Her mom takes her time fixing breakfast, obviously holding off on the inevitable questions until the rest of the family joins them. She's happy to sit at the table with Holly in the meantime, she's in no hurry to talk since she has no idea what to say or how to explain anything.
When dad shuffles into the kitchen just as breakfast is ready her mom asks her to go see if Mike is up. She panics for a second when she swings his bedroom door open and finds the room empty. But when she lets herself think, she quickly realizes where he must be. Indeed she finds him in the basement, sitting on the couch looking forlornly over at a blanket fort.
"Hey. I've been up since 7, have you been down here all night?"
Mike just shrugs.
"This where she slept?" She asks, looking at the blanket fort.
"Yeah."
"No sign of her?"
Mike shakes his head.
"I'm sure she'll turn up. But come upstairs now, you gotta have breakfast. And we have to tell mom and dad… something, at least."
"Okay."
She thinks their mom shows great restraint by letting them all eat for a few minutes before she starts unleashing all the questions she must've kept pent up for a good while.
"Okay, so. We need you both to tell us just what you've been up to this week."
"Looking for Will and Barb," she answers.
"Okay. I'm so happy Will was found. And I'm so sorry about Barbara. But I still don't understand. Will was… dead. They found his body."
"It wasn't his body," Mike mumbles.
"Okay, well… alright, let's put a pin that for now. The important thing is he's safe. But then… this girl, Michael."
"Is she Russian?" Their dad suddenly asks, sternly.
"What? No!" Mike looks affronted and confused.
"She came from Hawkins Lab. They do horrible things there, illegal experiments on kids. Mike and his friends found her in the woods and helped her," she explains.
She figures there's no reason to lie more than they have to. And Mrs. Byers has already called out the Lab on tv, she'll gladly follow her lead in calling them out.
"This is unbelievable, an outrage…" their mom looks exasperated.
"Now, this is our government we're talking about. We have to trust them," dad tries.
"Oh come on, Ted!" Mom snaps a little at their father, to her surprise. Out of the corner of her eye she can see Mike looking up with interest after staring at his toast since he last spoke.
"What?"
"You saw those men who came into our house. That Dr. Brenner, I told you he gave me the creeps. And this wouldn't be the first time the government was up to… up to something!"
"He was a little strange, I'll admit. But I'm just saying, this government, now? It's not Nixon in the office anymore."
She's about to comment on Reagan but bites her tongue, figuring she shouldn't stir the pot unnecessarily right now.
"Well that's neither here nor there. After this week I'm not sure what to believe anymore. But Michael, I don't understand why you didn't tell us, why you hid her from us?"
"I was going to, but she didn't want me to tell anyone, she was scared that the bad men would find her. And they did come to the house, so she was right."
"That's why you left in such a hurry that day…"
Mike shrugs.
"And you," mom turns to her then. "Who slept in your room Friday night? And where did you sneak off on Saturday?"
Shit. In hindsight they probably should've taken the time to put away the sleeping bag, even if they were in a hurry.
"Jonathan. On the floor! Hence the sleeping bag."
"You had a boy in your room for the night?" Their dad asks, incredulous.
"Ted, please. We're not mad, honey. But why did he spend the night? And where did you go the next morning?" She can tell mom is taking care to tread lightly. Maybe she regrets their earlier blowout over Steve.
"We'd been looking for Will and Barb in the woods all day. He walked me home because… it was dark. And then um… he stayed because uh… just, neither of us wanted to be alone, okay? I was upset… about Barb, and he about Will. The next day we went out to continue looking for them."
"Okay… but why all the sneaking around?"
"Because… when I first told you about Barb you were more concerned about me being with Steve! And you didn't want me out after dark. I figured you wouldn't understand."
"Of course I understand I… I'm sorry honey. For how I reacted. I screwed up. I was just worried about you… gosh, how worried we've been now… so you were out looking all Saturday too?"
"Yeah. We… met up with Mrs. Byers and Chief Hopper," she decides to leave out the part about Jonathan getting arrested for fighting Steve in the alley. "They had been searching on their own. Mrs. Byers never believed Will was dead. And then we met up with Mike and his friends, when we realized they were out looking for Will too."
"And then Will was found. But not Barb…?" Their mom tentatively asks.
"She's gone," she quietly answers, looking away.
"Gone? You mean… you think…?"
She just shrugs, still looking away and trying her damndest not to cry. Thankfully their mom changes the topic then.
