I've been patient before. I've subjected myself to enormous amounts of pain, to cruel and unusual torment, and the most terrible of it all, waiting. Honestly, it never gets easier. Waiting to rematerialize so that I could kill the Sultan quietly? The pain of being decapitated and parceled was trivial compared to how long I waited. Weeding out and destroying the Valarious family line? The wounds I sustained were trivial compared to how long I waited. Getting the McRib from McDonalds? The heartburn I sustained was trivial compared to how long I waited. If you can't tell, I really hate waiting... which is why a hundred fifty years is a hundred fifty too many.

-excerpt from the Vampire Journals

Chapter 13: The Waiting Game

Anna had been completely correct; the train was insufferably slow. It hadn't been a long trip from the dressing store to the train, and after a moment of Anna pushing buttons on the main console, they began rolling to their destination. And frankly, it was rolling at a very, VERY, slow pace.

Forty-eight hours was a long time, and Alucard was beginning to realize just how long of a time it might be. Two whole days with nothing to do... and no one to do.

A grin spread across his face at the thought of what he could do with Anna for forty-eight hours. Just as quickly, the grin faded. No two days of fornication could replace what he really wanted from Anna; her hand in marriage. To be with her, in holy matrimony... or, more accurately, unholy matrimony... until the end of time, united forever by a binding covenant. For he to be hers, and her to be his, forever.

Unfortunately, that was not going to happen; not here, on this train ride.

All that was going to come of this ride, he realized, was forty-eight hours of torture. Torture from the fact that he was in such a close proximity to the woman he loved, torture because he would never have her, and torture because at any moment, the truth might be unwittingly revealed to her.

Some part of him hadto have known that telling Seras the truth... well, most of it... had been a bad idea. Seras was curious by nature, and from the way she was mirrin' Anna, it wouldn't be long before they started talking... and when they did, discrepancies were bound to come to light.

It didn't matter how far away he kept the two of them, either, because Seras had a tendency to make the worst possible comments at the worst possible times... or, at least, it had become a recent development for such to be the case. She had already made a rather risqué remark about him being "in love", and it wasn't stupid to think she might do it again. For some reason, she seemed to enjoy the idea of him loving Anna, and that enjoyment would only spur her on.

He resolved to keep a close eye on the two of them. Hopefully, if things got too heavy, he could intervene in time to keep his web of lies tightly wound... and keep Anna safe.

Another part of him began whispering that there was no point in keeping the lie alive; the longer he was around Anna, the greater the chance that the web would be unwound. It was going to end up being more trouble than it was worth.

That may have been true, but he wasn't known for going down easy.

'Or, hear me out', Jackal said from within his coat, 'we could waste everyone on this train beforeall of that even starts.'

"Shut up, inanimate object."

With a start, Alucard realized he had said that out loud. With another start, he realized everyone had heard him... and were all currently staring at him. Thinking quickly, Alucard whipped up a grin.

"Just practicing for the next time Pip asks me a question."

"Baise merde", the Frenchman mumbled.

"How much has madness consumed you, wicked creature", Anna asked in Romanian.

"Unfortunately, not enough", Alucard responded in the same dialect. "I envy the mad; for them, life is simple."

"You speak my language well", Anna told him, almost as if she wasn't surprised at all. "I even hear a hint of Roma on your tongue. we met on the fields of France, but I feel like I've known you since before then."

"Well, of course you should", Seras butted in from across the car, "after all-"

"Our battles stretch farther than the Great War", Alucard said with the hint of a grin on his face. "In fact, I've been your opposing force since day one."

"He led the army that fought yours", Seras explained.

Externally, Alucard facepalmed. Internally, Alucard cringed. This was exactly what he had been hoping to prevent. Now it was out.

Anna, however, did not keep her reaction internal. Loud, rancorous laughter, which sounded out through the train car like church bells on satin walls, rocked the eardrums of Alucard as she threw her head back. Eventually, she worked herself to doubled over, clutching her gut, roaring with laughter.

When she had finally calmed down enough to get a word in, she turned a finger towards Alucard, and declared, "You mean to tell me, that it is your belief, that this sniveling, pathetic excuse for a vampire actually led the army that fought my family for ten generations?!"

"But-", Seras began.

This time, Alucard cut her off.

"I said I had an army", he clarified, "not that I led it."

"But I-"

Anna wheeled on him, the laughter dying instantly.

"You say that as if Dracula's army was family to you."

A probe, and a good one at that.

"They were family to me", Alucard admitted. "For a long time, they were the only family I had."

