The Vampire King laughed in triumph as he saw Shaggy transforming into a scraggly-looking werewolf once again.
Shaggy, on the other hand, was horrified about the beastly howl he'd just let out. He couldn't believe Dracula had succeeded. Compared to this, his past worries of being caught by an angry doctor and running away from jewel thieves seemed insignificant. He could run away from his previous problems quite easily, but this was one of the first problems that running away didn't seem to be doing much for. No matter what he did or where he hid, Dracula seemed to be able to find him and his friends.
Shaggy believed there was no greater sense of helplessness than feeling you had no control over your own circumstances. That is, until he realized that feeling like you had no control over your situation and knowing you were putting your loved ones in danger was a far more empty, horrible thing to be feeling.
"Come on, Shah-gee. Ve have much to take care of!" Dracula replied. He seemed as if he was so excited that he could barely hold back his glee.
The young werewolf attempted to fight and struggle as Dracula grabbed his furry body, but to no avail. Dracula proceeded to drag Shaggy back to his Bat-Copter. Scooby, Scrappy and Googie looked back at their friend with horror from the net they were captured in.
"Oh no, Shaggy!" Googie cried out in a panic.
"Raggy!" Scooby whimpered.
"Hey! You meanies can't get away with doing that to Shaggy!" Scrappy snapped.
"But I already have gotten avay with it!" Dracula chuckled cruelly. "Hunch Bunch, ve have a new verevolf!"
The Hunch Bunch snickered evilly in response.
"Only a short distance left to the castle!" Brunch exclaimed.
"Like, oh goodie. I can't wait." Shaggy replied in an extremely depressed voice.
"Okay, so you got your wish!" Googie cried out in rebellion. "What are you going to do with us now? We already drove in your stupid Monster Road Rally."
"Oh, you'll see!" Dracula cackled, before directing his attention back to the Hunch Bunch. "Crunch, press the button and start the plane!"
"Olkkay, bhoss." Crunch blathered. He promptly pressed a button that sprayed windshield wiper fluid in his own face.
"Not that button, idiot!" Dracula insulted. "The other one!"
"Sorry!" Crunch apologized, as he pressed the button to the left. Shaggy nearly lost his balance as the plane took off, forgetting how it felt different to try to balance yourself with paws rather than feet. Dracula and Brunch headed up to the cockpit, presumably to help Crunch with whatever screw-up he was bound to make next.
"What do you think he meant by that?" Scrappy asked once Dracula was out of earshot.
"Oh, like, who knows? I can get you guys out of that net. That's probably the one thing I can do for you right now." Shaggy deprecated, feeling a pang of sadness and fear in his heart. He couldn't believe he'd gotten his friends into this awful situation again.
"Shaggy, it's okay. You didn't do this." Googie comforted, patting her boyfriend on the shoulder as he began unwrapping the net. Dracula appeared to have tied it to some sort of metal fixture on the ceiling.
"Without me, you guys wouldn't, like, even be in this mess. Kinda makes a guy feel responsible." Shaggy responded. He quickly was able to get the net unraveled from the fixture on the ceiling.
"Thanks, Shaggy!" Scrappy exclaimed, as he bounded out of the net once it fell to the ground.
"Reah, ranks Raggy!" Scooby added.
"Shaggy, you couldn't help getting chosen by Dracula as the next werewolf for his Monster Realm!" Googie's comment came off in a scolding voice, but he knew it was for his own benefit. He knew he was being hard on himself, but he felt it was warranted.
"If only I remembered the damn spell to get out of this." Shaggy cursed, so confined by the panic in his mind that he didn't fully respond to what his girlfriend said.
"It's okay, Shaggy. The spell may not have even worked a second time." Googie assured. "And I'll say it again, we don't blame you for this."
"Yeah, I know…but you, Scooby and Scrappy shouldn't have gotten pulled into this. It's me he wants! You all should be, like, living your lives, not caught up in this mess with me!" Shaggy replied emotionally. He could feel a tear or two well up in his fur-surrounded eyes.
"Shaggy, you're a part of our lives!" Scrappy reminded. "We've always got your back, no matter what kinda nutso situation you get yourself in!"
"Yes, Shaggy." Googie's tone was very serious and insistent. Shaggy knew this was because she was worried about his poor self-esteem, but he was pretty sure being directly responsible for your friends being kidnapped by the King of Vampires was a good reason to have low self-esteem. "Don't blame yourself for this. If anything, you should blame that fiend up in the cockpit."
