Chapter 9: Kira Ren

Rey had grown tired of playing nice. Last night she had claimed one of the things she wanted the most: her freedom, along with the power that belonged to her by birthright. Even if she wasn't particularly keen on claiming the name. She never asked to be Rey Palpatine. But given the fact that she had inherited that kind of power, it would be a tremendous waste not to use it as an advantage. And to protect those she cared about.

The conversation had helped to make up her mind. She descended from one of the most powerful bloodlines in the galaxy. Given that she couldn't change who she was, she would seize the opportunity and use it for good. Power was dangerous yet necessary to bring back peace to the galaxy. She wouldn't run away again, wouldn't go back to being a no one. Ready to prove she wasn't just a desert rat, this time she would behave as the apex predator she had always been meant to be.

The first step was gaining her master's trust. Following his rules wasn't something she particularly enjoyed, but she could play pretend in order to have her freedom back. Besides, she really needed to get out of her room, it was low key giving her claustrophobia.

The next goals were the trickiest ones. Rey hadn't really expected Kylo to actually listen to her demand to stop persecuting the Resistance. Who would have thought that the mercurial leader of the First Order could be rational after all? He hadn't exactly said yes, but he hadn't said a definitive no. She hoped that in time he could be persuaded. That might be the only way to save the lives of what was left of the Resistance. Rey didn't expect them to stop fighting either, but maybe, just maybe, she could convince them that she had a real plan that could be the definitive solution to the conflict in the galaxy.

She could reign alongside with Kylo… just like the offer he had presented her a long time ago. Only this time she was ready to step up. Back then she would have been his shadow more than his equal, but now she had her mind set on becoming a strong leader as well. Eventually.

Besides Kylo had told her many times that as a dyad, they were basically each other's equal. Her whole plan depended on him putting his words into action. It was an extremely ambitious goal, but she was willing to wait. And in the meanwhile, she would do anything in her hands to make it possible. Even if that meant becoming what she had sworn to destroy…

Rey desperately needed to contact the Resistance, but she couldn't do it without raising suspicions. She had to become the perfect apprentice. Extreme cautiousness was imperative. Besides, if she told them anything along those lines, they would immediately deem her a traitor or a lunatic. Wasn't she one? Maybe… damn, things had gotten so complicated. Her beliefs still aligned with the Resistance, but her current course of actions demonstrated the contrary. A desperate mean to an end. It would be extremely difficult to explain. She hoped that one day they would understand her decision, when looking at the bigger picture in retrospective. Leia might understand, if she ever got to recover. And Finn. Rey missed him the most. If anything, she knew they would be the ones most likely to forgive her. Perhaps even Rose and Chewie… after a long time. And Poe, not without several heated arguments before he actually listened.

Their company was what she missed the most. Of course, their adventures were absolutely thrilling, but at the end of any exciting mission, the memories she treasured the most were about their time together. Their jokes, their conversations, even their silliest arguments. Friendship. Oh, she would give anything to travel with them just one more time. To hear C-3PO's never-ending chatting, and of course BB-8 and R2's wits. As silly as it sounded to miss the droids.

Most of the time she just wished there was someone to talk about everything that was going on. A stupid wish, since none of the could ever understand her. Not even Finn.

Regardless of that, she promised that one day she would tell him the truth about her choices. And about her heritage. Not today, not soon, but one day. If she ever got to… she might be trusting too much that they would survive the most important they had ever faced. It was quite naive to believe that they could confront Palpatine and come back unharmed…

Rey would deal with those thoughts later. Right now she needed all the hope she could gather in order to face the darkness. She had Palpatine's DNA and the Dark side was strong in her. She could no longer ignore that part of herself. It was time to come in terms with her past, her fears and her inner rage. It might be the only way to truly heal the damage she had suffered, and the pain she would keep enduring. It was a hard pill to swallow, but she was slowly beginning to accept it.

