Shards Under a Mask

by The Scarf Girls

After the events in Lies Under a Mask, Suwa Nanaka's heart needed to heal. Thankfully for her, she is not alone doing it. This time, Suzuki Aina is by her side to gather all the Shards of her fallen Mask and Heart. How can this affect Aqours, the project and Nanaka herself? Moving on is always hard. The 3 Part of the Masquerade Series.

6. Chapter 6

Notes:

Hi! Misha here! ´･ᴗ･`

We are happy to announce that we were almost on schedule! (almost...).
And I'm happy to announce too that finally, Masquerade can continue! after 8 months on hold, finally, Shards can take a break (means me, I can finally take some rest, there is too much drama here!)

With this said I need to leave a WARNING.
This chapter IS DARK.
So I hope your heart is prepared for this, and we apologize if we hit some sensitive spot. Remember that this is Fiction and we love our characters, the real Seiyuus as we do love our readers.
We would happily reply all comments and insight about this chapter in particular.
We don't just write just because, everything we write has a propose.

Also, there's 18+ content.
We remind you that there's A TIMELINE.
These stories have an order! the Timeline is on our profile! ( •̀ᄇ• ́)ﻭ✧ So please make sure to check it out.
With no more delay, please, enjoy it. (ŐωŐ人)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

---

Shards Under a Mask.

Chapter 6.

Moonshine.

It was a cloudy and chilly night.

A strong wind was blowing intensely outside with some threatening clouds advertising the incoming rain. It was expected anyway, it was still Autumn.

The heavy wind hitting the windows could totally blend with the intense sounds inside the room.

Heavy panting, the headboard banging loudly against the wall.
The wet sounds mixing with the grunts. The moans.

Oh, yes, the Moans.

They were incredibly loud, incredibly sexy, and of course, very much out of control.

The sheets moved back and forth as friction became completely blissful, sending incredible sensations all over their bodies.

Her grip on the pillow became even painful due to her needing to use all her strength to endure the strong thrusts on her rear and feeling as if her arms would succumb in any second...

Her knees shivering trying to support her own body although they were already tired from before, because of an extenuating afternoon, she didn't care, it was worth everything, even the long ride...

"Ah...ah...I missed...you so...much..." she heard behind her, with a very elaborate voice.

In response, she just moaned loudly.

"Ah~ I think...I have...never...seen you...like ...this..." she heard again, "Geez, you are so hot..."

As she felt the grip on her hips intensifying she just couldn't take it anymore and while she moaned without any control, her arms finally gave up, making her to only support herself with her forearm as her torso touched the bed lifting her rear even more, to be filled with this act of love.

She just couldn't say anything, her mind totally fogged and consumed by lust, by being in that indecorous position, and being dominated by her partner in bed; not minding losing control, being exposed, or even in a very vulnerable position.

She just wanted to be spoiled, to be taken care of, she just didn't want to think of anything anymore... maybe she just wanted to be screwed and that was it...

"Ah... I'm gonna cum…Na—ah!... Nanaka..." she heard out of breath behind her; in her last glimpse of sanity she looked over her shoulder trying to lock gazes with her now really tired partner behind her, and as she licked her lips suggestively she dropped her torso and raised her butt even more, giving herself completely to the act...

The movements started to increase, as every sound in the room, the thrusting, the panting, the moaning, they even hid the vibrating sound that escaped from between her legs.

And after a few more thrusts and loud moans, they both arched their backs in a very loud and satisfying moan.

Pantings and heavy breathing filled the room; the wind now blowing outside was louder than their tired sounds.

Soft hands started to trace her back and rear as some cute kisses filled her sweaty skin.

Suwa Nanaka just couldn't feel her legs, her arms, or even her heart anymore; with her numb right hand she tried to move her own hair out of her face to lock her gaze on one of the nightstands beside the bed; a cute picture of Uchichi looked back at her.

She frowned.

"I..." she tried to say, she cleared her throat, truth was that she had been moaning maybe the whole evening and her throat was dry, "I need...you... to take it out..."

"Oh...right...sorry..." she heard from behind her and in a few moments she felt something long was being removed from her core softly; she couldn't help but grunt and raise her butt even more from the sensation, but at the first second of feeling her insides free, she just dropped her butt too, resting her legs on the bed.

Sweat covered her whole body, she felt sticky, tired, and still very vulnerable.

With little strength, she moved to the pillow and rested her head looking at the nightstand, her sight lost in the cute little picture.

"You Ok?" she heard, followed by a click.

"Hum..." Nanaka hummed, then felt a body lying on her other side, so Nanaka turned around to face her.

Suzuki Aina laid beach pose beside her with a goofy grin.

"I thought you liked cuddling after sex..." said Aina with her goofy voice.

"I can't feel my legs...or my body..." said Nanaka in a very monotonous tone.

"I get ya', I'm not gonna cuddle you, the last three times I did, we ended up doing it again..." said Aina with a fake outraged tone, "Not complaining, but we need a rest...seriously..." finished Aina very seriously.

Nanaka sighed and buried her face in the pillow.

Truth was that Aina had been doing her the whole evening. Intensely.

So, it was a good call to rest a bit.

"But I have to give you some credit…you were on fire…" said Aina in her goofy tone, "I'm gonna start believing that the only….reason…you…want…to…come…to my….place, is … because…of my toys…"

She heard Aina say that in a very choppy way, so she lifted her face out of the pillow to look at her, first with a frown because that wasn't true, and second, because she wondered why Aina was talking so weird…

But she couldn't help but open her eyes in shock at the sight of Aina, licking her cum from the toy, the toy that seconds ago used to be inside her, making her moan out of control.

"What—what are you doing?" asked Nanaka embarrassed.

Aina looked at her with the toy inside her mouth; she raised her eyebrows, curved the tip of her lips, took the toy out of her mouth, and gave it a long lick.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide in something that she couldn't describe if it was arousal or annoyment, but definitely not of her total taste. No pun intended since she didn't like her own taste, and well, Aina was enjoying licking the toy as if it was a lollipop.

"Sto—Stop doing that!" scolded Nanaka with her cheeks bright red; Aina just laughed like an old man and licked it one more time.

"Geez!" said Nanaka and turned around to not see that scene again and locked her sight on the Uchichi picture once again; her eyebrows raised in sadness.

"Sorry Sorry, but I can't help it…you are delicious…" said Aina, and Nanaka could hear that she was still enjoying her treat.

"Why is Uchichi still there …?" asked Nanaka looking at the picture with sadness.

"Hum? OH! right the Uchichi picture you brought last week…" said Aina sitting more comfortably on the bed, her back on one of the pillows, "Well, Nana gave it to me…so it's there for display…" said Aina proudly.

Nanaka couldn't help but make an even sadder face about it.

That Uchichi picture wasn't for Aina, but for Shuka.

But, she just couldn't go all the way to Saitama to drop that meaningless piece of paper of Uchichi that had been as prop in the seafood pasta dish she had ordered in the Café with Anchan.

Yes, Anchan told her that she needed to give that Uchichi picture to her, it would have been a nice touch, but, was it worth it?

Nanaka stood in the train station that Friday deliberating if it was the right thing to do, but of course, it was out of proposition. Shuka wasn't her girlfriend anymore, she was trying her best to move on and to get rid of her ghost, why on Earth would she cross all the way from Akihabara to Saitama (a 30-40 minutes ride) just to deliver a meaningless picture?

A picture that Shuka was going to get on Monday anyways when she went to the Café!

Her moment of being ikemen and romantic with Shuka, where she did that kind of stuff (break her normal plans to take that ride to Shuka's house) ended when Shuka made her end their relationship.

So, Nanaka put the image away in her pocket but somehow felt really weak.

It felt as if it was her heart that day.
The day she needed to take her heart out of her chest and put it away, in a pocket, because it was meaningless for Shuka.

She felt her legs shivering, dizzy, and cold sweat running down her spine, her eyes watery and totally vulnerable.

Nanaka knew that Aina was busy, that she had events on the weekend, and she might be busy at that moment preparing for them, but, she needed her.

And in the middle of this crisis, she lost her dignity and her selfishness possessed her, to call Aina. She told her she was free in Akihabara station and if she minded some company.

She knew that Aina would never say no to her.

And of course, she didn't.

Aina was so pleased to receive that call.

She was out working but told Nanaka to go ahead and start the long trip to her place; the journey would take at least an hour and a half...

But Nanaka just couldn't take it, it was too long.

She said "ok" to Aina but took the fast train, the expensive one, the one that only took 58 minutes.

Of course, she arrived before Aina, but Nanaka didn't lose any time; she already knew enough of the area around Aina's house to put herself to work, so she went straight to the Lawson's next to the station and bought some snacks and drinks, then walked to the confectionary store in the corner of the alley and bought some traditional sweets she knew Aina used to buy.

All of this was just to fill her mind with Aina.

Aina's town.

Aina's station.

Aina's combini.

Aina's snacks and drinks.

Aina's sweets.

Aina.

Yes, Aina stood like a stone when she saw Nanaka walking out of the store, her hands full of bags but with her nonchalant expression. Very good contrast with Aina's surprised one; of course, she just wasn't expecting to see Nanaka right in her corner and that early.

But Aina just waved that off and greeted Nanaka with a wide smile.

They walked to the house. Mostly in silence, Aina opened the fence, then the door, and at soon as she closed the main door, Nanaka dropped the bags, trapped little Aina against the door, and devoured her mouth...

Nanaka was feeling so vulnerable, that remind her of the day after the breakup when she was almost offering herself in a silver platter for Aina to take her, to love her, to lick her wounds -or other places...- but Aina was in her senses and rejected her, with reason, she had just been dumped.

But this time Aina didn't reject her. She didn't say anything and accepted Nanaka's feelings.

And she was very pleased, to say the least.

Because she could do with her whatever she wanted, this time both agreed on doing it. It was Aina's house, which meant all kinks were allowed, and there she had no power.

And maybe that was what she wanted; lose her power and let Aina do whatever, to make her too tired to even think about anything. Her attention only in Aina, and Aina alone.

She didn't even care if Aina's sisters or other siblings were in the house, she just assumed that Aina was available. She just assumed that she didn't even have any plans. That her presence was so absolute in Aina's life that she would drop everything and everyone because "Her Nana" called.

And this time, it worked.

Maybe because it was really weird for Aina to receive a call from Nanaka, so it could be possible for her to drop everything to just be with Nanaka, the truth was that she never knew.

Aina said yes, and then they spent the night together.

Of course, when the activity had a break and some sanity, Nanaka gave the Uchichi picture to Aina and she just displayed it on the nightstand very proudly. But Nanaka thought that on the next days Aina would put that picture away or something, but not for the piece of paper to be exactly in the same spot after a week.

Maybe Aina didn't even clean that spot.

Anyways…

That was last Friday.

And since that day they had only seen each other in Lantis building for practice and that was all. No quick dates, no kisses, no hugs, and of course, no sex.

Not because they didn't want it, but because both were really busy.

Since December was right around the corner it meant that the Mini Live was too, so they need to focus on rehearsals and mastering the Christmas songs faster and in record time, to move along and start practicing for the First Live.

Also, that week was the release date for the Christmas Single, "Jingle Bells ga Tomaranai" (lit. Can't Stop The Jingle Bells), and "Second Years" were busy with a release event in Akihabara, and since the rest of the members complained that they always chose "Second Years", they reminded the Chief that they were 9 and they should use them all.

And with that said, "Third Years" was chosen to go that Saturday to Shinjuku, to Tower Records, Gamers and Animate stores to promote the Single.

Of course, it was the whole afternoon signing, greeting, and smiling, which clearly, Nanaka was really grateful for, but at the end really tired.

She was tired of standing up more than walking from one place to another, her feet ached like crazy, and also, her body felt frozen up to the butt.

The previous Thursday had been the first snowfall of the year, and Nanaka was really weak to cold. So after work, while they headed to their respective stations, Nanaka asked Aina if she had plans for the evening.

Her parents were gone to Kawagoe, and while she could totally enjoy an evening on her own wrapped in a nice blanket, comfy with the hot water bottle and playing games, she just missed Aina's warmth. Her body, hugging her, her touches; truth was that she was feeling needy and kinda horny too.

Being alone on a cold night wasn't very nice or pleasant, or something she wanted.

Of course, Aina said yes, but to her surprise, Nanaka wanted to go to her place more than her own. Even if that could take them an hour and a half from where they were, versus the twenty-minute ride to Nanaka's place.

Not understanding too much Aina agreed; she had that incredible capability to just wave off all problems and complications about almost anything. She just felt happy that Nanaka wanted to spend her time with her and to keep going to her house. Even though it was far away.

And clearly, because Nanaka was feeling really weak about not being able to touch, kiss, or being loved by Aina, the first thing that she did stepping in her house, was to desperately eat Aina's mouth once again.

It was like if there was an internal switch inside Nanaka in Aina's house. Maybe it was because she was in another city, far from her house, out of her tidy and clean environment, or anything that could be related to her and her demure self, that when she was at Aina's she just took out her masks and was able to give Aina the control and succumb to her desires.

So, after a few rounds in the hall, the kitchen, and even the stairs, the action moved to the master bedroom where Aina hid her toys.

It wasn't that Nanaka was there because of "the toys", actually it was a surprise for her to learn that Aina had that kind of kink, but for sure they were useful. At that point Aina's tongue was numb, and as they had learned on previous encounters, Aina's fingers weren't long enough...also, the pains in her wrists.

"Can you put that away...?" asked Nanaka now somewhat annoyed looking at Aina licking off the toy but pointing the Uchichi picture.

"What thing? The picture or this delicious thing?" said Aina giving the toy another lick.

"Both…" said Nanaka annoyed and hid her face in the pillow.

"Ow, Nana, don't be a party pooper…" said Aina in her goofy tone, "besides, as I said, you gave me that picture… why would I put it away?…"

She felt Aina getting off the bed and walking towards the bathroom. She opened the faucet.

Nanaka looked up to the nightstand again to look at the Uchichi picture with sad eyes.

You should put it away….it wasn't for you…

Maybe I should give Shuka another Uchichi thing…when I have the chance…

The chance? And when would that be?

Uchichi was the Mito Sea Paradise Aquarium mascot back in Numazu, It wasn't like there was a lot of merchandise around of it. Besides, why would she want to give Shuka a present in the first place?

Nanaka deadpanned the picture once again.

Well, if Production gave the chance...maybe?

This is ridiculous...

"Maybe I should give you something more meaningful..." said Nanaka with a serious tone.

"Eh?" said Aina while she washed the toy, "Your company is more than enough..."

"You can't display that..." said Nanaka still looking the picture.

"I have little 'Kanan-chan' plushie..." retorted Aina in the bathroom.

"I didn't give you that; you stole it," said Nanaka in a deadpan tone.

Aina closed the faucet.

"Well, if this is troubling you, we can go out shopping..." said Aina still in the bathroom.

"Shopping...?" Nanaka snorted but didn't say another thing on that matter.

She fixed her sight on the window. It seemed that the snow had stopped and the clouds were passing by.

Nanaka made a sad face.

They barely had time for them and Aina wanted to go out shopping...

"I...I believe you invited me...to spend Christmas...with you...maybe we could... shop for something nice?" said Aina shyly.

Then she felt that Aina came back to bed.

Nanaka turned her face to lock her sight with hers; Aina moved the sheets to get inside and then gave Nanaka a goofy smile.

"What? It's freezing..." said Aina getting in.

Nanaka smiled at her and turned to her right side and opened her arms wide.

"Come...I want to cuddle you..." said Nanaka in a soft tone.

Aina stayed still a minute, her cheeks becoming bright red, she bit her lips and looked to the side shyly.

"Wha—What did we say about cuddling..." said Aina with a shy tone.

Nanaka raised her eyebrows in surprise.

Yes, she forgot that she wanted to try cuddling but as she was feeling needy she just couldn't cuddle more than 5 minutes and started desiring Aina to touch her, grope her, lick her and... do stuff to her.

Nanaka bit her lips.

She was feeling needy again.

"But I want to hug you..." said Nanaka with a sad tone and a pout.

And it seemed that her tone and face was enough. Aina curled the tip of her lips, tightened her thighs, and extended her arms.

"Then, let me hug you..." said Aina with a shiny smile.

Nanaka felt her heart stop a few seconds. And then nodded cutely.

She moved inside the bed and let her be held with the warmth of Aina's body. Of course, the 10 cm height difference was a bit uncomfortable, but Aina had learned how to cling to Nanaka's body.

So in no time, Nanaka became comfy on Aina's breast, while Aina locked her legs around Nanaka's hips.

Nanaka started to softly caress Aina's back while Aina played with Nanaka's silky hair.

"Are you ok Suwawa?" asked Aina with her mature tone.

"Yes, why?" asked Nanaka in her low tone, feeling now more sleepy thanks to Aina's strokes on her hair.

"Well... I don't know... you are... how do I say this..." Aina debating with her thoughts.

"Uhm?"

"I don't know, like so needy, so fondly...so—" but Aina was cut with a grunt.

Nanaka interrupted her by biting one of her nipples.

"He-hey... this is why I didn't want to cuddle..." complained Aina touching Nanaka's face for her to let go of her nipple.

"Are you saying that I'm submissive...?" asked Nanaka with a husky voice, she took out her tongue and then licked the nipple.

"Eh? No...well, yes...no, I mean...maybe? A little...?" Aina said troubled, "Hey, c'mon, stop it...I really want to enjoy you..." said Aina with a serious tone.

Nanaka stopped licking and moved her head up to lock her gaze on Aina's.

The pale light of the moon was sneaking through the curtains, giving the room a pale bluish hue. Aina's face was lit by moonshine for Nanaka to see clearly. She had a worried and sad expression.

"Haven't you enjoyed me the whole evening...?" asked Nanaka huskily and moving a bit up for Aina to see how she had been all over her body; Aina's marks of infinite appetite on her pale skin.

Aina bit her lips.

Yes, that had been her doing.

Since they entered the house, it was Aina doing Nanaka. Aina didn't have any problems coming without Nanaka touching a single hair of hers, Aina was so easily aroused that she just came at the mere sight of Nanaka enjoying, and maybe succumbing to her kinks, positions and so ever. But Nanaka never touched her back.

"I... I didn't mean it that way..." said Aina blushing, "Su—Suwawa..."

Nanaka smirked.

"Can we just cuddle?" asked Aina almost pouting.

Who could have ever thought that it would be Aina asking for a break in sex...

Nanaka went back to her position on Aina's breasts, as Aina continued caressing her hair.

"Sorry..." murmured Nanaka.

"It's just... Suwawa, usually it's the other way around..." Aina started saying, "and every time you are here, since your birthday, that ... I don't know... I feel that you are more honeyed, and fondly with me...it's because of the toys?" she asked with a goofy tone.

Nanaka looked up at her a bit annoyed.

The "toys" again.

"Because you know I can't be carrying them around... imagine if someone sees them at Lantis, or at your place—" but Aina was cut again.

"It isn't about the toys, Aina, I didn't know you had them, actually it surprised me to learn that you actually had... these kinds of things..." said Nanaka concerned and with her cheeks bright red.

Of course, the first time it was a huge surprise, and she was afraid of trying those things out, but Aina wanted to do it, and according to their rules, the house's host set them, and also, for the sake of their relationship's balance, she agreed to be kinky with Aina.

Aina laughed like an old man.

"Well, you are not the first to complain about my fingers being too short...I need to please the ladies somehow..." she said in an amused tone.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide.

She felt out of breath.

The... ladies...ies...

More than one?

Another one than me...?

She swallowed dryly and then tried to clear her voice.

