A/N: So my lovely beta Stef would like me to keep writing this domestic Darvey forever. But we've got to move forward somehow right?
Thank you all for reading and commenting this year. The response has been so much more than I could have hoped for. I want to wish you all a wonderful New Year's. Let's hope 2022 finally brings light at the end of the tunnel (or at least the current lockdown). If not we'll just have to keep writing to keep our minds of it all, aye. Let me know your thoughts in a review. Highly appreciated as always.
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Feels Like Home
Chapter 15
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My arms are open
My arms are open
My arms are open
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Harvey is rooted to the spot for a few seconds. He is ready to talk but that is obviously not going to happen so his mind switches gears and he enthusiastically greets Rachel.
Hugging her, he spots a crossword book in the egg chair. That hadn't seen the daylight for a couple of weeks. He glances at Donna. Her right leg is juggling ever so slightly and she's plucking her lip. He knows enough.
Letting go of Rachel, he doesn't engage in a conversation about her surprise but is drawn to Donna. He crouches down in front of the sectional, silently placing a hand on her leg. It stops moving and Donna meets his eyes with a blush. Harvey brushes a few stray strands of hair out of her face.
"Challenging day," he states and Donna nods.
Rachel sits down at the opposite side with a surprised look. The redhead had seemed fine to her so far.
"Did I—?" Harvey asks.
A negative shake from Donna.
"Can I—?"
Another shake of the head.
"Just one of those days." She shrugs quietly.
"You happy with—?" Harvey trails off with the subtlest tilt of his head in Rachel's direction.
A genuine smile appears. "Yes!" she replies decidedly.
Harvey squeezes her hand. "I'm going to get changed." He gets up and in passing his knuckles grazed her cheek.
Rachel raises her eyebrows but doesn't say anything.
Harvey halts in the doorframe.
"Have you eaten?" he asks as he turns to face them.
Rachel keeps quiet. Though he wasn't clear, it is obvious his focus is solely on Donna.
Donna bites her lip. "Your fruit salad."
"And that fat-free yogurt," Harvey finishes for her. He shakes his head. "You need some sustenance. Shall I fire up the grill? Assuming D'Agostino delivered as expected?"
"They did," Donna confirms. "Except for…"
"The ricotta," Harvey fills in. "Again?"
"Yep."
"Well, you're going to have to wait another week to taste my roasted beetroot tart then."
"Waiting patiently. But it must be out of this world, with how you are set on serving me this."
"Oh, it is." Harvey wiggles his eyebrows. "Now, can you—?"
"Season the fish pieces?"
Harvey bobs his head.
"And…"
"Make that salad with asparagus and radishes?"
Harvey nods again.
"And you think we should wrap—?"
"A few cobs? With a guest definitely," Donna says decisively. "I'll make the—"
"Chili butter to brush on top." Harvey licks his lips. "I'll throw some skewers in the water to soak." And he disappears inside.
Donna looks up at Rachel who is staring at her.
"What?"
"Nothing," Rachel denies.
The two women head inside where Rachel watches Donna expertly weave her way around the kitchen, gathering everything on a tray to bring outside.
"So, you have eaten this before, I gather?" Rachel says, busy cutting radishes and preparing the asparagus.
"Yeah." Donna grows flustered. "It's an easy-to-make, light meal. We've had to throw out too much spaghetti because I couldn't eat a thing. We've been eating this at least once a week lately."
She threads prawns, salmon, and whitefish onto skewers together with pineapple chunks. After tossing them in coconut milk, she rolls the fish kebabs into a plate of desiccated coconut.
"Mike and I have some standard go-to recipes we fall back on as well." Rachel tips all the greens into a big bowl. "I think every family has," she says innocently.
Donna's mouth opens, closes, and opens again when Harvey materializes. She decides the only oil thrown on the fire should be the one Harvey uses for the BBQ and keeps quiet, making a mental note to talk to him when Rachel leaves.
All plates have been polished off as Donna goes inside to whip up a quick dessert. Rachel's eyes land on Harvey, staring at him hard.
He stares back, daring her to come out with it.
"Can you go put on a suit? Harvey Specter in a polo and shorts is unsettling."
Harvey barks a laugh.
"That's how I feel when Mike's secretary answers with Zane Ross. I remember the time neither of you had a law school diploma."
"One of us still doesn't." Rachel wiggles her eyebrows with a smirk.
"Bam, Zane one, Ross zero!" Harvey makes an exploding gesture with his hand. "Speaking of the pup, where is he?"
"Back home, working on a hard case."
