Chapter 8: Take a Hint
Dull light beyond closed eyes gently stirred Liara awake. She stole a few selfish moments after her brain had already oriented itself to current reality, listening to the waves, to the wind, to the insects, to the breathing beside her. Except one of the most vital of those things was missing.
Liara looked over, and heart fell with disappointment. There was the faintest impression in the sand, where a body once laid, now only embraced by space. Her eyes travelled about, first and foremost to the trees to see if there were more motion sensors hiding in the premises. She truly wouldn't put it past the hyper-vigilant soldier to do so.
"Where is she, though?"
Cold muscles groaned and stiff joints popped as Liara pushed herself up into sitting, brushing the back of her knuckles against her cheek to feel the slight chill that had coated her skin. Perhaps it wasn't prudent to sleep out here without a campfire or adequate attire to keep warm. Her inner grumbling over the cold ceased upon the marvel of the sunrise demanding her attention. She drew her knees to her chest and rested her chin on her forearms, smiling away as she studied all the colours. This - and how the stars were still bright in the sky - never ceased to be a breathtaking wonder for her.
"Is mother still able to appreciate the sunrise in her heart, to understand the poetry she used to recite in the moment?"
A bittersweet thought that only had a brief time to torment her. Not too far below the sunrise, she had spotted something peculiar in the waves that had significantly calmed since last night.
Rather: someone peculiar.
She would have had to be blind to not recognize that rigid posture, even if all she could see was the human's back. Even in what should have been the most relaxing experience of them all, the poor soldier was a glorified sculpture instead as she stood knee-deep in the almost-still water. Her real hand betrayed her emotionless ways with the way curious fingers skimmed the surface of the water. The sunrise's reflection gradually became less subdued as the cool hues had warmed with its ascent, much like what had gradually happened to that stiff body.
Liara buried her smile in her arms and relaxed as she observed the natural wonders of what being inquisitive was like. Shepard had waded a little bit deeper until the waves lapped calmly at her waist. Her synthetic hand slowly planed across the surface, causing ripples.
"Is she aware that she herself is that motion too, causing ripples in others' lives?"
There was a growing sense of peace in this particular study. That rigidity was floating away, where the flow of curiosity and movement was becoming smoother. Then Shepard stilled. Her head seemed to lift up, possibly looking at the sunrise, and Liara's smile waned a little when sunglasses were taken out of a pocket.
"How unfortunate that she cannot experience the best part about coming to the beach. At least she could see the astronomical twilight and a good part of the nautical phase."
The opportunity to be inquisitive seemed to slip away as those sunglasses slipped on. Shepard just stood as still as the water when the ripples faded away, where past actions ceased to matter as silence fell. Perhaps that was something the soldier found herself thinking and believing more often, with her penchant for cynicism. Liara moved at a leisurely pace when she rose, wanting to absorb these last few selfish moments of this scenery before her.
{See how all the little things in nature work together to paint this wonder before us?}
Her lips quirked at the memory, particularly that of Shepard expressing her wonder by calling things 'strange'.
"I suppose it would be, for one entangled so intimately with conflict."
With sandals abandoned in the sand, Liara embraced the chill of the water as her feet submerged in the shoreline. She crossed her arms in a pathetic attempt to generate warmth. The only comfort she could find was the focus she invested in the body meters in front of her, studying those subtle cues of shoulders already alerted to her presence.
"Good morning, Shepard," she murmured as tranquilly as she could.
Maybe it would help settle the soldier's instincts down enough to truly attain a state of relaxation in this selfish moment of hers.
"Good morning, Dr. T'Soni."
That sand-blonde head betrayed no notion of turning any time soon, but those shoulders stayed vigilant. There wasn't a doubt in the archaeologist's mind that there were eyes trained on their surroundings, if there existed no motion sensors.
"I doubt she fell asleep. My last memory was... Of her sitting up, watching the ocean. I remember closing my eyes and drifting away to the sounds of her breathing."
There was also no doubt that her concern would just be repelled if she brought the human's lack of sleeping to attention. And, judging by how quickly Shepard confronted her from the picture-taking in the apartment, it was made apparent that she hadn't slept a single minute of that night on the couch either. Liara wondered if that may have been the reason why the soldier wasn't turning around now, and she had a feeling that direct confrontation would only spurn the turtle to hide deeper in it's shell.
After strenuous awkward minutes of silence, Liara attempted - feeling absolutely pathetic in the lame way she had - to break it.