"Wha—at?" she tried to ask, but her words were stuck in her throat.

"Eh? What is it?" asked Aina in her normal tone.

"Are...are you doing... o-other... girls?" she muttered afraid of the answer.

"Uhmmm, well, I've been quite busy lately... y' know work and such...flirting here and there, nothing important..." said Aina in her goofy tone.

Nanaka's heart started to beat fast, her eyes welling in tears.

"Oh..." Nanaka said softly, feeling the gears in her mind running at high speed, "Whe—n...when ...was the last time?" she dared to ask.

"Uhm? Beside you?... Mmm, I guess last weekend... you came on Friday right? Then I guess was on Sunday..." she finished with an amused tone and so freely as if she was talking about a common procedure.

Nanaka closed her eyes in pain.

Calm down...calm the hell down...

You can't start making a scene...

She couldn't.

They weren't a couple. They weren't girlfriends, and They had set some rules.

She couldn't officially date Aina because Aqours and Aina couldn't commit to Nanaka, because she still had to lie to the members about the NanaShuka thing.

So they had settled that Nanaka could give Aqours the show of the happy couple, but the kinks had to be with Aina.

But no one had set rules for Aina.

She could go, fuck and flirt with all the girls she wanted because Nanaka couldn't commit to her, and she wasn't going to wait sitting still.

And Nanaka couldn't be so cruel to tie Aina down for her to do nothing but wait until Nanaka decided to start dating and to finally commit to her officially.

It wasn't fair; while Nanaka "flirted" with Shuka and be cute with her in front of the members, Aina should wait with arms crossed?

Well, no. Aina wasn't one of those...

Made sense...

So, basically, they were sex buddies.

Even if Aina said that she "saw" Nanaka as more than that, Aina just couldn't go against her nature. She was extremely cute, and adorable, all the girls loved her because of that, and Nanaka just couldn't control her or leash her up.

Why? If they weren't a couple.

Nanaka didn't say a thing. She was swallowing the fact that Aina was flirting and maybe fucking around in that same freaking bed with someone else. And not just that. The famous 'toys' were being used with someone else too.

She felt angry, but somehow she understood that she couldn't make a jealousy scene because the answer would be the same as always; they weren't officially dating.

And as Aina settled on Nanaka's birthday, all the rules were for a "win-win" situation, more for Nanaka than Aina, because Nanaka wasn't giving her anything in return.

She didn't want to commit. Fine.

No strings attached. Fine.

She didn't want to label the thing they were having. Fine.

But the kinks were with Aina. Period.

And even if Aina was having some affairs outside this, Nanaka needed to bear it. Even Aina gave her her "blessing" to fuck around too.

The difference was that Nanaka just couldn't. It wasn't in her nature to be like a hummingbird from flower to flower, she even felt guilty to be dazzled by Shuka on the last event while they talked.

She was a one straight relationship person. No pun intended.

But it was clear that Aina worked in a different way.

And clearly, to start talking about how she had fucked another girl while they were cuddling after some intense sex session, naked in bed with her was very low, not to mention vulgar and out of place.

"Then? Suwawa what is it? You are not behaving normal..." Aina interrupted her thoughts,

Nanaka blinked a few times trying to swallow up her tears and thoughts.

"Eh? What?" said Nanaka spacing out.

"You said that it wasn't about the toys, then what? What's going on inside the 'Suwa World'?" asked Aina in her funny tone, of course, all the things she said about fucking another girl was way over her head, and it was almost like if it was the most common thing.

And indeed that was a tricky question because there was A LOT, going on inside the Suwa World.

"Well..." started Nanaka with her slow voice and tone; she took a minute to think. Her behavior towards Aina, being all mellow and clingy was because she was feeling lonely and weak.

That was the truth.

Lonely because Aina seemed too busy for her, and weak because due to Aina's absence she was feeling close to succumbing to temptation.

"Well? Suwawa...I'm here...outside, not inside your mind..." insisted Aina.

Nanaka tightened her embrace. She recalled that Shuka was never this pushy. When Nanaka felt weak Shuka used to hug her, stroke her hair, and give her love, no explanation required.

Yes yes, but this isn't Shuka...

Stop thinking about her, damn, please!

"I... I just wanted to be with you..." murmured Nanaka against her skin, her breath tickling Aina; she giggled about the sensation and tightened her embrace, squeezing her sticky thighs on Nanaka's hip.

"Aww you are adorable..." said Aina in her loud tone and gave Nanaka a soft kiss on her head, "But I don't believe you..."

"Eh?... no? Why?" asked Nanaka surprised, maybe Aina knew her more than she knew herself.

"Because I know... because... well, the last time you were acting like this, but keeping the proportions, was when Shukashuu was somehow missing out from your life when you asked for 'space', and you were somehow left alone..."

Nanaka tightened her lips.

But didn't say a thing.

"Also, when you were dumped by her..." said Aina softly and gave Nanaka another kiss on the head, like somehow licking the wound.

"You are a terrible liar Nana, so, tell me, what's wrong... you can still pretend that nothing happened, and we can still be fucking hard and raw until my tongue and fingers become numb once again, but this isn't gonna help ya'..."

Nanaka made a bitter expression against Aina's breast.

She was right. Aina was always right and she could read her like an open book.

"It's not a lie that I want to be with you... you have been busy... and...you will be gone..." said Nanaka with a sad tone.

"Eh? Gone?" asked Aina outraged.

"You will leave to Korea..." said Nanaka with a knot in her throat.

Yes, Aina, Rikako, and King had been chosen to go to Korea for the "COEX SMTOWN" in Seoul. It was supposed to be a one-day event, but of course, Production determined that they would require more time and wanted to shoot a special VTR and all that jazz. And because it was an overseas event they would be out of the country for at least 4 days.

"Oh, right, I forgot about that..." said Aina clueless, "When was that again?"

"The weekend of the tenth..." said Nanaka with a sad tone.

"Oh! Don't cha have your Niconama on Friday?" asked Aina in her goofy tone; Nanaka felt her heart stop.

Oh, right, my Niconama... the December Niconama with Shuka...
And Aina isn't going to be here...

Nanaka felt her eyes watering and once again very weak.

"Eh? What is this? Suwawa, are you missing me already?" asked Aina in a teasing tone.

"I… I miss you already—" but Nanaka cut herself and made a drowned sound.

Those words were the words that Shuka used to say to her. Almost like the personal slogan of the NanaShuka relationship. Similar to what Aina always repeated that their love was strong. But right now, Nanaka was just feeling it so weak.

Also, it sounded like she was just too dependent on Aina.

"Sorry," said Nanaka softly and moved her head up to look at Aina; she had a worried expression.

"Nana… do I need to be worried?" asked Aina softly in her mature tone.

"No… no, you shouldn't…" said Nanaka softly.

"So, you are feeling lonely…is that it?" asked Aina trying to understand.

"It seems so… I mean, we have been busy so we couldn't meet…" said Nanaka returning her face to the softness of Aina's breasts.

"Yes, I feel that too…I miss our short dates at the station and sharing bad tea," giggled Aina, "But are you sure it's just that? I mean, we are still seeing each other at practice… we will see each other for Christmas, right?"

Nanaka felt a pinch in her heart.

All of that was true, yes. But it felt like a consolation prize.

In the meantime, what? Aina would be fucking around with other girls because those girls could and Nanaka was busy with her life?

She frowned.

Nanaka moved and broke the cuddle to sit on her thighs and look at Aina; it was a quick movement that surprised Aina, she was left on her back, laying on her pillow with her eyes wide like two fried eggs.

"Is…that… a no?" asked Aina surprised and softly.

Nanaka had her "Suwa face" but was clearly annoyed.

"Aina…its November…" said Nanaka dryly.

"Yes, and Saturday… what's with that?" retorted Aina sitting more comfortably.

"It's November 26th…" answered Nanaka back; Aina just raised her eyebrows, still clueless.

"There's one month left for Christmas! So what the hell are we supposed to do until then?" said Nanaka annoyed.

"Eh? Oh..." said Aina very care freely.

"And you will leave to Korea in two weeks!" complained Nanaka a bit warmed up.

"Ah… I see…" said Aina curling the tip of her lips.

Nanaka raised her eyebrows in surprise, then she realized what she had just done.

Nanaka lost all power over Aina. Who was driving this relationship or whatever they wanted to call it, was Aina.

They could meet when Aina wanted and how she wanted.

She was feeling so weak and desperate to not fall into Shuka's charms once again, to convince her head and heart that she was building something with Aina, that she was holding onto Aina, depending on her, because if Aina left her, Nanaka might cross a line that she might regret later.

Nanaka blinked a few times trying to put her thoughts in order.

Who was using who?

"So, you want to spend more time with me then?" asked Aina with a smug face.

Nanaka shivered in her spot.

Somehow she had chills in her spine, cold sweat was running from her temples.

At another time, that question could have been perceived as the most common and obvious of things, they loved each other, so it was clear that they wanted to spend time together.

But now, seeing that Aina was conscious that this "relationship" couldn't work as one because of Aqours, she had just become busy with her jobs, other girls, and if there was some spare time, well, she could fill it with Nanaka.

So this "you want to spend more time with me" sounded like almost as if Nanaka needed to make an appointment in Aina's tight schedule.

Clearly this wasn't what she wanted.

She was busy with her jobs too, Aqours, practice, and the new jobs she wanted to decide on doing, but she was always willing to spend time with Aina, she even offered her to leave clothes at her house for Aina to spend more time with her, knowing that it took two hours to go back and forth; if she left clothes at her house it would help her with transportation time, but Aina didn't respond happily or well about it with the excuse that they weren't a couple so why bother.

Of course, now she got it.

Leaving clothes was somehow leashing her to her, and it was clear that Aina was enjoying her freedom.

And enjoying coming back to her house; her toys were there to please the ladies.

Nanaka closed her eyes in pain.

Despite what Aina was making her feel at that moment, she just couldn't ignore her heart.

"Yes Aina, of course, I want to spend time with you… we can't be ourselves at practice…and Christmas is a bit far from now…" she said slowly and thinking every word.

"Yes I know that," said Aina with her goofy smile.

"Then don't ask silly questions!" said Nanaka annoyed.

"Don't get mad Nana…I'm messing with you!" said Aina waving off the issue, "So it's just that? You need more time with me?"

Nanaka twitched her left eyebrow in annoyance.

What's with this?

Is this a joke for her?!

Really, it's like if she is doing me a favor…

"We need more time with each other…" corrected Nanaka, "If you said that we are more than just sex buddies, Aina, we need to spend time with each other out of bed!"

"Oh…but I did you on the stairs, the hall, and the kitchen, I didn't hear any complaints but your cute moans…you were so sexy today…" finished Aina with a very old man tone.

Nanaka's cheeks became wild red.

Yes, the internal switch at Aina's place combined with her new state of weakness.

But clearly, that wasn't the issue, it was the fact that Aina wasn't taking this seriously at all.

It broke a piece of Nanaka's mask.

"I'm not talking about that…I…I get that we can't commit to a full relationship, but I loved to spend my time with you, and as I believe you did too…" started Nanaka saying with sadness, "You…—" she stopped, she cleared her throat and looked at Aina with some tears welling her eyes.

"Suwawa—" tried Aina, but Nanaka just didn't let her, a tear escaped from her right eye.

"Please, I'm trying to be serious, we screwed each other, we had fun, and now I want to have a serious conversation about it, you asked for it..." sentenced Nanaka.

Aina bit her lips, she sat properly, facing Nanaka as she took a deep breath.

Then she nodded.

Nanaka took a deep breath as well, feeling the cold on her skin, her heart beating fast and becoming nervous.

She somehow forgot that they were both naked, in the middle of a cold and chili evening.

But things had to be done.

She fixed her sight on Aina.

"You know well, what I've been through…you know why I behave like this, I feel like I've been living here without a view; asking why we missed our chance, and now I'm looking for something to get by…" said Nanaka trying to endure herself into the situation and trying to put her thoughts in order, "And still, I feel that you don't care at all…"

"What?… How—Eh?!" snapped Aina outraged but still with a goofy tone.

"I know it's not fair to ask you for commitment when I can't do it myself; with all the highs and lows I feel, that you are doing the same as her…and worse…" finished Nanaka now looking to her thighs and shivering.

"Suwawa…what are you saying?… are you comparing me—" tried Aina.

"Of course!" Nanaka cut in, looking at her again, now with tears running down her cheeks, "Aina, you know how vulnerable I am when I feel lonely, you said it yourself, yet you don't care…"

"Suwawa, that's not true!" defended Aina now with a more firm tone.

"You are doing exactly what she did…" sobbed Nanaka now cleaning her eyes. She suddenly felt a cold body hugging her tightly.

"Please don't cry…" said Aina holding back her own tears; of course, Nanaka was facing the most crybaby member in Aqours, "And please put your thoughts in a right order out of your 'Suwa World', coz I'm not understanding…"

Nanaka just answered the hug and sobbed a few more times. Truth was that she didn't want to talk, she just wanted to feel comforted by hugs and love. Somehow, that used to work so well with Shuka, but here with Aina, it was different. She wanted Nanaka to clear her thoughts.

"I'm sorry Ainya…," said Nanaka sobbing, and feeling weaker than before.

"It's ok my Nana, but now I'm really worried… you've been acting weird for a while now …" said Aina sobbing too.

"Have I?..." asked Nanaka with a sad tone.

"Yes, you have…" said Aina and moved back to see Nanaka's face. Both were crying.

Nanaka looked at Aina with shame, her insecurities were sabotaging everything.

Aina was there naked, for her, trying to comfort her, to hold her and understand her. If something could define their relationship, romantic, their friendship, or as colleagues, was their communication; they could always talk to each other, but now it seemed difficult.

"Why are you crying? If I'm the mess…" asked Nanaka wiping one of her tears.

"Because you are always a mess…" said Aina with a sad tone, but then giggled.

Nanaka snorted.

Yes. Nanaka was always a mess in front of Aina's eyes.

And there she was, always picking up the pieces of Nanaka's mask and heart.

She fixed her eyes to Aina's, her beautiful body covered in the bluish hue coming from the window, from the pale moonlight that peeped into the cold room. The room that used to be hot and filled with their moans and pleasure, and maybe their love.

Nanaka grabbed Aina's left hand and without taking her eyes away from Aina's, softly made Aina touch her right cheek. She closed her eyes at the soft touch.

Aina was warm, her hands were soft and her simple touch was enough to ease her worries and her pain.
Her presence was enough to even erase the ghost.

What I'm looking for?

Someone? — evermore

Sunshine? — evermore

"Do you love me?" she dared to ask as she opened her eyes and saw Aina still with a sad look.

Aina moved her eyebrows in sadness and moved her right hand to cup Nanaka's left cheek.

"Of course Suwawa, I love you…" she said seriously, touching their foreheads.

"Then, why don't you want to spend time with me?" asked Nanaka softly and ashamed of her weakness, of her frailty, and sounding so dependant of Aina's will.

Aina softly caressed her cheeks and looked at her with a gaze full of love, like if she was holding a delicate flower.

"It's not that I don't want to spend my time with you; what am I doing right now then?…" said Aina making sense.

Nanaka shook her head, that wasn't what she meant, but Aina grabbed her cheeks with more strength and went closer, forcing Nanaka to look at her big eyes.

"I'm a Seiyuu too, I have work and other jobs, I run this huge house, I have my sisters to look after, and Suwawa… I'm not Shuka…"

Nanaka opened her eyes in surprise, Aina's tone was strong and determined.

"I…I know that—" tried Nanaka.

"No, you don't; you are trying to satisfy your world filling a hole with me." said Aina, still with a strong tone, but Nanaka could see the tears in her eyes.

"No, that's—" tried Nanaka once again.

"Then commit to me." said Aina holding on.

"I am!"

"No you are not!" snapped Aina leaving Nanaka's cheeks, and with a quick movement she stood up from the bed.

Nanaka's eyes widened in surprise as she followed Aina's tiny figure leaving the bed and doing some weird turns. She tried to walk to one side but stopped, then to the other, but stopped while giving her back to Nanaka.

Nanaka blinked a few times in deep sadness.

She wasn't the only one troubled with this relationship.

"Aina…" called Nanaka softly with her sight glued on the tiny girl.

Aina let out some grunts and sounds that were indescribable for her, she shook her head, scratched her arms, and kept making weird sounds, from time to time she sobbed too.

"Aina-chan…" called Nanaka softly.

"I'm sorry…" said Aina with her mature tone once she stopped grunting; it was clear that she was cursing.

Loving Nanaka was the hardest task ever in Aina's 21 years so far.

Maybe winning her All-Japan Anison Grand Prix price had been easier.

She took a deep breath.

"I just can't…" said Aina, then softly turned around to lock her gaze on Nanaka's body. "Suwawa, I know best what you have been through, but you can't pretend that I'm her, coz I'm not… we missed our chance, back then, but we can do it now…and we are not, because YOU, don't want…" said Aina pointing at Nanaka.

Nanaka swallowed dryly; once again Aina was throwing the blame to her.

"Of…of course I want…" said Nanaka trying to sound tough.

"Then brake up with her in front of Aqours on Monday morning." demanded Aina.

Nanaka tightened her lips and grabbed the sheet tightly, like holding onto something.

"You can't, can you?" asked Aina with sadness, because that would be the answer.

"You know what will happen if I do that…" said Nanaka softly, Aina snorted.

"Then, this is what is left for us…" said Aina shrugging.

Nanaka didn't say a thing.

"You want a relationship as the one you had with her; you in control, things on your terms and at your pace; I'M NOT HER!" finished Aina madly; it made Nanaka jump in surprise on her spot.

"So I can't please you as she did, I have my own career to take care off, so if you can't commit to me, fully as you did with her, then we are good as we are." finished Aina breathing very elaborately and sobbing. She was really holding back her tears.

Nanaka looked at her thighs in shame once again, also containing her tears.

"And—…and you are ok with it?…" asked Nanaka shyly and with a thin voice, then looked at Aina with fear.

Maybe that was a cruel question to ask. After all they were saying and feeling at that moment was almost like asking Aina if she was ok with the consolation prize.

Aina opened her eyes wide in sadness, and then she brought her hands to her face and started crying bitterly behind them.

Nanaka just couldn't take it and tried to move out of the bed to comfort Aina, but was stopped halfway.

"Stay…" said Aina holding back her tears once again and stopped Nanaka with her left hand while hidden behind her right. She sobbed.

Nanaka being the obedient girl she was, obeyed and sat on the edge of the bed in shame. She had made Aina cry, and she wasn't even allowing her to even hug her.

Try to feel…

….satisfied…

… in my world.

Nanaka's sight was lost on Aina's cute toes. Maybe after this discussion, Aina might decide that Nanaka was such a selfish brat and maybe kick her out of her place.

She made a bitter expression and thought about the time; she was two hours away from home, and that was at a regular time of the day. It was Saturday night and maybe there weren't any trains.

Nanaka looked up to see if Aina had calmed herself.

To her surprise, she was drying her tears and controlling her breathing.

Yes, loving Nanaka was such a hard task.

Shuka was actually very brave.

"Ainya…" called Nanaka with sadness; both locked gazes.

"I'm sorry Suwawa…" said Aina drying the last tear, "I feel so frustrated…"

"I get it…" said Nanaka softly and extended her right hand, "Please, let me hold you…"

Aina opened her eyes wide again and pouted; she wanted to cry again, but she was enduring herself to stop.

Nanaka gave her a soft look.

"Please?"

"I—I'm not her, you don't need to take care of me…" murmured Aina cleaning her tears.