"I get it. He needs to work his ass off now that I don't close the deals for him."
Rachel wisely chooses to ignore that. She beckons him forward. "We need to talk." Her voice quiet but stern.
Harvey gives a subtle nod of the head just when Donna steps outside.
…
Pulling out his AirPods, Harvey yells, "It's me, I'm home," tossing his belongings on the counter. He steps out of his running shoes and pats towards the bedroom on his socks. In his hand a bouquet of flowers. The doors are about ⅔ closed. "I got you—" He starts sliding open the barrier between his living room and bedroom.
In his bed is Donna, snuggled into his warm spot as per usual, but on the other side is Rachel, lounging against the headboard. She waves, sticking a piece of bacon in her mouth.
"What's this?" Harvey frowns.
"I gave Rachel a key in case of an emergency. That way I don't have to bother you at work," Donna replies.
"This is so good," Rachel exclaims.
"Hey, does Harvey know his bathroom looks like a rom-com movie?" A familiar voice says, opening the bathroom door. Harvey turns around in the direction of the voice. The person snatches the bouquet from his hands. "Awww Harvey, you shouldn't have," Mike mocks, clutching his heart.
Harvey is rooted to his spot. He scratches his cheek, processing all the information of the past thirty seconds.
"When did you get here?" he directs at Mike.
Mike sniffs the flowers. "Late last night."
"Give me that." Harvey grabs back the bouquet. "I thought you had some hard case that needed your expertise?"
"I did. Finished it. This brain is awesome." Mike taps at his temple, snatching a piece of bacon as well. "This is good," he says with a full mouth.
Harvey rolls his eyes. "I made that breakfast for Donna."
"Oh, there is plenty Harvey, relax." Donna sits up. "Are those for me?"
Harvey's face softens. He sits down on the edge of the bed next to her. He eyes Mike and Rachel uncomfortably while Donna smells the flowers. "I know peonies are your favorite so…" he trails off.
"Thank you." Donna beams. "I love them."
"Look, I have to get ready for work. Promise me you will eat this breakfast that I painstakingly made for you." He emphasizes the last word, shooting a look at Mike and Rachel. They wave at him, chewing and humming content.
"And I would also like to be in the loop in case of an emergency, regardless of the key situation," he whispers softly in her ear as he leans forward to kiss her cheek.
He walks over to the doors of his closet. "Also, don't let Mike snoop in here when I'm not around." He waves around the room with his index finger.
Mike immediately calls out, "Oh Batman, please let me see the wonders of your magic cave, the walk-in closet."
"What you don't have one? Is that because you don't make enough money with a clinic or because a walk-in closet full of Robin's underwear is just ridiculous?" With those words, Harvey disappears inside leaving Mike to give him the finger behind his back.
…
"I'm home!" Harvey yells as he turns the key in the lock.
"We're in the living room, Honey," Mike shouts back.
Harvey sighs. It's gonna be a long night. He sees Mike and Rachel on the couch but other than that, the room is empty.
"Where is Donna?"
"Hello, nice to see you too," Mike teases.
Harvey scowls. "Where is Donna?"
"Relax Harvey, I'm right here." Donna appears in the doorway. "I was just putting away our dry cleaning the concierge delivered."
Mike pulls a pair of wide eyes at Rachel.
Harvey marches over and scoops Donna up in a hug. "Good day?" he softly asks.
"Good day," she confirms.
The four of them decide to head out to Sfoglia for dinner. An upscale Italian restaurant that has curbside dining, complete with string lights and teal umbrellas.
Walking is still Donna's favorite mode of transport and with the current weather conditions no punishment. As per usual, Harvey grabs Donna's hand when they leave the building. Behind their backs, Mike shares a look with Rachel as they link their hands together as well.
Donna has gone to the bathroom when Harvey orders a bottle of Merlot. He wants to pour her a glass upon her return but she blocks the glass with her hand. "I better not. I took oxazepam earlier."
Harvey's brows furrow and his shoulders droop. "Why?"
Donna scrunches up her nose when she speaks. "We went to my building."
A slow, disbelieving headshake makes it clear how Harvey feels about it. "Why would you do that?" he asks softly.
"Because I have to live my life. I can't live with you forever. Hilli suggested it." Donna averts her eyes from Harvey's scrutiny and lets them travel to Rachel and Mike. They give her a subtle nod from behind their menu.
If their friends weren't here, Harvey would express his concerns but the words unspoken are loud enough for him to hear. His thoughts are spinning. She said it was a good day. That was clearly a lie but he believed her because she looked relaxed due to the oxazepam. His throat tightens when the thought dawns she might have done this before.
