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It was time to go. She couldn't deny it any longer. She was putting them in enough danger staying this long.

'I really have to go,' Chris whispered into Street's shoulder.

'Go?' Street pulled her back to look in her eyes, 'you don't even want to go.'

'I have to,' she moved trying to free her shoulders from his grip. She didn't try very hard and stayed where she was.

'You don't Chris. This is your life, it's been here waiting for you the whole time. Everyone wants you back. Stay; stay with me,' Chris had trouble swallowing.

'You don't understand, I can't stay.'

'You're right I don't understand.' He dropped her shoulders as he started to shout. It was more out frustration than anger, but that's not what Chris heard. 'You got up this morning, showered put on fresh clothes, and you put the handcuffs back on. What for if you're just going to leave now?' Chris froze. She should have known he would notice, but she didn't expect him to.

'I want to stay,' she finally admitted quietly to him, and herself.

'Well it's sorted then,' his voice was still coming out angry even though he was getting what he wanted.

'Street you don't understand I can't. I have to get back. I've already been gone too long.'

'What does he have on you?' It was the only thing Street could think of that would make Chris act this way.

'Stop,' she demanded, her voice so full of emotion Street couldn't work out whether she was almost shouting, or about to cry.

'No I won't stop. You belong here Chris. We can fix anything. We have the whole of SWAT behind us. We can fix this. You don't need to go back.'

'I do.'

'Why?' There was a long pause. Street was staring her down refusing to speak, but he'd given up on her answering his question. He was surprised when she did.

'Trust me,' she sounded defeated, 'you want me to go. You just don't know it yet.'

Street was furious. Why wouldn't she just give him a straight answer.

'Why can't you trust me?' He shouted, he could hear how crazy that sounded coming out in anger; but he meant it. She looked at him, her eyes searching his, as if giving his question some thought. 'Come on Chris. Whatever it is I'm here for you. You haven't even been you. I was here for you when you thought you were Jamie. I will always be here for you. I love you.' There, he'd said it, not how he wanted to, not how he'd imagined he would; but it was out, and there was no taking it back.

'I've killed people. Lots of people.' Chris ripped the bandaid off.

'Chris I knew that already. It's part of the job, I've killed people too. I know it's hard getting your memory back, but it's ok.'

Crap she'd done it, confessed her deepest secret to him, and it hadn't even occurred to him what she was trying to tell him.

'No.' She took a deep breath, 'for Benz.' Chris watched his expression changed as she knew it would. He took a step backward from her, placing some distance between them. She watched him as long as she could bear to. She could see the disgust as the puzzle pieces fell into place in his mind. The murderer of all the bodies they'd found over the last few months was stood right in front of him.

When she could bear it no longer she turned and fled to the bedroom, her bedroom. She stopped in the doorway. God this was her apartment, her things. How had it taken her this long to realise it? It distracted her for a moment from her devastation. She'd known Street wouldn't be able to forgive her for it all. She didn't deserve it. Yet she'd had this little glimmer of hope that he would have understood that she didn't remember anything. She never would have done it if she'd had all of her memories. The guilt was enough to deal with, she didn't want to see Street's reaction to it. Now she could never forget it.

She stood in the doorway to her room looking at it. Finally everything was falling into place. Her uncle and cousin helped her to move in. She felt Street come up behind her.

'This is my room,' she wasn't sure if she was talking to him. Only because as soon as she's finished her sentence she feared he wouldn't reply.

'You remember?' She turned to him but instead of looking at him she looked at the apartment.

'This is my apartment. We, you,' she looked a little flustered, 'we kissed here once.' Street couldn't help but smile at her.

'Twice actually,' her brow furrowed as she tried to remember the other time. 'After the second time you told me I was never allowed to step foot in this place ever again.' Street finished. From the look on her face it didn't look like Chris could remember that one.

'It's crazy,' she started, finally lifting her head to look at him, 'all that time I said we could never be together because of work. And now there's no work rules in the way and we can never be together anyway.' Her sad tone portrayed anything but craziness.

'What,' Street hadn't been expecting that. She'd only just admitted to being on the top of SWAT's most wanted list, and now she was admitting - out loud - that she'd always wanted to be with him. He didn't know which was more of a surprise to him.

He'd always suspected, or maybe rather hoped that's how she felt, but he never thought that she would be able to openly admit it to him. And he didn't want to think about the murder for hire. He'd been trying to count the bodies quickly in his head, and was worried it was close to fifty. He was going to have to make a decision, and soon, about where his allegiance lay. He had this horrible feeling he was about to lose one of the two things he loved, either Chris or his job.

'Street,' she broke him from his thoughts, 'Can I have a head start? Even just an hour?' She was making her way to the front door, the handcuff jingling from her wrist. 'Please,' she was trying to open the door as his mind was trying to catch up.

'Wait,' he sprinted for the door placing a palm on it. They were close to each other now.

'Please I have to do something before you turn me in. Let me do it and I will hand myself in.' He couldn't help the noise he made. He'd spent months chasing after Chris, so he couldn't believe that she was just going to hand herself in.

'What do you need to do?' She stayed quiet. 'Chris, come on. I'm not handing you in. Tell me what you need to do.'

'You're not handing me in?'

'Chris come on, you wouldn't have done any of it if I hadn't left you. It's my fault that they took you. Do you remember?' Chris shook her head.

'What are you on about?'

'Haven't you wondered how you went from Chris, SWAT officer to Jamie, Benz's accomplice,' Street couldn't bring himself to say hitman.

Out of all the things Chris thought about, this was something that hadn't occurred to her. Now it seemed ridiculous that she hadn't thought about it. She'd just accepted that one day it had changed, something had happened, she'd lost her memories and ended up with Benz. Still she had nothing to fill in that blank.

'What happened?' She asked after a while.

'Do you remember anything from that day?'

'I don't know what day you're on about.'

'We were out on a call, the whole squad. We were paired together, Hondo gave us an order and went off separate from the group. We'd done it so many times before I didn't think twice about it. We were ambushed. Bullets were flying everywhere. We were trying to make our way down a corridor. You were right beside me one minute and then you were down.' He paused remembering how scared he was to look down at his feet to see her, 'you were hit. I thought it was just one in the vest,' he pointed to the place in his own chest where he found the bullet in her vest. 'I dragged you up and down the corridor just in time before bullets started coming from behind us. The corridor, it was a dead end. We had nowhere to go but out of the window. I looked over to you to see if you had come round enough yet to make it out of the window; but you were slumped on the floor. I checked you. There was so much blood, I don't know how I missed it. I couldn't find a pulse and bullets were still flying.' He had tears in his eyes now. Chris closed the small gap between them and took his hand.

'It's ok.'

'No it's not. I left you. I thought you were dead and I left you.' A tear rolled down his face. Chris reached up and wiped it away with the pad of her thumb.

'It is ok. I'm so glad you are safe,' and there was his Chris stood in front of him. Looking at him with love and cupping his cheek. He couldn't stop the tears now.

'I thought you were dead,' he was nearly sobbing, letting all of his emotions go from the last few months. Chris pulled him down into a hug. His head going to her neck, her hand stroking his hair.

'I'm so sorry,' she whispered close to his ear. Street could do nothing but hold her tight, his arms wrapped around her leaving no space between them.