Chapter 7: Honouring Old Memories

"I think the way she corralled the Sergeant back just might have saved her stripes by saying she couldn't talk to him. And when she said that she was going to do it the right way, the way she was taught by the Sergeant, I think that acknowledges how much she's learned from the Sergeant while also reminding her who she is, the good she's done, the influence she has. What a great adaptation to their relationship, I'm relieved the asari didn't try to change it to make it their own, but rather stayed true to that origin."

Shepard prattled on once more over this beloved show of hers, while doing exercises behind the couch, for some reason.

Liara, on the other hand, was glad there was no eye contact between them - because she had her eyes closed, struggling not to fall asleep. She could see the merits and appreciated the multiple perspectives displayed during the conversations regarding moral dilemmas, but beyond that, she just couldn't get into the show. Procedure was just a bit much. There wasn't as much action as she had assumed there would be with a soldier picking this show.

"I can see where she gets her own personal inspiration from with how she handles matters, though. She seems to aspire to the traits the Police Commissioner and the Detective possess."

Lights were brightened just enough to illuminate the pathways and clutter of this room. Shepard finally took it upon herself to clean the mess she made during her pyromaniac experiment, but only moved the severed pieces of pipes to a corner so that she had more space for her exercises.

"I'm just taking a quick break," the human explained, "Got a headache from all this binge watching. Once it goes away then we can continue."

"Perhaps we should continue it tomorrow, if we have time?" Liara suggested hopefully. "I would hate to antagonize your concussion more than it already has been, lately."

"It's fine."

That flippant reassurance always did poorly at actually doing it's intended job.

"You should worry less about others and worry more about yourself, Dr. T'Soni."

Shepard came to the front of the couch and, peculiarly enough, had removed her synthetic arm from the socket. She placed it on the coffee table, where scientific curiosity itched to explore. It was such a strange sight to see her like this, even more so that she did not seem disturbed - then again, this was her reality. The nonchalance of it seemed to suggest that she has had these cybernetic limbs for quite some time. The archaeologist was caught gawking at the limb and she smiled awkwardly over it. Shepard chuckled gently and she picked up the arm, then held it out.

"Go on. I know you want to play with it."

"I-I wouldn't play with it, Commander."

"Mm, respectfully, I disagree. Studying is the same as playing to a scientist. Why else would you get into science if it were not your passion?"

Dismantled of a suitable rebuttal, all Liara could do was stare, her mouth mimicking that of Thessia's fish as she struggled to string a sentence together. The human just chuckled again.

"Rest easy. I'm not offended. This is preferable to you fretting, as you are now." Shepard playfully bounced the arm in her grip, where cybernetic fingers flopped in a lazy manner. "Go on. Indulge your questions. You have until I finish 3 sets."

She set it back down on the table before she took to the floor, proceeding with one-armed push ups. That itself beckoned other questions, and Liara cautiously pulled the cybernetic limb into her lap as she observed the human's organic arm, how muscles worked in tandem throughout the entire strenuous motion. It was no wonder the archaeologist's shirt couldn't fit, for she didn't have to worry about bulkiness in her arms.

"You're doing an awful lot of staring at the wrong arm, Dr. T'Soni," Shepard noted with amusement.

Embarrassed over having been caught again, Liara glued her focus to the limb in her lap. Her fingers carefully roved over the polished ball socket.

"You don't feel pain? I take it there are no pain receptors installed in the neural network with your arm, anyways. You don't seem bothered that it's disconnected. Do you possess proprioceptors, though? Your spatial awareness doesn't seem hindered."

"I do have implants that help me know where my limbs are, yeah. Pain is... Tricky."

Shepard took a brief break and pushed herself up into kneeling. She raked her sand-coloured hair out of her face - simultaneously fuelling a desire in Liara to see the beach - and gave a small shrug, her eyes there but not here.

