XXXIII

~ Havoc and I had reached the restaurant in good spirits. We were able to get on a topic to discuss and were putting it on pause as Havoc opened the door for me to enter. We both searched for Breda and Catalina. It was a pretty nice sit-down restaurant and the atmosphere it was giving off was high end. The lights were lit low giving a relaxing ambience. Thankfully Havoc was dressed down casually like me, so I didn't feel too out of place, but I was having second thoughts on him paying for my portion tonight.

Havoc found Breda and Catalina first and pointed in their direction, helping me locate them. A hostess nodded her head as he explained that we already had a table with friends, and we moved right along. We weaved around the other tables, approaching ours, with Breda and Catalina giving me an odd look as I waved hello to them. Breda stood up and offered a quick hug to me.

"What's with the look?" I asked as I leaned over the table for the hug, catching the disapproving glance Catalina gave Havoc. What did I walk into exactly?

"Sorry it's just…we weren't expecting you." Breda vaguely explained as we separated. I offered Catalina an acknowledging nod and she returned one to me with a warm smile. I took in that the table was set for four people, which perked my curiosity.

"Who were you expecting?" I asked and Havoc pulled my chair out for me to sit. I thanked him with a quick smile as I took my seat with him guiding the chair back in with me. I once again caught the look both Breda and Catalina were giving Havoc and it seemed like he was trying awfully hard to not notice.

"Have they mentioned what the special is tonight?" Havoc automatically brought the menu up to view, seeming to want to get off this topic. I shot him a suspicious glance and went back to examining the table. It was possible that the table was already set up to seat four people…however, my water glass was filled along with the other three.

"Never mind. We're glad you could join us." Breda jumped right along with Havoc and looked over his menu. Catalina continued to stare at me in a way that was starting to make me feel antsy.

"This is a nice place. Is it new?" I tried to start a new conversation, picking up my menu to attempt to hide from Catalina's stare.

"Sort of. I'd say, what…a year?" Havoc looked up swiftly to verify his estimation with the other two. They only nodded in unison, and I relaxed a bit seeing Catalina going over the menu. "It's been our go to spot for a few months now." Havoc explained more.

"Cool…so what's good here?" I browsed over the first two pages, nothing catching my eye.

"You could probably order anything, and it'll be good. So far we haven't had a bad dish here." Havoc offered.

"Except the sauerkraut." Breda chipped in, cringing dramatically. Havoc scoffed, entertained to have had the reminder. "I don't know what they did but it was the first sauerkraut that I didn't finish." Catalina nodded her head in agreement, seeming to remember the horror of the kraut. I wasn't much of a fan of it anyways. I decided to keep it simple and go for the schnitzel. We all ordered, and I decided to stick to my ice water while the others ordered something with alcohol.

"You pregnant or something?" Catalina bluntly said. To say I was surprised was an understatement. I wasn't the only one. Breda looked just as surprised and I'm almost certain Havoc stopped breathing while they waited for my reply.

"No." I lightly scoffed, rolling it off like it was a joke. "Just not in the mood to drink right now. Maybe later though." After I get a better idea what the bill will be.

We all started taking turns, going over updates and stories from the past four years. Breda and Catalina had started dating a little more than a year ago. I admit. I wasn't expecting the two of them to mix, but they seemed rather happy with each other.

"So, this guy takes me to this "secret" waterfall. Has this picnic spread ready for us, right, and feeds me…oh gosh. I don't remember what it was called, but my lord it was divine." I was in the middle of one of my adventures with Catalina, sipping on the red wine I finally ordered. All our plates were well cleaned and our bellies full of delicious food. Breda and Havoc had stepped away to pay for the bills and Catalina's interest in my story increased with every detail. "We're laying on the ground making out. His tongue is basically down my throat. Our hands…let just say that there wasn't a spot either of us didn't explore. There's little to the imagination at this point. I mean, considering we're buck ass naked and I'm on the edge, right?" Catalina nods enthusiastically to my rhetorical question and it almost made me laugh. "He pulls away just enough that our lips were still grazing one another, and he says…" My smiled turned into something of sin as this part resurfaced.

"What the hell are you two talking about?" Breda's voice behind me had me sitting up straight. My cheeks heating as Breda moved passed me to take his seat next to Catalina again. She sat back in her seat taking in a decent gulp from the remains of her wine, cheeks turning red as well.

"Nothing. Nothing of importance at least." I waved him off as Catalina and I shared a knowing look.

"Actually, I'm kinda curious." Havoc said, sitting in his seat beside me. If I wasn't red before, I certainly was now as my cheeks tingled from the blood rushing to them. I had to look away, taking a long drink of water in hopes to cool me down from embarrassment. Then again…we are supposed to be friends, and friends share these kinds of stories-No! No. I have never had any guy friends that I shared my sex life with. And I certainly wasn't about to start with my ex.

Thankfully, Catalina was able to change the topic by cursing under her breath. She adjusted herself in her seat uncomfortably. Her eyes set on something behind Havoc and I. Breda was more amused about what was behind us. I turned my head to look behind me to find what the dramatics were all about. I saw and recognized that girl Havoc was with the other night. Her bright brown eyes caught mine and she seemed just as confused as I was. Havoc turned around as well to look for himself, and I noticed he went still when he saw her, and I was on edge from anticipation to what was about to happen.

"Hey guys." The girl slowly approached our table, discreetly giving me a quick once over before addressing the rest of the table with a shy smile.

"Hey Annalise." Breda greeted her like he was having the time of his life.

