Douma didn't usually give the followers he ate a second thought once it had been established in his village that they were not coming back. It was also not the first time he had eaten the guardian of a child and most cases he just had the child move in with another adult as he had told Ko. Hotaka moved in with Miki and that should have been the end of it. Akemi and Ko were gone. These things happened; such was the danger of living in the mountains.

It had been three weeks and Hotaka was still going out into the woods to search for his brother. Leaving him to help in the fields inevitably led to him wandering off and Miki was at her wits end keeping track of him. Douma could do little to lighten the burden other than keep Hotaka at the temple, which he was reluctant to do all the time. Hotaka was poking everywhere. He was too naïve to suspect foul play, but he seemed to think Ko would just pop up one day in the temple since it had been the last place he'd been seen.

Douma had been sure he wasn't against the thought of eating Hotaka if he stumbled across his inner chambers. That was, until Hotaka got very close to his bedroom and he was faced with the possibility. He had shooed the boy away and, after a moment's deliberation, went into his room and sealed the door behind him, then began absorbing his collection of skulls.

(Absorbing years old bones, apparently, was not the same as absorbing fresh ones. Although he was successful in absorbing them, he felt ill for hours afterwards yet hadn't thrown them back up. It was fascinating.)

It was the right call. Hotaka snuck inside the following day.

"Hotaka," Douma said, carrying him out by the collar. "I've told you several times, you cannot go in there!"

"But Ko—"

"Ko isn't there," Douma said firmly. He put him down and turned him around to face him. "Ko's gone."

"He could come back!" Hotaka insisted just as firmly. "He leaves all the time! He works a lot!"

Douma sighed. That was the issue with eating humans, bone and all. There was nothing to leave behind for their loved ones. He straightened Hotaka's collar and put his hand on his shoulder.

"Hotaka, Ko's dead. I'm sorry, but he won't come back," he said.

"You don't know that! Maybe he's lost. Maybe someone took him! We should be looking for him. Why don't you help me look for him?"

"We've looked up and down the mountain. Everyone did. Akemi and Ko are nowhere to be found."

"You didn't!"

"I can't go out in the sunlight, Hotaka," Douma reminded. "The mountains are dangerous, especially with the past weather and we can't keep putting others in danger."

"I can—"

"We don't want you to get hurt either and neither would Ko! You need to stay home, where it's safe." Douma squeezed his shoulder. "Ko is dead."

"You—"

"Ah, Hotaka, again!" Miki cried, running out from around the corner. "Lord Douma, I apologize. He keeps slipping away. I hope he didn't bother you."

"It's quite alright, Miki," Douma said. He nudged Hotaka into her direction. "I understand it's an adjustment for everyone."

Douma crossed his arms as he watched them leave. Hopefully, that would be the end of it.

…It did not feel like the end of it.

For the rest of the day, Douma's thoughts kept going back to Hotaka's denial and grief. It would then turn towards Ko's death. He touched his chest, frowning. Ko was a part of him now, it's something he's always insisted about the ones he's chosen, and he did still feel that way, but it wasn't something others understood. They saw it as weird or insane or evil. Even other demons. He couldn't just tell Hotaka he ate his brother because he would think the same.

Douma wanted to do something; he just wasn't sure what. He knew he didn't want to eat Hotaka. There was still a lot the child could offer his village as he grew and it'd be a waste to devour him. It had been a waste to devour Ko, too. He felt like he should be… helping Hotaka. In a different way than he helped his other followers. Despite this, he also wanted to avoid Hotaka.

Being around while Hotaka was searching for his brother was…

Something.

Uncomfortable? Awkward?

He could do with a distraction.

So, he was very thankful when his senses picked up on Gyutaro and Ume going into conflict. He was less thankful when he realized they were challenging Lower One and he wouldn't be there for it. It was too late into the night to get to their battleground on his own in a single night (maybe he should try getting on Nakime's good side?) so he was forced to observe their fight in his mind's eye as he departed his village on foot.

He made it outside of Yoshiwara the following night where he knew the siblings would recuperate after their fight. Though from what he had been able to observe, they won without much difficulty. Their rate of improvement was astounding.

He noted that there was something a little different about the way Gyutaro held himself when Douma first appeared. Guarded, even though it was just Douma approaching and no one else. When he got closer, he could feel a trace of Muzan left behind in the area. He had just visited the siblings. An odd occurrence considering he had probably already met with them when changing their ranking the night before. Or had he stayed with them from the battle to Yoshiwara the whole time?

"Douma," Gyutaro said, 'Lower One' displayed clearly in his eyes.