Nanaka blinked understanding; every time Nanaka had a fight with Shuka, Shuka ended up crying and Nanaka comforting her. Aina was afraid to repeat the same pattern, that's why every time she was in distress she just pushed Nanaka away.

"Aina, I know you are not her, but I can't sit here and do nothing about it, hold my hand? Please?… " she asked again with kindness, "There's nothing wrong with me trying to hold you, and this is one clear reason why you don't want me to commit to you… because you don't let me take care of you…of your sadness and feelings…"

Aina sobbed a few times, cleaned a lonely tear from her cheek, and looked at Nanaka pouting.

"You are so unfair, Suwa Nanaka…" said Aina with a cute tone and extended her left hand; Nanaka held it softly, entwining their fingers

Nanaka smirked and pulled Aina towards her to hug her, of course, she needed to open her legs for Aina's body to get closer; they hugged tightly.

"I'm sorry…" said Nanaka softly, feeling Aina's cold body.

Aina's arms were around Nanaka's neck.

"I'm sorry too, Nana…" sobbed Aina.

"Hey, come here…" said Nanaka softly, as she tried to move Aina's body up, somehow Aina understood the motion and lifted her legs to rest them on the bed; Nanaka closed her legs and Aina sat on her lap, still holding onto Nanaka's neck. They stayed like that, hugging and feeling each other's bodies.

"I'm sorry you were feeling lonely…" murmured Aina, "I've missed you too…"

"Have you…?" asked Nanaka with her eyes closed, easing her pain with Aina's scent and warmth.

"Of course, Nana…I adore spending my time with you, I know I've been busy, but I do love our time…" said Aina softly.

"I wish we could spend more time together…" added Nanaka in a thin voice.

There was silence.

But it was an enjoyable silence. Feeling Aina's embrace, Aina's scent, her body stuck to hers, it was an incredible sensation.

Maybe this was what Aina referred to when she said that "Their love was stronger"; they loved each other, no matter if they were hurting themselves, fighting, or even didn't understand their pain, in the end, they always found a way to love each other...

"Suwawa…" called Aina softly.

"Yes Aina…?" asked Nanaka maybe too sleepy for Aina's taste.

"Hey… don't fell asleep…" mocked Aina giggling, "I—… Can I ask you something…?"

Nanaka opened her eyes softly; of course, the issue wasn't over, not because they decided to hold each other it meant that the topic was over.

"Sure Ainya…" said Nanaka in her singsong voice.

"Why—why is Aqours more important… than…our—your own happiness…?" asked Aina shyly.

Nanaka blinked a few times fixing her sight on an old wardrobe in front of her; the furniture was old, and on top there were all kinds of Anime figurines, clear proof that Aina was a big nerd and an Otaku herself, that behind all that professionalism hid a very childish girl.

It was clear for Nanaka that Aina would rather sacrifice Aqours stability for Nanaka's commitment than to keep hurting herself in that way.

"Aqours is the most important thing, Aina." said Nanaka with a soft voice.

"Yes, but why…?" asked Aina in her mature tone and tightening her embrace.

"Because the Unit comes first, we move as one, we are in this together…Aqours, the nine of us… we can't damage them, if one of us is hurt, the other eight will feel the pain too…" said Nanaka in a low tone, feeling every word in her cells.

None of that was new, but Aina grabbed Nanaka's shoulders and separate herself a bit from the embrace to look at Nanaka right at her face, she had a serious look.

Nanaka looked at her with a tired expression, but serious as well.

"Why?" asked Aina seriously, "I still don't get it…"

Nanaka raised her eyebrows and spoke with kindness.

"Maybe for you it isn't a big thing, but for almost all of us, Aqours is too precious, not only we feel like a family, but also we owe everything to this project, we are growing together, we can't compromise everything because of our selfish desires…" said Nanaka.

"Are you saying I'm selfish?" asked Aina with a frown.

"No, Aina, you aren't selfish at all…" said Nanaka with kindness, "but this project, for some of us, was their first real job, or maybe their last chance to be part of something important; you already had a career on your own, even Arisa had one too, but she is always putting the Unit first…"

Aina bit her lower lip and looked to the side in shame.

Despite everything that happened with Arisa at the beginning, she had always told Nanaka that Aqours came first, no matter what she did or didn't, if she was with Shuka, Aina or whoever, Aqours was Untouchable, not minding what Natural disaster could happen, or how Sentimental she might turn out to be, or whatever she wanted, she just couldn't change the formalities; Aqours needed to Shine.

The Answer was just too simple.

And Nanaka shared that same feeling.

"You want me to publicly break up with Shuka for us to finally commit…right?" asked Nanaka touching Aina's right cheek in order to look at her.

Aina's eyes were filled with tears once again.

"I'm just too selfish…" murmured Aina with a slight sign of a pout.

Nanaka shook her head.

"No, you are not…" said softly, "You are in love."

That sentence took Aina's breath away.

Aina opened her eyes wide, snapped a drowned sound and in seconds Aina was grabbing Nanaka's cheeks to kiss her passionately.

It surprised Nanaka at first, of course, they were having a serious conversation and the issue wasn't settled, but Aina determined that she just wanted to kiss her.

Maybe she felt understood?

Aina was madly in love with Nanaka, but Nanaka's love for Aqours was above that.

Nanaka hugged Aina tightly as she went deeper into the kiss; it tasted weird, it was salty.

Aina was crying.

Nanaka opened her eyes in surprise, and with her right hand touched Aina's puffy cheeks, which indeed were wet.

She broke the kiss.

"Aina…wait…" said Nanaka, softly grabbing Aina's cheeks.

"So—sorry…" said Aina resting her forehead on Nanaka's.

Nanaka looked for Aina's eyes to lock their gazes.

"You wanted to talk…" said Nanaka softly.

Aina pouted.

"But now I don't wanna…" she said still pouting in a baby tone.

Nanaka smiled cutely, sometimes Aina was such a baby...

"But we need too..." said Nanaka softly caressing Aina's cheek.

"I hate that part of you...so straight and determined... " said Aina pouting, almost like a scolded child.

"Do you? Sorry, that idea is wrapped in my mind now..." said Nanaka giving her a kind kiss on her forehead, "Let's solve this, shall we?"

Aina gave her a sad face.

Maybe she knew that there was nothing to solve; Nanaka's love for Aqours was greater than Aina's love for Nanaka, so they couldn't move an inch in this relationship.

But that wasn't the issue.

Aina hugged Nanaka once again and rested her head on Nanaka's chest.

"So, you were clinging to me, because you felt lonely…?" said Aina with a cute tone.

"You are finding this quite amusing aren't you?" asked Nanaka hugging her back and looking at Aina; she giggled.

"Yes, actually it is…" said Aina curling her lips, "Because I never thought you were this cute…Suwa-chan is so cute…" teased Aina.

"Mou…st—stop…" said Nanaka embarrassed.

Aina laughed in her old man way, Nanaka snorted.

"But I'm sorry Suwawa…" said Aina recovering her mature tone, "I'm…I guess... I'm used to my rhythm… I've been here alone, doing my things, my jobs, the house… my sisters….everything… I'm all over the place, I run on my own… and as I know that you can't run with me, I just run…"

"Uhm...I see.." said Nanaka softly.

"That's why you were letting me do you this hardcore all this time…?" asked Aina with a goofy smile.

"Eh?…hardcore...?" asked Nanaka surprised.

"Yes, you are letting me take the lead… I mean, not that I'm complaining, but… it's like here you became another person…"

"Don't you like it?" asked Nanaka shyly.

"Uhm… I'm not sure…" said Aina bringing her left hand to her chin in a thinking pose.

Nanaka blinked a few times a bit annoyed.

"It's like you don't like anything I do…" said Nanaka softly.

"Eh?..." muttered Aina breaking her thinking pose and opening her eyes wide.

"This is your place, Your rules… you want to do kinky stuff, and I don't complain…back at my place I wanted to treat you all mellow and sweet and you turned me down…" finished Nanaka softly and shyly.

"Oh, but Suwawa that was once…" tried Aina to defend herself.

"But, I didn't want to try it anymore… I don't want to be rejected again…" said Nanaka pouting.

Aina snapped and brought both hands towards her mouth in a cute pose, she opened her eyes wide.

"Eh? What?" asked Nanaka dryly; then she felt something warm in her belly.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise.

Did….did she just get aroused…?

"You are just bad for my heart…" said Aina giggling behind her hands.

"And bad for your panties too; if you'd be had any on right now you would be getting them drenched…" said Nanaka deadpanning.

"Oh, oh…sorry…" said Aina giggling "that's the Suwa effect…"

"Nonsense….I bet you are like this with 'all the ladies'…." said Nanaka with bitterness.

"You are my special lady…" said Aina breaking the embrace and standing up, "Sorry, my legs are sore and I don't want to get you dirty…"

"That's somehow a bit late don't you think?" said Nanaka now annoyed, not about getting dirty, but the fact that Aina kept talking about the ladies as if it was nothing.

After all the fucking they were doing, getting dirty wasn't an issue.

Aina just laughed like an old man.

"Well, you can be cute all ya' want at your place, it's your place after all…and besides…" said Aina stretching her legs in front of Nanaka, "I love all of you, you being cute, mellow….or… submissive…" finished Aina licking her lips.

Nanaka just blinked and squeezed her thighs.

"But, are you sure this was just because you were feeling lonely?…" asked Aina stretching her other leg; there was something about Aina being so comfortable with her body while naked…

"Eh? What do you mean?… I told you already…" said Nanaka blinking fast, trying to pay attention.

"Yes, but you see…when one of my sisters felt guilty because she ate my food or touched one of my figurines…" said Aina standing up slowly, "she acted very mellowly… and almost too obedient…out of guilt…" finished Aina with a grin.

Nanaka held her breath; was this guilt?

"Is Nana feeling guilty?" asked Aina walking very sexily and slowly towards her.

"Gui—guilty…?" she muttered.

"Did Nana do something nasty? Are you playing with kinks with someone else…?" asked Aina in her teasing and in an almost libidinous tone while touching Nanaka's cheek.

"With Shuka maybe?" finished Aina looking at Nanaka straight into her soul.

Aina knew her better than herself, that was for sure.

Of course, it was guilt.

But not because she had done something with Shuka, but because she felt capable of it.

And Nanaka wanted to commit to Aina, to prove that she was ready to commit to her, but clearly, if she needed to travel two hours away from home, to hide, to let Aina play with her in all her kinks, to let Aina screw her around the house, and to submit to her at the point of losing all control and to just stop thinking...

...then...

I'm not ready to commit to Aina...

Nanaka tightened her lips.

"I haven't done anything...with anyone but you..." said Nanaka softly, but feeling her heart racing.

"Oh...really?" asked Aina, maybe even disappointed, she withdrew her hand from Nanaka's cheek.

"Really, I want to commit to you..." retorted Nanaka holding to her mask.

"Yes...I know...well, I wouldn't have minded..." said Aina just too carefree.

"What? You won't?" asked Nanaka astonished.

"Nah! I would have asked you for the details," said Aina licking her lips.

"Eh?!" snapped Nanaka still astonished, like if this was some kind of joke.

"You know for future mental material to release my stress..." Aina continued.

"You— you are so weird..." said Nanaka in a soft voice.

"What? I mean you wouldn't like it if while you told me the details I started touching myself for you?" asked Aina as she grabbed her breasts.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide in disgust.

If Aina started telling Nanaka all the sexual adventures she had with the ladies she would probably slap her.

"No, of course, I wouldn't," said Nanaka now with a frown.

"Ah, c'mon, it's so hot, I mean, I already saw you receiving oral sex from Shukashuu, and damn! It still gets me, I still feel so aroused from that mental image...not just you, Shuka has a very nice ass..." said Aina now grabbing her cheeks in embarrassment.

Yes, she has...

That's beside the point.

How long had Aina actually stood by the stall while watching?!

Nanaka freaked out.

So, for Aina, this was completely normal.

"Can—can we just got back to the point…?" asked Nanaka troubled, she was feeling uncomfortable.

"Oh, right…" said Aina licking her lips, "Sorry, I got too carried away..."

"Ye—yeah..." said Nanaka squeezing her thighs again.

"So, for what I can take, you were feeling lonely, somehow guilty, I believe there's some Shukashuu involved, and you are here letting me screw you...are you a masochist?" asked Aina in her funny tone.

Nanaka frowned.

Why is she taking this so lightly?

"Why do you think Shuka is involved? I told you I haven't done anything with anyone..." said Nanaka with annoyance.

"Because I saw you at the last event Suwawa...you two, all sweet and good. Besides, when you were outside talking...you came back very weird..." said Aina with confidence.

"Aina, we are still friends," said Nanaka trying to not sound scared, even if that wasn't a lie.

"Yeah, right..." snorted Aina, "I get it; you know? When you say that if one of us is damaged the other eight can feel the pain, but you are talking about her, I'm part of Aqours as well, have you forgotten? I've been damaged since day one..."

Nanaka raised her eyebrows; she knew that too.

"But I'm a grownup, I endure the pain, and I keep working..." said Aina with a strong tone, "Why can't Shuka do the same? Why are you still protecting her?"

Nanaka bit her lips.

"It's because you still love her, and I get it, you ended your relationship because of Shuka's sanity, but you never stopped loving her; and you are here using me to erase her from your skin..."

"That's not true, I'm not using you..." said Nanaka quickly.

"No?" asked Aina seriously, but with sadness.

"I love you Aina, and I want us to be together..." said Nanaka with sadness, looking at Aina's toes; that wasn't a lie either.

Both fell silent.

Their feelings were clear, but the circumstances were not.

"You need to work in your loneliness issues..." said Aina with her mature tone; Nanaka looked up to her.

"What?" asked Nanaka.

"If you want to commit to me, "continued Aina with a serious and mature tone, "you need to control it, because I'm not like you, and I'm not Shuka; I'm not going to stop my life, my career, and my things because Nana-chan is feeling lonely."

Nanaka's heart shrunk.

Aina had called her the same way Shuka used to in their intimacy.

She blinked, it wasn't the moment, Aina was asking her for something in return.

"And I believe this is the best moment, with me far in Korea..." continued Aina; Nanaka felt cold.

"Eh? Are you serious?" asked Nanaka astonished.

No Aina

But Shuka...

Jesus... I'm not ready for this...

"Sure!" snapped Aina in her goofy tone again, breaking the tension, "With me far, you can't come here with your guilt, you can work on that at home, alone, it's gonna be a good exercise!"

Nanaka blinked.

"I...I think I don't get it..." said Nanaka shaking her head, "Aina you don't want to be with me?"

Aina opened her eyes wide in surprise.

"Why are you asking so many silly questions?..." asked Aina now massaging her temples.

"Sorry, it's like you are sending me home, alone, and grounded..." said Nanaka shyly.

Aina chuckled.

"Nana, when you asked me before if I was ok with the way we are, the answer is no, I mean..." she took a deep breath, "Of course, I would like to have you all for myself, but you still want to protect Aqours, and I get it, I'm part of it too...but I don't want to lose you... if these are the conditions we need to have for me to still be able to kiss you, to touch you, and have an evening like this, naked with you, then yes, I'm ok, I can work It out, I still love my time with you and I would love to keep hanging out..."

"But...?" said Nanaka.

"There are no buts..." said Aina blinking fast and with a goofy smile.

"Eh?"

"Suwawa my love for you is solid. Our love is strong, I'm convinced of that," she said with determination, "that's why I can still do my life..."

Nanaka didn't say a thing.

That meant that Nanaka's love for Aina wasn't that strong if she needed to "monopolize" Aina's time, because she was feeling lonely.

It was easier with Shuka, she was too dependent on Nanaka, so it worked for both sides.

Here Aina was independent, and she didn't need Nanaka at all.

"So, me sending you home while I'm in Korea is for you to work on yourself; I'm not doubting that you love me, I know you do... but you need to understand that love…" said Aina sitting next to Nanaka, "You can love me while doing your life too…"

"Uhm…"

"Think about it," said Aina with a wide smile, "your career finally launched because you got rid of a burden..."

"Eh?! Wait a minute..." said Nanaka now with a frown and looking at Aina, "Shuka wasn't a burden..."

"Wasn't she?" asked Aina with a smile, "Just think about what you had then, and what you have now..."

Nanaka gave her a sad face.

Not only she was saying that Shuka was a burden, but that she was a burden for Aina as well.

"Love is a burden"

Those were her words...

Nanaka fixed her sight on the wardrobe once again, and then closed her eyes.

Aina had found that out long ago and had been working on it since she figured that Nanaka's heart would never be in sync with hers.

"I told you that I would wait..." said Aina standing up, "but I can't wait forever, meanwhile, I'll have a splendid time in Korea..."

"Eh?... What do you mean?" asked Nanaka trying to wrap the idea of her being a burden to Aina, it was too soon for Aina to throw another bomb.

"The girls in Korea are gorgeous Suwawa! They all look like models! Their long legs, their faces so smooth...their skin...their silky hair; I'll be blind in front of all that beauty" finished Aina not even looking at her, but with such a happy tone and eagerness that Nanaka could have bet her Sanrio plushie collection that she was even getting wet.

Boom!

There was the bomb.

Nanaka blinked faster and maybe her face being a poem.

In no less than one minute Aina had told her that she was a burden for her, so, while she was left at home thinking about it, she would be across the Japan sea looking for Korean girls.

...What?...

Nanaka just couldn't react. Aina was still talking, but for Nanaka it was just noise.

Aina making noise; well, that wasn't new, but now it was an unpleasant noise. The mere idea of standing up and getting the hell out of that house ran in her mind.

If that was how Aina's love worked... it seemed incompatible with the shape of her heart.

Suddenly another sound that could bring Nanaka back to that universe; their phones.

If both phones were ringing it meant that it might be Aqours LINE chat or Third Years LINE chat.

To their surprise, it was both.

But, Nanaka being in her state of shock just sat still in her spot. Cold to the soul.

So Aina moved, grabbed her phone from the nightstand, and read.

"Oh, Aqours is here..." she said, "and Arisha in the 'Thirds', oh right its Saturday!"

Nanaka looked at her almost as if Aina had grown a second head. She was just digesting the mega combo breaker Aina had given her.

"Remember, today its Arisha's appearance in LisAni Tv…we should go and check it out…" said Aina with a happy tone, like if the issue had been settled and they could move on with their lives.

Aina moved to the entrance of the room and turned on the lights; Nanaka blinked fast at the change of lights as she covered her eyes.

"We should put some clothes on, it must be cold downstairs …" said Aina moving to the wardrobe.

"My—My clothes are…downstairs…" said Nanaka shyly.

"I know…somewhere between the hall and the kitchen…" laughed Aina, "But I can't let that pale cute butt become more purple from the cold…wear this…" said Aina giving her an oversize hoodie.

"Thank you…" said Nanaka softly.

"We need to be comfy…" said Aina taking another one for herself.

"My clothes are comfy…" said Nanaka in monotone looking the hoodie.

"How can that be comfy at all?…" said Aina annoyed putting the hoodie on, "It gives me so much trouble get rid of your doll clothes…"

"Eh?… But they are dresses…skirts…or one-piece dresses… isn't that easier?— eto, no pants?" asked Nanaka looking at Aina all disheveled.

Aina laughed like an old man.

"Why the hell would ya' want to wear pants? I'm gonna take them off eventually…" said Aina putting on her sleepers and going out of the room.

Nanaka stayed in place with the hoodie in her hands.

Her gaze clearly sad, she looked at the hoodie.

I…

I want to go home…

She hugged the cloths and softly cried on them.

She couldn't help but smell Aina's scent in it and feel so damn lonely and sad.

Aina had the control of everything.