"Yet now, you claim to hunt them", Anna declared. "Why, I wonder, would you turn on them so easily?"

"Actually", Alucard admitted, "it's kind of the other way around. They betrayed me, and if there's anything I hate in this life more than Turks or my father, it's being betrayed."

"So now you reveal your true hand", Anna said, pointing at him again. "You fight not for glory, or retribution, or even forgiveness, but out of spite!"

"Then are we so different", Alucard asked coyly, with a raise of his eyebrow.

Anna didn't respond to that. She let her hand fall to her side. She stared evenly at him, leveling threats and accusations with her eyes. Then she turned, found herself a half-decent seat, and curled up onto it.

"It will be a long journey", Anna declared, "and a fierce battle. I suggest we all get some rest while we can."

With that, Anna laid her head on the seat rest and closed her eyes. Two sets of eyes turned towards him; one bewildered pair of innocent blue eyes, and one singular inquisitive brown eye. Alucard nodded, and Pip returned the nod, putting his stupid outback hat down over his face. The rest of the Mercs seemed to take the hint, and they curled up to get some rest. Seras, still a bit bewildered, curled up as well, her eyes at first on Pip, and then shifting over towards Anna.

Alucard allowed his mind to wonder. Currently, all of his thoughts were on everything that stank, which meant his thoughts were on everything. They were most definitely walking into a trap, and that stank. His plan to turn the tide stank. Pip stank, and furthermore, so did Anna. He wasn't quite ready to mention to her that she reeked of werewolf just yet, but if he had to smell it for much longer, he just might start acting up.

Speaking of acting up, his eyes landed on Seras, and noticed that she was trying to sneak a hand down her pants. Under normal circumstances, Alucard couldn't have given less of a shit. Frankly, he'd probably have been doing the exact same thing, more than likely in full view of everyone, without a care in the world.

However, with Anna Valarious in their presence, even thinking about the act seemed... dirty. That was a strange word in a strange context for him, but the very presence of Anna Valarious just seemed to make him... want to be better. And for some fucked up reason, that meant doing the right thing.

"Police Girl", he said in his usual tone.

The young woman nearly flew out of her seat, and quickly turned her head to look at her master, her face burning hot with a blush. Alucard kept a neutral expression, slowly shaking his head.

"When Anna wakes up", he continued in the same tone, "I'll teach you how to properly swordfight. So that, you know, you don't get cleaved."

Seras swallowed a big knot in her throat, and nodded furiously, quickly sinking back down into her chair.

Now Alucard was picking up bits of conversation from the Mercs.

"Sorry, boss, but it looks like your crush over there's a girl-getter!"

"First of all", Pip replied in an irritated tone, "she's not my 'crush'. Second of all, even if she was, it's none of your, mine, or our business. And third of all, don't be so pessimistic! She could be bisexual, and that would just make her twice as fun!"

"Yeah, you French know all about bi, don't y'all? How's your boyfriend doin' back home, boss?"

"Oh, fuck right off."

That whole conversation pissed Alucard off, but instead of bitching about it, he dipped his head down and went to sleep.

The first part of his sleep was horrible. Dreams of torture, endless torture, the tears streaming down his face only goading his tormentors, people he had trusted and loved turning their backs on him. Family turning their backs on him. Humanity turning their backs on him. God turning His back on him.

He was alone, endlessly alone. He had finally made himself strong enough that he no longer needed to rely on anyone else. Yet, even without the betrayers, life was...

Hopeless. Empty. Unnecessary.

Lonely.

But his dreams changed; suddenly, he was looking up at a brilliant night sky, filled with billions of stars, and a big, bright, full moon. As his gaze made its way downward, he realized that he stood in an unfinished gazebo. He was dressed in his red duster, his hat firmly atop his head, but his glasses were nowhere to be seen.

Turning his head to the right, he glimpsed Alexander Anderson, clothed in much more traditional Catholic attire, with a white scarf draped across his shoulders, and a bible in his hands. Anderson winked at him, and he instinctively winked back.

Glancing to his left, he saw a long procession of corpses, although, if an outsider had seen what he was seeing, he would not have said so; the Helsing family line looked really good for being almost all dead for quite some time. They were seated to the left of a large red silk cloth which served as a divider between rows on rows of folding chairs.

The first face he saw was Abraham Van Helsing himself. The old coot had a big smile on his face, and he looked almost younger than when Alucard had first met him. To his left sat his only son, Gabriel, dressed from head to toe in the shine-polished silver-lined plate armor that he had used throughout World War I. He shared his father's wide smile.