"And the school… what happened at the school?"
"The bad men tried to take El," Mike says.
"El?"
"Eleven. The girl I found."
"Her name was Eleven?"
"Yeah, or that's what the bad men from the Lab called her. We called her El for short."
"And they took her?"
"No."
"Then what happened?"
"They tried to take her. She saved us."
"Saved you?"
"From the bad men. They had guns."
"Oh my God," mom gasps. And even dad looks very concerned now.
"Then she just disappeared."
"Disappeared where?"
"I don't know."
"This is all a lot to take in… I still don't understand just what happened to Will…"
"You may have to ask Mrs. Byers, it was she and the Chief who found him," she tells her.
"Maybe I'll do that. Oh, I hope they're doing alright now after all."
She nods, a fleeting thought goes out to Jonathan. She wonders if he's slept at all, how he's feeling today, if he's been glued to Will's side the whole time or if he's gone back to his house to deal with the state they left it in.
"Where are all my DnD books?" Mike suddenly asks.
"What? Oh… those men who came, they took some of your things from the basement, said it was evidence, somehow," mom answers.
Mike looks dour but doesn't say anything. Mom takes a deep breath and continues.
"I just… I need you guys to know that we love you more than anything," their mom continues and reaches out, taking and holding a hand each of her and Mike in hers. "I'm so sorry for Barb, and for your… new friend, Mike. For everything you went through this week. But no more sneaking around. Please, can we just talk to each other?"
She looks to Mike, he looks to her. They both nod.
"Okay. I love you too," she reciprocates, Mike mumbles the same.
"Did the guys really find a superhero?" Will asks.
"Yeah, I guess they pretty much did," he chuckles.
Will woke up again and after assuring them he feels okay he's now started to ask questions like he's trying to sort out what really happened this week, and what he was told when he woke up the first time.
"Her name was Eleven. El. She's a very brave girl. She helped us find you," mom adds.
"I remember, she told me you were coming. Where is she now?"
"We're not sure. She disappeared."
"Oh."
"I'm sure she'll turn up," mom tries.
"Jonathan, can I ask you something?"
"Sure buddy, anything."
"Where were you?"
"Oh. I'm so sorry buddy, I was covering for Eric at work that night to pick up some extra money, I'm so sorry I wasn't there for you I would've done anything to-"
"No, I didn't mean it like… I was thinking, when I was in that place and every time I went to the house mom was there but not you. Where were you?"
"Oh, I was out looking for you. Trying to find you."
"All week by yourself?"
"No, um, Nancy was helping me. You know, Mike's sister. She uh… her friend Barb, disappeared too. So we teamed up."
"You and Nancy? Huh. Is Barb okay? I didn't see anyone else there."
"Oh… no she… she didn't make it."
"Oh. That's awful."
"Yeah."
"When you talk to Nancy can you tell her I'm sorry about Barb?"
"When I… uh, yeah."
"Just when you see her next time I mean. I didn't know you guys were… friends or whatever."
"Oh we're not… I mean… I'm not sure what…"
He can feel both his little brother and his mother look at him curiously when he struggles to define just what he and Nancy are. Acquaintances? Friends? Partners in monster hunting? More? Since Will came back he hasn't really had time to think about Nancy, he's been so focused on his brother.
But thinking of her now his mind is cast back to cool Nancy hitting a can on the first try, smart Nancy figuring out how the monster hunted, brave Nancy shooting the monster without hesitation. Cute Nancy smiling at him when he pointed out that her mom doesn't knock, funny Nancy ribbing him about being the weirdest part of her week. Caring Nancy holding ice to his face. And of course, when they kissed on the couch. Was it just a spur of the moment thing? It wasn't for him. But maybe it was for her? He wonders if she'll want anything to do with him after this week. Probably not, he assumes.
"Nancy's cool, I don't care what Mike says," Will shrugs. "Oh and Jonathan… about that night. Don't feel bad, if you had been there… I don't think there was anything you could've done. Even you. It all happened so fast."
His little brother's words makes him smile a little. Will is so incredibly selfless. He's just come back from the dead and he's worried about his cut hand and about his feelings.
"That's right, I told you," mom backs Will up. "You can't blame yourself. This is no one's fault but that damn Lab."
"You're right on that," Hopper's voice suddenly cuts in, making both he and his mom turn around.
Hopper's standing in the doorway, hat in hand, soft expression on his face.
"Where have you been?" His mom asks.