However, as incredible as it might seem, Rey hadn't lost her strength in the Light yet. Rey hoped—maybe foolishly so—that she might be able to master both sides of the Force. She couldn't really choose one or the other. She wasn't Rey the Jedi apprentice anymore, neither was she willing to become a tyrant as Rey Palpatine. The woman she was had a dual nature she was just beginning to understand. Still uncomfortable on her own skin, but slowly accepting her nature.

And then there was the issue of him. Rey's heart pounded furiously against her chest even after Kylo left, just from the memory of his touch. She had finally given into her desires, tasting those lush full lips of his. Her impulses drove her decisions, something she hadn't allowed in a while. It was exhilarating, losing herself into the massive pull she instinctively felt towards him. It was everything she had expected. Maybe even better. For the first time in a very long time, Rey went to bed with a smile on her face. She idly touched her lips, as if trying to remember the way his lips had moved on hers. That's what kissing should feel like, she thought before falling asleep.

That night in bed her dreams were calmer, more pleasant. The morning after Rey only remembered fractions of those dreams, including the ocean she used to imagine. Only this time the colors were brighter and more vibrant. The midday sun was blinding and she felt the faint splash of water whenever the waves crushed against the rocks on the shoreline.

In the morning she headed to the bathroom to clean herself and then dress up. Then ordered a copious breakfast and sat down to scroll through her data pad. The scene showing a notification message with an attachment. After opening the files, she projects the images on a holo screen. There are a dozen sketches of black suits with a mask, every one of them with a 3D image that she rotate to see from every angle. The holographic mannequin resembles her in shape and body constitution. Although a bit skinnier and taller than she was.

Rey looked at her reflection on the floor-length mirror. She had grown some muscles with all the training. Her legs looked thicker, her arms more defined. And her hips had also become more round, since she could eat whatever she wanted at all times. That meant Rey usually got a second portion, even a third one sometimes. She looked stronger and healthier than ever before, no longer a scrawny scavenger. It had become a habit to admire her reflection every day after showering. It might have been a trick of the mind, but even her breasts looked a bit fuller. And her ass more round. The muscles were defined, but she still had the curves of an adult woman. An attractive young woman. Something she had never considered herself before, being all bones and skin during her teen years due to undernourishment. She was getting more aware of her appearance lately, her newfound confidence boosting her vanity. Her body now matched somehow the sense of power she felt.

Rey made herself focus on the projections on the holo pad. She explored the different options, fiddling all the possible combinations. The mask was atrocious. It was similar to Kylo's, but looked slightly off due to their different face proportions. Then there was the issue of the clothes. Rey utterly hated the capes, mostly because of the visions of herself as a Sith. Some garments seemed quite heavy, those would be useful in cold environments but uncomfortable in any other setting. The long skirts also seemed quite challenging to wear, especially if she wanted to run or fight in one of those. However, novelty stirred her curiosity. She had never had the opportunity to wear something like that before. Dresses weren't the smartest choice back in Jakku, due to both practical and safety reasons.

Her train of thought is suddenly interrupted by a knock on the door. A small demonstration of accepting the limits she wanted to draw. Kylo doesn't take too long to open the door after she gives him permission to get in.

—What is this?—Rey asks while projecting the image of the mask.

—Well, good morning to you too—she stares at him blankly as the corners of his mouth rise slightly in a faint smile—. You need something to protect your identity. Very few members of the First Order know what you look like. Most only know that you are a young human female, but they've never seen your face. It's best to keep it that way.

—I'd much rather not wear it.

—Anonymity is quite advantageous—Kylo's expression suddenly shifts as an idea crosses his mind—. Besides, do you really want the Resistance to find out that you are helping us by watching you face in propaganda?

—It's not like it will take that long before they figure it out—was it that much better if she tried to conceal it further?—. Besides, it's not like I have an alter ego to go by.

—You could create one. I'll present you as my apprentice, as well as one of the Knights of Ren, since I'm still their master. At least in name.

—Do I have to take your last name too?—she grimaced playfully.

—Technically it's not my last name. And yes—he smirks—, it adds to the effect.