"I presume you do not have nociceptors installed in your cybernetics, then?" Liara asked gently. "Doesn't that put you at risk for destroying them if you aren't aware of what is destroying them?"

"Parts can be replaced."

With that simple answer, Shepard delved into her next set. There seemed to be more of an urgency in it this time. The archaeologist was observing another instance of a glimpse as to why things were regarded the way that they were, seeking an answer that hopefully would be advice she could latch onto for her own recently-inflicted scars.

"You remember pain, don't you?" Liara murmured as she ran her finger down the mechanical forearm. "You remember it as if it's happened yesterday."

"This is beginning to sound like territory you don't want to tread, Dr. T'Soni," came the blunt warning.

"I... I don't mean to ask about the circumstances, b-but what I mean is... How do you do it? How do you move forward, despite that pain?"

For a moment, her eyes burned. One blink, and the world was watery. She blinked again and did her best to keep it at bay, to remain lucid and composed, not wanting to embarrass herself in front of a hardened soldier that had likely survived far worse nightmarish horrors than that mansion. She didn't want Shepard to wonder if she could even handle this investigation and mission anymore. She wanted to be strong.

"But how can anyone be strong, after that?"

Her thoughts were broken by a single sigh, and the couch's cushion bouncing her up, a ripple effect caused by the one who's crudely dumped herself beside the archaeologist.

"I don't. I haven't been able to move forward no matter how hard I try."

The quiet admission heralded a request for silence. Shepard seemed to be the one struggling this time, trying to string together a sentence. She strained a pitiful smile as she lifted her head and looked over, her hand slipping over Liara's knee with a tentative squeeze.

"I'm stuck in one place because of that pain. I know that's not really reassuring to hear, and I don't mean to say it to cause you worry that you'll be stuck too. I still try no matter what, no matter how many times I fail. It's a constant effort and it always will be. That's just life. If you can't find that strength in you to try the same, then just borrow from me for a bit. Lean on me. I'll carry you forward until you feel like you're able to try. And if you still can't make it? That's fine. I'll keep carrying you."

Shepard plucked the arm and began the somewhat slow process of installing it properly, ensuring the ball and socket moved fluidly as she tested various movements to calibrate it right.

Unknown to her, her words only made it harder to keep that watery world at bay. There was compassion lurking behind them even with the stoic expression.

"I don't know what you're telling yourself in your head, Dr. T'Soni, but you've got it in you. You can move forward. It might take some time, but I know you can do it. You're different than me."

Liara licked her dry lips, becoming aware of them through that instinctual movement. Her throat tightened and she croaked. "D-different? How so?"

"You have a different perspective in life," the soldier shrugged. She leaned back and relaxed on the couch as she kicked up her synthetic leg onto the coffee table. "I'm told often I'm a pessimist. I like to argue back and say I'm a pragmatist, but I don't deny that I don't have an optimistic view in life. Mine died a long time ago. You can move forward because you still have yours."

"For now. How long before mine will die like yours, too?"

Liara didn't have the heart to ask, for she was not ready to hear the truth. Not yet. Not right now.

"You don't think you can move forward, but you try anyways?" Liara blurted, a challenge unfolding before she could think about it. "I would argue that's not exactly being pragmatic. When your action is a direct contrast to your belief, the chances of failure are higher, and the immense effort needed to suspend that belief is therefore wasted."

A subtle sad smile tugged the corner of Shepard's lips. She nodded her head and shrugged again as her silent answer. It wasn't acceptable. Liara dug a little deeper.

"Don't you think that means you still have an optimistic view then, on some level?"

"I guess. I'd say it's just me being foolish and a severe lapse of judgment."

Liara chuckled softly. "Isn't that what optimism is, most times?"

She was proud to have earned the growth of that tamed smile a little more, but it still felt as though the soldier was in a shell. It seemed that Liara would have to employ all manners of her tools to unearth the discovery on this expedition, to sift the wanted elements from the unwanted materials - that being the front Shepard had up.

