Eyes that see into Infinity
Part 2
Chapter Twenty Five
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The aged Mieza sky comes glooming in the shadows, sneaking up on the small companions preparing them for another day of rain, apart from the dazzling golden sun balancing bold above their heads.
Is the mind a trick master? Little and curious Philotas asks with a risen hand eager to learn.
It is a bit of an unsettled day for the boys to be outside listening to Aristotle preaching yet another lecture. But they carry on, continuing to pay attention to more of the valuable lessons their old and wise teacher has to offer in order to prepare themselves for future times.
The mind is not a trick Philotas. Only it becomes one if you allow such things to cloud such wisdom. The old man speaks gently instructing the response to all of his students. Then if the mind is weak enough, my boys, it becomes a cosigned place to trap dangerous competition. That competition being within yourself.
They are wrapped in heavy fur cloaks, keeping their little bodies covered incase white water droplets fly down from the majestic heavens. They have the sniffles as the cold breeze hits them quietly. But like always even the craziest of weather couldn't hide any fascinations held on the prince's face as the blonde haired pupil gazes upon his instructor.
What about when one is tempted master? Cassander asks over, eyes lit in absorption as the gifted sun brightens them up. Is that a trick you speak of?
The prince allows the intensity of his focus stray away from his parchment and at the mean-eyed boy with a sudden interest at the question. What if one is tempted? He asks himself because he's been finding himself fighting temptation every second of his life.
Aristotle chuckles unthinkingly and with a small nod he lifts his attention towards the precious learners. His intelligent eyes scanning each and single one of them. Yes. It's only one of the few tricks, yet it is the trickiest of them all. It can lead to discomfort within ones own conscious. Beware of it. He warns.
Is that why it's so easy? Cassy replies scathingly and the other boys laugh with him except for the prince.
The old teacher quiets the boys down by speaking over their cheer of amusement. Temptation is easy Cassander, you're absolutely right. It is exactly like the trick Philotas was talking about. But it isn't necessarily a horrible thing to have either. Easy, yes, tricky, yes, manipulative also yes but all these things a human needs sequentially to create an even amount of weight and balance in its authority to the ways of our actions.
Alexander now focuses on his words and listens for the answer.
If your adolescent minds can allow you to think further and deeper about this, temptation is believe it or not, the better side of you. It's the side that wants you to do well but persuades you to do everything you do not hope to. The old teacher smirks slightly and gives a slight wink to Cassander as if they shared a little secret. Or maybe it was a hint into Cassander's own future. It bounds the life you bear in all of its power to prevent you from any type of success whatsoever.
Is that not a contradiction Master? The small prince questions boldly, not being new in the department of asking questions about the things he doesn't understand. And the one quality thing Aristotle found comforting and promising in the young prince was that the boy didn't pretend that he knew anything about everything or anything at all. But he admired greatly that he went out and sought the solutions rather than living with the issue. Alexander was for better words, a thinker, a problem solver. Whatever the problem, he wanted it gone and he wasn't shy of getting the answers to come to some sort of conclusion and resolution. At first I believed that I was the better side, better than my own conscious. I fought it everyday and sometimes I won. But until theses tricks of my mind started to shape even greater I knew how powerful it really was. I began to lose and I'm still losing. And I don't like losing. He confesses openly.
The philosopher stunned raises a thoughtful brow. Even he knew that Alexander was far too young to be battling any of his darker demons this soon.
The perplexed stares of the boys travel from the prince at the teacher wondering with fair stillness how Aristotle would react to such a confession.
Hmm, what are you losing Alexander? Aristotle smirks interested in this darker more open side of the prince.
I don't know yet. The boy answers softly and blinks.
Are you sure you're not mistaking losing for giving up? Aristotle questions again but this time extremely interested in an answer.
The prince stares at the ground instinctively watching the specks of sand and dust being blown away by the tender winds. Then he looks back up at his master. I don't know.
Well is this temptation you are facing fierce? Aristotle asks suddenly.
Fiercer than ever. The prince responds with a bit of a stiffened throat. But its more mocking of me, rather than tempting.
The teacher nods understanding the prince's situation. Temptation is also known for its disdainful advice. And I also know being a good friend to your father, a lot about you. Being your teacher is just an added benefit. But if I were to ask your companions here about the one thing you hate most, they would answer a thing of similarity.
What do I hate most? The keen blonde prince asks in a low voice.
The teacher turns to Nearchus deciding to pick randomly from the group. Ah, Nearchus my boy, what does Alexander here hate most?
He hates to be mocked. The chubby boy answers proudly.
The teacher nods. How about you Cassander? What does young Alexander hate the most?
He doesn't like to be thought so little of. The mean eyed boy retorts looking at the prince with a grin emerging on his face. Alexander timidly looks away proving them all right, his reaction telling Aristotle everything he needed to know and exactly how the boy felt.
Very good. Who else, yes, Ptolemy?
He hates not being in control of everything. He doesn't like that he can't see into the future. The curled haired boy says. He looks at Alexander apologetically and the prince allows a small smile.
That you are right my boy! Aristotle exclaims and turns back to the blonde prince. Your conscious mocks you. It thinks nothing of you and you start to feel like nothing at all and it will keep mocking you until you start to feel empty in the end.
So that's why I ask, how something that calculating and untrustworthy be the better side when it's not our minds but us who suffer the consequences by its result? Sure we have the chance to fight it but what is the point when it always wins? Why do we fight something stronger and more powerful? After all our human bodies are only hosts of our souls so in reality isn't our soul operating our conscious mind? Isn't it the mind always in control when it comes down to our intellect and reason? Doesn't that make the mind only apart of our soul that which it knows and understands? After all it's the mind that sets us apart from the real living world. As far as I'm concerned we don't stand a chance.
