caffeinated sleeping pill: Can we meet?

Houdini: Sure, do you want me to pick you up?

caffeinated sleeping pill: No need. Tomorrow? Usual spot in france?

Houdini: Alright.

Colonnello sat the take out bags on the table "I brought your favorites"

"Thanks." Leilani answers, slowly stepping closer "Aren't you mad?"

Honestly this thought had swirled around her head since she left the meeting. She didn't regret her actions but it didn't change the fact that Colonnnello was her friend. He was different and she still lied to him.

The rain turned around to face her, carefully looking at her again masqueraded self "I want to talk about that actually."

"So you're mad?"

He sighed "I want to talk about it. I want the truth, not hidden behind any jokes or bets. I want to know your reasoning before I decide."

She nodded "You want to sit?"

"Yeah."

Leilani curled herself together on the couch, her eyes following him as he sat down next to her but turned fully in her direction.

The rain sighed "Alright. From the beginning then?"

She sighed but nodded "Before I joined the Circus I actually already lived on the streets. Not in the forest but well in the city,"

A flicker crossed over his eyes but Leilani looked away, instead staring at the wall in front of her "I was 14 when I landed there. I wasn't tall. Plain and simple… I looked like and was a child, nothing more.

I lost my home and I was stranded in Romania. I didn't understand the language. I didn't even have change on me or more clothes than the one I was wearing… I wasn't even in a good state back then.

I had just seen one of my classmates murdered and… more happened" She bit on her lip, before shaking her head. She couldn't get stuck in the memories "I was injured as well. My arm was gaping open and my nerves were pretty fucked up and I… I was lost. I tried to find my way back home. I spent the first few days just searching for anyone who could help me. I tried to find a way back home. I did anything I could think of but…"

She again had to pause, it was painful to remember the first few days. It had been awful, more than just that. She had been so desperate, so out of it. Just scrambling to find any kind of way to get out of there, to get back.

"I realized at one point that… it was pointless. Still, I didn't give up. I kept on going. I had no way to get myself food until I started begging but I kept on moving… In hindsight that probably was the reason why nothing happened to me.

But… I saw the looks… and I understood what was going on. I was afraid and panicked and desperate and… I decided to masquerade. A grown man would work right? It would be safer than being me. I couldn't defend myself then either. It was just a bad time altogether.

I used my magic, my flames to make myself taller, to get rid of my hair length and even the parts of my body that could identify me. I messed up my voice, obviously… It was the reason why my hair and eye color turned as well. I had no real control over it after all. I had no clue what I was doing but I managed somehow.

Still, I was panicked. My face didn't help and that's when I started to use makeup. Believe me when I tell you I looked way worse back then. Just smeared on cheap, white foundation and purple to cover anything else. But it did do the trick.

I managed to fake it completely and then I got to the circus and I just figured that being an adult man would be better. That it would make sure that I could be safe.

Skull de Mort was born then."

She still didn't look up, even as she heard him move closer.

"Honestly at this point I didn't use my sky flames. They were pretty useless. Sure now I know how to use them… but then? They barely did anything besides pulling attention towards me. I didn't use them. And honestly? I still don't like them. I hate what they can do and even while there are better uses of them it still won't change how you achieve it."

"What happened with the arcobalenos then?" his voice was calm but with an edge she couldn't quite place.

"Well… at first I didn't trust them. I hated them even. There was no reason to reveal it and honestly? I planned to leave anyway. Where was the point?

I did find out about flames back then and what they meant and sky flames? Sky flames just were plain trouble.

Honestly what is one supposed to do if you either have the fate to get enslaved and brainwashed by a famiglia or die?

I guess I can thank the fact that I never revealed my true appearance to them to mask my primary flame. It was accidental luck. Nothing more or less."

Leilani sighed "And afterwards I just… couldn't get rid of my altercations. Honestly being a toddler was bad enough but… being a girl had brought problems. I just latched onto that and kept it up. I mean I had fully become Skull at that point

I never planned to actually keep it from you. Honestly I just… I got used to it. I was Skull and Skull was stuck in this body. There was no reason for me to be the one who deals with it and sky flames? I didn't like them. I still don't.

Yes, they helped me stay alive and I found different uses for them but… just what they stand for? I didn't like it. Not even in the slightest and I was weak. For so long I was just focused on getting away and not dealing with it.