"I got held up. How you doing, kid?" Hopper comes into the room.
"Good," Will answers.
"That's good. You're strong, kid. Listen Joyce, can I talk to you outside for a minute?"
He stays with Will while their mom follows Hopper out.
"So what happened to the monster?" Will suddenly asks.
"Oh, uh… I'm not completely sure. We… Nancy and me, we tried to kill it. We hunted it in the woods."
"You hunted the monster? That's crazy!"
"Yeah, guess it was. But we had to. We gave it one final go, last night, so that mom and Hopper could get to you. We set a trap for it in our house and caught it. We set it on fire."
"You caught the monster and burnt it?!"
"Yeah. We thought we killed it but it disappeared. I'm not exactly sure what happened then but apparently it went to the school and Eleven, the superhero your friends found, she killed it. So it's gone, don't worry about it."
"Okay. I can't believe you guys fought the monster. That's so tough. I just ran."
"Hey hey, what are you talking about? You survived in that place for a week, the monster couldn't get to you. You're as tough as they come, Will."
"I'm not…"
"Yes you are. I wouldn't have been able to do what you did. Not even mom or the Chief could've, that's why we had to catch the monster, to give them a fighting chance. Seriously, I don't know how you managed in that place for a week. Nancy's much smarter and tougher than me and she almost died in there after just a few minutes."
"Nancy was in there?"
"Yeah, just a for a little bit. We got a bit separated in the woods and she found this weird… portal thing, in a tree and crawled through it. The monster almost got her, I just managed to pull her back through in time."
"Wow. Guess I missed a lot."
Mom and Hopper take their time coming back so he and Will start to read comic books and he plays the new mixtape. Will really seems to dig it. When they finally return Hopper beckons for him while mom sits with Will.
"How are you holding up kid?"
"I'm fine. What's up?"
"Agents picked me up, tried to blackball me. I think they're in panic mode over there, after the whole middle school thing. They can't keep this all quiet. But I told your mom, and I'm telling you too just in case: no more tv appearances. Don't talk to the press. It'll just be more noise around you guys then, I don't think that's what any of you need right now, especially Will."
"They're just going to get away with it?"
"I don't know what to tell you kid. We'll see how it plays out. I'm just saying, keep to yourselves, focus on your family. If you raise hell, hell will rain down on you."
"Hell in this case being our government?"
"Welcome to the real world, kid. Are you good for money by the way?"
"What?"
"With the state of your house, time off work, I mean. Here, take this," Hopper says and shoves some crumpled up dollar bills into his hand. "And don't worry about the hospital bills. I made a deal with them, if you guys just stay quiet from now, they'll foot the bill."
"We're not a charity case," he lets Hopper know and presses the bills back into his hand. "And why would we take their dirty money?"
"Kid, there's a difference between being proud and stupid. Don't be the latter. Take this. And let them pay for this, it's their fault. Look at it like settlement money without you having to go through the bother of suing them," Hopper insists and presses the bills into his hand again.
He sighs heavily and stares at Hopper for a moment.
"You're a good kid. Go be with your family now. I'm looking out for you."
After spending most of the day either bouncing against the walls in her room or laying in bed wallowing in grief she eventually has to abandon her own private domain when the walls feel like they're moving in closer. She resolves to go downstairs. She can hear that the tv is on and her father muttering something about "an outrage". Seems like he's coming around to mom's thinking at last. She finds her parents on the couch glued to the news. She halts in the doorway and tunes in.
"- can confirm that what transpired at Hawkins Middle School last night was a response to neutralize and retrieve an experimental project from Hawkins National Laboratory. Due to unforeseen security problems the project ended up at the school. The situation has been dealt with and we want to be clear that there is no, nor was there ever, threat to public safety of any kind related to this situation. No one was injured during the operation at the school, there was however some damage to the school. Our department is working with the school board to repair the damage as quickly as possible. Further the Department of Energy is launching a wide scale investigation into the practices at Hawkins National Laboratory to find out how this breach of security was possible. Until further notice the Department is taking full control of Hawkins National Laboratory and shutting down all research at the facility until the investigation is finished. Again we want to reiterate that at no point has there been a threat to public safety in Hawkins, this is merely a precaution and standard procedure. Thank you."
"That was Eugene Harrold with the Department of Energy, confirming earlier reports that the situation at Hawkins Middle School was to do with a problem at Hawkins National Laboratory-"
"Just unreal," mom mumbles.
