking a deep breath I walk over to what has always been my side of the bed, drop the robe and climb into bed. Christian emerges from the bathroom a few minutes later in his boxers and a t shirt, turns off the light and climbs into bed.

"Ana…." He gasps as his hand wraps around my waist to pull my closer.

"Hmmmm?" I ask.

"Where are your pajamas?" He mumbles.

"I thought you preferred me to sleep without any?" I smile shyly at him.

"Uh…I do…but…." He stutters

"Christian, I've missed you so much over the last few weeks," I slowly move myself closer to him, his arm still rests on my waist not moving. "I've missed this; I've missed sleeping with your arms around me; I've missed us. Make love to me Christian…please?"

"Ana….are you sure? This can wait if you're not ready-" he asks.

"Christian…I've missed you and how I feel when we're together, I want that back," I admit.

"God I've missed you so much Ana, you have no idea how much," he whispers in my ear pulling me closer to him so I can feel just how much he missed me. "If you want to stop or if something bothers you-"

"I'll be fine Christian," I roll over so we are face to face and immediately I see worry, fear, hesitation but most of all love in his eyes.

"I can't believe how much your body has changed…you are so beautiful," he moans rubbing his hands up and down me.

"Christian," I whimper as his fingers tease my clit causing my body to immediately respond.

"I'm not going to last long…it's been too long since I've been inside of you," he warns.

"I need you," I grasp his hard erection tightly, coating it with the pre cum juices from the tip.

"Oh God," he urges me to roll onto my back as he quickly moves above me.

He rubs his erection through my folds, I can feel my juices coating him as he leans down capturing my mouth in his.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh," I moan loudly when he finally enters me, stretching me as he pushes himself in deeper.

"You feel so good, God I've missed this," he gently thrusts into me causing me to whimper when he finally enters me completely as my body quickly adjusts to accommodate him.

"Christian….I….Ohhhhhhhhhhh!" He starts moving within me, never fully pulling out but each time hitting my g spot perfectly. My hands grip his ass pulling me deeper into me with each thrust; his tongue thrusts into my mouth mimicking the act on my sex.

"Oh God…don't stop…so close," I mumble as the need quickly becomes too much. The time apart from Christian has been hell but in this moment, in this physical act, I can feel our connection is just as strong as it was before everything happened.

"Ana…." He moans as I feel him swell deep inside of me. "Come with me Ana!"

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh! CHRISTIAN!" I scream as the orgasm finally hits when Christian thrusts hard and deep into me before yelling my name and finding his own release. He rolls us onto our sides and holds me close against him as we both try to get our breathing back under control.

"Wow," I sigh as I come down from the orgasm.

"I'm sorry," he pants.

"Sorry?" I ask confused.

"That it was so quick; I've missed you so much…I couldn't hold back any longer; God I almost came the moment I entered you," he sighs.

"Trust me, I'm not complaining," I giggle. "I've missed you so much; I've missed this."

"Will you move back in with me?" Christian asks after a few moments of silence. "If you want space, you can stay in one of the guest rooms-or wherever you want. I can't stand the thought of you sleeping anywhere else but in my bed, but if you need to I have plenty of guest rooms you can have-"

"Yes," I whisper.

"I just need to have you near me, to know – wait," he stops for a moment. "Did you say yes?"

"Yes, Christian, I'll move back in with you," I smile kissing him. "I don't want to sleep anywhere else than right here in your arms. I promise, I'm not going anywhere."

"You don't know how happy you just made me," he kissed me deeply.

Christian falls asleep moments later, with my head resting on his arm and the other wrapped around my waist holding me tight against him. In this moment it's so easy to forget everything that happened almost a month ago, to forget the nightmare that was my life for those many hours and to forget that we were ever apart for those weeks. I wish we could simply push this aside and let it stay in the past but I know that isn't an option for us or for me. I'm thankful that Christian is so supportive of me and of our relationship, the fact that he dismantled the playroom before I was even home surprises me still. I was so concerned that he wouldn't want a relationship without BDSM or that I would be forcing him to give up something he didn't want to give up that I didn't think it would be something he would want to give up. I didn't know that bastard sent him pictures and videos of me while he held me; knowing that now I understand why Christian says he couldn't go back into the playroom either.

