Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Twilight or Divergent. Those rights are reserved for Stephanie Myer and Veronica Roth.

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Two days passed since Bella escaped near death. Jasper had been quiet about it all. Lukas' surgery happened the next day on Bella's insistence and he was now cleared. No more brain tumor and he was recovering perfectly.

When Tris found out about what happened to Bella, she freaked out. She had almost lost her sister and she wasn't there to help her. She was fortunate that Jasper had found her and managed to help her when he did.

But that was the extent of Tris's knowledge. No one, outside of Jasper, Lukas and Carlisle knew about Bella's failed pregnancy and Eric. It would stay that way. If anyone found out in higher leadership, like Max, it was possible that Eric could be killed.

"Bella." Carlisle walked in carrying something.

"Hmm?"

"We're going to use a more ancient method of birth control. The serum metabolized quickly in your system so we're going to insert this. It'll prevent future pregnancies." Carlisle explained while he talked about an IUD.

Bella nodded. "Sounds good. I don't want to go through that again anytime soon. Though… I will be able to have kids later… right?"

"Of course. Whenever you're ready, we'll just remove it and everything will function as normal." Carlisle said with a small smile.

"Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me." Carlisle said.

"I do. I'm sorry about Edward. I…"

Carlisle put a hand up. "I won't understand what he did, but I'm not going to diminish what he did to you. He deserved what he got. That was his own mistake. Don't ever apologize for defending yourself. Remember who you are and where you are."

Bella knew that Carlisle had to be missing his son. But she just nodded, not talking about it anymore. She lay on the table now, just waiting on Carlisle to insert the device that should prevent any future scares until she was ready. There was too much she had to accomplish before that time came.


Bella walked into the training area while everyone was training. Eric was there with Four. He only spared a glance at her, but he went back to looking at the others training on the bags. Lukas walked over to her. He had his head bandaged and while he was cleared to be out of bed, Carlisle wasn't letting him exert himself physically just yet.

Lukas leaned in and kissed her quickly. It was important to continue the façade so that no one else could get suspicious. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

"I'm good. Several stitches and Carlisle fixed the birth control problem. How's Eric?" She asked lowly.

Lukas sighed. "He's… in a dark place I think."

Bella nodded. She knew that Eric was taking everything hard. He had been sullen since two days ago, but he had to immediately leave the next day for a special assignment for Max that required Four to lead training for that day and today was the first day that Bella really got to see Eric. "Alright, well, hopefully we recover fast and can get back to training.

That was the hope Lukas agreed that they needed normalcy after Edward.


Bella went back to the sleeping quarters after training was over. She pulled her shirt off, her bandages were wrapped around her stab wounds. Carlisle had told her it would be another week before she could do physical activity. The knife in her back had been shallow, which was good because she could have lost a kidney. The stab to her side had been deeper, but it missed important organs, so that was lucky. The only downside was that the blood that filled inside, is what the main reason for her losing the baby was. But she was on the mend. Just sore. It was hard for her to sit still for too long, but Lukas told her that she needed to take the time. Her position on the board hadn't changed, which wasn't a bad thing. Tris was holding her position at 23, which was a dangerous spot to be. Al was right behind her, but still in the red, so it was worrisome that he might not make it. Especially for Tris, because her and Al had developed a relationship with each other.

Bella was the only on there in the sleeping quarters right now, but she heard noise and she looked up at Al when he walked in. He was sweating a lot and so he pulled his shirt off. "Al." She called.

Al looked at Bella and walked over to her. Bella always thought that Al was nice and he was attractive. His dark shaggy hair and baby blues was what infatuated Tris at first. "Hey, how are you feeling?"

"You know. Sore, but I'm good. You look really sweaty."

"Yeah, Eric made me run laps until I nearly passed out." Al said and then sat on the cot across from Bella.

"Where's Tris?" Bella asked.

"Still running." Al said and then paused. "Do you think… nevermind."

Bella smiled. "Al, you can tell me anything. What's wrong?"

"I want to do something extraordinary. I want to get a tattoo dedicated to Tris. Do you think that's extreme?"

Bella thought it was sweet. "It's sweet. What's extreme is Jasper's tattoo."

Al laughed a little. "Yeah, I don't think I could tattoo Tris's bitch on my body. She's not one for the vulgarities."

