Thank you to campy, Boris Yeltsin, campy, Uberscribbler, Eddy13, David Falkayn, F86Sabre53, CajunBear73, Quathis, Jimmy1201, Molly, Anonymoose, Bobtrumpet, Brenna for reviewing and to everyone for reading.
Thanks also to everyone who has favorite this or any of my other stories.
And, finally, my gratitude to campy and Molloy for looking over this chapter.
KP © Disney; Original Characters © the Author
The resemblance of any characters in this story to any individuals, alive or dead, is purely coincidental and just a hoax.
Ferociously Freaky Friday
I.
Ann Possible heard the doorbell ring and went down from the master bedroom dressed in her pajamas and a robe to see who was coming by at such a late hour. She was surprised when she opened the door to see Kim's former foe and Drew Lipsky's current sidekick and paramour.
"Shego?"
"Yeah, can I come in?" she asked as she invited herself into the Possibles' home.
"Yes, of course," the brain surgeon said with a cocked eyebrow. "Even if it's late. You know Kim isn't here, don't you?"
"Yeah, Princess is at college, probably doing things with Dorkable that Daddy Possible would prefer not to know about."
Ann looked at her blandly.
"Am I right?"
A small, wry grin spread on Ann's face. "On both counts. But you're not here to talk about my daughter's love life, are you?"
"Nope. Miss Priss seems to be doing okay by herself. Unfortunately, I'm not, and I need some help from somebody who no longer sleeps with a Cuddle Buddy."
II.
Ann had just made some tea, brought the pot to the table to steep, and sat down with Shego when Jim and Tim came barreling through the kitchen.
"Boys, no running in the house!" Ann scolded as her boys ran past her wearing their mission gear. "And keep it down, your father's sleeping."
"Sorry, Mom …" Jim said.
"… But Wade just called!" Tim finished his sentence.
Shego cocked an eyebrow, then grabbed the two tweens.
"Hey!" they both exclaimed.
"Ok, just a moment, Munchkins," Shego snapped as she held them up off the floor, their feet dangling. "Just why are you guys dressed like Stoppable's little brothers and what do you mean by 'Wade called'?"
"We're going on a mission ..."
"… Yeah, Kim's not here, so we said we'd help out!"
"Oy," Shego said. "The whole family …"
She reluctantly put them down on the ground but didn't let them go. Then she turned to Ann. "You really okay with this? Shouldn't they be in bed or something?"
Ann shrugged. "It's just part of growing up. It's not a school night and it's not as if they're smoking or drinking," she answered before she looked at her sons. "You're not, are you?" she asked in a way that promised a world of hurt if they were.
The two boys blanched. "Yuck!" they exclaimed in unison.
"Okay, but I want you back as soon as you're done with the mission."
The twins replied by exchanging high fives, and as they left, exchanged their habitual cry of,
"Hicka bicka boo …"
"… Hoo shah!"
The two women watched the two boys scurry out the door into the dark of night. "Honestly, Shego, if they're helping take down villains, they can't blow up anything in the garage. Now tell me what's going on?"
Shego looked away, then sighed. "Drew."
"Yes?"
Shego sighed again. It was an impressive sound. "Why is it Kimmie is able to make things work with the Buffoon, but I can't make them work with Drew?"
"I'd appreciate you not talking about Ron that way," Ann said, a distinct chill to her voice. Shego intuited where Kim got her steel, nodded, and then spoke.
"How do you make something work with a, a, a …"
"Do you love him?" Ann cut in.
"I don't know. Dr. D drives me nuts, but I can't stand being away from him."
Ann nodded. "You sound like Kimmie did before she realized what she had with Ron."
"You think Drew and I got what Kimmie and Stoppable have going on?"
"No," Ann said frankly. "Every couple is unique, and I can say this as her mother, Kim and Ron are more unique than most. They're very lucky, but, frankly, judging yourself against your former foe isn't a good idea."
"Huh."
"What I'm trying to say, Shego, is that you seem to know you've got something special going on, but you don't know what it is. You need to figure out what that is, both for your sake and for Drew's."
"Great," she groused, resting her frowning face in her hands. "That's what I thought you were going to say."
III.
Kim and Ron lay in the bed snuggled up. They'd done that before but not like this and most definitely not after doing that. They both sighed contentedly. They'd crossed a line, changed the terms of their relationship once again, and knew they'd made the right decision. Still, while some things were epically different in their relationship, other things remained constant.
"Jinx," Kim said with a knowing smile.
"Even now?" Ron responded with faux outrage. "I've lost count of how many sodas I owe you!"
"Sodas are so last season," she purred. "The rules have changed."
"Yeah? You think you could tell me what they are then?"
"Better yet, I'll show you," she said in a way that set Ron's heart racing.
"Boo—" his response was cut off by Kim's pair of lips.
IV.
The dinothingy was making short work of the Cow 'n' Chow parking lot and everything in it. The restaurant's large sign had been knocked over, cars were crushed, and the fake cows out front were history. Now the beast had turned its attention to the fast food outlet itself.
Inside, a lone figure huddled into a ball, for the first time in his life not trying to draw attention to himself as he simpered and desperately held a stash of Fatt Matt burgers to his bosom.
"You loser," he snarled with false bravado. "Believe me, my lawyers, they're the best lawyers, incredible, will be all over you—"
His rant was abruptly ended as the dinothingy ripped the façade of the building clean off. A decidedly unmanly scream of non-courage could be heard throughout the neighborhood.
