SHADOW OF DEATH
Chapter 29: Thaw
Bucky Barnes began to dream. That was the first sign he was no longer frozen. He did not know how much time had passed or what all had been done while he was sleeping, but he did know he was no longer frozen. He slept and slept and slept. He couldn't get enough. Despite the decades he'd spent sleeping on ice, he still felt he had a deficit. The reprogramming of his brain seemed to have flipped a switch inside him and he needed to recuperate more than just his mind.
For awhile, when he woke, he found himself in a vast hospital complex buzzing with African doctors and nurses in brightly colored uniforms. Official looking (and sounding) people came and went - each battering him with the same questions.
"Who are you?"
"Where did you come from?"
"Where do you want to go now?"
"What do you want?"
As if he knew the answers. As if it was up to him to decide.
He felt like a computer which had been reset to factory settings and he no longer knew what his purpose was or which of the hazy wisps of memories were truly his own and which were interlopers on his consciousness. He remembered his past life... or lives... there was no question about it. What confused him was trying to delineate the chronology of events and trying to understand how they connected and where there were gaping holes in time or autonomy. Hydra had not only erased past memories. Occasionally they had implanted new memories or simply meddled for the hell of it and he felt as tangled and gnarled as an unrolled skein of yarn.
When he woke, there was so much noise, so many people, so much bustle of machines and flashing of lights. It inundated his mind like an oversoaked sponge and the only reprieve he found was in sleep. He wasn't sure how much time passed when he no longer woke in the hospital but instead in a grass-thatched hut next to a jade-colored lake. There were no machines, no tubes, no sign of medical equipment. He lay on a foam mattress covered by a blue and red plaid blanket. He found hot porridge, roasted meat, a banana, and a bottle of water by his bed when he woke, but no sign of where it came from.
He pulled the plaid blanket off his bed and tied it around his good shoulder. He could feel a hand's length covering of rough beard over his chin. He ran his fingers over his head and noted the brown locks reached past his shoulders. He placed his bare feet onto the smooth, compact dirt floor and ducked through the short doorway to seek out the world outside.
In all his days, both Before and After Hydra, Bucky had never made it to Wakanda. He had visited nearly each of their neighbors at least once and many (like the DRC and Sudan), far more times than that. Though, he could not claim to have actually "seen" them. He had existed in them. He had completed objectives and identified targets, but he never, not once, stopped to enjoy the scenery.
A flock of flamingos noisily flittered around the edge of the lake. The morning sun glinted off the banana tree leaves, and the red earth emanated with the scent of the past night's rain. A chameleon lazily climbed up a branch near his head and paused to let one eye drift over to appraise Bucky. Bucky bit back his amusement as he watched the creature's slow, awkward movements on the branch and Bucky came as close as he could to simply watch the reptile make its way to the end of its branch. Then he sank onto the grassy bank and lay his head against his knees so he could watch the flamingos play. Not for any particular reason other than he could. Warily, he looked over his shoulder again and again - not fully trusting that he could remain unmolested for long. At any moment, he expected one of his handlers to appear from the shadows to chastise him for escaping. They would take him back, wipe his mind, and make sure he never so much as even wanted to sit and watch a chameleon. The world be be reduced to missions and targets and nothing else. There would be no more flamingos. His senses, his body, his mind - they would all become the property of another and he could not even sit to enjoy the warmth of the sun on his skin or the scent of earth in his lungs.
He determined not to move from that spot for as long as he could, for as long as it would last.
His new "handlers" said he was "better" and that his "mind was his own." He knew better. A single moment could change it all and he would no longer fully inhabit his body again.
He was interrupted from his musings by the sound of a car engine and tires. He tensed his body and listened, but he did not move. Car doors opened and closed, low voices whispered in Kiswahili, and light footsteps approached. One set of footsteps - large, heavy footsteps- vanished behind the hut. Three other individuals - two wearing armor and carrying spears - approached him. The third, and lightest, of the footsteps proved to be the Wakandan princess. Princess Shuri was young - hardly a hair's breadth into adulthood. He had met her, along with the rest of the royal family, at a private luncheon with Dr. Okapi. The doctor had explained his conditions and treatments in depth. She had spoken little during his introduction to the family, but her eyes had spoken eloquently enough and he could read her curiosity there.