The young innocent eyes of the students follow their instructor as the old man leans away from the bolder he was against and approaches Phillip's boy placing a gentle hand on his shoulder. He smiles. You have a gift to see the world differently and your perceptions of my teachings are strong and away but you can win anything you want in life, all you have to do is be willing to take it. I believe you can. You might not think you can control your future but believe me Alexander; you have the strength and willpower to control your own destiny. All of us here believe you have that potential. But perhaps you're fighting your conscious unrightfully.
I know right from wrong Master. Alexander answers fiercely. And the voices in my head are wrong. I'm fighting it fairly.
Aristotle smiles with intent. Then your conscious is going according to plan. Think of it as a lesson young prince, a lesson you shall always remember. A lesson you will be wise yourself to prepare for in your next life to live, as a man and as a king. Because in truth you will struggle most of all.
And what if I never become king? The boy asks, his indifferent eyes destined for greatness. He knows it. As does everyone else. What lesson would there be for me to look forward too?
These lessons will not only come to you when you are king. They will always find you my child. And my advice for you when you undergo this evil persuasion of temptation is to fight, Alexander. Aristotle exclaims. Fight it to the death because that's what it wants. Fight it for love instead of lust. Fight it for freedom instead of imprisonment. Fight for everything your heart stands for. In order to do that you must relax your mind, you must put all desires to sleep, follow your soul and listen to your heart, always. Your mind and will might be grand but the heart is always precise. So Prince, now that we got that out of the way, I ask, what do you fight for?
\
A panther had encountered a lion in the wild. However it was the panther who found itself lurking in the wrong territory. The sound of the fight became thunderous. There was not even a tiny bit distraction at all between the two wrestling boys regardless of the shouting and cheers coming from the overly hyped crowd of teenagers. Alex's only focus was on Cassy and Cassy's only focus was on Alex as the two enemies struck at each other as hard and heavy as their energy level, testosterone and hatred for each other would allow. Alex wasn't showing an ounce of generosity and Cassy wasn't giving up, attacking back with as much ferocity as his attitude.
The two fought as if they fought before. Every move was one of familiarity.
Shouting. Growling. Punching. Grass staining clothes. Hands grabbing at us trying to pull Cassy and I apart. Tolem telling us to stop. The cheerleaders gathering by to see the action. More excitement cultivating. Me hurling Cassy to the ground. More students who just happened to be around stopping in to get a better look. Blood staining our clothes. From cuts and torn skin. Us rolling over each other. Me ending up on top. Me wrapping two hands around his neck. Leon running to grab the coach after realizing it was hopeless. Cassy trying to knock me off as he aims three hard punches to the right of my face. Cleitus with a video camera recording it. Phil and Crater hollering. Cassy lashing me aside. Us both rising. Him wiping his bloody mouth and me wiping the warm blood from the side of my face. Our violent breathing becoming agitated and impatient. Our strings of sweaty hair falling into our eyes.
"Fuck you Alex!"
"No fuck you Cassy!"
"You guys cut it out!" Tolem tried keeping the two apart with the help of Perdicas but Alex knocked Perdicas away and Cassy shoved Tolem, and the two animals went back at it. The constant cheers only ruling them on and encouraging said behavior.
Tolem backed away from the two unmanageable humans thinking over his attempt at stopping them and Perdicas flew up his hands with a 'what the hell' look. It wasn't easy being apart of a group of friends who couldn't stand each other. And he was certain the rest felt the same frustration…Well maybe not Phai because Cassy wasn't Phai's friend and Alex was much more than a friend but either way this was getting out of hand.
Perdicas rolled his eyes. Tolem sighed. Then they turned to Phai wondering about his feelings in all of this. He was so quiet they almost forgot he was even there. They wouldn't have been surprised if he ended up leaving either.
"I take it this isn't what you had in mind today." Tolem asked Phai just because of Phai's look alone. First, Phai couldn't believe how fast this had spiraled. He really didn't see anything coming as far as the fighting went. Second he couldn't believe how many useless people found it so fascinating including their own friends. Third seeing Alex with this new found confidence was not only sexy as hell but it shocked him severely and not in a good way. Also on top of that both Alex and Cassy had some very violent tendencies and anger issues they needed to resolve. Phai knew how Alex was, even before he actually knew him. Alex held in too much anger. Too much anger than he could swallow. And he knew Alex wasn't truly upset with Cassy. He was never angry with anyone but himself and that brought out the worst in him. And even though he knew the source of Alex's anger, he couldn't quite figure out Cassy just yet.
"No. It wasn't." Phai looked preoccupied in thoughts but had his attention on the fight, a part of him acting as if he didn't particularly care even though it was apparent that he did because of the aggravation deepening in his blue gaze. He lifted darkly his eyes at Tolem with a slightly risen brow, motioning with his shoulders that there was nothing he could do about it. When Tolem shook his head in partial acceptance, Phai exhaled impatiently looking back at the two fighting cats.
I wanted to kill him. And all the anger and frustration and anticipation that I felt inside me, I really thought I was. And there was no one who could stop me. There was no one who would even risk their own safety in trying. I was an unstoppable force. I've always had been. I was volatile and impulsive and there was nothing anyone could do about it.
And if anyone was a greater witness to my indiscretion, it was Phai. I saw him from the corner of my eye. He's sad. He's angry. He's confused. He's hurt. He's annoyed. He wants this to end. But there is something sinister in him, where he's frightened and awed but impressed and delighted at the same time. And in spite of not one smile forming on his lips, there is one hidden in his eyes. He feels all of these emotions and it's spoken and articulated in just one single expression. All of it. He's always been a mix of beautiful and vice. Like an angel and demon but with more angel. Could he be anymore brilliant?
Then a sharp pain, shot inside Alex's head out of nowhere when he saw the dim watery blue eyes softly expressing him to stop, and a collection of images surfaced into his mind.
The pain was nothing new to me but through one deep breath my mind traced back from this moment all the way back to my life as a young prince, where the Phai from my past is watching a little Cassander and I wrestle in the dirt. We're wrestling each other out of anger and intemperance because an argument between us had started. Our friends are trying to tear us apart from each other; but we don't allow it. We don't budge for them. No one has any idea what we were skirmishing belligerently about but they didn't need to know. Because he knew. The one watching us with wide feared blue eyes afraid we were going to kill each other.
