Even Hermione was surprised at the animosity by almost everyone in the school not wearing the maroon and gold of Gryffindor (and even a few of them from their house, Ron included). The Hufflepuffs, who were usually on excellent terms with the Gryffindors, had turned remarkably cold towards the lot of them. One Herbology lesson was enough to demonstrate this. It was plain that the Hufflepuffs felt that Harry had stolen their champion's glory; a feeling exacerbated, perhaps, by the fact that the Hufflepuff house very rarely got any glory, and that Cedric was one of the few who had ever given them any, having beaten Gryffindor once at Quidditch. Ernie Macmillan and Justin Finch-Fletchley went out of their way to actively ignore Harry during class.
If that wasn't bad enough, Ron wasn't talking to Harry either. Hermione was in absolute agony. She was determined to make them both realise how immature they were both being. She was positioned between them in the Greenhouse and tried to get them to talk.
"Ron, do you remember those Omnioculars we had at the Quidditch World Cup?" she asked.
"Yes."
"What was your favourite function on them?"
"I dunno."
"Harry, how about you?" Hermione asked desperately.
"I dunno."
Hermione sighed and tried to think of another topic. "Hey, you two never told me what exactly happened at the Dursley's house? What did Fred and George do to Dudley?" Neither boy said a word. "Ron?"
"I don't remember."
Hermione rolled her eyes. "Fine. Harry?"
Harry just shook his head.
"Honestly, you two," Hermione said exasperatedly and counted down the minutes until the end of Herbology, not remembering what class was next: Care of Magical Creatures with the Slytherins.
As soon as Hermione remembered who they'd be spending the next hour or so with, she was filled with dread. As poorly as the Hufflepuffs were treating them, the Slytherins would be much, much worse.
With a sigh, she followed Ron to Hagrid's hut, with Harry walking slowly behind them.
"Ah, look, boys, it's the champion," Malfoy said to Crabbe and Goyle. "Got your autograph books? Better get a signature now, because I doubt he's going to be around much longer; half the Triwizard champions have died. How long d'you reckon you're going to last, Potter? Ten minutes into the first task's my bet."
Crabbe and Goyle guffawed sycophantically, but Malfoy had to stop there because Hagrid emerged from the back of his cabin. He was holding a teetering tower of crates, each containing a very large Blast-Ended Skrewt. To the class's horror, Hagrid explained that the reason the Skrewts had been killing each other was an excess of pent-up energy, and that the solution would be for each student to fix a leash on a Skrewt and take it for a short walk. The only good thing about this plan was that it distracted Malfoy completely.
"Take this thing for a walk?" he repeated in disgust, staring into one of the boxes. "And where exactly are we supposed to fix the leash? Around the sting, the blasting end or the sucker?"
"Roun' the middle," said Hagrid, demonstrating. "Er – yeh might want ter put on yer dragon-hide gloves, jus' as an extra precaution, like. Harry – you come here an' help me with this big one."
Hermione watched as Hagrid led Harry away from the group, probably to ask for himself whether or not Harry put his name in the Goblet.
"S'probably gonna get automatic A's, too," Ron mumbled. "On account of him being a Champion and all."
"Ron, come off it!" Hermione said. "Honestly, Ronald. You're not thinking this through."
"I most certainly am," Ron retorted.
Hermione ensured they were far enough away from the group to avoid being overheard. "Why on earth would Harry choose to participate in potentially deadly tasks?"
"Uh, because he's Harry Potter, and that's what he does?" Ron said, his words dripping with sarcasm. "'The Boy Who Lived?' Ring a bell?"
"Ron-"
"Think about it, Hermione," Ron continued. "He just had to go searching for the Philosopher's Stone and save the day during our first year. Then, in our second year, he just had to follow those damned spiders to find the Chamber of Secrets. And last year, he had to go after a-" Ron dropped his voice to a whisper despite the closest students to them being far out of earshot, "-a convicted mass murderer… and then attacked a teacher to set the murderer free!"
"You know perfectly well that-"
"What? That Harry constantly meddles? That Harry always has to be the centre of attention? The hero?"
"You don't mean that."
"I do, too."