"Shouldn't you be focusing on yourself right now, Dr. T'Soni?"

"I am. You are an entertaining distraction with the puzzle that you are."

Shepard barked a raw laugh that had startled her, causing her to jump in her seat. She wasn't at all used to this unrestrained display nor her slip of bluntly stating something so rude. It seemed to be appreciated more than to be a cause for retribution though, a manner she would soon embrace as someone had in the way they expressed their feelings over Prothean artwork.

"Well, let's distract ourselves some more with another episode, then."

"I absolutely refuse, Commander."

The human's brow cocked up with amusement. Thankfully, instead of pushing the matter, she shrugged.

"Alright then. I admit, I had no other ideas except to binge watch tonight. So what do you want to do instead?"

For a moment, Liara's eyes flickered to the sand-blonde hair. Her fingers itched with a different kind of curiosity that she couldn't quite attribute in the name of science.

"Let's go to a beach in Skymeadow. It's roughly a 30 minute drive from here."

Shepard's gaze travelled to the balcony. "It's night, though. I thought beach trips were all about sunshine and umbrellas. Will you still enjoy it?"

"I will, and I won't be the only one," inner resolve guaranteed.

Liara's answer came in what she observed as the soldier's preferred way to communicate: through action. She rose from the couch, scooped up the synthetic hand, and pulled hard. Shepard didn't budge. She could try as hard as she wanted to pretend she wasn't, but she wouldn't fool anyone with that subtle smirk of hers. She chuckled when she rose abruptly, throwing the archaeologist off balance as she nearly tripped over the coffee table. A real hand encroached around her wrist and held her firmly, simultaneously pulling her grip away from the cybernetic limb for reasons not made known and only left to speculate, as usual.

"She let me study the arm earlier. Is she uncomfortable for it to be touched when it's 'attached' to her? Can she even feel any sensation at all?"

Her questions weren't going to receive answers any time soon, with the way she was pulled along to the exit. With all the practice she had lately to detect the subtle anomalies in Shepard's behaviour, it had become easier to detect the notes of excitement even in the stoic tones and expressions.

"I've never been to a beach before, Dr. T'Soni."

"Would you like to wait until morning, then?"

"No."

Shepard dragged just a touch harder. Though the firm grip was slightly painful, the growing enthusiasm made it too endearing to care. Liara's cheeks ached with her smile.

"It may be a more wholesome experience though, Commander."

"It will be regardless." Shepard glanced over her shoulder, her tamed ways melting away with how her eyes lit up. "Because we're going to go there and wait until morning too."

"Ah." Liara chuckled. "I see, you've put in considerable thought already. That is a very pragmatic approach indeed."

The soldier grinned.

"How do I..." Shepard's brow pinched in frustration. She struggled to cross the invisible line between grass and sand. "How do I walk in this?"

Every time she pushed the tip of her boot into the cool sand, Liara screamed at herself to remain calm and not smile or laugh, for the human seemed genuinely disheartened and frustrated over this dilemma of hers. Her eyes shot up with a call for help.

"It won't stop shifting, Dr. T'Soni. How do I make it stop?"

"You don't."

A chuckle bubbled in Liara's tone. Her desperate attempts not to smile were failing. She pinched her thigh as hard as possible as she approached the poor soldier, then held out her hand.

"You will get used to the sensation by the time you walk to the water, Commander. Just take off your boots and try not to focus on it. Listen to the waves instead."

"But..."

Shepard's brow pinched endearingly again, shooting an actual glare at the sand that was very reminiscent of the one she had given to the soup.

"Brainstorming painful ways to eradicate the beach?"

Liara couldn't help but tease. She laughed softly when those pleading eyes shot up at her with a promise for revenge.

"Take my hand already, Commander."

Her lips quirked up, her heart swelling from a memory with warmth she hadn't realized at the time, too preoccupied. It hit her hard now.