Rey knows very well he's teasing her, the smug smile on his face only adding to her exasperation. She pushes him back halfheartedly. In spite of her annoyance, she doesn't really want to fight now. Not when he also seems to be in a good mood.

—Do I have to wear a matching outfit too?—Rey asks.

—Mmm… you can choose whatever you want, but I'd rather you wear armor gear. I'll make a few calls to find a tailor that can be to your liking.

—A tailor?

—Yes, it has to fit you perfectly and be comfortable for future battles.

—For real? I don't think I've ever had something made for me. I used to buy whatever second-hand clothes I could find. And sometimes I had to steal the fabric. The best suits I had, I sawn them myself.

—Well… that explains a lot—he frowns, but smiles quickly after.

—Rude!!!—she pushes him again.

—When have I ever lied to you? Or would your rather I start doing it now?

—A little sympathy would be nice.

—I don't do euphemisms.

—It's called having basic social skills.

—And you are one to talk.

—I still manage them better than you—she sticks her tongue out, a gesture she couldn't remember the last time she had ever done it. Maybe when she was 10 years old?

—That's quite bold for someone who barely managed to use the cutlery during their first weeks here.

—That's not true!

Her face was starting to blush, feeling mortified at his observation. Well, it's not like a scavenger orphaned girl from Jakku had the same opportunities to learn courtesies as the son of a princess. He had all the time to learn how to look poised and write in a pretty calligraphic style while she was barely managing to survive.

—You could learn all that if you wanted—it wasn't an apology, but Kylo was making som effort to fix the situation.

—I have no interest on becoming a princess—she was more than fine the way she was, not caring whether she horrified anyone else with her lack of refined manners.

—Who would, knowing you can become so much more?—he took her hand, softly caressing her knuckles.

—Didn't you say I would be just your apprentice in the public eye?

—For now. We'll see where things go.

Perhaps she actually had a shot at seizing the power. Rey didn't expect him to give up his hold on the galaxy now that he had it under control, which meant they would have to figure out how to work together as a team. As co-rulers.

Truth was they were completely in sync when it came to the battlefield, but they had never been able to agree when it came to tough discussions and decision making. That was the real challenge. That and her lack of theoretical knowledge about the way the galaxy worked. Sure, Rey had a basic notion of things as most people did. But she would need to learn about their State's organization, of their military forces, economy, the relationships between the different sectors of the galaxy…

—You know we don't rule alone, right?—Kylo asks rather sarcastically— Even the wisest leaders have counselors to rely on.

—I know, but I'd still like to have a better understanding of things.

—Sure, perhaps you could start attending the Council's meetings with me. Though I don't take responsibility for you dying of boredom.

It wasn't exactly a thrilling prospective, but it meant that he trusted her enough to let her know their inner functioning.

Rey also caught some resonating excitement on his side of the bond as well. He actually wanted this to work, but he was also a bit reluctant. She sought deeper into his mind, finding his apprehension linked to his fear of betrayal. Of course. A man who had never trusted anyone wouldn't accept a partnership so easily…

—I'm staying this time—she promised him. Rey tried to project her intentions to him, to show him that she meant it. That she didn't plan on overthrowing him.

He just nodded lost, to his own thoughts that he quickly shielded from her. His body grew slightly stiff. Please don't shut me out, Rey pleaded into his mind, not daring to say it out loud because of how vulnerable her voice would come out.

—I'm still here—she reassured him—. And I need you to trust me. In the same way I have trusted you to guide me as a mentor… as my…

Confidant? Close but not accurate enough. Friend? The word didn't set right with either of them. But she didn't know how else to call him. He wasn't her lover, was he? They had just recently become aware of the fact that they wanted each other in that way…

—As a dyad—Rey's heart skipped a beat when he completed her sentence.

Yes, that's the only right way they could describe its uniqueness.

After their daily training session Kylo brought Rey back to her room, where a humanoid-looking Wookiee waited for them.

