Guest1: You are going to discover it soon. And thank you for telling me about the spelling mistake. I corrected it.
Guest2 and Guest3: I am happy that you enjoy the story!
Guest4: I don't know if you will read it but I want to tell you that I am just as much a mythology nut case as you are. I know all the myths that you mentioned and they are a big part of my story. I always tell about the real myths in my author's notes. But you are right about the fact that Calypso's origins are not that much unknown (she even got canon parents in this fanfic). So, I corrected that. I didn't use real goddesses (or Apollo's canon lovers) for my story because I lacked inspiration. But the dolphin did inspire me. So this is truly a "What if" kind of story. And no, I never trust Wiki and I put a lot of efforts in the research. I didn't know that Apollo was the only blond in the Pantheon (but I should have noticed it!). My character wasn't even supposed to be blond at first but I changed as soon I noticed there is yellow on the species she is based on. And yeah, Apollo also has the same tempter as his father in the story!
Visitor: You are going to see!
Guest5: Yes, he did.
Guest6: Knowing how much unlucky he is in love, I can understand you for feeling bad for him!
Guest7: I'm happy to read this! The chemistry between two characters is so important for me.
Guest8: Sorry for distracting you so much, eh!
7DeadlySins: Done!
Thank you for your comments!
Chapter 11: Hyacinth
It was still night time when Apollo woke up. He blinked his eyes. The big full moon glowed in the sky. His twin sister Artemis loved these few occasions when her own entity appeared bigger than the sun. She was just as prideful as himself! But Apollo definitely enjoyed when the moon could illuminate better the being he shared the bed with.
The god moved his head to watch the young man asleep on his shoulder. All naked with his waist covered by the white blanket. His lustful eyes detailed the musculature of his chest, the curls of his black hair and the peaceful way he breathed. His stare was locked to the splendid view.
The name of his lover was Hyacinth.
A mortal prince of Sparta. Very athletic but also very beautiful. Apollo had always been attracted as much by men than by women. But Hyacinth was the first to really catch his attention. One day, he trained with his sword and his prowess captivated the god. He thought this mortal could provide a good distraction. And he needed one in order to forget…well something he preferred to really not think about.
But as soon he succeeded to seduce the youth, he found himself highly surprised. He began to be very much attached. He visited him more often, even craved his presence. The Spartan, although nervous at first, grew to truly like him.
But he had not been alone. Zephyr, the God of the West Wind, had also attempted to seduce the young prince. But at the end, between them, it was him that he chose! Apollo was loved in return!
Being loved in return… A feeling he finally experimented for the first time. And how terrific it felt! It was like being electrified. Like floating in the air. Like eating food after starving for a very long time. It was just…
"Apollo?"
The god finally noticed that his companion was awake. He turned to watch him rubbing his eyes with his hand, probably still tired a bit.
"Something wrong? You should keep sleeping." The son of Zeus asked.
"No. It's just that I want to enjoy your presence before you have to leave to drive the sun chariot. I hate to wake up in an empty bed."
Apollo smiled. Then, he kissed him softly before succumbing to the taste of his lips and letting himself be drown by the passion. The prince gave him back his love with the warrior's fire that came with the tough Spartan education. The deity liked how his lover wasn't afraid to do some fight. He wasn't the kind that would easily submit to a god. And that just made their relationship even more dynamic, but no less tender.
Apollo broke the kiss. It was time for him to leave.
"I have to go. Duty calls me."
But Hyacinth caught his arm to keep him there. "Are you sure you have to go?"
Apollo smiled. The short separation was just as hard for him as it was for his beloved. "Yes, my love. I have an agreement with Helios on how we split our turns with the sun chariot. He would clearly not appreciate that I skip my turn, today. And I am proudly a dutiful god."
Hyacinth only replied by sulking. Apollo laughed. His lover liked to praise himself as a grown man but could sometimes act like a child. "Don't give me that face." He told him. "I promise you that tomorrow we will practice throwing the discus together. I know you like it."
