The noise of the crowd in the food court was giving Carla a headache. Saturday lunchtime was probably the worst time to be here: it was crawling with families, babies screaming, older children, if anything, even louder, darting around between the tables in a complicated dance as they moved back and forth from the soft play area to their parents and back again. Carla wanted nothing more than to head back to the apartment, but Alniss didn't dare leave right after meeting Elsa, she was too worried about being followed, and Carla had to agree, even though part of her knew it was overly paranoid.

"You want something to eat?" Alniss asked, her voice flat.

That was just about the last thing in the world Carla wanted. "No. Thanks. You get something, though, if you want."

Alniss shook her head. "I don't want anything either. We could get something to drink, I suppose, then we can sit down."

Once they were both equipped with a can each of cold soda, which was somewhat soothing, they found a seat on the edge of the chaos, where it was slightly quieter.

"Are you okay?"

They both spoke at almost the same time, overlapping each other, and Carla smiled slightly, a bittersweet sensation spreading across her gut. Akhir and Jasmine spoke at the same time a lot, when Jasmine was confident enough to speak at all, and she was simultaneously pleased at the indication that she and Alniss were perhaps growing closer and upset at yet another reminder of Silrin.

They both nodded at a similar time, too.

"Yeah, I'm okay," Carla said quietly. "I've decided Jasmine's mad, though."

Alniss nodded. "I know what you mean. I'm still worried about her." She frowned anxiously. "I wish I had Akhir's number. I could see if Kalran would give me it, but she might ask why, and she'd probably say I was interfering in Jasmine's life. I suppose I am interfering, but I just don't see how any Yeerk can sit by and watch that without wanting to. Taking a calculated risk to meet someone for a greater gain, like you're doing... that's one thing, but what's Jasmine gaining from all this risk? She can't have anything in common with Elsa."

Carla shrugged: she had no idea either. Quite apart from their very different loyalties and views of the war, the two seemed polar opposites personality-wise. Jasmine so quiet, submissive, and Elsa... well, bossy did not even come close. Shaking her head slightly, she decided to change the subject: she was very worried how Alniss would be feeling about Elsa bringing up Silrin, it was far more important to discuss that than dwell on whatever Jasmine thought she was doing.

"Are you okay?" she repeated concernedly, trying to let her tone of voice hint at what she meant without saying it explicitly.

Alniss nodded, but the tension in her voice belied the gesture. "I suppose so. I just... I really don't understand why she said... it must just have been to try and keep our support. She must really care about Kalran. There's no way she cares about..." she trailed off. "Mind you, if she wants to get us on her side she could have been less rude to me."

"You were coming across a little..." Carla hesitated. "Well, Yeerk-y. I guess she just didn't like that."

Carla immediately regretted her words, as Alniss stared at her.

"What do you mean?" Alniss sounded surprised, but not angry, which was a relief.

"Just... I suppose telling Jasmine what to do. And telling Elsa to be silent, that was kind of..."

Alniss frowned. "I don't remember saying that. Did I?"

Carla nodded, surprised that Alniss didn't recall it. "You didn't notice?"

"It must just be second nature," Alniss said, with a sigh. "I never had a host as resistant as Elsa, but I sometimes had to silence my Hork-Bajir."

Carla's face drained of colour. Silrin had shielded her host from it during the war, but afterwards Carla had learned some of the less obvious ways the involuntary hosts had been kept in line. She'd never sought the information intentionally, but there'd been snatches of interviews on the radio, TV shows that featured it at unexpected moments... bits and pieces she couldn't help hearing, that built up a picture. People who had had their worst memories played over and over again, or forced to endure realistic visions of hurting their loved ones against their will. Mostly as a punishment for some small transgression: distracting their Yeerk, managing to break through their control for a moment, resisting the guards and so humiliating their Yeerk master... but sometimes even when they hadn't done any of that, with Yeerks who had been particularly cruel.

"What do you mean, silence?" Carla asked, her voice choked with fear. She wasn't sure how she would react if Alniss described doing something similar, and waited with baited breath for the other to answer.

Alniss frowned. "Just told her to be silent. That was all that was needed."

"Always? Did you ever... punish her?" Carla whispered, looking down at the greasy surface of the table rather than meeting the Yeerk's eyes as she asked the question.

"No," Alniss said after a moment. A note of worry had crept into her voice for the first time, perhaps as she realised what Carla was asking. "I never needed to. She'd had Yeerks before me, she... she knew what I could do if I had to."

Carla gasped. "Had to? Why would you have to do anything like that?"

"I never did!" Alniss protested, suddenly looking very uncomfortable. "I'm not even sure if I could have done, but I never had to find out. Thankfully."