"How's the water?"
That at least earned a turn, a brow almost cocked up over the rim of her sunglasses in amusement. That subtle smile was a dead giveaway.
"Cold," Shepard answered wryly.
Try as she might to pretend she wasn't, she was most definitely being mischievous in her own little way.
"You could join me," the soldier blasphemed.
"Or not and avoid freezing to death," Liara countered. Her lips automatically quirked upon the sound of a chuckle. "On that note: how aren't you? How long have you been in there?"
"Hard to say." Shepard shrugged. She turned to face the sunrise again. "It's not so bad. When I was training for the special forces at the Villa in Rio de Janeiro, we used to get buckets of ice-water dumped on us, and it could happen at any time of the day. Mostly mornings to make you miserable." Her fingers lazily swirled about the water's surface, a sense of nostalgia in her tone. "This brings me back."
Stumped, Liara stared. "You sound as though you miss that."
"Those were the good days," Shepard agreed, and was horrifyingly amiable about it all.
She was dead serious.
"Is she also insane?"
The soldier waded deeply until she swum forward, and turned to float on her back. She seemed to need to take large gulps of air to keep her ballooned up on the surface, with her synthetic limbs submerged. Perhaps buoyancy wasn't on Shepard's immediate list of necessary features. Her excursion didn't last long and she dove under, breaking the surface of the water a moment later as she made her way back to the shore with a smile that seemed somewhat forced, as if trying to reminisce.
"Back then, I only had to worry about those buckets, or when rations were going to be skipped, or when we might be sleep deprived to discipline us for our 20-hour long scenarios."
"That..." Liara's forehead pinched. "That sounds..."
"Like a breeze, compared to what we are forced to deal with now. They never trained me for the problems I face now. This water..." Shepard stopped for a moment, glancing over to gesture to the endless horizon at sea. "I feel like I am lost out there, and no amount of swimming will get me anywhere or do anything. No one will hear me if I scream out there. No one will know that the ripples that eventually reach this shore are because of me, drowning."
This level of introspection caught the archaeologist off guard. She wisely stayed silent, or more like, she just didn't trust her mouth in case if expressing her surprise over this confession would propel Shepard farther out in that horizon, eternally left to scream alone.
Unfortunately, though her mouth was sealed shut, her expression seemed to betray her when the soldier looked over as if to gauge her reaction. Shepard smiled that strange smile, the only thing closest to sheepishness.
"Sorry, Dr. T'Soni. I didn't mean to unload on you like that. It won't happen again."
Urgent to steal this selfish moment before momentum stole it away from her, Liara waded into the water with her resolve.
"You don't need to apologize, Commander. I want you to. I want it to happen again. I want all of this to happen again more often. This sunrise, this beach, you exploring it all, the feelings and thoughts it invokes, even and especially if you unload like this. You are not lost, alone. It... I..."
Her resolve withered.
"Let's work together so that neither of us drowns," she finished lamely as she inwardly chastised her cowardice. She strained a pitiful smile as she offered her hand. "Or we can at least scream together."
The longer her offer wasn't taken, neither moving, the more restless she felt. She stayed steadfast, both on land and on eyes. The boat came to port. She knew that they no longer held eye contact - even hiding behind sunglasses - when Shepard's head turned out to the side, almost as if timid. She had taken the offer with her synthetic hand, where the biting chill of metal had shot a shiver right up Liara's arm and through her. She bit her tongue with her renewed resolve to remain silent, she refused to complain. This wasn't just a hand. It was a bridge.
And apparently it was also a trap.
There was a second of a smile in her peripheral vision, vision that was soon blurred as she sailed through air, then blotted and submerged. The cold shock of water swallowing her nearly overwhelmed her, but a fire was ignited in her heart and her brain oriented itself to her current reality much faster this time. She kicked off the sand floor and launched herself to the surface, waving an arm to launch a splash as she shot an indignant look to the soldier who revealed why she had abused the unnatural strength of her cybernetic arm with a cheeky wave of her hand.
"Let's start working together on that now, Dr. T'Soni." Shepard taunted.
Her stoic ways weren't going to fool the archaeologist anymore.
So, due diligence fairly compensated as Liara abused the unnatural strength of her biotics with a cheeky wave of her hand. She smirked as she casually lifted the soldier and floated her further out. Much further out. She stopped once she was sure that plummeting from that height wouldn't warrant hitting the beach floor, then released her hold and watched Shepard crash into the water like a meteorite.
