Kirei felt the spice of the mapo tofu bubble on this tongue, the heat burning the entirety of the priest's mouth. The volcanic flavor was all-encompassing, every one of Kirei's senses besides taste deactivating so he could fully comprehend the sheer potency of the tofu's existence. The taste was so complex, and yet each facet of it came together to form a rainbow rather than the chaotic mess it risked becoming if any aspect of the dish was slightly off balance. Kirei swallowed, the star traveling down his throat and giving it a coating of flames. A meltdown was occurring in the nuclear reactor that was Kirei's body, sweat drenching him to try and keep him cool. Every breath was an exhalation of dragon fire. The priest had to open his collar to assist in lowering his body temperature. Kirei watched the restaurant spin as he was overcome with heat syncope.
"Splendid." Kirei said with a smile on his wrinkled face. He was almost sixty, though he looked relatively good for his age which Kirei attributed both to the fact that he regularly exercised and that he ate mapo tofu. His hair was gray, nearly white, but he was relatively fit if you ignored the pops and cracks his body made every time he stood up. "You've ascended to yet another level of culinary mastery. Rejoice, young Caren."
"I'm not 'young Caren' anymore." Caren stood next to Kirei's table in Koushuuensaikan Taizan. She was the spitting image of Claudia, though Claudia never wore a qipao nor was her hair ever so boyishly short. Caren was the current head chef of Koushuuensaikan Taizan. Every day she got to serve people food that she always made a bit spicier than what they ordered so she could enjoy their pain. It was paradise for her. "It's no fun watching you eat my cooking since you like it."
"That's a statement that no other chef can relate to." Kirei ate another spoonful of mapo tofu, the spice taking him once more.
"Whatever, just keep your moaning to a minimum. You'll scare away my customers." Caren returned to the kitchen and Kirei kept eating, slowly, methodically. Every bite needed to be appreciated on its own. To not savor such a supper would be a sin.
This was the life. Kirei got to eat mapo tofu whenever he wanted, though that was no different than two decades ago. He was still acting as a priest at the now rebuilt Fuyuki Church while occasionally going on missions as an Executor. Kirei was still living as he had after the Fourth Holy Grail War. The one major difference that came about after the fifth was that Kirei was the only resident of his church now, his wards all having moved out. It was nice and peaceful, though sometimes Kirei reminisced about when Rin, Sakura, and Caren were growing up and how raucous things could get because of them. The priest wasn't sure why he thought about those bygone days as often as he did.
Kirei was satisfied after finishing off his fifth serving of mapo tofu, so he took out his wallet and put the money for the meal on the table. One might think Caren would give her father a discount or even let him eat free since they were family. Instead she made Kirei pay double. The priest got up from his seat while Caren was on her way to give a group of people at another table their food.
"Thank you for the m-"
The priest's leg gave out as he tried to stand up quickly. He was on a collision course with the floor.
Plates shattered and spicy sauces smeared across the ground.
Kirei's body hung above the floor as he was held by the arm. He was pulled onto his feet, a hand going onto his shoulder to make sure he wasn't going to drop again.
Caren had dropped the food she was carrying to catch Kirei. The other patrons of the restaurant were looking at the father and daughter, as well as the mess on the floor.
"Why did you save me?" Kirei assumed Caren would want to let him fall so she could enjoy his pain.
"Don't think about it." Caren released her father and snatched the money off the table before walking away. "Now I have to clean this mess and make the food again."
Caren didn't want Kirei to get hurt, more so than she wanted to relish in his pain. She felt affection for her father, or at least concern for him. There was no religious or moral motivation behind Caren's actions, only genuine feeling. Despite her hard exterior, Caren was able to be genuinely kind when it mattered most, and that meant she wasn't cursed in the same way Kirei was. She was able to live a proper life where she didn't indulge in her dark impulses too much and still be happy. Kirei was concerned when Caren was young over how she would turn out, but she ended up fine. As a father, there was nothing else he needed than for his children to be living safe, moral, and pleasant lives.
Kirei considered thanking Caren, but he was sure that even saying goodbye to her would lead to verbal barbs born from embarrassment from her. Instead the priest just left the restaurant without another word, a smile on his face for reasons he couldn't discern.
The nighttime chill nipped at Kirei's ears and nose. Fuyuki's night sky was starved for stars due to light pollution. There weren't many people in the shopping district. Anyone out on the town after dark would be in Shinto. Kirei made his way through the quiet town, his arms behind his back.
