After not sleeping well all night, some of it due to hunger, but truthfully, most of it due to the fact he couldn't stop thinking about the mess his life had become, Andrew showered and dressed, preparing to head back to the hospital. He and his parents had gotten into a routine of sorts the last few days. Thankfully, he had his own room. He would have almost camped out in the rental car than to have shared a room with his parents right now. But, for the last few mornings, they had all gotten up, no specific time set, and after collecting breakfast-sometimes together and sometimes apart-they had basically waited in the lobby sitting area for each other before heading off to check on Gammy. Thankfully, she was starting to improve, but it had been a long week.
Andrew stepped into the quiet hallway and looked down the hallway at the rest of the hotel rooms. He was almost surprised to not find Margaret sitting on the floor in front of his door. It was unnerving that she wasn't lurking; she had to be nearby. He stepped out, closed his door, and he checked for his wallet. He was hungry, famished honestly, and he knew he needed a good meal if he was going to tackle the day. He still wasn't sure what he wanted to do about Margaret. He never saw it coming, that she would follow him to Juneau to check on Gammy.
"Andrew," he winced as he heard his own name upon entering the hotel lobby area. It was a small lobby, but he certainly had tunnel vision this morning with his tasks at hand. Andrew paused and turned, definitely sure he didn't have the energy to deal with this right now. He found Margaret in the corner, waiting in a chair, and as he laid eyes on her, she stood, her arm outstretched.
"Hi, umm," she stammered before continuing, "I know you must be famished. I picked up some breakfast for you. I felt badly how things went last night and well," she swallowed hard and looked to the floor before mumbling, "I did eat your steak."
"Thanks," he said politely but without an expression in his voice. He accepted the take-out container and caught her eye. "I am able to get breakfast, though."
She nodded and finally raised her head to make eye contact, "I know. I also can guess you didn't sleep well and have a lot on your mind. I wanted to help; this trip was about seeing you, seeing your family, and helping. I haven't done a good job of any of that." She gestured toward her side where her luggage was packed and waiting, "I'll be heading home. I know I'm not welcome here, and that's fine. I am the one who messed up all of this." Andrew followed her gesture and saw her bags, packed and ready to go, sitting there. "Oh, and breakfast is a bagel. I know you like those, but I can't promise it will taste like a New York bagel."
He nodded, taking in all that she had said, "Thanks, ahh, yeah," he said with a shrug. "I'm surprised you know I like bagels."
She caught his eye and sighed slightly as she shook her head, "I do, you know, from that questionnaire we had to do on the plane the first trip to Alaska, and you are right; I should know more about you. Well, I'll leave you to it and be on my way." Andrew watched as she collected her things. He watched as she walked toward the door.
"Margaret," he called out to her. She turned, a hopeful look on her face. She exhaled loudly as she spoke.
"Okay, I was really hoping you wouldn't let me just leave, Andrew. We can't keep messing this up."
"Oh," he said with a confused look on his face as he gestured to the container in his hand, "I was just going to ask if you got cream cheese for the bagel?"
Margaret's face turned from a hopeful one to a totally shocked and alarmed one. She schooled her features quickly, trying to hide her embarrassment for her admission. She fumbled her words as she gestured wildly. Now her cheeks were red too, "Yes, of course I got you cream cheese. Goodbye, Andrew." With that, she turned and walked outside.
Andrew sighed and groaned even out loud. He looked around, almost wishing he could transport himself anywhere else. Why was this always so complicated? Why did this always seem to end with Margaret leaving Alaska while he still had so much to say? He'd thought he could work through all of this, but she'd called his bluff, so to speak. If he let her go now, he was bound to be miserable for the rest of his life because he knew this was his last effort to get her back.
Andrew put the bagel box on a side table and he walked quickly outside. He needed to catch her before she left for the airport. He felt a sense of déjà vu as he opened the front door. He looked to one side and then the other, knowing she couldn't have loaded things that quickly into a cab. He saw her walking-those heels and all-with her bag in tow. He started out with a light jog to catch up to her.
"Why are you walking?" Andrew asked as he came up beside her and matched her stride. "You know there are these things called cars that will transport you places. It's not even modern science, and yes, even in Alaska, we have those."
"Funny guy, hmm? What do you want?" Margaret asked.
Andrew turned so that he was facing her as he walked backwards, realizing as he did so that he hadn't thought this through very well. There could easily be a tripping hazard in his way.
"Why did you come back, I mean to New York?" Andrew asked, stuffing his hands into his pockets.
She gritted her teeth and spoke, although it was almost a mumble, "You know I had to get my job back."
"No," he shook his head. " I want the truth."