More and more of our friends gather around worried and desperate telling us to stop, but we keep at it like two wild cats forced to fight to the death and the browned haired boy who we were fighting over folds his arms ashamed at the both of us and looks away, as Aristotle and my father run up prepared to stop the small quarrel.
It took a moment before Alex came back to the present and he could feel his blood starting to boil, and it might have been the cause of the distant echoes that rang and rang and kept ringing in his ears. It could also be because he had no self control infront of Phai who he knew hated it when he was like this.
Phai folded his arms clearly disappointed in the situation and at the way they both decided to handle it. He looked away sighing once more.
Phai once told me that being around me when my moods changed felt surreal. And then he told me that the reason why people took precaution of me was because of what I became, what I changed in to. They were afraid of me. Phai didn't like seeing me like this and I wasn't surprised to see tears smearing on the hand I was striking Cassy with. I didn't like seeing me like this either. And I hated that he had to see it again. This had nothing to do with the rude remark Cassy had made earlier. I punched him so that Cassy knew his place. And now Cassy will learn that I am not that Alex anymore. I was not the innocent boy watching Phai from the pond everyday. I was not the innocent boy too shy to even speak to him. I wasn't the boy that Cassy poked fun at anymore. I wasn't the boy who allowed his father to talk down to him. I wasn't the boy who allowed his mother to coddle him. I wasn't the boy who allowed Roxanne to manipulate me. I wasn't the boy who allowed others to control my destiny. However I was still that boy who watched the beautiful brunette boy everyday at sunset down at the pond. I was the boy who gained enough courage to speak to the brunette at the zoo when I was just in middle school. I was the boy who finally owned his heart. Cassy can hate me all he wants because I didn't care. Phai wasn't impressed by our fighting. He's never been impressed by it. So I stopped. I let my hands release around Cassy's neck and I allow myself to submit. I looked right at Phai and closed my eyes before I let Cassy do whatever he wanted as he took over, fastening me to the ground with all his weight and strength and begins pummeling in my face with heavy strikes. He's furious hitting as hard as he can and I just let him. I refused to fight back and I refused to struggle against him. I just let my body relax as I swallowed my own blood. Letting my mind float somewhere else.
This isn't the worst beating I have received in my life. I have had a lot worse injuries during my years of battle, ones that were even fatal. Infact I was infamous for receiving injuries and proceeding on like the pain never even existed. I could feel the cuts in my mouth opening and tearing because of the constant blows to my jaw. I can feel the side of my face swelling and my vision becoming cloudy. I can feel newly made blood starting to run down my face. I can see the anger, hatred and animosity in Cassy's eyes with every fist he launched at me. Then I started to laugh. For no reason I could think of and the moment the students realized I wasn't going to be fighting back anytime soon and as I lay submissive out of random allowing Cassy to beat the shit out of me, they all rushed in trying to stop him.
So what do I fight for? Let's see, I'm smart, brave, loud, social, charismatic, and fierce, all traits just like a lion but do I fight for that? Do I fight to be liked? Maybe. Maybe I fight for a future I was already planning? In fact all I really wanted was to be greater than my father. But that was before I knew I could make out my future through the soul of another. So did I fight for the world? I knew I could rule the world…but never could I rule my own head. Arrogance was not an option. So did I fight to be loved?
/
The boys are chuckling to one another as they gather back after a long needed break to continue their teachings.
Now class, quiet down. The old professor instructs quieting the boys. We have a new guest who will be joining us in this remarkable lesson today. The old man chuckles lightly to himself and extends his arm welcoming the new boy.
The prince raises his head and his once downcast gaze captures big desolate sapphires. The prince merely stares back finding himself dumbfounded. The new boy blinks and smiles shyly at the other boys but not the prince. He, with a burnt brown head of hair and so beautiful, doesn't bother acknowledging the prince.
His name is Hephaistion. Aristotle introduces allowing the boy to take a seat next to Ptolemy.
From the far right of the gathering grounds Alexander watched him sit. He watched Ptolemy hand him some supplies. And the new boy didn't pay the prince any attention, ignoring the blonde's determination to be acknowledged.
The prince looks at him so that the new boy may look back. But no such luck.
\
Sometimes what is in reality doesn't necessarily mean things are actually real. Yes, the world around me felt real and I thought I could prove it by the blood I tasted as Cassy struck my jaw. I thought if something happened before my very eyes it had to be real because I was a witness to it.
In my young life as a prince I knew the battles my father had fought and the battles I would have fought later on were real. I knew my friends and allies who followed me through hard worn and new grounds were real. I knew that even my death would become real.
I can say this about what's true and what's false because since my birth I've lived inside a myth. In this new life and in my old one. The myth was all around me. Everywhere I went. In my sleep with cold snakes. In my wars with mad men. I've lived around a myth of my mother's lies and loneliness and the myth of my father's extreme dislike for me. The myth of my own companions jealousy of what I have and what I had to offer. The myth of me becoming a god and being the son of one. That was never real. Myths aren't real. Myths are beliefs. Stories. False tales told to the worldview of people so that they can believe in something.
My mother always read me stories but their was one specifically that I remember. She told me of the Greek Legend about a beautiful young lady who was loved by the great Eros, the god of love and passion. Aphrodite, jealous, lasted long in detest until she overcame her depression and that girl became the image of the soul. Whose soul, I still don't know but I relived this tale as a youth when I met my own essence of my other soul.
I've had my share of both good and bad, followed by my favorite myths or myths influenced around me. I believed I could fly when I was just five years old. I believed I could rule the world when I was three. I believed in me and only me and I think the reason for my death would be because of it. I would become a tyrant because of it. My kingdom will collapse because of it. And my world will fall apart because of it. This will all happen at the foot of my death bed but the question is would I care at all or was I just lucky to have had someone in my life?
Leon came running back almost out of breath. "The coach is on his way. I think the principal is too. He is not too happy."