There was almost a moment of panic, of wonder whether the human could actually swim, up until laughter broke the surface of the water.
They walked back home, not wanting to soak the sky-car in their drenched clothes. Though Armali never slept no matter what district one was in, there was a refreshing calm that blanketed the mornings. Liara rubbed at her arms and tried not to shudder too viciously, nor shoot dirty looks at how the human seemed entirely within her element right now.
"Perhaps humans are cold-blooded like the lacertilias." Liara smirked a little. "Anthropomorphise in reverse, attributing traits and behaviours of animals to a human rather than vice versa. At least she is finally becoming a little more comfortable, outside her uniform."
A notion she couldn't share herself. Her choice of attire made her self-conscious with the very scandalous fact that she was wearing a white blouse. Granted, at least the fabric had a suitable enough amount of layers so as not to be too revealing, but regardless, she made yet another mental note not to make the same mistake for the next time they'd visit a beach, whenever that may be. At the very least, the only discomfort Shepard seemed to be experiencing was the out-of-water sensation of not being literally in her uniform, with the way her hand would wander and pat her thigh.
"Oh, no, that's not right. Goddess, how could I forget? She left her guns on the Normandy and is still concerned about threats. That's likely why."
With the sunglasses in the way, she couldn't observe the fleeting eyes scrutinizing their surroundings. It saddened Liara, to be honest, to see how this human was stuck in this perpetual cycle where it was near impossible to determine whether threats existed or not. She could understand in a war zone, of course, but where did the war zone end in a soldier's mind? Yes, they were in Armali to gather intel, if there was any - but this was a city. This wasn't a battlefield.
Liara kept her concerns to herself, though it didn't stop her from worrying, up until they had finally reached her apartment block. Her feet picked up speed at the promising thought of a nice warm shower, and when she turned in the elevator, she caught a lingering smile as the human entered to stand beside her.
"Did you see something funny?" Liara asked as she pressed the button.
"Yeah. You."
She shot a wry look. "I see you're becoming quite comfortable with being rude."
"That's not what I mean," Shepard chuckled. "Sorry, yeah that didn't come out right. It's just, you suddenly got life in you. And I know what you're excited for."
"Oh? You know? And what is it that I'm excited for?"
"A hot shower."
Liara nipped her cheek and fixated her eyes on the elevator doors. "I could be excited for other things."
"You could be," Shepard agreed with a hum.
Silence fell.
Awkwardness didn't have time to settle in with mischief showing it the way out.
"You're not, but you could be."
"Oh, you!" Liara gave a playful shove. "I see you're becoming quite comfortable with being trouble."
All Shepard had to say was written all over her face, in the tiniest hitch of the corner of her lips.
When they stopped at their floor, Liara made it her mission to be the one to leave the human behind this time. But she was beaten. The abrupt swiftness of a body passing her, breaking into her apartment once again, had left her stupefied.
"I am curious how she knows my password, but... Do I actually want to ask?"
Rivulets of water formed a trail and she followed the path, her heart slowly shrinking in horror when she pieced together where the trail was going: to her living room, up her stairs, around the corner of her bedroom to... The bathroom. Soon, she was standing before the door, listening to water running on the other side. She rested a mournful hand on the door. Her forehead accompanied a second later.
"You can be so cruel, Commander."
A little devious chuckle skipped on the other side.
"You snooze, you lose, Dr. T'Soni. Should've moved faster. Would help you warm up some more, too."
Liara sighed. She accepted her miserable fate and plodded over to her bed, where she began the slow process of plucking at her clothes to release the suction on her skin. She grabbed herself a towel and wrapped it around as she pushed the slob of slop down the laundry chute, then prepared her next outfit for the day. She found it peculiar that she couldn't find the soldier's uniform anywhere - probably already taken inside the bathroom to prevent any acts of revenge.
"Will I ever catch up to her? She always seems to be a few steps ahead, every time. I feel like the only time I'll catch her off guard is if I plot something to happen on a completely unrelated and normal day so that she doesn't expect any threat from me then."
It was something to ponder, quite rigorously now, thanks to being shut out of her own amenity. Her entire body melted as soon as she heard the door hiss. And her face flamed. Out walked a human who would find it in her best interest to cover up.
"C-Commander-" Liara spun around, clutching the knot of her towel with an iron-grip. "There are towels in the bathroom."