Her feelings, Nanaka's, everything.

Aina was even aware that she was feeling lonely, was aware that she was weak, was aware that she might fall for Shuka once again. She even thought that she had done something with her, and even if she had, she didn't care….

…she wanted the details.

And Nanaka had felt destroyed by the mere thought of spending more time than necessary with Shuka; she was running to the other side of town out of guilt to submissively spend time with Aina, trying to convince her -and herself- that she was committed to her.

But Aina was no fool, she saw above that, and now…

Now she is sending me home, because I'm a burden, while she is gonna be out in Korea looking for girls…

She hugged the hoodie tightly and squeezed her eyes trying to suppress her cries and shouts.

Nanaka just couldn't make a scene. Aina couldn't see her that affected.

Her phone brought her out of her "Suwa World" once again, of course, the girls were still chatting about the program.

Or that was what she thought.

She sat straight once again, looked at the wet pool of her own tears on the hoodie; took a deep breath and put it on.

It was an oversized hoodie for Aina, but for Nanaka it just covered half of her thighs. If she extended her arms, her lower half would be totally exposed.

Maybe it was another kink?

Well, her house, her rules.

Nanaka moved at her slow pace towards the other nightstand, the one with the Uchichi picture, she took her phone and her scrunchie which she wrapped around her right wrist.

She put her sleepers on, and turning off the lights, she walked out of the room.

Nanaka was now somewhat used to Aina's place, so she moved more comfortably than the first time she was there. She noticed one of her socks resting at the top of the stairs. She bit her lips.

Yes, Aina had eaten her on the stairs.

With a tired movement, she grabbed the sock and put it inside the hoodie's pocket. Then she started walking down the stair to find her other sock halfway down. She picked it up.

She could see that Aina was in the living room setting the TV.

Nanaka blinked, she wasn't feeling comfy enough to face Aina yet, so she started a quest to recover her clothes around the house.

She walked towards the kitchen, where she found her blouse on the floor and her bra on a counter.

Yes, Aina had fucked her by and over the counter.

She picked up her clothes but not sure what to do with them, she continued walking to the hall where her dignity was spread all over the floor.

Her dress was there, her soaked panties too, and her coat, of course, that was the first thing that had blown off her.

"Suwawa"

She heard behind her.

"What the hell are ya' doing there? You'll freeze…"

Nanaka turned around to see Aina peeping from the kitchen.

"Recovering my clothes…" said Nanaka like if that was the obvious thing to do.

"I can see your butt…" said Aina with a goofy grin.

"Well, my panties are here…" Nanaka said while trying to turn around and walk to grab them, but Aina stopped hugging her from behind.

She stopped.

"Leave them there…they are wet anyway…" said Aina huskily.

"What if someone—?" tried Nanaka, but she felt Aina's hand between her legs, she made a drowned gasp.

"No one will come…" said Aina hiding behind her back while her fingers teased Nanaka's core, some wet sounds started to echo in the main hall of the house, "Hmm what is this…?"

Nanaka tightened her lips, her teeth as well.

Truth was that she wasn't feeling in the mood for that anymore.

But of course, while walking through the house recovering her lost clothes she had indeed recalled all her sexual encounters with Aina on the last hours; it had some effects.

"Sto—stop it…" said Nanaka in a weak voice.

"Eh…why? You are so wet now…" said Aina while continuing to finger her, in the middle of the hall.

"No, Aina, I—" but she couldn't continue, Aina introduced her cold right hand under the hoodie, straightly to Nanaka's right breast.

Her hand was so cold that it made Nanaka jump in her spot making her drop her blouse and bra to the floor, with the rest of her dignity.

She felt weak on her knees as she lost balance, so she bent over, and that was the wrong sign for Aina.

"Oh, you really are into this…" said Aina amused as she stuck to her back like a koala, moving her fingers quicker inside Nanaka's core.

"No—" tried Nanaka, but Aina's weight was more than what she could take at that moment.

So she stepped to the side to find something to hold on to; she found a wall.

"Good call…" she heard behind her.

And as he felt sandwiched, and the cold wall on her right cheek, cold hands traveled through her body, one was already inside her while the other played with her aroused nipple.

It was dark, it was cold, and there was no pleasure at all.

Nanaka fixed her sight on the main door and the window beside it. It was snowing again so the pale light that witnessed this scene was indeed weak. The worst desires hid in the dark, not even moonlight could appease the moment, to at least make it pass as an act of love.

There was no such thing. Aina just took what she wanted.

Her house. Her rules.

The last thing Nanaka saw before she closed her eyes, was the main door.

The exit to this madness and she couldn't make it.

.

It wasn't long for Nanaka's body to fall onto the floor, her knees in a sitting position, her legs shivering.

Her breathing was quite elaborate, Aina's as well.

"Geez, ya' are so hot…"

She heard behind her, then she felt Aina licking her fingers.

"Ya' know how much I like late snacks…Thanks for the treat!"

Nanaka didn't say a thing, her sight was lost somewhere between the main door and her shoes in the receiver, something was shattering inside her.

"Oh, Suwawa we are gonna miss the show…"

"Uhm…" she managed to mutter.

"I'll take your clothes inside…" she heard again, with some movements.

Then, silence.

Nanaka blinked a few times, feeling the cold, not only on her butt, but now in her heart.

She could go home, but right now she was in a hoodie and nothing else, she just couldn't go outside with that and her shoes.

She closed her eyes slowly, feeling all the pain.

She needed to go back. She had to spend the night with Aina.

And needed to be strong.

What I'm looking for…

She stood up with difficulty, helping herself with the wall; she was surprised to notice that the wall was no longer cold, it was warm, of course, her body had been squeezed against it, while Aina took her from behind.

She made a bitter face, she thought that this kind of acts had stopped after what happened in her own kitchen, that Aina had learned the lesson, but of course, here there were other rules.

And for the last hours, Aina had been playing the kinks, and Nanaka was being submissive, so for Aina maybe this had just been playing out another kink.

Nanaka arranged her clothes, grabbed her stuff that fell while being taken, like her socks and her phone. Put her sleepers on once again, and with a tired walk, she came back to the living room.

The TV was on.

Aina had managed to put some drinks and snacks on the coffee table while she was sitting comfortably with her phone, it seemed that the girls were on fire in the chat.

"Oh, finally…" said Aina ungluing her sight from the phone, she gave her a wide smile.

Nanaka froze on the spot.

There was no guilt or shame in Aina's heart.

She was playing the kink. That encounter in the hall was just another Kink.

"You ok Suwawa?" she asked with a sad tone, "Come…you must be cold…"

She said patting her side of the couch.

"I put your panties in the washing machine… tomorrow they should be ready…"

Nanaka walked and shyly sat where Aina had patted, and as if on cue she put a long and warm blanket over them.

"Thank you…" said Nanaka softly, like in a trance.

"Hey…Suwawa…" called Aina softly, moving to face her, "What's wrong?…oh! oh, my, you didn't like it?… did I hurt you?…"

Aina's face had a real concern.

Nanaka looked at her with sadness; of course, she was hurt, and of course, she hadn't liked it.

But at that moment she wasn't feeling strong to start an argument with Aina. What for? Another tantrum? She already knew that she was a burden for Aina, why would she need to add more weight to the issue?

"Can-can I hug you…?" asked Nanaka.

"Oh…the cuddles…" said Aina while curling her lips, "Of course, my Nana! sorry, I just…forgot about that after sex..."

Nanaka kept her "Suwa Face", and didn't say a thing, that act couldn't be called as sex, it was Aina doing whatever the hell she wanted, but she was feeling sad and hurt and needed to be hugged, or to hug something to ease herself.

And seeing that she just couldn't leave that house, she needed to conform with Aina.

Aina moved in front of Nanaka as her position was always between Nanaka's legs.

This position was the most comfortable when they shared a common screen, whether it was them watching the TV or playing video games.

Sometimes, from time to time, they sat like that in bed too; while Aina was playing her Nintendo DS or reading her scripts, Nanaka just hugged her and rested her head in the crook of Aina's neck giving the short girl so much love and warmth.

And as always, Aina sat, Nanaka hugged her tightly and lovingly under that blanket.

"Aww, this is bliss…" said Aina getting comfy.

Nanaka didn't say a word.

She fixed her sight on the TV, the program hadn't started yet but it was about time.

"You are so warm..." said Aina moving, then she turned to her left to see Nanaka's face.

"Are you ok...?" asked Aina.

Nanaka took her time to blink a few times and then she fixed her eyes on Aina.

Of course, her "Suwa face" was expressionless.

"Suwawa..." she called again now sitting straighter and touching Nanaka's cheeks.

They spent a few seconds like that, looking at each other, and while in Aina's face there was a concern, in Nanaka's there was nothing.

"I'm ok Aina..." she lied.

"Ok…" said Aina not believing her that much, but as this was Aina, she touched Nanaka's chin and went closer to steal a kiss from Nanaka's lips.

It was soft and quick, then she returned to her comfy position using Nanaka as a human cushion.

Nanaka blinked a few times, not feeling anything at all, and hugged Aina tightly; she could feel how Aina touched her arms reciprocating the feeling.

While they sat there the program started.

Almost 3 months ago, Production had determined that they had to shoot some small VTRs for LisAni Tv in two sessions. The program was easy, the whole idea was to summarize the first season of the Anime, and give their thoughts about the 13 episodes. Episode 1 and 2 were shot with the whole cast giving their favorite scene and some insights about the episodes.

But episode 3 was just "Seconds Years" (of course, they would be first…) and at the end of the episode, there was a 15 seconds segment where the Seiyuus had to do an appeal to the audience to vote their character to win the LisAni poll to become LisAni girl 2017.

Yes, another poll.

So, in the first session of the shoot episodes, 1 to 5 were reviewed. Anchan took her appeal time on episode 3, Rikako on episode 4, and Shuka was last in episode 5.

This recording was somehow special for Nanaka because Shuka had broken up with her 2 days earlier, and Shuka started to mess with the lineup on that same day.

But the second session was special too; not only because it was shot after the NAOMI's room presentation, meaning a new change in the "We are Aqours" choreography in their introduction, but because of new footage with all the members that had been recorded and Shuka's behavior was different, she started with glances again and smiling at Nanaka and doing her thing.

In the second session, episodes 6, 7, and 8 were about "First Years" and their respective appeal times, episodes 9, 10, and 11 would be with "Third Years", and the last 2 episodes, the 12 and 13th had the whole cast again.

Episode 9 was supposed to air that night, with "Third Years", and it was Arisa's time to do her appeal.

And because Aqours supported each other, it was now like a routine to gather on Saturday night, on the LINE chat to comment the broadcast and cheer for the one who was doing the appeal.

"Aww! You took the middle for this shot, I forgot…. I thought it was Arisha…" commented Aina, "Geez I'm nervous…"

"Why…it's not your turn for your appeal…" retorted back Nanaka.

"Because we are on TV!….oh! That picture sure is old…we should take another one with the new outfits…" commented Aina while watching.

The program began by showing the very first picture they took as Aqours, it was clear that it was old because the uniforms had the red handkerchief. Then the program continued with a brief summary of what it was about.

Then, introductions.

"Awww Suwawa, you are first…" squeaked Aina between her arms, fangirling and moving around.

"Aina this is not new— stay still…" Nanaka tried to say while holding the "fish out of water Aina".

She laughed like an old man.

"Ah! I can't take it!… You are adorable…You did memorize the script…" said Aina trying to stay put.

"Well, it's part of the job… they need to know 'Kanan'…" retorted Nanaka.

Then it was Arisa's introduction.

"Ahhh Arisha is so gorgeous…" said Aina.

Nanaka blinked.

"She is so gathered… I bet she wasn't even nervous…" squeaked Aina.

"She looks scary…" said Nanaka trying to downplay Aina's comments.

"Nah! She is confident… and so into 'Did-san''s role, she could be a dominatrix with such a strict face." said Aina with her goofy tone.

Nanaka blinked a few times and deadpanned.

Whaaat…?

Is Aina fangirling over Arisa…

Arisa….?!

Then it was Aina's turn.

"AHH! geez! No, I'm so embarrassed!" squeaked Aina, once again moving like a fish, Nanaka held her tightly.

"Aina-chan, if you don't hold still I'll sit alone…" said Nanaka now a bit annoyed.

"Aww no-no, but I can't take it!" said Aina using her hands to cover her face.

"Why? You sure look adorable… Oh, your hair was black back then…" said Nanaka in her calm tone

"Oh… ya' right…" said Aina stopping her fishy movements.

"Why did you dye your hair?" asked Nanaka softly.

"Oh, well…I can't be blonde…but this is the closest I can be with brown hair…" said Aina in her goofy tone, "You dyed yours as well…"

"Uhm…"

But their conversation came to an end when the Nanaka on the TV started hosting the episode.

In that episode, they would review episode 9 of the Anime, "Mijuku Dreamer". THAT episode which took Nanaka and Aina's friendship to record.

"Oh." snapped Aina staying stiff in her spot.

Maybe Nanaka felt the same at that moment.

That episode was special, not only for "Third years" in the anime but for their Seiyuus as well.

Their feelings while discussing how to portray that scene, how their lives were clashing, how their feelings were reciprocated but they couldn't be together.

But now they were. Sort of.

Nanaka intensified her hug as the VTR went by; scenes of the episode, how Dia explained why Kanan couldn't sing, how she was protecting Mari's future, and how Mari was running under the rain to confront Kanan.

Aina touched Nanaka's arms giving her a cue to loosen up her grip a bit, as she did Aina turned around softly to look at her.
They were lost in each other's eyes.

That scene had been just too painful to record, and seeing it again let them recall how they used to love each other, and how painful it was for them to put their feelings into it.

"Don't take my feelings for you lightly…" said Aina softly, repeating Mari's lines.

"Are you going to slap me…?" asked Nanaka with sadness.

Aina smiled at her, as both gave into a lovely kiss.

The next few seconds of the program didn't matter at all.

And they broke the kiss when the song "Mijuku Dreamer" started.

Aina hugged her lovingly as she rested her head on Nanaka's chest.

Nanaka answered the hug and kissed Aina's head.

Their love was strong.

That was sure.

They finished watching the program in that lovely hugging position.

On the program, they commented on how after that, Aqours became a 9 member group and how the lyrics were so well written about their feelings.

Later Arisa's appeal time started, the longest 15 seconds ever.

Not only because Nanaka recalled how she suffered recording her own appeal time promoting Kanan back then, but how in those 15 seconds Aina started fangirling about Arisa once again.

She even broke their lovely position to sit straight and started to move like a fish once again commenting on how charming Arisa was, or how she looked incredibly stunning and a lot of sort of things that clearly pissed Nanaka off.

Nanaka just missed the whole section about writing a "Haiku" because Aina was still talking about Arisa, and her good qualities, including her butt.

Again.

This was how Aina fucked up the good mood they could settled into; talking about other girls without a care and not minding that Nanaka was there listening, and she needed to act as if this was so damn normal.

The program was finally over and Aina started writing in her phone, of course, everybody was giving Arisa compliments about her appeal, that she looked cute and cool, all of that.

Nanaka just looked at the messages in her own phone but was too pissed off to write anything.

Aina and her ladies.

Aina and Koreans.

Aina and Arisa.

Was that Jealousy?

Yes, it sure was, but one thing was feeling indiscriminately jealous about everything, and another was just rubbing into Nanaka's face that Aina would rather be with anybody else but her.

Talking about other girls in her presence almost as if she was part of the house furniture.

So, while Aina ate, drank, and chatted with the rest of Aqours on her phone, something was shattering inside Nanaka.

Something was building from her insides, something indescribable, maybe something that she had never felt before with this intensity.

Rage.

It was unfair, Aina could talk in bed about how she did other ladies, how she wanted to go to Korea to see the cute girls, how she was drooling over her own team members and needed to stay there, as Aina's cushion?

Did she need to stay in that house and play the kinks? To please her?! While she was drooling about other girls!

Or what was worse, to tolerate that Aina did whatever the hell she wanted with her body?!

Who was trying to feel satisfied?!

Nanaka's sight was clouded by sadness and rage.

The best call would have been to call it a day and go home. But she couldn't.

It was late, no trains and no panties.

And since it was snowing and so damn cold it would be unwise of her to go out half-naked, so she needed to stay in Aina's house.

But changing the rules.

Empowered by her own determination, Nanaka closed her phone and dropped it somewhere on the couch.

Both can play the same game…

And with that, she went straight to Aina's core under the blanket.

Aina snapped in surprise, and because Nanaka's hand was cold in contrast to Aina crotch.

"Hey—hey Suwawa…" said Aina jumping a bit from that abrupt act, almost dropping her phone.

"Shut up," she commanded in her husky tone from behind her, it was her turn to take whatever she wanted.

"Oh…" said Aina surprise.

But who was most surprised was Nanaka when she found out that Aina was indeed soaked down there.

"What the hell is this?" asked Nanaka in her angry tone while moving her fingers in the pool of Aina's juices.

Aina started to grunt and make cute sounds of being aroused.

"Ah, Suwawa… ya' want to do it again…?" asked Aina but not stopping anything, on the contrary, she opened her legs more.

Nanaka frowned.

Of course, Aina was enjoying this.
For Aina, this was the normal sex she used to have before Nanaka came to her sex life and "demanded" from her good loving and romantic sex.

She liked to be taken.

To be fucked.

"Again? I'm afraid you haven't been touched for the whole evening…" said Nanaka in her low tone as she bit Aina's ear; she moaned.

Maybe Aina had come more times than Nanaka herself in the evening, but not because Nanaka had touched her, but because Aina was always horny and ready for action.

"Now it's my turn, fuck your rules," said Nanaka taking her control back.

At the same time, as she set the rule change, she inserted two fingers inside Aina, while with her left hand grabbed Aina's left breast under the oversized hoodie, somehow in revenge for what she had done in the main hall of the house.

But Aina was enjoying it.

She dropped her phone and used her hands to find support on Nanaka's knees as she started to move her hips fiercely against Nanaka's fingers.

"Yes, Yes! Suwawa…Fuck me!" she screamed loud, it made Nanaka tighten her teeth.

This wasn't a punishment for Aina. But at least Nanaka was in control.

She licked her lips.

I'll make sure to enjoy this then.

With that in mind, she tightened her grip on Aina's breast, and with two fingers started to squeeze her nipple. Good thing that Nanaka not only had long arms but also long and thin fingers.

Aina started her dirty talk louder than ever.

It was becoming hot under the blanket as well, and maybe Aina was feeling that way too, because between her frantic movements and moans, with her left hand grabbed the blanket and pulled it off them, exposing herself to the cold.

She moaned louder.

Nanaka licked her lips.

She withdrew her fingers from Aina's soaking wet core, at the same time stopped teasing her breast and nipple; of course, Aina stopped moaning and talking dirty not understanding what was happening, but then she felt her hips being taken and in a quick move Aina was off Nanaka's lap and facing the couch with her hands and face.

"Woo—woo— Suwaw—AH!" she moaned against the couch.

Nanaka knelt on the couch, she had once again inserted her fingers inside Aina, while with her left hand grabbed Aina's hips to start thrusting faster against her butt.

"Wow…you are soaking wet…" said Nanaka in a low and ironic tone, "Is this because Arisa?"

Aina moaned louder and raised her but even more.

Nanaka bit her lips.

Maybe in Aina's head, it was Arisa who was fucking her, not even her.

She tightened her teeth again.

"Or is it because of the cute Koreans?" she dared to ask still using her ironic tone.

"EH?!—AH AH…Suwa—wah! What…ufmmm Fuck!" moaned Aina against the couch.