"Seriously?" Tolem asked shocked that he was even surprised about it. Of course the coach would be angry. The two captains of the team weren't playing well together.
"Yea." Leon nodded.
"How mad?" Phai asked.
"I don't know. But I wouldn't be surprised if he suspended them both."
"Hey may I have your attention please! Everyone split, the principal is coming!" Cleitus shouted and once the students heard that, they all ran like a flock of drug dealers running from the police. They were out of there faster than they joined.
Phai rolled his eyes. They could always count on Cleitus to make things much more dramatic.
"Hey you two knock it off. What the hell is going on!" The coach shouted running over to where the two boys were at, the principal of the school only shortly behind him.
Cassy was still fucking Alex up when the coach stormed over blowing his whistle for them to break it up. When Cassy wasn't stopping, the principal clutched his arms around him, pulling him off, while the coach approached and leaned by Alex's side looking over him quickly, not believing they went this far, even though the blonde was just laughing like a maniac with a bloody mouth and face.
"I hope you released all the anger you needed to Cassy." Alex said chuckling deeply while spitting up blood on the grass and while bringing himself to stand.
"What the hell do you guys think you're doing huh? You know this is absolutely inappropriate and prohibited on the school grounds!" The coach yelled strictly.
Since none of them were answering clearly to worked up to even speak, the coach turned looking at Tolem, Phai, Leon and the rest of the friends who were the only ones left at the scene. "Well, what happened?"
"We got into a confrontation. That's what fucking happened." Cassy answered while holding his side that was throbbing vigorously.
"No shit you smartass. What the hell could you two be fighting about this time?" The coach made himself clearer looking at both demanding a legitimate answer.
"Nothing." Alex answered.
"You call this bleeding all over the place nothing?" The principal couldn't believe it.
"Yea." The blonde grew a disturbed grin. "It was nothing."
Phai rolled his eyes and spoke up for the both of them. "It's always been about one thing. It's about this two captain thing. They don't like it. They want just one."
The coach looked at Phai and then back at the other two disbelievingly. "Is this what this is about. You guys are fighting over who gets to be captain? You know what you guys do not have a say in that. I'm in charge here!"
"You're in charge huh? Does sitting at your desk all day make you in charge or am I missing something?" Alex said while spewing out more blood on the grass.
"Don't give me that Alex. Whatever you and Cassy have going on is not allowed on school grounds period, is that understood!?"
"Yes sir." Alex reluctantly replied.
"That's what I thought. You have been slipping Alex and not to mention you guys will all be graduates this year, hopefully. And Cassy, wherever you are there is trouble and whatever you're causing has got to stop! Do you understand me?"
"Yes sir." Cassy also reluctantly replied.
"Now both of you are lucky that you're good students. And you're damn well lucky I like you guys. But if this ever happens again, you will be suspended from the school for good. No more chances. Am I making myself clear?" The principal mediated.
"Yes sir." They both replied
"Now who started this?"
Alex rose his hand saving Cassy the trouble. "I did."
"That's a three day suspension for you Alex. It would have been a week but I'm feeling a bit generous since you've already earned yourself one."
"How kind." Alex sarcastically answered as his tongue danced around the inside of his mouth playing with the open cuts, surprised he didn't have any broken teeth or a fractured jaw.
The principal looked at his watch, sighing. "We have about an hour and a half left until school is over. I need the both of you to go clean up now and get medical attention immediately. Then Alex come stop by my office. You and I have a lot to talk about."
Alex laughed at that like suggesting such a thing was absurd. "Another day. It can wait. I will meet you in your office when I come back in three days." The blonde took off to go do his fifteen morning laps around the school, that the team didn't get a chance to get too because of the obvious quarrel.
"What the hell is he doing?" The coach asked angrily and the other boys just shrugged.
Alex decided to ignore the 'medical attention' part despite having blood running down the side of his face and ear, his bottom lip split down the middle, and his left eye closing on him, while turning a multitude of colors because of swelling. His right eye was just fine but he was sure the after effects hadn't shown up yet. Cassy was bleeding from his mouth, with two busted lips, the area around his ribs all bruised greenish purple, his normal skin barely noticeable, two black eyes with minor cuts all over his body. In other words he was in worse shape then Alex despite Alex refusing to fight back in that last half. They were lucky to even have an infirmary at the school. The amount of fights at that school was very high.
The coach sighed and the principal shook his head with an agitated huff, as they watched the teen turn his back and proceed to walk away. The blonde at times was far more frustrating than Cassy which was surprising because Alex was a great student. He was smart, he was determined, passionate and Cassy was the opposite. He was smart but he slacked off, with no motivation to do anything. But what it came down to was that both of them clashed because they were both strong in personality and opposite in qualities. The principal looked to the others boys. "As for everyone else, you will stay for the rest of practice and someone go get Alex for me before he kills himself. Leon you're in charge for the rest of practice. You boys need to be on your best game."
Leon just nodded. Cassy and Phil left heading back towards the doors of the school and the rest of the friends were just looking at each other trying to figure out in their heads who would be best to go get Alex.
"I'm not going." Perdicas decided to just go ahead and say it.
"It's a suicide mission." Crater proclaimed.
"Well I can't go anyway because I was put in charge." Leon shrugged.
"Are you guys serious right now?" Tolem responded. "You are a bunch of pansies."
"Whatever, you try getting Alex, we'll see how well that works for you."
"You guys are pathetic." Phai said grabbing his backpack and heading off in the direction Alex left.
Alex was jogging slightly stumblingly along the path of the school before he reacted quickly to a coughing attack. He stopped and grabbed on to the metal fences available to him as he coughed until blood accumulated from his insides, and then he spat the nasty liquid on the concrete of the sidewalk. He wiped his mouth with his shirt and immediately after, began to cough more, this time puking. It had to do with Cassy punching him too many times in the stomach, all the food he had for breakfast and part of his sickness he has been fighting for so long. All of it made for a real bad day and a real bad feeling. He still felt he was undergoing over and over the beating he was given just minutes ago.