It didn't matter either. Why would it have? I just abandoned it. I just abandoned being me as there was no place in the world that would accept me. I was safer in this state and this stayed for a long time."

She still didn't look at him "Colonnello… when I actually started to like you… it didn't matter anymore. I mean it. It was just a random thing that had no importance. I was still me when I was with you. I didn't try to pretend after the first few meetings… What did my appearance even matter? What did my gender matter? It didn't to me. It never mattered to me.

Yes, I used it to win against the arcobaleno but… I didn't do it to hurt you or anything, it just… I wanted to pull one over Reborn? It was impulsive but at this point? It doesn't matter anymore, does it? It's not like you all will start a mass hunt over it. That you will go around and try to get everyone to hunt me down.

Even without the wager… it didn't matter to me. Being like this has ensured my safety for so long in the end."

She was almost startled when she suddenly felt an arm around her shoulder, pulling her closer in an one armed hug. Her eyes immediately snapped up at him.

Colonnellos expression seemed fatigued but a small smile was on his lips "You thought sky flames were useless?"

"Yeah."

He chuckled "You're impossible. Why was I even surprised? You're a walking disaster Skull and after all these years? I don't think you ever actually thought something through."

"I'm not that bad."

"Yes you are… but I like that about you."

"You're not mad?"

"No… No, I'm actually not. I'm frustrated that all of this happened like it did. I'm not a fan of what happened to you and that you had the need to go that far but… well.. we are friends, right?"

"Yeah."

"And this means that I will have reign over the games we play for the next six months, that I have the ultimate excuse why I'm the one to pick our snacks and naturally am able to choose the movie we watch later."

Leilani couldn't help the smile that was creeping up "Deal."

"But… one question.. what do you mean with your nerves were fucked up?"

She coughed before looking away "Not really important."

"Skull?"

"really. It's okay."

"You're worrying me." his voice sharper and alertness rang through his body.

"I… don't have that many issues with it?"

"So you have issues."

"Just a tiny bit? But it's okay. it really is. I learned how to deal with it."

"...did you go to a doctor?"

"It's fine."

"Skull."

"It's taken care of. Really but there is nothing in this world that could reverse it."

"I don't like that answer, kora."

"But it is what it is."

"Skull. I want you to get it checked out. A sun healer can do much."

"Well… that's kinda the point… it's sunflame related." she almost sheepishly answered.

His gaze sharpened "What happened?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Skull."

"No."

"You can't be serious."

"I am."

"You… Skull."

"I promise to let someone look at it the next time I get a checkup?" she didn't really do checkups… but well. She wasn't lying then?

"I want you there now."

"And I don't want to."

"This is about your health."

"Well… you're already kinda forced to not chase after me… so…no?"

"You promise it's not serious?"

"It isn't. it really isn'T."

Colonnnello sighed. He really wished he could drag Skull right now to Reborn and Verde but… Skull even while she was a sky… she was a cloud in so many aspects that he had never even questioned it and… forcing a cloud always ended badly.

He didn't like this. not even a little but he sighed loudly as he pulled his friend closer "I'm gonna let it rest… for now."

"Thanks. You're the best."

He shook his head "I think right now I'm a bad friend."

"No, you're the best. The best in this world." she sheepishly grinned at him "So… we fine?"

"Yeah… yeah, Skull we are fine."

She grinned brighter before quickly hugging him completely "Thanks."

"Not for that… so do you wanna eat now? I brought french onion soup and treacle tart."

"You're the best!"

He couldn't help but chuckle softly "You know you tell me that way too often in comparison to what you usually say about yourself."

Leilani shrugged "Well… There is no reason to pretend around you, right? Especially not now."

"Yeah." he smiled softly "And don't worry about the whole sky harmony stuff… Even while you're only a secondary cloud. I know how flightly you are and uninterested in settling."

Leilani stayed silent as he already stood up to get their food to the couch.

Colonnello barely heard her, her head tilted to look down and her voice more of a whisper than anything as she spoke

"I wouldn't mind it if it's you."

He immediately froze on the spot "Kora?"

"I… I wouldn't mind it if it's you."

"You… you want me?"

"I mean.." she hesitantly looked up "Well… I couldn't think of a better candidate in this world?"

Colonnello swallowed hard and if he had to actually hide his tears of relief when his flames broke out and he finally found a home then Leilani would never comment on it as she herself wasn't in a much better state.