And he kissed him goodbye before leaving for the sunrise.
During the day, his smile refused to leave his face. Apollo had found happiness… He had never thought it would be possible since that event.
…
Every day, a mermaid swam through the sea. A beautiful, playful and compassionate one. She wasn't like the others. She didn't possess a fish-like tail. No, she was associated with a particular sea creature: the magnificent dolphin.
And the dolphins represented everything for Delphina. They were her friends, her children. They were a true family for her. With them, she saved the sailors in distress at the sea. She guided the fishermen. She inspired them with her compassion and her kindness. For that, people worshipped her greatly. Not at the level of an Olympian but she was still the object of a true devotion from the mortals.
She was also a patron goddess of Delphi… Now, it had become the hardest part of her job.
She had to avoid Apollo all the time when she went there. She never wanted to see him again and was too stubborn to change her mind. Against his own wishes, the god grew to respect her decision and always made sure to not be with her when she had to accomplish her duties by obligation.
And yet, it was harder than she thought it would be. No matter how cruel he could be, a part of her still liked him a lot. And so…she hated to admit that she missed him.
She stopped swimming. Her heart was hurting. She needed to stop thinking of him. But how not simple it was! She just realised how close to him she had become.
Maybe it was a mistake to cut their relationship…
No! He deserved it! Someone so arrogant, so cruel and ruthless wasn't worthy of her time! She just needed to remember the poor Marsyas and anger came back to her.
No, she would not forgive him. She didn't know what he was doing right now and didn't care at all!
And so, she kept swimming with her dolphins. They represented everything she needed anyway.
…
The sun stood alone in the blue sky. For sure, it was the announcement of a wonderful day. Hyacinth went to the meadow, wearing a white cloth around his waist, happier than ever. He remembered too well how he felt when he met Apollo, his lover. He was at first intimidated and scared. He feared to end up as a plaything against his will since he knew too well the reputation of the gods. They rarely took no as an answer. But luckily, the God of the Sun had been truly kind and began to act like a friend. He seemed to only want to learn to know him at first.
And they did. And the more they did, the more they fell for each other. Hyacinth couldn't believe it. Apollo was an incredibly gorgeous man. It was difficult or even impossible to not be attracted when you put your eyes upon his body. Yet, he had always failed to find any success in love. The prince thought it had to exist a good reason for such a lack of luck. But he never found it. The deity proved to be very gentle and attentive. Yeah, he was a little arrogant and very prideful. But as a proud Spartan, Hyacinth was just the same. He could simply relate to him.
But more than that, he couldn't explain. That was it. This chemistry that no one could tell how it came to be. The Fates decided for them. And together they found love and happiness.
However, they also forgot how Fates could be cruel.
This afternoon, he joined Apollo in the meadow. There was a space made to practice athletic exercises. As a member of the royal family, Hyacinth could reserve it for himself alone. Exactly what he did. Apollo didn't like to be around mortals too much and honestly, they both preferred to stay alone together.
When he finally saw the god, always punctual, his heart began to beat very quickly. His beauty was too great. Sometimes, he couldn't comprehend how someone so perfect could be attracted by a mortal like him. Only a fool would be able to turn his stare away from this marvellous view.
"Hello, my love. How are you?"
"Very well, if you don't count how it is difficult to walk after what you did to me, last night."
"Ho! Are you going to complaint?" Apollo replied with humor. "By the way, you are a Spartan. You are tougher than that."
"You bet I am! I trained a lot recently. And this is why I will beat you this time!"
"Be careful, young boy. Unwise is the one who dare to defy a god."
"Or what? You will punish me?" Hyacinth retorted, playing the game.
"Maybe if you insist about entering the danger zone."
Apollo's voice… Damn! The chills it gave were too pleasurable. But Hyacinth will not let him have too much power over him. He was here to prove himself. He took a discus and said. "Well. Just look at me."