"Hm? Yeah, I saw. Didn't need it. Thanks, though."
"No, no, that's not what I'm pointing them out for. Is this how military life is on board the Normandy? Nobody cares?"
What a dreadful thought. She wasn't looking forward to assimilating with that part of culture.
Bare feet plodded and clunked about. Shepard nonchalantly went down the stairs to the living room, where her clothes weren't at all hidden, with an already-prepared uniform slung over the back of the couch. Liara was stuck gawking at the soldier's back, her mind unable to comprehend the casual demeanour of this all. It also gave her the opportunity to see how exactly the cybernetics were fixated on an organic body, and her heart twisted at how there were so many scars painted on the canvas. It was proof of hardship, of survival, and still this young woman continued on. The site of which the synthetics were soldered on to made some parts of the skin looked bunched up like folds of a blanket.
"One would think it is out of a sense of duty and determination that she soldiers on, but our talks have left me with a growing sense that she is not continuing to serve because of that."
Before Liara realized, she was behind the soldier, running a finger along the edge of the shoulder socket. At the very least, Shepard had time to don her undergarments and uniform pants, leaving the rest of her muscles on display as they rippled with tension over the touch.
"You've been through so much," Liara whispered sadly.
It seemed to be the catalyst to movement once again, and Shepard fixed a bra on.
Trails of water traced lines down the back as the human's hair seemed to function as a sort of sponge. Shepard sucked in a sharp breath when Liara's curious finger travelled over a bumpy grotesque scar in the shape of a jagged hole, situated on the lower back. The silent question didn't need to be voiced.
"A drill," the soldier answered plainly. She seemed to hesitate with the shirt in her hands. "Back when I was captured and tortured for the gold codes to a nuclear payload, after the idiots assassinated the Commander-in-Chief. Not that I knew the launch codes, but they never found out either way."
Liara grimaced, her entire body convulsing with a shudder. Her own lower back ached at the terrifying thought.
"You should look away, Dr. T'Soni. None of my scars are happy stories. You have enough sitting on your mind."
"After all of this, and she still..."
The archaeologist resolutely pressed on another thick circular scar. It took time before she got an answer.
"Impaled by a broken pipe."
Another scar. Multiple scattered little x's that curved around the soldier's ribs, on the side of her synthetic shoulder.
"Just some shrapnel."
"Just. Goddess... Was this how she lost her arm? An explosion?"
Another. Teeth marks on the back of her organic tricep.
"Got a little swarmed by husks and one of them bit me. Broke straight through my shields and armour. Got lucky that we picked up Chief Williams that mission, she's got a good aim."
Each scar had a little story. There were some the soldier hadn't remembered. Some Liara had avoided. She tried not to look at the fresh bruises, especially when she had circled to the side and caught glimpse of the large one on the stomach. The recent cuts and gashes alternated in their treatment, ranging from stitches to tissue adhesive glue to simple strips of tape. She wondered if there was a discrepancy between muscle mass and metal weight, but didn't have the heart to ask even if it would be deemed a 'safe' question.
With the sunglasses on, it was just a little less intimidating to peruse these scars even though Liara knew she was being watched closely. Despite that, instinct guided her to circle around the back. She carefully embraced the battered soldier, mindful of all the injuries and scars. It took work to wound her arms around both muscle and metal with how stiff Shepard suddenly locked down.
Liara didn't care for the awkwardness that settled between them now.
Quietly, the soldier cleared her throat.
"Dr. T'Soni, what are you... What is... This?"
There were so many answers. Answers she didn't have the courage to voice. Not all of them, anyways.
"Hugging," Liara answered plainly, a realization for herself too. It made her stomach quiver nervously over it. "I just wanted to say thank you. I haven't yet."
"But you have? About Therum, right?"
Shepard started to turn her head, but something seemed to have changed her mind and she faced forward. She grew even more rigid. It felt like a century had passed before a tentative hand - the real one - had awkwardly circled around the archaeologist's elbow.
"I mean back in mother's home."
Liara took a small step back so that she rested her forehead against the back of the soldier's wet neck, feeling the wayward brush of damp hair.
"You came for me at your own expense, Commander. I thank you for that. For saving me, and for being vigilant in keeping us safe."
There was a slight shift in their feet as the human rocked to lean on her synthetic leg, clearing her throat again.