Nanaka rounded her left arm around Aina's belly and pull her up to stick her to her torso.

Both girls were standing up, putting their knees on the couch for support.

Nanaka's fingers were still fucking Aina intensely, while Nanaka's left hand grabbed the hem of Aina's oversize hoodie and pulled it up, exposing her left breast to the cold; Nanaka started to squeeze her incredibly aroused nipple.

"I don't need toys to please you…as your ladies…" said Nanaka huskily into Aina's right ear.

Aina moaned in her incredible high tone while arching her back.

No one saw that coming.

But knowing Aina this wasn't enough, so Nanaka didn't withdraw her fingers from her.

She continued thrusting hard against her core.

"Ah…Suwawa…I...I—AH Ah…" she continued moaning.

Of course, Aina could still continue this with no problem at all.

Nanaka narrowed her eyes.

If she needed to start sharing Aina with the ladies, the Koreans, or any other Aqours members, she would make it clear to them that even if Aina didn't want to recognize it, she had an owner.

She belongs to me!

And Nanaka smacked a bite in Aina's neck. Then she started to suck hard on it.

"AH! Suwa…wa…Ah…What are ya' doing…?!" asked Aina between moans and grunts, but felt totally powerless.

For the first time, Aina seemed weak against Nanaka's will power to dominate her.

But Nanaka wasn't done. She started to lick Aina's neck until reaching her ear, bit her lobe, and traced the shell of her ear with her hot tongue.

Aina dropped her arms defenseless.

She was standing on her knees, moving her hips like in a trance, her head completely over Nanaka's shoulder as she continued leaving marks all over her neck, ear, and shoulder.

Her left hand squeezing her breast and nipple as if it was a huge and tasty mochi.

Aina was all over the place with her moans, grunts, and dirty talk. Her hips moving fast as she reached a second orgasm.

With a loud moan Aina bent forward, Nanaka grabbed Aina's tired body rounding her left arm around her belly.

Aina's legs were shivering as Nanaka's right hand was getting drenched in Aina's juices.

"You are going to stain your couch…" murmured Nanaka with her lower tone against Aina's back.

"Ah…Ah… Suwawa…" cried Aina breathlessly.

"What?" asked Nanaka huskily.

"You…are…amazing…" said Aina tiredly.

Nanaka had a sad look.

She was angry, mad, furious.

But in Aina's lenses, this was a kink.

Far from that, it seemed that this was how she liked to fuck.

Nanaka blinked feeling sad.

But I don't fuck…this is not my style at all…

Nanaka closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

She took her fingers out from Aina; of course, Aina grunted at the sensation.

"You ok?" asked Nanaka.

"Yes…ufff," blew Aina recovering her breath, "Geez, that was intense…"

Aina put her right leg down, at the same time Nanaka hugged her tightly from behind.

"Oh…Suwawa…?"

"I'm not done…" said Nanaka trying to still sound husky.

"Eh...?" snapped Aina as she tried to look back, but Nanaka stopped her with a kiss on the neck. A soft one.

"I want to take you to the bed…" purred Nanaka into Aina's ear.

Aina's body shivered.

"Oh… I'm…I'm really going….to stain the couch…." murmured Aina embarrassed while covering her face with her hands, her legs were shivering.

"Eh? Are you going to cum again?" asked Nanaka astonished.

"Ma— maybe…." said Aina in her shy mode.

Nanaka twitched her tongue.

"Then it can't be helped… I'll make you come harder then," said Nanaka with her low tone getting off the couch and letting Aina go from the embrace.

"Eh…? What are—Suwa—oh…" said Aina cutting her own words.

Nanaka stood up from the couch and took off her hoodie dropping it on the floor, then took the scrunchie from her right wrist and put it in her mouth while her hair into a bun.

"Su—… Nana?" asked Aina with a cute tone; Nanaka looked back at her with a deadly glare.

Aina gasped in shock.

Maybe Aina was surprised that Nanaka's body was covered in hickeys and sweat, something that she just couldn't see under the moonshine in the room, but now in the light of the living room, it was clear how messed up she was.

And it was all her doing.

Aina had been fucking her raw and hard, taking everything she wanted and how she wanted, and Nanaka hadn't complained, she had obeyed everything, and now it was her turn.

Nanaka finished her bun and turned around to face Aina.

Aina opened her eyes wide as her legs still shivered.

Nanaka smirked.

"Sit down, and spread your legs…"

Aina swallowed dryly as she obeyed.

She slowly got down from the couch and sat, then leaned to the back of the couch and with all her shyness spread her legs for Nanaka to see everything.

Nanaka was even surprised that Aina was this docile, but she didn't change her deadly glare.

Maybe that was the key to control Aina?

She walked towards Aina and stood in front of her. For the first time, she wasn't shy about her own body being exposed to Aina's sight in the clear of light, maybe she wanted it that way, for Aina to see her doing all over her body.

The body that looked ready for commitment but Aina just wanted to still fool around with other girls.

Nanaka slowly bent down and grabbed Aina's hoodie.

"You don't need this…" said Nanaka in her monotone; Aina didn't say a thing and lifted her arms for Nanaka to remove the clothes.

Aina returned to her position on the couch as Nanaka dropped the hoodie somewhere else, then fixed her sight on Aina's watery eyes.

Their sights were glued into each other.

Nanaka licked her lips.

Aina smirked in response as she brought her left hand to her lower lips, and spread them for her.

"C'mon… don't waste anything…" said Aina with a challenging tone.

Nanaka raised her eyebrows in surprise.

So, where was the control? Who was controlling who?

Nanaka smirked back.

All of this was another kink.

For Aina, everything was a game, a wicked game.

Her feelings, their situation, everything. A joke.

She narrowed her eyes in disgust and anger.

How could she commit to someone like this?

Why should she even try…

Nanaka touched Aina's thighs, so smooth; Aina shivered to the touch.

"Uh…" snapped Aina in a cute tone.

Nanaka blinked.

Maybe Aina could come without even touching her, she was getting aroused just with Nanaka's sight.

Aina was so easily aroused that Nanaka started doubting about her own skills in bed; what made the difference between her and the rest of the girls Aina fucked?

Why should she even bother loving someone like this…?

She was getting dizzy, totally drunk by the situation; she kneeled as her grip on Aina's thigh became stronger.

Nanaka looked at Aina's face for one last time; she was biting her fingers shyly, with her watery eyes glued to Nanaka's. It was clear, Aina was in her shy mode, and that only meant that she was playing out the kink.

Nanaka closed her eyes tiredly, took a deep breath, and as she was feeling filled with Aina's scent she just sent everything to hell.

Her house, Her rules.

Once again, she was at Aina's mercy, doing what she wanted, how she wanted, and where she wanted.

Nanaka wanted to take her to bed...

I am looking for...

..try to feel…

…satisfy…

Nanaka opened her eyes, and accepting how she had lost in Aina's game, she lifted Aina's legs with strength and smacked a bite from Aina's smooth inner thigh, of course, Aina moaned loudly.

Then she moved to the other thigh and did the same.

"AH! Suwawa, don't— don't leave marks—"

"Shut up," said Nanaka recovering her low tone as she locked her sight on Aina's eyes.

Aina made a drowned sound, Nanaka's eyes were filled with tears.

"Su—Suwa—AH!" she moaned, her head fell back and grabbed the cushions tightly.

Nanaka started devouring her fiercely with no mercy at all, as tears rolled from her eyes and down her cheeks.

It couldn't be said that there was no love in the act, because there was, Nanaka did love Aina. A Lot.

She was crying because of that. Because her love was for someone that just couldn't love her the same way and it was painful.

Hearing Aina complement another girl who wasn't her, it was painful, listening about her affairs with other girls while she was in bed with her was painful, seeing her flirt with other girls was too.

But she couldn't help it.

And maybe Aina wasn't even aware of that. It was in her nature.

What was worse was that Nanaka just couldn't change that, she needed to love her like that.

It tore her apart.

So, using her anger and pain as fuel, she started eating Aina out.

No mercy with her clit as her tongue twitched on the bump of nerves; her hands touching and scratching Aina's smooth skin, Aina twitching below her as the fish out of the water she was when she was fangirling over Arisa.

Nanaka frowned in anger again. Jealousy maybe.

She bit Aina's clit with such intensity that Aina's back arched while she moaned.

As she didn't receive any complaints about it, she continued.

Nanaka left the bump of nerves to find Aina's entrance and fucked her with her tongue. Her right hand moved towards Aina's clit and started to tease everything she could find down there; Aina's entrance, her clit, whatever it took for Aina to lose herself in Nanaka, and no-one else.

"Ahh! Suw-aAH! ssss—tooop it— I'm gonna….AHH, so GOOD!" Aina was shouting without any control.

Maybe the old man from the Soba shop could even hear her in his house.

Nanaka blinked.

Good, I hope she tells him that her friend who didn't like rice fucked her brains out…

Yes, that's it…

Nanaka went even deeper with her tongue, moving, twitching, and sucking everything out of Aina, even her moans.

If she is gonna fuck someone else, I'll make sure she tells them that I exist too…

She withdrew her tongue out of Aina to breathe, but inserted 3 fingers fiercely inside her and changed tactics with her clit once again as she started sucking it with strength.

"Wooo Suwa…no...that…is …too….AHHHH! I'm gonna…..cum…cum….Suwawa!" shouted Aina moving her legs quickly and her hands towards Nanaka's head.

"HEY! sto—stoo— please! ya' are….Sooooo deeeeeep!" shouted Aina between moans, her grip on Nanaka's hair was so strong that she even destroyed Nanaka's bun. Her hair falling gracefully over her shoulders.

Nanaka's sight became darker; she was too close to make Aina lose her senses, same as hours earlier Aina had done with her.

Nanaka curved her fingers. Her long and thin fingers.

Those fingers that Aina didn't have, so she couldn't know how it was to reach the deepest treasure inside Nanaka, well, Nanaka knew, and she literally had Aina at the tip of her fingers.

At the same time Nanaka sucked very hard on Aina's clit, she pushed her fingers deep down in the right spot.

It made Aina crazy.

She started shouting indescribable things out of her mouth at full lungs' capacity.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide, this indeed was something new for her; she could feet her fingers being trapped inside Aina so tightly, and then something hot on her lips.

Nanaka frowned in disgust as she left Aina's clit and looked at Aina twitching on the couch.

"AHHH MY GOD!" screamed Aina as her back arched once again, her hands grabbing the couch with so much strength that Nanaka thanked that there were no hands on her head.

But her right hand was still attached to Aina's lower lips with something wet, sticky, and hot.

Nanaka looked down and opened her eyes wide in astonishment.

"Oh…" was the only thing she could mutter.

Then she looked at Aina, she was still shivering from that intense orgasm.

Aina was covering her face and breathing very elaborately, maybe too ashamed to even look at Nanaka.

Nanaka made a bitter face, maybe she had gone too far?

"Are…are you ok…?" asked Nanaka shyly.

Aina just made a few spasms.

"So—sorry…." said Nanaka softly, but Aina was still twitching.

"A—Aina-chan…I … I'm going to take them out… ok?" said Nanaka softly, but Aina was still too busy twitching and shivering to answer.

With some difficulties she took them out, Aina moaned again as she shivered some more.

"Ah…uhm… I think… the couch got stained…anyways…" said Nanaka not quite sure what to do.

"You…got…to…be…kidding…." murmured Aina very elaborately from behind her hands.

"No... I'm not… should— should I bring some paper towe—?"

"Shut up!" screamed Aina behind her hands but with some humor.

Nanaka smiled softly, then she looked at her right hand; maybe she had gone too far.

"You ok Aina-chan?" asked Nanaka in a cute tone sitting beside her.

Aina moved her hands just enough from her face to look at Nanaka; her face was red, she was so embarrassed that maybe she would have rather ask the Earth to swallow her than face Nanaka.

"I'm sorry…" she said shyly behind her hands.

"Sorry for what…?" asked Nanaka with her sleepy face; maybe seeing Aina being a complete mess because of her made her anger fade away.

"Mou! You stupid!" snapped Aina covering her face once again.

Nanaka giggled.

"Was this your first time?" asked Nanaka softly and using her left hand to touch Aina's right arm.

Aina withdrew her hands a bit again to lock faces with Nanaka, she was even frowning.

"You—you can't be asking such thing…" said Aina with shame.

"Why not? I want to know…" said Nanaka with curiosity.

Aina covered her face again.

"Yes, this never happened before…" said Aina embarrassedly from behind her hands.

Nanaka smiled proudly.

But somehow she wasn't satisfied.

Nanaka bent down once again and started filling Aina's skin with kisses.

"Eh? What are you doing…?" asked Aina removing her hands from her face, "Haven't you had enough?!"

Nanaka stopped kissing Aina's clavicles and looked at her with a cocky smile.

With her left hand, she moved some strains of hair behind her ear and gave Aina a strong kiss on her clavicle, sucking hard into her skin; Aina moaned again. That would definitely leave a mark.

"If I had enough? No," said Nanaka kissing Aina's skin again, "What am I doing…" she paused, locking her gaze in Aina's eyes, "…I'm loving you"

Aina made a drowned sound and shyly nodded. She let Nanaka continue her task of loving her.

Nanaka continued tracing her with kisses and licks, leaving hickeys everywhere, maybe Aina understood that Nanaka's love had a selfish part of monopolizing her, if she couldn't have her all for herself, then she would make sure to let the rest of people know that there was somebody else enjoying that body too.

Nanaka ended up straddling her and fiercely kissing Aina's body.

Suddenly Aina touched her face giving her a sign to stop. Nanaka was leaving another hickey beside Aina's navel when she stopped.

Both locked gazes.

Nanaka opened her sad eyes wide when she saw Aina's filled in tears.

"Am I hurting you…?" asked Nanaka softly.

Aina shook her head and moved her hands letting Nanaka know that she wanted to get closer to her face; Nanaka moved.

"You don't need to mark me…" said Aina softly, "I'm already yours…"

And they kissed.

It was a sweet and salty kiss at the same time.

"Can…can— you, make love to me?" asked Aina in her cute tone, but with a cracked voice, she was definitely crying.

Nanaka gave her a sweet smile, a few tears also fell from her eyes.

She nodded.

"I'm sorry Nana…" was the last thing Aina said before Nanaka kissed her.

And that was the last kink they played.

Maybe that was the difference between Nanaka and the rest of the people into whose panties Aina might get into; Nanaka was the only one who made love to her.

And Aina understood that she had hurt Nanaka with all her comments, but followed the kink anyway to the point that both had broken trying to feel satisfied with the other.

Both worked in different ways, their love and heart shapes were different, and somehow they needed to force themselves to fit into each other.

Not knowing really if that was healthy.

But what was clear to Nanaka, was that she just couldn't fit in her current state, and she needed to change, otherwise, who was going to be hurt the most was going to be her.

Sleeping or flirting with other people wasn't Aina's concern, but Nanaka's.

Aina was clear about her feelings and her way of being; she could be marked by Nanaka, she could be owned by her, but Aina would always be Aina, a natural flirt, and Nanaka just couldn't stop her from being herself.

She needed to learn how to work on that, otherwise, this relationship would never work.

But this didn't mean that Nanaka was totally fine with the way she behaved. Of course, it pissed her off every time she recalled that Aina couldn't be controlled and that she was totally careless.

So, maybe that was why Aina had sent her home with the heavy task of working in her loneliness issues while she was overseas having a good time...

But she had forgotten that she would leave Nanaka alone...a whole weekend with no other than Shuka.

Somehow, their love didn't seem that strong anymore.

.

.

—-**0. December 2016. 0**—

Finally, December came.

It couldn't be said that November had ended in a good way, for all Nanaka cared it ended in a very tiresome way.

And it was somewhat disappointing because she had started the month in high spirits, winning the center, Aina's love, being on the cover of a magazine, on national TV, and the radio.

But, it ended with a lot of back and forwards with Shuka and Aina.

After that weekend at Aina's house, they saw each other at Lantis building for practice, and a few quick dates at the station after practice.

Aina was quite busy with her jobs and getting ready for her trip to Korea, and clearly Nanaka just couldn't be bugging her about asking for time.

It was clear to her that she needed to work on her loneliness issues. Even if it was a bother.

On the other hand, Shuka seemed more lovely and reachable.

Remembering that Nanaka used to suck hard in the dancing department, now practicing every day for the Mini Live was somehow paying off, and Shuka was the first one there cheering for her.

Especially in "Humming Friend" or "Mattete Ai no Uta", where they shared close space in the choreography.

Somehow the cold shoulder that Aina was giving Nanaka was clearly being contrasted by Shuka's bright smile at practice. Of course, on Aqours' members' lenses, it was the mellow couple being cute; for Arisa, it was Nanaka playing her part, and for Aina…

… she never mentioned anything.

Not sure if Aina was mad or just didn't care, maybe she was just busy.

Of course, the following Saturday, December 3rd, like the previous Saturday night, the LisAni Tv program aired, and that weekend was Aina's turn for her appeal time on the show, and the wannabe couple tried to make some efforts to hook up that evening, not succeeding that much.

Aina said she was busy with work and Nanaka didn't want to sound pushy so she stayed home, curled in her blanket, her hot water bottle, hot green tea, her nerdy glasses on, a nice and tasty home-cooked meal by her lovely mother, and the comfy confines of her one-man sofa.

A perfect evening if she dared to say.

Of course, she was present in all the online discussions in the Aqours LINE chat, which of course, was all about Aina.

She was cute. She was just too cute.

She was dangerous for everyone's heart.

Nanaka, of course, frowned after watching her appeal, because all the cute compliments and how she dared to blow a kiss to the camera.

Her own team members were all head over hills about cute Aina's performance. And Nanaka just couldn't help but feel annoyed about it, and sure she just couldn't jump in the middle of the chat shutting all the members up.

This wasn't for the fans, and Shuka was in that chat too. Curious thing, Shuka was with everybody else between teasing Aina and complimenting her. Nanaka just thought it was because of social pressure; if everybody was doing that, she needed to do it too.

Nanaka just tried to be a silent watcher of this and not get involved, but of course, King was such a pain.

She dragged Nanaka into the chat asking/forcing Nanaka to also say something.

Sometimes Nanaka wondered if King was just stupid or if she just had air for brains…

… feeling that it was kind of the same, Nanaka just sent a cute emoticon and tried to say her goodnights. She tried.

The members reminded her that next Saturday was the last appeal, which meant hers.

The same weekend that she would be left alone, but with Shuka, on Friday.

Nanaka smiled bitterly about it.

Massaging her temples she tried to think about something else. But it was difficult.

Working in her "loneliness" issues was something new for her.

Nanaka was a loner for sure, she was an only child, but the kind who also received everything they wanted. She was spoiled by her parents, she had good and caring friends, but she also knew how to be alone.

She kind of hated people.

Crowds were the worst. There was no better place than her home, her one-man sofa, good green tea, the TV on and some manga to read.

She was a nerd and she was always doing stuff for her own enjoyment.

Reading, playing games, studying something new, spacing out on the internet, sleeping. All activities she enjoyed alone.

So, it was a big surprise when someone like Aina told someone as lonely like Nanaka, that she had "loneliness" issues.

Someone who created a parallel universe to hide every time she felt the world was unbearable (Which was kind of always).

But maybe that wasn't the kind of loneliness that Aina was referring too.

She knew quite too well that Nanaka liked to be alone, and she had no problem at all staying a whole weekend hiding in her safe place. She was even boring in the eyes of the rest of the members.

So, what was the real issue here?

Being too dependent on Aina? Was she?