He held the object, his arm spread, and turned a lot of times before throwing the discus. The object landed. He looked at the distance. He beat his own score!
"See? I improved!"
"Impressive. But still not enough to beat me."
To prove his point, the deity took another discus, repeated the same movement and threw the discus at least three meters further.
Hyacinth couldn't believe it. "Wait! You have never thrown the discus that far before!"
"Well, I didn't want you to be too much discouraged by my talents. You are so adorable when you try to surpass me."
"That's not funny! Stop making me pass for a fool!"
"It is never my intention. Trust me."
But Hyacinth didn't buy it. He wanted to show how strong he was. Of course, he knew he could never compete with a god, but still! He wanted to earn the sincere admiration of his lover.
"I will try again. But not further. Higher this time."
"Hyacinth." Apollo warned. "Don't start to give me this attitude." His beloved could be just as proud as himself. It was a part of his education, after all. "Don't push yourself too much."
"So what if I do?"
And after saying that, he went to take the discus and, with a lot of concentration, he threw it the highest he could. And what a height! It was just as high as the trees. When the object hit the ground, Apollo couldn't hide his surprise.
He never expected this.
"You see?" Hyacinth bragged. "Admit you are really impressed this time!"
Apollo loved the youth a lot. But he was a dominant by nature. He always felt the need to be the best. The prince might be his lover, but he remained only human.
Feeling the need to defend his ego, Apollo took the discus and retorted. "Well. I cannot lie. You have impressed me. However, remember that I am a god. I will show you how high I can throw it."
Hyacinth expected this kind of answer. The divinity never refused a challenge. Nonetheless, he was prepared to push his own limits in order to have his talents recognized. He needed to show how tough he was!
But he also forgot how strong a god really was.
When Apollo threw the discus, it was so high that it almost touch the sky. Hyacinth ran to where it was probably going to land. The god was too distracted by his amazing prowess to notice soon enough what his beloved was attempting to do.
But at the end, he finally noticed him. Panic ran through his blood.
"Hyacinth! Get away from there! It's dangerous!"
"What?!"
But it was too late. The discus fell fast and in a matter of some seconds… A strong impact resonated.
Apollo stopped to breathe, his eyes opened too widely, his body shook uncontrollably. Only one image haunted his mind: his dear Hyacinth falling on the ground.
"Hyacinth!"
He ran so fast he could easily compete with Hermes. He couldn't buy what just happened. Not Hyacinth, please! He knelt near him. His front bled abundantly. With delicateness, he took him in his arms. He made sure to not hurt him more. His eyes reflected worries and were locked on the gorgeous prince.
"Hyacinth, please! Are you hearing me?"
"Apollo… Why?" The Spartan responded with a weak voice.
No! No! No! No way! Apollo used all of his powers to heal him. He was the God of Medicine! It had to work! He couldn't lose him!
But he did. Hyacinth's eyes closed for the last time. His breathe disappeared forever. His blood stopped circulating once for all.
"NO!"
Why?! Just why?! Why he had to encourage Hyacinth in his arrogance?! Why did he let himself being controlled by his own ego?! Why he didn't control his own strength?! Why wasn't he strong enough to heal him?! Why did he wait before proposing him to be immortal?!
But no matter the answers to those questions, the result would remain the same.
Hyacinth was dead…because of him.
Apollo felt tears emerging from his eyelids. No one… No one else had loved him back before. Not Daphne, not Marpessa and many other failed romances. Not even Del… He quickly erased her from his mind. Only Hyacinth mattered. His only sincere love, lost forever to Hades…
No! He would not let this happen!
He used what remained of his strength. He recuperated the soul of his companion and transformed it. From his blood, a new flower appeared with purple petals assembled to form a cluster and long leaves growing from the ground.
Beautiful just like the soul it was born from…but still a new symbol of sadness.