"Hopefully the investigation will straighten things out," dad tries.
"Have they said anything else?" She asks.
"The governor says he's going to launch an investigation into state police. They say state troopers made errors, with Will," mom answers.
"Of course they did, kid's alive after all!" her dad exclaims in disbelief.
"I still don't- wait, there's Mike's principal," her mom cuts herself off and their focus returns to the tv.
"Joining us now is principal Russell Coleman from Hawkins Middle School. I understand you have an announcement regarding classes for Hawkins Middle?"
"Yes, thank you Ms. Kelly. Hawkins Middle School will be closed for repairs for some time but classes will go on, we ask all middle school students to instead report to Hawkins High School tomorrow morning. At 8 AM there will be an assembly in the gym where you'll find out where your classes will be held. I'd like to thank principal Fiona Williams of Hawkins High for graciously offering us space so that classes can continue."
"Well, good they have sorted that out at least," her mom says.
"Can I take the station wagon tomorrow so I can drive us?" She asks.
"Oh, sorry honey I need the car, I'm running errands tomorrow. But I can drop you off and pick you up?"
"Okay. I'll go tell Mike."
"Hey," she greets as she walks down the basement stairs.
"Hey," he answers from the couch. He's playing with his walkie and doesn't look up.
"They're having all the middle schoolers gather at the high school gym tomorrow at 8. Mom said she can drive us to school."
"Just my luck. Not even when they shoot up the school do they cancel classes."
Mike's dry wit makes her smile a little. For years he's occupied the basement with a weirdly territorial mindset. They really haven't spent a lot of time together the last few years. But after all that's happened now she feels connected to him again. If nothing else, misery loves company.
"Mind if I hang out here? I'm going crazy in my room."
He shrugs. She sits down next to him on the couch.
"What are you doing?"
"Trying to find El," he explains and keeps adjusting the dial on the walkie.
"No luck?"
"No."
"How long have you been trying?"
Another shrug. She assumes he means all day.
"How did that thing work anyway? She could find Will through the radio waves or?"
"Something like that I guess. She never did explain it really. I don't think she could, she didn't know many words."
"Right. What really happened at the school? She just vanished?"
"Yeah. After she turned the Demogorgon into a million little pieces. Then she was just gone. Into nothing."
"I'm sorry, Mike."
"She said goodbye. It's like she knew she'd…go away or die or whatever"
"Hey, I'm sure she's out there somewhere, come on. Just think about it. Apparently other dimensions are real, maybe she's here but somewhere else. If she'd… died she would've died here right?"
"I guess. I hope so. But still, she could be anywhere. All alone and scared. Or in danger. I know she's like a superhero but she's also just a girl. No offense, I didn't mean 'just a girl' like that, I just mean, like normal, like us too."
"I get it Mike. I know. But hey, if Will could survive in the Upside Down for a week, she can probably take care of herself, wherever she is. Because Will is just like us too. Or they're both special. I still don't understand how he managed to survive there for a whole week. I was just in there for a few minutes and would've died if it wasn't for Jonathan."
"What was it like, there?"
"Cold. Dark. Gross, like slime-y gross. Wouldn't recommend it."
"Didn't you ever stop to think before just crawling through that tree?"
"I wanted to find Barb."
"Right. Sorry. I'm sorry about her."
She just nods, looking away.
"Guess it was pretty brave. But pretty stupid too."
"Shut up."
"By the way, what really happened to your hand? And where did you guys go?"
"Back to Jonathan's house, to try and kill the monster. So Mrs. Byers and the Chief could get to Will. They'd be dead meat just walking in there. We cut our hands so the blood would draw it in. Then we trapped it and burned it. It went away. I guess we didn't kill it. Hurt it at least."
"You willingly drew the monster to you?"
"Yeah."
"Pretty brave and stupid that too. You should've seen what it did to the bad men when it got to the school."
"I can imagine."
They fall into a comfortable silence for a moment before Mike pipes up again.
"They took El's shirt too."
"Her shirt? Who did?"
"The bad men, when they stole my DnD books. They must have taken it too then because we left it here. It was a t-shirt from Benny's Burgers. It was way too big for her. It was all she was wearing the night we found her in the woods."
"She was wearing a Benny's Burgers t-shirt? Why?"
"She never said."
"Oh," she lets out when it dawns on her.
"What?"
"What if you weren't the first to find her?"
"What do you mean?"