"Well, you know she likes ravens." Bella suggested. "She also like's Dahlias."

"Okay. Then I can tell Tori those ideas and she can design something, right?"

"Of course. You just gotta tell her what you're thinking." Bella said and then stretched a little and her side twinged so she flinched.

"You okay?" Al asked, frowning.

Bella nodded. "Yeah, sometimes I stretch weird and it twinges like that. I'm fine."

Jasper threw something when he walked into the training room. It was his bottle of water and it drew Al and Bella's attention.

Bella frowned. "What's wrong?"

"Fucking Eric." Jasper said and then walked into the shower area.

Bella sighed. "Go tell Tori what you want. She'll hook you up." She said and stood, patting Al's cheek and walked to the bathroom. Jasper was naked now, turning on the shower. "Jasper. What happened?"

"Nothing." Jasper snipped and turned in the water.

Bella walked all the way over to the shower stall and stood there watching Jasper. "Obviously something happened."

Jasper turned and looked at Bella. "He's in a pissy fucking mood. I get he's hurting or whatever, but he needs to fucking chill."

"What did he do?" Bella asked, still not knowing what was happening.

"Tris is still fucking running laps and Chris and Will. Only reason why Al managed to escape is because Tris popped off at Eric, so she took his laps and then some. Al also nearly passed the fuck out."

"Jasper you know the training is hard."

Jasper shook his head. "You left training early. His attitude is all over the place. He is picking specifically on me, Tris, Chris, Will and Al. It's like the others don't exist."

Bella frowned. "I'll talk to him."

"No." Jasper sighed. "Don't do that." He ran his hands over his face. "I'm frustrated. I'm sorry."

Bella sighed. "Jasper it's okay to get frustrated. I'll talk to him. I need… to talk to him anyways. He hasn't talked to me since the day I was stabbed."

Jasper frowned now. "He hasn't? That was a big deal Bella, he can't just ignore what happened."

"Part of it is Max sent him on an assignment that took him out for an entire day and well, today was the first time I saw him and it was during training. I plan on going to see him later tonight, when everyone is in their bunks and sleeping."

"Just go now. I'll cover." Jasper said.

Bella raised a brow. "You sure?"

"Yeah, I'll make something up." Jasper said and brushed his hair back when he got it wet. "You need to talk to him. Figure things out."

"We need to talk too. When you're not frustrated." Bella said.

Jasper smiled a little. "Darlin', I'm okay. I told you I have no big attachments. We're friends, that's good. Is sex pretty cool with you, absolutely, but I'm not naïve."

Bella rolled her eyes. "Didn't say you were." She smiled a little. "The pregnancy thing… it scared you… didn't it?"

"Of course it did. You were hurt. That was what I was worried about. You were almost dead Bella. You could have died and I would have lost my best friend."

"I survived though. I'm stronger than I look."

"Well, the pregnancy thing messed him up too. He said you didn't even want kids. I was so confused at first, but as it played out, I understood then. You could have told me about what was going on. Using Lukas…"

"Has to be that way Jazz." Bella said and sighed. "There's too much at stake."

Jasper nodded. "I know. Just… be careful. Okay? Lukas is a good kid. He really likes you."

Bella knew that Lukas cared for her a lot and they had talked about it. "It'll be okay. Finish your shower. I'll go talk to him." She said and then fist bumped Jasper and left him there. Al was laying in his cot his arm over his face. He was tired, she could tell. She slipped out silently and took a different way up to Eric's room to wait for him.


Eric was on edge all day. A lot had happened the last couple days. He could not figure out how Bella's birth control serum failed. It never happened, it should have never happened. Before he could even begin to figure that part out, Max called him away from training. He wanted to talk to Bella before he had to leave, but he didn't have that choice. He thought back to yesterday.

Flashback

Max called Eric into the office. He was joined by Jeanine Matthews and Marcus Eaton. It wasn't uncommon to see leaders from other factions show up in Dauntless.

"Eric, this is Marcus Eaton. I don't think you've been formally introduced." Jeanine spoke.

Eric crossed his arms and nodded. "I don't believe I've had the pleasure."

Marcus was a little taller than Eric, but not much. His dark, greying hair was shaggier around the ears and he had some scruff on his face. His eyes were a stone color and his face was squared. He was dressed in the typical grey wardrobe from Abnegation. "It is a pleasure."

