Note: The italicized words toward the end are Haley reading Nathan's letter.
Chapter 13: A Tree Hill Raven knows that a person sometimes needs a little kick-start; the emotions will come naturally.
A week had gone by since Thanksgiving break ended and Tree Hill Prep was bustling with students. As December began, the school had been decorated in festive colors: white lights here, tinsel there, a Christmas tree and menorah placed in the dining hall. The only problem was that Haley James was far from in the Christmas spirit. By now she'd be donning her room with rainbow Christmas lights, setting up a little tree, maybe even putting a poinsettia here or there. She just couldn't get enough of that bright red color! But alas, this year she hadn't even thought about putting up anything festive. All she could do was stress and it was due to one boy and one tightly sealed envelope always tucked into her back pocket.
The night during Thanksgiving break that Nathan had come up to her room and they ended up laying next to each other, sleeping and listening to each other's heart beat, had been a week and a half ago. And since then, it'd been the battle of avoidance. Nathan had awoke that morning in Haley's room but without any Haley. He checked the swing, and the Dining Hall and the library, but then he realized she wouldn't be anywhere that she'd want to be found.
Crushed by Haley avoidance, Nathan went back to his room and from them on they'd been avoiding each other, only interacting when needed, thank god etiquette classes had been personal ones lately rather than partnered ones, and giving each other space. As much as it pained Nathan he knew not to push or pry Haley because it could only end up hurting him. He knew she had feelings for him; it was obvious in their touch. Yet for some reason she's holding back and there's one thing he knows about Haley James, and it's that she's stubborn. She won't budge until she wants to, so it's not use forcing it.
So, that brings us to where we are now. Haley has yet to read the letter, and Nathan has been standing in the shadows of her life, hoping and praying that she'll open it. But until she does, he couldn't be near her. It hurt too much. He's never had such a strong connection to someone before. A connection far beyond friendship, something he could do no longer. He couldn't be her friend anymore; he had to be her boyfriend.
Haley walked across the campus that morning ready for a nice hot breakfast, and hoping that Nathan wouldn't be there. Sure enough, his shoulder brushed past hers about midway down the path that cuts through the campus. Haley looked up to see the owner of this broad shoulder, though she knew immediately who it was, and willed herself to move on rather than let him throw her into a nice strong hug. Once she got into the dining hall, she piled her tray with waffles, bacon, and scrambled eggs, then made her way over to the table where Brooke, Peyton, Jake, and Lucas were all sitting together chatting.
Taking a seat next to Brooke, Haley began to chow down, attempting not to notice the silent stares from all of them. Finally, deciding that she did not want them all to think she was a complete pig, who just shovels their face, Haley looked up, being met with four pairs of eyes.
"What?" She asked, the slightest bit of syrup shining on her lip.
"Haley, how long is this going to go on?" Peyton questioned.
"Well, if I eat like I normally do, then I'd say another five minutes."
"You know that not what I meant," Peyton retorted.
"Oh, huh. Then I have no idea what you're speaking of," Haley replied, taking a bit out of a piece of bacon.
"You and Nathan, Haley." Lucas finally stated, his voice surprising her.
"Well Lucas, considering there is no me and Nathan there really isn't anything to go on about," she huffed.
"Haley, please. Stop with all this bull," Brooke snapped. "We all know you like Nathan McHotty. I just don't understand why you won't give him a chance yet. But seriously, you've got to do something. This whole avoidance-tension thing is wearing on all of us."
"I don't like Nathan. If I did I'd tell you. And have I told any of you?" Haley accused, her eyes cutting to Jake, willing him into silence.
"Well I guess not," Brooke huffed. "But sometimes people can see what others cannot. And all of us… see what you can't. But whatever, fine. You don't want to fess up to it, but at least don't bring us all down with you. I mean, I'm not trying to rip into you Haley. I'm not but I don't think we've had a full table for any meals other than formal dinner in almost two weeks. And when either of you are here, it's like stepping on egg shells to not mention the other around you."