Shaggy realized he couldn't really argue with his girlfriend, because she was right. He hadn't directly done anything that made Dracula target him. He'd just been the victim of bad happenstance. Still, he couldn't shake this feeling that trouble followed him everywhere he went. Whether it was meeting monsters seemingly everywhere he went or causing a carnival owner to chase him in a blind rage, he felt like he attracted danger like a magnet.
Typically, this was the sort of thing he kept bottled up inside and didn't talk with anybody about. However, the situation was intense enough on its own that it didn't feel nearly as scary for Shaggy to reveal that sort of personal vulnerability.
"I mean, like, you're right, but…" Shaggy could see Googie's eyes light up when he said he was right, before shifting to a worried expression when he said the word "but."
"But what?" Googie inquired.
"But…I always, like, seem to attract trouble, so I must be doing something to make trouble follow me."
"Oh Shaggy." Googie said as she wrapped her arms around her boyfriend to comfort him. "Everybody has problems."
"Problems that involve Dracula pursuing you to turn you into a werewolf?" Shaggy questioned.
"Well…some people have bigger problems than others." Googie replied with a light chuckle, before her tone immediately switched to being more serious again. "But you can't blame yourself for that. It's not your fault."
While Shaggy appreciated Googie's attempt to comfort him, he found her remarks to be somewhat dismissive. "Everybody has problems" didn't even scratch the surface of the many months Shaggy had been feeling like a burden to everyone he knew.
"I must, like, be doing something to always be getting into trouble!" Shaggy cried out in frustration.
Googie had a look in her eye like she wanted to give a response, but nothing came out of her mouth for a moment.
"I don't want to hurt your feelings, Shaggy, but…" Googie trailed off once again, her eyes looking like she was deep in contemplation about whether to finish her sentence or not.
"But what?" Shaggy asked. "Like, just be honest with me."
Googie let out a defeated sigh. "I guess from my experience with life, trouble seems to follow the people that don't know how to deal with it."
"Zoinks!" Shaggy exclaimed, his hair standing up on end with fright. "You mean, like, trouble knows I don't like it?"
"No, Shaggy." Googie let out an amused laugh. "I just mean that everyone deals with trouble. It's just one of those things that if you know how to deal with it, you won't get into as much trouble. If you don't know how to deal with it, it tends to keep following you until you deal with it. Does that make sense?"
"Yeah." It took a moment, but Googie's explanation kind of clicked in Shaggy's head. It felt far easier to run away from danger than actually face it head-on, and Shaggy had never really had a situation where he actually dealt with a serious problem without running away. "Like, yeah, that makes sense. I don't like dealing with problems. Problems kinda scare me!"
"It's healthy to deal with your problems though, Shaggy." Googie reminded. "Problems are a part of adulthood."
"Like, adulthood scares me too!" Shaggy gulped, shivering a bit at the thought of it. "Like sometimes, I still feel like an overgrown teenager!"
"We all do." Googie said. "Society makes it seem like you'll have everything figured out after high school, but hardly anyone does. Everyone moves at different paces, and there's no shame in that. Adulthood is basically just a journey of learning how to deal with all the curveballs life throws us."
"Yeah, like I guess you're right…but I wasn't expecting life to throw me the curveball of having Dracula try to turn me into a werewolf!" Shaggy gulped.
As if on cue, Dracula popped out from the cockpit at the front of the plane. Behind him, Brunch was lugging a large cannon with both hands.
"Alright, ve're almost back at my castle. Don't try to escape, Shah-gee, or you will face the consequences of my Crunchy Cannon!" Dracula threatened. "Brunch, fire the cannon to show them!"
"Right-o, boss!" Brunch replied in his thick British accent, as he pulled a lever on the cannon, which shot out what appeared to be razor-sharp rice krispies.
"Like, where do you get these weird weapons?" Shaggy shook his head in disbelief.
"I get them at the Vacky Veapons Varehouse! Speaking of vhich, ve should stop vhile ve're flying past." Dracula turned his attention from his prisoners to Crunch. "Crunch, stop the plane!"
"Ohkay, bhoss." Crunch's voice could be heard shouting from the cockpit. Suddenly, all the lights shut off inside the plane, leaving everyone in complete darkness. Shaggy scrabbled to cling onto something with his claws as he felt that the plane was falling.
"Not that vay, stupid!" Dracula snapped.
Crunch blathered a bunch of nonsense in response that sounded like something to the effect of "what'd I do wrong?"
"Old bean, you're supposed to slow down the plane to make a landing first, not completely shut it off!" Brunch scolded.
Googie, Scooby and Scrappy all let out yelps as the plane began freefalling rapidly. Even Dracula sounded frightened.
"Turn it back on, before we crash!" Dracula shouted in a frightened frenzy.