And why didn't she tell him about Hilli's suggestion? And why did she take Rachel and Mike? They have only been here for two days and he's been here for nearly three months.
A sense of betrayal wraps itself around his heart and rocks his mind to the very core. He sends Donna a long, pained look before breaking eye contact. He brushes aside the nervous signs she is showing now.
He keeps to himself the rest of the night. He is happy to let Mike take the floor with Seattle stories while he quietly eats his goat cheese agnolotti. It doesn't taste as good as it usually does. He pretends not to notice Donna often looking in his direction from behind her locks, laughing at Mike's tales.
Harvey hangs back leaving the restaurant. Sensing the atmosphere Rachel links arms with Donna, strolling ahead. Mike falls into step with his best friend. They haven't had a private minute together so far. Harvey chooses to remain silent, his eyes not leaving Donna's back.
After a few minutes, Mike's dam bursts. "What the hell, Harvey?" he says agitated, trying to keep his voice low.
Harvey's jaw clenches.
"What do you think you are doing with Donna?"
"I'm sorry, I thought I was nursing her back to health for the past three months but clearly you have an opinion on it after two days," Harvey sneers.
Mike halts. Harvey is tempted to keep on walking but he doesn't want Donna to overhear.
"This isn't helping her. This is playing house."
"But bringing her back to the place of her trauma is?" Harvey scoffs.
"It was her own suggestion. She is a big girl that can make her own choices!"
Harvey sighs heavily. "It was her choice not to eat anything if she is having a bad day. Mind you, I didn't wait until she lost 10 pounds. I pushed her because she wasn't in the correct frame of mind to make the right choice. I made the choice to call a therapist. Are you going to fight me on that one too?"
"I think you need to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself if you are actually helping her along in her progress or if this is about your need to have her close." Mike's tone is sharp.
Harvey cocks his head, shaking it.
"I'm going to walk away before I say something I regret. You have some nerve showing up here twelve weeks after the fact, claiming you've got Donna's best interest at heart and I don't."
Harvey marches away so fast he overtakes Donna and Rachel, not waiting for them, he keeps on walking. He disappears inside his building without saying goodbye.
Mike and Rachel say their farewells at the door and leave once Donna is inside the elevator. The ride up to Harvey's penthouse seems endless and it only gives her time to get worked up. None of them are willing to talk but she knows she is the subject of a disagreement.
With a wildly beating heart, she enters the condo. Shuffling to the bedroom, Donna finds Harvey in the bedroom, already in a shirt and his boxers.
"Harvey…"
"Not tonight Donna," Harvey says brusquely.
Donna nods quietly, going into the bathroom to get changed.
When she is in bed five minutes later, Harvey pulls her close. Regardless of what happened, he is not subjecting her to nightmares out of anger over the words of his friend.
…
Sitting in his office, gnawing away at the end of his pen, Harvey doesn't hear his cell phone ping.
He is mulling over Mike's words. He doesn't care for the rude way Mike comes waltzing in months later and has his opinion ready from the first second, but he might not be entirely wrong. It's what he has been struggling with himself. Rubbing the back of his neck, he is unsure what to do next.
It's the end of the week and he has been avoiding all three of them. Coming home around midnight, when Donna is already in bed. He texts Donna once a day to ask if everything is okay but it is nowhere near the text marathon they often have when he is at work. Frustration is boiling up. This is what he wanted. He was about to talk to Donna when Rachel suddenly showed up. No, it isn't. You were hoping for a different outcome of that conversation, a small voice inside his head tells him.
His phone starts ringing. A quick glance tells him it's Mike. He ignores the call. When it stops, he sees several text notifications on his home screen. They all feature the name Donna. Mike immediately rings again. This time he picks up.
Mike skips the introductions. "It's Donna."
Harvey's heart starts racing and plummets to the floor at the same time.
"She's having a severe panic attack and we can't get through to her."
Harvey grabs his wallet and keys from the top drawer and starts running.
"Put on my Miles Davis record, give her a glass of water, keep counting from one to ten over and over. I'll be there as fast as I can," Harvey yells into his phone, pushing the elevator button frantically, ignoring the stares of his colleagues.
"We're not at your place," he hears Mike say, his voice sounding far away. A sudden, overwhelming sensation of dread takes hold of him. "We're at Donna's apartment."
Harvey puts his hand on the elevator wall in an attempt to steady himself. He feels as if an elephant sat down on his chest. He closes his eyes as his entire world goes vertigo.