Warning: Past character death, signs of PTSD, blood, and minor injury
The sun slowly rises over the horizon letting its early rays of light peered through the window, warming Rin's back like a comforting embrace as she slept on her side. Slowly the Nohara stirred her slumber and blinked the sleep out of her eyes. She sluggishly raised to prepare for the day, she didn't want to, but Rin felt like she had to since today was that day.
Her heart felt like lead as she got out of bed and got in the shower. The hot stream of water from the showerhead softly pelt the top of her head, plastering her brown hair to her face, helping to melt the icy throbbing in her heart.
However, Rin could feel that deep sharp ache in heart intensity with the steam of the hot water, like the dull throb of a pinched nerve. Pressing her back to the cool wall, Rin slowly slid down the cool shower wall to the floor as she drew her knee to her chest.
'It hurts.'
The water pelting on her face felt heavy.
'Is this heaviness what he felt in his final moments before death?'
The high temperature of the water turned her bare, pale skin red as the discomfort of the heat started to turn to pain.
'Was it painful?'
The first thing she saw upon open her eyes was the bandages wrapped securely over Kakashi's left eye with a faded pink hue on the clean white gauze. Forming a line from his brow to his cheek with a round spot where his eye socket is located. He was paler than usual, making what visible skin he has appeared almost translucent. While she could make out the quickness of his breathing and the evident pain in his right eye.
'It's my fault. I should have been stronger.'
There was a man who appeared out of nowhere, right behind her. When she reached for one of her kunai, the world around her darkened. From the quick strike to the base of her neck. Only to regain consciousness from her genjutsu prison by her teammates. One had a faintly bloody bandage wrapped around his left eye, and the other with eyes that shined with the color of blood.
'I'm so sorry... Kakashi.'
The ringing sound of Rin's bedroom alarm pulled away from the dark, painful memories that plagued her mind from time to time. Rin shakes her head. Then slowly stood up and examined her angry red skin and turned down the water temperature as she continued her shower to stop herself from self-wallowing. Since she has places to be and people to care for, which are not her hospital patients for once.
The medic still remembers after the first few months of the destruction of Kannabi Bridge, Rin had enough. She was more self-critical, seeing the flaws and mistakes in everything she did. Always aware that it was her fault for her weaknesses that caused her to be captured. Made Obito's Sharingan activate. Unable to be there to heal Kakashi's eye after it was damaged. Not be able to move quick enough to pull Kakashi and Obito out of the way of the fallen rubble, and too weak to do anything but cry. The Nohara still recalls how she went to the only person who could help her become a strong kunoichi and an even better medical ninja, Princess Tsunade.
"Princess Tsunade, may I speak with you, please?" A young Rin asked, peeking her head into Senju Princess's hospital office. She was a little nervous but filled with determination.
"What is it, kid? I'm a little busy right now," the head medic replied, giving the young kunoichi at her door a brief look before focusing back on her paperwork.
Rin silently walks into the office and stood a respectable distance from the wooden desk the Slug Queen was working in. "I would like to be your apprentice," the young Nohara requested in a determined tone as her deep brown eyes remained on the sannin in front of her.
Tsunade looked up, giving the young kunoichi her full attention. The same young teen that has been attending Tsunade's medical lecture classes for a couple of years now. The Senju gave a thoughtful hum before answering with a question, "and why is that?"
Rin slowly tensed, not knowing what to say in those moments, as the words seem to stumble out of her mouth, as her tone remained firm. "Because... because... I have- no need to be strong."
"Is it because of the Kannabi Bridge mission?" Tsunade questioned, with honey brown eyes that held emotion that the Nohara could not fully interpret.
"Yes," Rin answered truthfully refusing, to lie to her role model and hopefully future master or second sensei.
"Why?" Tsunade questioned, raising a curious eyebrow.
