De la guérison = Healing

Mid April, 844

The air in the room was thick, dense with stress, laced with vexation. As Erwin and Hange sat in Shadis' office, settled in front of his daunting desk, the tension couldn't even be cut with the dangerous blades of their gear.

The Commander sat with his elbows planted firmly into the smooth, lacquered top of the wooden desk, chin resting against his fist as his gold-hued eyes scanned the papers in front of him. "So… Hange, I remember your briefing upon your return a week ago, but… let me get this straight, it wasn't just a Titan, it was an Abnormal Titan, and Cadet Kuchel took it out by herself at Castle…?"

Erwin's gaze flickered over to the brunette Section Leader, who sat up straighter in her seat. "C-Castle Avocet, sir. That was the decided upon name for the structure, but yes, and I wrote a detailed description of it in my report."

"Ah, I see now. Well, the existence of an Abnormal like that is concerning to say the least, but we know that it's killable, just like the rest, so we'll just make note of it." Shadis moved to straighten the papers before setting them aside on the corner of his desk. "Erwin, what is Cadet Kuchel's status?"

Adjusting himself in his chair, Erwin folded his hands in his lap, watching the way the candlelight flickered over the Commander's features. "Stable, wounds are healing well. She's currently recovering in the infirmary. I haven't been back to check on her since I brought her back from Hermina this morning."

"Good… I'll admit, Smith, she's a pain in my ass with that tongue of hers, but she and her son are something special." Shadis acquiesced, leaning back in his chair. "You two are dismissed. Erwin, have a report on the journey from Hermina back to base on my desk by noon tomorrow."

"Yes sir." Both Erwin and Hange arose from their seats, saluting before exiting the room. Neither of them liked being in the Commander's hot seats, though Erwin figured that he could handle it a bit better than Hange, since he'd been doing it for longer. His fellow Section Leader seemed to get nervous every time she was stuck in that chair.

Some ways down the torchlit corridor, Erwin spoke up, his baritone voice rumbling in his broad chest. "Castle Avocet, hm? That's a nice name, how did you come up with it?"

Hange adjusted her glasses, brushing some hair out of her eyes as they continued to stroll down the hallway. "Oh, I read it in this book about birds once… I wanted to name it something interesting, and I've always liked the way it sounds. I know it's silly…"

"I don't think it's silly at all. In fact, it's charming, Hange. Don't let others think that you're anything less than brilliant." His words were followed by a pat on Hange's shoulder, affirming his words to her with a confident yet reserved smile.

What he said was not a lie, not by a long shot. Ever since Hange had joined the Scouts a few years ago, she had shown so much promise. He knew that Shadis had found her annoying, with her crazed theories about Titans and begging to capture one for experiments. He was surprised that she hadn't asked for that any time recently, given that she had been promoted to Section Leader. Erwin knew that she had a lot of potential, and hell, perhaps one day she would be fit to be the Commander.

He was getting ahead of himself.

Hange brightened up at his words, and it put a bit of a spring into her step. "Thank you, Erwin, that means a lot to me."

"Don't mention it. Now, go get something to eat. I heard your stomach growling while we were sitting in there."

Erwin held in a laugh as he observed Hange's change in expression from gleeful to being utterly embarrassed. "N-No you didn't. See you, gonna… go get food."

The brunette was gone in a flurry, leaving him to head to the infirmary on his own.

Slipping his hands into his pockets, he listened to the sound of his footsteps echoing against the barren stone walls. Not many cadets were around right now, mostly being outside for training, which left him alone with his thoughts.

The situation had been a bit tricky back in Hermina. A bit after he and Levi had arrived to assess the situation, Hange was summoned back to base. The dark-haired cadet was quite hesitant about leaving his mother behind, but Erwin promised to look after her so that Levi could escort Hange back to the base.

Kuchel had mostly slept for the next week, trying to recoup as much energy as she could after such a traumatic bodily injury. He had helped her as best as he could, but those wounds had really zapped out every bit of energy from her. The poor woman could barely hobble to relieve herself on her own out of sheer exhaustion, and it tugged at his heart strings. It was strange, seeing someone that was normally so full of energy and drive be that drained.

However, some good news was that the noirette cadet was healing quite better than most would be at her age, and thus, a week after Levi and Hange had parted ways, Erwin was allowed to take his subordinate back to base.