I fall asleep shortly after Christian and once again sleep soundly, wrapped in Christian's protective arms. I wake a few hours later, the room is pitch dark; I can't see the alarm clock but given how dark it is I can tell it's still pretty late. I gasp slightly when Christian twitches inside of me, realizing that we fell asleep with him still inside of me. I try to move slowly disentangle myself from Christian, but his arm is wrapped around me tightly holding me close to him. He must sense my movements as the arm that is around my waist pulls me closer to him which slides me further down his erection. I can feel him getting harder inside of me, which is a very strange yet arousing feeling. Christian's arm tightens around my waist, pulling me closer to him just as he gently rocks his hips upwards until he is fully hard inside of me. I gasp at the sudden full feeling; Christian's lips immediately find mine as he holds me tight against him. My body begins responding to his movements as I lose myself in his kiss, my hands exploring his body pulling him closer to me as the need increases.

"I could get used to waking up like this," he moans as he thrusts harder into me.

"Hmmmmmmmm," I moan as he adjusts the angle so he hits my clit every time he thrusts into me.

Our hands are everywhere, holding each other closer as our bodies move together. I move my leg, resting it on his hip, desperately trying to get closer to him as the need begins to take over. The combination of sensations is beginning to overwhelm me yet the orgasm remains just out of reach.

"Oh God….Christian….I'm so close…." I beg.

"You feel so good baby, you grip me so tight when you are about to come," he moans, gripping my ass tighter thrusting me up and down against him.

"Yes! Don't stop!" I yell as the orgasm finally comes within reach at his new pace.

"Come for me baby," he gently rubs his fingers just against my anus which immediately pushes me over the edge and I scream his name as the orgasm finally hits. He wraps his arms around me tightly as he just rocks gently in and out of me prolonging my orgasm even more. He slowly rolls onto his back, taking me with him as he urges me to sit up allowing him to slide deeper into me.

"You are so beautiful," he whispers as his hands run up and down the front of my body before they rest on the small bump just above our connection.

"Christian," I moan as he thrusts into me further.

"Ride me baby, I love watching you like this," he instructs.

I blush but slowly begin moving against him, placing my hands on his chest for support I move up so just his head sits inside of me before thrusting down forcefully, taking him in completely.

"Again," he grunts. "Don't stop."

His words fuel my confidence, knowing that he is enjoying this act turns me on even more as I begin moving faster against him each time withdrawing just to the tip before thrusting down on him again. His moans are becoming louder as his hands grip my hips tightly; within minutes my moans are matching his as the need quickly builds once again.

"Don't stop…you feel so good…." He whispers.

"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHH CHRISTIAN!" I scream in pleasure moments later when he pinches my nipple which is just what I need to send me over the edge. His hands quickly fall back to my hips, taking over the movements for me when the sensations become so overwhelming that I can't coordinate my own movements.

"ANA! OH GOD!" He screams as he thrusts me down hard on him just as he finds his own release deep inside of me.

He wraps his arms around me, pulling me close to him so I am resting on his chest as we try to come back to reality. I listen to his heartbeat slowly returning to a normal pace as his hands move up and down my back relaxing me while holding me against him.

"That was….wow…." I whisper.

"I think I made up for the quickie earlier," he smiles.

"That you did," I giggle.

After a quick wash up in the bathroom, we are back in bed wrapped in each other's arms and quickly fall asleep once again. The next few days pass by quickly; Christian and I are as close as were before everything happened maybe even closer. We have been talking a lot more than we did before, both of us trying to follow Dr. Flynn's advice on communicating with each other. I continue to see Dr. Flynn but my sessions have been reduced to only once a week as opposed to the three times a week they were after the first incident. Ever since our joint session with Dr. Flynn, I feel much less anxious about my relationship with Christian. After discovering that we are both on the same page, the other pieces just seemed to fall into place.