"Alright, what is this assignment that you need me to do?"

Marcus nodded. "I have rounded up three potential Divergents in my faction. I wanted to disclose this to Jeanine."

Eric raised a brow. "And you want me to go on assignment to get rid of the Divergents?"

Jeanine spoke then. "Yes. Take them to outside the wall. Kill them there and return to your training duties. Shouldn't take you long."

Eric sighed. "Alright. What is your cover story then?" He asked, looking at Marcus.

"Leave that to me. The less you know." Marcus said.

Max looked at Eric. "Make it fast. Use the train that runs outside the wall. I know you know the places that are not patrolled by other Dauntless."

"Got it. Have them ready by 5am." Eric said and looked at his palm pilot. "I'll have Four run training tomorrow." He said and looked back at Max. "The Edward situation has been handled."

"Good… and Bella Prior?" Max asked.

Eric nodded. "She's on the mend. Doc hasn't cleared her to come back to full training. She's 9th on the board."

Marcus was curious about Bella. She had been Andrew and Natalie's child. "Bella Prior?"

"Oh right, her parents are part of the council." Eric said. "Yeah, she got assaulted last night. Edward Cullen." He said.

Marcus frowned. "That's awful."

Eric shrugged. "Happens every year." He said and looked at Max. "Anything else?"

Max shook his head. "That is all. I'll see you at 5."

Eric left Max there with Jeanine and Marcus without another word.

The next morning, he went to the spot, Marcus and Max were there. Jeanine was nowhere in sight, but that was normal.

"You're on time." Eric said and then looked at the three people that Marcus had with him. They were just children, no older than ten. "They're it?"

"Yes." Marcus said and turned to the children. "This is a learning experience. Remember your manners. Eric will take good care of you." He said and the three children nodded. One of the children was a little girl, maybe 7 or 8. She had dark hair and dark eyes and reminded Eric of Bella, when she was a little girl.

Eric nodded. "Alright come on." He said and the kids followed him.

The train slowed enough for Eric to hoist the kids onto the train car. He got up on it and the train sped up. It had never completely stopped, but that was Max's doing. They had control over the transit system here, just no one else in Chicago knew.

The oldest, a boy, with reddish hair and freckles on his face, looked up at Eric. "You're in Dauntless?"

"Yeah." Eric said, keeping his words short.

"That's cool. I think Dauntless is the best faction."

Eric raised a brow and looked at the boy now. "What's your name?"

"Oliver."

"I'm Shannan and this is Mickey." The girl introduced the other boy who was quiet. He seemed meek. He looked slightly older than she was and they favored one another.

Eric nodded. "You sister and brother?"

Shannan nodded. "Yes, he's my big brother. I'm 7 and he's 9." She was sweet, her voice so soft.

Eric looked out the train car window. They were approaching the wall. "Well Shannan, it's nice to meet you."

When their train car passed the wall, he opened the side door and looked back at the kids. "Okay, this is going to be tricky, but I want you to trust me. Okay?"

The kids nodded and they waited for instruction.

Eric glanced out the car and waited a beat before he picked up Shannan first. "Shannan, I want you to take a breath. Kick your feet fast and your arms, I'm right behind you." He said and then he tossed her out of the car and she hit the water below. He looked at the other two. "We don't have time, come on."

The two boys looked frighten, so he pulled them to him and he held them as he jumped out of the car himself, hitting the water below.

After a small struggle, he got the boys over to where he tossed Shannan out. She was treading water like Eric had told her and she didn't seem panicked. The boys settled down when they realized they were okay.

They got to the shore and Eric helped them out of the water.

"What are we doing?" Shannan asked.

"We are going to your new home."

"Our what?" Mickey finally squeaked.

Eric looked at the boy and then got on his level. "Marcus Eaton is a bad man. So is Jeanine Matthews and my boss Max. I'm not a bad guy. Do you believe that?" He asked Mickey nodded. "I have some friends that live outside the wall. They will take really good care of you."

"What about our parents?" Oliver asked. His green eyes were sad and watering but he was trying to not cry.

Eric sighed. "I know it's going to be tough. It's supposed to be tough. You three are special. Do you know what that means?" His tone was gentle with the kids and when they all shook their heads he nodded. "You're what they call, Divergent."

