3 years ago
A beaten and battered Nikolai had finally made it to Pripyat. He was exhausted, his body screaming to stop, his limbs threatening to give out.
The trip had definitely taken more out of him than he thought. As of late, he had slept on dirt, with nothing resembling a home. The cold had done havoc to his body. He slowly walked to an apartment building. Climbing the stairs he walked into a room and barricaded it. He sat on what was left of the mattress. Even this old and clearly broken mattress was better than the hard ground. He plopped down after grabbing a bottle of vodka from his bag. He drank as much as he could.
The warm feeling it gave him... God, he missed it. Soon his body gave out and he passed out. His sleep was interrupted hours later by rustling downstairs. He jumped back onto his feet. He felt a bit better, an improvement. He looked out of the window and saw a problematic scene. He saw a group of Monolith soldiers outside. He grabbed his things and got ready to fight. He heard footsteps inside the building. He looked over the railing and saw a group of Monolith soldiers coming towards him.
He pulled the pin of a grenade and let it fall down. "Grenade!" One of them yelled but it was too late. The building shook from the explosion. Nikolai heard more screaming he looked out of the window and saw more Monolith soldiers coming out of the woodwork. He was severely outnumbered. He aimed and took shot taking some of them out.
They quickly caught on to where he was and started shooting, he ducked and ran back. He dropped another grenade down the stairs. He needed to find a way out. Going down the stairs was a death sentence. Fighting them? Well, he would run out of bullets at some point.
Yet he had no other choice. They would overrun his position and jumping off a 7 story building didn't sound appealing at all. Then he saw it. A whirligig. Behind the building. Maybe two meters away. He thought of maybe the most suicidal idea he ever had. He pulled out his bottle of vodka and took a swig. He threw it at the stairs and shot at it. The spark it created started a small fire.
His suicidal idea was throwing his gear down and trying to jump into the whirling. Whirligigs were gravitational anomalies. Anything that walked into one would slowly be lifted off the ground and then be lifted and spun at rapid speeds until it discharges. When it discharges it forcefully rips the creature into pieces.
In his calculations, the anomaly would maybe cancel his momentum and start lifting him up. When that happens he would pull himself out of it. "God this is beyond stupid!" He yelled. He ran off the roof. He felt his stomach sink as he saw the ground approach. Until... He didn't hit the ground. He did it!
"Oh fuck!" He was being lifted up. He grabbed onto a nearby branch and pulled with all his strength. He barely made it off but when he did he fell from the tree. "Ouch," he mumbled. He quickly grabbed his gear and started running. The smoke would cover his escape. He doubted Monolith would think someone was stupid enough to jump off the roof. He ran through a nearby apartment, his counter would periodically spike up depending on where he was.
Then he saw it... A green army jeep, one that seemed to have seen better days. It was parked next to some sort of monument. The area looked as if a war had happened. The vehicle was filled with bullets most of it was also charred.
And God the smell of death and burnt flesh... There were stripped down bodies all around the area. What the hell had happened!? He recognized the vehicle as the one people told him his father took into this area. Carefully he checked the faces of the bodies. They were now beginning to decompose which meant it had been a recent encounter, maybe three days? He felt hope, maybe... Just maybe his father was still alive... He kept checking the bodies until he arrived at a deformed charred body a dog tag adorning its neck. Nikolai slowly kneeled beside it and looked at the name.
"Mykhail Vasylenko" he muttered. One of his father squad mates... Still nobody that resembled his father's. Another thing he had noticed was the lack of mutants, the smell of the carcass should have brought every one of them out a mile around.
He was close, closer than he had ever been, maybe just maybe he would find his father alive. But the question still remained, how did he survive this long and why hadn't he communicated with the outside. Also, why had no one seen him, even deep in Monolith territory there would be the odd scavenger. He needed to get to the bottom of this. No matter the cost.
Present
.
Nikolai slowly woke up. It had been hell, he hated it all. The nightmares, the memories they all came flooding back. It had been two weeks since the mabeasts incident and life had returned to its monotony. Well for everyone except Nikolai.
He had gotten the almost liquified body out of the Exo much to the disgust of everyone. Cleaning it was beyond nightmares. He sorted out all his belongings and read the whole diary... For the sake of everyone in the mansion, he had only told Roswall about his findings.
They were... Alarming to say the least. It seems that as the zone became more unstable a gate opened of some sort. 'A gate to test the worthy' he wrote. According to the diary very few ever came back but those who did talk about a land of magic and strange creatures. One they thought the zone had created for them...
It seemed the gate opened deep in the sarcophagus away from the prying eyes of other factions...
They spoke of many outposts, their locations were not clear though. And it seemed this 'gate' would throw you into this world in random parts of it. So supplying these operations rested on the hands of these 'runners' who would supply the bases they found.