"Because I was unable to protect myself from the enemy. Even if I was the greatest medic in the five elemental nations, it would mean nothing. If I cannot defend myself or the people around me," Rin explained, knowing it was her fault that the mission went so wrong. However, the young Nohara could see in those honey-brown eyes that Tsunade was not convinced. "Please. Please, I need to become stronger, to be better! I need your help, Lady Tsunade! To protect! To save! Please let me be your apprentice! please..." Rin added in desperation, hoping, praying that Tsunade will accept her as her apprentice.
"Alright. Tomorrow at noon, meet me here, and we'll see if you are worthy of being my apprentice," Tsunade replied, with a small smirk, after making a short, hummed sound.
Looking back at those memories now, Rin thinks that was one of the best decisions she had ever made. While looking at the bathroom mirror, the medic looked at the small, purple diamond seal mark on her forehead. It reminds her of how far she has come as a medic and a shinobi. Though there was still a part of her that feels empty. A quick shake of her head pulls her out of those painful thoughts, again. While she starts preparing for the rest of the day.
When getting near the third training ground, Rin spotted Obito, already standing in front of the memorial stone. Upon her approach, the Uchiha turned and greeted her with a wide smile that was obviously fake. The Nohara gave her precious friend a soft solemn grin, as she places a small boutique of flowers, she brought with her, in front of the memorial stone.
"Hello, Obito." Rin greeted, but couldn't bring herself to say 'good morning' today. Since, for her team, this was the day that they wished never happened. "You're here early," she added, knowing that Uchiha was suffering just as much as her and their Sensei. Maybe even more, since Obito's Sharingan was activated during the cave-in.
"Kushina volunteered to train the brats for today, and... I had some extra time on my hands," the Uchiha replied, rubbing the back of his head. Although, the first part of his excuse is true. Since Kushina loved sparing with his genin and teaching them fighting styles and pranks that they can use on him.
Rin said nothing but raised a disbelieving eyebrow in response.
"I couldn't sleep," Obito answered, with a sigh of defeat. This time being completely honest with his answer. Already, knowing it was better, to be honest with the Nohara medic than to lie and face her wrath.
Rin let out a soft hum sound, before asking, "Is it the nightmares, again?"
Obito gave a soft nod in return, not needed to tell Rin how he woke up this morning sweaty and shaking. Staring at his bedroom ceiling, searching for the cracks and falling rocks. The nightmares not as frequent as they were in the first few years after the Kannabi Bridge mission, but the detail of the dreams is still as vivid as the moment it happened. Thanks to his Sharingan being activated, and never let him forget.
Rin stood silently, already knowing what her Uchiha teammate was referring to. The nightmares were common. On their first few missions, Obito was unwilling to sleep and have an increasingly short temper. To where the Uchiha would almost become aggressive to everyone who slightly angered or annoyed him. It didn't help that Obito was in denial about Kakashi's death. Saying that was a lie and hated him for not being with them. That he wished he never knew Kakashi.
The Nohara's heart ached at the memory, but nothing hurt more than watching her best friend insulting the memory of their close friends. One of the good things that came out of their past relationship was that Rin convinced Obito to go to one of the Uchiha's therapy sessions with some assistance from the Yamanaka healers. It works wonders for the Uchiha, who was struggling with the guilt of how he treated Kakashi, and for being one, of the two to return from the mission. It didn't help that after returning from the mission, that team Minato learned how the ten-year-old, jonin was hiding from his team. The guilt was still there as it was for all of the members of Team Minato, but now he was able to accept Kakashi's death and try to move on with his life.
'I'm so sorry, Kakashi. I always was slow when it came to being a proper shinobi. I was never able to connect the dots in time to see how alone you were and how painful it must felt.' Obito thought, his chest swelling with guilt.