The cheerleaders running their laps passed by the blonde looking with grossed out faces, some even laughing about it. Roxanne was running with them and she and Alex spotted each other and they only shared a quick glance before looking away, Roxanne grinning halfheartedly like he deserved it and Alex just rolling his eyes before pulling away from the fence with any strength left and continuing his laps as if nothing was wrong.
Even though he started out jogging, he found that he slowly graduated into walking when he himself was thinking he was crazy for doing this with possible broken body parts. What the hell was he thinking. The heat of the sun wasn't helping either. It was just making him more nauseated.
He hunched over coughing some more, while holding a hand at his rib cage. His lungs felt out of breath like they were collapsing on him and the air struggled to enter and leave his body. Phai came up beside Alex, not saying a word but just being there for him. The blonde smiled under his stringy sweaty hair knowing that it was Phai by his side, and he straitened up and looked at his friend. They both continued to walk next to each other smiling, in Alex's case trying to smile because of the cuts and bruising, and that's all they shared.
As they walked and as Alex forced himself to keep going he would stop and throw up a couple of times. Phai was patient with him. He wasn't even going to bother trying to get Alex to head back to the school. The blonde was far too stubborn to do that, far too determined to prove everyone wrong and even more prideful to admit something was wrong. And though he was in pretty bad shape, he still managed to jog two laps and walk one.
Alex finally gave up and sat down on the edge of the sidewalk, closing his eyes for a moment, hoping they would never open again. The thought of that sounded irresistible until he did open them and found himself staring deeply at the love of his life. Then keeping his eyes open didn't seem so bad.
Phai sat too and started rubbing Alex's back. He moved his hair out of the way with the motion of his hand, while the blonde emptied his stomach once more. "Damnit Alex." The brunette whispered to himself frustrated that Alex would never talk about things, but loving enough to give Alex his space and time to figure out what it was he needed to figure out. Alex was too manly to ask for help. Something Phillip had taught him never to do as he was growing up.
Alex brushed away whatever thoughts were on his mind and patted Phai's leg. "Okay I'm ready. I need to finish."
"No you're not going anywhere." Phai's tone hardened.
"Yes I am." The blonde argued, defiance still reigning in his eyes. "Just five more laps."
"I don't think you're going to make it." Phai sighed placing hands on his hips.
Alex stood, steadying his stance but he quickly turned lightheaded and his entire body was ready to collapse but Phai caught him before he could hit the ground. "Okay maybe I'm not."
"No you're not. Here." Phai handed him the water bottle he knew he would need. "Drink it all."
Alex just took the bottle and held onto it, not drinking it just yet. He just stared at Phai.
Phai sighed with an apologetic smile. "You know I wanted you to stop but I didn't mean for you to literally just stop. You shouldn't have let Cassy do that to you."
Alex just shrugged. He felt like he wanted to pass out but he knew he couldn't pass because that would defeat the purpose of his eyes staying forever open so he would just have to deal with the idea of passing out and forever staying passed out.
Phai sighed. "Come on, let's go. You can't be here right now. We need to get you cleaned up."
Phai walked with Alex, holding onto him as he took him back to Alex's car. He fished for Alex's keys in the blondes pocket and took him to the passenger seat. He helped him get in and situated. "I will be right back. I'm gonna go grab our things." Phai said closing the door and Alex tried resting his eyes as Phai ran back to the school to let the coach know he was going to take Alex home.
After Cassy left the school infirmary, finding out nothing was broken, he headed to the gym showers to clean up the blood and grime all over his body. Once he was done with that he went to his locker to grab his stuff, trying to think of a place to go instead of home. If his father saw him like this, he would probably degrade him and beat the shit out of him some more so going home wasn't an option. He took out his phone and texted Cleitus, while putting on his shirt, slowly over his head, due to the pain soaring throughout his body. His muscles were tight and stiff and he was surprised he could move at all.
After that he reached for the duffel bag on the top shelf of his locker, grunting inwardly because of the weight. And his weak sore muscles couldn't lift anything heavy right now.
"Need a hand?" Roxanne came in, stopping by, leaning against one of the lockers in the boys room.
School was just out, the lights were already turning off and the janitors were already making their sweep around the school.
"Go away." The mean eyed boy replied.
"Isn't this a lovely surprise. Big and bad Cassy beat up by his old best friend. How cute. If I didn't know better you two are like an old married couple, kind of like your parents." She slipped her hands in the back pockets of her shorts.
Cassy turned to her. "You know what Roxanne, I hate Alex but I'm gonna give him the credit for leaving your skanky ass."
"You don't think I'm over him already?"
"You will never get over Alex. That's impossible for you. You can parade around all you want but deep down in that desperate, conceiving fucking soul of yours you still want to be all on that dick of his. But he will never give it to you because he likes his dick in someone else."
Roxanne walked up to Cassy, biting her lip as she ran her hands down his chest, looking up to him with the devil dancing in her eyes. "And where does your dick like to be?" She asked sneaking her hands down towards his fliers, slowly unzipping them, daring and challenge in her dark tone. "Oh yes, it likes to be where it can't go. In Phai." she whispered with little to no pity.
The boy tensed aggravated, as the dark girl reached into his jeans and started to feel him up while she placed her other hand around his neck.
Cassy glared into the eyes of the giggling girl. "Oh Cassy I say this often but you are really pathetic."
"And you're not?" he countered aggressively.
"No." She grinned. "Because what I want I get and I'm going to get Alex back. You are right about one thing. I'm not over him."
"How are you going to do that?" Cassy sent back a vibe that she was out of her fucking mind.
"Have faith." She said in a quiet purr. "Let's just say I will do us both a favor. All you have to do, is go to prom with me." A smile played upon her fruitful lips.
Cassy scoffed. "Phai doesn't like me enough to get jealous over seeing you and I together and I'm sure it's the same for Alex. Infact they're probably going to laugh at you realizing your desperate attempt at getting Alex back. I would never go to prom with you."