The old king - a patient, kind man- had given him a formal introduction to the small kingdom and told him of their "rules". The king and prince peppered him with questions before handing him off to a series of other officials, all with various tasks to help him "adjust" to Wakanda. In addition to his army of doctors and counselors and psychiatrists, there were also language tutors and cultural liaisons and the chiefs of various occupations.
"Everyone in Wakanda has a tribe they belong to which is determined by their occupation. You must choose which you will belong to," he was informed. He had time. They would give him a few months shadowing the different tribes before he had to decide if he preferred life as a soldier or a farmer or a craftsman or any of the other myriad of occupations available to him.
He knew which Steve would have chosen. It would have been easy. He imagined how Steve's eyes would have lit up at the opportunity to choose to be an artist. With such a view in front of him, Steve would have set to work immediately and painted the lake with such realism it would have appeared to be a photograph. Then he would have scrapped the whole thing and done an impressionistic representation instead - which would have somehow managed to capture the soul of his subject in his hazy brush strokes and lines.
Bucky sighed and a sharp pain ripped through his chest again.
Steve had been alive. All this time, Steve had lived... only to die a mere handful of months before Bucky could have crossed paths with him. All that time... Steve had been there. On ice. Just like Bucky. When he woke? Well, there was never a shortage of wars and one close scrape with death was never enough. Not even for Captain America.
Now, Steve was gone. Really gone. And the world was just as much a mess as it had been when he'd vanished the first time. And Bucky? Well, he was tired of it all. Tired of starting wars. Tired of finishing them. Tired of being cannon fodder for figureheads in suits and ivory towers, far from the stench of greed and gunpowder and blood.
He knew he did not want to be a soldier. Not anymore. He wanted to see flamingos flap their coral wings in the morning sun and watch papayas grow. He was worn sick of death. He just wanted to see things live.
He didn't know what ulterior motives this small kingdom had or what they would expect him to do. However, a few months in the quiet of the forest lake sounded right up his alley.
The princess wore a yellow and neon green dress and she ambled towards him with all the confidence of a general. She nearly glowed in her excitement when she saw him. Two female soldiers flanked her on each side. Their spears glinted in the sunlight and they impassive expression did not hide their anxiety at seeing him.
"Sergeant Barnes," she began and outstretched her hand to clasp his. "I am very glad to meet you again. How are you?"
"Ma'am," he said and nodded his head. "I'm well enough. And yourself?"
"Fine, fine. Fine, fine," she said, half-distractedly. "You find your lodgings to your satisfaction?"
He shrugged. "I've stayed in worse... and in better. I slept and that's all I need. I was comfortable and the view's worth seeing and that's better than any fancy room."
She turned towards the lake, taking in the green of the water and the lush foliage beyond, and she seemed to understand. "I am glad...," she said and she trailed off, obviously considering something carefully to herself. When she spoke next, her tone had lost all its hesitancy and formality and her words tumbled out like acrobats on a trapeze. "Sergeant Barnes, how does your arm work? What is it made of? Can I see it? How was it made?"
"You came here to ask about my arm?" he asked, amused.
"No... yes... no... a bit. You see, I came to ask you many questions, but that is the first that came out because I was looking at it," she said, slightly bashfully. She gave him a dimpled grin and came closer, much to the dismay of her companions. They trailed after her, each with a warning glance as the princess, which she ignored.
"You can look at it. I don't mind," he said. He sat back on the grass and held it out for her to see. She knelt beside him and began to run a small, handheld device over his arm and she babbled incoherently to herself as she read over whatever the display showed. For a time, it was almost as if she had forgotten he was there. Then, she began to pepper him with different questions - all without any underlying reason other than her curiosity. She asked him about his childhood games, his mother's cooking, his favorite places to visit, how he managed winters in Siberia, and what he remembered of 1970's fashions. Even when he failed to answer one question, she fired back with another until he surrendered and spoke.
Finally, she placed her scanner back into her pocket and lifted her eyes from his arm to his face. He wondered if she was analyzing his face the same way she had his arm. Then she grinned. It was a full grin which showed each of her teeth.
"Sergeant Barnes, do you enjoy science?"
"Science?"