Hermione gave an exasperated sigh and walked away. There was no reasoning with Ron when he was like this. She returned to minding the lesson, and keeping an eye on Harry and Hagrid. The Skrewts were now over three feet long and extremely powerful. No longer shell-less and colourless, they had developed a kind of thick, greyish, shiny armour. They looked like a cross between giant scorpions and elongated crabs, but still without recognisable heads or eyes. They had become immensely strong and difficult to control.
With an alarming 'bang,' one of the Skrewts' ends would explode, causing it to shoot forward several yards. Hermione looked over and saw a student being dragged along on their stomach, trying desperately to get back on their feet. This class was descending into insanity, and Hermione could only hope the remaining minutes would tick by quickly.
It turned out the Blast-Ended Skrewts were the week's highlight, because things only went downhill from there. Harry and Ron were still not speaking, and Hermione felt caught in the middle of their quarrel. The Hufflepuffs were absolutely dreadful to any Gryffindor, but specifically made a point to be particularly horrendous to Hermione and Harry. The Slytherins' attitudes were to be expected, but Hermione was surprised at the vitriol being spewed by the Ravenclaws. Most of them seemed to think that he had been desperate to earn himself a bit more fame by tricking the Goblet into accepting his name.
Hermione also noticed Cedric seemed to be attracting most of the female Hogwarts population with his dark hair and handsome physique. Many of the same sixth-year girls who had been so keen to get Viktor Krum's autograph were now begging Cedric to sign their school bags. Harry involuntarily tried to smooth out his hair whenever they were in the same room together. He seemed as insecure about his looks as Hermione was.
Classes were still keeping them all busy, but Hermione was wondering when she'd have her extra lessons with Professor Flitwick so she could help Jillian with her cochlear implant. As she and Harry entered the Charms classroom that Friday morning, Professor Flitwick approached Hermione.
"Miss Granger!" he said with a side eye towards Harry that Hermione questioned for a second before realising Professor Flitwick was the Ravenclaw Head of House and probably shared some of the same views. "I was wondering if you'd be available this weekend for our extra charms sessions."
"Oh yes!" Hermione said with a smile.
"Excellent! I will send you a note with the time then."
"Perfect," Hermione said. "Thank you, Professor!"
He walked back towards the front of the class and climbed onto his raised podium to start class.
"Good morning, class," he said. "Today's lesson will begin our training of the Summoning Charm. Now, can anyone tell me anything about the Summoning Charm?"
Hermione's hand shot up.
"Yes, Miss Granger?"
"The Summoning Charm is a charm that summons an object towards the caster," she read from the picture of the textbook in her mind. "It can summon things both in and out of sight of the caster, as long as the caster has a clear picture of the item in their mind."
"Correct, as usual, Miss Granger. Now, can anyone tell me what the incantation is?"
Hermione's hand shot up again, but so did Parvati's.
"Yes, Miss Patil?"
"Accio," Parvati said with a pointed smile at Hermione. Hermione frowned. Was Parvati trying to be rude?
"Excellent," Professor Flitwick said. "And can anyone demonstrate the wand motion?"
Both Hermione and Parvati raised their hands in the same instant. Hermione caught Parvati looking at her out of the corner of her eye like she was trying to race Hermione to the answer.
"How about you both demonstrate at the same time?" Professor Flitwick said.
The roommates each made an arch with their wands.
"Splendid, splendid," said Professor Flitwick, repeating the motion for the class. "A few more things to note: The Summoning Charm cannot be used on buildings. In addition, it does not work on living things, although they might be moved indirectly by summoning things they are wearing or holding. That is undoubtedly a hazardous thing to try, though, since the summoned items will travel close to the speed of light, and the living thing may be injured in the process.
"Additionally, it is important to know that the further the desired object is from the caster, the harder it is to summon. The caster should know the general location of the item to summon it as well, meaning you can't just say, 'Accio Ravenclaw's Diadem' and have it come to you since no one knows where it is hidden. Understand?"
The class all nodded, finishing up their notes.
"Brilliant. Once you are done with your notes, we will begin the lesson's practical application. As I have learned from years of teaching fourth years this charm, in this lesson we will practise the spell one student at a time at first, so we don't have to dodge 30 different items flying about the classroom. Also, a word to the wise: start small. If you try to Summon something large, like my desk, remember it will come flying at you at the speed of light. Madam Pomfrey would rather like to be free this afternoon instead of in the hospital wing taking care of overachieving Charms students."