The Uchiha can perfectly remember the sickly pale face of the last Hatake as his eyes slightly narrow and curl. While a slight stretch of his mask indicated the smile hidden underneath. It was the first and last time Obito ever saw Kakashi smile, but his dark grey eyes hold so many emotions that he couldn't understand all of them. As time went on and the Uchiha gained more experience as a shinobi, he could decipher some of the emotions in those eyes: pain, sympathy, gratitude, and fear. The images of that day still haunt him, some days are worse than others, but it is getting easier. Now that he's got his genin team, Rin, Minato, and Kushina. Plus, the close members of his clan like his elderly grandmother, Fugaku, Mikoto, and Itachi and Shisui. Mindfully he knows that with a support group to like them, he'll be okay.
Another chakra suddenly appeared, making the two jonin turn to see the newcomer. Even though they both knew who it was before seeing the Fourth Hokage stand behind them. Minato looked at his two remaining students with the same haunted look lingers in all their eyes and the same dark under eyes.
Minato starred at the stone in front of him that carried one of the names of his precious students as he stands next to his two living students. The pain of loss still feels fresh even after all these years. However, Minato was and still is proud of his youngest student. Proud, but wished that there was another way for all of them to survive. Where the ten-year-old boy had to sacrifice his young life for his teammate.
The memory of that still lingers in the back of Minato's mind. After finally defeating the rest of the Stone shinobi at the front lines, the Yellow Flash immediately made his way to the rendezvous point. Where his three students were supposed to meet him. However, no one was there, and no sign of his students ever making it there. Fear weld itself deep into Minato's chest to the point where his heart hurt, and his stomach felt like lead as he rapidly rushes to the location of Kannabi Bridge.
The bridge was still standing strong, indicating that his students had yet to reach it, and that fear turned to horror. Quickly dropping his knee, pressing a hand to the ground extending his senses. Minato located Rin chakra close by, then Obito's chakra, but it felt slightly different. Minato tries to teleport to the kunai that he gave to Kakashi. But the seal wasn't responding, and he couldn't sense Kakashi's white chakra. Which made him worry more, but the little Hatake has always been knowing to suppress his chakra signature even when he was in the village. Minato followed his students' chakra signatures to a small clearing, with what looked like the destroyed remains of a cave structure. The Jonin-sensei couldn't sense any foreign chakras nearby besides his students in the collapsed cave. He found a decent-sized opening on the top of the ruined structure. Then slowly lowered himself to the cave floor, trying to prepare himself for the worst.
Once in the cavity of space surrounded by boulders of various sizes. While Minato spotted the forms of his two older students laying a few feet apart on their sides facing each other, unmoving. Carefully the Jonin-sensei placed the tips of his fingers on each of their necks. Only to release a heavy breath that he was subconsciously holding as he felt the steady beat of their pulses.
"Obito! Rin! Wake up!" Minato pleaded, rubbing their backs to help coax them awake. Instead of shaking them when there be possible hidden injuries.
Obito was the first to open his eye that is shockingly the color of blood, much to Minato's surprise. Before the Uchiha flung himself from the adult in front, sitting heavily on his knees, but arms posed for a fight. Minato looked at the Uchiha's nose just to be safe, as he slowly raises his hands with spread fingers in a non-threatening manner.
"Obito, it's me. Do you know who I am?" The Namikaze questioned softly in a calming matter as silent tears started streaming down the boy's dirty face.
"Sensei," the young Uchiha answered, as his expression showed recognition towards the Yellow Flash. While the tomoe of his Sharingan continued to slowly spin. His eyes shifted to Rin, who was starting to awaken as well. Then to the large pile of boulders behind him and frozen as if he was in a trance.
"Rin, are you hurt?" Minato asked in desperation when he saw Rin's teary eyes as she hisses in pain as she sat up. Her left arm wrapped around her midsection as her hand cradled her right ribs while staring at the large rocks behind her as well.
"What happened! Are you two alright?" Minato knows the answer but can't bring himself to believe it.
Realizing he wasn't going to get any verbal answers, Minato did a mystic palm jutsu to check on his two students. Although, he did not have enough control of the technique to actually properly heal any damage. He found that both Obito and Rin each have broken ribs on the side that they are holding. The Yellow Flash informed Obito that he needed to raise his shirt and jacket to see the damage. Minato felt the urge to throw up when Obito raised his shirt enough to show the injured, which Minato is certain that Rin's injury is the same. The same two or three broken ribs from the amount of concentrated chakra pressed on them and a bruise of a child-size handprint.