"Fine," she paused and threw up her hands, almost throwing her bag down in the process. "I wanted you back, Andrew. It took me that long, a year, to realize it."
"More like four years now," he said with a slight nod. "Why didn't you call?"
"I didn't know what to say!" Margaret said, now almost yelling as she was frantic. "I messed up! I never admit that. You should know what a step it is for me to say that. I did, though. I lost you. I'm miserable, despite what I want others to believe. I thought that coming back, I could see you in the same mood as me, and, and," she started to fumble her words. "I messed up."
Andrew stopped walking backwards, and with that, Margaret stopped moving forward. He locked eyes with her, "You can't just walk away, Margaret, when things get tough. You hurt me, over and over."
"I'm not trying to walk away," she started, and he nodded to her and also to her luggage. She looked down and gave him a sarcastic smirk. "Fine, maybe I am, but I don't know what to do. You don't want anything to do with me."
"I've messed up too," he admitted, dropping his head, but with his eye making contact with hers. He put his hands in his pocket, knowing his instinct was to reach for her. "For the record, I've not handled the last year well. I've been a mess. Seeing you brought back all of the hurt and the anger."
"So, where do we go from here?" Margaret bluntly asked, and she met his eye and almost willed him to look up at her.
Andrew, hands still in his pockets, looked to the ground and let out a long breath. He glanced up, almost surprised to see Margaret staring intently at him. He made eye contact with her and gave a small shrug as he pursed his lips.
"I really can't go back home right now, which is where we need to really sort things out, Margaret. I will say for the first time in well," he titled his head from side to side, "actually forever, we are both being honest."
"I don't want to lose you again, Andrew. I'm really not sure I can, not to mention that I'm not sure anyone else will put up with me," she said, the last part a mumble as she looked away. She heard Andrew chuckle lightly and glanced to him, a small smile appearing on her face as she did.
"Well, you've got that right," he said, "more honesty. No one will put up with you, Margaret. I suppose I'm a glutton for punishment."
For the first time, she looked to him with a hopeful expression, "Does that mean-"
He pulled his hands from his pockets, locked eyes with her, took a step forward, and he embraced her as the two finally kissed. Margaret threw her arms around him, something she'd never done. This kiss, unlike anything they'd had in Alaska previously, offered hope and promise. It felt right. Without saying anything, both seemed to understand that.
As the two pulled apart, their heads still touching, Andrew broke the tension, "We can't just kiss in Alaska, Margaret."
Margaret grinned at him, pulling him toward her again, and they repeated and then deepened their kiss. When they pulled apart, this time, she ran her hand through the back of his hair and looked him in the eye.
"I promise I will forever kiss you anywhere in the world, well," she tilted her head, "preferably not in Canada. I hated it there, totally miserable, and I'd really prefer not to go back."
Andrew hummed, as he settled his arms around her waist loosely, both uninterested in the people driving by or the fact they were on a gravel sidewalk in the middle of a side street.
"Really? You hated it that much," Andrew nodded. "Interesting. I kind of thought it had an appeal for a honeymoon destination."
Margaret's eyes widened and she gestured with her hand, which she had to move between their chests in the small space, "Honeymoon? Andrew, you don't have to marry me. I mean, I was deported, but I'm back in the United States legally. I thought we would see where things go. I mean, marriage…"
"Margaret," Andrew said, quietly, but in almost a firm tone as his eyes locked with hers again. He moved his hand from his waist to her cheek, "We have a lot of work to do, and we have a lot to sort and discuss, but considering the fact we have been absolutely miserable separately this last year, well," he nodded as his thumb rubbed her cheek, "let's just say I'm an old fashioned guy and don't see this ending any other way. If you aren't all in with this, you can continue your hike down this street in those ridiculous heels," he gestured to the ground.
Margaret scrunched up her nose and shrugged at him, "I do like my heels."
"Hmm, yes, but Alaska doesn't. They are definitely not practical. I thought you figured that out last time," he said quietly, brushing hair out of her eyes, both still talking but Margaret not completely answering his question.
She nodded and pursed her lips, "Yes, but that was in Sitka. This is in the state capital, a place where I assumed there was civilization."
"What are you talking about?" Andrew gestured around them. "This is civilization. Sitka has it too, just not those ridiculously expensive heels of yours, heels that cost more than a month of rent here."
She made a face at him, and the two shared a quiet moment and finally both started to laugh. She nodded, "Point taken. Heels don't belong in Alaska. I'll remember that next time." At that, she looked up at him, and he looked back at her, this time with an inquiring look on his face. She nodded and cleared her throat, "Marriage scares me, Andrew, but after the last year, not being married to you is even scarier."
