Omega [REDUX]
Chapter 11
"I'm still going to have to pull you out for training during some of our breaks."
"Are you serious?" Anna pouted as she leaned against the wall, feeling the mattress beneath her and the blanket that covered as she looked towards the figure still sitting at the desk. "Elsa, I thought we covered everything during the term break."
"It's rather easy to forget a lot of these things," Elsa replied, eyes focused on the display. "I wouldn't want you to suddenly drop off for some reason just before the term exams."
"You know I won't," Anna replied. "I'm hardworking, I'm diligent—"
"I call you that if you stop struggling to get up every morning."
Anna laughed at the wry tone in Elsa's voice. "Don't tell me you don't struggle with that."
"I don't. I told you I barely sleep."
"Doesn't everyone else have that problem? Of getting up in the morning? What's wrong with me having the same problem?"
She watched as Elsa turned around and looked at her straight in the face. "I'm not training you to pass the exam, Anna. I'm training you to ace the exam."
Now Anna was confused, and a tad bit frustrated. "Why's that? I mean, you don't have to put that much effort into this if you don't want to. This wasn't your obligation anyway…" her voice trailed off.
"Anna," Elsa continued, with unwavering severity. "When you graduate this won't be a game anymore. When you enlist and go into active service, it'll be real. Everything that you know and feel in this academy will be wiped away, and you'll be fighting to survive. It isn't about who beats who in a simulation anymore, it's about who lives or dies." She paused for effect. "You need to get that in your head."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Anna retorted, genuinely pissed off now. "Big deal, princess."
"I don't want you to die out there!"
Anna recoiled at the sound; she'd never heard Elsa yell before, but there was something so resounding in her voice that really scared her. She gazed at Elsa's unmoving expression: eyes wide, teeth clenched together, staring back at her with a mixture of fury and worry. But even then the rush of emotions began to fade away, and Elsa looked away, now abashed and remorseful.
Momentarily, Anna remembered the snowflake scar on Elsa's back.
"I'm sorry," Elsa said in a soft voice. "I shouldn't have done that."
Anna felt her heart ache at those words. "No," she replied, "that was my fault. I shouldn't have been so insensitive."
"You weren't," came the response. "I guess I pushed you too hard. I just – I just wanted you to be prepared for anything that could happen."
Anna watched the platinum blonde curls sway with each movement of Elsa's head, mesmerized solely by the hypnotic motion. How did she even become angry with her in the first place? Inwardly she slapped herself.
An awkward silence passed between them, Anna pulling the blanket up to cover herself, Elsa sitting motionless at her desk. After what seemed like forever she saw Elsa shut off the display, rise to her feet, and stretch.
"You going to go, or you sleeping here tonight?"
"Staying." Anna looked away, afraid of Elsa's reaction. She'd originally started this entire arrangement by playfully forcing herself into Elsa's bed, amidst semi-violent protests that involved a decent amount of pinching and tickling. Elsa had relented, but Anna wasn't sure the deal was still on, especially since she'd just pissed Elsa off.
Luckily, the incident didn't seem to bother Elsa, who merely gave a nod in reply as she walked over to her wardrobe to retrieve a change of clothes. "I'll just… go take a shower," she said casually, albeit somewhat hesitantly, as she left the room. If it was due to the incident earlier, Anna could not tell.
Our first argument. Anna had a tendency to notice these things. She watched the door close quietly behind Elsa's fading silhouette, and almost hesitantly began to make herself comfortable in Elsa's bed.
Did Elsa even know how she felt about her? The more she thought about it, the more she felt it was plausible; this girl knew about next to everything there was to know. Advanced tactics, combat techniques, literature, history of the UIF… the list just kept going. Anna decided she wouldn't be surprised if Elsa had already guessed Anna's feelings, through whatever set of skills she possessed.
The prospect was not any less terrifying.
Anna decided that she wouldn't know how to react if Elsa decided to confront her about it. She still had so many questions left unanswered: did Elsa feel the same way about her? Would she reject her advances? More importantly, would it harm the relationship that they'd already established? As bad as Anna wanted to be more than just friends with Elsa, being anything less than that scared her. A lot.
Anna slammed her fist onto the wall behind her. I don't want to feel this way, she realized, but it feels so good at the same time. To be… in love with her – is that what it is? – but yet not have her with me. I want it to stop, but I also don't ever want this longing to end.
She felt a familiar stirring in her loins. Anna cursed inwardly; the only problem sleeping with Elsa posed was that of a lack of privacy. Normally Anna would be entirely willing to trade that off since being horny hadn't been a problem for her before, but ever since more and more thoughts of Elsa had popped into her head, a lot had changed. Now Anna realized how dependent she'd been on the nightly sessions she had alone in her room, writhing with pleasure under the sheets.