—This is Niamh—he introduced the visitor—, a tailor that has served the First Order for years.

The female in question had the palest skin she had ever seen, almost with a blueish undertone, icy blue hair and dark eyes that had no white in them at all. She was skinny, but in an elegant way. Mostly because of her body proportions. The tailor was tall, at least a foot taller than Rey. She wore dark colors, but it wasn't black. Odd for somebody working for the Order.

The tailor scrutinized Rey from head to toe, though Rey saw no judgment in her eyes. More like measuring her with her gaze, thinking what to do with her. Rey felt exposed, not sure how to react to someone analyzing her body shape.

—You know the rules. And as a personal advice, she is my apprentice and she is to be treated with utmost respect. Understood?

—Yes, Supreme Leader—Niamh answered with a bow.

—Good. I'll leave you to it… and Rey, don't even think about planning anything with her. She's already been conditioned.

—I'm not like you, I wasn't even thinking of it!—Rey protests before he leaves, not even giving her a second look— Asshole.

—Behave, don't make me regret letting you out.

Rey rolls her eyes at that. Niamh's face is crossed by surprise and then contorts in something Rey thinks is a suppressed smile. A smile that fades as soon as Kylo turns his attention to her, making the tailor shrink.

—We'll be fine—Rey says before he leaves.

One look at the girl tells her how terrified she is. Rey can't help but think of how people will react in her presence, given whose apprentice she has become. Even worst, given her bloodline. Will people cower at the sight of her, or try to win her favor just because of who she was?

—Your excellence—Niamh bows.

—Please don't call me that—she almost chuckles at that term. Funny how a scavenger was now considered worthy of reverence.

—I'm sorry, how should I address you?—Niamh asks.

—Just call me Rey.

—I couldn't possibly. You are the Order's protégée, I can't disrespect you like that.

—It's okay, the Supreme Leader doesn't need to know. Besides I don't need any of this ridiculous reverence.

—I still don't think it's a good idea.

—I insist! Please, just treat me like any normal person. I'll handle him later if he's in a bad mood.

—Well, you are a brave one for sure—she lets out a nervous laugh.

—I'm used to it anyways.

The tailor puts her bag on the counter and takes some instruments. Rey looks curiously at the measuring tables and molds.

—Now, I need you to take a few layers off to make a few marks. Nothing permanent, they'll disappear with water.

Rey starts discarding most of her clothes, finally standing in her bottom underwear. The tailor moves behind her, correcting her posture before she starts marking some points on her skin. Rey is thankful that the woman seems to focus more on the process than on her body. Self-image issues died hard.

Taking a closer look, Rey noticed that the tailor's hands were trembling and she avoided eye-contact. She debated herself about wether it was a good idea to read a little bit into the tailor's mind. It was a damn habit Rey had taken after her time with Kylo. Tempted, she did some very superficial mind-probing. Nothing hurtful, just enough to sense her emotions. Niamh was scared of her, fearing she would be just like her master. He hadn't personally harmed the tailor, but she had witnessed first hand what his wrath meant for those around him. Many times. At some point the pencil she was using to mark her fell to the floor.

—I'm so sorry—the tailor said.

—It's okay. You don't have to be afraid—Rey answered, picking up the pencil. She could have just force-lifted it, but that would probably freak out the poor creature in front of her.

Rey decides to ask random questions about her job. She learns that this girl works with the designer who created most of the armor for both stormtroopers and the Knights of Ren. That they are used to working with technologies to produce comfortable yet very resistant materials. Then some technical explanations that Rey doesn't fully understand, but she lets the girl speak, since she's finally warming up.

After getting the girl to relax, she even starts to drop some gossip about the Order. About the generals and the counselors, many names Rey is just beginning to learn. Some other familiar names, including some gossip about Hux's peculiar taste both in clothes and men. About the affairs some troopers had with late Captain Phasma. Oh, she must know so many stories. Always a silent observer.

—I'm really sorry I won't remember you after, I was starting to like you—Niamh says after finishing the measurements.