"What if Benny found her first? She must've gotten that shirt from somewhere. And his diner is close to the woods. And if he did… I don't think he killed himself."
"What? Benny killed himself?"
"Yeah, didn't you hear? They say he shot himself. But if he found El first-"
"That's why she didn't want us to tell anybody about her," Mike interrupts her, already having reached the same conclusion as her. "When I told her we should tell mom about her so we could get help she didn't want us to and did this," he continues and mimes putting a gun to her head.
"Because Benny called for help and they shot him," she assumes.
Mike nods in agreement.
"But how did they find out about it?" She wonders.
"What do you mean?"
"It's not like he called them. If he found a lost little girl, Benny must've called like, child services or the police. But instead they showed up, they must've, it's the only logical explanation for him winding up dead and you finding El wearing a t-shirt from his restaurant."
"Yeah. Maybe they're spying on us?"
"They're listening to everyone's phone calls," she realizes. "The whole town. They must've heard Benny call someone about El. And heard me call the police about Barb, I told them that her car was still by Steve's. But when the cops interviewed me they said her car was gone. Someone moved it to the bus station."
"To cover their tracks."
"Yeah."
They fall into a silence then, processing. The government experiments on kids, let monsters loose, kill people and spy on them all. It makes her feel queasy, paranoid and very angry.
"School is going to be so weird tomorrow," Mike says after a while.
"Yeah. They said on the news that the middle school getting destroyed was about 'retrieving a project' from the Lab. Like she's not even human."
"I hate them. And what are we supposed to do now, just go on with our lives? Act like nothing happened?"
"I don't know. It'll be crazy, I mean with the school, and Will. And Eleven I guess… wait how many people know about her? I mean besides all of us and Benny."
"I don't know… well, Troy and James knows about her."
"Who?"
"Some assholes at school. I mean, they don't know everything but they know about El, they know she has powers."
"How?"
"Well… we snuck El into school, so she could try to find Will using Mr. Clarke's HeathKit radio. It was the day they had an assembly for Will so we had to go to that first. Troy and James were like, joking around during it. They've always had it out for us. I got mad and told Troy off but he didn't stop. I kind of snapped and pushed him down. He was going to beat me up but El used her powers to make him stop and pee himself in front of everyone."
"Pee himself?"
"Yeah, it was awesome, everyone laughed at him, he was super embarrassed. Anyway, El was subtle so no one found out about her then. But later… um, well we sort of had a… temporary falling out, in the party and Lucas left and then El left, I don't know where she went then. Dustin and I looked all over the woods for her but then Troy and James found us and we had to run but they caught us by the quarry. Troy had his flick knife and he grabbed Dustin and said he'd cut Dustin's teeth out if I didn't jump into the water."
"What?!"
"So I jumped."
"What?! Are you insane?! You'd die instantly if you'd jump into the quarry that's basic physics! Wait, how are you not dead?"
"El. She got there just in time and used her powers to catch me in mid air and put me back down on the ground. Then she broke Troy's arm and they ran off. We haven't seen them since. So they know she can do things with her mind but nothing else."
"Jesus Christ, Mike. You jumped off a cliff?!"
"He was going to cut Dustin."
"That's just… really brave and stupid."
"Well, takes one to know one."
"I guess. But never ever do that again you idiot."
"Same goes for you I think."
"I'm not planning on drawing any more monsters to me, Mike."
"Good to know."
"Wait, so El was on her own for what, a few hours? What did she do then?"
"I don't know, she never said."
"Huh. Wonder if anyone else saw her."
"Yeah."
"I wonder what people will say tomorrow. They have no idea what is really going on here. And we can't even begin to explain it."
"And everyone's gonna be talking about Will and El and what happened at the school."
"Yeah. Let them talk I guess. It's not what's important. Will is safe, that's what's important."
"And that El is out there somewhere."
"Yeah, that too."
And that Barb is dead and everyone thinks she just ran away, and that monsters are real and their government is heinously twisted and evil, she thinks but doesn't say. Not the time really. She leans back and burrows herself deep into the sofa cushions until she's half-laying down and stares up at the ceiling. Tries to think of something, anything else but Barb or monsters. But her mind keeps going back to last night in the Byers house. To the harrowing moments when she managed to stop the monster from killing Jonathan to how it then would've killed her instead if it wasn't for Jonathan. Jonathan. She tries to focus on Jonathan instead. He's been the sole brightspot of the worst week of her life.