It was an uneventful walk until certain words reached Kirei's ears.
"Just come one. It'll be great. I promise I've got a nice big one."
"No, thank you."
"Do you gotta be such a bitch? Just let us have fun."
"Why are you guys even asking her? Just hold her down."
It didn't take much detective work to deduce that there was a woman being accosted by multiple men in the nearby alley. It was something that the priest had to stop.
Kirei ran into the alley and found a young woman with brown hair in a pair of braids that reached down to her ankles. Her eyes were yellow and she had three pink dots on her forehead. She wore a golden necklace and a puffy pink and white jacket.
It was just as one of the three men surrounding the woman moved in to grab her that she slammed her palm into his torso so hard he went flying back into the wall behind him. The man hit the ground, writhing in pain. The two other men responded in different ways to the sight of their ally being incapacitated in a single blow. One tried to run away while the other punched at the woman. The fist was deflected and the woman grabbed the attacking man's collar before punching him three times in the face so fast that none of the strikes would have been perceptible to a normal human's eyes. The attacker slumped to the ground while the fleeing man was heading in Kirei's direction. The priest needed only a single elbow strike to make the man drop. With all three ne'er-do-wells trounced, the young woman spoke.
"Hello, Father Kirei. Funny seeing you here."
"Hello, Ms. Sessyoin. What are you doing in Fuyuki?"
"I was handling a mission in a town nearby that I completed just yesterday. I figured I'd come visit you and Sakura before I went back to the Clock Tower." Ms. Sessyoin put a hand on her cheek as she gazed upon her defeated assailants. "Then these three men appeared and decided to try and have their way with me. Why do I attract so much attention?"
"A face and figure considered attractive by conventional standards will do that. Is Rin in town?"
"No, she's in London. This was a solo mission for me that was meant to be a test. I faced a man who could use humanity's original language to manipulate people. It was one of the most challenging tasks I've ever faced."
Kirei wondered where Rin learned to be such a hard mentor, sending her apprentice on life or death tasks that caused her to engage with powerful magi. The priest went rather easy on Rin and Sakura when teaching them magecraft and martial arts. Perhaps it was just Rin's way.
Ms. Sessyoin called the authorities and they came to pick up the three hooligans. After giving a report of what happened, the police left with the trio while Kirei and Ms. Sessyoin left for Sakura's home, the Tohsaka mansion.
"They know you're coming, yes?" Kirei noticed it was almost midnight. It took a long time for the authorities to arrive.
"I texted Sakura. I wouldn't want to appear unannounced, especially not this late. We agreed we'd have a little late night snack together."
"On a weekday?"
"She said she was fine with it." Ms. Sessyoin's smile and half-lidded eyes never changed.
Kirei and Ms. Sessyoin arrived at the Tohsaka mansion. There was no light peeking through the windows and the curtains were all closed.
"Are you sure they're expecting you?" Kirei couldn't find any traces that anyone was awake on the premises.
"I'm as sure as can be." Ms. Sessyoin tapped on the bars of the front gate, making contact with the Bounded Field to get Sakura's attention.
A light turned on and a curtain peeled open slightly, someone looking out at Kirei and Ms. Sessyoin. The curtain closed again and there was a brief wait before the front door of the mansion opened to reveal Sakura in a pink nightgown, her waist length hair uncombed and her eyes squinting. She ran over to the front gate.
"Kirei, Kiara, why are you here? Abzug Bedienung Mittelstand." Sakura took down the Bounded Field and opened the gate. "Is something wrong?"
"No, I'm here to visit." The gears in Ms. Sessyoin's head finally began to turn. "We talked about it earlier, right? I texted you."
"I don't remember that." Sakura manipulated the key to the gate that was in her hands, moving it around aimlessly as she thought. "Are you sure you texted me?"
"I'm pretty sure." Ms. Sessyoin pulled out her phone which she had previously neglected to check. A few taps and she was scrolling through her text history with Sakura. Lo and behold, there was no recent conversation about coming to visit. "I swore we talked about this. I remember it so vividly."
"Are you sure you aren't thinking about the last time you came to visit?" Sakura said. "You texted me that time and you came to visit us late at night."
Ms. Sessyoin became like a statue as she was struck with realization.
"Oh."
Kirei rubbed his eye as he was faced with just how airheaded Rin's apprentice was. This was not new information, but that didn't make the individual instances of Ms. Sessyoin's scatterbrained behavior less frustrating.