One by one, each of the students tried the spell. Seamus Finnigan attempted to summon a piece of paper from Professor Flitwick's desk, but it slid off the edge to the floor. Hermione did not know what Dean Thomas was trying to summon because nothing moved.
Hermione spent the next few minutes before her turn trying to decide what to summon. She didn't want to try to summon something too big and fail, but she wanted to test her limits. Finally, it was her turn, and Hermione focused on the board duster. With a flick of her wrist in an arc shape, Hermione stared at the duster and said, "Accio board duster," as forcefully as she could. With a blink of an eye, the board duster flew towards Hermione, landing neatly on the desk in front of her.
"Oh, bravo, Miss Granger," said Professor Flitwick.
Next up was Harry. Hermione watched him screw up his eyes and perform the wand action. Nothing happened. He tried again. Nothing. She could see the frustration behind his eyes as he slumped back in his chair.
The rest of the class practised their spells one at a time to mixed success. After everyone had tried at least once, Professor Flitwick set them off to work independently. By the end of class, almost everyone had, at the very least, successfully got something to move slightly… except for Neville and Harry. Professor Flitwick assigned them both extra homework, and Harry looked utterly despondent.
"It's not really that difficult, Harry," Hermione reassured him as they left Flitwick's class. "You just weren't concentrating properly."
"Wonder why that was?" said Harry sarcastically.
Unfortunately, their day didn't get much better. Up next was Double Potions which would be a horrible experience in the best of circumstances. Being shut in a dungeon for an hour and a half with Snape and the Slytherins was going to be absolute torture. During the last Potions class, Hermione had needed to sit there and repeat "ignore them, ignore them, ignore them," under her breath to calm him down.
When Hermione and Harry arrived outside Snape's dungeon after lunch, they found the Slytherins waiting outside. Most (if not all) of them wore a large badge on the front of their robes. For one wild moment, Hermione was confused and thought they were S.P.E.W. badges, but then she could see them up close. They all bore the same message in luminous red letters that burnt brightly in the dimly lit underground passage:
Support CEDRIC DIGGORY -
The REAL Hogwarts Champion!
"Like them, Potter?" said Malfoy loudly as they approached. "And this isn't all they do - look!"
He pressed his badge into his chest, and the other message upon it vanished. It was replaced by another one, which glowed green:
POTTER STINKS
The Slytherins howled with laughter. Each of them pressed their badges, too, until the message "POTTER STINKS" shone brightly around them.
"Oh, very funny," Hermione said sarcastically to Pansy Parkinson and her gang of Slytherin girls, laughing harder than anyone. "Really witty."
Ron caught Hermione's eye as he stood against the wall with Dean and Seamus. He wasn't laughing, but he wasn't sticking up for Harry either. Hermione tried to convince him to back them up with her eyes, but Ron wasn't having any of it.
"Want one, Granger?" said Malfoy, holding a badge to Hermione. "I've got loads. But don't touch my hand, now. I've just washed it, you see. Don't want a Mudblood sliming it up."
Beside her, Harry grabbed his wand.
"Harry," Hermione said warningly.
"Go on, then, Potter," Malfoy said quietly, drawing out his own wand. "Moody's not here to look after you now - do it, if you've got the guts."
For a split second, it looked like both boys would back out. But then, at the exact same time, they both acted.
"Furnunculus!" Harry yelled.
"Densaugeo!" screamed Malfoy.
Jets of light shot from both wands, hit each other in mid-air, and ricocheted off at angles – Harry's hit Goyle in the face, and Malfoy's hit Hermione.
Hermione immediately felt a burning pain as though she had filled her mouth with boiling water. The burning soon turned to a piercing ache in her jaw and teeth. Then, within a minute or two, she felt an intense pressure against her bottom lip, moving towards her chin. Hermione immediately threw her hands up to her mouth and let out a strangled cry when her hands felt what was happening to her face.
Her front teeth were growing rapidly and were already past her bottom lip and halfway down her chin. Hermione immediately could feel her breath leave her lungs and her heart start hammering in her chest. Tears burned her eyes as she looked wildly around, trying to find help wherever she could.
"Hermione!" came Ron's voice from her left. She turned to see him running over to see if she was ok. Ron couldn't see her teeth like that! Hermione covered her mouth again as much as possible and tried to push him away with his other hand.