"I see…" Haley stated, her eyebrows ruffling at the middle, looking at everyone's face. "Is this what all of you think?"
"Basically…" Lucas let out quietly, everyone else nodding his or her head in consensus.
"Well I'm sorry for ruining everyone's dining," Haley huffed annoyed, standing up from her spot. "But I guess I'm just a whiney loser who can't deal with her problems so you're all just going to have to forgive me with the tension I've caused. But I really don't see it going anywhere soon so, don't worry about stepping on eggshells. They've all already been cracked. I've got to go."
"Haley wait! That's not what we meant!" Jake called after her retreating figure.
"Damn," Lucas breathed under his breath. "She as stubborn as Nathan."
"Yep," Peyton replied. "And if they don't get together soon, we're having an intervention. This is nonsense."
"I couldn't agree more."
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After her encounter in the dining hall, the last place Haley wanted to be was in her room where she'd inevitably come in contact with Brooke and Peyton. She would have gone down to the swing, but that would inevitably lead to an encounter with Nathan. Something she also didn't want. So, after racking her brain for a place she could be alone, a spot dawned on her.
Walking down the grassy hill, Haley went around the back of the water shed to the other side where she found the row of old canoes. She plopped herself down on the edge sand, just where it meets the grass' end. Lifting up the edge of the canoe, she instinctively found the metal box Jake had shown her. Opening it up, she bypassed the alcohol and dared herself to take a Twinkie. After all, she was a growing girl who did not get to finish her breakfast, and the shelf life of a Twinkie is like forever.
Taking her chances, Haley grabbed Twinkie then put the box away. Before she opened it up though, she took the letter out of her back pocket and placed it on her jean-clad leg. After all, that is the reason she's caused all this drama. Her friends are getting fed up with her and Nathan's antics, he was ignoring her and vice versa, and in this time of joy and holiday spirit, all Haley could do was stress.
Opening up the Twinkie and taking a bit out of it, Haley continued to look down at the letter. It was just sitting there, mocking her. Nathan's handwriting splashed across the front after having written her name. To think that she was so scared of an inanimate object. The funny part actually, was the fact that she didn't even know what it contained. It could be as simple as "Happy Thanksgiving," but deep down she hoped for something so much more. Something worth all the turmoil she has caused herself.
Haley continued to shove the Twinkie in her mouth while staring at the letter. She dared herself to open it, and yet the same time she held back. That however, was soon about to change.
"I see you found our secret stash," a deep voice called from behind her. Her back went rigid. Her mouth, stuffed with Twinkie, hung open. How in the heck did he find her. And why, oh why, had he come looking.
"Seems like I have," Haley stated flatly, her mouth still hanging open as she turned around to see Nathan's tall figure. His hair a bit ruffled, but hot nonetheless.
"You might want to finish that bite before it drops right onto that favored poncho of yours. Wouldn't want anything to happen to that now would we?" Nathan questioned before taking a seat next to Haley in the sand. His legs stretching out in front of him, going a good foot past Haley's.
"Yeah, I guess I should," Haley replied, letting the slightest giggle pass her lips. Several long moments passed before either of them talked. "So uh, why'd you come down here Nathan?"
"Honestly?"
"Yeah."
"Well, I saw you walking down here and it seemed kind of odd. I wanted to make sure you were okay," he stated truthfully.
"Oh… well then… thanks. I'm okay." Haley stated shyly.
"Are you Haley?"
"Yes I'm fine. Don't I look fine?"
"Not really," Nathan stated, his eyes boring into the side of her face.
"Thanks," Haley huffed, glancing down at her twiddling fingers before realizing that his letter was openly sitting in her lap.
"No, that's not what I meant. Lately you've seemed really tired and stressed. And, you never used to be. And I think it's because of… of me," he finally replied sheepishly.
"Well that's a bit arrogant. Not everything I do is because of you Nathan," Haley retorted.
"But I'm right aren't I?"
"I didn't say that?"
"And yet you're here, in this desolate area, with my letter sitting in your lap as you stare down at it. I think it's pretty safe to say what's got you all riled up. Why don't you just do us both a favor and open it Haley?" Nathan stated.