Carla looked away, across the food court, trying to slow her breathing, keep herself calm. Part of her protested that it had hardly been Alniss' fault; she knew enough about the culture of the Empire to know that giving a warning was practically generous, that a Yeerk that didn't punish a resistant host in some way was quite a rarity... and yet... while she believed Alniss had never actually done anything, even to make the threat was bad enough.

Carla slowly let her gaze move back to Alniss, meeting the Yeerk's eyes. To her slight surprise, they were filled not only with pain and concern, but with shame, and she realised Alniss felt guilty. That realisation seemed to open the floodgates for others: she remembered how much Alniss had lost, and despite that how kind she'd been to Carla, everything she'd done, and she felt her face soften, melting into forgiveness. She reached across to take Alniss' hand.

"It wasn't your fault," she said softly. "And you didn't actually do anything."

"Still..."

"You wouldn't have done it, either," Carla said confidently. "I don't believe you could have hurt your host, even if they'd ignored you. You're not like that."

Alniss gave her a grateful look, squeezing her hand. "Thank you for understanding."

There was a long silence. Though silence was perhaps not the right word, given the cacophony of noise still bombarding them from the food court. Carla drained her soda, trying to concentrate on the feel of the cold liquid moving down her throat, trying to let it block out her uneasiness, her irritation at the noise around her, and the sense of guilt that was building within her. Poor Alniss had had to go through enough today, without her bringing the subject up.

"What should I have said to her?" Alniss asked suddenly, breaking the silence.

"Your Hork-Bajir?" Carla guessed. "Look, Alniss, forget I said anything, it really wasn't your fault, I-"

"Not her. Elsa. You said I sounded too commanding... what should I have said?"

Carla shrugged. "Don't know, really. She probably wouldn't have taken well to you giving her an order, however it was phrased."

Alniss rolled her eyes slightly. "No." She shook her head, despairingly. "That human doesn't know

how to take kindness. Silrin was so good to her, she wouldn't even ask her to stop her yelling-"

Alniss trailed off abruptly. It was probably something to do with the way Carla's face had tightened: shocked, she stared at Alniss. The thought of Elsa screaming at Silrin for her freedom was a very uncomfortable one, and Carla battled the guilt, trying not to let it completely overwhelm her. The casual way Alniss had mentioned it had shocked Carla; not to mention that she'd called it kindness, not to order Elsa to accept her fate silently. Carla shuddered involuntarily, unable to meet Alniss' eyes.

"Carla?"

"It's nothing," Carla said quickly.

Too quickly, perhaps, as Alniss did not sound entirely convinced when she replied: "If you say so."

"What!" Kalran looked utterly astonished, her eyes flicking between the two of them in disbelief.

It was the same evening, and the three of them sat in Carla and Alniss' room, perched on the beds. Carla had spent much of the afternoon thinking over Elsa's proposal of meeting with her, and had slowly begun to come around to the idea. Not to say it didn't still fill her with dread, but she could see advantages. It would allow her to help with a lot more of the campaign, and as long as she made sure it was in a fairly public place it was probably safe enough, a conclusion that had been strengthened when Kalran had relayed a message to Alniss from Jasmine to say she had arrived home safely. Carla had been relieved to hear it: she might not get along with Jasmine, and she was pretty sure she was less paranoid than Alniss, but she'd still been worried.

"Really, Carla? You know you don't have to do this. Oglud would never ask it of you. Nor would I, for that matter."

"I know," Carla said, as calmly as she could. She felt a small smile tug at the edge of her mouth at the mention of Oglud. She'd enjoyed her visits to the Pool more and more over the last few months, and she was beginning to feel as though she knew Oglud quite well, despite only speaking to the through Kalran's translation.

"What business is it of theirs?" Alniss snapped.

Underneath the anger, Carla thought she could detect more than a hint of pain, and hastily reached for Alniss' hand, pushing the smile that had begun to slip onto her face back down. She suddenly wished Kalran hadn't mentioned Oglud: Alniss tried to hide it, but Carla was pretty sure she was jealous of the other Yeerk, and she'd had quite enough difficult emotion to endure today. Carla let herself slide closer to Alniss' side and squeezed the hand she held, trying to reassure her when she couldn't raise the subject aloud.

"Well, it isn't, I suppose. But they're one of the Yeerks Carla's doing it for, and the only one she knows in person, so I just..." Kalran trailed off. "It doesn't matter, anyway. Carla, are you sure?"

Carla nodded. "Yeah. I'm not exactly looking forward to it, but it needs to happen, I think. We need to coordinate stuff properly."