I can do it right here…
No! Another voice, the voice of reason, yelled out immediately. That's… messed up! And she'll probably find out when she comes back.
The voice of reason was, unfortunately, not quite compelling enough. Anna drowned out that sound as she slid a hand into her shorts, feeling her slick folds underneath. Her heart rose to her throat as she realized what she was about to do, her emotions a combination of lust, passion and need.
Eventually she just chose to forget about everything and let her fingers do the job, circling around her sensitive, aching clit. To hell with it, if I get caught. Some perverted part of her mind fantasized about Elsa walking in on her, and how she would invite Elsa to partake in this particular activity, and then—
Anna felt her cheeks flush, partially due to embarrassment, partially due to the pleasure she was feeling. She replaced the contact on her clit with her thumb, allowing two of her fingers to slide inside her. Her breath hitched, and Anna fought the urge to contain a moan; Elsa could be back any minute.
God, this is so hot.
Her other hand moved upwards under her tank top to caress her left breast, squeezing the hardened nub, sending an electric jolt across her upper torso, all the way to her toes. Anna exhaled sharply as her eyes closed in bliss, her own fingers pumping in and out of her pussy, her fervor heightening with every motion. Her mind whited out, all her thoughts focused solely on Elsa, one particularly image of them getting very, very intimate in the shower spurring her motions on. Her eyes pictured them held close together, soaked bodies pressed tightly together, Elsa's head nuzzling hers as water trickled ticklish trails down their skin, their fingers both inside each other, thumbs on each other clits as they drove each other crazy with pleasure. Anna could almost hear Elsa's moans mixed in with her own, could almost feel Elsa's soft, warm lips on hers, and that did it for her.
The fact she'd done it in Elsa's own room, on Elsa's own bed only served to turn her on more. She came violently, forcing her to clamp her left hand over her mouth as her vaginal walls contracted over her right one, her eyes becoming thin slits of desire and longing as she rode through her orgasm, the pleasure overwhelming but leaving her wanting more.
Anna would have gladly masturbated five more times, if that was what it took, had it not been for the fact that she was now exhausted and she couldn't move. With a sigh, and the occasional deep breaths, she laid back against the pillow, eyelids drooping, and the low hum of the air-conditioning unit becoming a monotonous lullaby that sang her to sleep.
Anna completely forgot about that incident as the days wore on, the reopening of the term having brought back their monotonous routine that she'd almost forgotten as well. Elsa may have taught her how to perform in the simulation, but she struggled in class. The lecturers didn't help a bit. If there was any indication as to how badly she was performing in class, it was the ever increasing amount of sketches she ended up doing during those periods.
"You might want to stop doing that," Merida pointed out one day, as the lesson wore on, Anna's own ears oblivious to the droning of their instructor, who was teaching them emergency protocols. "This is kinda important."
"Sorry," Anna replied, closing her sketchbook and reinstating her "discipline", trying to promise herself that she wouldn't do it again. Most of the time, it didn't work.
Evidently, this activity of hers didn't go unnoticed by Elsa, because after that specific lesson Elsa pulled her away to walk down a separate corridor as the rest of the teams began to walk back to their respective rooms. "What?" Anna protested.
"You can't keep drawing in class."
"It's not my fault." Anna held up her hands as she spoke. "I can't focus. The lecturer keeps droning on and I can barely concentrate."
"Like I said, Anna, you're going to be enlisted once you graduate. It's critical for you to know every single thing." Elsa sighed as she leaned against the corridor, watching Anna stand before her. "You won't always have people to cover for you."
"We're always deployed in teams—"
"And what happens when the rest of your squadmates are taken out in a real battle?"
Only now did Anna remember that incident back in Elsa's bedroom; her outburst remained fresh in Anna's memory, and if anything she was unwilling to let that repeat itself. "Sorry," she muttered in reply.
"You don't have to be sorry to me, Anna," Elsa said. "I just want to make sure you can take care of yourself, even if everyone else is dead."
Anna grimaced. "Kinda morbid, don't ya think?"
"It's entirely possible."
"Yeah, well, they'll probably reject me anyway. I probably won't even pass the test at this rate."
"Come on, don't be that way." Elsa took Anna's hands into her own, and Anna's own eyes widened, desperately suppressing the urge to gasp. God, her skin feels so smooth—
"Anna? Are you listening?" Elsa cocked an eyebrow, even as she looked straight into Anna's eyes, her intense blue orbs sparking off a familiar longing within Anna. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah! Yeah, of course I'm listening." I must be so flustered right now…
"I've noticed something about you."