Inside the dining room the giant reptile's keen sense of smell helped it quickly locate its prey, who was cowering behind the counter behind a hastily built wall of fast food supplies. Monster and maniac briefly exchanged a glance.
Outside, Justine, the Wadebot, Yori, Jim, Tim, Hobble, Labowski, the Cow 'n' Chow employees, and the gathered crowd of random Middletonians watched in horror and fascination as the dinothingy swooped down with its powerful arm, effortlessly grabbed a squealing Mr. Biglee, and then scooped the blubbering one-time TV personality and failed real estate developer into its hungry maw.
The burp the creature released was impressive, to say the least.
V.
"Oh, snap," Justine said as she watched the dinothingy down Mr. Biglee. She exchanged nervous looks with Yori and the Wadebot, her normal equanimity shaken. She'd never seen someone die before, let alone in such a gruesome fashion.
"That's not good," the Wadebot offered. Wade, who looked queasy, was glad he was off-site for the carnage.
"It is regrettable," Yori agreed with the aplomb one would expect of a Yamanuchi ninja.
"So, the monster has now taken a life," Tricia barked into her microphone, secretly pleased at the huge ratings boost she was about to receive. After all, it wasn't every day that a blowhard was eaten by a rampaging prehistoric creature on a live broadcast. "What will be your next action, Doctor Flanner?"
Justine looked to the Wadebot by her side. "Wade?"
"Call Kim?" he answered.
"That would be regrettable …," Yori said, knowing much her companions did not. Kim Possible would most assuredly be ferociously tweaked if her evening were to be disrupted.
The dinothingy belched again.
"… But it might be necessary," she added as the thing began to lurch their way.
VI.
The Kimmunicator began ringing.
Beep-beep-be-beep
Beep-beep-be-beep.
"Oy," Kim groaned before giving Ron a rueful grin. Much to her surprise, he smiled back.
"Take the call, KP. Saving the world, it's what you do."
"No, Ron, it's what we do," she said before giving him a light kiss on the cheek. "Though you so just rocked my world, too." Then she got up from the bed, grabbed a stray shirt which she put on, and then answered the device.
"What's the sitch, Wade?"
"Is everything okay, Kim? You took longer than usual answering."
Kim rolled her eyes, though she was smiling. "Everything is spankin', Wade. Now spill."
"Justine Flanner called us in to deal with a rampaging dinothingy."
"Random much?"
"Not really. Remember the kinematic continuum disruptor you guys worked on in high school?"
"Unfortunately, yes."
"Yeah, well, Justine called, and it's been used. Yori and I thought we had things under control but, well, someone's been eaten."
Kim's brow furrowed. "Wow. That really is so the drama. Ron and I are on our way. We'll be there soon."
She hung up before Wade could ask any more questions.
Including why she was wearing Ron's shirt, which she took off and replaced with one of her own.
Ron, meanwhile, found a set of his own mission togs, grateful that Kim had wanted him to be prepared for any eventuality. The two were dressed, in the Kimminator, and on their way back to Middleton in no time.
VII.
"Hey!" Troy protested as he was unceremoniously dumped on the floor by his abductors, who quickly left the room.
He looked around. The space was dark, and the Senator's son was nervous; he didn't know where he was, why he had been sprung from the pokey, who had arranged for his unauthorized discharge.
Some time passed before the door opened, letting light into the room. Troy tried to shield his eyes and also squinted. His vision adjusted, and he realized he was looking at a woman.
A well-dressed woman with an attractive figure.
And a wicked smirk.
"Troy Bell," she said, her voice haughty and dismissive.
"You know me?"
"No. But I know who you are."
Troy noticed the way the woman was looking at him, suddenly felt uncomfortable, and then squirmed.
That elicited a smile from the woman.
"Yes, you'll do."
"Do? Do for what?" Troy sputtered. "What's going on? When my dad finds out what's going on he'll—"
The woman rolled her eyes. "Do what? Listen, Troy, I'm like, one of the five richest people in the world."
Troy scowled.
"You don't look like Paula Pandowdy."
The woman ground her teeth. "Whatever, I'm involved with the son of one of the five richest men, okay? I'm the reason you got to do that TV interview about little Miss Smug Mug."
"Who?"
"Ugh," she groaned. "Kim Possible!"
"Huh, so you have issues with Kim Possible? And you want me to help?"
"Actually, I was thinking you could glisten," Bonnie purred as she made her way into the room and closed the door behind her. After all, what Junior didn't know wouldn't hurt him …
VIII.
The Kimminator had made good time, especially with Kim at the controls. Ron had developed enough self-awareness to know that his GF was a much more reliable driver and pilot than he would ever be, especially after he had clipped the top of a maple just the previous week.
Approaching the commercial strip in Middleton, the two college-aged heroes were impressed with the scene below: rescue and emergency vehicles, their lights flashing, were present, along with various news crews and various and sundry spectators. Kim realized that she had failed to ask Wade just who had been eaten by the rogue creature, which was at the center of all the mayhem, rolling around the ruins of Cow 'n' Chow. She also realized that her tech guru had not volunteered the information. Her weirdar was going off when her ruminations were cut off by Ron.
"Man, that is the second strangest thing I've seen this week," he observed.
Kim, eyebrow arched, asked, "Only the second?"
"You would not believe what I see with the Dorm Crew," Ron shrugged. "The men's room in …"
"TMI!"
"Sorry, KP. I shoulda remembered what happens in Sturgis stays in Sturgis."
"Please and thank you," she said, relief evident in her tone of voice. Then she smiled at her boyfriend, "Now let's get this over with."
To be continued …