—What do you mean?

—You have to erase my memory when I finish.

—But I don't want to-

—It's better for both of us this way. I'm not supposed to remember what you look like, specially your face.

—I'm so sorry. I don't want to intrude your mind.

—It's okay. I accepted this job knowing what it meant.

—It doesn't really sound like a good job.

—It has its ups and downs. I get to do what I like, have a stable job and a very generous pay. So please don't feel sorry for me.

—Has he erased your memory before?

—The Supreme Leader? I wouldn't know since I can't remember most of the times I had worked with him—Rey wants to slap herself for asking something so stupid, but Niamh doesn't seem to mind—. I know his every measure from the neck down, but I don't have any memories of what his face looks like. Or if he's even human, for the record.

—Oh. It sounds kinda odd to know so much about someone yet not knowing what they look like.

—Some clients prefer it that way.

—Are there others like that?

—Yes… I can't tell you whom exactly, but I used to work for bounty hunters a long time ago. Some of them never took their helmets off in front of anyone. Ever.

—I think I remember some…—Rey quickly stopped herself before she could say anything more revealing. Luckily her companion is smart enough not to pry.

After finishing the task, Rey compels the girl to forget her face. Though she makes a bold choice by only fogging the memory of their encounter instead of erasing it completely.

Kira Ren. That was the name Rey had chosen for the facade. The loyal apprentice of the Supreme Leader. And just for the record, the first woman chosen by a master of Ren. She wouldn't be training with the knights, but she would have their same status. Maybe even higher, since she was the first and only apprentice of Kylo Ren. He had told her what he knew about the Knights current situation and the master to whom they had recently sworn their loyalty. If that was true, the best thing she can do is avoid them. No one could know her true identity. She would never claim the name Palpatine as her own. But she could play her part as Kira Ren, the name the galaxy would know her for from now on.

Rey was pondering the possibility to hide under her future persona and maybe fake her own death. It would make things easier in the eyes of those who had trusted her as their last hope. As the last hero who could bring back peace to the galaxy. However, she discarded that ridiculous idea, since couldn't hide forever. Sooner or later people will find out. The resistance would find out. Specially given the fact that there weren't that many force-sensitive creatures left, even less with her natural affinity with the Force.

The public version of her story was that the Supreme Leader had found her in the Outer Rim, sensed incredible potential and offered her to join him and become his apprentice. She had shown such prowess that Kylo Ren himself offered her a position as his right hand, which she would take in time.

When he presented her to the High Council a couple days latter, Rey had scanned the minds of every attendee of the meeting. Most of them felt uneasy, some of them stared in utter confusion. These people had all sort of interesting ideas about her. That Kylo Ren had brainwashed her or vice-versa. That he had brought back one of Luke Skywalker's Jedi students and turned her to the Dark side. That she was an outlaw—a rebel, figured out the cleverest of them— who somehow was lucky enough to scape her old life. She would have to persuade their minds into believing another version. Some of the boldest ones thought that she was warming his bed, to put it into words that didn't involve her selling her own body to her master.

Well, that last guess wasn't that far away from the truth… but that was an entirely different discussion. Not even she knew what they were doing. Their relationship was so deep and yet so incipient in it's development…

Kylo Ren accompanied her to her room that night. Rey discarded the mask and the cape of her attire, as well as the heavy tunic that covered her from the neck down, and the knee-high boots. She reveled in relief as her body felt much lighter without those layers. She kept on the pants and the crop top that replaced the brassiere. All of the items were black as expected, save for some silver and red details.

Rey was discarding the clothes into a laundry basket when a pair of arms suddenly grab her by the waist from behind. She gladly welcomes his touch after a couple days without getting physical. Mostly because they couldn't risk being seen like that in public.

Kylo had also removed his mask, cloak and boots. Still too many clothes left, Rey thinks to herself with a smile. The idea of sharing her bed with Kylo made her both nervous and excited at the same time. It was frightening to realize how much she desired him.