Meanwhile, a bird had observed everything of it. And deciding that his master needed someone, he flew toward the sea.
…
Delphina was jumping out of the water with the dolphins. They just caught a lot of fish for their lunch and they wanted to celebrate their victory the way they usually do.
But she suddenly noticed a white bird flying above the sea. At first, she thought it had to be a seagull or something like that. But it came closer to her. She finally noticed that it didn't look like a sea bird at all. She stopped and waited.
And at the end, she recognized it. It was a raven!
What was it doing here? Apollo wanted to send her a message? But he would have used Hermes, not a raven. So what was the deal?
The raven finally arrived to her, screaming a lot while flying around her head.
"Please calm down, I am not understanding you!" She said.
It got it and spoke again slower this time. Delphina listened carefully.
"What?! Apollo has a boyfriend?"
It wasn't the fact to learn he was bisexual that surprised her. She already knew it. What shocked her was to realize how big the distance between them became to the point she totally didn't know what was going on in his life. But the raven talked again. And then, she heard the terrible news.
"What?"
No, it couldn't be… This story…reminded her terrible memories. Ho! No! And guilty assaulted her violently. No… She didn't learn her lesson after all.
She forgot everything about the incident involving Marsyas. Deep inside her, Apollo was still her friend… And he needed her.
She swam toward Delphi.
…
Apollo was in his private garden. A small green place with view on the valley where he always came to meditate. Just beside the laurel tree, he planted the flower.
His hyacinth.
Very delicate. Very beautiful. Very alive… But his beloved remained dead. No more he would hear his voice. No more he would share with him moments of complicity. The perfume of the flower would not replace the masculine smell of his body. The texture of the petals would not replace the softness of his skin.
This plant was the last thing left. Apollo would take care of it and make it reproduce and grow through Greece. In honor of the only one who had loved him back.
But it hurt. Ho! By Zeus, this pain was eating him inside like worms decomposing a corpse. Even Tartarus could not torture him like that.
And the worst was that it was entirely his fault.
Suddenly, he heard someone entering the garden. Angry, without turning, he screamed. "I ordered you to leave me alone!"
But the servant didn't leave. Furious like a storm, he turned to hit the suicidal subordinate… Then, he discovered it was not a servant at all.
"Delphina?" He whispered, completely shocked.
She was real. She was as beautiful as the last time he saw her. However, this time, instead of anger, he found worries on her face.
The Goddess of Dolphins was worried. Apollo looked so broken, so emotionally vulnerable. Last time she saw him in such a horrible state was when he got deeply rejected by Daphne… Yet, she guessed this time was far different.
This time, he watched her with coldness in his eyes.
"What are you doing here?" He asked her with venom in his tone.
It scared Delphina. She felt uncomfortable. What were you supposed to say to someone you have pushed away? Someone who was experimenting a deep trauma?
"Apollo… I'm sorry…"
"You are sorry? Ah! That's so funny!" He replied with sarcasm.
"Apollo, please. You know that I'm being honest."
"Ho! Of course! I perfectly know that! What makes me curious is how much you are sorry for me!"
Delphina made a step backward. She was truly afraid. Never Apollo had been so harsh toward her. She always naively believed she was immune to his hatred. But now, she doubted that. Even worse, she feared he would harm her.
He was very angry.
"So what?" He said. "You have nothing to say? Or are you just here to see how miserable I became?!"
"No, Apollo, I swear…"
"Shut up! You are avoiding me like the pest, deciding to never give me a second chance and now, you show up just because you feel compassion for me when I lost the light of my life? I needed to suffer that much for you to be willed to come to see me again?"
"I'm sorry, Apollo! I just want to help you!"
"And why would you do that? We are not friends anymore! You clearly told me that! You are probably just here because it is a part of your nature to help whoever you think needs you. Well, I have to tell you something. I don't need your help! Now leave me alone with my Hyacinth that I have lost forever!"