"What's that?" Shannan asked.

"It means that you don't fit into the faction system. So when the leaders find you out, they have you killed. Do you understand what that means?"

Shannan frowned. "They want you to kill us?"

"Yes, but I'm not going to do that. Do you trust me?" He asked and they all nodded. "Good. Now stay close to me. I'm going to get you to the secret place." He said and the kids listened, staying with him as they trekked across what looked like a mix of the rocky nuclear terrain and greenery.

After two hours of hiking and the kids quietly hiking along, they made it to a spot. There were some broken buildings scattered and a lot of trees that had started to grown up there. Eric whistled sharply three times.

After a few minutes, a man appeared. He looked like he was of Asian descent. "Eric, you've come."

"I told you, I had three. I didn't know how old they were until this morning." Eric said. "George… they're kids."

The Asian man, was George Wu. The brother of Tori Wu and was presumed dead by the rest of Dauntless. "That's okay. We can take care of them." He said and then he looked at the kids. "I'm George Wu. I'm Divergent. Just like you." His voice was soft and he had a soft smile on his face.

The kids looked at Eric and Eric nodded. "He's my friend. He's going to make sure you guys stay safe and healthy. Trust me?" He said and they all nodded and went with George. "How are you on medicines?"

"We're okay. Carlisle managed to get some to us two weeks ago. The sickness is under control. Contaminated water. We fixed the issue." George explained.

Eric nodded. "Keep me updated." He said then him and George shook hands, their hands grasping the inside of each other's forearms. It was a symbol of brotherhood. They nodded to each other and then Eric left, making the trek back to where he needed to be to catch the incoming train.

End Flashback

Eric opened his door to his bedroom, ready to just shower and change. He needed to set up the sparring brackets for tomorrow, but when he walked in, he saw Bella, sitting on his bed. He unclipped the palm pilot, unholstered his gun and set it on the dresser. He looked at her, her expression tired.

"Hi." Eric said lamely.

"Hi?" Bella said, her brows furrowing. She stood, walking over to him. "You go two days without talking to me and that's the only thing you say?"

Eric sighed. "It's been a long 48 hours Bella."

"I get that, but don't you think you should have at least said something to me before then? You were there, at my bedside when I woke up from being stabbed and then you just disappear on me."

"I was on assignment."

"That doesn't justify you not speaking to me." Bella said, her dark eyes angry. "Then you are pushing Tris, Jasper and the others to the extreme. Taking out your pain on them."

Eric shook his head, brushing his hands over his face. "That's not what I was doing. I'm trying to push Tris so she can stay above the fucking line. She's this close from losing her spot." He said.

"Jasper too?"

"Jasper has a smart ass mouth. I'm not going to pull my punches out there because he's your best friend Bella. He has to learn that he needs to respect the ladder of leadership." Eric said. "He knew that he could push my buttons today and he did it. That is why he was running. Tris was running because she used her smart ass mouth to take up for Al. I'm trying here. I'm really trying to elevate them on that board because I don't want to see you hurt, but they got to put in the work. Al has all but given up at this point. I can't save him when in 4 weeks he doesn't make the cut. You do realize that right?"

Bella hadn't thought about it. "Jasper said it wasn't worth talking to you about."

"It isn't. If he's pissy, then so be it. That's on him. But I'm not going to stop doing my job because I'm fucking you."

Bella raised a brow. "Are we not more than that? Eric, we went through trauma together."

"Yeah. You went through trauma. You were the one that had to be stabbed and lose our baby. That wasn't me."

"You're hurting."

"Of fucking course I am Bella. For fuck's sake, seeing you like that killed me inside. You went through that and Lukas had his surgery. I'm spinning, I'm trying to stay grounded and if I come off as pissy at times then suck it the fuck up." Eric said. "I can't be perfect. I'm not Jasper and I'm not Lukas."

Bella shook her head. "I didn't say you had to be either of them. I just want you to fucking listen to me. I wasn't there so I can't attest to it, but you need to keep whatever it is you're hurt about, out of your training."

"You're telling me how to be a Dauntless instructor? Are you fucking kidding me right now." Eric looked at her appalled.

"I didn't say that."

"That's what you said Bella." Eric said and walked around her to the bathroom to turn on the shower.