She ignored every alarm pounding inside of her brain. Her fight-or-flight instinct was greatly surpassed by her wanton. Hence she took his hand and led him to the bed. It made her extremely nervous to know he was really there with her, no longer a projection of the force that would eventually fade away. They could take things quite far so easily, with nothing and no one to disturb them.

They sat side by side, neither of them sure of how to proceed. Kylo tentatively places an arm over her shoulders. It wasn't the first time someone had done that gesture to her, but it had always been a playful thing among her friends. It had never made her feel lightheaded before.

She remembers how Rose usually rested her head on Finn's shoulder whenever they sat together. Their interactions being the closest she had been to any kind of romantic touch, hence Rey figures she can copy them. Right now she wished she had more experience. Apart from some occasional coquetry to charm potential traders on Jakku, she had never bothered to learn how to flirt. Much less how to please another person. It wasn't necessary and she hadn't wanted to learn for anyone before.

Growing up with a different, more normal upbringing, Rey figured Kylo knew a bit more than her. Yet he seemed hesitant. No, not hesitant. His intentions with her were clear. Awkward might be a better word for it. Well, at least they could figure it out together.

Rey rests her head on his chest. Their size difference was bizarre. Even with her thicker frame from training, he was still quite massive in comparison. She couldn't rest her head on his shoulder as she initially wanted, not without sitting on top of him to reach it. Just the thought of it was enough to make her blush. For now she just delights in the feeling of his warmth soaking though the heavy black fabric.

A familiar sense of static fills the air once again. Rey knows they will be doomed from the moment she turns her face towards his. But she wants to stretch the moment just a little bit longer. Whether out of edginess or just wanting to savor the tension for a bit longer, she is not sure.

—I never thought we would end up like this—Rey suddenly blurts. Great, now she was verbally vomiting out of nervousness.

—I used to think the same not too long ago.

—What changed?—she was truly curious. After getting over with all that time wasted in denial, she realized that the intensity of his stare had been more than just hatred or thirst for power. It had always been intermingled with the simplest, most primal of desires.

—Trust me, I resented you for a long time even after you joined me—Kylo huffs—. But I guess we have come a long way, I can't hate you forever. No matter how hard I tried to convince myself that I did.

Rey dared to look up for a second, only to shy way from his stare again. Even if they had never lied to each other before, hearing that confession was a bucket of cold water. The sweet nothings they whispered at night had been mostly a mask for the hard truths that lied beneath. A way to cope with isolation, knowing too well they both wanted to make the other surrender.

—I used to tell myself the same… that I hated you. I did for some time… you hurt me in so many ways.

—I'm aware—aware, but not sorry. Well, she couldn't ask that much more from Kylo Ren—. And so did you.

—To be fair, it was in self-defense most of the time.

Rey's emotions get the best of her as she bites his neck a bit rougher than she initially intended to. She was frustrated from the pointless conversation, wanting to punish him in some playful way. The worst part of it all was that even their history together, she knew she didn't have it in her to hate him again. Not when she could feel his emotions as her own. The pang of pain that resonated with her own. As well as the need for that special connection. The need for each other.

But oh, the bite only served to fuel their mixed feelings even further. Rey stared at the angry red spot she had marked on his pale skin. She should be ashamed of her own lack of control, and yet she was satisfied with the result. She must have projected that thought, as Kylo grabs both of her wrists and pins her to the mattress.

—Didn't know you were into that stuff—Kylo whispers in her ear. He traps her earlobe with his lips, his hot tongue licking softly.

—Only because you deserved it.

The ambience changed quickly once again. Things had always gotten better once both of them stopped talking. Deep conversations were so damn tedious. They already had enough. This, however, was new and exciting. They had been in this position before, but under different circumstances. Rey was pleasantly surprised to find out that she actually liked having him on top when he wasn't trying to kill her.

—Is that so?— He sucked on the lobule of her ear, testing her limits once again.