"And what is all this noise about?" said a soft, deadly voice. Snape had arrived. Goyle was bellowing in pain, his hands covering his face. However, instead of rapidly growing teeth, the Slytherin had rapidly growing boils springing up all over.
The Slytherins clamoured to give their explanations. Snape pointed a long yellow finger at Malfoy and said, "Explain."
"Potter attacked me, sir-"
"We attacked each other at the same time!" Harry shouted.
"-and he hit Goyle. Look!"
Hermione watched from between her fingers as Snape examined Goyle, whose face now resembled something that would have been at home in a book on poisonous fungi. He was, without a doubt, hexed. Hermione, however, was worried that her hex wasn't overt enough, that people would just see her long beaver teeth and think that was her normal look.
"Hospital wing, Goyle," Snape said calmly.
"Malfoy got Hermione!" Ron said. "Look!"
Before she knew it, Ron was tearing her hands off her face, though she knew her teeth had grown past the end of her chin and couldn't be covered completely. Tears stung her eyes as Pansy Parkinson, and the other Slytherin girls were doubled up with silent giggles from behind Snape's back.
Hermione felt Snape's cold eyes staring at her. She looked up at him, hoping for some mercy, some compassion.
"I see no difference."
Hermione's heart exploded in a flurry. The panic was overtaking her. She heard herself whimper and felt herself start to run away. It was as if she had an out-of-body experience. In the faraway distance, she could hear Ron and Harry screaming at Snape, but she paid them no attention. She just kept running and running and running.
She passed Goyle on his way to the hospital at some point but paid him no mind. She passed dozens of other students in the hall but couldn't focus on any of their faces. All that mattered was that she ran away from Snape and the other Slytherins as fast as she could.
"Hermione!"
She heard her name being called behind her, but didn't turn around. She didn't want to see anyone else's reaction other than Madam Pomfrey's in the hospital wing.
"Hermione! Wait!"
Hermione ignored the voice again and continued blindly running through the corridors and up the stairs. The tears were freely falling now as she felt her teeth start to dig into her chest, making it impossible for her to keep her face towards the ground. Nonetheless, she persisted.
"Hermione, watch out!" came the voice again. Hermione tried to glance behind her, but her teeth got stuck on her shoulder. She let out another strangled cry as she pushed forward at full force.
BAM!
Hermione thought she had run into a cement wall for a second until she heard whatever she hit grunt in pain. She fell backwards, landing hard on her backside in a heap.
"Hermione! Are you ok?!" came the worried, familiar voice from behind her, now getting closer, but Hermione was more interested in whoever grunted in front of her.
She looked in front of her and slowly raised her head. There, in front of her, was none other than Viktor Krum. Everything else floated away in her shock.
"You ok?" he asked in a thick accent as he stared down at her.
"Hermione, are you ok?" echoed the voice behind her.
Sophie slid to the ground next to her, putting her arms around her.
"I fink so," Hermione tried to say, only to be reminded of the issue with her teeth. Her hands immediately went back up to try to cover them.
"I help you up," Viktor said, extending his large, strong hand to Hermione. She had to make a snap decision: did she refuse his help or accept it and uncover her still-growing teeth?
She looked up again into Viktor's face and saw for the first time how incredibly soft it seemed. His dark eyes had a kind twinkle behind them and seemed sincere.
Hermione took a steely breath, uncovered her teeth, and reached up to take his hand. The Bulgarian Seeker lifted her up as if she were made of air. Sophie scrambled up as well, somewhat in awe of Viktor's strength.
"Someone jinxed you," Viktor said softly, furrowing his brows. "I stop." He pulled out his wand and drew a shield-like shape in the air. "Finite," he said in a low, confident voice.
Hermione's teeth stopped growing at once. They were still quite long, but at least they weren't getting any longer.
"Fank you," Hermione lisped, blushing.
"Hermione, I'm so sorry," Sophie said. "I should have stopped them."
"It's ok," she tried to say, but still wasn't clear.
"I take you to hospital," Viktor said. "Come."
Hermione and Sophie shared an incredulous look. He took her arm and started walking Hermione down the hall, Sophie following closely behind. Hermione had made it relatively far in her blind run, as they were only one corridor from the Hospital Wing.
As the unlikely trio walked into the Hospital Wing, Madam Pomfrey took one look at Hermione and bustled over.