"Congratulations, Gyutaro!" Douma said, spreading his arms. "Aaah, I'll need to challenge Upper Four as soon as I'm done here. You two are catching up so quickly! Where's Ume?"

"Why do you wanna know?" he snapped.

Douma lowered his arms, surprised at his tone. "I just wanted to say hello to her as well. Is she inside you? Do you take turns?"

Gyutaro didn't answer and was instead studying Douma. "Why are you here?" he asked.

"You're Lower One now! I wanted to congratulate you. I'm always looking for reasons to visit," Douma said. He shifted in place, curious of why Gyutaro was asking. It was obvious, wasn't it? He took in Gyutaro's expression. "Gyutaro, is something wrong? If this is a bad time, I can come back later."

Gyutaro's hand twitched, tempted to begin scratching. "I don't care what you do."

He felt like he did.

His next question was dangerous, and he wasn't sure what possessed him to ask him as there was nothing he could do with Gyutaro's answer.

"Did His Lordship hurt you?"

Gyutaro flinched back. Gaping at Douma as though he were insane. "Hell, Douma!"

"Did he?" Something hot and heavy and unfamiliar coiled in Douma's chest.

"Doesn't matter, do you have a death wish?"

"It's a simple question."

"No, he didn't, damn it," Gyutaro said. "Aside from the ranking change, nothing happened! I'm just…" He scratched at his head, drawing blood. "I was just pissed, alright? You caught me in a bad mood."

He wondered why Gyutaro was lying.

Gyutaro had taken Douma to one of the houses in the middle district of Yoshiwara. Ume was working on becoming a new Oiran so she was busy mingling with humans, leaving only Gyutaro for Douma to explain his situation to. It felt better telling someone, but Gyutaro only had one piece of advice.

"Just eat him," Gyutaro said a half hour later as he gnawed at the neck of one of Yoshiwara's many patrons.

"Suggesting that over and over isn't going to convince me to do that!" Douma said, puffing out his cheek. "I told Ko I wouldn't hurt him!" It had been a conditional assurance, but Douma was willing to waive it in favor of keeping Hotaka alive.

"What the hell do you want me to say? You're the one who keeps humans as pets and eats them when they're too happy. Or too sad. I don't fucking know, I lost track of how that works."

"They're not pets!"

"Not the point. You say he misses his brother, right?"

"Yes."

"His brother is dead."

"Yes."

"Because you ate him."

"…Yes."

Gyutaro threw his hands up. "Then eat him and they'll be together again!"

"No!"

"Do you want me to eat him for you?"

"That's worse!" But also really considerate? Douma was almost touched.

"How?"

"He doesn't know you!"

"Douma, you're a fucking lunatic. Just eat the damn kid."

"So mean, Gyutaro! Call Ume, maybe she'll know what to do."

"She'll just say the same thing. I don't know what the big deal is. It's not like you want to—" Gyutaro's eyebrows pushed together and he frowned. "Douma… I'm going to ask this once. You have to answer honestly."

Douma focused his eyes on Gyutaro. "Of course!"

"Do you feel bad about eating the kid?"

Douma hesitated.

"Douma."

"…No?"

"…You're an idiot," Gyutaro said, slumping.

"I don't feel bad about eating people! I don't feel good about eating people either! I've killed dozens of children! This isn't about that! I just want Hotaka to stop feeling awful because of what I did…"

"I swear your brain is broken. Do you hear yourself? Ever? Is that why you don't shut up?"

"That's the second time you've said that. My brain is fine, I can show it to you!"

Douma had his claws halfway embedded into his skull when Ume slid open the door. To his delight, she was wearing the pin he gave her in her hair, along with duplicates that he assumed she constructed with her flesh. He jumped to his feet.

"You look amazing, Ume," Douma cooed. He lifted a fold of one of the many layers of kimono she was wearing, rubbing the fabric between his bloodied fingers.

"Douma!" she snapped, pulling back and glaring at the smudges of blood.

"Oops! My apologies!" he said, slapping his hands together and bowing quickly.

She scowled and then boldly absorbed the blood he had left behind. Douma pretended not to notice that, straightening and keeping his eyes on her face.

"How does it feel to be Lower One?" Douma asked.

"We'll just get higher in the ranks from here," Ume said, looking at her claws disinterestedly. Her hair unraveled so that it was almost loose, just a few rainbow pins on display now and she shed most of the kimonos, letting them drop to the floor and kicking them away. She looked at Douma from the corner of her eye. "What are you again? Just Upper Five? You haven't gotten any stronger, have you?"

Gyutaro frowned and began scratching at his head again.

"Are you ok, Ume?" Douma asked. Was she trying to provoke him? It wouldn't work. "You're saying mean things."