"These injuries," Minato muttered. 'It can't be, this can't be happening,' Minato inwardly pleaded, against all hope.
"Obito? Rin?" Minato asked slowly, voice calm, but his tone already had the voice of pain. Pushing past the lump in his throat Minato asked the question that needed to be asked, "where's Kakashi?"
The question snapped both genins out of their shocked state. Resulting in Obito screaming and cursing as tears drip from tightly closed eyes, as he punched the ground repeatedly in his rage of grief. While Rin motionlessly sat on her knee with a silent flood of tears streaming down her face. Before her silence became soft, grieving whimpers, to suppressed choked weeping, as her expression turned from disbelief to utter agony. Until Rin's heart-wrenching sobs echoed throughout the cave remains, along with the young Uchiha's enraged screams.
Minato sat there as a numbness filled his chest, coming to terms with the harsh reality that one of his precious students is gone. However, inwardly the Jonin-sensei knew that this was no place to mourn, that they were still in enemy territory and had a mission to complete. Taking another glance at the boulders that had taken his youngest student's life, Minato stretches his senses, hoping for beyond hope. What little white chakra that remained in the area was already starting to fade, but the Namikaze felt about twenty strong foreign chakras approaching their location.
Usually, this wouldn't bother Minato and could dispatch the enemy with ease. However, he's already spent half of his chakra at his battle against the Stone Shinobi. Then a bit more to teleport and find his students, his two remaining students, but he can't dwell on that right now. Minato mentally concluded that he only has about a fourth of his chakra left. Then quickly scanned the chakra signatures that were coming their way, and could tell that they were well trained, at least Jonin level. The Yellow Flash knew Obito, and Rin were in no condition to fight right now, and it would be unwise for him to fight all of them alone. However, with Kakashi's help- No. Focus.
Minato calculated that the enemy will reach this place in three minutes at least. That's not enough time to recover Kakashi's cor- body from the rubble, get to the Kannabi Bridge, set the explosives, destroy the bridge, and escape before the enemy's forces can reach them. The Namikaze let out a short growl, knowing what they should do and need to do. The destruction of the Kannabi Bridge will weaken the enemy's support and help bring this war to an end. But that would mean that they would have to leave Kakashi's cor- remains here, behind enemy lines, with no grave or stone to honor his sacrifice. Could he leave his youngest honorary son- Student! Behind like that? Yes, Minato could, and he will. To ensure Kakashi's sacrifice is not in vain. To honor his choice and strength by vowing that he will ensure that the rest of their team returns to the village safe and alive.
"Obito, Rin," Minato spoke firmly, capturing his two grieving students' attention. "We need to go, now."
"B-but," Obito stuttered out with wide eyes, shifting back and forth to his Sensei and the rocks.
"We must not let Kakashi's sacrifice be in vain," Minato replied with a sympathetic expression. Then added, "we have a mission, so let's complete it... for Kakashi."
"It should have been me," Obito muttered out, snapping Minato back to the present.
The Uchiha's head hung low, with narrow his dark eyes as his frown deepened. Thinking that if only he was fast enough to throw Kakashi out the way of that stupid, falling boulder. No, he let that idiot, Kakashi push him and Rin out of the way. The day he finally awakened his Sharingan. When he finally caught up and matched Kakashi's power and skill, it was the day he could only watch as the world around him slowed to a crawl. Watching as the last Hatake save him and Rin, and that smile. That stupid smile, softly stretching underneath the black mask, a mournful smile filled with relief. If only he could have moved fast enough to grab his prick of a teammate and pull him out of the way of the falling rocks.
"Obito, it wasn't your fault," Rin replied, knowing that it could have been any one of them to get crushed under those rocks.
