Heeeeeeey guys, is anyone still reading this? Didja miss me? Aw, I missed you too! Sorry for being such a lazy ass and not uploading anything for a few months. But at last, your patience has paid off! Thanks for all the wonderful reviews and other alerts I've been getting in the meantime! And thanks for all the chapter name suggestions. I couldn't decide on one that I liked the most, so I threw in my favorites.

Disclaimer: I do not own L4D, or any brand names, except my characters.

The Survivor's Guide to Surviving the Infection

Chapter 5: E is for Everything

In the world of zombies, you need to keep an eye out for everything. Please observe the following for your safety:

One month after first infection

Emergency

Divine kicked the door of the drug store open, pleased that no alarms went off. Thank god, the power had gone out probably about a few weeks ago. No sign of any zombies either, that's a plus. She walked in, flipping her flashlight on, her companions close behind. She paused, straining to hear something besides Ryan's coughing. No sobbing, another good sign. Alright, they were set.

"Ine, why we here?" Zachary inquired, sniffing around the shelves of candy near the registers. Divine kept a close eye on him, wondering if he'd start tearing apart wrappers to eat the chocolate inside. Candy and his stomach didn't seem to agree with each other, but she wasn't in the mood to tell him off.

"Cause, baby, momma needs some uh…girly stuff. You just…do whatever, okay? Ryan, keep an eye on him"

"Yeah whatever" the Smoker responded, smashing in the cigarette cabinet window, proceeding to stuff his pockets with the tobacco filled packets. Nodding, Divine moved off through the aisles, reading the signs above for the products that she really, really needed. It was a miracle the boys hadn't jumped her yet…..But they were probably too busy keeping everything else off of her. Seriously, those mindless Commons could smell blood a mile away…the fuckers.

She grinned as she found the right aisle, walking along to find the packages of her savior. And the great debate began…tampons or pads? Well, pads obviously. She could at least wear one for a while before having to switch. Getting an infection from a blood-logged tampon was the last thing she really wanted. Her mind made up, Divine grabbed a bag of pads and headed off to the bathrooms.

It sucked to be a girl in the zombie apocalypse.

Evac

Divine stuck a new clip into her pistol, staring down at the dead, zombified soldier below her. They had finally found one, an evacuation center. But it was over-run, everyone dead or infected. Helicopters gone, save for a downed one lying just outside the perimeter. Everyone gone…no help…she was stuck here. Not that is was a bad thing…But…knowing that there was the chance would have been helpful. A hand landed on her shoulder and have it a tight squeeze.

"Hey girl, you okay?" Ryan asked, a look of concern on his face. Divine nodded, glancing up at him, blinking away budding tears. "Says you" he scoffed, and pulled her into a hug. She didn't resist, burying his face into his shirt, his arms wrapping around her tightly. "It'll be okay…you still got us, right?"

"I know I just…I don't fucking know. But thanks, man" she mumbled, starting to push him away. "Well, no use crying over spilled milk, right?" she continued on, pulling on a grin. Ryan looked down at her, concern still all over his face. She turned away from him, not wanting to worry the Infected anymore. It didn't matter anyway, she had a book to finish anyway.

"Ine! Over heeeere! I find yellow yummy thing!"

"…A Twinkie?"

"Think so!"

"Oh fuck yes!" Divine cried, running over to where Zachary was. It was amazing; the Hunter had found a whole box…of Hostess. Well, that made up for something!

Epiphany

Zachary stared at the roll of sticky-string-thing, holding up above his face, his damaged eyes. Sticky-string-thing was good, it kept his coverings together, better for leaping through the air. But he had a feeling about it….an odd feeling…but he couldn't figure out what it was. He needed to know…NOW!

The Hunter jumped up, crawling over to where Divine and Ryan were sitting around a small box of blue metal-holder-things. They were drinking some smelly thing from there, slumped against the wall, and looked tired.

"Ine, Iyan, what this?" he asked them, holding the sticky-string-thing up. Ryan's single eye closed, and his head titled back against the wall, groaning. Divine blinked a few times, scrunching her face up to stare at the thing.

"Uhhuhuhhh that's uh…uh uh….." she stumbled over words, taking a few moments to realize what it was. "Uh…ohhh…ohh I know it's…." Zachary perked up at the name, nodding enthusiastically.

Satisfied, the Hunter shoved the sticky-string-thing into his pocket, and made his way outside. Nose in the air, he sniffed for that one scent above all the others. Where was he….where was he…where…was…..FOUND HIM! Grinning, Zach took off, scaling the side of the building and dashing over the rooftops, intent on finding his target. It didn't take him long, his target was always nearby. This sitting on top of a small shelter thing, his legs dangling off the side. Zachary scrambled up, taking out the sticky-string-thing and dropping it on the other Hunter's stomach. His rival shot up in surprise, staring down at the thing.

"It called 'ducky tape'" Zachary said proudly, then bounded off the shelter and back to base.

"Holy fuck!" he heard his rival in green say.

Energy / Experiment

So getting drunk wasn't the best of ideas. Divine's massive hangover told to never do that again, ever! She was walking back to their makeshift hideout with Zachary, a case of energy drinks tucked under arm. Every step she took was murder on her head, but thankfully the store hadn't been too far away. Her Hunter walked along side on two legs this time, the day's groceries in his hands.

Ryan had stayed behind, the poor thing. Apparently, alcohol and being a Smoker didn't mix well, and now he was out for the count…for a while anyway. Divine frowned at the sight of them, taking out her pistol and shooting them down, the gun shots feeling like fireworks to her brain.

"I hate Mondays" she grumbled, not even sure what day it was, but hating it nonetheless. It took another couple commons, a new clip, and a massive headache to reach their base. Divine set the box down, Ryan moaning loudly nearby.

"Make it go away!" he wailed, burying his face in his tumor-ridden arms. She stuck her tongue out at him, ripped the box open, took a can out, and opened. Bad idea, the sound probably made things worse. Divine brought the can to the Smoker, holding it down to him.

"Drink" she ordered, holding it there until Ryan took it with his own tongue, and tipped it into his mouth. "Feel better?" she asked, walking back over to the box and pulling out a can for her, and tossing one to her Hunter.

Ten minutes later, Divine found that what pure sugar did to the Infected. She would have to write more about it later.

Apologies to my male readers about the first part...If you think about it, girl survivors must have a really shitty time in this situation. And it may seem short, but mass Role-Playing at the same time doesn't help. Review, favorite, all that jazz. Point out all mistakes I made, more apologies for them being there. I can't read my own stupid writing until hours later anyway.

Until Next Time~