She focuses on what else happened last night. It wasn't all harrowing moments of life threatening danger. It was also Jonathan kissing her in a way that gave her butterflies in her stomach. It's almost like she can still feel his lips against hers now that she thinks of it. It was so soft and tender but still urgent, how he kissed her. She kissed him back, she's really glad she kissed him back.
A lot can change in a week. Before last week she didn't think much of Jonathan. He was just the quiet boy in her grade, mostly notable to her as Will's big brother. She'd see him in class and at her house sometimes when he'd come to pick up Will. They'd say hi, maybe a tiny bit of small talk sometimes but that'd be it. He always kept to himself. She was aware of the rumors about him at school, some people saw him as a freak just because he was quiet and kept to himself. She never saw him as that, just from seeing how he'd be with Will had let her know long ago Jonathan Byers wasn't a freak he was just… different. Quiet, maybe to a weird degree, but not a freak, just a quiet guy who didn't seem to care what people thought of him but cared a whole lot about his little brother.
Glancing at Mike she thinks she's been foolish to have those priorities reversed since she started high school. She and Mike used to be closer but had been drifting apart for years. And she's cared a lot about what people think of her, especially at school. That's why it was so exhilarating when Steve started to flirt with her a few weeks ago. King Steve, star of the basketball team, older than her and the most popular guy in school.
After this week she's not sure she cares what people think of her anymore. At least not just anyone. Suddenly being popular in school feels utterly unimportant. Maybe Jonathan figured that out long ago, but for her it took this week to reach that conclusion. She thinks back to when she first saw Jonathan this week, when Steve had muttered "Well that's depressing" and looked at Jonathan putting up Will's missing poster. Carol and Tommy started to make cruel jokes and comments. They were all just gawking at Jonathan but she felt she had to say something to him. After all, given their brothers' connection she felt like there was some type of miniscule bond between them, like they knew each other even though they didn't really talk much. She hadn't cared what Carol and Tommy, or Steve for that matter, thought about her then. She'd just felt it was the right thing to do. She's glad she did. She was true to herself in that moment.
The photos had been weird. He invaded her privacy and crossed a line there. But in the grand scheme of things, she finds it surprisingly easy to let go of, because he apologized so genuinely to her, he looked so ashamed of himself in the darkroom. And he never overstepped again, instead he did things like having her back, saving her life and fighting a monster with her. Given everything he's been through she's willing to chalk the photos up to a momentary lapse in judgment. And in the end it was good in a way because he got the one of Barb that proved she was right, that there had been something there in the woods. It had motivated them to team up to kill it.
His read of her based on the photos, that he gave her in the woods on her insistence, was bullshit. Mostly, at least. He was kind of right that she wasn't true to herself, trying to fit in with Steve and his asshole friends that she never even liked. But at the same time Jonathan at that point didn't really know her either, she thinks. You can't really know a person just from observing them, she's sure. Now he knows her very well though, she thinks. Like she feels she knows him now. Spending days on end together, they had time to talk and really get to know each other. While hunting a monster and almost dying several times.
She learned Jonathan really wasn't creepy or pretentious, but incredibly brave, protective, smart and funny in his own way. That he's resourceful, willing and able to break into a locked car to get a gun, to go out and test her theories about the monster, to come with her to finish what they started. And pragmatic rather than prideful, immediately letting her have the gun when she turned out to be a better shot.
When he pulled her from the tree, when he bashed the monster away from her, those moments were monumental and showed her she could count on Jonathan to save her life. Just as important was how he took care of her after, how he got her home from the woods, comforted her in her bedroom and stayed with her. How he hugged her at the hospital when the realization that Barb is gone really hit her.
"I lied, before."
She tilts her head to the left to look at Mike.
"When?"
"When I said I didn't like Eleven. I do."
The only thing that stops her from blurting out a sarcastic "Duh" is the way Mike looks so vulnerable, like he confessed to a big secret not something that's frankly really obvious. Wait, is it possible she is just as obvious then? Last night she made him a deal they'd from now on tell each other everything. Maybe tonight is when they actually start with that.
"I know. I lied too. I guess I do kind of like Jonathan now," she admits to Mike and herself.
"Jonathan's cool," Mike nods. "Not like Steve. No offense, but he's a douchebag."
"None taken, you're… you're right about that," she concedes.