"I know," he nodded, as he squeezed her shoulder, "but Margaret, it's you and me. No one else will put up with us. We owe it to society to take ourselves off the market and well, especially with your work reputation as a shark" he said with a smirk, "you get it."
Margaret dropped her head as she chuckled, "I am going to work on not being so scared."
"I am a scary individual," Andrew said with a nod and a wink to her. "Just wait until you see me in action with my baseball team."
"Oh gosh," she said, now covering her face. "You really do coach a kids' team?"
"Absolutely, and don't even think of wearing those heels to a game," he said, pulling her toward him to kiss her again. She returned the kiss, and the two pulled away, again with their heads together. "What time is your flight?"
"So, it's actually tonight, but I couldn't bring myself to be around you anymore, Andrew. It seemed like such a mistake coming here. You were so angry."
He nodded and met her eye contact, "I'm sorry."
"I am too," she told him. "Yes," she rolled her eyes, "I'm apologizing for my behavior the last couple of years. I've been terrible to you, leaving and even before that, how I treated you at work."
"Let's focus on the future, which right now means that I can't come home until Gammy is better," he told her.
Concern swept her face at the mention, "Gammy, oh Andrew, Gammy. I'm so sorry I made this all about us. Gammy is in the hospital, she's sick, she's-"
"Margaret," Andrew said quietly, almost shushing her as he rubbed his thumb on her shoulder, "she's going to be okay. She's old, obviously, but she's going to make it through this. I just need to stay for her, for my parents."
"Right," Margaret nodded. "Right, umm, do you want me to stay?" Margaret's face showed obvious concern, as if she'd completely forgotten the reason the two were standing on a side street in Alaska. He shook his head.
"Coming was the right thing, even if you ate my steak," he said, now giving her a small smile and a wink. She chuckled. "I never expected this outcome with everything, but we can work through everything, even the marriage talk," he said, pausing and making eye contact again. He only continued when she nodded in agreement, "when I get back to New York. I think it would be best if you let me stay here and deal with everything."
"Right, sure," she told him, nodding again and looking to her suitcase. "I guess I will head to the airport."
"You didn't answer," he nodded to her. "What time is your flight?"
"Oh," she said, with a small blush, "not until 10:30 tonight. It's a red-eye, but I couldn't stand being here any longer, causing you any more grief."
He pulled her tighter toward him and gave her a small smile, "So, you were calling my bluff?"
"No," she swatted at his chest, "I do have a flight tonight."
"Right, over 12 hours from now, so you were going to just sit there all day?" Andrew asked.
"Not like I'm going to go sightseeing," she told him and rolled her eyes as their gazes met. They both chuckled.
"Andrew," he heard, and both turned to see Grace up the street, coffees in hand. Both gave her a small wave, and even from a distance, they could see the huge smile on her face. Andrew glanced back to Margaret.
"I'm starving," he admitted. "Never did get that steak dinner," he said, and she groaned, putting her head into his chest as he said it. He nudged at her, and she looked to him. "Tell you what-being around my dad has still been challenging, and my mom won't stop telling me I'm depressed. Let's get some breakfast, like a real meal, with my parents. I will then personally take you to the airport and send them to go check on Gammy before I do."
She considered what he was offering, "You want me to eat with your parents?"
He nodded, "Oh, yeah, at this point, if I'm dealing with them, so are you. I'm going to plead the fifth on any questions from them and defer to you. I've had a year to hear their comments about us, about our relationship."
She pursed her lips, "Fair. Okay, fine. Are you sure you don't need to rush off to Gammy?"
He shook his head, "We all need to eat, and they can check on her."
"I can do that, and I'll be fine at the airport all day," she admitted. "I'll be fine," she repeated.
He reached for her hand, his other hand reaching around behind her to grab her bag, "I said I would take you to the airport, Margaret. I never said you'd be there all day." He winked at her and tugged at her as they started to walk back to the hotel.
"Andrew, Gammy," she said as they walked.
He nodded, "I will relieve my parents today, promise. We've missed a year, Margaret. We have plenty to discuss. Besides," he winked at her, "I know how much you love Alaska and crave this time to experience it."
"Let's focus on food, Andrew, food. I haven't had anything since that steak dinner last night," she said, nudging his shoulder. When he looked over at her, she stopped their movement, leaned up and kissed him. "I can't believe I fell for you."
"It is shocking," he said, nodding in agreement. "All I can say is the feeling is mutual, but if this is too much for you," he grinned, "I have Ramone's number right here, and maybe he's the guy for you." Andrew didn't wait for her to react. He winked and squeezed her hand before the two continued their walk back to the hotel.