Well, the last 2 weeks had been kind of because of her guilty thoughts and all the back and forwards with Shuka when she was trying to move on for the sake of being with Aina, and to prove her that she was ready for commitment.

But clearly Aina wasn't seeing it that way.

Wasn't it normal if someone loved somebody they wanted to see that somebody? Kiss them? Hug them? Spend time with them?

For Nanaka that was normal.

It made sense when someone and somebody who were a wannabe couple and wanted to try things out, to spend more time together to see if things could work out.

With Shuka it had worked that way.

But, once again, Shuka and Aina were completely different beings.

Somehow Nanaka had forged Shuka's behavior in romance; Aina was already forged in her twisted kind of way.

Maybe she needed to ask herself why the hell she wanted to be with Aina in the first place?

Why did she want to still try to have a relationship with ANOTHER member?

Hadn't she learned anything after a year of dating Shuka?

Why would she want to live through that again? Because she was horny? Because she "needed" to be with someone? Because she always thought that Aina was different? That with Aina she could have an adult and mature relationship?

Well, they sucked at that.

Her thoughts were heavily interrupted by her phone.

Nanaka tiredly blinked a few times watching the piece of metal move and shine with messages. Of course, the chat was still going, but what took Nanaka's attention was that Arisa had sent her some messages in her private chat.

She took a deep breath and grabbed the phone.

Hey! Suwawa, How you doing? ´･ᴗ･`

Sorry to interrupt you, just wondering, is Aina with you? ( 〃．．)

Nanaka narrowed her eyes.

Why would Arisa be asking her that? Why not try calling Aina?

Then Nanaka noticed that this whole time, Aina hadn't said a word in the chat, and neither had she, besides that cute emoticon for King to shut up.

She picked up the phone and answered Arisa's message.

Hey! (ㆁᴗㆁ)

No, she is not with me today, I'm alone ・;）

Why? ()

Arisa's answer was a "surprised emoticon" and then followed by a call.

Arisa Komiya was calling her.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide like two fried eggs.

That was definitely new.

With shaking hands she answered;

"Hello…"

"Good evening Suwawa, sorry I'm calling this late…" said Arisa over the phone.

"Evening; don't worry, I'm just watching TV…" said Nanaka in her boring tone, of course, she didn't tell her that she was also debating her "homework task" given by Aina over why the hell she had loneliness issues.

"I thought Aina-san would be with you today…" continued Arisa.

Nanaka giggled.

"Why is that? She—" Nanaka paused, "She has a life…"

Nanaka bit her lips.

"Yes, but you two spent the last weekends together…" said Arisa.

"Well, my parents are home… I guess…" said Nanaka not sure if she needed to lie, tell the truth, or what.

"Oh, I see… good job on the shoot, by the way, we looked good." continued Arisa with a happy tone.

"Oh-oh, right, good job to you too, you do such a good job as MC." complemented Nanaka.

"Ah! Thank you, you did great last week! Maybe you should give being the MC a try one day…" continued Arisa, Nanaka blinked with a frown, what the hell was Arisa calling for? To compliment her?

"Eh? Me? Why? You do a great job at it…" said Nanaka with her boring tone.

Arisa giggled.

Arisa used to take the center position while MCing "Third Years" and AZALEA's Niconamas, and she did a great job, why would Nanaka try to change that?

"Geez, thank you…" said Arisa on the other side.

Then a strong and heavy silence.

Nanaka blinked a few times.

"Eto… yeah…good…" tried Arisa on the other side, of course, talking with Nanaka on a Saturday night wasn't the best panorama.

Maybe a conversation in person would be more fruitful.

"Uhm…" Nanaka managed to say in her boring tone.

"So… are you good?" asked Arisa.

Nanaka blinked.

She took a deep breath and dared to ask;

"What do you want Arisa?"

Arisa giggled.

"Sorry, yes, this might be weird for you…" she said between giggles, "I…I just wanted to talk to you…"

finished Arisa with some tones of embarrassment.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide.

How bored was Arisa to think that calling Nanaka was the best option for spending her Saturday night.

"Eh?!" snapped Nanaka.

"Hahaha sorry, is that too weird?" asked Arisa.

"Well…yes… it is… don't you have something better to do?" said Nanaka dryly and straightforward, she wasn't "nice" with Arisa, and she knew it, it was part of their peculiar relationship.

Arisa giggled again.

"No, actually I don't… and I got bored of the Aqours LINE, to much teasing for Aina…" said Arisa so chill.

"Oh, really?" asked Nanaka getting comfier.

"Weren't you reading?"

"Actually, no… I know how cute Aina is, charming and all that… I don't need for the members to remark on that…" said Nanaka dryly.

"Are you jealous?" asked Arisa between giggles.

"Uhm…maybe," said Nanaka not sure if she wanted to have this conversation with Arisa.

"Well, I get it…" said Arisa in her serious tone, "I thought both of you were together because neither had said a thing…and I didn't want to fuck it up, you know?… Shuka is also in the chat, so if you need to—"

"Thank you." interrupted Nanaka.

Then there was silence.

"Is something wrong Suwawa?" asked Arisa with concern.

"No, why?" asked Nanaka in her "Suwa tone".

"Where's Aina-san?" she asked.

"I don't know…" answered Nanaka.

Then another silence.

Maybe Arisa understood that something was wrong, but she didn't want to push the issue anymore.

"I see— Suwawa, do you have any plans for next weekend?" she asked.

"Eh?… Next weekend…?" asked Nanaka confused.

"Yes, I mean the weekend of the tenth…" continued Arisa.

Nanaka blinked.

Arisa must have been so terribly bored to be insisting in; 1, continue talking with her; and 2, trying to spend a weekend with her.

"Well, besides the Niconama on Friday… I…I guess I'm free…" said Nanaka, "Why? What do you have in mind?"

"Well, since Aina-san will be gone with Kanako and Rikako to Korea next weekend, I thought we could hang out? Watch the LisAni show? It's your appeal time next Saturday…"

Nanaka felt her heart shrugging and her eyes welling in tears.

After all, all her unpleasant behavior towards Arisa, she was always there.

Not sure why, but she had always been watching over her. Aware of her feelings.

"Su—sure…that sounds lovely…" said Nanaka softly, holding back her emotions.

"Yes?…Oh! Sweet!" snapped Arisa happily.

Nanaka smiled on her side of the call.

"Good, then shall we get into the details by the week? We will see each other for practice…" said Arisa continuing talking.

"Yes, that sounds good…" said Nanaka softly, but with a clear smile on her face.

Then Arisa continued talking about practice, the songs, the choreographies and so ever.

Maybe Arisa was who easily became lonely. She could go on for hours on the phone, just….talking.

Maybe for Nanaka (or even for Arisa herself), that wasn't the best way to spend her Saturday night, but it was indeed enjoyable.

And it helped Nanaka chill out and think on other things rather in where the hell Aina was, or what the hell she was doing.

Not that she didn't mind, but for the sake of working in her "loneliness issues", she needed to stop her mind from wandering into dark places.

Of course, the week passed in the blink of an eye, and the weekend came.

Not before Friday and that terrifying Niconama.

It is not that it was terrible, but recalling some factors, well, it made it scary.

The first factor was that Aina wasn't around anymore, so Nanaka felt weaker than ever. And the second, it was the December Niconama with Shuka and Aiai (two-thirds of CYaRon!'s members) meaning that the Niconama was noisy, messy, and she needed to make a fool of herself.

But the terrible thing wasn't that she needed to look like a fool and mess around with some funny props because of the punishment game; it was because of what had happened earlier while studying the script.

Aiai was just too suspicious about Nanaka being too close to Aina and Shuka being so stiff, as if she needed a good fuck to release all the tension while Nanaka seemed so fresh; she even asked if Nanaka was dating both girls at the same time, but Nanaka just couldn't answer anything due to the circumstances they were in.

But seeing how Aiai was so picky and pushy with the issue, NanaShuka tried their best to cover the lie, which was extremely painful, not to mention dangerous. Because it was like opening the wound, and inside it, lots of butterflies with their feelings were moving around each girl's bellies.

Nanaka's mind was sent to hell when she found a cute Uchichi plushie in the bag of props, and Nanaka in an act of kindness gave it to Shuka, who lost her senses and forgot that there were people from the Staff, Aiai, or even the Chief, and hugged Nanaka.

It was like a bucket of hot water.

Exactly 3 months had passed since they broke up and couldn't touch each other anymore. That was the first hug in 3 freaking months, and it moved everything inside Nanaka.

Maybe she had that straight idea of giving something Uchichi related to Shuka since the picture thing, but she did, and that made Shuka so damn happy, it reminded her when she used to make Shuka happy. That wide smile that she adored…

Well, it was like a powerful weapon against everything Nanaka was trying to build (or rebuild) on her mask. Shuka had just destroyed her with that hug. And after that, she told her she needed to talk to her.

Her world trembled.

With no Aina around, not even Arisa around to help her, Nanaka felt defenseless against this situation.

And, not happy enough with the Friday task of the Niconama, the Chief came with the great surprise that the December trio, "KaYoBy" as Aiai had named them, should go on Sunday to the Karaoke chain "Joysound" to promote the franchise.

That only meant one more thing.

Spend another day with Shuka.

And with no Aina around.

Nanaka freaked out of course, and Aina didn't help either with disappearing from Nanaka's digital life. Aina was useless with technology, she didn't dare to write to her or send pictures or whatever; she was indeed enjoying her time in Korea.

And Nanaka was stubborn enough to swallow up her pride and not sound like a jealousy girlfriend, or pushy, or whatever. If Aina wanted to communicate, then good. Maybe that was part of working in her loneliness issues.

Nanaka didn't have any news about her up to that Friday. King and Rikako where a different matter, they sent pictures and stuff to their respective "Year chat".

So, when Arisa tried to set the hour for them to hook up on Saturday, Nanaka asked for the afternoon more than the evening in order to rely on someone "quicker", and despite everything, that person was the one and only, Arisa Komiya.

Then Saturday came.

Saturday, December 10th. It was cold, chilly, and sadder than ever.

Winter was coming, definitely.

Arisa being the diligent being she was, invited Nanaka to spend the chilly afternoon in Asakusa.

That day Nanaka was in A&G+ headquarters and the ride was about 40 minutes from where she was, and knowing that Arisa was far in Shinjuku signing her calendars for some "Christmas event" in Shinjuku BLAZE, she determined that moving to Asakusa was the best move because both rides were around 40 minutes, and it gave them the similar amount of time to get there, that way none wasted time waiting for the other.

So diligent.

They met at 15:30 in the Asakusa station.

They arrived almost at the same time, and it wasn't difficult to notice the gorgeous figure of Arisa in the crowd. She was also wearing very stylish clothes, well, as expected for a model.

Nanaka was in her girly-doll style as always.

They greeted, bowed almost too politely, and Nanaka followed Arisa out through the turnstiles.

Asakusa station was indeed big and had this incredible underground tunnels that connected very well with different parts of the city.

One of the exits was a shopping mall.

They walked outside to the cold, Nanaka shivered as she closed her eyes receiving the chilly punch. Arisa gave her an apologetic smile and continued walking.

To tell the truth, going out with Arisa was something new, not to mention weird.

If she could tell Nanaka from the past that she would be hanging out with Arisa Komiya, mostly because Arisa had suggested it, and it now fit in her moral dilemmas so she needed to cling to somebody, and that somebody was Arisa, Nanaka from the past would have given her a boring "Suwa face" and walked away not believing a thing.

But this was really happening.

Nanaka was nervous of course; why in the world would Arisa want to spend her Saturday afternoon with her, and not to mention going through the troubles of finding a place that fit their tastes.

When they hung out with Aqours or other members it was easier.

On the way, they chitchatted about the weather.

Yes, the freaking weather.

It was chilly and Nanaka was very weak to the cold, so it seemed like a good subject while walking.

They walked around 10 minutes to reach another big avenue; Nanaka at this point was really wondering if Arisa knew where the hell they were.

But it seemed that she knew.

They stopped at a small building, no more than 3 floors. The store spanned the first floor, and it seemed that the higher floors were apartments.

There was a green sign on top of the building, in which "Suzukien x Nanaya" was written.

Nanaka opened her eyes wide.

"Wo… this is nice…" murmured Nanaka while approaching the building; there was a small line coming out of the store.

"Yeah, right? I thought you might like this place…" said Arisa with a smug face.

"Well, I have never been here because it's far away… but sure, this is good." approved Nanaka, and both started doing the line with the rest of the people.

"Why here?" asked Nanaka.

"Well, I just wanted to treat you to somewhere nice; they have nice ice cream here…and tea… I thought it was a great combo, don't you think? Although it's pretty cold to be having ice cream…" said Arisa hugging herself because of the cold.

"Nonsense… there's nothing wrong with eating ice cream…" said Nanaka with a bright smile, "An Ice cream a day takes the frustration away!"

Arisa snorted.

"Is that your mojo?" she asked between giggles.

"It works for me… I eat an ice cream a day…" said Nanaka shrugging.

"So, this is good then?" asked Arisa finding her confidence.

"This is perfect," said Nanaka smiling.

Nanaka really eat an ice cream a day.

So, she understood very well the world of Ice cream parlors around Tokyo. And this Suzukien x Nanaya in Asakusa, was one of the best. No wonder why there was always a line outside the store, not minding what time of the year it was.

The store had just opened in January as a combo of Suzukien, the tea shop, and Nanaya the ice cream store that was in Shinjuku.

The specialty of the store was the matcha flavor, the Premium Nº7 gelato, which was apparently certified as the ice cream with the world's highest matcha content, and this was the only place stocking that delicacy outside Shizuoka prefecture.

So, yes, Arisa had good taste.

Nanaka smiled proudly.

And that was something she couldn't have with Shuka or Aina.

"By the way, great job yesterday… I laughed lots…" said Arisa moving along in the line.

"Eh?… The Niconama…?" asked Nanaka with her cheeks bright red.

Arisa laughed.

"Seriously, Shuka and Aiai are a piece of work…" said Arisa between giggles.

"They are…"

"I bet you missed me lots yesterday didn't you?" asked Arisa still holding back her laugh.

"Bah! It's good to fool around too…" Nanaka said trying to play cool; but the truth was that she had missed her, with Arisa on her team she could always win.

"You don't fool me, you missed me there, or you liked to be with the looneys?" tried Arisa again.

"It was more hilarious when you had the rainbow afro…" deadpanned Nanaka.

Then both giggled.

The line moved again.

"How was having something with Shuka?" asked Arisa with her normal tone.

Nanaka blinked.

Knowing Arisa the way she did, this invitation wasn't just because they were friends, or Arisa trying to be nice.

Rikako and King were in Korea, her two closest friends, so she might be feeling lonely too. And on the other hand, it was the perfect time to check on the very mess Nanaka was in at Arisa's eyes.

"Well, it was fun, Shuka is funny…" said Nanaka with a soft smile.

"But you will lose every time…" said Arisa giggling.

"Sometimes it's not about winning or losing…it's having a good time…" said Nanaka not convincingly; they shared some looks and broke into laugher.

"Not even you believe that! Do ya´?!" laughed Arisa.

Nanaka just laughed in her particular way.

"Gosh… that was good…" said Arisa moving another step in the line.

"Well, I laughed a lot, despite the fact that…well, I had to use the props and make a fool of myself…" said Nanaka also taking a step.

"Ah, it's true that you can't get bored with the looneys…" said Arisa reaching the door.

"That's true…" said Nanaka.

"So, everything cool?" asked Arisa.

"Uhm?" hummed Nanaka as she looked at Arisa with her eyebrows raised.

"Well, you two looked like you were having a good time… glad that Aina-san wasn't here to see that…" said Arisa in a serious tone.

Nanaka twitched one eyebrow.

Well, why am I surprised?

This is what she wanted to talk about, right?

"I don't think she cares that much," said Nanaka dryly.

"Oh, you think?" asked Arisa surprised.

"Yes I do…" said Nanaka without giving more details.

"Uhm…" hummed Arisa trying to find something else to say, but Nanaka came faster.

"Shuka and I are friends… we are colleagues… team members, and what we've talked about hundreds of times Arisa, Aqours is untouchable, we are really trying to live with each other amongst the members the best way we can, without damaging the Unit…"

"I… I know that…" said Arisa looking at Nanaka with her inquisitive eyes.

"Then?" asked Nanaka.

"You still love her," said Arisa taking her sight away from Nanaka.

Nanaka blinked and looked to her front; into the store.

It would have been foolish for Nanaka to try and deny it.

She had always known it, but had tried so hard to hide it from Aina -or for herself- but the truth was always there.

Her love had never faded.

"You know that already." said Nanaka in her "Suwa tone"

Arisa didn't say a thing.

The door opened and someone from the staff told them how the store worked; like in any parlor, they had to order their food at the desk, pay and then go out or if they wanted, try to find a table in the back.

Arisa took the lead, not sure why, and it felt totally different from when she was out with Anchan, Shuka or Aina; Nanaka being the oldest and tallest felt that it was her duty to do so, but here Arisa was older, taller, and more in charge of everything than Nanaka, so she just followed.

As Arisa had recommended, the matcha flavor nª7 was the favorite from the store, and Nanaka needed to have a try. Arisa just asked for the boring strawberry flavor. She said that there was nothing boring in strawberries and nothing could beat that incredible taste.

Nanaka just deadpanned about it.

They were in the unique and exclusive parlor that served the highest and richest matcha ice cream in Japan, and Arisa just asked for the plain, normal, and boring, strawberry…

Anyways, they were lucky and found a table at the back and took a seat.

They served the 3 small scoops of ice cream in some cute and traditional wood bowls on normal white plates, with the particular detail that it also came with a napkin in the color of the ice cream they chose.

"Oh! This is nice!" said Arisa with a happy tone once she sat.

"Eh? What is?" asked Nanaka still standing, taking off her coat.

"The plates, look, our flavors match the napkins and our characters colors…" said Arisa with a grin, "I'll take a picture…"

"Oh…right…" said Nanaka sitting and smiling to Arisa.

"'Dia-san's and 'Kanan-san's colors… what a nice coincidence…" said Arisa looking at the picture.

"Indeed…maybe this is the only thing I share with 'Kanan'…" said Nanaka in her boring tone.

"Don't say nonsense, now I bet you have more in common with her than before…" said Arisa putting her phone away, "You mind if I upload this picture tonight?"

"Eh? No...not at all… why though? For the LisAni thingie?" asked Nanaka now looking at her 3 tiny scoops, maybe a bit disappointed.

"Yes, we all have been uploading pictures to promote it, Aina did last week, you did when it was my turn, well…I'd like to return the favor…" said Arisa smiling.

"But this is ice cream pictures… it doesn't make any sense, I'm not in the picture…" said Nanaka dryly.

"Well, I can upload another picture with you… do we have that?" giggled Arisa.

"Just the two of us?….mmm…" said Nanaka grabbing her spoon, "I… guess we have with King or Aina? As 'Third Years' or AZALEA…"

"I see…" said Arisa also grabbing her spoon, in deep thought, "mmm I think I took one in the last event…but we should change that…"

"What?" asked Nanaka maybe more interested in the ice cream than the conversation.

"Us, pictures of us…" said Arisa softly.

They paused to try their ice creams.

Both said "Oishi" at the same time.

"This is really good, very 'matcha-like'…" said Nanaka curling the tip of her lips.

"Nothing beats strawberry…I'm happy…" said Arisa touching her left cheek in bliss.

"Good call, thank you Arisa," said Nanaka maybe too politely.

Arisa looked at her with kind eyes and smiled.