As soon as Crunch undid his bumbling, the lights quickly turned back on, and Shaggy could feel the plane stabilize.
"I'll land the plane, sire." Brunch quickly popped his head out of the cockpit, prior to returning to assist Crunch before he bungled things yet again.
Thankfully for Shaggy and his friends, Brunch was able to land the plane without nearly crashing it as Crunch had.
"The three of you stay here!" Dracula demanded, pointing at Scooby, Scrappy and Googie. "Come vith me, Shah-gee!"
"Like, if you say so." Shaggy shrugged, as he followed the vicious vampire. Once Dracula led Shaggy out of the plane, a large warehouse loomed ahead of them in the night sky. The words "Wacky Weapons Warehouse" were embroidered on the front of the building, and were illuminated by two streetlights on either side.
"This is the best place I know of to buy vacky veapons!" Dracula exclaimed. Shaggy wasn't even really sure how to answer this. Was Dracula making small talk with his prisoner?
"Like, it's the only place I know of to buy wacky weapons!" Shaggy chuckled nervously.
A sneaky-looking man wearing a purple trench coat and a large puffy hat stood at the door to greet them. He wore flying goggles atop his hat.
"Welcome to the Wacky Weapons Warehouse! My name is Dick, and I'm here for all your wacky weapon needs! This is my associate." Dick pointed down to a mischievous looking dog, who let out a high-pitched giggle.
"This is the guy I got the idea for our Monster Road Rally from!" Dracula informed Shaggy.
"Like, you don't say." Shaggy nervously gulped.
"Are you looking for anything in particular today?" Dick asked.
"No. I just vould like a new vacky veapon for my arsenal." Dracula replied.
"Well, I have the perfect ones for you!" Dick exclaimed, as he motioned for Dracula and Shaggy to follow. After walking past a number of aisles, Dick brought them to an aisle with a sign that informed passersby that these products were "new, new, new!" Dick motioned for them to turn down the aisle with the ostentatious sign.
Upon entering the aisle, Shaggy saw all sorts of strange contraptions: some type of old weapon that needed gunpowder, a large gun that looked like some sort of a bazooka, and something that appeared to be a rocket launcher.
"We just got a new shipment of the wackiest weapons out there. Introducing…the Mustard Brand!" Dick informed.
"How do they vork?" Dracula inquired.
"Why show you when I could show you…or… you know what I mean." Dick bumbled, as his dog let out a high-pitched laugh of amusement at his partner's lack of language agility. He took a small remote out of his pocket and pointed it at the TV above the aisle. A video promptly started on the screen, which involved a man in a backwards baseball cap and baggy clothing saying "Mustard on that heat, ho." The scene quickly shifted to another man in a suit and tie.
"Are you bored of the failure of traditional weapons to amuse you?" the man asked the audience.
"I know I am." a random man walking by on the street replied in the video.
"Then it's time to ketchup with your weapon advancement and choose Mustard brand weapons!" the man continued. "We've got three brand new weapons to arm and entertain you! We've got the Dijon Destroyer!"
The camera shifted to a woman holding a large rocket-launcher-like weapon. She pulled the trigger, which caused the weapon to squirt out a goopy brown mustard. Upon hitting a nearby mailbox, the dijon mustard caused the mailbox to explode instantly.
"The Mustard Musket!" the man continued.
The scene then shifted again to a brown-shirted man angrily pulling the trigger on an old-timey looking weapon directly at another man wearing a blue tank top. The weapon shot out a ball of mustard, which sprayed all over the other man's face.
"Oh god, there's too much mustard!" the recipient of the weapon's fury shouted.
"And our top-selling product, the Brat-zooka!" the salesperson concluded.
The scene then shifted again to a different man in a cowboy hat holding a bazooka right in the face of another man. It was very clear that these were hired actors due to their very poor acting skills.
"I've got a hankerin' to injure you badly, sir." the hat-wearing man awkwardly threatened.
"I'd like to see you attempt that crap, comrade." the other man replied in an equally stilted fashion.
The man in the cowboy hat pulled the trigger, which shot a fully-cooked brat into his mouth.
The other man looked strangely satisfied, as he chewed the brat. "Mmm. That sure shut me up!"
The deep voice of a narrator began to speak as the man continued ingesting. "But little did John know, Bob had secretly poisoned that brat an hour ago!"
The other man, John, began suddenly choking and coughing wildly until he passed out on the ground. Bob then pulled out a mustard bottle which the camera revealed he had on a holster on his belt, and proceeded to cruelly smirk as he squirted the letters "RIP" in mustard over the man's dead body.