The teen girl stepped in closer to him still with her hand in his pants and he grunted under his breath as her cold hand wrapped tighter around his groin. "You don't have a choice." She stated. "I control the school walls and what's said and what isn't said and trust me no girl would go out with you if I tell them not to. You may be cute but I can change all that. You will ask me, I know you will." Roxanne then kissed him just at the corner of his lips seeking to tempt him fully. Cassy falling for the lust, found his hands gliding up the sides of her belly still expressing in his face how much dislike he held for the girl who was now becoming a dangerous woman. Her hands placing over his, guiding them up to her breasts. She knew men had weak minds when it came to sexual ways and she didn't see why she wouldn't take full advantage as long as she got her way in the end. She hummed against his mouth and threw her head back as his hands finally found under her bra. The girl smirked as he grabbed at her, kissing at her neck hungrily. She moaned as he felt her up.
But then Cassy stopped his chapped lips meeting at her ear and he whispered to her coldly. "Do not approach me again. If I'm up for it I will come to you." And he pushed her aside grabbing his things to go.
She wiped her lips before folding her arms and watched as he left through the locker room doors.
Alex hissed a bit when Phai brought the alcohol pad to his face. "Ow, ow." The blonde took Phai's hands and held them away from his face.
Phai sighed. "Oh don't be such a baby. You took the beating just fine, what's a little alcohol going to do."
"It stings that's all."
Phai smiled when Alex calmed down and let him return back to what he was trying to do.
Alex smiled back. "What are you smiling at?" The blonde asked.
"What are you smiling at?" Phai asked in return as he cleaned up the blood from Alex's face. He knew a lot about this type of stuff because his mom being a registered nurse and his father being also a medical aid in the military, so to there convenience, their were a bunch of medical kits and supplies laying around the house.
"I'm smiling at you smiling." Alex replied.
"And I'm smiling at you." Phai said. Then he kissed Alex on the top of his golden head of hair. "You are everything to me and I would do anything for you Alex. I hope you know that."
"I would do the same." The blonde responded looking back at him and for awhile there they never broke the contact until they both found themselves blushing madly, so they returned quietly back to being the patient and the doctor. Phai unwrapped some gauze and bandages for later.
Alex just watched Phai as the brunette took care of the bad growing injuries on his face, cleaning them out.
"I'm surprised nothing is broken." Phai said after putting pressure on the side of Alex's face to see what the damage done was.
"I have a thick skull." The blonde answered.
"Wow, your skull is as stubborn as you are? What are the odds?"
"Thankyou." Alex sounded softly.
"For what?" Phai lifted his eyes back up at the blonde.
"This. What you're doing."
"Always."
Then it went back to comfortable silence as Phai scuffled through the medicine cabinet looking for the Band-Aids they seem to run out of often due to Callista getting into shit she shouldn't get in to. "Alex, how am I?"
"What?" Alex immediately looked at him wondering if he really just asked him that.
"The visions that you have. How am I? What am I like?" Phai asked, finally finding some bandaids and walking back over to Alex. He halfway smirked as he saw Alex just staring at him. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing I could have sworn you asked me that before." The blonde shifted uncomfortably, and he winced, because even with little movement it caused more aching.
"No I never have." Phai shook his head applying a bandaid to Alex's gashed up elbow telling him to not move. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to though. I was just curious." Then he stood back. "Okay lift up your shirt."
Alex lifted up his shirt not knowing something would be there enough to shock Phai. "Jesus Christ Alex." Phai said examining the dark bruises and gashes all along his ribcage and stomach. "This is worst than your face."
"Thanks." Alex really didn't care.
"No I'm being serious, this is bad. You might have a broken rib or something or multiple broken ribs. A lot of these cuts need stitches Alex. Oh my god I didn't know skin could turn that color. I need to get you to a doctor."
"I'm not going to a doctor." The blonde said pushing back down his shirt. "I feel like shit but I'm not in bad enough shape to see the doctor."
"How the hell would you even know?"
"I wouldn't but I'm okay with you taking care of me." Alex smiled with a nod like it was just simple as that.
"I don't know what to look for Alex. I really should be calling your doctor." Phai grabbed the house phone.
"I love you. You are everything to me. I don't say it often and when I do I say it in my head. The first time I ever fell in love, I remember watching you sleeping peacefully in the boat that your father had made for you, by the pond. I don't remember a starting point in my life but I do remember you."
Phai was caught off guard not expecting any of that. He gradually calmed down about the entire doctor thing, as he now stood before Alex, his complete attention given.
"What I know of this general is that he's the love of my life. My moon. My stars. Because you shine in everything you do. You impress with everything that you do. You are highly individualistic something I can never be. Sometimes when I come off as detached because I'm hurting inside you always seem to know what to say and do to help me back on my feet again. You are kind and generous and you love me unconditionally. You are the very definition of love. You were my counselor, my role model and my best friend. I've always thought you were born just for me, just so that you can save me from myself. I also know that the gods, whichever god it may be sent you to me from the heavens above. Like a guardian angel, making sure I don't stay lost. Making sure that I can be found. Making sure that the revolution that has begun inside me calms down. That the war I've started within myself comes to an end. Because without you, it feels like I've never even been alive before and that nothing is ordinary about me. You are my heart Phai and you saved my life, countless of times. You would do anything for me. And what can I even say to that. How can I beat that? My love is weaker than yours and I don't deserve you. Phai, as I know you, you are eternal and flawless. Beautiful. Gifted. One of a kind. Intelligent. Pure hearted. Caring. Strong headed. Tough. Impressive. Imaginative. Shy. Cautious. Modest. Confident. Practical. Generous. Loving. Curious. Innocent. Beautiful. My god you are beautiful in every way imaginable. And I love you for that. I love you more than you could even imagine."
The brunette bit his bottom lip. He didn't know what to say and he looked at the phone in his hand and then back at Alex. He still couldn't say anything. He didn't know why it was so shocking. It just was. But he didn't understand why he didn't want Alex to know how much that meant to him.