Her hands went on her hips. "Our Master expects us to climb higher and improve ourselves to serve him. You're not even trying! It's weird that you're content to stay where you are."

"Just drop it, Ume," Gyutaro murmured.

She whirled around on him, jaw dropped. "But he said—"

He? Muzan?

"Drop it, alright?"

"What's going on?" Douma whined, keeping his voice lighthearted. "Are you two hiding something from me? It's alright if you are, it's just you're really bad at it and it makes me wanna know!"

"Yes," Gyutaro said.

Ume looked as though she was going to smack him.

"You are?" Douma asked. "What is it, what is it? Please tell me!"

"No."

"But it's made both of you upset! Maybe I can help?"

"We're fine," Gyutaro said. "It's just a misunderstanding. We got some bad information, alright?"

Ume was staring at Gyutaro now, eyes wide. "Are you sure, Gyutaro?"

"It's fine."

Ume eyed Douma, though her body seemed to have relaxed a little. Douma decided to let it go for now, but he'd keep an eye on how the siblings interacted with him the next time he visited.

"Why are you here, then, Douma?"

"He feels bad about eating some brat 'cause their sibling is crying and he's being really stupid about it," Gyutaro said.

Douma made a small noise of protest. "That's not why I came—Hey, I care that I killed Ko! I just don't feel bad—"

Gyutaro made a 'see?' gesture towards him as he looked at Ume.

"Just eat the sibling and then you don't have to look at their ugly crying face," Ume said, shrugging.

Mean! Rude! Awful siblings! Why did he think it was a good idea to talk to them about this?

"I can't eat him too, I promised," Douma explained.

Ume sneered. "Oh, you are being stupid about it."

"You feel bad, Douma," Gyutaro said. "I'd even say guilty."

Douma stared for a few moments, processing. He thinks he already knew that. Hearing someone else confirm his feelings really cemented it though.

He sat back down. "I can't afford to feel guilty. Not with the way I feed," he said softly. "I don't like this."

"What are you gonna do, stop eating kids?" Ume scoffed.

Douma considered this.

"No way," Gyutaro growled. "Are you kidding me?"

Douma cupped his chin as he thought. "Hm, well, it's not as though I go out of my way to eat them. And they don't carry as many nutrients as an adult… If Lord Akaza can go without eating women, I'm sure I can go without eating children."

"Akaza doesn't eat women? But they taste so much better than men," Ume said as Gyutaro held his face in his hands.

"I know, right? It's very personal though so don't ask about it."

"What are you going to do if you feel bad over killing another human? An adult? You gonna stop eating humans?" Gyutaro asked. He poked at Douma's chest. "You can't just starve yourself to avoid one negative feeling! Have you considered the demon slayers? You know they start out real young. What, are you going to ask their ages before killing them? What's the limit, huh?"

"But—"

"I know you get some weird kick out of pretending to be happy all the time but sometimes you gotta deal with the bad feelings when they come. Besides, not eating children wouldn't make you feel better over this anyway! That brat's brother is still dead because of you!"

Douma tried to speak but Gyutaro cut him off by poking him in the chest again.

"The reason you feel guilty is because you liked those two humans for whatever dumb reason you like humans. Your judgement is shit, but whatever, sometimes we can't help liking people we should want dead. Point is most normal people don't like hurting the ones they like." Gyutaro leaned back. "Good job on being normal for once. But you can't grow attached to your food. You can't be friends with humans, you're a demon. It'd never work out."

"So… what do I do?" Douma asked faintly. Normal. Huh.

"I still think you should eat him," Gyutaro said. "You killed his brother and there's nothing you can do about that now."

"You can turn him into a demon," Ume suggested, though her nose was wrinkled in disgust at the idea. "Then he won't remember his brother at all."

Douma scratched at his cheek. "Ah… that is something I can do but…" He let his eyes look at Gyutaro and Ume up and down. He had been friends with them when they were humans and they ended up demons. "That's very… life altering."

"He might remember too," Gyutaro said. "I remember some things from when we were human once and a while."

"I don't remember anything," Ume said.

"And I remember everything," Douma sighed. "The only humans I've ever turned were you two and it was to keep you from dying. Turning him into a demon when he's just grieving is… excessive. I should be able to help him while keeping him human."

He's dealt with plenty of grieving humans. He's given plenty of advice to them as well. To whole families when sometimes one member was grieving more than the others. He'd encountered misery of all kinds involving the loss of a loved one. Surely he could figure out how to handle Hotaka with that experience? But that could end up with Douma getting more personal with the child, which could end up with Hotaka coming across something he shouldn't.

But if Douma was extra, extra careful…

As though he could read his mind, Gyutaro sighed and shook his head.