"Lean on me. I'll carry you forward until you feel like you're able to try. And if you still can't make it? That's fine. I'll keep carrying you."

There was something in the way Shepard stared at her that unsettled her, but whatever conclusion the soldier had reached was acceptable. She took her boots off and took Liara's hand. It still didn't stop the looks that was chillier than the sand itself. They took it slow, and Liara never made a peep - no matter how much she wanted to - whenever Shepard would put on the brakes and stop where she was, staring at her feet as she wiggled her real toes. Then, with an almost childlike curiosity, she scrunched her toes to scoop the sand beneath them, her facial features softening with a wonder.

"This is strange..."

"Isn't it?" Liara agreed, hoping to break open the shell just a tiny bit more and see what kind of turtle was hiding inside. "Back then in university, if I got stressed because of upcoming exams or had difficulty comprehending concepts, I'd visit beaches like this."

"At night, too?" Shepard's eyes never unglued from the sand.

"Yes. I feel like there are so many more things to experience then, and the solitude to enjoy it."

Something inside of her bloomed warmly when the calloused hand - chafed to come to her rescue back at the mansion - had squeezed, holding tighter as Shepard worked out the finer details of her balance and curiosities. It was when the soldier finally lifted her head to take a look around that sent Liara rushing to share what she enjoyed.

"The stars always look so different, far away, from the ground. Can you feel the breeze? Hear what the ocean is trying to say? See how all the little things in nature work together to paint this wonder before us?"

For a moment, Shepard retreated in her shell and seemed anxious instead. Her gaze flickered about in that intimidating way as if she was analyzing their environment for threats. Her hand tensed, her shoulders hiked. She looked at Liara as if she was insane upon her next suggestion.

"Close your eyes, Commander."

"But-"

"We're safe here. It's just you and me."

"We don't know that. We could have been followed, and someone could be waiting to ambush us."

"If that was the case, do you not think we would have already? There have been many opportunities both in mother's estate, and outside thereafter it, where we were most vulnerable."

Shepard frowned slightly. She glanced around regardless, but at least eventually closed her eyes. She sucked in a slow, deep breath. She wiggled her toes again. Then she smiled.

"This is... Relaxing."

She opened her eyes and looked out to the gentle rolling waves. There was a peacefulness to her that she hadn't possessed before, a peacefulness where Liara could actually feel relaxed around this human now too, without anxiety getting in the way. Their connection broke when Shepard wandered forward of her own accord, and the archaeologist grew embarrassed over her growing realization of her feelings, when she glanced at her empty hand in disappointment.

"I've been enjoying my time with her, even with our interests being the opposite. There's something about her that compels me to close the distance, no matter how far away she is."

"What's swimming in these waters like?" Shepard asked as she braved the unsteady sands to reach her destination.

"Cold," Liara answered plainly. She smiled when she received a wry look in return. "I would caution that we wait until morning before we swim, the water will be calmer then."

She took off her sandals as she drifted down the beach, heading over to walk at the shore line as the waves gently lapped to and fro at her feet. She held her breath for a moment to listen carefully as she experimented with the cadence of her gait. Her heart swelled evermore when she could hear how the steps behind her matched her pace - along with mutters of how strange wet sand was.

"Is it because of the Prothean beacon that I find her fascinating? A case of hero worship, due to the... Events... In mother's home? I admit, the beacon has piqued my curiosities. Initially."

Liara looked up at the stars as her arms swung behind her, fingers loosely interlocked with the sandals hooked between. Her mind wandered with her feet. It was not the cause of her growing feelings that troubled her, nor that they had gotten to this degree so soon. What saddened her was that she knew her feelings would not be mutually reciprocated.

"More so because it seems that her emotions have been buried and left to decay. It seems I will get considerable use out of my doctorate with her more than any other expedition."

"What are you thinking of, Dr. T'Soni?"