Arisa wasn't a bad person. Nanaka had always known that, but her insecurities, and everything that had happened with Production, made her take a very unpleasant behavior towards her, and everything had rolled like a snowball down a hill; every time Arisa sneaked herself into Nanaka's affairs she always took it the wrong way, and all this friendship/college relationship had become unpleasant for both sides.

Maybe if Nanaka wouldn't be so childish and stubborn they could have managed to have more instances like this.

"Well, I'm happy that you like it…next time we can bring more Aqours members…" said Arisa having another bite.

"Ah… I don't know if the looneys would fit in this place…" said Nanaka focused on her ice cream.

Arisa giggled.

"You might be right, maybe we can invite Rikako, and hang out as the boring trio…" said Arisa.

"She isn't that boring anymore…I guess…" said Nanaka in her dry tone.

"Oh, because now she is hanging more with Aikyan, right?" asked Arisa in a more serious tone.

"Guilty Kiss has that effect…I guess…" continued Nanaka.

"Uhm… I get your point… maybe our Unit is the only decent one… I mean, CYaRon! is just too noisy, I don't know how you managed to bare them yesterday…"

Nanaka giggled.

"It wasn't that bad…" said Nanaka having another bite, "…maybe because Shuka was there… It felt nice…"

Both stopped eating and shared a look.

Arisa gave her a worried one, while Nanaka just gave her a sad one.

"Do you miss her?" asked Arisa.

Nanaka looked at her changing her expression to a serious one.

"I don't think…I can talk about it—" tried Nanaka.

"Nanaka." Arisa cut in with a serious tone.

Nanaka snapped and bit her lips.

"Please, we…we are having a good time, I'm your friend… Aina-san isn't here… and I guess, no…I feel, that you need someone…let me be that someone…" said Arisa seriously.

Nanaka pouted a cutely. Deep in her heart, that was what she wanted; to rely on someone, and Arisa was the only person that could listen to her. She knew everything, she knew her relationship with Shuka, her wannabe relationship with Aina, and also, was there at her disposition to listen about it.

But it felt weird.

This was Arisa Freaking Komiya.

Nanaka nodded.

"Of course, I miss her…" said Nanaka in a sad tone. "But… I've been working so hard trying things out with Aina…"

"What's happening? I mean, your behavior with Shuka on the event a few weekends ago… it shocked me… it must have shocked Aina-san as well.." continued Arisa.

"Well, I… I don't know what's going on with Shuka lately….maybe she misses me too? At the event, those things just happened… we didn't think about it, or planned…" said Nanaka like thinking in every word, "the lineup works out just too good with Shuka, Aina is at the end of the line so I can't interact as I do with Shuka…"

"And feels natural for both of you…" finished Arisa.

Nanaka nodded softly.

The ate a few more scoops.

Then continued.

"I see, well, I have always said that you two never ended because of lack of love, so it's not weird to think there is still love in both of you… but… what about Aina-san?" asked Arisa with concern.

"Ah… Aina…" blew Nanaka tiredly.

"Aren't you two together now?" asked Arisa.

"Well, sort of…?" said Nanaka troubled.

"Eh? How is that?" asked Arisa surprised, "I thought both of you were inseparable, that's why I thought you were with her last Saturday…"

Nanaka shook her head.

"We are something….like a thing? We are together, but not together…?" said Nanaka, then frowned, that didn't make any sense either.

Arisa frowned.

"What?…what are you talking about?" asked Arisa confused.

"Well, that… yes, sounds…lame…"

"Yes, I mean, all that sexual tension both of you always had, and the glances…Aina is so into you—" Arisa was saying but Nanaka cut her off.

"And into other girls…" said Nanaka softly and with sadness.

Arisa raised her eyebrows.

"Oh, that…" said Arisa softly.

This wasn't something new to Arisa, they had shared some concerns about this before.

Nanaka made a bitter expression. This matcha ice cream seemed more bitter than ever.

"Arisa, we are not girlfriends, so there is no commitment… Aina…is free… to… do whatever…she wants…" said Nanaka holding back her tears.

"That means that you are too," said Arisa with determination.

"Yes, but I don't work that way…" said Nanaka softly, "I believe in one straight line relationship, if I commit to someone, it's just that someone, but it seems that Aina just can't work like that…"

"I see…" said Arisa eating, "But… it comes to my special attention that she has always been into you, why isn't it working then?"

Nanaka made a sad face.

"Well, there are factors, Aqours is one… we can't commit to each other because the rest of the members still believe in me and Shuka… " Arisa nodded, "So, if we can't commit, Aina feels free…"

"But you don't" sentenced Arisa licking her lips.

"Well, no…" said Nanaka sadly.

"I see, but as far as I can see, Aqours being a factor will soon fade… I mean, the other day Kanako was suspicious…—" Arisa was saying.

"Yesterday Aiai was too…" added Nanaka.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, she also asked me if I was dating them both at the same time…geez! Imagine that…" said Nanaka amused.

Arisa giggled.

"It made me tired…" said Arisa cleaning her mouth.

"I mean, I'm having a hard time with one of them, imagine with both… I couldn't take it…my heart can't take it…" said Nanaka eating.

"Well, of what I can see, it's gonna be about time for Aqours members to notice that something is off with you and Shuka, besides those glances and things in the event…you two seemed distant from each other… oh, well and yesterday…"

"Anchan also asked me about it… she is worried about Shuka…" said Nanaka.

"Oh, does she…?" said Arisa with concern.

"So, maybe we are not doing our job well?" said Nanaka with a frown.

Arisa shook her head.

"That is how it should be; you said you wanted to downplay your relationship with Shuka to later open up to the members… then if they see the distance between you two, it means that it's working…" said Arisa diligently.

"Yes…but—"Nanaka bit her lips.

"But?…"

"I don't think Shuka wants that anymore…" said Nanaka softly.

"And what do you want?… By the way, where is Aina-san in all of this…?" asked Arisa.

"Aina is… " started Nanaka, then grabbed her temples and started massaging them.

"A pain?"

"Yes… it can be said like that…" said Nanaka still massaging.

Arisa giggled.

"But, you knew that…" said Arisa waving that off.

Nanaka stopped massaging and looked at Arisa with sadness.

Maybe too much sadness, because Arisa stopped giggling and gave her a very worried look.

"What is it Nanaka?" she asked.

Nanaka pouted, holding back her tears.

"Aina…well, Aina takes this just too lightly…" said Nanaka as she covered her face.

"How is that? This is Aina-san, the goofy Oiji-san…. what did you expect?" said Arisa.

Nanaka withdrew her hands from her face.

"I believe that I'm just a whim for her, she wanted me so bad, well, I wanted her as well, I can't blame her, but once we were together…. she…she is just so reckless… so impulsive… so...— ah…" Nanaka lost her words as her eyes filled with tears, maybe remembering their last encounter, it was just too painful.

"Nanaka…" called Arisa softly.

"She…she is always saying that I'm not ready for commitment, because I still have feelings for Shuka; she isn't wrong, but she doesn't make it easier… because I want…I want to be with her…but, I can't control her… she is always drooling over other girls…and in my presence…" continued Nanaka holding onto her demure attitude, and trying hard to not look so frail in front of Arisa.

"Control her?" asked Arisa with a frown.

"Well, it's not that I want to leash up her or something…but Arisa…I…" she swallowed, "I need… to be able to control her; her behavior with other girls, her recklessness….her impulses— ah— she just…takes what she wants, and— and—thinks it's a game… a joke— she just…" Nanaka covered her face once again.

"Suwawa..." called Arisa now with a worried tone, "Did…did Aina-san do something to you?"

Nanaka didn't want to say anything.

Maybe she had said enough, she couldn't say it out loud. It was shameful.

And Arisa, knowing Nanaka the way she did, didn't ask again.

"So, Aina-san has some... impulses…" said Arisa in her diligent tone.

Nanaka nodded still hiding behind her hands.

"Let me see if I get this right…" continued Arisa, trying to follow this conversation ignoring the fact that Nanaka just wanted to disappear.

"You still have feelings for Shuka, which I understand, but you want to commit with Aina, neither of you can't make it official because of Aqours, a factor that might disappear eventually, but in the meantime, you both are trying to work together, but not being together…"

Arisa made a pause because it sounded dumb.

She cleared her throat.

"…And, because you aren't officially together, this gives Aina-san the liberty to be free and do whatever she wants…am I right?" added Arisa.

Nanaka nodded, still behind her hands.

"And…those things, doing the hell she wants, is looking for girls, being reckless, and….being impulsive with you…" finished Arisa.

A heavy silence fell.

"Nanaka…" called Arisa softly.

Nanaka shyly removed her hand off her face with clear shame and sadness.

Arisa gave her a sad gaze but with a kind smile.

"I'm sorry… I hope you had told me sooner…" said Arisa softly, Nanaka rested her hands on her lap.

"I—I'm not proud…" murmured Nanaka.

"I know, and it's not easy, so… I'm glad that you are telling me this…" said Arisa with a soft tone.

Nanaka looked again at Arisa, with shame.

"But, …geez, this is weird, I mean, I used to talk a lot with Aina-san, she….she loves you… she was always looking for you, and I believed that you were having the time of your life…" said Arisa trying to understand

"I know… but, well… her way of love is…how can I say it…different from mine…." said Nanaka with difficulty.

"How is that? Love is love…" tried Arisa.

"Yes, that's what I thought, but with Aina love works in a different way, I guess..." said Nanaka putting herself together, "I know she loves me, and I love her too, she is cute, caring, and she has always cheered for me… but, there are some things that I don't get about Aina…"

Arisa nodded seriously.

"For example; she is always blaming me for not being ready for commitment because of Shuka, but truth is that she doesn't want to commit …she, geez!, Arisa she was talking about going to Korea to look for girls…right to my face… so reckless…" said Nanaka annoyed.

"Oh…" snapped Arisa, then giggled, "yes…that's Aina-san…you knew that…"

"Well, yes, but if she says that she loves ME, then she should stop flirting with other girls… or at least not doing it in my face! Then, how can we commit like that… I mean, I like girls too, but I'm not drooling over them or in front of Aina; Shuka is another topic..."

Arisa nodded.

Then Arisa adopted a thinking pose, she took some minutes to later fix her gaze on Nanaka.

"Let me ask you something…" she started; Nanaka nodded, "What if, ok, you two commit, become an official couple… you think Aina will drop her habit of flirting with girls?"

Nanaka opened her eyes wide and raised her eyebrows.

"Would she?" asked Arisa again.

Nanaka bit her lips as she looked at her lap in shame.

"No.," said Nanaka softly, and then looked at Arisa with a sad expression.

Arisa gave her an apologetic smile.

"You can't change that part of her, it's in her nature; so if you want to commit to her, you need to love that part of her too…" said Arisa softly.

"I don't….I don't think I can…" said Nanaka, "I mean, I love her. Arisa, I do. But sometimes she… I don't know, I don't freaking know when she is serious, or when she is joking… if she did stuff to me…it's because she is fooling around, or if she means it… It…it puzzles me, I don't have any control over anything with her… and I don't want to sound like a control freak, but… sometimes you need some guarantees or assurance that at least we are on the same page…"

"You don't think you are?" asked Arisa in a sad tone.

"Well, I guess not, I mean, for her, flirting with other girls is pretty normal, to drool about your butt, or sleeping with other girls—"Nanaka was saying.

"She talks about my butt?" asked Arisa surprised.

Nanaka deadpanned.

Arisa's cheeks became red, but then she bowed apologizing.

"Sorry, sorry…"

"Please…?" tried Nanaka; Arisa nodded.

"So, she is doing other girls besides you?" asked Arisa outraged.

Nanaka looked at her with a sad gaze; Arisa bit her lips.

"Does this surprise you?" asked Nanaka slowly.

"Well, yes… I mean," Arisa cleared her throat, "Suwawa, it wasn't a joke when she used to talk to me about you, she was dying to be with you, and I saw all the things she did for you, how she was always worried about you, and now you tell me these kinds of things? I'm speechless…"

"Well, I guess that now that she 'has me', she got bored? I'm a boring person—" Nanaka was saying.

"Nah! Stop it!" interrupted Arisa, "This is clearly a moral level scale problem, your morals are different from hers, period."

Nanaka blinked, speechless.

"For her, the normal thing is that you two are something, but in the meantime, she can do whatever the hell she wants, right?" asked Arisa; Nanaka nodded, "But same goes for you, you can do the hell you want, but you don't do such things because of your moral scale, that isn't normal for you, because you want to commit to her…"

Nanaka nodded, that was how her scale worked.

"And she said that we can't commit because I'm not ready, plus the Aqours factor… that…if I don't publicly break up with Shuka in front of Aqours, then…then we can't commit…" said Nanaka troubled.

"Oh how convenient…" said Arisa getting comfy.

"You think?" asked Nanaka narrowing her eyebrows.

"Of course! Suwawa you will never do such things, and Aina-san knows it! You will never put Aqours in such a delicate state of for a civil war because of something like this, and this way she can still have her way…" finished Arisa extending her arms to this realization.

Nanaka bit her lips.

"And I'll tell you what, imagine you break up with Shuka in front of everyone on Monday, then Aqours collapses into civil war, do you think, do you really think, that Aina-san will change her behavior? That she will change her old ways?… Sorry, but I don't think so…" said Arisa now returning to her serious tone.

Nanaka made a bitter face.

"And I'm really sorry because I was the one who told you that you looked better with someone like Aina-san than a brat like Shuka, but… geez! Now that I know these kinds of things…I'm really sorry…" said Arisa with a sincere tone.

"Please don't treat Shuka like that… and, I know…it's not your fault…I thought….I thought that Aina's behavior would change once she was with me… but…I guess she isn't… and she is putting the blame on me, on Aqours, even Shuka, for the only reason for her to still get her way…"

"Have you talked about it…?" asked Arisa.

Nanaka gave her a sad look.

"Of course, merely because I was too… dependent on her, I was trying to behave like a girlfriend with her, which of course, she didn't like… she said I have 'Loneliness issues'… that I was clinging to her... but now I'm doubting that…" said Nanaka troubled, "She just sent me home while she is having a great time in Korea…"

Arisa snorted.

"The way that I see it, she just wants to have you as a wife that waits for her at home, loyally, patiently and ready for when she needs real love…" said Arisa finishing her ice cream.

Nanaka made a bitter expression, then she looked at her melting ice cream.

She didn't know what was more bitter, the ice cream, or the conversation.

She tried another scoop of her treat.

"I'm really sorry about this Nanaka," said Arisa with clear concern.

"I'm sorry too, because, I know she isn't a bad person. Arisa, don't get me wrong, I like her, I love her… but maybe…maybe we work differently? And what is normal for her isn't for me… and …and—" Nanaka was saying clearly troubled.

"And this relationship is destined to fail." sentenced Arisa.

Nanaka pouted holding back her tears once again.

"I get your point, but is this really going to be healthy? Both work differently and this doesn't mean that both of you don't love each other, because I can see you do, but at what cost? One of you must change their ways for you to be together, and I'm afraid that Aina-san isn't going to be the one…" said Arisa with a sad tone.

Nanaka looked at her with a bitter expression.

Try to feel satisfied…

"And I see that the one who's struggling with this is you, not her…" said Arisa finishing her ice cream.

Nanaka narrowed her eyebrows and brought her right hand to her chin to think.

Maybe yes, Nanaka had the worst part, but that was because Aina was always playing it safe. Nanaka was the one with the toxic relationship, Aina was "the good friend" beside her, later when she was done with the old relationship, Aina was the one pushing for her to get over Shuka fast and soon for her to make the move. It wasn't that Nanaka had stopped loving Shuka, but Aina was there and Shuka understood her place as the Ex and started fading away.

And Nanaka made the decision to cross the line.

She wanted that, even if Aina was pushing the issue.

But in the end, the ball had always been in Nanaka's court; Aina didn't want such a bother.

In the end, all efforts were made by Nanaka, not Aina.

She just waited for Nanaka to do everything.

End with Shuka, heal - or try to-, cross the line with her, publicly break up with Shuka, destroy Aqours, commit to her, accept the fact that she was a natural flirt and love her as she was.

And what did Aina do? She just "waited".

And she "waited" using her time wisely with other girls or minding her own business.

Because in the end, she knew that Nanaka wasn't going to sabotage Aqours.

But everything that happened, had happened because of her decisions, how could Nanaka know that Aina would drastically change from "the good friend" to what she was now?

She couldn't.

"Uhm…" hummed Nanaka annoyed.

"What?" asked Arisa.

Nanaka looked at her with a darkened expression.

"I guess I needed to live this…" said Nanaka in deep thought.

"Did you?" asked Arisa in a sad tone.

Nanaka nodded.

"How can I even know what lays ahead if I don't go? I saw a chance so I tried to take it slow, and I know I just can't leave these things behind anymore…" said Nanaka with her sight lost in what was left of her ice cream.

"I'm really sorry you had to live through this kind of experience…." said Arisa with a soft tone.

"I guess I needed to; we had this sexual tension, we gave it a chance, and it seems that it wasn't what we wanted… I don't doubt that she's had a bad experience with all this…" said Nanaka grabbing her spoon again.

"Oh, I know she has suffered….watching you with Shuka and all…" said Arisa giggling.

Nanaka tried to finish her ice cream.

"But that is what I don't get." said Nanaka, but paused to eat, "She was suffering while I was with Shuka, but I'm not with her anymore, I want… " she swallowed, "I want to commit to her, but then she shuts me outs… and keeps blaming me about it…"

Arisa blinked fast.

"I don't….quite…understand either…" said Arisa narrowing her eyebrows, "It's like, a spoiled child that threw tantrums for a toy, and once it gets the toy, doesn't want it anymore…"

Nanaka finished her ice cream and left her spoon.

"This…is so bitter…" added Nanaka closing her eyes

Arisa giggled.

They made a pause, maybe to digest this heavy conversation.

"So, what do you want?" asked Arisa.

"Now, something sweet …" said Nanaka clearing her throat; Arisa giggled again.

"About Aina-san…?" clarified Arisa.

"Ah… well, I guess there's nothing to do now…" said Nanaka cleaning her lips.

"Oh, yes, she is in Korea…" said Arisa with almost a "doh".

"Yes…"

"But I mean, when she comes back?" asked Arisa looking at her watch.

"Well, I don't know…I…I like my time with her…when… she is not that impulsive. Actually, we want to spend Christmas together…" said Nanaka shyly.

"Oh, really? What do you have in mind? That's very romantic…" asked Arisa with a smile.

"I don't know; I saw that Rikako went to see the Aqours's Tree in Odaiba, maybe we could go see it?" said Nanaka thoughtfully.

"Remember to upload pictures, that surely will give you lots of NanaAinya points!" said Arisa in a happy tone.

"Yes…" said Nanaka softly.

They stayed silent for a few seconds.

That sounded like a very good plan, with, of course, the Aina that everybody saw in practice, but not the one who was in the actual relationship with Nanaka.

"You want to stick with her?" asked Arisa breaking the silence.

"Eh?..." snapped Nanaka surprised.

"To…try to be with her… even if you know how the rules stand…" said Arisa in a serious tone.

"Well, I…I want to…keep trying, I love her, maybe I can make this work? Somehow… but I don't know how; my way doesn't work…" said Nanaka with her gaze lost in the empty ice cream cup.

"Ah, I see, if this is something you really want then change tactics… try doing it her way…" suggested Arisa

"Her way?…" asked Nanaka.

"Yes… I mean, stick with her rules…" said Arisa shrugging.

"Uhm…" hummed Nanaka softly.

"Suwawa, there are other ways of loving…" said Arisa with a smile, "Maybe that's what Aina-san is trying to teach you… You need to be satisfied as well… it's your relationship too…"

Nanaka gave her a weak smile.