It started off well enough, though halfway through the trip, she began to grow weak again. They had been rationing her salve until they got back to the Scout's Headquarters, and the recurring pain had begun to drain her once again. Erwin had never been one to complain about the time it took to travel throughout the mighty expanses of the Walls, but at that moment, he cursed the heavens that there wasn't a faster way.

The Section Leader's solution was to have her sit on his horse with him, her back to his chest and his arms snugly around her while he held the reins. Ranya rode next to his own stallion, seeming to eye her owner from time to time. It was amusing, as Kuchel had sworn up and down that Ranya despised her, though that didn't seem to be the case.

Kuchel was barely conscious for some of that time, but he didn't find any challenge in keeping her upright, nor in making sure that she wouldn't fall off altogether. In fact, he would never have admitted it, but Erwin actually enjoyed having her on the horse with him. She was so warm and petite, smelled like a home away from home, like the sunshine had planted itself within her soul and graced her with the scent of sunbeams and clean linens. Her coal-black hair never failed to brush against his chin or his nose, and he couldn't help but smile every time.

Such a feisty woman when she was awake, but when empty of energy and in need of aid, she was soft and sweet. Part of him wondered if she had ever accepted help from others before this, or if she had let herself get to the point of needing assistance at all.

It wouldn't have surprised him, given how stubborn Kuchel was, how independent she made herself out to be. After all, she had raised a son alone in the worst of circumstances, and helped him become a good young man.

Well, good probably wasn't the right term, but Levi had a heart, at least.

He was just a bit gruff.

Colloquially, a bit of an ass.

But nevertheless, he knew his right from wrong, and just wanted to keep his dear mother safe from harm. Erwin could respect that– if his own mother had still been alive, then he would have felt the same way.

Then came yesterday, when Erwin had arrived back on base with a sleepy cadet at hand. The tiny woman didn't even stir when he scooped her up and jumped off the horse, making a beeline to the infirmary. He knew that they would be ready for her arrival, as he had told Hange and Levi to inform the nurses ahead of time. Just as he'd planned, a few older women flocked around him, directing him about where to set her down, and telling him that he could come back to visit in the morning.

This morning, he hadn't gotten a single chance to come see her, and he felt like shit about it. Levi had mentioned to Erwin in the mess hall that he had visited her, and that she was doing much better, but the blond man wanted to see for himself, wanted her to know that he cared.

His strides were leisurely as he waltzed into the courtyard, passing over to the next building that housed the infirmary. The sun was blistering today, and it was only combatted by the gentle breeze that was wafting through the air and gently bristling the leaves upon the tree in the centre of the common area. It was where there laid a bed of flowers, right at the base, beautiful and hued violet, and he couldn't help but kneel to pluck a few, just for her.

Women like flowers, right? I'm sure she'll enjoy these… they remind me of her eyes.

Of course, Kuchel's eyes were the furthest thing from the colour purple, but that first night that he ever met her, the azure shade of the dim moonlight had made everything look different, including her grey-blue irises. He never grew tired of watching the expression that her eyes held, as they were truly a window to the soul of another, or so he believed.

Though, Erwin found it quite hard to read her, even at the best of times.

Being such a large man, a few female cadets eyed him strangely with the bundle of blooms in his grasp, careful not to crush them before he got to the infirmary. He didn't seem to care, and no looks from anyone would stop him from trying to bring a smile to Kuchel's face. He missed the way she lit up the room with a grin, and wanted to try to give her something to be happy about. Anything.

Entering the infirmary, he found it to be quiet, the light from outside leaking into the dusty windows speckled about by the beds. Many of the cots were empty, though some of the curtains were drawn around them for privacy. Which one was she in, he wondered?

A familiar nurse peered up at him from the desk by the door, looking as though he had interrupted her during some important paperwork. "Hello Section Leader Erwin, what brings you here?"

"Looking for Cadet Kuchel, miss. Which bed is she in?" His tone was polite, hoping that at least a proper tone could put the nurse at ease. The staff of the infirmary were far too overworked, and he wished sometimes that he could advocate for more regimental funds, so that they could be paid more for the shit they were put through.

"Oh, I think she's in that second one from the end. I just got in here a few minutes ago with the shift change, and it said that she was in that cot."