"Yes. The study of the universe... do you enjoy learning new things and performing experiments and unlocking the mysteries of the cosmos? Do you like to create things and understand how things work?"
"Ummm, can't say that I do," he answered. "I never was much of an egghead and spent more time workin' than readin'."
Shuri cocked her head to one side and frowned. "Ah, it is too, too bad. Then I will not be arranging your marriage so very soon."
He spluttered in his confusion. "My... uh.. excuse me?"
She shrugged. "It is alright. Do not be concerned. You are very handsome, superhuman, a reformed villain, and born on Earth, and so I thought to arrange your marriage with my companion. It is no matter. I will simply ensure she is married to our alien prince instead.
"You, on the other hand, I have other uses for. I have started a collection of enhanced humans and I like you so you may join it.
In the future, in the very unlikely event that I become queen and Black Panther, I can take you as my second husband. Sawa? Then your citizenship in Wakanda will be very sure."
"Your... uh...," Bucky bumbled and he felt his eyes grow wide.
"See, Brother, you are my witness. He agrees," Shuri said over her shoulder to the trees behind the hut.
A sigh emanated from the shadows and a man emerged. He was clothed in a shining black suit and mask. A silver set of claws draped over his shoulders. He dropped to a crouch as he fell from a tree and then he pulled the mask off his head, revealing the face of the crowned prince.
"Shuri," said T'Challa in a warning tone.
"If you wish to follow me like a shadow than you must hear all a shadow hears," she scolded back, her arms crossed over her chest as she glared at him.
"You are making our guest uncomfortable."
"Hapana, T'Challa. It is you. How is he to be comfortable if I must bring two Dora Milaje and you along as bodyguards? I can take care of myself. I do not need all three of you to follow me about like mother hens."
" Within your first hour in the company of a former super soldier and assassin and your first impulse is to arrange his marriage... to yourself? I believe I am justified in following you around- even if it is to protect our guest from your meddling."
"If you keep on like this, I will be arranging your marriage next," Shuri said. Then she turned on her heels and began to make her way back to their vehicle. Before she was out of earshot, she called out a cheerful farewell.
"Good-bye, Sergeant Barnes. Don't worry. You and I will be the very best of friends first and we will only marry if my brother doesn't. I will be back soon so you can tell me more of Brooklyn."
"Can any stop the sun from rising?" her brother replied with an exasperated eye roll. He cast a final apologetic glance at Bucky and then followed after her to the car. Bucky listened to them drive away and he turned back to the chameleon. And laughed.
ooooo
"I hope you are prepared for a long walk, Dr. Foster," Loki said as they made their way through the lush palace gardens and towards the tunnel that would lead them outside the city and to the road out of Wakanda. "It will take time to arrive at the location where my magic regains its efficacy again."
"I could use some time out of the lab," she replied. "My head is spinning from too much time staring at screens."
As they passed by the space where the Mind Stone had seen its demise, Jane paused.
"Loki, why is Mjolnir still out here?" she asked. She walked over to it and ran her hand over one edge to rub off the drops of dew that had collected.
"It is waiting for its mistress, Lady Jane. You require your own warrior's weapon now that you are a shield maiden in your own right."
She gave him an inquisitive look. "You are only giving me half-truths. What aren't you telling me?"
He scoffed.
"Fine. I am unworthy to wield Mjolnir. Only those who the All-Father considers worthy can wield it. I never have been and never will be deemed worthy."
"That's better, but even still, your last statement is false, even if you believe it to be true."
"You suddenly feel compelled to wax philosophical?" he retorted, more briskly than was warranted.
"No," she replied with a dismissive shrug of her shoulders. "It is just what is."
She easily retrieved the weapon and admired its glow in the sunlight. She flipped it once in her hand before glancing down at herself.
"I suppose I will need some kind of way to carry it around with me. It's a little clumsy to hold it all the time."
"Thor had a magic belt," Loki said.
"Not exactly helpful - unless you know how to make a magic belt?"
"Unfortunately no. That was created through dwarven magic, forged along with Mjolnir on Nidavellir."
"Well, maybe I can use some rope to tie it to my back or something," Jane mused. "So, does this mean I can call down lightning?"
"Try," Loki replied with eyes too full of mischief for Jane to feel comfortable immediately obeying.