Gabriel's two boys stood to the left of him. Arthur wore a look of soft, warm, contented acceptance, whereas Richard looked like he might scoff out loud at any second. Arthur's hand was situated upon the shoulder of his daughter, who sat puffing on a big Churchill cigar, her lips curled up in a satisfied, knowing smirk. Her suit was all white, even down to the shoes she wore.

The folding chairs to the right of the silk procession sat nothing but corpses; the whole Valarious family line, going back ten generations, going all the way back to Khan Valarious, all of them decked out in their ornate ceremonial plate armor, laced with gold, silver, and jewels. Even Christopher, Anna's brother, was there, dressed in brown gambeson, his hair slicked back.

Funny, but at a second glance, he couldn't pick Anna's father Hogarth out of the crowd.

When he did finally find him, he almost fainted. He, too, was decked out in ceremonial armor, a black eyepatch covering one eye, and a silver rosary dangling from his neck. He had a wide grin on his face, and his daughter on his arm.

Anna Valarious looked more beautiful in that moment than in any other; she wore a white gown, simple, but elegant, with a few noticeable stitch jobs here and there. A hand-me-down, but it was perfect for her.

Alucard began to rationalize that this was another bad dream. He began looking around for the army that would sweep them all up, for the jokes and giggles in the peoples' eyes... and for that rotten bastard Gideon.

But he stood alone with Anderson on this gazebo, and Anna was walking slowly towards him, with her arm crooked inside her father's. The closer she got, the more nervous she looked. Hogarth led her straight up to the gazebo, and then released her, returning to his chair by his son, but not sitting.

She walked up the steps to where he stood, and turned to face him. She looked very nervous. He must have looked bewildered.

"Dearly beloved", Anderson called out, "we are gathered here today to mark the joining of two very fucked up individuals in... well, I'd call it Holy Matrimony, but I'd be lyin', so we're just gonna marry 'em instead!"

Laughter from the audience, on both sides. Once it died down, Anderson continued.

"Who gives this here woman to be married?"

"I do", Hogarth called out.

"Now why the hell would you do something like that?"

"Because she asked me to", Hogarth replied with a chuckle.

More laughter from the audience.

"Well, then", Anderson continued, "we'd best get on with it! First, I'd like ya both to say your vow-"

A beeping from Anderson's pocket cut him off. He reached in and pulled out a small pager, glancing at the number on it. His eyes went wide, and he shoved the pager back into his pocket.

"Ah, cripe", Anderson said, as he fumbled about in his pocket. "Work's callin', I ain't got time fer this shite."

He pointed to Anna, asking, "Do you?"

"Yes", Anna replied, relief washing over her face.

Anderson pointed to Alucard, asking, "Do you?"

"I do", Alucard replied, a wave of peace coursing through his whole body.

"Good, yer married, kiss 'er."

Alucard leaned in, and grabbed Anna by her waist, spinning her around until she was stretched out beneath him, in a position that looked all too familiar. She closed her eyes, a content smile crossing her face. He leaned in, pursing his lips, ready to touch hers-

A shrill scream woke him up. As he was shaking the sleep from himself, a blur of motion appeared in his vision. On instinct, he twitched for his gun, but after a blink, the blur resolved itself to be Anna Valarious. He relaxed his hand, and let a grin stretch across his face, preparing a snide comment.

"Back so soo-"

He was interrupted by a slap across the face. The hand hit him so hard, in fact, that spots danced in his vision, and his teeth cut into his lip, causing blood to dribble out of his mouth. For a moment, the cabin was still, with every occupant turning their eyes towards Alucard.

"Funny", Alucard said, as he snaked his tongue out of his mouth to lick up the red liquid, "but I don't recall offending your honor... recently."

Anna's sword flew out of its scabbard, and before the human eye could blink, it was touching Alucard's throat. Almost immediately, everyone else in the cabin pulled their arms and had them aimed at the fiery redhead. Seras looked horrified, especially when a dribble of blood began trickling down Alucard's neck, but the Mercs seemed surprisingly calm.

Anna finally broke the silence with an enraged grunt.

"If you ever meddle with my dreams again, monster, I will cut your belly, strangle you with your own entrails, and drag you from them behind this train!"

"I wasn't meddling with anyone's dreams", Alucard told her. "In fact, I was having a rather pleasant one myself."

"It was you", she yelled, the tip of the blade digging into his neck a little harder. "Stay out of my head!"

"Funny", Alucard told her, "but the one time I have a nice dream, I get woken up. You know how long it's been since I've actually got some decent rest?"

