Harry Potter, age ten, was scared of snakes. So, when he saw the massive snake slithering quietly towards him while he was gardening, the poor boy screamed. He tripped over a rake, which flipped in the air and pierced the snake in the skull. The snake's tail whipped around, whacking Harry in the head, causing him to pass out and hit his forehead, instantly killing the evil being in it.
As he fell, he startled a large bird which flew cawing up into the sky. It hit the jet engine of a large plane which was coincidentally carrying a massive truckload of petrol and secretly developed venomous snakes. The burning plane spiraled lower and lower, snakes dropping as it went, the pilots jumping out with them, and finally the plane crashed into a certain Lucius Malfoy's home, lighting it on fire and becoming fiendfyre as it burned the magical objects around it and absorbed them. This caused a certain journal to light on fire, and screaming it fell out of a window onto a man by the name of Quirinious Quirrel, proceeding to burn him with fiendfyre as well. The shrieking man bumped into Lucius Malfoy, who had just been about to escape. The house-elf Kreacher, in the middle of trying to destroy the strange locket Master Regulus had entrusted him, had felt Mistress Cissy's husband was in trouble and went to go help, only to be sent back by a shockwave of exploding energy and fire, the locket immediately burnt to a crisp.
A vanishing closet in the Malfoy Mansion caught fire, and as the fire travelled through it, its twin in a mysterious room in Hogwarts caught fire as well. The entire room burned, including a strange diadem hidden away.
As the corpse of Quirrel dropped to the floor, the evil spirit within him invaded Lucius' mind, commanding him to get a mysterious stone from its hidden location. Thirty seconds later, the evil spirit victoriously walked out with the object which would bring it back, only to be hit by a muggle ambulance which was desperately trying to find a hospital which wasn't full. The man and the ring were knocked into a stone grinder which had been left on the side of the road for no particular reason whatsoever, and had had a couple venomous snakes fall into it. The numerous wards on the stone had nonetheless failed to cover death via stone grinder infused with military-engineered basilisk-venom.
As Lucius was ground into tomorrow's cafeteria lunch hamburger meat, his arm jerked, causing his wand to fly out and pierce a Goblin who had been coming to enact a bank payment to a nearby house in the eye. Immediately alerted and duly utraged, the Goblins purged the entirety of every Malfoy and Black vault with, you guessed it, fiendfyre.
Dumbledore awoke to the screeching of silver instruments. Over the years he had been able to attune certain ones to Voldemort's magic. Every single one of them was making noises akin to that of a banshee. Dumbledore looked up at the time. Ten minutes since he'd gone to bed to take his midday nap. For the first time in eighty-nine years, Dumbledore cursed. "How in the name of Merlin's saggy rear end DOES EVERY TRACE OF VOLDEMORT DISAPPEAR IN TEN MINUTES?"