"What? Will I make us both explode or something?"
"I do not know," he answered, the mischief extinguishing from his eyes and replaced by simple curiosity. "That is why I wish for you to try."
Jane held Mjolnir over her head, as she had seen Thor do in New Mexico, and gave the sky above her a wary glance. The sun continued to glare back. No clouds gathered and no strikes of lightning answered the call.
"Focus inward, Lady Jane," Loki replied. "The power does not originate in the sky but within yourself. Mjolnir only focuses and magnifies your abilities - not create them."
Jane lifted the hammer over her head again and closed her eyes. As she did, a blue haze emanated from the hammer and engulfed her. She opened her eyes, which now glowed like super novas, and she floated above the grass and upwards towards the sky. She lowered the hammer upon a nearby rock and the rock exploded into thousands of pieces. She dropped the hammer from her hand as if it suddenly became superheated and the blue light extinguished immediately.
She knelt on the ground and rifled through the fragments of rock, fingering them with both her hands. She let out a huff of air which caused her hair to fly up in wisps. Then she lifted the hammer into the air again. The blue haze reemerged and engulfed not only Jane and the hammer, but spread to cover the pieces of rock as well. The pieces of rock floated upwards, as if Mjolnir were magnetic, and spun into a tornado-like funnel, faster and faster, until they collided together. The pieces fell to the ground again, but this time they coalesced together into the shape of a perfect cube. Jane dropped the hammer.
"I can see," Jane whispered as she stared at the cube. "I can see the very molecules and the forces holding it all together. It's as if I can sense the physical realities within objects as much as I can sense the inner perceptions of people. It's incredible. I could feel the sap running through the trees, the sun granting energy to the grass, and even the life force of each insect beneath our feet. I can feel what holds it all together…and…manipulate it... into something else."
Loki cocked his head to one side to consider her. He could recognize both overwhelming awe and intense reverence in her expression - so similar to his own experiences as a novice in magic. "We will need to develop your mastery of Mjolnir further, Lady Jane," he said.
She still sat slightly dazed but she nodded her head in agreement. Loki extended his hand to help her off the ground. She took it and grabbed Mjolnir on her way up.
"No doubt, we could spend the next decade in this very place exploring all Mjolnir is capable of but let us defer for now. We should continue on the task we set out to accomplish," Loki said.
He brought her to the garden wall enclosing the palace. Then he opened the electronic door leading into the tunnel. When the motion sensors caught their movements, a series of lights illuminated the passageway before them and they walked on a smooth concrete floor through the maze of tunnels. By Jane's lack of reaction, Loki assumed Shuri had introduced her to these tunnels already. He was relieved to see Jane's light footsteps did not struggle to keep pace with him.
"Loki, can I ask you a question?" Jane said as they walked.
"You may, though I may choose not to answer if the question displeases me."
"Why did Asgardians stop coming to Earth? From the myths, it sounds like they used to come and go quite often. What happened?"
"Ah! Yes. That is a tale. You are fortunate our walk is long."
"Good. I could use a long story."
"Well, long before my days, in the times of Buri, grandfather of Odin, and Bor, father of Odin, the peoples of all the realms intermixed freely. The longer living peoples of the other realms enjoyed coming to Midgard for sport and curiosity and trade and exploration. It was Bor who first established limitations on travel to Midgard. There were some from the Nine who would not hesitate to use their superior powers to dominate this realm, subjugate its peoples, and enslave the population for their own pleasure. Thus it was Bor who first declared Midgard a protectorate of Asgard and he forbid the denizens of other realms from unrestricted travel here. He set up, what you might call, a 'nature preserve' here to protect the weaker, short-lived creatures of this realm from being overrun with reckless, irresponsible members of other realms. Under Asgardian protection, Midgard was granted autonomy to do as it wished, without interference from any beyond their own realm."
"Wow. That's really patronizing," Jane said with an eye roll.
"Lady Jane, to the peoples of the other realms, Midgardians are little different than a colony of ants would be to you," Loki responded with a sideways glance. He smirked as he saw the predicted irritation flash across her features. "As you could with an ant, I could break a Midgardian arm with my forefinger and thumb. I am over a thousand years old and I am still considered quite young among most of the long-lived beings of the Nine. I can go for years without needing food or drink. If I use my magic, I could melt the entirety of New York simply by snapping my fingers. Your people are as strong as ants in comparison. It does not meant you are without worth, simply that you are small.