The question caught her off guard. She composed her surprise before she glanced over her shoulder, expecting to meet eyes. Shepard was looking up at the night sky though. The distance between them shortened to the point where the soldier's breaths warmed the presence around her, and she stretched her synthetic hand up to the stars.

"Right now," Shepard murmured, "I'm thinking how strange you are."

"Well. That's blunt. I suppose the one comforting thing I could take away from this is that at least I'm not the only one who finds her foot in her mouth."

Liara arched her brow and turned around, walking backwards as she made it a point to express her honest thoughts with her expression. The human looked down from the stars and chuckled when their eyes met.

"I'm sorry, that didn't come out right. I don't mean it in a bad way."

"I gathered as much." Or, more like: "I should hope not."

"Just... You are unlike other asari I've met. There is something about you that seems human, you know, not that you are, but... You're just down to Earth. Or, well, down to Thessia, I guess." Shepard smiled that strange smile, the closest thing to sheepishness the archaeologist will ever see. "You know what I mean now, right?"

"I could do with a more clarifying statement," Liara teased.

"Alright, I take that back. You're a wretch."

Liara laughed. That feeling inside of her was growing with every little moment like this, and it was saddening her even more instead. She enjoyed observing the human, learning of her quirks, delving into her mind to understand what was making her tick, for good or bad. But she didn't need to cross the line to know that talking about these emotions would sooner encourage the turtle to hide in the shell rather than come out of it. Especially with duty being the obvious and primary motivator, whether the Commander was aware whether she actually wanted to do her duty, or not.

Silence fell upon them again. It was usually comfortable and sought after, but Liara was burning with so many questions that she needed answers to, answers that would only extend this distance between them. She turned around and focused on tracing the subtle curve of this shoreline, up until she wandered further back onto the sand and found a spot to sit.

It was a tense minute for the soldier, it seemed, as she had taken her sweet time to gauge just how close she was comfortable with before she had sat down too. They could easily fit three more bodies between them. Liara tried not to sigh, beginning to grow frustrated over her immature handling as she navigated her own emotions.

Little by little, though, Shepard scooted over. The archaeologist struggled to stay quiet, biting the inside of her cheek as she kept her gaze glued to the waves, pretending to be oblivious to the shortening distance between them. When there was space enough for one body, she laid down and spread her arms out to stare at the sea of stars. She would be a liar if she said she hadn't wished for the tips of fingers to brush hers. She would be a fool to believe in the hope that it'd actually happen.

The air shifted, and clothes rustled. There was a slight thud against the sand. A quick stolen glance showed that Shepard had laid down too.

"Is she following my lead still?" Liara thought, amused by the prospect.

"You're down to Earth," Shepard murmured. Her eyes slipped shut. "It's easy to relax around you. And I apologize."

Liara turned her head, studying the soldier's expression - and trying not to realize anything more than just what kind of expression was being made.

"You're apologizing for... Relaxing around me?"

"No," the human chuckled. "I suppose I could do with more clarifying statements. I meant my apology for being so suspicious of you. I think I was just searching for something because I don't quite relax very easily, as you may have already seen."

"Yes. Several times. You were tense even during your show."

"Ordinarily, it does not take me long to make a decision and assess someone. But I was suspicious for... Well. Not being suspicious. I know that sounds contradictory. Were I not biased the way that I am right now, I would have already made my call back when we shared our first wine in my quarters."

"Do you not think you had, in a way, when you gave me permission to call you Commander?" Liara didn't give time to answer that, her priorities realigning. "Either way, you have nothing to apologize for. I understand why you needed to be cautious, and why you still feel that need to be cautious." She looked back at the stars, before her eyes slipped shut too. "But thank you for that. It's nice to know why."

"That too," Shepard blurted. "You're not like anyone when you do that."

Not entirely up to date with what the human was referring to, Liara could only think to take the opportunity and take a jab at what was becoming their own little inside joke.

"I guess it's a good thing I'm not like other people."