"Got it, thank you." Erwin didn't even notice himself brushing stray hairs back, nor the way he straightened himself up as he made his way over to the pulled curtain. He wondered if they had been treating her alright, if she was healing any better now that they were back at the base– being away from home wouldn't make it any easier.

But, then again, did Kuchel see this place as a home? He certainly hoped that she did.

With a deep breath to calm his nerves, Erwin peeled the curtain back, peeking his head around as he did so. "Kuchel? I-"

It nearly made his heart jump into his throat when he found the bed to be completely void of a familiar woman's form, the blankets only slightly mussed up to indicate that she had been there once before.

Where the hell could she have gone? Shit, that stubborn mule of a woman is going to rip open her stitches if she moves around too much on her own. Fuck.

Erwin carefully set the flowers upon the pillow before marching back to the nurse's desk. "She's not there, did you see where she went?"

The woman looked up at him with wide eyes, glancing from him to the empty bed across the large room before shaking her head. "I-I'm so sorry Section Leader Erwin, I could have sworn that she was there! They said she was when I came in. I just hadn't had the chance to check on her yet, and I figured that she was asleep."

"Thanks." Erwin's response was curt, because all of his brain power was going to figuring out where on base this tiny noirette could have possibly gone. Even worse, what if she wasn't on base at all, and had taken Ranya off to town? It didn't seem out of the question for her, since he had learned that Kuchel was quite self-driven to do as she pleased, when she pleased, but mostly to the benefit of others.

He spent a good hour running around the base, and only ended up finding her when he got to the training grounds behind the stables. It was the last place he checked, but damn it, he should have been smart enough to check there first.

Right before his eyes, that pesky little inky-haired cadet was sparring with none other than Miche. Damn it, Miche had been on the very expedition that Kuchel was injured on, why was he already training with her? Didn't he have a brain?

"Oi! Kuchel!" Erwin stomped over to the pair, and when Kuchel's gaze snapped to him, it allowed Miche to pull a quick move, one that ended with her slammed into the ground, making her sputter.

"Ow, fuck, you cheated!" She spat, hissing and clutching at her side as he stood above her, chuckling with his whole chest. It only served to irritate her, it seemed, because Erwin could see her gritting her teeth. "You saw I was being called for, ass."

"Hey now, if we were in a life or death situation, you wouldn't have an opponent giving you a break. Should have been on your toes, cadet~" Miche reached down, plucking Kuchel off the ground by the collar of her jacket as though she were a kitten, setting her on her feet. If Erwin hadn't been angry with Kuchel for putting strain on herself, he would have laughed at the expression on her face of sheer, utter embarrassment.

"D-Don't pick me up again." She huffed, straightening her jacket before looking up at Erwin. "You called for me?"

Something about the situation had him seizing her wrist, starting to pull her back towards the building that held the infirmary. "Kuchel you know damn well that you need to be resting. Why in the hell are you training?"

Kuchel was struggling to keep up with his stride length, so he slowed down, letting go of her wrist when she started to yank against his hold. "I was bored, and if I just sit around then I'm going to get rusty. What good would that do me?"

Irritation prickled at his skin, and he stopped in his tracks, turning to face her with his brows furrowed. "Did you forget what you went through?" He demanded. "You're going back right now. You haven't even been awake a day. Did you forget about your injuries? Do I need to tie you to your bed to keep you in place?"

Crossing her arms over her chest, Kuchel's eyes narrowed up at him, though he noticed the slightest wince that she was trying so hard to hide. "What are you, my mother? I'm not going to stagnate in that fucking bed."

Against his better judgement, Erwin reached to grasp her chin, lifting her gaze a touch more with his glower deepening and his tone taking on that commanding nature he used oh-so regularly. "So long as your well-being is my responsibility as your Squad Leader, you'll listen to the nurses." He paused before adding softly, "Won't you be a good girl for me? Just this once?"

Oh, the flush that crept upon her darling features had him wondering, had him pondering what was going on in that beautiful mind of hers. She stared up at him with astonishment in her eyes, gaze akin like a doe caught in the crosshairs of a hunting rifle. "I-I'd love to, but I can't sit around and expect others to take care of me. I never have and I don't plan on starting now, sir."

The flustered look on her face had his insides twisting with pent-up desire, which he promptly ignored. "Well, just this once, you're going to be a good girl and do as the nurses say. And if I have to tie you to the bed and sit by you until you're healed, then so be it. Those are your options, Kuchel."