Steve. She's not thought of him since the alley fight. The secretary at the police station didn't really know what she was talking about. Jonathan didn't fight Steve for her, he fought him because of the absolutely horrible things Steve said about his family. Though she had tried to get him to just leave it so they could go and take care of more important things, she feels Jonathan was pretty much justified in landing every punch he did. What Steve said, the way he acted, disturbed her.
Some of his behavior had started to bother her in the days before that. He'd been so charming up until this week. He still was a lot of the time. But how he clearly came with one thing in mind for their "study session" and how she had to say no several times for him to stop didn't sit right with her. Thankfully he had, and then did help her study, but still. When they finally did it at his house it felt underwhelming. His wet jeans against her, her mind preoccupied by Barb's words ringing in her ear "This isn't you". And then it was all over quickly, and he just fell asleep, leaving her to walk home alone in the dark.
Next day he promised he didn't tell anybody but it sure felt like everybody knew, everybody was looking at her. Tommy and Carol sure knew, they made that clear at lunch, and Steve didn't shut them down. And then, the whole thing with Jonathan and his camera. Maybe Steve thought he was being protective of her, but that wasn't real protectiveness, not like Jonathan's protectiveness. She felt like Steve was posturing, trying to appear macho for her. She didn't like that. She didn't like that she didn't get a chance to deal with the private photo of her. Didn't like that Steve didn't listen to her, he didn't need to break Jonathan's camera. The way Steve talked, so sinister, disturbed her.
And then he blew off her worries about Barb, was only concerned with himself, that he might get in trouble for a goddamn party when Barb was missing. Yes, he apologized for it later, when he came to her house after Will's funeral. But she realized then that they were just markedly different people. Barb was missing and she was going to do anything to get her back. Her best friend was missing, she'd just gone to a fake (not that Steve knew that it was) funeral for Mike's best friend, and Steve's mind was at let's go see a movie. She supposes it was kind of sweet in a way, that he wanted to take her mind off of things like he said, but that's just not where she was at and she felt he'd never understand that.
Then there was nothing sweet about Steve after that. She still wonders what he saw. He must've peeked through her bedroom window, but when? And for how long was he there? He must've seen Jonathan sitting next to her on the bed, comforting her. Their backs were to the window then. So he saw Jonathan put a sweater over her shoulders and put a comforting hand on her back. Was that it? Did he see Jonathan put the sleeping bag out on the floor? When she came back into the room after her shower he wasn't by the window. And she didn't see him later, when she lay awake thinking of monsters.
It doesn't really matter what he saw. Nothing she and Jonathan could've possibly done that night would warrant and justify Steve's reaction. Spraypainting to the whole town that she's a slut. And then the alley. That disturbingly menacing voice again while he loomed over her, daring her to finish her sentence and telling her to go to hell. And then all the heinous things he said to Jonathan about Jonathan's family. Yeah, douchebag might be underselling what Steve is.
"So you'll be with Jonathan now?" Mike asks, catching her off guard.
"What? No. I don't know- we haven't… with everything going on that's not… important, right now," she tries to deflect it.
Yes they kissed and she cares about him and he about her, and thinking of him is the nicest thing she can do right now. But Barb is dead, the world is screwed up and he has to take care of his family.
"Why not? You should be if you like him. If El was still here I'd want to be with her," Mike tells her, voice cracking a little towards the end of the sentence and her heart aches for him.
Maybe he has a point there.
"I'm sorry about El, Mike. I just mean, it's complicated. With everything going on. They just got Will back, he needs to be with his family now. And we have to talk about things, just because we kissed doesn't mean he feels-" she cuts herself off when she realizes she just told Mike about kissing Jonathan. Weird thing to tell her little brother.
"You kissed him?" Mike sounds surprised, not grossed out like she expected him to.
"He kissed me- I mean we kissed-" she struggles to explain.
"I kissed El," Mike blurts out, interrupting her.
Her eyebrows shoots up at that. She's surprised both by the revelation and the fact that Mike tells her. On the whole telling each other everything from now on front, he might lead the way.
"Really?"
"Yeah. In the cafeteria. I was telling her how I thought she could come live with us after everything. I told her you could be like her sister. That we could go to the Snow Ball together."
Mike's voice cracks again when he confesses that and some tears start to flow. Her heart breaks for her little brother. She pulls him into her so his head rests on her shoulder and wraps her arm around him.
"It's okay, Mike. She's out there somewhere. We'll find her. You'll be able to take her to the Snow Ball. And I promise I'll try and be like a sister to her."