She waited for a response, disappointed when she didn't get one. Perhaps it was an overstated joke that was no longer a joke. Though it was nice to hear that the human was relaxing, Liara was still on a pendulum that could swing one way to the next in the blink of an eye. Then the sand shifted. She felt more grains spill and coax against her, before she realized that the brush against her shoulder was due to the warmth of another shoulder.

"I'm trying to think of a question so that I can learn more," Shepard admitted quietly. "I need a topic. What else can you tell me? About culture, or something, whatever you are comfortable talking about."

"That's... Too broad."

It stumped her, even when she tried to think of something specific. Of course there were many things she could talk about, or stories to share. Under pressure, though, her mind was blank. All she could keep thinking of were her own questions, and it was the only answer she had at the moment.

"Well, you've seen where I've grown up. Beaches are my second home. I used to play skyball often, which I believe is similar to what humans call 'volleyball'."

"But with biotics?" Shepard guessed.

Something about her tone made Liara chuckle. "But with biotics, yes."

"Mental volleyball. I'll have to try that someday." Shepard's shoulder nudged just the slightest bit harder. "What were you like, growing up? What was your mother like?"

Had this been asked yesterday, Liara wouldn't be able to help her own suspicion of whether or not it was asked just to gain some intel on their enemy. It was different now. Strange, even. There was a drift that pulled them closer rather than apart. She stole a glance and observed as the soldier's face relaxed more and more, minute by minute, attentiveness slowly slipping away. Liara smiled and dared to shift so that her shoulder pressed just a little bit harder too.

"I was a wretch, growing up."

Shepard chuckled at that, though lazily, sleepily.

"Mother was..."

Liara's gaze drifted back up to the stars. She reached up to them. Her heart swelled painfully when a few seconds later, a different hand reached up beside hers. The world turned misty in a blink.

"Mother used to do this with me. She'd reach like this with me, as you are." Liara stretched her fingers as wide as the warmth that rushed through her. "She used to ask me what I was thinking of, what I dreamed of. She was always interested in what I had to say. She was always interested in challenging me too, to see what I had to feel and think about what with whatever she was challenging me with. We would get lost for hours in a single topic, laying on the beach like this. We would debate until the first light and realize how much time had passed then."

Emotion tightened her throat as it all came bumbling out like the waves lapping at the shore. She chuckled mirthlessly when she could sense and see the awkwardness in the soldier's gesture as the hand beside hers struggled to figure out whether to stay up or quickly sink back into the sand. For a moment, it dipped.

Then Shepard abruptly took her hand.

Hope rose, though the human's head turned away, her face unseen. She cleared her throat audibly.

"Let's reach in a different way then. I don't want to see you cry. I'm... Not good with comforting people. I'm sorry for bringing up a painful subject, Dr. T'Soni. Let's talk about something else."

She was running away from emotion. It stung, to be honest, a bittersweet victory in this simple manner of holding hands, despite unsaid feelings. Liara drew in a small breath to steady and compose herself. She closed her eyes and let her hand fall as dead weight, bringing her and the human back to the sand. She struggled to think of a new topic.

"I don't know what else to talk about," Liara admitted. "What about you? What were you like, growing up? What was your mother like?"

There was a sharp breath. Tension in the hand she held, as if she was now gripping a rock. She didn't press and felt awkward over what to say now, whether she should apologize herself for apparently bringing up a painful subject. But slowly, surely, the shell opened up just a tiny bit, over time.

"I was a wretch, growing up," Shepard's tone subtly danced.

Somehow, somewhere, Liara found laughter bubbling out of her. However faint, however quiet, it was still hope in the midst of these dark clouds hanging over her mind.

"My life... It... I don't know, Dr. T'Soni. It was really mundane. I'm afraid I'll just bore you."

Liara smiled and was already hooked.

"The Commander, mundane? It's hard to even imagine her wearing anything other than the uniform on her."

"Try me Xio," Liara clicked her tongue twice, "Mara. I assure you that you won't."