"Kiara." Sakura had a weary smile on her face. "You really need to start writing notes or something to keep track of these kinds of things."
"I tried that, but I always forgot to look back at the notes." Kiara's face finally became anything besides a smile, that being frown.
"Perhaps you should see a doctor if your memory is really that bad. Moving on, do you want to come in? Shirou and I are awake now and we're probably not going to be able to go back to sleep any time soon."
"Would that be okay?" Kiara clasped her hands together.
"At this point, it would make you coming all this way meaningless if we told you to leave. Kirei, do you want to come in too?"
"I might as well." The priest would have preferred to go home and sleep, but he didn't want to walk all the way back to the church and there was a high chance that Sakura would ask him to stay the night so he wouldn't have to.
"Follow me then." Sakura led Kirei and the airhead into the mansion. Right at the door they were met with a man with short red hair wearing a white t-shirt and black sweatpants. Sakura gave a quick explanation to him about what was going on.
"So that's what happened. It is what it is." The man extended his hand to Ms. Sessyoin who shook it. "It's good to see you, Kiara."
"It's good to see you too."
The man looked at Kirei and glared at him before offering his hand. The priest shook it as well.
"Hello, Kirei."
"It's good to see you, Shirou." Kirei and Sakura's husband had never gotten along. It wasn't that there was anything that happened between then to instigate this distaste they held for each other, it was instinctual. There was something fundamentally incompatible about the two men that made it impossible for them like each other. They decided to avoid interacting with each other as much as possible whilst attempting to remain cordial around Sakura.
"I'll go brew some tea." Shirou said before heading towards the kitchen.
Sakura led her guests into the living room. It resembled how it looked two decades ago, with fancy European chairs, tables, and bookshelves, and a grandfather clock in the corner, though now there were some modern additions like a flat screen television mounted on the wall. Kirei and Ms. Sessyoin sat down in chairs while Sakura took a seat on the couch.
"It's honestly nice having some unexpected guests. Things have been a little monotonous lately." Sakura put her hands on her knees. "Not having little Kirei around has made things a lot quieter."
"How's he been enjoying Africa?" Kiara said.
"He's been loving it. He's been on his best behavior and he calls us all the time to tell us about the things he's learned and the experiences he's had. Little Kirei's so cute when he gets excited." Sakura and Shirou had named the eldest of their three sons after Sakura's adoptive father. The young man had been rather rebellious recently, but he jumped at the opportunity to study abroad. Perhaps his acting out was because he felt antsy having spent almost his entire life in one city. "He did break his glasses the other day, but he managed to tape them back together. I'm still worried so we might send him a new pair, but he told us not to."
"He probably doesn't want to rely on you right now. Him traveling has been an opportunity for him to be more self-reliant. It's a chance for him to figure out who he is when he isn't a part of your family." Ms. Sessyoin's analysis sounded believable. Despite her airheadedness, she was the most perceptive person Kirei knew at times.
"You're probably right." Sakura stretched her arms and let out a little groan. "I still want to help him though."
"How's Hiro and Ritsu?"
"Hiro's the same as usual. He'll be head of the archery club next year, though that's assuming he doesn't get cocky and make a big mistake."
"He does that rather often." Kirei said. Hiro was a cheerful lad, but he was prideful in the same way Rin was, and just like her, he was prone to stumbling at the last moment.
"Ritsu's been okay and he's transitioned from kindergarten to first grade pretty well, though he's really antisocial. We don't want to immediately panic like I know a lot of other parent's do when their child isn't immediately making a lot of friends at school, but I'm still a little uneasy. It's okay if he's a bit reclusive, I just hope he isn't completely averse to being around anyone who isn't a part of our family."
"It's a reasonable concern to have. Like you said, there's no need to go to extremes, but if it really seems like he's having long term problems interacting with new people, then it might be worth meeting with doctors and therapists." Kiara's tone was empathetic and clinical.
Kiara was a wise woman who could read people like a book and find solutions to their problems. She had a disposition befitting someone in the medical field, especially due to her capacity for compassion. Rin had chosen a good student, and Rin herself was someone who had more than lived up to her father's expectations. She had turned the Tohsakas from a family best known for having a large number of patents and for having provided the land necessary for an obscure ritual, to a household name among magi that would forever be respected, envied, and admired. Even after all that she had managed, Rin still worked to achieve ever greater heights. Kirei was proud to have been her teacher.