"It's not that easy Nathan."
"Yes it is Haley. Just undo the seal and-"
"I'm aware of how to open a letter Nathan. It's what's inside that scares me."
"Don't be scared."
"But I am."
"Then trust me Haley. Trust me."
"You really want me to read it?"
"Yes."
"Fine. I'll read it-"
"Great!" Nathan cheered quietly, a smile splashing his face.
"-out loud with you," Haley finished, Nathan's smile quickly diminishing.
"Oh, no no. You can't do that," he stated nervously, getting embarrassed.
"It's either read it aloud with you or don't read it at all," Haley stated sternly.
"Fine, read it," he replied, gulping for air.
"Fine, I will," Haley stated triumphantly before ripping it open. Unfolding the paper, she began to read nervously. "Dear Haley, Happy Thanksgiving."
"Keep going," Nathan pleaded, getting antsy.
"Last night I tried to get you outside so I could tell you this but I wasn't successful, so here I am writing you a letter."
"You tried to get to me before you left for Thanksgiving?" Haley questioned, unaware.
"Yeah, didn't Rachel tell you? She saw me from your window, I just figured you were trying to ignore me."
"No, she didn't tell me," Haley huffed. "But that explains why she wanted to watch a movie with me that night. Bitch… Anyway, back to reading your letter. I know we kind of started off on a weird foot. I was a bit arrogant, you were a bit sarcastic, but we mesh well. And I know you've heard the stories. I'm sorry my reputation precedes me, but I'm really not like that. I know people like Rachel or maybe even Brooke with her big mouth have told you otherwise, but I'm different…"
"Uh, keep going," Nathan said, clearing his throat.
"You can either choose to believe me, or not believe me, but because of you I'm different. I know we've only known each other for what, almost four months, but you've changed me Haley James… for the better. I try to be a nice guy, and really the only time I'm not is when I'm trying to get you riled up because I love seeing the blush creep across you face…"
"Ass," Haley muttered, the faintest smile on her face, before she continued. "I like being around you, I like being with you, and I like those little moments when I get to share the faintest touch. The brushing of our hands, the hitting of our feet, the kissing of your head, all make me tingle, and it's all because of you."
"Nathan…" Haley replied blushing.
"Just keep reading Haley. I'm about to freaking burst over here!"
"I like the way I feel when I'm with you. I know we have a connection, and I know you know it too. So please, give me a chance. I've never had feelings like this for someone before. I mean, in the past girls have come to me. I've never, you know, wanted to stay with someone, but with you, I never want to go away. I like you. I mean, really like you. And if you just trust me… trust us. We'll be okay. I promise Haley. So please, throw me a bone… give me a chance. Trust me."
As she turned to face Nathan after finishing reading it, he could see the emotion etched into her face. The tears threatening to spill over her eyes as she leaned in to give him a hug.
"That was beautiful," she choked out.
"It was true," he stated nervously, his stomach flopping over and over.
"I could tell," Haley stated, looking out at the lake, then down at her hands that were now in her lap.
"Well uh.. what do you thi-"
"I have to go," Haley said hastily before getting up.
"What?" Nathan replied, totally confused.
"I have to go," she said again before turning to go, leaving a dumbfounded Nathan Scott in her wake.
"Haley, you can't just-"
"I have to go!" She shouted as she continued at a quick pace around the shed and back up the hill toward her dorm. It was then and only then that she allowed the tears to fall. Not out of sadness, but joy and comfort. No one had ever said such a thing about plain old Haley James. The last thing she had to do was just let him in. But could she do that? Let Nathan Scott in… she hoped so. And even more, he hoped so too.
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I'm pretty much an evil villan? I know, I know I'm sorry! It seems like I've been leaving every chapter of this story and my other one of cliffhangers lately... sorry! But at least you got to hear the letter. :) I hope it lived up to your standards! Anyways, next chapter we'll see if Haley will let him in... cross your fingers! Until next time... peace love & One Tree Hill!