"You don't deserve any rest", Anna said, with conviction in her voice, and much more emotion, "cruel monster!"

"What was so bad about your dream that you think I'm messing with your head?"

"You... you", Anna stammered, the blade digging into his throat even moreso, drawing even more blood from him. Finally, with a thrust that almost opened a true hole in his neck, she screamed, "YOU MARRIED ME, YOU WICKED CREATURE!"

Now the whole cabin was deathly silent. The Mercs and Seras alike had their heads swiveling from Anna to Alucard. Anna had narrowed her eyes, wondering what would come next.

Slowly, very slowly, the corners of Alucard's mouth twitched up... not into a wicked grin, but into a genuine smile.

"Under the stars? In a gazebo? Were the Helsings there? And the Valarious's? Was the minister some crazy Scottish guy? What exactly was I wearing?"

The icy look from Anna stopped him suddenly. When those eyes pierced into his own, it was like she was searching his very soul... and finding every smudge ever put upon it.

"Never mind gutting you", Anna sneered. "My sword is already at your neck. I believe I'll just end this now."

"N-no you won't", Seras called out from the other side of the cabin.

Anna turned her head ever so slightly in her direction.

"And why, pray tell, not?"

"Because", Seras began, but stumbled on her words. "B-because-"

"Because, mon petite choufleur", Pip spoke up, in a very nonchalant and upbeat tone, "we outnumber you six to one, and we've got some pretty heavy firepower. I knew you vampires can take a beating, but can you come back from complete pulverization?"

Anna kept her eyes locked with Alucard's. She kept up the icy glare, but it looked like she was thinking hard. More than likely, about who she would have to kill first, and how fast she would have to do it.

Slowly, very slowly, she began lowering her sword. When it was down at waist-level, the Mercs began lowering their own weapons.

"Perhaps you have a point", Anna told them, as she sheathed her sword. "Although, you voiced an incorrect presumption, undoubtedly spread by this foul creature", as she said this, she waved her hand carelessly in Alucard's direction. "I am not a filthy vampire. I am a Regenerator."

The Mercs began sharing confused glances at that. They hadn't been made aware of what a "Regenerator" was or how it might affect the situation they were in. But Seras, with a wild look of bewilderment, had her gaze fixed on Alucard.

Alucard locked eyes with her, as Anna made her way back to her seat, and very slowly shook his head.

"Say, Police Girl", Alucard spoke up, "now is as good a time as any to learn how to not die in a swordfight. Let's do that right now."

Alucard hastily stood up, and quickly withdrew his Magyar. He sliced a metal pole apart to about the same length, and walked over to where Seras still sat, with a blank look on her face. As he was approaching her, he attempted to establish a telepathic connection with her. He had to strain to make it work, but he finally got a solid connection to her mind by the time he had approached her.

He passed the sword to her unceremoniously. At first, she didn't even take it, simply staring at it like it was the first time she was seeing it. After a moment, she glanced up at him.

"Didn't Alexander Anderson say-"

Shut up, he said in her mind. Don't talk, just listen. From now on, we are done talking out loud. Just think about what you want to say to me.

Why, she thought. Are you reading my mind?

What a dumb question, he said, as he set the sword down on her lap.

She finally got the hint, and took the sword in her hand, standing up straight. Alucard turned around, heading for the back of the cabin, where there weren't any people that Seras could accidentally decapitate. She followed closely behind him.

When they were a good distance away from everyone, Alucard stopped, and turned to face Seras, taking up a guard position.

"Now", Alucard told her, "attack me."

Seras took a tentative swing, and he blocked it easily.

"See how I did that? Now you try."

As she held up a rather sloppy guard, he brought the pipe down on it, breaking her guard easily. She stumbled for a moment, nearly falling over. She caught herself a few feet away from him.

"That was sloppy", Alucard told her. "Attack me again, and watch how I defend."

I didn't lie when I said I sired Anna, Alucard projected into her mind, as she took another puny swing at him.

"Could've fooled me", she said out loud, in a rather sarcastic tone.

"That's because you watch too many movies", Alucard told her, as he deftly blocked the swing.

What did I just say about talking out loud? Forget it, I see you trying to open your mouth.

But Master, Seras thought, Regeneration is a gift from God. Sir Integra told me that.

"You're overextending yourself", he told her, "let the sword do the work. It's got a sharp edge for a reason."

Integra doesn't know everything, Alucard revealed,and she's been led by certain people to believe things that aren't true. The truth is, Regenerators are made when tainted blood touches the heart of an unbitten human. Really, there's a lot more to it than that, but that's the jist.