This bastard had been one of the runners which made sense considering the amount of weapons he was carrying. Everything from small firearms to higher caliber rifles, bullets, schematics, meds.
Roswall seemed rather surprised by the information Nikolai had provided him but nevertheless was appreciative and so he hired more men to protect his land.
A crudely drawn map of his domain had been sketched in a piece of paper with coordinates. Something that seemed pointless, unless monolith had more under their sleeve.
So Nikolai had another mission, he were to find these bases of operations and take them out. Which seemed simple enough if he played it smart, the woods were his forte after all.
The one detail he had left out... The one that shook him to the core was... 'Something, something came out of the gate. Something unholy... The creature didn't show interest in us and left into the dark of the night... Those eyes... That smile... God have mercy on whoever runs into it.'
That meant... Maybe that creature he fought came from here. He needed to research more... God, it was all so easy when it was just surviving.
He brushed off those thoughts and quickly got ready, he had to help set up the village's defenses. The schematics had been given to Gunther. With the help of Emilia, he translated the instructions. At the very least they would be able to construct crude pipe pistols which would hopefully not blow up in their hands.
The progress in the village had been going surprisingly well. With Roswall bringing more workers and giving Nikolai Carte Blanc meant he could mold it according to his vision.
And his vision was the Rostov of Lugnica. A fortress, a safe haven... The future... Nikolai had not sat down and processed it all... He was getting a bit twitchy. Back in the zone if he was overwhelmed he could just take a break and drink, gamble, and other menial stuff. Now he had no chance, he couldn't break he needed to keep his cool.
Emilia counted on him. With some help of Roswall, we made it seem Emilia had been the one to rescue the kids and kill the mabeasts much to her dismay. Then again Nikolai was not looking for the glory, he just wanted her to be happy and have a chance to prove those who discriminate her wrong.
His thoughts were broken when he heard his room's door open. It was Rem. Rem had been an interesting case in Nikolai's eyes. She had done a 180 on her attitude. She now seemed to want to help him out of caring rather than forced to.
In these two weeks, Nikolai had picked up on some curious quirks the girl had. She seemed to idolize her sister Ram. To a surprising level. The other was her... Well, lack of self-worth to put it bluntly. He knew something happened during her childhood. He knew her and Ram lost everything and that Ram had taken the worse of it losing her horn.
He had tried prodding a bit but seeing how awkward the situation began he pushed the thought aside. She would tell him at some point but at least for now, Nikolai thought some positive reinforcement could go a long way.
"Hello Rem, dazzling as always I see," he said grinning. The girl grew red as she handed him his breakfast. Eggs, toast, and a glass of water. They all seemed to think it was weird that with so many options he would always go for water.
"T-thanks Sir Nikolai," she said bowing down.
"Stop it with the Sir, I'm just Nikolai. I feel old when you call me sir" he said jokingly.
"Anyways, I'll be heading out soon, so please keep an eye on Emilia."
"About that..." She said.
"Lemme guess, she wants to come," Nikolai said, Rem just nodded as he sighed. He had spent less time than he would have liked with Emilia. And she seemed to be a bit down by the whole ordeal as much as she tried to hide.
Regardless he had his reasons to not let her go. Mostly because it was really hard labor. Cutting wood, digging ditches, and much more. He didn't want to subject her to that.
"Well... I'll talk with her about it" Nikolai said.
"May I go?" Rem asked surprising Nikolai.
"You want to come?" He asked. She fiddled her fingers as she looked to the ground.
"O-only if it isn't a problem," she said shyly.
"Sure, but if you want to come you'll need to help with the project. And let me tell you, it isn't pretty." He said chuckling.
"I don't mind" she quickly said.
"Very well, I'll call you when I'm ready," he said calmly.
Nikolai was ready, the Exo was like nothing he had experienced before. He felt unstoppable. Even if he was slower and less agile the strength that came with the suit was like no other.
He had made his own changes to the Exo, mainly ripping the Monolith insignia and painting it a dark green. He called Rem and they both headed to Emilia's studio. He really wasn't looking forward to this.
"So Rem told me you wanted to go," Nikolai said as he entered the room. Emilia was buried in her books as usual, did she even rest?
"Yes, I want to help," Emilia said.
"Thanks, but you don't need to worry. We are already doing the heavy lifting" Nikolai said.
"Still I want to help somehow," she said not budging an inch.
"You can help by becoming a good leader," he said.
"How can I be a good leader if I don't even know the people?" She asked, Nikolai, rubbed his forehead. There was no convincing that girl.
"Fine, get ready," he said relenting. Nikolai really needed a drink. But vodka was not abundant and he restrained himself so he wouldn't down the cigs in one go.
They all headed out, Nikolai gripping his Kalashnikov his Vitorez strapped to his back. On his side, his revolver and a sawed-off shotgun.