"Y-You forget the option that I'm older than you and can kick your ass. You wouldn't dare pick me up and jostle my poor back would you?" She huffed, the flare of the sun shining upon her midnight hair as a bundle of clouds went on their merry way.

He took a step closer, daringly, grasp gentle but firm upon her chin. "Perhaps under normal conditions, but you wince in pain at the slightest twist of your back. You're in no condition to fight." He briefly paused for a spell, before moving his hand to comfortingly brush some hairs out of her argent eyes, noting how silky soft they always were. "Do this for me, Kuchel. Please. I almost lost you. Let me help."

She gulped at the touch on her hair, but lifted her hand to dismiss it, gently pushing his fingers away as her brows furrowed into a look of irritation. "You didn't almost lose me, everyone acts like I got my throat slit open. They're scratches, they're healing, I'm not a child. I know how to take care of myself, that's all I've ever done, so just let me do it, damn it. I don't need any help from anyone." She turned on her heel in the dusty dirt, turning her back to him to begin marching off somewhere else.

However, she didn't account for his quickness, and he grabbed at her wrist, and gritted his teeth as he steeled himself for giving in to his own emotions. Damn it all. "I care about you, Kuchel, don't you get that? You're one of the most important people in my life, and yes, I did almost lose you– you didn't see the gashes on your back like I did." The burly section leader instinctively took her hand in his, linking their fingers together and, for a brief moment, he felt something squeeze in his chest at the warmth that her palm pressed into his skin.

"Let me take care of you, Kuchel. Let me help." Let me in. "It won't kill you, I promise." He added in an attempt to appeal to her humorous side. Now more than ever they needed something to break the tension.

He could tell Kuchel's throat tightened as she stared him down, and he once again wished that he could read between the lines that hid in her irises, that he could find the key to her heart. "How am I that goddamn important to you? What have I done to deserve that title, huh? Don't fuck with me like that, don't toy with me, damn it!"

The petite ravenette's eyes misted with tears as she broke eye contact, her attention now focused upon their linked hands. "I-I don't deserve the care, o-other people are more sick, more injured... I'll be just fine."

"You didn't have to do anything, Kuchel. We don't ask for who we care about in life. It just happens." Erwin murmured, quietly enough that only the two of them could hear his words. "I wouldn't toy with you, you know that. And let me worry about the others, but I need to take care of you first. Out of everyone, your injuries are the most severe."

She looked up at him wearily, those tears still in her eyes, but she appeared distraught, not taking her hand out of his. "I-I don't want to go back to the infirmary. Almost everyone in this Corps thinks I'm old and useless, putting me to bed rest doesn't help my case. I have to train, I have to fight again, S-Section Leader, or I'll get left behind like I always do."

His free hand cupped her face, thumb brushing away a stray tear. "I don't think you're old and useless, Kuchel. If you don't want to go back to the infirmary, fine, but then stay in my office where I can help keep an eye on you, and I'll have a nurse assigned to take care of you while you recover. Do this for me, Kuchel. Just this once."

Both he and Kuchel had forgotten Miche nearby, and apparently his ears were as good as his nose, because he approached from the side, gently placing a large hand upon Kuchel's shoulder. "He's right, Kuchel, you need to rest. I was hesitant to train with you but I know better than to piss you off." He joked. "Just go take a nice, long rest. We'll have plenty of time to train later."

Hearing more affirmation seemed to push her to listen to Erwin, but at the same time, she seemed conflicted. "I-I... I don't know what I'd do in your office besides being a nuisance. I'll go back to the infirmary, sir."

Her agreement had relief flooding through him, shoulders visibly relaxing. "Whatever you're comfortable with, Kuchel, but you've never been a nuisance. Though, I will say I won't hesitate to tie you to the bed should you run away again." Though he smiles as he speaks, his words were of course meant to be a teasing warning.

"Well, if you tied me to your bed, I think you'd have a bigger concern than me. You'd have to worry about rumours, would you not?" She gently let go of his hand, and began to stroll back to the building. Erwin followed, but felt a bit of embarrassment when he heard Miche snickering behind him.

However, he didn't let it stop the smirk that he flashed her, falling in step beside her. "I've never been one to care about rumours, Kuchel. They tend to be spread by busybodies who have nothing better to do with their life."