"You have seen the mighty ant hills that are built here in Wakanda? They stand as tall as a man and are harder to break than the trunk of a tree. Ants, when working together, can accomplish wonders. They are brilliant creatures able to carry far more than their own mass. They can hunt rats and devour the corpse of a cow if they work at it long enough and hard enough. In their short lifespans, and in their great numbers, they are quite admirable.
"Despite their stingers, architectural genius, and valiant hearts, they are still miniscule and short-lived in comparison with the lions and elephants that walk past their hills. To survive, some build symbiotic relationships with trees or other creatures stronger and larger than they. Your people are like ants among the Nine and if you wish to survive, you must remember that and learn to make your alliances just as wisely. "
"Alliances such as granting Asgard rule over us?" she scoffed.
"I guarantee you, Lady Jane, it has benefited your people greatly, though you may not see if from your perspective."
"Right, cause I'm an ant."
Loki tossed a grin at her as he cocked his head in the direction of the hammer on his back. "The bearer of Mjolnir can no longer be classified as an 'ant.' You have at least risen to the distinction of beetle or honeybee."
"Thanks. I'm flattered," she responded sarcastically. "Entomological comparisons aside, for our self-proclaimed 'protectors' we sure haven't seen much of you."
"Ah, yes. Well, during Odin's early reign, diplomatic relationships were still in place and emissaries from the realms were still sent to Midgard. This changed a few hundred years ago. Till then, the Aesir chose to interact with some of the strongest and most powerful kingdoms of Midgard, though, occasionally, less scrupulous diplomats chose kingdoms simply for their entertainment value. Later, Odin discovered that some of the emissaries misused their positions. The little natives saw them as gods and goddesses and worshipped them and brought them ever more lavish gifts to win their favor-and the emissaries rather enjoyed that.
"When Odin heard of their large harems and the sacrifices of blood and gold brought to the emissaries to seek their blessings, he forbid it and refused further emissaries other than of the Asgardian royal family. It was much later, when Thor and I were already of age and had traveled extensively through Midgard, that Odin halted even our unrestricted travel. When Odin totally abolished travel to Midgard, he spoke in the most veiled terms of the reasons behind his command. I was away in Alfheim much during that era and cared little for court gossip. Since I had no wish to visit Midgard again, I did not inquire much into the command. I am aware of no Aesir visiting Midgard since, well, since Thor's last visit to Wakanda, which must have been five centuries ago at least. Not until Thor's banishment."
Jane opened her mouth to ask him another question, but did not get the chance. Loki opened a final door with a flourish and sunlight stung their eyes.
"Here we are," he said as they exited the tunnel into the forests beyond. "You have reached the farthest edge of Wakanda and just over here begins the region where my magic becomes effective again."
Jane's eyes glistened in her excitement and she tugged on his arm. "Show me! Show me everything you can do!"
He arched an eyebrow. "Everything? Need I remind you of our purpose in coming... or that we are less protected here from my possible foes than we are within the boundaries of Wakanda?"
"Fine. Fine. Where is this thingy?"
"This 'thingy' is one of the most powerful objects in the Nine Realms."
"Well, then show me so I can see it for myself."
Loki pulled it out of his storage. The awed look on her face and over abundance of questions that action raised was enough to make him laugh.
"Now, Lady Jane, may I present to you the Casket of Ancient Winters, the treasure of Jotunheim," Loki said. He gave a slight bow as he held the glowing object up for her to gaze upon. "I beg you not to touch it, despite your curiosity. It may not react well with your warm Midgardian form."
She nodded and stared at it. "I can feel it," she said. "The power emanating from it. You weren't exaggerating. It is amazing. Can you make it work?"
Loki nodded. He felt the power flow from the ancient relic and, more unsettling, through him. He felt it search him out and call to him and sift inside of him as if seeking a conduit. He grit his teeth and tried not to think upon how his red eyes now saw everything before him through tinted hues. Then, he allowed it to dissipate and retreat back into the relic.