"It's looking like I have to fly back to New York next week," I announce over dinner.

"What? Why? Is it safe for you to be flying?" he asks concerned.

"I spoke with Dr. Greene this morning and I can fly safely as long as I walk around and stretch my legs during the flight since it's a longer flight. When I'm closer to my due date she recommends that I don't fly," I explain.

"What's in New York?" he asks.

"There's an author that I worked with previously who ended up going with another publishing house for his last book since he wasn't sure how things would work once we moved to Seattle. Now he is unhappy with that publishing house and wants to sign with SIP," I explain.

"Why can't he come here to meet with you?" he asks.

"He has a fear of flying and refuses to get on a plane," I laugh. "I told him I was only flying out this time to meet with him, after this if he decides he wants to sign with SIP then he either comes to Seattle or at least video conference with the editor who will be assigned to him should he decide to sign with us."

"You can take the GEH jet, this way you have plenty of space to walk around when you need to. Of course Sawyer will accompany you," Christian begins to ramble as he plans everything. "I have an apartment in New York you could stay at, the security is not as high as Escala but it's better than a hotel. Maybe I should update the security system there before you go-"

"Christian," I interrupt him laughing. "You do not need to update the security system for me. Relax, everything will be fine – I'm sure Sawyer will provide adequate security."

"I don't know…maybe you should take Taylor instead," he suggests.

"Whatever you think is best," I sigh.

"Christian darling…." I hear Grace's voice come from the foyer.

"In the dining room Mother," Christian calls.

"I haven't heard from you in a few days, I wanted to check on you – Oh!" she says walking into the room and seeing me. By the surprise in her eyes, I can only assume that she wasn't expecting me to be here. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize you had company."

"Please, join us for desert Grace," I smile hugging her just as Gail brings a warm chocolate cake to the table.

"No, I don't want to intrude," she says.

"Please, sit down," Christian says.

"Ana, you look wonderful darling," she compliments a few moments later.

"Thank you," I smile.

"Mom, Ana moved in with me a couple days ago – I meant to call," Christian says guiltily.

"Nonsense, that's wonderful news! I'm so glad you two were able to work everything out," her eyes truly reflect how happy she is for us.

"Thank you," I blush.

"I was stopping by to see if you were both coming to Thanksgiving dinner next week?" she asks.

"I don't see why not, Ana?" Christian asks.

"Sounds good, let us know what we can bring," I agree.

"Just bring yourselves; no need to bring anything else. I have to be going now, I'm due at the hospital shortly. Have a wonderful night," she says quickly leaving the room.

"I feel so bad that I haven't called her and told her about you moving in," Christian says as soon as we hear the elevator doors close.

"It has only been a couple of days," I point out.

"True," he sighs. "I still feel bad that I didn't call her and tell her."

"We've been a little busy," I smirk. We spent the weekend and every day this week reconnecting with each other; I have found that my sex drive is higher than ever right now. I'm not sure if it's because of the pregnancy as Dr. Greene did say that was a possibility or if it's because of the new connection that I have with Christian. Since everything that happened, our time apart and then our session with Dr. Flynn Christian and I have become closer than ever before.

"Do you have to go to New York?" He sulks as we get ready for bed.

"Unfortunately, but this should be my only trip out there," I say.

"When are you leaving?" he asks.

"Monday and I will be home Wednesday afternoon," I explain. "It pretty much kills my week since Thanksgiving is Thursday and our offices are closed Friday but if it means signing this author I'll deal with it. He has such potential in his writing, he just needs a little more hand holding than most established authors out there but I think he will be worth it."

"You seem to have a good eye for authors seeing as you've had a few best sellers since you took over SIP," he compliments.

"I have a pretty strong team of editors which made each book possible," I admit.