The breeze began to slow in the midst of high noon, and in the April sunlight, Kuchel peeled off her brown jacket, slinging it over her arm as they continued on. "I suppose, but gossip can be quite volatile, you know."

He barely heard a word she said to him, his steps faltering as he caught a glimpse of dour scarlet out of the corner of his eye. Letting himself fall behind a touch, he could see clearly now that the pale blue fabric of her button up was caked in thick, red blood, and his gaze narrowed at the sight. "Damn it, you've opened up your wounds. This is what I was afraid of, shit."

Erwin was as gentle as he could be as he scooped her into his arms, picking up the pace of his steps. "This isn't good. You do realise that if your wounds keep reopening, you run the risk of infection?"

Kuchel, as he expected, tried to wiggle out of his grasp– stubborn woman, she was. "P-Put me down! I can walk, damn it! You're just getting my blood on you! And I don't get infections!"

Erwin didn't quite know what she meant by that, but he didn't relent. "You think I care about that? Stop wriggling, you're going to make it worse." Continuing into the courtyard of the base, he strode up the stairs and towards the infirmary, quite obviously on a mission to anyone that he passed ignoring the curious looks sent their way by the various Scouts they passed.

When they got inside, the nurse had him place her down on her feet, and she was quick to drag Kuchel behind a changing screen to strip all of the bloody and dirty clothes off her. It was not long before Kuchel was donned once again in a hospital gown, tied from the small of her back and downward, but with the top half open like before. She appeared completely agitated, ruminating in her feelings as the nurse guided her sit on a stool to try to clean the wounds once more.

Erwin stood nearby, leaning against the wall and watching as the cotton swabs absorbed her ruby-red blood that leaked down her back. It made his heart strain, seeing the wounds freshly split again. Even though she was turned away from the other two, he could tell that Kuchel was stiff, trying to hide her sounds of pain.

The nurse paused for a moment once the blood was cleaned up, a pale finger pointing at one of the long claw marks in Kuchel's flesh. "You know, Section Leader, don't be too hard on her. She's more healed than I expected at this stage. Only some spots opened back up, but it was enough to draw blood. The edges are scarring."

That had his mouth setting itself in a thin line. Despite the nurse's words, all he could think about was how the delicate skin had been damn near shredded to pieces. Any deeper and bone would have been visible, just like he had explained to Kuchel.

But then he registered what the nurse had said to him. "Already? Is that normal? It hasn't even been that long since the expedition."

"Well, by the time you arrived back on base, it had been three weeks since the incident, about. I'd say it's a bit faster than normal, yes, but I think Hermina is known for their salves. Juniper berries are good for that sort of thing." She murmurs. "My my, Miss Kuchel, your wounds are hot to the touch, you know that? It's like you're a steaming sauna!"

"I've noticed before." The tone took Erwin off guard, hearing the faintest signs of stress, of anxiety in her voice. Was she anxious about it healing all the way, or something else entirely?

Without thinking, he reached a hand to touch along the edge of one gash, and he pulled back in surprise just as quickly. Something kept him from questioning it, but his eyes narrowed in suspicion. The sight, as well the nurse's observations, triggered something in his mind, but Erwin was unsure of exactly what. But instead of calling attention to it, he backed off. "Well, as long as it's normal, then there's no need to worry. It's good to hear that Hermina was good to our Kuchel here."

The nurse took her time cleaning it up once more, and made sure no stitches needed to be redone before applying another salve. "Section Leader Smith, what would you like for me to do with Cadet Kuchel here? Given her history of running off now I'd say it's best for you to make the call if she stays in here or somewhere else on the base."

He glanced over at Kuchel before speaking. "I'm leaving that choice up to her. She says she'd prefer to stay in the infirmary, so I'm giving her the chance to hold up her end of the bargain."

The nurse ties up the back, and Kuchel keeps looking out the window, staring at the courtyard below. "I don't trust myself." She mumbles, oh-so-quietly, and sounded defeated. "If I stay in here I'll go insane."

"That's fair enough." He told her, searching around for a moment before finding a robe to cover her up with. As Kuchel stood up, Erwin came to her, gentle in his touches to help her slip the garment over herself. "There we go… now, we can stop by your room, pick up what you need, and then we'll decide where you stay. How does that sound?"