The camera then switched back to the salesperson, who continued his promotional spiel. "With Mustard brand weapons, you'll relish in all the delightfully wacky features that will make you say 'hot dog!'"
A disgruntled young lady then walked into frame, crossing her arms. "Dan, for god's sake, I'm warning you! Stop with the terrible hot dog puns!"
"This advertisement has been a Mustard production. Now, I better go talk with my girlfriend before she leaves my sorry buns!" Dan exaggeratedly winked at the camera with an ostentatiously delighted grin.
"Like, what the hell did I just watch?" Shaggy shook his head.
Dick's dog let out another high-pitched giggle.
"So, does anything interest you?" Dick wondered.
"Hmm…" Dracula tapped two fingers on his face in contemplation. "I'll take the Mustard Musket and the Brat-zooka. How much vill it cost?"
"Only a mere $500!" Dick informed.
"$500? Vhy, I remember it vas just $400 for a very similar veapon only three hundred years ago!" Dracula challenged.
"Well…I could give it to you for $475." Dick offered.
"No deal!" Dracula snapped. "The highest I'm villing to go is $425!"
"$450?" Dick dickered.
"Vell…" Dracula let out a frustrated scowl. "Fine."
Dracula reached in his wallet, which had large bat wings embroidered on the front, and grabbed four one hundreds and a fifty.
"Inflation is getting out of control!" Dracula complained. "Pretty soon it's going to be a mortgage payment on my castle to just to buy a pint of spidervebs!"
"Pleasure doing business with you, Drac." Dick took off his hat for the moment to salute the Vampire King. Dick's dog removed the flying goggles from the top of his head, and did the same salute with a high-pitched giggle.
Quite frankly, Shaggy was a bit rattled by the whole situation. He was even more surprised when Dracula handed the Mustard Musket to him.
"Carry this, vill you?" Dracula asked.
"Like, you want me to carry this weapon?" Shaggy gasped. "Your prisoner?"
He would have attempted to point the musket right in Dracula's face, but he was so shocked that he was afraid he'd accidentally shoot something else if he did.
"Shah-gee, you are a part of my Monster Realm now! You don't have to be a prisoner if you accept that simple fact!" Dracula exclaimed. "Vonce you let go of your human life and accept that you are a verevolf, this transition vill go a lot smoother for you!"
Shaggy couldn't even believe he was having a conversation like this with the King of Vampires. He didn't want to be a werewolf, and he most certainly was extremely reluctant to give up his human life. He hadn't asked for this to happen to him; he was forced into it. Despite the intensity of his fear and his urge to just run away from his situation, he realized something: maybe this situation happening was life trying to tell him something. It sounded crazy, but his conversation with Googie in the plane earlier had made him realize that she was absolutely right. Shaggy was not just a scaredy cat; he was averse to any sort of danger or trouble. It was moments like this that he really appreciated how much his girlfriend's love made him into a better person. Her point earlier was incredibly insightful; life sometimes did involve difficult situations. Shaggy knew in his heart that he was afraid of any sort of difficulty in life…whether it be a monster or the normal responsibilities of being an adult. This is why he felt like the universe was trying to send him a message. He had always solved his problems by running away, but now life had presented him with a slice of trouble he couldn't run away from. Maybe this was his call to finally stand up and tackle a situation in a way that didn't involve avoidance for once. Maybe this was Shaggy's chance to finally fight danger with the strongest weapon of all…bravery.
Author's note:
I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! There are a couple of references within this chapter which you may or may not have gotten, so let's debrief those!
The man and his dog running the Wacky Weapons Warehouse are two other Hanna-Barbera characters, Dick Dastardly and Muttley. These are both characters from the shows Wacky Races and Dastardly and Muttley in their Flying Machines, but Scooby-Doo fans may also recognize them from Laff-a-Lympics (and Scoob!). Due to apparent copyright issues, the character's name was changed to "Mumbly" in Laff-a-Lympics, but it is the same character as in the original Flying Machines and Wacky Races shows. Dracula saying that he got the idea for the Monster Road Rally from Dick Dastardly is a reference to how the plot of Scooby-Doo and the Reluctant Werewolf is very similar to that of Wacky Races.
This is a far more obscure reference, but the spokesperson in the backwards baseball cap and baggy clothing that shows up for a brief second in the ad is a reference to rap producer DJ Mustard. He is known for his catchphrase "Mustard on that beat, ho!", which he says at the beginning of most of his productions. The company's slogan, "Mustard on that heat, ho," is a reference to this catchphrase. If you've read my other fanfic, Fangs for the Memories, you may recognize that this person also briefly appeared in the penultimate chapter (chapter 49) of that fanfic.