Shirou walked into the room with a tray covered in cups filled with green tea and a bowl of homemade rice crackers. He served everyone their drinks and sat down next to his wife.
"Thank you." Ms. Sessyoin took a sip of her tea. "Is the restaurant doing well?"
"It's as great as ever. The only problem is that we get so many customers now that we don't have enough tables." Shirou had an innocent smile. He was the owner and head chef of his own restaurant that had become quite popular. The man had always loved cooking and he had a talent for it. In contrast to Kirei, Shirou felt great joy at other people's happiness, he was similar to Kiara in that way. He was loving, giving, and would go to any length to safeguard his family. Sakura had made a smart choice in picking Shirou. After being stuck with trauma that wet the palette of Kirei's sadistic side every time he thought about it, Sakura was now living the plain life she always desired. She had a husband who loved her and children she could dote on, and she had become a fair bit more assertive. Just like with Caren and Rin, Kirei was proud of Sakura.
Kirei was feeling that inexplicable emotion again. What was it? There was a potential answer that kept creeping into Kirei's mind, but he knew that couldn't be it for it was fundamentally antithetical to his nature.
The unnamed emotion kept bothering Kirei as the conversation continued. Eventually the discussion died down as everyone got tired, or more tired than they already were. It was time to turn in for the night and Sakura offered to let Kirei and Ms. Sessyoin stay in their guest rooms.
"We still have an extra set of clothes for you from the last time you stayed the night." Sakura said as she brought Kirei to his room.
"Thank you, Sakura. Sleep well."
"Goodnight." Sakura said before walking away.
Upon entering his room, Kirei went and sat on the side of the bed.
What was he feeling? This emotion occurred when he thought about his children. The obvious implication was that he was feeling paternal love for the girls he raised, but the priest was incapable of that. He wasn't able to feel affection, only the desire to cause human suffering. Even when Claudia took her life and when Kirei found his father slain, the only thing running through the broken man's mind in those moments was how he wished he had been the one to kill them. How could any man who was so inhumane, so horrible that his thoughts could make the Devil himself wretch, feel love?
Was love antithetical to Kirei's nature? The priest could feel joy only from human pain, but were love and joy nested subjects? It was impossible that they could be mutually exclusive. Perhaps it was in some way related to the instinct within Kirei to reject his nature? The fact he was capable of resisting his urges implies that there was a degree of complexity to his mental structure. He had morals that could overpower his urges. Was it through rejecting his dark nature that Kirei was able to cultivate normal emotions?
Perhaps Kirei wasn't feeling love and it was just that he had become such a skilled pretender at being normal that he had constructed false emotions. The love inside the priest was just a simulacrum used so he could better act the part of a righteous human. Or maybe it was real. Did it matter? Ultimately, it was the actions people took that mattered, not their thoughts, for it was action that altered the world. Of course there were curses which could harm people using one's thoughts, but that was getting off topic.
In the end, what was inside Kirei didn't matter. He was living his life as a true human who had managed to make those around him happy. He helped save the world from Avenger and raised his daughters into fine adults who loved him and who he potentially loved back.
Kirei remembered Claudia. She always said Kirei was capable of love, and it turned out that maybe she had been correct. If Kirei really was feeling love now, why couldn't he love his wife? Perhaps he could have learned to if she hadn't passed away so soon.
Why did Claudia have to be so extreme? Why did she need to take her own life? If Claudia hadn't taken her own life, would she have survived long enough for Kirei to learn Spiritual Healing? Would his Spiritual Healing have been enough to cure Claudia? If he had been motivated, could Kirei have summoned a Servant with the ability to heal Claudia in the Fourth War? There was nothing to be achieved by thinking of what-ifs.
The world was in one piece and Kirei's family was happy. What more could the priest ask for?
Kirei got undressed, kneeled beside his bed and said a prayer, before slipping under the covers and closing his eyes.
He fell asleep quickly, ending yet another simple day of earned peace.
000
This is the end of the story. Writing this has taken a little over a year. It feels like it's been far longer and far shorter at the same time. I hoped you liked this series and this ending.
Stay tuned. I'm going to post at least one more chapter that's not really a chapter, but an update on my future plans, a reflection on the process of writing this series, ideas that I didn't go with, what I think I did right and wrong, and a presentation of some ideas I have for my potential next fanfiction which you all can give your thoughts on.
Any constructive criticism is encouraged and appreciated.
Thank you for reading, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this chapter and this series as a whole, and I hope you check out my reflection chapter, and my next series.