He only received a tacit nod of approval from the injured woman, and when he caught a glimpse of her expression, Erwin could sense something akin to shame on her face. While he was a bit upset that she couldn't listen to directions about staying put, he understood why, and wasn't angry with her. He just hoped that this poor woman wasn't feeling guilty about needing help.

The trip to her room was silent, only the sound of their footsteps echoing in the hallway. Her feet were clad in only socks, because she didn't care to wear her boots back to the room, so her footfalls were muted by the soft fabric, in comparison to the clicks of his soles against the stone floor. Once they got there, Erwin let her take her time gathering some little things, like her toothbrush, her hairbrush, and a few nightgowns. He watched how she mindlessly folded them up, placing them onto her bed in a neat pile. It almost brought a smile to his face, thinking about how she was so motherly without even realising it, even in the simplest of actions. "So, have you decided where you'd like to stay?"

Her hands faltered at his question, shoulders stiffening as she answered. "…You offered your room, and I wouldn't mind taking you up on it, if that's alright."

He was sure that she would have chosen to stay with Levi, or even with Hange, but she chose him? That surely had his heart feeling some kind of way, though it was beyond his vocabulary as to how to explain it.

"That's just fine, Kuchel, whatever you feel comfortable with. I did offer it, after all. You can take my bed, and I'll use my couch in the office section. It's comfortable enough, and I know a bed all to yourself is quite nice."

It made his heart swell when a smile played over her lips, and she turned a bit to face him. "You're probably afraid that if you slept next to me, you'd crush me if you rolled over~"

Ah, there was that sense of humour. Erwin swore that he would never get tired of it, or that darling grin of hers. This woman really had no idea what she did to him, did she?

Before he responded, Erwin went to set her brown jacket upon the dresser, but there was a bit of weight in the breast pocket that had him opening it up to peek at what was inside. "Hm, what is this? A book?"

Kuchel approached as he took it out of the pocket, and she had a curious look on her face as well. "Yes… I meant to show this to you, actually." Her dainty hand pulled it from his fingers, and she opened it to reveal the contents. What Erwin saw had his mind spinning, had him thinking at a thousand kilometres per second as she spoke meekly. "It was in the tower of Castle Avocet… and I realised that I didn't recognise any of these letters in here…" Her fingertip traced over the ink-soaked paper, brushing over the words in boxy letters. "Can you?"

…

Kuchel looked up at him as he stared at the pages that she presented to him, wondering what was going on in that enigmatic mind of his. He truly had a brain that she couldn't comprehend sometimes, that was for sure. The soft sunlight leaking in through the window of her room illuminated the deepest blues of his eyes as he gently plucked it from her hands, looking through the petite pages of unreadable script. "No, no I can't." He murmured, his gaze seemingly glued to the sight. "This… this is my proof."

The last words had her brow raising, even forgetting about her pain momentarily to try to decipher just what he was thinking about. "Proof?" She went to take the book back, but he pulled away, clearly not done looking at it. "Erwin, proof of what?"

The silence between them for a brief spell was deafening, her heartbeat thrumming in her ears as she peered up at him. For a brief moment, her chest tightened, afraid that his proof could have something to do with her background, her secrets. After all, he'd seen her wounds in their healing progression, he'd seen her fight– was he looking for proof that she was an Ackerman? He was so smart, he had to have known about the Royal Government's persecution, right?

Anxiety mounting, she grasped at his sleeve, tugging at it to get his attention. "Erwin, answer me."

"You once said that it was personal when you mentioned your grandfather, and you didn't want to talk about it anymore. This is personal for me." She unfurled her fingers from his jacket, watching him slip the book into his own breast pocket. "It's nothing bad, it's just personal. Okay?"

Her eyes were trained upon the Wings of Freedom that adorned that pocket, holding that book. "What do you think it is, Erwin? Could it be from the time before the Walls? When people were still fighting Titans with cannons?"

"No idea… but that's why I want to study it, and see what I can find out. Thank you for keeping it safe, Kuchel, it might be a step in the right direction for Humanity someday."

His words brought her some peace, and she retracted to gather up the few things she had set aside. "I'm ready, I think."

"Alright, then let's get you settled. If you need other things I'll have a nurse come in here and get them for you." His smile made her feel so warm, so safe and comfortable, and she didn't question it when he guided her out, hand gently pressed between her shoulder blades. It made her cheeks prickle with heat, but it brought her solace in her uncertainty. By now, she knew Erwin meant her no harm… at least, all of her mind's logic pointed to it, while her heart still bowed under the weight of anxiety.