Bella followed him. "You're always turning your back on me. Why can't we have one discussion without you getting pissed off."

"I'm not pissed off Bella, I'm just tired. I have a lot going on."

"Then talk to me about it. That's what I'm here for."

Eric pulled his shirt off and looked at her. "I can't talk about these things because they are classified. You are a recruit. You aren't even part of this."

"Classified or not, if something is bothering you then I should know what it is. It affects me too."

"No, it doesn't. It has nothing to do with you. You need to be in your bunk resting. Carlisle hasn't cleared you for anything and if you want to get back to training, you need to be there, not here."

Bella shook her head. "Are you serious? You don't even want to talk about the baby."

Eric was quiet a moment. He nodded then. "Sure, let's talk about that. The serum failed on you. That doesn't just happen. You now why? Because the serum has never failed before."

Bella got quiet. She knew why the serum failed. She was Divergent. Just like the serums for the simulations, the serum failed on her. She couldn't tell him that. She couldn't tell him that she was Divergent. His sole mission was to kill off Divergents. She didn't know if she could face that. Why did she even put herself through this with him? She knew that it could backfire on her. Now that she was falling in love with him. She was an idiot.

When Bella didn't say anything Eric frowned. "Bella. What's wrong?"

"Nothing. You're an ass." Bella muttered.

Eric sighed. "Bella, this is a two way street. If we're going to talk about the baby and everything else, then you have to say what you're thinking. I'm upset about it. Your life was put in jeopardy and then the baby died. That hit me harder than I realized."

"Do you even like kids?" Bella retorted.

"Wow." Eric said with a nod and then shook his head. "You're getting pissy with me too. If you have something you want to say, fucking say it."

"What are we doing?" Bella said, shaking her head, fighting tears.

Eric studied her. He saw how emotional she was. This was the biggest fight they have had. She was internalizing stuff and not telling him. "You don't trust me. What have I done since we've been together, that has forced you to distrust me?"

"You kill people." Bella said and sighed. "Tori said-"

"Tori doesn't fucking know anything." Eric cut her off. "I have not killed anyone."

Bella frowned. "She said her brother."

Eric scratched his brow. "Okay, well, that's the story. I didn't kill him." He couldn't tell Bella that George was alive. It literally was the one thing that was keeping George safe. Only him and Carlisle knew that he was alive, off grid housing every Divergent that Eric was ordered to kill. "Because she said I killed her brother, you don't trust me?"

"That's not it."

"How long have you been holding that one in?" Eric asked.

"I knew before I slept with you." Bella murmured.

Eric felt his chest squeeze. "Are you telling me… that you've been sleeping with me… this entire time… and you thought that I was some villain in this crazy fucked up story? What was your plan?"

"I don't know."

"To use me?" Eric asked.

Bella closed her eyes. "No, that's not it."

"No that's exactly fucking it. You wanted to get inside my head and figure out something for Tori." Eric said.

"It wasn't for her… it was for me."

Eric shook his head. "Unbelievable."

"Eric, please. I don't feel that way. Maybe at first I was interested in figuring you out, but then… I got attached."

"Get out." Eric said, his voice angry.

"Eric."

"No, get the fuck out. I cannot deal with this bullshit. I am a person. Bella. I am a fucking person. Just because we're in Dauntless doesn't give you the fucking right to break someone's heart."

Bella had tears come to her eyes. "Eric, that's not it. I don't want to break your heart."

"Really? Because it fucking feels like that. This is the reason I don't let my walls down. I let myself feel with you Bella. I have cried in your arms and shown you my weaknesses and this is what you do." Eric shook his head. "I fell in love with you. And this is what you do."

Bella felt the tears roll down her face. "Eric, I-"

"No. Don't fucking say it. You don't love me. You can't love me because if you did, you would have been honest with me."

"I'm Divergent. Tori said her brother was Divergent and I was scared." Bella sobbed, her legs getting weak and she started to fall to her knees.

Eric caught her as she sobbed. His arms circled her automatically and he held her to him. He was stunned. He never expected those words to come out of her mouth, yet they had. "Shhh… baby… shhh…" He smoothed her hair on her head. He felt like an ass. He pushed her too far. "I'm sorry." He murmured and closed his eyes as he kissed the top of her head.