His blue eyes peered away towards the window to the left of him before clearing his throat once more. "Um." His words faltered. Tears tried to escape his eyes. He had no idea what was wrong with him or where these emotions were coming from. He could have sworn he heard his heartbeat rumbling loud under his ribs. He brought his hand to swipe away the lines of water that had composed from his eyes down his cheeks.
"You shine when you cry Phai. And you don't have to say anything. But I need you to know that I love you. I loved you yesterday and I will love you today, tomorrow and any day that follows. I will love you through your pain and your joy and your sorrow and I will say it again and again until you get tired of hearing it. I don't know how else to put it."
Now Phai was frozen in place.
Alex lowered his head. "When Alexander first met Hephaistion, Alexander thought he was sold out of dreams until he realized that he was the one who held him under a spell. I wasn't supposed to know my future. I wasn't supposed to understand it but when I saw you, I lived it. You looked at me and glared and right then and there I already knew I became the sun and the air of your life. The sun to light my path and the air to help me breath. But for some reason only I knew it and you didn't. I looked away from you for awhile trying to focus my attention back on our teacher but I found myself stealing glances. You looked at me again, this time with stronger loathing. I remember smiling because now I was able to get your attention. I thought what a beautiful arrogance this boy had, thinking he can ignore his prince like that. You had me so wild inside, you had no idea. I knew right then and there everything I needed to do to make you mine. I told myself that I needed to promise four things in order to get you to be mine."
"What were they?" Phai didn't notice how tight he was clenching onto the phone. He also didn't notice that he just barely whispered and choked over the question. He also didn't know how long he could fight the urge to not jump at Alex and kiss him to death.
"I promised we were going to be friends beyond Achilles and Patroclus. I promised I was going to tame a black wild horse to take you and I anywhere we wanted around the world. I promised to prove my father and mother wrong, that I was capable of doing anything I put my mind to. I promised that in order for you to not leave my side, I was going to conquer the world so that I could conquer you and I did all of that for nothing. I just needed to prove myself. I wanted you to know how far I would go to get you. How far I would go to get the world for you but it all went to waste because I had you since the moment I saw you."
"So how did I, I mean how did Hephaistion respond when he figured out that what you did was all for nothing?" Phai asked with nervous speech.
Alex hopped off of the counter and stepped up to Phai, purposefully making close contact. "He took my hand, and brought me to his room. He closed the doors and excused the guards. He laid me on the covers of his bed and he started to play with me, teasing my feelings in a dark pleasure."
Phai kept eyes intently on Alex's. "Really?"
The blonde nodded as he inched closer to the brunette. "And my interest in him sparked like a flame." Alex cocked his head. "He traced my flesh with cold fingers and my eyes got lost in fire. My heart, my tongue, my skin was overheating and he had just the right touch to cool me down. He and I made love to each other and he told me that he loved me more than the sun and the stars as I drifted away into his arms."
Alex's lips slowly made contact with Phai's, sliding them first against his ear, then his cheek, then pausing to plant small kisses at his jaw. "The reason I've been stuck in a myth for so long Phai, is because you are far too good to be true. You are beyond my imagining and I have been imagining things far beyond my time to speak or to think. I could imagine an unknown world, building it to magnificence from scratch. I could imagine the splendor and beauty beyond any glory, previous kings and gods couldn't even achieve. But for some reason I couldn't imagine the brilliance and perfection of one human."
"Did you talk to me that day when you first met me?" Phai lifted curious and entranced eyes at Alex.
"Yea, the studies ended and no one seemed too fond of you but Nearchus and Ptolemy. So I waited patiently until they were done introducing themselves and until it was just you and I. We were told to clear out because it was raining but I said 'fuck the rain' and I came up to you and I said. 'Hello.' It was a bold introduction even for me, considering my nerves shaking and scattering throughout my body. You bowed your head slightly knowing me for my status. You said back 'Hello Prince Alexander. My father knows your father very well. It's going to be an honor to learn in your presence.' I remember nodding. And I said something so stupid."
"What?" Phai's mouth moved softly against Alex's lips.
"I said, 'You are not going to believe this but I think I was meant to be with you.'
"What made you think that?" Phai asked as Alex threaded his fingers softly through the brown thick hair of his friend.
"You said exactly that. You asked why I thought that and you had this deep confusion in your eyes. Like I was a weirdo. But I responded anyway. I said 'Because I feel like I know myself when I look at you.' You replied back, 'You don't know me Prince Alexander. It could be just your mind playing a trick on you. I get those tricks all the time.' It took me so long to win your heart and that's when I felt like giving up."
Phai was officially jealous of this Hephaistion of Alex's dreams.
"Did you give up?" Phai asked with deep blue eyes fixed onto dissimilar ones.
Alexander kissed Phai in a hurry. He ran his rougher hands down the skin of his lovers sensitive neck absorbing this perfect capture of time.
/
It's starting to pour, we should get inside. The new boy advised the prince who didn't look ready to go anywhere.
Wait. The prince stopped him. So you're not a myth? The prince asks in confusion.
Why would I be a myth? The new student asks back in deeper confusion.
Because you're flawless. You're like everything described in a story. You're like a fantasy. You could be a dream as well but you just don't know it.
I'm flattered but maybe you read too much mythical stories and apply it to your own lifestyle Prince.
I see it so why can't you?
See what? The brunette boy chuckled.The prince not being what he expected him to be.
Aren't you my other half?
No? Hephaistion shook his head.
That wasn't supposed to be your answer. Alexander now turned frustrated.
What was supposed to be my answer?
Your answer was supposed to be yes.
The browned haired boy smiles. Really?
Yes. The prince nods.
Bye Prince Alexander.
Then the new boy was gone from his sight just like that.
\
They were hiding but watching in secret through the thick woodlands at their captured prisoner trying to get away. Little did the general know that an unpleasant result would happen by his escaping.