Once they entered his office, Erwin shut the door, kindly taking her bundle of items from her. "Here, I'll take care of this. Let's get you settled in. I want you to get some rest now that you're all cleaned up– and if the wounds bleed a bit through the bandaging, don't fret. We can always change the sheets."

She could hardly keep up, following him when he took her by the hand and into his bedroom. Kuchel took a deep breath, engulfed by the scent of him that flooded the room, threatening to make her dizzy. Fuck, she needed to pull herself together, and here she was, about to sleep in his bed. This was going to be difficult. More than she would care to admit.

While he set her things on his dresser, she padded over to the bed, pressing her hand into the mattress. It almost made her gasp, feeling the difference between the bed of a Section Leader and that of a lowly cadet. Sure, a soldier's bed was better than anything that she could have gotten in the Underground, but Erwin's mattress felt like a cloud. Without thinking a second more, the woman smiled in delight, and moved to roll into the bed, burying her face into a pillow. Her hands grasped at the sides, allowing her to squish it a bit while she sighed in delight. A chuckle erupted from Erwin, and he moved to the side of the bed, gently reaching to brush some of her hair over her shoulder while she kept her face against the cushion. "Having fun there, cadet?"

Kuchel peeked at him a bit, a grin playing over her lips. "It's so nice. You're a lucky man. If I slept here every night I don't think I'd ever want to get up again…"

Rolling onto her side allowed him to sit beside her, and she pressed her cheek against the pillow while he rested his elbows on his knees, folding his hands a bit as he sat on the edge. "Not a lot of sleeping gets done here, if I'm being honest. I'm glad you'll be able to get some use out of it."

That had her sitting up, comfortingly touching his shoulder to get him to look her way. "Erwin… you need to sleep, you know. That isn't good for your health. You do so much work, you're going to wear yourself out one of these days."

Kuchel watched as a sad smile spread over his handsome features. "It's not that I don't want to… it's just that after seeing many people die on expeditions, you start to grow tired of going to sleep, and reliving those memories. I hope that someday I can learn to forget, but for now, I just sleep mostly in my chair."

That had her absent-mindedly rubbing a gentle circle into his shoulder with her thumb, trying her best to soothe in some way. "Well… I hope that soon you can get some rest. I don't mind if you climb in bed with me, either… I trust you not to do anything stupid. You know I'd have you on your ass in a second, anyway."

Erwin gave a mirthy laugh, standing up and grabbing the blanket that she'd tucked her feet under. "I'll keep that in mind." He then had Kuchel lie back, and tucked her in, making sure she had enough pillows to keep her cosy. The dark-haired woman felt like she was surely sleeping on a bed of feathers, and her eyes began feeling heavy as soon as the covers were pulled up to her chin. "Do you need anything, Kuchel?"

His voice was soft, warm, like warm butter on bread. She was hungry, perhaps, but that could wait. After the excitement of the day, she wanted sleep to overtake her, and damn, she was so grateful that she could sleep on her back once again. Sleeping on her stomach every day had been more than a pain in the ass.

"No, not at all, Erwin. Thank you. You're too kind to me…"

She could have sworn that she saw a blush on his face, but she tried to push aside those silly thoughts as he stood by the door, ready to close it. "I'm happy to be, Kuchel. Just get some rest, and if you need anything, let me know."

"Can do…" Her words were more delicate than a butterfly's kiss, and when the door clicked shut, she exhaled, releasing her worries and woes with it. He had left the window open just a touch, and the earthy smell of the warm spring day lulled her to sleep, along with the scent of the man she didn't realise she truly adored.

Hello lovelies, it's been a hot minute. I didn't mean for this to take so long, but I've just been honestly very tired and needed a break, especially because I've been stressed about school and my car breaking down. However my dad surprised me and said that he was going to buy me a new car for graduation, so I am blown away and excited! I've been looking at a Kia Seltos, but if you have recommendations, lmk. I know nothing about cars...

I'm also at a part in the story now where it's just hard to write, feels like a lull. I hope you all are enjoying it anyway!

Song Award goes to The Rumbling by SiM, and Akuma no Ko by Higuchi Ai. Akuma no Ko reminds me of Kuchel a lot...

S4 Pt 2 is so good, guys...