Delphina had the impression that her body had been pierced by a sword. Apollo's words murdered her heart… It saddened her to realise that she certainly deserved it.
No matter how wrong the god's actions could be, she hated to see him suffer so badly. She attempted to talk to him again.
"Apollo, I beg you. Listen to me…"
"Listening to you?! Like you have ever wanted to listen to me in the past! So, don't make me repeat: Get out!"
Delphina trembled. She tried one last time by reaching his arm.
"Apollo, please!"
"I said: GET OUT!"
And all of a sudden, he pushed Delphina so strongly that she fell on the floor. With her body hitting the ground, she couldn't hide her shock. It didn't hurt her that much but she still never expected Apollo to do this to her.
Apollo…
She turned her head. Apollo was ignoring her in order to concentrate his attention on the flower. This vision strangled her. She felt like her existence completely faded. Her spirit got lost.
Slowly and painfully, she got up and left. Emotions were invading her. But overall, she felt stupid. She once faced this situation before. The pain she saw in Apollo, she saw it in someone else's. And again, it was someone she had rejected…
Damn! Fates! What kind of game were they playing?
She ran. Far away from Delphi. Water were emerging from her eyes. Guilt haunted and pursued her continually.
She went back to the sea. She needed to go somewhere.
…
A long hour passed. Apollo stood alone in his garden, mourning and plunging into his depression…until he realised it was useless.
Hyacinth will never come back. No matter what. He could never repair his mistake. And he could not remain moping forever.
Sadly, he needed to move on. To let his lover go.
He didn't stop thinking of Delphina. How many days and how many nights did he pray for her to talk to him again like before? Hyacinth came to him in a time when a big part of his heart was empty. And now that he was dead, the emptiness returned.
Seeing Delphina during this delicate moment triggered his rage. He hated her for the pain she had caused. He hated her for still being nice enough to come back when he needed it the most. He hated her for tormenting his life so much.
He hated her because he still liked her.
And now, he just rejected her. What had he done? Regrets rained on his mind. He may have wasted his only chance to reconcile with her. Ashamed he felt when he thought about how he treated her.
He was the God of Reason. He had to take the right decision.
He looked once again at the flower. "I'm sorry, Hyacinth, my love. I promise to cherish your memory forever. Thank you for having been a part of my life… But I have to go."
…
Delphina knelt on the sand on a beach at Iasos. It was sunny. It was desert, silent like a sanctuary. Delphina watched two steles. She didn't come here since a long time. She had learnt to move on. But today, the story had repeated. The only difference was that Apollo was immortal. That led to a different ending. She would not be able to say if it was a better one or not.
But standing here in front of a piece of her past, she experimented a serious meditation and reflection about the last events. Tears wetted her cheeks. Her throat felt tight. Demons returned to haunt her and hurt her mentally. She couldn't get Apollo's words out of her head. She felt like a failure.
"I'm sorry." She said to the two deceased ones whose cinders rested here. "I don't know what is right and what is wrong anymore. I wish it was simpler so maybe my moral would stop to be such a weight on me."
"Who are you talking to?" She heard.
She jumped. She thought she was completely alone. She wasn't. She turned to see Apollo, standing there. Her heart beat fast. How did he get so close without her hearing anything? No, the real question was: what was he doing here after what happened just one hour ago?
"I know what you are thinking." He said. "But first, answer my question."
His tone sounded nice. He probably came to apologize. She felt reassured but trapped as well. There were some secrets she kept for herself. She didn't like to share them and that was one of the reasons she rarely came here.
But she believed it was probably the best occasion to speak about it.
"You know I had a life before you were born." She said. "When I began my new vocation as the Mother of Dolphins, I got very high expectations. I wanted to be perfect and I required perfection from my children."
Apollo didn't answer. He waited for her to continue.