"Just doing my job, Dr. T'Soni," Shepard mumbled gruffly. "You don't need to thank me every time. You helped at your own expense too. So... You know... It was all you. I should be thanking you. So, yeah, you know, thank you. You did... Good. Uh, I know it wasn't a good situation for you, though, but, well, yeah."
Liara smiled to herself. "If only she worried less about how she comforts, and know in her heart that it's the act itself that's appreciated. But... She really does not enjoy attention on herself, does she? A 'lone wolf' through and through, as she proclaimed that night after the museum. But does she want to be one, or forced to be one?"
With the snippets of observation and implied facts hidden in silence, the archaeologist leaned on the latter. She herself had somewhat leaned on the latter, or so she was beginning to learn through introspection herself, due to these little moments between them. Her smile grew when the edge of the thumb that traced circles around her elbow had gradually recruited more fingers to massage her elbow instead.
And then a draft from the window ruined it all.
Liara was painfully reminded of the embarrassing state she was in, and within seconds, she had disappeared to charge up the stairs and to the bathroom, clinging onto her towel for dear life. This time, she remembered one of her many new mental notes and locked the bathroom. She swore she could feel the confusion outside and rose her voice.
"Sorry, I'll be out in a few minutes after my shower!"
What a cursed time to be reminded. They were doing so good, Shepard was doing so good, not running away, slowly thawing from her fossilized form. She had opened up about her scars.
Maybe, with time, with encouragement and patience and a nurturing environment, maybe she would talk about what happened to her arm and leg. Maybe her nonchalance of handling her synthetic limbs would one day extend to her nonchalance of talking about them in a meaningful way, rather than this droning dance of theirs regarding mechanical specifications.
With resolve once again renewed, the archaeologist tackled the shower with the intention of making it out in record time. Blissful warm water changed her mind in record time instead. Her body melted in ways she hadn't known she had tensed herself. She adjusted the angle of the shower head before she rested her forehead against the tiled wall. Her bliss didn't last long.
A beep at the door indicated someone tried to enter, and that confused tone became too much to bear.
"Dr. T'Soni, is everything okay? Why is the door locked? Are you hiding from me?"
"If only she truly heard her own questions. Speculation alone would be answer enough."
Liara's cheeks warmed as she contemplated how to respond. Blunt and honest? Or roundabout politeness? It all depended on what she had the courage for, which was to not answer at all, honestly, but she suspected that would carry dire consequences with it.
Like now, as she observed her door wrenched open a sliver with the lock somehow turning off, and cybernetic fingers wrapped around the edge to manually overload the sliding mechanism. Shepard stood there with a frown as if asking "how dare she."
And the only answer Liara could come up with was: "Take a hint!"
"What hint?" Shepard crossed her arms, her frown deepening. "You didn't answer me."
"You didn't give me time to think of one!"
"Shouldn't have to, unless you didn't know why you locked it, which is all you would have to say."
Liara groaned as she turned away in the shower, covering her breasts with her arms.
"Commander, just... Please leave. I'm not comfortable like this."
"Not comfortable? Why? It's just me. I haven't been treating you like a subordinate, so me being a commanding officer shouldn't be an issue."
Footsteps neared. This woman had disabled herself to the concept of taking hints. Shepard also had no concept of privacy, with the way she so brusquely rapped her knuckles on the glass door.
"What are you doing in there?"
"Taking a shower," Liara forced the wry answer through clenched teeth.
All she wanted to do was scream.
The soldier lightly scoffed with her words. "Well, I can see that."
"But you can't see me trying to cover myself and hide from you?"
"Are you injured, and you don't want me to see it?" Shepard pressed. "Did Dr. Chakwas see it at least?"
The glass door sounded like it was being opened, and it panicked Liara. She whirled around and her fingers latched onto the handle, not above employing her biotics to ascertain that she had the advantage of strength, in case the soldier was using her cybernetics again. Shepard's brow pinched, and for the first time, concern was easier to decipher on her expression.
"Dr. T'Soni, please open this door. I want to make sure you're alright."
"You can see that through the glass door, can't you? I promise you I am fine."
This couldn't be happening. This was just like those gaudy movies her friends used to drag her to, forcing her to sit through the most banal of all scenes before the couple had spontaneous sex - with absolutely no rhyme or reason to actually lead up to it, to top it off.
"Oh, Goddess, what if this is her way of confessing? Is she so shut off from emotion that she partakes in the act just as casually?"
