"Did you miss me?"

The entire team was in utter disbelief at his attitude. Had he expected them to fall about completely, to let the world end without him. They had rallied together, assumed the roles they needed to keep it all together, it had bonded them and simply, they'd grown up. They no longer followed their fearless leader to fight for the future, they were a synchronized, united team. And now the fearless leader was here to save the day again. Well, fuck that.

Jack watched from the side-lines as they handled everything at the hub without him. He'd expected the reaction from Gwen, she would always be the emotional one. The looks from the rest of the team were of betrayal, condemnation. Regaining their trust wouldn't be easy. The questions, where had he been, was he fixed, then...

Ianto. He'd been part of the team, alongside them in the field, a trusted and valued member. The confidence oozed out of him as Jack had watched him work. It was beautiful.

"Are you going back to him?" it was the first words he'd heard the Welshman say since his return.

Ianto had asked it without conscious awareness, as soon as it was out of his mouth, he cursed himself. What answer would even be the right one here – the confliction in him was palpable to Owen in particular, who winced.

"I came back from you" he looked towards Ianto as he spoke, then continued, "all of you"

Same old Jack then, all mixed messages and cool distance.

X-X-X

Having John Hart to deal with at least gave them something to focus on, allowing no room in Ianto's head for anything (or anyone) else. And then they ended up alone together in an office.

"How are you Ianto?"

"all the better for having you back, Sir" the answer came naturally, reverting back to collected distance as if there'd never been anything else. Ianto had practiced the mask of calm for as long as he could remember, long before Torchwood, long before he had any real need for it, and now it served him well. Or, well, it did, until….

"are you asking me out on a date?"

"interested?"

He spluttered in disbelief. What was happening. He's waltzed back into their lives, on to this planet even, and suddenly decided that was a good idea. Ianto had said yes out of sheer panic, and the look on Jack's face as he swept out the door was cheery but casual. What did this ridiculous man want from him.

X-X-X

"Now we have to avoid ourselves, great"

Ianto was on the phone immediately organising a hotel for everyone out of the city. He ordered 4 rooms, a fact not lost on any of the team in particular, Jack.

"Four?"

Ianto looked down, wanting to avoid this conversation so badly.

"Yeah I have somewhere I can go"

The tension was obvious to everyone, but Jack was completely oblivious,

"oh?"

Silence. After more than a few drinks in the weeks after Jack had left, Ianto had poured his heart out to the rest of the team. They knew something had been going on between them, but were as clueless as Ianto as to what it all meant. They had encouraged him out of his shell, to meet new people. And that's exactly what happened. They'd all met Jenny, having gone out for casual drinks with the pair. She was nice, funny, and most importantly, entirely normal. She was good for Ianto, gave him that link to the outside world that they all needed.

"Tell Jenny I said hello, love" Gwen said eventually, steering Jack into the back seat of the SUV before he could even comprehend what was happening. Ianto nodded at her before jumping into the other car with Owen.

"Drive, Owen"

Owen did he was told, "well fuck that was awkward"

"Shut up, Owen"

"Gwen will be filling him in now, I'm sure"

"Shut up, Owen"

"I mean not that its any of his business after…"

"Owen, I swear"

"Okay shutting up" he glanced over at the other man, "Are you ok?"

"Just…drive the car"

X-X-X

"So…he's met someone" it was a statement not a question.

Gwen sighed, "Yes. Her name's Jenny they met on a night out"

"Ianto doesn't go on nights out"

"You left Jack!" Gwen snapped, "You don't know anything about what he does"

Jack looked at her, apologies and regrets in his eyes. "I had to"

"So you keep saying" she leaned into the seat wearily, "but think about how it looked to us, how it looked to him!"

"I'm sorry" Jack whispered, "there's nothing else I can say"

"We know!" it came out more harshly than she intended, so she softened it with resting her hand over his, "but its not just that you left is it?"

"what do you mean?"

"You'd been messing with his head for months! He had no idea where he ever stood with you, then you kiss him in front of all of us and bugger off without a word"

Jack closed his eyes with a sigh.

Tosh piped up from the driver's seat. This was another new development, Jack thought, Tosh never drove the SUV if she could avoid it.

"He's doing good Jack" Tosh said, "He's come out of his shell so much, he goes out into the field and he's flourished there, honestly he's amazing out there. But more than that, he goes out, he leaves the hub and actually has a life outside of this" she laughed bitterly, "hell, he's up there with Gwen on the whole work life balance thing"

"So, what are you saying? Me leaving was what he needed?" Jack was getting tense

"Frankly yes" Tosh was blunt, "not at the beginning. That was…rough" she looked into the mirror to look him in the eye "You really did a number on him. But he healed, he got happy, he's met someone who actually cares about him and…she's so good for him, Jack"

He sat back in the seat and closed his eyes. How could he have got this so wrong.

X-X-X

Jack sat alone in the hotel room, reeling. He had to review the situation from Ianto's perspective. As far as Jack was concerned, they'd been exploring their connection. He was so casual because he had been in this position so many times, so many lifetimes even, that to commit himself to them all would be too painful, too impossible to comprehend.

Sex complicates everything. A one-night stand was different. He was good in bed, and he knew that. He knew exactly how to please any partner for one night, leave them with blown minds desperate for more. His own skill plus his 51st century pheromones was a toxic combination. But that wasn't what he wanted with Ianto. Of course, Jack wanted him, more than he had wanted anyone in a long time. He touched him and it was electricity, his nerves were on fire to the point of almost pain, and he wanted nothing more in those moments than to take him over and over again.

But more than his body, Jack wanted his soul. He had looked into those ice blue eyes, into that pain, and he wanted to heal it. He wanted his world to revolve around making this beautiful, broken man whole again, to see that spark he'd lost along the way to burn bright again. Seeing Ianto smile, seeing him laugh, on the rare occasions that happened, was like a breath of fresh air, and he wanted to be the reason for it. If he'd acted on this, they could have a relationship more intense than he'd had in so many years. And that scared the hell out of him.

So, he put up a wall. He could count on one hand the amount of meaningful conversations with Ianto, he'd kept the distance consciously. He'd put up a wall, which he'd occasionally weakened when he just had to let him in. When that happened, he would back away, reasoning that Ianto wasn't ready. The truth was neither was he. And now he'd gone and ruined it, sent him into someone else's arms. He lay back onto the bed with a sigh. In his own selfish arrogance he hadn't stopped to think how Ianto would take his actions, assumed he'd automatically understand what was going through his head.

"You idiot!" he groaned aloud at the empty room. Somewhere in Cardiff at this moment, Ianto Jones was alive, happy. Jack knew he should be happy at that fact, but all he could see was that he wasn't the reason why.