"Both of you are not at fault for what happened," Minato added solemnly, joining the conversation before Obito could argue more. A short silence fell upon the team. Before Minato softly adds, "I should have been there to help."
"Minato-sensei, you were needed on the front lines," Rin replied, knowing that her Sensei blames himself for what happened. Then tried to reassure the Namikaze. Before he could argue, "you didn't have a choice."
"But it was his first mission as a jonin, and I knew it was too much for just the first mission," Minato retorted honestly. His narrow blue eyes looked at the Nohara medic with a pained expression.
The Namikaze knew that his student was assigned a mission that was above their level. He even mentioned his concerns to the Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi. The Namikaze remembered how he almost got the Third Hokage to assign Fugaku Uchiha to join the mission as a second jonin leader. Since Kushina is a jinūriki and is the village's last line defense. The Uchiha clan head and chef of the Leaf Police Force was one of the only jonin who could join the Kannabi Bridge mission. Fugaku could work well with Minato, keep his students in line, had the experience necessary to complete this mission, and has an impressive, completed mission history in stealth.
However, Danzo intervened, claiming that Fugaku's Sharingan would be more productive for the village if the Uchiha stayed within the village walls. As a last line of defense, and to keep the jinūriki in line. Minato remembered how his chakra flared dangerously for a moment when the Shimura insulted the love of his life. Sadly, after about an hour of debating and arguing between the three men, the Third Hokage agreed with Danzo. Keeping Fugaku in the village and the mission assigned to the members of Team Minato.
The Namikaze would be lying if he said he wasn't a little bitter with Hiruzen's choice but didn't blame the Third Hokage for Kakashi's death. No one could have predicted what was going to happen on that mission. Minato knew that if he was a bit faster, then maybe he could have arrived sooner to save his youngest student, who was like the son to him and Kushina. Obito may have been Kushina's favorite, but Kakashi held a special place in her heart, too. The female Uzumaki always tried to spoil the last Hatake and wasn't afraid to scold the boy when he started rule preaching. Her efforts finally paid off a couple of months before the Kannabi Bridge mission, when the ten-year-old Kakashi referred to Kushina as his big sister. Soon after that when Minato and Kushina went to the Third Hokage to make a request.
"I never told you both," Minato started gaining the attention of his to living students. The Namikaze his heartbroken tone was less pathetic than it felt, as he slowly continued, "but Kushina and I were planning on adopting Kakashi. We had the paperwork and everything ready. All Kakashi needed to do was sign the papers," Minato let out a humorless chuckle. To prevent his students from seeing his bottom lip quiver. He felt consumed by the guilt of his failure, as his heart being grounded into dust. While he continued staring at the craved stone at held so many names, but Minato couldn't bring himself to look away from the name KAKASHI HATAKE. Minato let out a slowly shaky breath and softly added, "but that never happened."
The heavy silence was carried by the late summer breeze, making the leaves on the still green trees sway gently on swinging branches. Minato almost jumped when Rin and Obito hugged him. They knew their Sensei had to be strong, for them, for Kushina and Naruto, and the whole village. However, here, they didn't have to be strong. They didn't have to a Medic, a Jonin-sensei, or even the Hokage. Here, they can three people grieving over the loss of a loved one. So, Minato pulled the two young adults he's watched grow since they were children closer to him and allowed his mask to crack as his arms tighten around them.
Hello Everyone! I hope you all are having a fantastic day! Apologies for the angst, but I want to show the different coping methods in team Minato. What do you think? Also, I wanted to show signs of PTSD and how it can be represented in different people. Sorry for any grammar errors and for being slow to update. Life has been a little busy, but I'm trying my best. Anyways, if you like the chapter, please leave a favorite and a comment letting me what you thought about the chapter. Also, as a heads-up, the pacing of the story is going to start speeding up. And at times, it will be taking a darker turn. Don't worry, I will be leaving warnings at the beginning of the chapter, so you have some idea of what will be happening in the chapter. Thank you all so much for taking the time to read this chapter, and I hope you all are looking forward to the next update. Thanks again!