Shepard took off her sunglasses, scrutinizing. But then she seemed to make a pointed gesture with her eyes several times. They would gloss over the archaeologist's shoulder and then swivel up to the shower head. The soldier placed a finger on her lips and overpowered with her hold on the glass door, sliding it open as quietly as possible before she stepped in and adjusted the shower head to aim a bit away.
Then she left.
"What... On Thessia... Wait. Do I even want to ask?"
Liara was left stumped. She glanced up at the shower head, then turned off the water. She was hesitant coming out of the stall, but there was nothing left to even hide at this point, and she was trying to ignore the disappointment swelling up within her. Whatever the Commander has just figured out seemed to be a threat of some sort, or a security issue.
But a shower head? Didn't she take a shower earlier, or did she only step in there after whatever instincts of hers had flagged a break in? Her shower was remarkably quick.
"Why did she let me take one?" The archaeologist deflated with mortification, feeling as if the whole galaxy has seen her now. "She at least could've warned me if she suspected something..."
Liara dried herself off before she wrapped the towel around her and poked her head out the bathroom, her surprised yelp muffled by a hand shooting over her mouth with Shepard standing right there. The lights in the apartment were off, with only the morning light illuminating slivers of the living room. Liara stiffened when the soldier leaned over, her warm breathy whisper pattering over the aural.
"Act casual and don't react to what I'm about to say."
Yes. Okay. This right here? The way they were positioned right now? This wasn't quite casual or something Liara could stop herself from reacting to.
"Someone broke in. They're watching us now, through cameras. I've found the main link and hacked into their system."
But... But a shower head?
"What information could they possibly gain?"
It took a minute before a more concerning question smacked her.
"Oh, Goddess. She hacked into their system." Liara internally sighed. "There was no point covering myself, then."
"They haven't detected me yet," Shepard continued, "But I'm not familiar with their firewalls so I have to log out soon. In the mean time, pretend everything is normal and absolutely do not try to look for more cameras. Get ready as you usually would, and we will leave for the university. I will check in with the crew again at Benezia's estate and see if I can have someone escort Tali - if she is free - to come in here and disable everything, then update your security. We must be getting close somewhere if they've felt threatened enough to do this. They chose strange spots for their cameras, though..."
The soldier finally released her hold on Liara's mouth and went over to the bedroom. She seemed to stand somewhat specifically in front of the dresser. Liara's cheeks warmed with embarrassment as she slowly approached, feeling more self-conscious by the way confused eyes landed on her.
"I need to grab my clothes, Commander," Liara murmured. "Do you mind turning around while I change?"
"Turn around? What for?"
This woman just had zero concept of privacy. There was no way someone could be this oblivious about it all, though, but the demeanour was an ominous sign of the military life that awaited Liara, back on the Normandy. Maybe this was what Shepard was talking about when she had warned that civilians would have difficulty adjusting aboard the ship.
"Dr. T'Soni?"
For a moment, Liara swore she heard soft concern in that tone, until she realized she had spaced out without answering. She'd be concerned too. She simply grabbed the soldier's shoulders and twisted as a hint to turn in that direction, while she squeezed behind to grab the outfit she'd prepared on top of her dresser. Her silent request was shattered the moment Shepard glanced behind her out of curiosity.
"Are you uncomfortable around me, Liara?"
Her heart leapt as soon as she heard. The logical part of her chastised her overly aggressive eagerness and recent tendency to read too much into things, but she just couldn't help it. The question threw her into a paradox, where yes, she was uncomfortable, but hearing that rare tender passing of her name - however awkward it rolled off the soldier's tongue - was making her completely consider otherwise. Whatever she was doing, she needed to do more of it to get more practice out of her name, and not her doctorate.
A tentative hand rested on her shoulder.
Liara forced herself to turn away and, before she dropped her towel, she mustered the courage to confess.
"I do not change around others often. Ever, really. The last time was probably when I was studying in Serrice. So... I'm uncomfortable. I was hoping to have privacy."
"Oh."
Shepard shifted then made it obvious where not to do the changing as she had grabbed the archaeologist's wrist and dragged her right back into the bathroom. As soon as they were in relative privacy there, the soldier turned around to look away.
"I'm not saying this to disrespect you, Dr. T'Soni, but I must warn you then: you will definitely have difficulty on the Normandy then. Everybody suits up together on missions. Our showers don't have privacy panes and there is always someone using them, no matter the shift rotation. Our locker rooms... Well. You may need to start mentally preparing yourself in advance that you will no longer have the privacy you want. And your privacy has been violated here by whomever is watching those cameras."