"Miss Granger, what happened?" she asked, taking Hermione's arm from Viktor and leading her over to a bed.
"Draco Malfoy jinxed her," Sophie said tightly.
"The Densaugeo jinx, I presume?" Madam Pomfrey shook her head.
"Yeah. Gregory Goyle will be coming eventually, too. He's just a little slower when it comes to… everything," Sophie said.
"And Mr Krum, were you involved in any of this nonsense?" she asked, looking the Bulgarian up and down.
"I just help," he said.
"Then I would assume you have other places to be… perhaps the weighing of the wands? Or did you forget about that?" Madam Pomfrey asked sternly. "I have to attend to my patients. Miss Roper, can you please escort Mr Krum out of the hospital wing?"
"Yes, Madam Pomfrey," Sophie said, winking at Hermione before taking Viktor's arm. "Let's go, Vicky!"
"I is Viktor," Viktor said, confused, but allowed Sophie to walk her out of the Hospital Wing.
"Alright, Miss Granger," Madam Pomfrey said, turning her attention back to Hermione. "Luckily for you, the Densuageo jinx is much more manageable than an animal transformation from Polyjuice Potion. We'll have you fixed up in no time. Mr Goyle, I'm afraid, will have a bit more of a difficult recovery," she added as she eyed Goyle, who had finally made it to the Hospital Wing.
"My face," he groaned, panting from the exertion of walking there from the dungeons.
"Probably serves you right," Madam Pomfrey said, pointing to another hospital bed far from Hermione's. "Sit over there and wait until I finish with Miss Granger."
"If he is going to take longer, you can 'tart with him," Hermione said.
"He can certainly wait his turn," Madam Pomfrey said. "I'm sure he was part of what created this whole mess, so maybe a little waiting will make him think twice next time."
Madam Pomfrey walked over to her cabinet of potions and salves, grabbed an ivory bottle, and returned to Hermione's bedside. She pulled the curtain around them and set the bottle on the bed. "Now, Miss Granger, this will be an incremental process. Every time I brush this potion on your teeth, they will reduce in size by a millimetre or so. Once we get your teeth back to a more manageable size, I will need your help to know when to stop at your previous size. Do you understand?"
Hermione nodded her agreement. Suddenly, a thought occurred to her. Maybe she could "accidentally" allow Madam Pomfrey to reduce the size of her teeth more than before the hex. If she couldn't fix her bushy hair, her teeth were something at least. Plus, the thought of getting braces was unimaginable.
Madam Pomfrey unscrewed the cap on the ivory bottle and dipped in a regular, Muggle-looking toothbrush. The bristles came out with a violet liquid coating them.
"This may tingle a bit," Madam Pomfrey said as she brushed at the bottom of Hermione's teeth. Hermione felt the tingling instantaneously and fought the urge to run her tongue over her teeth (not that it was possible).
After about five minutes of brushing (and Goyle moaning on the other side of the curtain), the healer picked up the mirror lying on the bed next to Hermione. "Hold this up and tell me when to stop."
Hermione knew it was now or never - this would be the moment when she completely defied her parents and fixed her teeth magically instead of the braces they wanted her to have. "A little bit more," Hermione said. "A little bit more… a little bit more… a little bit more… There!"
Hermione admired her teeth in the hand mirror. They were perfect. She smiled widely, feeling better than she had about them for quite some time… though the excitement waned when she realised she'd have to go back out to the corridors and face all the students again.
Luckily, Hermione made it up to her dormitory without much incident and was able to take a small nap. There was only a half hour left of Potions, and she was emotionally exhausted, so much so that she voluntarily decided to miss a class. When she woke up, there was a note on her side table from Professor Flitwick.
Dear Miss Granger,
Please come to the Charms classroom after the day's afternoon classes are done.
F. Flitwick.
Hermione straightened out her clothes and headed to the Charms classroom. Professor Flitwick and Jillian were both there waiting for her.
"My apologies," Hermione said. "I had to go to see Madam Pomfrey." They didn't need to know she had also taken a nap.
"No bother," Professor Flitwick said. "So, today we will learn a variation of the Shield Charm that can be localised to Miss Haught's cochlear implants and battery chargers. While the Shield Charm is usually taught to sixth-year students, Professor McGonagall and I believe you will be able to master it without issue, Miss Granger.