Those chuckles that skipped out the soldier sounded very familiar - almost like the heinous ones during the pyromaniac experiment in Liara's home. When Shepard made eye contact, there was subdued deviousness in the depths of her gaze. It was as if she was delighted that her fake name was actually being entertained.

"She's a mischievous one when she wants to be. I'll have to stay on my toes and be wary the next time she tries to pull off something like that in a serious way. Iryxetia believed her for sure."

Shepard's voice and gaze travelled to some distant place in the stars as she told her story.

"Well, I grew up on a farm on Mindoir, a human farming colony in the Attican Traverse. So... Yeah." Shepard looked over. "Story of my life. Pretty boring, right?"

"Okay, with where her eyes went even before she started telling that story, I was expecting a lot more."

They stared at each other. Liara let go of their hands and pushed herself up on her elbow. She leaned over as she tried not to give a pointed look, but rather one that showed she was engaged and ready to pull teeth from this one.

"What was farming like? What kinds of things were you harvesting? Did you ever do it by hand?"

"My family had a small animal farm, but that was for us and family friends. My parents..."

The light shut off in Shepard's eyes again. Her voice suddenly sounded like rocks grating each other, but she pressed onward as if nothing was happening, or perhaps she was just not aware.

"They preferred to do it all by themselves. We grew our food and cooked everything from scratch, made our tools too. No machines. Dad insisted it was better quality for both our harvested food and our lives if we put our backs into it. Mom was the brains behind our tools, taught me what I know to build some small things, like that blowtorch at your place."

"I wouldn't call that 'small'."

Unsure when that light and life would come back on, Liara continued with hesitance. "What kinds of animals did you have?"

"Only the ones from Earth that were able to survive in Mindoir's atmosphere. Cows are resilient. The ones we had looked different than the pictures in my textbooks though. Ours had more arms. Kind of looked closer to the pictures of deers instead. They were really grabby though, had to be careful if you turned your back on them. They loved to take your credit chit."

For a moment, something flickered, her eyes still far away, but her voice possessing a little bit more life as she chuckled.

"Named the most kleptomaniac of our cows 'Shifty', who used to come up to my window at night. If there was stuff I didn't like to eat, I'd give it to her. Had to prop it by the window sill in such a way where she would feel like she was stealing it though, and then I'd pretend to get mad. I hung out with her the most, out of the herd. Loved her. Think she loved me too, but who knows with animals?" Shepard's lips quirked with a soft smile, reaching to the stars. "Hard to say when she loved to steal my allowance more than anything else, that asshole..."

Liara turned to rest on her stomach as her elbows dug in the sand. Now, more than ever, there was a feeling of closeness and she prayed this distance between them would remain, that Shepard wouldn't snap out of her memories and open up even more. And she did. She regaled tales of mutated chickens and how her favourite activity was to go fishing with her father.

It was hard to imagine it all, but Liara hoped to see it for herself someday, even if it was far in the future. It would be worth it even if it was just for a second to see this stout dutiful soldier in an amusing pair of dirt covered overalls instead.

"Do you still stay in touch with your parents?" Liara asked hopefully.

She was already coming up with an entertaining interpretation as to what kind of parents Shepard has, and if they all sit down to watch procedural drama shows.

"When this mission with Saren is over, could you give me a tour of Mindoir, Commander?"

Her hope was crushed. She saw something die in Shepard's eyes, and the soldier shut off like a machine. She looked over with those lifeless eyes and voice, her awkward smile controlled and forced as if trying to emulate emotion. What was said - and most importantly what was not said - was an answer in itself.

"Sure, but it might bore you. Even after Mindoir was rebuilt, they remained as a farming colony. Just with extra security." She closed her eyes and folded her hands behind her head. "The lake isn't the same anymore... But we can go fishing. Make new memories and honour old ones."

Liara didn't have the heart to clarify if that was how Shepard stayed in touch with her parents.