Bella sobbed more against his naked chest. She didn't know what he would do now that he knew. Her heart hurt when he told her to leave and she realized that she loved him. She couldn't be without him and that scared her more than just telling him what she was.

After a few long moments, Bella leaned away and Eric wiped the tears off her face. His steel eyes studied her dark ones. "Bella, I would never… hurt you. I don't care if you're Divergent. That doesn't matter to me. I love you… I want to protect you. My job is to protect you."

"Why does Tori believe you killed her brother?" Bella asked, sniffing.

"Because that is what she was told." Eric said. "It is extremely important that she never knows the truth. It will put so many lives at risk."

"George isn't dead… is he."

Eric shook his head. "He's not. He is Divergent. I was ordered to kill him. There is a growing resistance. They are camped outside the walls. They house all the Divergents that I bring them. All the ones I am ordered to kill, I take them there, where they can be safe and out of harms way. Jeanine wants every Divergent killed. She wants control of this faction system. Marcus Eaton helps her."

"Marcus? Like Abnegation Marcus?"

Eric nodded. "I took three children beyond the wall yesterday. Shannan, Oliver and Mickey."

"Oh no. They're so little. Why would Marcus want them killed?"

"Because he figured out they're Divergent."

"How?" Bella asked. "How did he not figure out what I was?"

"Because you're parents are on the council. He would never cross that line." Eric said.

Bella sat back, thinking. "He was always creepy. Stared at me all the time."

"Yeah, I'm not fond of the guy." Eric admitted.

"So, you've been saving Divergents. Why?"

Eric nodded. "Because I'm Divergent." He said.

Bella was stunned. Her mouth dropped open slightly as he dropped that bombshell on her.

Eric reached a hand up and closed her mouth. He smiled a little. "More in common than you thought." He said. "I realized I was Divergent when I accidentally found some information back in Erudite. Jeanine had taken a liking to me. When you're young and if she likes you, she likes to groom certain kids. I was one of them. She saw something in us. We were her brightest students so to speak. She was lenient on me the most, but that's mostly because I'm pretty sure she has a thing for little boys, though I don't think she's acted on it. Either way, I stumbled across some information. Testing information on Divergents. There was a whole file. At the time, Max was the one that killed Divergents and it's true that he has actually killed Divergents. There's a serum that they use to do simulations. The same serum that they give you at your aptitude test. I read that the serum doesn't work on Divergents. One day, I wanted to see what I would get scored for my aptitude test so I would be prepared for my choosing. I know it's a cheap way, but I did it and discovered that the serum didn't work on me." He explained.

"You tested yourself?" Bella asked.

Eric nodded. "The simulations, aren't real and I knew that they weren't. When I was doing the simulation, I broke through the simulation by telling myself that it wasn't real."

"So you came to Dauntless for Lukas."

"I did. Jeanine was upset when I chose Dauntless. She thought I would stay Erudite. When it came time for my aptitude test, I scored Erudite. It was the only thing I knew how to do. So, I scored Erudite and changed factions anyways." Eric said.

"Wow. That's insane."

"Seems that way. Lukas is Divergent too." Eric said. "I didn't know about his tumor, but I knew that he was Divergent. There are more Divergents than you think. A lot of us are functioning in the faction system. We know how dangerous it is if leadership found out. When the serum failed for you. I had a thought, but then I… I put away that thought because I was certain you would have told me you were Divergent."

Bella swallowed. "I'm sorry. I was scared… I didn't know… I didn't know about all of this and honestly, I'm scared of myself."

Eric brushed her hair back out of her face. "Fear is what keeps us grounded. Being Dauntless doesn't mean you have no fear, it means that you are able to conquer your fear."

"I'm trying." Bella said and then rubbed her side.

"Are you hurting?"

"It's just sore." Bella said and then Eric helped her out of the floor.

Eric leaned in and kissed her softly before looking at her. "You love me?"

"I really do Eric. I promise you I do love you."

"Good." Eric said and kissed her again. The kiss was slow at first before it became deeper, but Eric brought the kiss to a close. "You need to rest. Go back to the sleeping quarters. Tell Jasper that I'm sorry. That he can come by and talk to me if he wants to sort it out. He's obviously hurting about what happened with you two days ago too."

Bella nodded. "I'll tell him."

"I love you." Eric murmured.

"I love you too." Bella said and then she left, feeling a lot better about everything.