Loki couldn't help but cringe and turn away. The frozen banana palm tree before them showed the efficacy of the glowing Casket he held in his now blue hands, but the very hue of his fingers proved the reason he had not further explored the potential powers inherent within the Jotun treasure. She gawked openly at the frozen tree- its leaves perfectly encased in solid ice from the ground to its crown. She ran one finger along an edge and startled slightly as the leaf broke in half and fell at her feet. He felt Jane's curious eyes move to him and he sought to sink further into the shadowed forest to avoid her exploration of him in his natal form. She didn't mention it, but he felt the weight of her questions on him as if they were formed of lead.
"It is an unfortunate byproduct of the Casket that it forces me into my true form," Loki said, when he caught her trying not to stare. She did not look away but came closer, her eyes tracing the patterns in his skin and staring into the scarlet depths of his eyes. He looked away. "It is repulsive."
She froze in midstep and moved into his line of vision. "You believe that."
"Aye."
She frowned. "I don't see anything repulsive. I find you rather… well, beautiful."
She did not hitch on the word or move to correct herself and for a moment, Loki thought she had found a way to lie, but her eyes did not dim nor did she turn away.
"You believe that," he echoed, incredulousl.
"Yes."
"You would be the only one."
"No. I wouldn't," she said, with such a weight of assurance behind her statement that he had to believe her, even if it felt like swallowing a boiling hot potato. He gulped on the lump of his suffocating insecurities and did not turn away as she looked over every inch of him, still with that earnest intensity on her face.
"It is insufferably hot," he said, in lieu of commenting further. The humid equatorial sun burned through his Jotun skin and he felt himself in danger of overheating.
"How do you turn back?"
He sent the Casket away and with a wave of his hand, he was back into his Aesir form.
"Is that better for this weather?"
"It is still hot, but not as unbearable."
"It's good you didn't come to New Mexico. That was heat."
"Oh, but I did. Did not Thor speak to you of my visit to him?"
"Wait- you actually came? In person and not through projection or whatever you call it."
"In the flesh, though it was at night so I missed the true fury of your New Mexico sun."
"Probably for the best. If my subject matter didn't involve studying at night, I never would have survived it. I wish I could see the stars better here. Birnin Zana has as much light pollution as any other city, but we are far enough from any urban center that I could probably get a good view - if it wasn't for all these darn trees."
"Says the woman who was complaining of the heat only a moment ago. Need I remind you how much our discomfort would increase if we had no shade?"
"Says the man carrying around the most powerful air conditioner in the universe. Come on, bring it back out again so I can see it up close... and don't you for a minute think you can escape an in-depth explanation of just how you snap matter into existence out of thin air. In-depth, oh glorious Prince, and not the watered down version."
Loki gave a mock impression of a long-suffering sigh and wondered just how irritated she would grow the longer he dodged her desired explanation. He decided that the flash of anger in her eyes and the exasperation in her voice would be just enough recompense to ensure he spread it out over at least the next month. At her pointed stare, he made the Casket of Ancient Winters appear again and pointed it towards another tree.
She hefted Mjolnir into her hands again and Loki saw she meant to focus her new powers in understanding what she could of the Casket's capabilities. He reluctantly approved of her intention and pointed the Casket towards a small tree stump nearby.
Jane turned her brilliantly glowing face upon him. He placed the Casket down upon the damp grass, ceasing the flow of power from its turbulent heart. She ignored his previous warning and tried to touch the azure and cerulean swirls with her bare fingers.
"It will burn your skin with its cold!" he shouted out to stop her. She gave him a dismissive glance and tore a piece of cloth from her shirt. She used this to shield her skin from the now darkening box and ran her hand along one of its metallic casings.
"Did you ever figure out how to use it to transport you from place to place?" she asked.
He shook his head.
"I have some ideas," she said with a pensive, lost expression she so often wore when she was deep in thought. "Can we keep it in the lab for a few days?"
"As you wish," he said. He covered the Casket with his cape to carry it back across the border.
"You weren't quite right…," Jane remarked as she trailed after. "Back when you said that is your 'true' form. It is and it isn't. Both forms are just as much you. Neither is false. They are both Loki."
He missed his next step, but did not turn around. She did not explain herself further but left him to linger on her words.