"As you may know, when a Shield Charm is cast, an invisible shield is conjured in front of the caster's wand, creating a protective barrier between themselves and the magic from their attacker. The most common Shield Charm is, of course, Protego. However, Professor McGonagall has found that the lesser-known charm, Contego, works much better as it is more of a covering shield than a protection shield.
"The wand movement is very similar to the standard Protego flick, but it's a much smaller and more precise movement. I'll demonstrate. Miss Haught, if you could sit down here. It's paramount you are eye level with the item you are protecting, Miss Granger," Professor Flitwick said pointedly.
Jillian sat down next to Professor Flitwick without any hesitation, though Hermione realised this was probably normal to her now. She wondered how many times Professor McGonagall and Professor Flitwick had done this. Because she was starting to feel a bit nervous about the gravity of it all, she decided to ask. "Professor, how long does this charm last?"
"About a week," Jillian answered. "So I won't need you to do this very often, but it's really a drag when I wake up, put them on, and they don't work. I'd rather just come to your room than try to find either Professor McGonagall or Professor Flitwick."
"Makes sense," Hermione nodded.
"Now, Miss Granger, pay special attention to the wand movement," Professor Flitwick said. He took his wand and pointed it straight up in the air. Then, in one quick movement, he flicked it downwards and pointed it precisely at the centre of the magnetic button and earpiece on the side of Jillian's head. The tip of the wand was incredibly close as well. The precision was impressive, and Hermione felt nervous about the daunting task.
"As you can see, you have to be extremely precise," Professor Flitwick seemed to read her mind. "You don't want to Charm any parts that shouldn't be charmed, only the cochlear implant. Now, you try."
Hermione took a deep breath and stepped up to Jillian. Jillian gave her a reassuring smile and sat perfectly still. Hermione raised her wand, pointed it upwards, and then swished down, trying to stop at the right part with all of her might. Unfortunately, she was too high by about an inch.
"Great first try, Miss Granger," Professor Flitwick said earnestly, though Hermione didn't believe him. "What I want you to do is hold your wand in your hand. Feel the weight. Can you feel it?"
"Yes."
"Now, bounce your hand up and down. Feel where that weight hits and how it makes your hand bounce down. Now, remember that weight when you stop the wand movement - how low will your hand automatically bounce? And then adjust your down stroke accordingly."
Hermione did as the Charms Professor suggested. She could feel the weight of her wand (she always was surprised at the weight!) and tried to memorise the feel. Without prompting, she tried the hand movement again. This time, she hit her mark but bounced upwards slightly.
"Oh, bravo!" Professor Flitwick squealed. "Now you see that bounce? You over-corrected slightly too much, but only slightly, Miss Granger. Let's try again. Weigh the wand and go!"
Hermione swished downwards, again and again, getting better and better as she did. Finally, after her seventh try, she was able to stop the wand exactly.
"Brilliant!" Professor Flitwick said. "I knew you could do it, Miss Granger! Now, do it thirty more times. Muscle memory, my dear!"
Hermione did as she was told. Time after time, her wand was precise and sharp. She didn't miss once.
"Excellent, Miss Granger!"
"I'm impressed!" Jillian said with a smirk.
"Now, let's add in the incantation, shall we?" Professor Flitwick said. Hermione felt herself immediately start to panic.
"Maybe I should try a few more times," she said.
"You'll just make yourself more nervous," said Professor Flitwick. "Believe me, you can do this Miss Granger," he added.
"I trust you," Jillian said simply and without any hint of fear.
Hermione nodded her head, determined.
"The incantation is simply, 'Con-TAY-goh,' with the stress on the 'tay.' Now you say it."
"Contego," Hermione said.
"Excellent. Now pair it with the wand movement - your hand will be up at 'con,' forty-five degrees at 'tay,' and your ending pose will be on 'go.' Ready? Begin."
Hermione cast the spell before she could think about it. To her delight, an icy blue light emanated out the tip of her wand and shot directly into the side of Jillian's head. The outer part of the implant briefly glowed blue before returning to normal.
"Perfection," Professor Flitwick said. "And that's all there is to it! Miss Haught, if you need this spell, you have my permission to add Miss Granger to the list of people who can help."
"Cheers! I knew you could do it!" Jillian smiled. "Mind you, I'm not a morning person, so if I just point to my ears and grunt, just pretend I asked nicely."