"What brings you here?" Catalina asked, much more warmly than she greeted me, might I add.

"Oh well, I hadn't heard from Jean, so I figured he was stuck at work. Figured I would grab some dinner so…here I am." She explained.

"Oh shoot, we just paid our bill and were about to head out…otherwise we would-" Catalina fretted.

"No worries. I ordered it to go but I spotted you and figured I'd come say hi." She waved off Catalina's guilt.

"Perfect! You can sit while you wait and then we can all leave together." Catalina got up and pulled an unused chair from another table and placed it right between Havoc and her. I watched Havoc while the girl happily walked around the table to take her spot. I noted how she glided one of her hands over his shoulders as she walked behind him. Other than his jaw clenching, he seemed unphased.

"Sorry but…who's this?" The girl asked, looking to me once she got settled in her seat. Catalina looked to Havoc to answer.

"Right." Havoc laughed uncomfortably and blinked a few times as if he was pulled out of a dream. "Annalise, this is Colonel Abby Lovington, she's uh…well…uh…" He gestured to me while he fumbled.

"I'm just an old friend." I helped him out with as gentle of a smile that I could muster to her. I can't say it was a lie…not a direct one though, but something told me he didn't want her to know the true nature of our current rocky relationship.

"Right…yah. And this is Dr. Annalise Schuster. She helped me through rehab and everything." Havoc finished explaining their relationship. So not his girlfriend? Also, if she's a doctor, then she's clearly older than she looks. Jessica was wrong. Which wasn't much of a surprise.

There was a certain tension in the air that left me believing there was more to this Annalise than he was explaining. He said he didn't have a girlfriend…but maybe there's something between them? She looked at me like I was an enigma.

"Wait. Abby?" She whispered almost to herself, and her eyes lit up ominously. "Abby. The ex-girlfriend?" She put a lot of emphasis in the 'ex' part. Breda was hiding a laugh unsuccessfully and Catalina was slowly losing the battle along with him. Havoc didn't share their amusement and I admit, I was having a hard time seeing the humor as well.

"Right. Ex-girlfriend." I mimicked how she had said it. I downed the last bit of my wine, not needing any hints that this was the perfect time to excuse myself and escape back to my place.

"I've heard so much about you. It's nice to finally meet the person responsible for shattering Jean's heart." I swear the entire restaurant went quiet. Breda and Catalina even lost their laughter. Havoc had turned white as a ghost. It was possible his heart stopped. I know mine took a pretty good fall into my stomach. Who the hell was this girl?

I scoffed, unamused as I tried to continue to avoid the elephant in the room. Even though this is what tonight was supposed to be about. It's pretty clear now, that the two of us were still tiptoeing around the actual conversation we should have.

"Well on that pleasant note, I'm going to head back to my place." I tried to mask my guilt with a sweet smile. I pushed my chair to stand but Havoc turned to me promptly.

"I'll walk you home." The subtle desperation in his voice almost had me saying yes. Fortunately, I caught the surprised hurt from Annalise, and I knew I couldn't accept.

"No. Thank you but I can manage."

"It's not safe." I couldn't help but laugh at that.

"I don't think I'm going to get jumped and even if I do, I got that covered." I pulled out a pair of my gloves that I had shoved down my bra.

"I'd feel better if…"

"You don't need to worry." I cut him off, not wanting him to finish that sentiment. "All I have to do is slip these on when I'm outside, transmute a shock shield around me and I'll be the safest person in the city." I say that but I knew I wasn't going to. If someone was stupid enough to attack me, I'd use the opportunity to get out this pent-up energy.

"Still, it wouldn't hurt if-"

"Drop it, Havoc. You're not walking me back. End of discussion. Don't make me pull rank. I didn't make a name for myself just to come back to have you coddle me all over again." I pinched my lips together, realizing that I had said too much. I could see the questions in his eyes, but he didn't ask them.

"Is it weird if I admit that I missed this?" Breda pretended to whisper to Catalina, trying his best to release the tension in the air. Catalina smacked his arm with a disapproving glare, as Annalise threw a concerning glance to him. I rolled my eyes to his failed attempt and finally stood up from my seat.

"At least let me know that you made it back ok?" Havoc tried to negotiate.

"I've done just fine on my own for the last four years, Havoc. Nothing needs to change." I let my words resolve in me, hoping they did the same to him. He only looked down as he nodded his head. "Thanks for spotting me tonight. I'll be sure to get you back next time." I tried to smooth things over with him.

"You don't need to repay me. I told you it was a welcome home present." Home? No. This wasn't home. Not anymore. I destroyed any home I might have had here the moment I got on that train. Ignoring the pain in my heart, I turned to the girl.

"Dr. Schuster, it was a pleasure meeting you. Hope we can meet again." I wasn't entirely sure if I meant that, but I did know that I wasn't here to throw any ripples their way. I didn't say goodbye to anyone else and not giving anyone time to say anything, I turned on my heels and walked out.

Despite the fact that it was a sultry summer night, a chill ran through me as I felt the girl from 5 years ago creep into my chest. The girl who yearned for a man that was never supposed to be anything more than a colleague. A friend at most. It was like we were right back to square one. Any progress I thought I had made seemed to have evaporated within this one evening. I tried to shove that girl back down, not allowing myself to feel the waves of emotion that spread through me. To not yearn for him like I had always done.

It was best that the night went the way it did. I should have left long ago. I still needed to review Becker's and Koch's reports, along with a few more things that I ended up brining back with me. It was gonna be a long night. ~

End of Chapter 33!

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