But Rey wasn't about to coward. Instead she just shifts into a slightly more comfortable position and extends her neck. A silent dare.

—Why do you always have to be so difficult?—she asks.

—It keeps things interesting.

They sure have come a long way. Rey almost can't believe she's willingly letting him have the upper hand. Her enemy turned her master, turned into something else she didn't dare to put a label on yet.

Rey stares at the mark that had now fully developed on his neck. A hickey. She had given the mighty Supreme Leader a hickey. She can't help but giggle at the thought of his subordinates wondering how he got it.

—Now, this cannot become a habit between us—he sounded dead serious, but Rey just laughs louder.

—Where's the fun in that?

Every preoccupation she had about their lack of experience quickly disappeared. Turns out they just had to trust each other and enjoy the moment. Weird, how they now trusted the other enough to engage in this kind of… activities. No weapons, no armor, no fighting.

Kylo releases Rey's hands, resting his forearms on the mattress to support his body weight. A small mercy before lowering his mouth on her neck, leaving feather-like kisses that felt like touching a living wire. In the best, most exciting way possible.

Rey hears Kylo's breathing grows more elaborate by the moment. How could the sound of his breathing be so erotic? Just the sound of it and the warm air he exhaled was enough to make her skin sprout with goosebumps. And then he kissed the sweet spot behind her ear, drawing a soft moan out of her lips. She would have felt extremely embarrassed if she wasn't so lost into the moment. Instead, she just grabs a handful of his hair. Those luscious black curls she had always wanted to touch, just to find out if it was as soft as it looked. Indeed it was, it slid through her fingers like fine silk strands.

Rey lowers her head to face him, making him stop. His eyes look somehow darker than before. She tentatively opens the first buttons of his tunic to reveal more of his skin. Then she places one hand on his now exposed skin, soft except from the ocasional bump of scarred tissue. Kylo allows himself to let out a loud sigh at the contact, as if he had been starved for her to touch him like that. And perhaps he was, but he would never admit it.

Rey traps his lower lip between hers, forcing his head down into a kiss. Now that was what his thick lips were perfect for. The very feature he hated the most about his face was one of Rey's favorite ones.

Kylo's tongue grazed the hem of her lips in a silent request, which Rey gladly obliges. Their teeth clash for a moment, and it takes a couple attempts to figure out what they actually like. As their tongues explore the other's mouth, Rey can't help but blush at the wet sounds they were making. She also notices a weird fluttery feeling down her stomach… and then heat much lower than that.

He was all she could feel in that moment. Overwhelming, yet not close enough. Even though his touch satisfied her craving, it also created another necessity. One she wasn't sure she wanted to satiate at the moment. Instinctively she wanted to, but the voice of reason in her head urged her to stop. She wasn't ready yet.

Hence she gently untangles herself from his tight embrace. He seems disappointed but doesn't complain. Instead he just rests his head on the crook of her neck, slowly recovering from the high.

Rey's fingertips trace idle patterns on his scalp. A wave of calmness and pleasure comes from his side of the connection, enhanced by the way his body relaxed under her ministrations. It felt odd coming from him, but good nonetheless. Very good. So different from other times when he lifted his mental shields, when she could still feel the remnants of his raging thoughts whenever they became too overwhelming. This sense of tranquility, on the other hand, was a pleasant surprise.

It was in moments like this that Rey forgot about his past, who he chose to be… in that moment, he was just hers.

Feeling drowsy after the adrenaline rush finally drained, Rey pulls the sheets to cover their entangled bodies. Kylo falls asleep first. For Rey, on the contrary, it takes some time to disconnect from the alert state triggered by his presence. She's not used to go to sleeping with anyone. Much less to breathe with the weight of his head over her chest. But his soft breathing and the calm thrumming of his pulse help her relax into a dreamless sleep.

A/N: I'm sooo sorry for the long delay. Got dragged into the House of the Dragon fandom and then into the Throne of Glass series, but I'm back after that long break from the Star Wars fandom and I'll continue writing for those of you who still read the story.