Maybe Arisa was right.

If Nanaka's way of love wasn't being fruitful, then she needed to change tactics.

Aina wasn't going to change, and if she wanted to succeed in this wannabe relationship, she needed to change.

If Nanaka was stubborn enough to stick with Shuka's tantrums and all for a year trying to fix everything for the sake of the relationship, it was fair for Nanaka to "try to fix" this too. Give Aina the chance, but changing tactics.

Arisa and Nanaka left the ice cream parlor and walked back to the station.

The kept talking about a few things non-Aina related such as Arisa's event, where it almost became a monologue but was Nanaka pleased to make Arisa the focus of the conversation and rest a bit from her mental pudding.

Arisa now had her own fan club, and was supervising all the details for the events of December 18th, she indeed was excited to do it and wanted it to be perfect. That was why she had taken some time from the Sunshine activities to settle it.

It was clearly a surprise to her when Nanaka said that thanks to that, the Chief had found himself out of members to send to the "Joysound" chain on the next day, and he needed to ask the "KaYoBy" trio to do it.

Arisa understood the situation perfectly.

So when they went into a specific station to go their separate ways, Arisa said her goodbyes with a kind "You are lucky that that's not on camera or live; enjoy yourself Nanaka, you deserve it, remember that there other ways to love."

She bowed politely; Nanaka indeed thanked her for her time, the treat, and that despite the topic it had been a good talk and she really needed someone to clear her chest.

Of course, Arisa was kind and bowed.

"Anytime, Nanaka"

And with that, they went their separate ways.

Nanaka was waiting on the platform, cold to the bone.

It was somewhat late and already dark when she felt her phone vibrating in her pocket.

Somehow she had forgotten that things as cell phones existed.

She took it out and felt her heart in her throat.

It was a message; Shuka's message.

Osuwa! ´･ᴗ･

Today is your day! (๑ᴗ๑)

Are you excited?! ( •̀ᄇ• ́)ﻭ

Nanaka couldn't help but smile.

It was a warm feeling.

She typed with shivering fingers.

Hi Shuka! (ᴗ)

Well, I forgot about it (-｡-;

Which wasn't a lie.

It was almost as if Shuka was waiting for her response.

Eh?! really? ()

I'm excited! （๑๑）

Nanaka frowned, why would Shuka be excited about Nanaka's appeal on television?

Hahaha, why is that? ( 〃．．)

Your appeal was long ago! (艸`)

Nanaka giggled, but somehow she felt warm, it was…

Sweet…

She closed her eyes feeling the train pass in front of her with a warm breeze.

The train stopped.

Yes, I know! (๑ゝڡ๑)

But today I'll see Osuwa on TV! And being cute! (๑๑)

I want to see you! (''●)

As the train opened the doors, Nanaka's heart stopped.

She felt her lips shivering.

The sound of the warning bell for the closing doors snapped her out of her blank state and boarded the train.

Shuka wanted to see her.

Nanaka indeed felt warm inside, like if some small shine of hope had sparked in the darkness to warm her up, a bit of moonshine to guide her.

She stepped onto the train. The doors closed behind her.

What should she write to her?

Nanaka stood looking at the screen for a full 5 minutes, the conversation, trying to snap something out of her mind.

She felt butterflies in her belly, but with the angst of not knowing what to do.

Nanaka thought on asking Arisa what the hell should she do; she felt so hopeless, so weak. So damn confused!

She changed her conversation to Aina's.

Of course, nothing.

She bit her lips, felt her hands shaking.

What should I do...What should I do...What should I do...What should I do…

She closed her eyes in clear pain.

What should she do?!

After everything that was happening with Aina, their last encounter that left her high and dry; Aina's impulsiveness that made her doubt, and this conversation with Arisa that maybe hadn't cleared anything but just two things…

She loved Aina, yes.

But she was who needed to change.

There are other ways to love.

Aina's way.

Nanaka opened her eyes, she bit her lips.

Changed the conversation to Shuka's…

Typed.

I want to see you too.

Sent.

She closed her eyes, she felt hot as cold sweat ran down her spine and very uneasy.

The train didn't make any stop until the last station.

Trying to feel satisfied…

In my word… I am looking for…

.

.

.

Joysound was Japan's first broadcast karaoke brand.

Japanese karaoke shops were renowned worldwide for their high quality and spotless rooms, But towering over these standards, the Joysound brand was outfitted with the latest cutting-edge technology, space, and sounds environment possessing incredible acoustics, delicious food, and superior service.

Besides the fantastic stores the brand had around the country, it was also the first brand to provide online karaoke and offer the largest selection of anime songs in the market.

With that said, of course, a franchise as Love Live! needed, no, had to be in this huge chain and karaoke industry, so they made a collaboration, branded one of the locals in Ginza, and sent the only 3 available Aqours members to sign and promote the chain and the Franchise.

And they just couldn't do it on another day, so it was on their day off.

It was Sunday, December 11th, and maybe it was the chilliest day ever.

But that little detail was just some minor thing for Nanaka, which was a weird thing, remembering that she was so weak to the cold. That day, the chills didn't matter, that day, even the weak sun felt brighter than ever.

It was true that it was her day off and she would need to spend it working, but she felt happy.

She had been so paralyzed by her conversation with Shuka the previous night that without thinking she ended up in the last station of the Yamanote line.

Ok, not the last one, because that line ran in a circle, but, in a station where she needed to get off and found that she was closer to Kawagoe than her actual station.

She was halfway to Saitama, with the only idea of seeing Shuka.

But, unfortunately for her, Shuka was in Odaiba with her brother and Mama Saito seeing the Aqours' tree. So when that information came into Nanaka's knowledge she was already halfway to her hometown.

Pouting like a lost child, she determined that she didn't want to spend that night alone, so she took the Tobu-Tojo line and headed home.

Of course, her mother was surprised because she didn't expect her to be there, but was always happy to see her child.

She received a full home-cooked meal and later watched the LisAni show with her parents, who of course cheered for her and praised her in lots.

But of course, Nanaka didn't come home sad, clearly seeing her parents and being spoiled was something she enjoyed, but also because when Shuka told her that there was no chance of seeing her that night, but seeing that Nanaka was headed to Saitama, why not share the train to Ginza the next day?

Nanaka smiled as if it was Christmas.

Of course, she said "ok", and then enjoyed the show.

Somehow after the talk with Arisa and now Shuka filing her mind, there was no Aina troubling her.

The only news she had from Aina, were the ones that Nanaka could see in Rikako's or King's Twitter, the rest were just some words on the Aqours LINE because of course, all Aqours members had gathered online to cheer for Nanaka, but the trio in Korea just sent her good lucks and that was it because they couldn't see it.

Arisa did upload the ice cream picture with another of them in their last event. Both cute and smiling at the camera.

That was indeed a nice touch, and it made Nanaka feel proud of herself; she took a step forward with Arisa that evening and felt that she had gained a good ally in this madness.

But of course, it made Nanaka sad that Aina wasn't there to cheer for her as she did when it was her turn, or to have some compliments after that, but Aina just quoted that Nanaka was always cute, no matter what she did or where she appeared, "Nana was always cute".

At that moment, Nanaka just deadpanned and buffed the phone away.

She had better things to think about, like what to wear on the next day.

So, the next day, Nanaka was sure to be fresh and nice.

She did her pigtails, Shuka's favorite hairstyle on Nanaka's head; wore a nice and cute dress, put on her best makeup (or the best she could find at her parents' house), and her widest smile ever.

It was weird because she hadn't felt this anxious in months, so eager, maybe happy, feeling a bunch of butterflies in her belly.

This was Shuka, her Ex, but somehow she felt brighter.

And if she thought about it, it was even absurd because the Joysound in Ginza was about 15 minutes from her place in downtown and now she needed to take an hour and a half ride.

But, she wasn't going alone.

Shuka waited for her in a specific station to make the combination towards their final destination and seemed that both were equally eager.

Nanaka tried to be cool, but couldn't help having her goofy smile all the time, and Shuka who was more histrionic with her emotions, just jogged to meet her (also because Nanaka walked too slow). And Shuka hugged her. Again.

And that was enough to make the day perfect.

They boarded the train and Shuka never let go of her arm; Nanaka never complained though. It felt right.

The first thing Shuka did was complimenting Nanaka's hair; of course, Nanaka knew that it would add points.

Then they talked about the broadcast, and how Nanaka looked cute, and that her appeal time had been excellent. Shuka even told her that she might win the poll for LisAni Girl 2017.

Truth be told, Nanaka just didn't care about that poll at that moment, because Shuka was all over her, her smile, her hair that was also fairly done, and all attention was on Nanaka, which of course made the hour and 30 minutes pass by in the blink of an eye.

It was as if they had never broken up.

They talked like they always did; Shuka clung to her arm as she used too while telling her all her adventures of the day before in Venus Fort with her siblings.

Nanaka was indeed a good listener and heard Shuka out with her kind smile, but her mind wandered around her companion more than into the stories. She could clearly see that Shuka was excited about them being together that day because, despite Shuka's efforts to wear makeup, she could clearly see bags under her eyes, her nails being done and her hair being totally straight. Meaning that Shuka cared enough about meeting her that she had gone through all the troubles of even ironing her hair.

It made Nanaka happy.

And maybe Shuka too.

They didn't even notice that they had arrived at the meeting point holding hands.

Aiai was who had pointed it out to them.

"OH! Wow! Someone had a great night…." said Aiai outside a "Happy Science Ginza Book Cafe" store; Nanaka and Shuka stopped in front of her, shared some looks and then some smiles; Shuka smiled wide at Nanaka, that smile that she adored, full teeth with her cheeks bright red and then went closer to Nanaka's shoulder.

Nanaka's cheeks became bright too, even if both knew that nothing had happened between them last night, maybe both were feeling the same warm sensation from three months ago.

Then they remembered that Aiai was there, so they fixed their sight on her, she smiled weirdly at them.

"Please, don't start doing it in the Karaoke today…" said Aiai in a teasing tone; Shuka laughed.

"Afternoon Aiai," said Nanaka in her diligent tone and bowed politely.

"Greetings!" said Shuka with her happy tone.

"Why are you out here?" asked Nanaka.

"Well, I was waiting for you because you might get lost searching for the place…" said Aiai in a more serious tone.

"Oh, how so?" asked Shuka in her cute tone.

"They gave us the wrong address," said Aiai moving to her left and pointing at a black building.

Shuka moved abruptly and of course, Nanaka who was holding her hand moved along.

"They told us it was in one Chome, but is in that building… in two Chome" said Aiai.

"Oh…" said Nanaka with no interest at all.

It was a tall black building with an "Ishikawa Hyakumangoku" Shop, something like a souvenir store.

"Look! Osuwa! We can get some ice cream later…" said Shuka with a happy tone, completely ignoring the fact that they were there to work.

"I'd love that…" said Nanaka with a cute tone.

"Hey hey!" called Aiai, "You are being too sweet! Remember the rules! We aren't alone here…"

"Eh? What are you talking about Furi?" asked Shuka surprised.

"The Chief is here…with the Staff…" said Aiai and then she started moving towards the main entrance of the black building.

Nanaka and Shuka shared some looks.

Then smiled.

Yes, there was still love.

They followed Aiai.

Of course, the building was nothing like Nanaka had expected.

Starting by the fact that she wasn't expecting that the Karaoke was hidden inside a building. A big chain as Joysound was supposed to be the front facade of a building, or a store, something jazzier.

Here the Karaoke was hidden between floors five and nine, so they had sent Aiai downstairs to greet the love birds because which one was more clueless while being together.

But when Shuka asked Aiai how had she found the building; she laughed and said;

"Easy, there's a HUGE 'Joysound' sign all over the top of the building, but I guess you love birds were more into how to fuck each other than to see over Suwawa's head."

"There's nothing interesting above Osuwa's head…" murmured Shuka; Nanaka squeezed her hand.

Then she realized that it had been 3 months since they had held like that.

She froze.

They were in the elevator; Shuka and Aiai started some conversation that Nanaka just couldn't get.

She blinked.

Of course, she was drunk from the sensation of seeing Shuka again after an almost cathartic afternoon with Arisa were her wannabe relation with Aina had been dissected by them and their conclusions that she just forgot that she and Shuka were done.

They were Exes.

And all this time they had been acting being together with nothing but their smiles, but today they had arrived holding hands and being as mellow as they used to.

The elevator bell rang, and as if it was on cue, Nanaka let go of Shuka's hand.

Of course, Shuka gave her a concerned glance, but maybe she misunderstood the motion as that they arrived at where the Staff was, so they needed to act professionally, so she just nodded with a smile.

Nanaka gave her a sad look.

They walked towards the reception and indeed there he was, The Chief and his Staff.

But, his staff was reduced to just two people; the Creepy assistant and the person in charge of the wardrobe.

This was an official matter, so they needed to change into their characters' outfits.

Nanaka wasn't expecting that. Actually she was hoping that this would just be something short and almost meaningless. After all, this was supposed to be her day off.

But a job was a job.

They gave them another room to change into their outfits.

But at that point, Nanaka's bright vibe somehow faded.

She was troubled about her behavior.

And started repeating almost all her afternoon with Arisa, trying to remember the feeling, and later her drunkenness, but it was of no use, she was now aware that her feelings were somehow wrong.

Wrong in her own moral scale.

"Osuwa…you ok?" asked Shuka at her side, of course, she was ready with her outfit.

Nanaka was halfway with the skirt and was only wearing her bra on her top half.

Both locked gazes.

Shuka froze in her spot when their eyes meet; her cheeks became wild red as her eyes started traveling from Nanaka's eyes, towards her collarbone, and ended up on Nanaka's cute breast.

Shuka licked her lips.

The sexual tension they used to have too.

It was unbearable, the feeling of desiring something that at the same time was so wrong.

Wrong in every term, her every cell was screaming that it was wrong, wrong to feel, wrong to desire, but at the same time, they also were yearning for her touch, for her lips, for her love, to feel bright again.

To feel loved again, and that was something she was looking for…

"HEY! Stop it!" called Aiai from the door, she was about to open it, "Osuwa, hurry up!"

Nanaka blinked a few times, breaking the spell they had. Of course, Shuka was even closer to her, almost too much.
She could smell her perfume.

"I'm sorry…" said Nanaka moving fast to finish getting ready.

Shuka felt uneasy too and tried to move out of the room with her ears and cheeks red of embarrassment.

"Hey! Are ya' calling Osuwa 'Osuwa', that's my nickname for her…" said Shuka annoyed, moving out with Aiai.

"What? I think it's cute, you didn't mind on Friday…" Aiai was saying as she closed the door.

Nanaka finished putting her shirt on and tied her green handkerchief, with shaking hands and heavy breathing.

She was already sweating.

What I'm looking for…
Evermore…
Satisfy...
Evermore…
In my world…

She closed her eyes.
Her thoughts were just a mess...

She took a deep breath.

Brought her hands to her temples to massage them.

This wasn't the moment to start with a mental pudding in her brain, she needed to get it together and get out of that room and work.

With that in mind, and trying to hold into her mask the best she could, Nanaka went out to meet everybody.

The job was somewhat easy, it was merely posing, taking pictures, and signing some walls.

They went into a room fully branded with Sunshine, from the door to the walls, and tables.

All the characters were in the "Kimi no Kokoro wa Kagayaiteru kai?" as decorations, there were some screenshots from the PV as well.

Once inside, they received some sharpies and started on their duty of signing on the wall with their characters. Funny thing was that the characters were displayed in the official lineup, so Kanan and You were together.

Of course, Shuka pointed that out with a grin. Nanaka smiled at her and tried to ignore or suppress everything she could feel at that moment, but truth was that while time passed she was even less aware of her own doing.

They gave them some samples of the collaboration drinks, but they decided to share, even if Aiai complained because that was something more for couples, but they all laughed about it and told her that she needed to do it with them because it would look too weird if just two of them drank from one glass and the other didn't, she agreed and they posed for some cute pictures of the three of them drinking from the same drink.

Nanaka and Shuka closer, of course.

Then they put the music at full volume and enjoyed some Aqours Karaoke, of course, taking pictures of it.

There was something about Aiai and Shuka that no matter what, they always did funny stuff, so this also helped Nanaka to be more in the present and not that much in her mind.

They played with the props the room had, the music instrument that could also be found in normal Karaokes, but at the end of the day, it was a good afternoon well spent, singing, drinking, eating, and laughing.

It was dark but not that late when they left the building. But it was chilling to the bones.

The Chief congratulated the girls for the wonderful job and asked them to upload the best pictures to their Twitter for promotion. Then he offered to pay for the girl's ride back home, which only Aiai accepted.

Nanaka said she lived 15 minutes away from there and it was still early to catch a train, and Shuka said she had plans in the area.

The Chief and his Staff bowed and said their goodbyes, leaving the girls.

They were waiting for Aiai's taxi to arrive when she broke the silence;

"So what the hell are you gonna do here so late?" she asked towards Shuka.

"Eh?… well, I promised Osuwa to have some ice cream…" said Shuka with a goofy tone.

"EH?! Ice cream?! In this cold, Suwawa you freak…" said Aiai in a teasing tone.

Nanaka giggled.

She was about to talk when Shuka interrupted.

"An Ice cream a day takes the frustration away!" she said with a happy and wide smile.
She knew Nanaka.

Nanaka snapped.

"Eh?! What the hell—" Aiai was saying when a cold breeze passed through them making them shiver.

Maybe it was just a reflex, but Shuka hugged Nanaka tightly.

"Geez! It's freezing!" said Shuka clinging her warm body to Nanaka's.

Nanaka's heart stopped.

She softly returned the embrace.

"Hey, my ride is here…" said Aiai in her squeaky tone; she looked at the "couple" hugging and just raised an eyebrow, "You need to go to a hotel, your sweet sex vibe is killing me…" she said in a joking tone.

Shuka and Nanaka giggled as the taxi arrived.

Aiai boarded the taxi and waved off while it drove away.

They stayed there for a few seconds, hugging.

Nanaka somehow just couldn't feel the cold; Shuka's body was so warm, so soft, and also she smelled so good.

Something started to crash inside her, maybe her mask was falling apart.

Nanaka closed her eyes trying to hold onto this feeling.

"Hey… Nana-chan…" called Shuka softly from her chest.

Nanaka opened her eyes slowly. Not minding that Shuka had just called her by her private pet name.

"Yes, Sweetie…?" said Nanaka in a sweet tone.

Then silence.

Shuka took her time to lift her head and lock gazes with Nanaka.

Her face was so close to hers, that she could even take her sweet scent in her. The thin air breaking inside their lungs.

Somehow, Nanaka felt in the clouds, lost in Shuka's eyes, lost in her, and in the love that shined through her eyes.

The feeling she had felt in the morning was still there, and maybe they both knew it…

At the end of the dark, there was some shine, even if it was pale as moonlight.

Something shattered inside both girls.

"Do… do you still want the ice cream…?" asked Shuka licking her lips.

Nanaka blinked a few times. Went even closer to her.

And said;

"We should get something sweeter…"

… I am looking for...

-0oo0-

---

Notes:

Where there was fire, ashes remains ... 3
My heart can't take much drama.
I imagine that Nanaka's heart also was in a messy state...

So!
As I said in the beginning, we are totally up for Discussions! insights and thoughts...
Thanks so much for the Comments, Kudos, and Likes!
We remind you that both Authors can be found on Twitter or in my case (Misha) on Instagram as well with hot and crazy doodles! ( Mishaworks & NylundSarah)

That's it, See you in June! (ŐωŐ人)
And stay SAFE!