The walk was relatively quiet, quickly Rem and Emilia realized something was wrong with Nikolai. They had noticed that he had slowly changed. His bright personality was slowly dulling. He looked tense, tired, and angry. At who? They did not dare to guess.
"Lia, may I have a word with Nikolai in private?" Puck said materializing. Emilia looked hesitant but she saw that look in Puck's eyes. One that said he would try to get through to him.
"Okay... Rem, let's give them space." Emilia said relenting, they both picked up the pace as Nikolai kept quiet always keeping the same speed.
"What do you want?" Nikolai said. His voice showing no emotion.
"Okay, spit it out," Puck said.
"What?"
"You know what I'm talking about," Puck said landing on his helmet. "You aren't the same Nikolai as before. Something changed... What happened?"
"Let me guess Emilia put you up to this"
"No she didn't but she is worried about you. Everyone is..."
"Don't worry, it will pass. It always does..."
"What will pass?"
"These... Feelings..."
"What happened?"
"The ghosts of my past haunt me. The burden I carry is heavy. I look at my gun and think of ending it all but back out for the sake of those around me. I wonder why is it always me surviving. Why does it always have to be me pushing on?" His voice a bit strained. Nikolai had had enough. He thought he had put it all to rest and now it's back and even worse. And when as before he could just... Stay in bed and wallow in misery and drink till it passed now he couldn't.
"I can't imagine what you've gone through," Puck said softly.
"No one can... Look it will pass. I will be okay... Eventually." He said weakly.
"No"
"What do you mean no?"
"Today you're resting," Puck said, it didn't sound like a petition it sounded like an order.
"I can't-"
"Yes, you can! Look just tell the people what to do. After that get out of that tin can. You're taking the day off. Emilia needs you. She worries about you. Spend this time with her okay?"
"I don't have an option do I?" Nikolai asked sighting.
"Nope!" Puck said giggling. "There is also something else I wanted to ask..."
"What would that be?" Nikolai asked.
"Do you like Emilia?" He asked making Nikolia stop dead on his tracks. He quickly started walking as to not draw suspicion.
"What brings this up?"
"Don't play dumb mister! We may joke and all but Lia has taken a shine on you. You're the first person to treat her that well. You treat her as an equal and saved her. She may not understand it well herself but she likes you."
"Putting me on the spot are we now?" Nikolai asked jokingly giving him a faint smile.
"Well, it's my job as a parent to do it" Puck answered.
"If you want a straight answer then you won't get one. Don't get me wrong she's cute, nice beautiful, and much much more. I truly care about it but I can't..."
"Why is that?"
"Emotional baggage, I'm not ready for another relationship. I have problems hating myself and well, she... She deserves someone that isn't a bunch of problems."
"Wait another relationship?"
"I... Before this, I was with this girl... Tanya loved her more than my own life. She understood me, she cared about me. We went through thick and thin together..."
"What happened to her?"
"What happens to everyone, she died and I never got the chance to say goodbye."
"I'm sorry to hear..."
"Don't... It happened a while back... After her death, I felt rage and I was running away. Running away from the memories. Days had changed, I wasn't okay I felt I was going insane. Time passed yet I didn't feel it. And I had a cruel reminder. Your loved ones may die but the world doesn't stop spinning. Everything went on like normal. No matter who I lost the world kept going."
"I-"
"So I did what I did best. I took on jobs. The most dangerous ones. I took each one of them knowing I could die and hoping it would come. But it never did. I always lived... No matter what I was still there. That's how I developed the nickname 'deathwish Nikolai'. And now I'm here and now that I can come back-" Nikolai felt something grasp his heart. Cold enveloped him, he felt as if death itself caressed him. He felt a presence behind him. For the first time in a while, he felt absolute terror.
He jumped on the ground turning and shooting at whatever was behind him. But to his dismay, nothing was there. His vision blurred for a bit. He gasped for air. Quickly he took his helmet off and gasped. He felt the pounding in his ears.
"What happened!?" Emilia asked worriedly. Rem standing next to her, her flail in hand.
"God... I felt as if death itself was out for me" he said shaking. "What the fuck... What the fuck!?"
"Nikolai, you have to calm down! I don't know what happened but you reek of the witches scent" Puck said. Nikolai did not know what he meant and at this point, he didn't care.
So there he sat in the middle of the road wondering what had happened. And a grim realization came over him. He was cursed to roam, he would not die. Well at least stay dead.
For the first time in a while, Nikolai felt a familiar feeling. Absolute sorrow, he was helpless and now he had to march on. March on as he always had before.
And cut, sorry about the delay but... Depression hits like a truck and sometimes I can't manage it well. But yeah it's here! thanks for waiting! As always feedback is always welcomed. UltimateMetroMan out!