Does the Magical world have dentists? What if a wizard gets a toothache he cannot spell away?
1961
19th May 1961
Dear Gellert
Forgive my tardiness in not writing to you sooner. I have found myself in an awkward situation – get your mind out of the gutter – I can hear you snickering some joke about my pants caught down. Just to update you, I have forgone trousers entirely under my robes. I seem to have developed a bad toothache that no number of pain-relieving spells could ease. It is starting to interfere with my teaching. The infirmary suggested that I consult at expert at St Mungo's for teeth maladies.
May I check in with you if you know any spells to ease toothache? Anything the Elder Wand might be able to fix?
Yours in agony
Albus
Spring 1961
Dear Albus
Once more you tease me. I now imagine turning you upside down before the new students so everyone gets an eyeful of your hairy butt. I do hope you are not yet incontinent and gave up trousers for greater ease in using the lavatory.
I cringe that you are using the fabled Elder Wand for such inane tasks like stirring tea or combing your hair. You still comb, do you? As for your toothache, I thought a Muggle-lover like you will be acquainted with that Muggle profession called the dentist. You can blame your love for sweets and probably not brushing regularly for that bad tooth. Or are you too chicken to have your tooth pulled?
May I humbly offer my services? What I need is a length of string, and an unlocked cell door. The door is heavy enough for the job. No need for using the Elder Wand… You must respect its power, Albus. Or it might just hop off to the next owner – maybe some nipper who sneaked into your office to pinch it. The wand is meant for great magical feats, you moron.
Take it from me that our dental professionals pale in comparison to the Muggles. I have lost almost all my teeth by now. Some from being thrashed by the guards and the remainder from botched spellwork. There was Muggle dentist in Berlin, whose services I used back in the 1930s. I doubt he survived the Muggles' war. Believe he was part-Jewish. If there is a decent dental healer in St Mungo's, can you arrange for a visit to me? I would like to be able to chew my food properly.
Yours hopefully
Gellert
15th June 1961
Dear Gellert
I have finally gotten my toothache fixed. Do you remember Tina? She put me in touch with her eldest nephew who was sadly born a squib but fortunately for me became a dentist. Dr Kowalski had to remove two of my teeth due to cavities and I got the full lecture on dental hygiene. There are two more appointments to do fillings. I suppose he could fit you up with a set of dentures, but the Ministry rejected the suggestion on grounds of the Statutes of Secrecy.
Your friend
Albus Dumbledore
Summer 1961
Dear Albus
Oh, who can forget Tina and her husband Newt Scamander– the most interfering pair ever. Even in the boondocks of China, that Newt would find a way to spoke my wheel. Glad they are now your problem. I read that woman has retired from MACUSA and moved to Britain to be with her hubby.
About Queenie and that Muggle. Good to know that they at least produced offspring with some use, even as a squib. I must be getting soft. Did Queenie manage to pass her talents to any of her children? Or did the Muggle side of the family wipe out the magic? Are any of the children from the Scamanders and Kowalskis attending Hogwarts?
Yours sincerely
Gellert Grindelwald
20th June 1961
Dear Gellert
Funny that you should mention that as yes, we have welcomed a fair number of their children into our hallowed halls. Newt's children went to Ilvermorny since their mother was based in the States then, all in Thunderbird House. The Kowalski children could only apply to Hogwarts due to the laws in the States. Newt's big brother did get married in the end and his children were enrolled at Hogwarts. All in Hufflepuff. The magical Kowalskis all ended up in Gryffindor. The years are really rushing past. Most of the children have graduated or will do so within the next two years.
I have two requests from the Scamander twins for letters of references to apply for Auror training. They just want to follow in their father's footsteps. Sometimes I do get a bit wistful, thinking of the what-ifs. Would there be a grandnephew or niece in Hogwarts if things had gone differently for Abe and Aurelius? All the missed opportunities…
Sometimes I imagine setting up a home for Magical children without family who need a caring place to grow up safely before they are old enough for school, but it isn't the same without you playing house parent with me.
Yours sincerely
Albus Dumbledore
Author's Notes:
Yes, the next generation – Queenie and Jacob married in 1932. Their eldest could be in his twenties. Newt and Tina must have had at least one son for Luna Lovegood to marry great-grandson Roth Scamander in the early 21st century. I like to think that Theseus not only survived the war but found love and started a family as well. Happy endings Albus can twit Grindelwald with.