Hephaistion was surrounded and before he knew it he was pitched to the ground by the Indians who had been prying on him. There were only five that the general counted before he swung the spear, piercing one of them through the heart. But immediately after the dead man collapsed, Hephaistion found himself outnumbered and he realized now that there were at least close to nine of them. He was pushed to the ground again and the enemy began speaking to each other in their language. The general attempted to crawl away but was stopped, being yanked back by his ankle. When the enemy had formed a circle around him closing in on him, the general looked up and saw the searing gaze of the one who had stepped in front of him. Then he backed away as fast as possible and his fear quickly sustained.
"This one is woman." One of the Indian men spoke to another while briskly pointing their spear at the outsider.
They laughed like children pulling the wings off of a butterfly, as the hunted one hit at one of the spears they had poking at his skin.
"He not woman if he can't make child." Another commented while lifting the mans chin with the tip of his javelin. Stroking the bumpy skin. Hephaistion growled at them striking at the spear which caused the spear to slip and leave a bleeding cut on the open throat of the pretty man.
They all joined in laughing once more when Hephaistion rubbed his neck of the blood.
"Please just let me go." The outsider pleaded.
"He begs like child." One spoke up disregarding his plea.
"Please." The general started to tear up. "I just want my king."
Then they busted out in wild laughs, and without seeing it coming the Indian who mocked him pierced the general's thigh with his spear after catching him off guard. Hephaistion cried out in anguish as he fell to one knee. Then the Indian with the spear and enthusiastic laughter proceeded to stab the same area, pushing way through the entire flesh and bone. By this time Hephaistion had already lost his spear, not being able to hold onto it as it was taken from him and as he fell on his back, his head getting heavy and the shuttering pain in his leg being to much to bear.
Hephaistion started to twist and lash once his mouth was covered with the dirty hands trying to keep him from screaming in torment from the spear twisting around in his open wound. They looked upon the struggling foreigner with flashes of curiosity as more hands met his goose bumped skin and as they planted his arms and hands to the ground.
Hephaistion was a bit familiar with India, only because of the battle which they almost lost and that he went with Alexander to speak to many chiefs and satraps of the Indian tribes they had conquered. But the one he really dealt with was Porus, the Indian ruler of the Nanda Empire but he recognized Porus' people, and these weren't the Indians of that tribe. These Indians were of a different tribe. A more hostile one.
Another aggressive attempt was made on the outsider as the Indian men tried stripping away his clothes, laughing and mocking his cries. "He even cries like a woman."
"Get off me!" Hephaistion shouted and squirmed not being able to render enough strength to keep them off. He then felt a swift hit to the face and a heavy hand pressing down at his neck, and they reveled in the strangling cries. And the enemy bounding and encircling him continued to touch and grab roughly and violently at the unwelcomed guest.
His eyes widened at the pointed arrow they had brought in front of his face. Hephaistion recognized the liquid poison at the tip of it, the one that struck his horse, and he fought and struggled much more drivingly in another attempt of escape, but they wouldn't let him slip away from them this time. "Please don't do this." He saw them bringing it under the flap of his chiton and armor and he tried kicking them away but his legs were restrained being forced to spread, as well as his arms. But there wasn't much he could do against nine men alone. Not to mention one of his legs were numb because of the constant blood flowing free.
His breathing became heavy as one traced filthy fingers down his cheek and lips. He wasn't prepared as he cried out when he felt the puncture and penetration of the arrow and the raking of multiple nails running down his skin, peeling his flesh.
Then the next thing he knew his sight was getting blurry, the poison kicking in instantly. His skin began to tingle. The feeling being like tiny bugs crawling over him. His screaming was muffled. He felt pain in more than one area of his body. He felt his muscles weakening and his throat dry and throbbing. He knew he was screaming. He knew tears were there. He knew a man was mounting him. He knew other men were holding him down, some forcing his legs further apart, as some used their fingers to violate him. He felt calloused hands squeezing and clenching his wrists cutting off the circulation. He felt them grabbing and pulling at clumps of his hair. He felt a wetness of tongues on his body. He saw their nasty teeth gnashing before he couldn't move a single muscle.
After forcing themselves inside of him, they brutally beat him. Then they left him on the jungle ground in leaves and mud, unable to move or speak. And he was just barely breathing.
Hephaistion had been through many Indian Territory before and was knowledgeable of the many different tribes of India and if he knew anything about them at all he knew how the men treated the women. They raped them and tortured them if disobedient or if one was unable to produce children. In this instance they were treating him as a woman. As insignificant. As an outsider. And as a lover to the Great King they had captured and killed. King Alexander had conquered many. Then after the long battle won, his men had took refuge where Alexander fell into acoma. They never thought he would wake up, but the plan was to make sure the king would get better, and then Alexander's plan would have been to keep conquering the rest of the tribes of India. But the news had got to some Indian tribes. They knew the man was dangerous. They knew the king was unstoppable. Alexander was a foreign king of great importance and great ambition and when they heard the news that the king was ill, they decided to seek him out, while he was still weak, capture him before he could conquer their people and then kill him so that they had nothing left to fear.
One of the children from the tribe, peeked out from the bushes at the 'wild haired' outsider bleeding out and dying. He crept out from his hiding spot and slowly approached the heaving man. There was nothing the little Indian boy could do for him but place a torn piece of red cloth from the former kings cloak inside of his hand. The general using any strength he had, slowly looked over at the boy and then at the cloth recognizing his lovers cloak.
Hephaistion kissed his king and the golden haired man ran his hands through his lovers hair. "I would be lost without you Hephaistion."
"Don't worry my love. I would find you."
Hephaistion's eyes started to gather and slip away more tears as he cried out as loud as he could for his dead king.
I didn't know what I fought for, but I knew what I wanted to fight for. The thing is I didn't have anything to fight for at the time and that's why my conscious mocked me. Then I met Phai. And the fighting never stopped.
And for once I experienced a real myth.
Here's another long chapter up! I apologize for any late updates. Thank you again for your patience as always and I hope you enjoy!
- Stranger