"I know," Liara sighed, shrinking in her skin over the terrible reminder. "I gathered as much, with how you seem comfortable with... Lack thereof."
She was grateful when the soldier turned away and felt more at ease to relinquish her towel, trying to ignore the awkwardness she felt as she suddenly seemed to stumble about with donning her clothes. She smiled when Shepard cleared her throat - there seemed to be some effort invested in trying to make it quiet, and ultimately failing.
"I realize you are not comfortable with me, but I wager you'd be more comfortable with me than a crew mate you don't yet know. We could plan for a time where I will be with you. If there's a crowd and it overwhelms you, I can clear out the stalls so that it's just us two. Is that a satisfactory compromise, Dr. T'Soni?"
With a welcomed set of clothes cloaking her self-consciousness, Liara came up to the soldier's side with a more ready smile.
"I would appreciate that, Commander. So long as it's truly no trouble for you. I can adapt."
"No." Another noisy clear of the throat. "Not that I'm saying you can't adapt, I mean. No trouble is... What I meant... Yeah." Shepard glanced over. "I apologize, Dr. T'Soni. How to fight is all I really know. I'll do my best to accommodate your needs, within reason, but I admit I'm out of my depth here. The only experience I have is when I was the officer in charge of the barracks, but for human Alliance personnel. So just be honest with me if you run into an issue and we'll brainstorm what we can do, okay? You work on what you can to adapt at the pace you need to, and I'll work on the rest." The soldier gestured towards the railing. "Are you ready to leave now?"
With a final look around her place, Liara nodded. She had a dreadful feeling she couldn't shake off now that she'd learned that there were cameras stationed in here, and a sense of paranoia. Even if this 'Tali' disabled all of them, who was to say it wouldn't happen again? Who was to say Tali would even get every single camera? Were her clothes and possessions now classified as forensic evidence, to be combed through for intel?
"Goddess, I hope not. I don't need my equipment destroyed or my clothes picked apart by strangers."
Liara trudged on behind the stout soldier, wondering if Shepard would truly accept them returning here despite this major security risk. Clearly, anyone can hack into the archaeologist's apartment, be it a novice or a professional. She wondered which of the two Shepard was.
"It seems she has a broad skillset, knowing a little about everything. Or at least, who am I to say how much she knows? I suppose this is why she was made Spectre."
When they left the apartment, Liara had almost forgotten to lock it.
"Is there a point?"
There seemed to be, with the way the soldier lingered by it. She slipped on her sunglasses and immediately moved the second the password was punched in and the door was locked.
"They can't find out that we know," Shepard explained, as if sensing the question and hesitation. "We will return to the Normandy first, before we go to your university. I want the marines to clear the sky-car we'll hail and make sure there aren't any bugs in there, if the hacker is watching us and also able to program which one responds." She fished in her pocket and retrieved some kind of elastic, tying up her damp hair. "I want to retrieve some gear as well."
Panic twisted in the archaeologist's gut as imagination ran wild with what kind of gear would be taken.
"The University of Serrice has strict policies in place, Commander. It's to ensure that it remains a place of learning."
"I'm sure they can make an exception. I also want to make sure that it remains as a place of learning, and the only way I can do that is if I'm adequately prepared if we're followed in there - worse yet, ambushed if we stumble on something they don't want us to know."
"B-but firearms..."
"I won't need one." Shepard settled in her rigid military posture when they entered the elevator, already full-business mode. "Well, more like: there's a likelihood that the agents here are more asari, just like at Benezia's estate. Their biotics puts me at a disadvantage, so I need to tip the scales. Even if your university has a scanner upon entry, we'll be fine and I won't be detected."
"They do." Liara's brow pinched in confusion. "So how will you hide... Whatever weapons you're taking?"
The corner of the soldier's mouth twitched in a slight smile, but her stoic tone still carried the tiniest hints of something else - nothing good.
"There's an advantage to being half-synthetic, as you'll find out soon, Dr. T'Soni."
End Notes
For anyone who's happen to read "Frozen Embers" by No Pen No Gain, the shower head camera is a reference to that story with what Hale says about Tali. I couldn't help myself lol. Also highly recommend "Frozen Embers" and give Hale a shot, it's a brilliant story and easily 10x better than mine, full of action and an emotional rollercoaster. You'll find yourself smiling with every chapter!
Anyways, see you in chapter 9, hope you enjoyed this one!