"One day, one of my dolphins harassed severely a congener to the point he physically and seriously hurt him. This attitude shocked me enormously. I wanted all the dolphins to be an example of kindness and compassion. I couldn't forgive this. And so, I punished the offender by banishing him from the pod. I was so angry. However, dolphins possess the reputation to be very sociable creatures. They don't bear loneliness very well. So, you can understand that he went into a deep depression."
Apollo still said nothing. But Delphina knew he was smart enough to notice the parallels with a more familiar story.
"Thankfully, he didn't remain alone for a long time." She pursued. "He met a young boy. His name was Hermias. Quickly, they became very close. They always swam together every single day. Hermias confessed all his secrets to his friend who always listened attentively. A strong friendship was born."
And then, she arrived to the hardest part.
"Hermias wasn't that much a good swimmer. He always held the fin of his friend during his travels at the sea. But someday, tragedy stroke… Hermias fell and drowned, obviously dying in the process. The dolphin didn't succeed to save him. He felt responsible for his death."
Apollo's face suddenly went from serious to sad. Yes, he could totally relate to this feeling.
"I found him on the shore, beside the dead body of his friend. I came as soon I heard his cry. He was lying down on the sand, dehydrating, mourning the death of his dear companion. The view made me heartbroken. I took pity on him and offered to join the pod again. But he declined. Instead, he begged me to let him die here beside his beloved friend. I couldn't deny him his last wish. And now, their cinders rest here."
She was finished. Now, only the sound of the waves occupied the place. Delphina was so unsure about her feelings. And she didn't know how Apollo would react. The similarities between both stories were too obvious to not provoke a reaction.
"I'm sorry." He finally said. "I should have never talked to you the way I did. And I also pushed you. It was so unkind from me when you were only trying to help."
"It's ok. You are forgiven. I'm sorry as well. It has been such a long time since the incident with Marsyas. You have done nothing wrong since. I should have been more willed to talk to you again, consequently. I was too stubborn. But I still care for you."
"Of course or else, you would not have come when I needed you the most."
"Did you… Did you care that much for this young man?"
Apollo lowered his head. The goddess prayed that her question didn't hit some sensible strings. Was it even her place to ask such a thing?
She decided to apologise but Apollo already spoke. "There are no words to describe what I experimented with Hyacinth… I loved him so much. I don't think I will ever forgive myself for his death. He will always remain a part of my heart… But contrary to your dolphin, I need to move on. Will you help me, please?"
She smiled. "Of course, I will."
Her heart felt warm again. She couldn't explain it. No, in fact, she could. It was just more embarrassing to admit it than she wanted it to be. But, she knew what kind of sentiment it was.
"Apollo, can you keep a secret?" She asked.
"Of course, what is it?"
"I missed you."
He laughed. Delphina preferred so much to see him like this than sad.
"Can I tell you something?" He asked.
"Of course, what is it?"
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"Nothing. Just thank you."
Delphina understood. She perfectly knew him. And she was glad they had reconciled.
She came closer to him. "I'm a little tired. Can we go back to Delphi? Also, I would like to help you to build a monument to commemorate the memory of your lover. He deserves no less for the happiness he gave you for such a short time."
"It would be lovely. Thank you."
And together they went back to a place they could both call home. And after a darker day, the sun finally set with a brighter light.
Thank you for reading!
First, I know that the most famous version of this myth is the one where Zephyr uses the wind to deviate the discus and kill Hyacinth in the process by jealousy. I chose the other version just because it would be more interesting for the character development. I did some small changes just to make the writting easier.
The myth of Hermias and the dolphin is a real one. I just added some elements. I loved the similarities between the myths. And if you know greek mythology very well, you may have also noticed the similarities with the story of Cyparissus, another male lover of Apollo (not going to be depicted in this fanfic).
I hope you enjoyed it. Now, the conflict is resolved, but more troubles are coming for these two. For the moment, your hint for the next chapter is: Lyre.
See you soon!