Her heart thudded. "N… noticed what?"
"Something that's holding you back. Something that's preventing you from performing at your best."
Shit, she didn't guess, did she? "A… and what's that?" Anna stuttered.
"A lack of self-confidence."
A wave of relief washed over Anna, but it was mixed with a tinge of disappointment; she thought they were getting somewhere, even if Elsa did actually guess her feelings, but evidently she hadn't. She didn't know how to feel right at that moment. "What do you mean?" she asked, lamely.
"You don't believe that you can do these things, Anna," Elsa went on. "And… it's compromising how you perform. You keep thinking that you're unable to do these things when you actually can."
"How do you know what?"
"Trust me. Just like… how you trust someone with a snowflake scar on her back." Elsa looked away, now unable to meet Anna's gaze.
Anna didn't expect things to take such a drastic turn. "It's… it's nothing," she said, still at a loss at what to say. "The scar means nothing, Elsa."
The platinum blonde gaze a mere sigh in reply. "I can't thank you enough for your faith in me, Anna," she said, and her words made Anna's heart melt all over again. "Now I just need you to have faith in yourself."
"Least I could do."
"Then it shouldn't be a problem for you to believe in yourself."
"You make it sound easier than it actually is," Anna responded dejectedly, but unwilling to tear her hands away from Elsa's firm but somewhat tender grasp. "I've got nothing to believe in."
She watched Elsa's own demeanor change, shifting her weight a little, eyes looking back down to the floor. She's not quite different from any of us, Anna realized.
"Even if you don't believe in yourself," said Elsa, taking a deep breath as she said so, "we do. We're here for you, because we're your team. All of us believed you could do it. And you still can." Anna felt her grip tighten around her own hands, the warmth permeating her own skin, and she swallowed.
"I don't want your trust to be misplaced."
"I think we're pretty good judges of character."
For a while they just stood in the empty hallway looking awkwardly around.
"You don't seem convinced," Elsa noted. Anna realized that she must have still worn a dejected look on her features. She watched timidly as Elsa cocked her head and gazed into her eyes. "The look doesn't suit you."
"What does?"
"Smiles."
The corners of Anna's lips curled. "Don't flatter—"
"There, that's it." Elsa reached out and caught her face, the cool fingertips on her cheeks sending trembles down Anna's spine. "That's just the look. Your small smile and sparkling eyes."
Anna didn't know how she was pulling that look off, but tried to maintain it just for Elsa's sake. "Better?" she asked softly.
"It's not me that needs to feel better, it's you."
Anna sighed. "Honestly, I appreciate everything you're doing, but I really don't know what you see in me."
"Do you want a metaphor?"
"Metaphor?" Anna arched an eyebrow as Elsa walked off slowly, her own feet compelling her to trail slowly behind. "How long do you spend in the library?"
"Before I was assigned to Valkyrie and met you guys, I was in there a lot." A pause. "It's not important. But let's just say I wanted to give you a 20 dollar bill."
"Why would you do that?"
"Let's just assume I'm being generous. Would you take it?"
What? "Er… yeah, sure, why not?"
"What if I were to crumple it and stomp on it under my foot? Would you still take the money?"
"Yeah, duh. It's still worth something right?"
Elsa smiled, stopping in her tracks and turning to Anna. "That 20 dollar bill is like you, Anna. Life might crumple you and crush you under its heel, and make you feel worthless, but your value doesn't change. Others will testify to that."
Anna didn't know what to say for a few moments. It was either the overwhelming metaphor, or, more likely, it was the radiant glow of Elsa's hair and an expression upon her serene features she had never seen before: the expression of happiness as she gazed straight back at Anna. Dumbstruck was probably the word, she realized.
"Hello? Earth to Anna?"
"I… oh. Sorry," Anna said, blushing and turning away quickly, hoping desperately that Anna had not seen her blushing furiously. "It's… you know… the metaphor, you know."
"Yeah," Elsa replied, seemingly suppressing a giggle. "I know."
Oh god. I don't know whether to laugh or cry; I'm fucking mortified. "We'd… we'd better go," Anna stammered, still avoiding Elsa's teasing gaze. "We'll be late."
"That's true." Elsa walked past her, but not before taking Anna's own hand into hers and pulling her gently along. "Come on."
Anna hadn't expected to find a friend in Elsa through a series of pep talks, but she definitely felt better, and if anything, a lot more comfortable around her. So she gave Elsa a small smile, and reveled in the sensation of her skin in contact with Elsa's hand as they walked back to their team dorm.