He watched Seras try to register that for a moment, as she prepared to swing again. She stopped mid-strike as what he said finally sunk in.

Oh my God, she thought, as her mouth worked to make sound, you forced her to drink your blood?!

Alucard parried her strike to compensate for her lack of movement. The sword clattered to the ground, and she grabbed her hand, nursing it.

You're right, Alucard told her. I had a choice; let her die and go to Hell, or force immortality upon her.

Seras brought her hand up to her chest, and turned her head down towards it, examining it like it was the most interesting thing in the world.

Do you think I made the wrong choice?

She glared at him, and said out loud, "I think you're a horrible person."

"Hey, you're the one who missed."

"Why would you do that", she practically screamed.

Not out loud.

Why the bloody hell not?! She already knows all of this!

That's the thing, though-

Their information sharing was interrupted by a snort from Anna. Both he and Seras turned to look at her. She rolled her blue eyes in exasperation.

"Would you teach a newborn to walk by pushing the poor babe in front of a moving carriage?"

"That's how I was taught."

"Despicable", Anna said.

She stood up from her seat, and walked towards the two vampires, drawing her sword from its sheath. The Mercs began raising their weapons in response, but she paid them no mind. She walked right up to Seras, waving a hand at Alucard.

"Sit down", Anna told him, "I'll teach your apprentice properly."

Alucard did as he was told, quickly snaking around the two to take up a seat closer to the people. Seras was a bit surprised by the amount of sway she held over Alucard; when Mum told him to do something, it was usually met with a few "fuck-off's" before it was done. It was like he didn't even want to upset her.

Anna walked over to Seras, and made an upper guard position.

"I want you to do what you see here", Anna told her.

Seras did so, hoping that Anna wouldn't see how badly she was shaking.

Anna looked her up and down, and said, "Your arms are too flexible. Your guard should be firm enough to withstand a forceful blow."

As Seras tried to stiffen out her arms more, Anna looked down at her legs.

"Your stance is not very strong", she told the fledgling vampire. "A good stricture is to keep your legs shoulder-length apart, and to bend your knees."

Spreading out her legs and bending them at the knees, Seras wondered in a panic if Anna's sense of smell was strong. She didn't know if Anna would be able to smell her pheromones, since she was fairly certain that Alucard could do that. She wanted this weird phase to be over already.

"No, young one, not quite like that", Anna said with a shake of her head. "Spread them from front to end, so that your balance is evenly dispersed across all angles."

She widened her stance front to back, and Anna nodded.

"Very good. A tree with sturdy roots will weather any storm. Remember this when you move your legs."

She was going to remember Anna when she moved her legs tonight, that much she knew.

The thought startled her a bit. It sounded exactly like something Alucard would say. She felt a bit disgusted with herself.

She almost didn't see Anna's sword come down. By the time she did, she could only bring her own sword up so much. But even with that little bit, she felt leaps and bounds more steady blocking Anna's strike.

"Very good. Now, remember, block with the flat part of the blade. It will save the sharpness, and it will decrease the reverberation. And don't be so shy to move about; movement will save you as much as skill in a swordfight."

Alucard watched from afar. He wished Anna had been his Swordmaster, and not that filthy Turk who had beaten him until he either got it or the Turk got tired. Then again, if he had been trained by the soft, gentle types, he might have turned out soft and gentle.

And think how much history would have changed.

He was shaken from his thoughts by someone sliding into the seat next to him. He didn't need to turn around to know who it was, because his nostrils were immediately flooded by the smell of musty armpit mixed with croissant.

"I don't trust her", Pip said slowly and evenly, never taking his eyes off the feminine duo.

"Who", Alucard asked.

"The one who calls herself-"

"Cares."

"Look", Pip said with a sigh, "fuck with me for the rest of this trip, but hear me out just this once."

Alucard tilted his head slightly, trying not to crack a smile at the fact that this retard had just wasted his one favor making him listen to what he already knew he was going to say.

"Fine."

"I don't know what's going on between you two-"

"Good", Alucard interjected, "keep it that way."

"...and I don't care. But no one switches sides that fast unless they're into politics or deception, and she's not nearly fat enough to be in politics."

"If you're implying that she's leading us into a trap, I'm well aware. As an old friend of mine once said, 'It's hard to stare into a lion's mouth without seeing its teeth.'"

Pip, more surprised that Alucard had actual friends than by anything, was silent for a moment. He sat back in his chair, and closed his eye.

"Alright", Pip said, "you know it's a trap. What do you plan to do about it?"

"What I always do", Alucard told him, with an increasing grin. "Spring it."