"Well, if you're sure." Kalran nodded hesitantly. She looked across at Alniss. "How do you feel about this?"

Alniss didn't reply for a moment, a mix of emotions flickering across her face. Kalran looked embarrassed, and opened her mouth, looking like she might try and change the subject, or apologise. Before she could speak, however, Alniss suddenly burst out with: "She told us she was sorry. About... about Silrin." The last word was delivered in a choked whisper.

Silence reigned for a few moments, broken only by Kalran shifting uncomfortably on the bed opposite them. Carla rubbed her thumb across the back of Alniss' hand, and felt her squeeze Carla's fingers in response.

"Schrellatie," Kalran said softly, slowly reaching across the space between them to touch Alniss' shoulder. "That must have been so difficult for you."

"Was she making fun of us?" Carla directed her question to Kalran. "You know her, right?"

Kalran nodded. "I know her a little, yes. And no, I can't imagine her doing that for a moment. She'll have meant it."

"How can you be so sure?" Alniss asked. The question seemed genuinely curious: there was no trace of accusation in her tone, as Carla might have expected a few months ago.

Shifting uneasily, Kalran responded: "I... I was the one who told Elsa about Silrin. Unintentionally, I'd thought she already knew, but... she called me the next day, to talk over her feelings. I'm not going to tell you what she said, that's not fair, but she wasn't making fun of you."

"She needed to do that? Is she alright?"

Alniss' question seemed automatic, concern lacing her tone, and Carla stared at her in surprise.

Kalran nodded, smiling slightly. "She's fine."

"Why do you care?" Carla asked, trying to keep her question casual, not to betray her astonishment.

"I don't," Alniss responded, the emotion draining from her voice as quickly as it had come. "Why would I?"

Kalran's smile grew slightly wider. "You do realise no-one's going to report you for sympathy, don't you? There're no sub-vissers hiding in the wardrobe."

Alniss looked down at the floor. To Carla's surprise, she didn't snap at Kalran. "I know. But why? Why under the Kandrona should I care about her? She's given me nothing but pain."

She looked so miserably bewildered by it all that Carla couldn't stop herself trying to help. "Silrin cared about her, too. She tried not to show it, she didn't really talk about it, but I could tell. It isn't just you."

Alniss nodded slowly, turning towards her. "Yes. I know. She cared about her far too much, in my opinion, she started to say things. Dangerous things." Alniss shuddered. "Asking how she could justify imprisoning her, that kind of thing. I kept telling her, if anyone else heard that she'd be in front of her sub-Visser on sympathy charges, and she said she wouldn't say anything where anyone else could hear it... but I was still so worried about her."

Carla's eyes widened with surprise. She hadn't known Silrin had had any peace movement sympathies... she'd known she was kind, that she cared about humans probably more than she was supposed to, but she hadn't realised she'd gone as far as criticising the Empire's actions aloud. "I didn't know that."

Smiling at her, Alniss stroked the back of Carla's hand with her thumb. Affection shone in her eyes, and Carla felt her own mouth lifting into a smile as she gazed back.

"She was quite a different Yeerk when she was with you. She said she was finally doing something good with her life, that she felt she was helping you. I was still worried, though, she spoke about you with such warmth that I was scared she'd still get accused of sympathy. You're really not supposed to say your host is braver or stronger than you are, and Silrin implied that to me on multiple occasions."

Carla flushed, unable to help her grin as she cast her eyes down to the floor, embarrassed. "She was so silly. She was the brave one."

"I can see what she meant," Kalran said softly. "You've been so courageous with all this. I still can't quite believe you're willing to do this meeting."

That reminded Carla of the real reason she'd sat down to speak with Kalran, and she raised her eyes to meet hers. "Kal? Look, I know you don't want anything to do with the campaign but... will you come?"

"To the meeting?" Kalran frowned at her. "Yes, of course, if you want me to. But I'm... I'm still not ready to be part of the campaign. I doubt I could contribute much."

"It isn't for that," Carla said quickly, to reassure her. "It's just that... well, you're the only person I know that we all like. Elsa gets on OK with you... I just thought it might help if there's someone there we all have in common. Especially if Elsa comes on her own... and I don't want any other involuntaries there. Elsa might feel a bit..." she trailed off, unable to articulate what she meant, but Kalran seemed to understand anyway.

"I'll come," she said slowly. "I think I'll need to support Elsa more than the rest of you: you and Alniss have each other, and so do Akhir and Jasmine. I imagine Elsa might need someone, even if she won't admit it."

Alniss nodded, glancing across at Carla. "Thank you, Kalran. You're right, Carla, it would make things much easier."