Chapter Twelve

Despite being so high in the castle, as the night time began to glow and sing, Starfire could feel and hear the vibration of the characteristic bag pipes and drums the Tamaraneans played during important moments. She felt goosebumps collect along her skin as she was reminded of the scene of her parents walking towards battle, the music blaring on either side of them as they lead their people towards conquest, but ultimately, not glory. Starfire had been so fearful. And she remembered as the drums beat against her skull, a brief moment where her mother turned around and blew her kiss, before disappearing, never to see Starfire again. It was all becoming so real for Starfire. Wildfire was gone. Blackfire, too. And now the weight of Tamaran was falling upon her shoulders. Her stomach churned inside of her and her head hurt fiercely. Everyone she ever loved was not there any longer. And she realized after tonight, she may never see the Teen Titans again.

Her heart was beating rapidly in her chest as she entered the cool night of her balcony. Tenderly, her hands gripped the chilly marble balustrade and she gazed far down onto the city, watching the trickling lines of her citizens, holding waxy candles, march towards the castle. What was running through all of their minds, she wondered. Did they believe in her? Did they think this was for the best? Starfire returned to her room, slumping on an ottoman. Her dress furled around her and Starfire took in a deep breath. She didn't know what she was feeling. Overwhelmed, simply put. But what was everything inside of her trying to say? She missed her friends and her mind was cluttered with thoughts of Robin. She could see all their memories together, flashing by. She blinked rapidly as her eyes misted. What was it about Robin that enchanted her so much? Behind her eyes, she saw him standing before her, offering his hand out with that soft smile. All the times she had been spiraling out of the air, only to fall into his tense, protective arms. She could hear the rasp in his voice as he called her name out, pumping his arms as he fought to catch up to her. Starfire hugged herself, her nails digging into the shimmering fabric of the foreign dress.

Nobody had ever cared so much for her, she decided. Of course her parents and Galfore had lifted her head up, but part of Starfire saw it as an obligation on their part. Robin cared for her right out of the gate. He never hesitated and he never turned his back on her. Just like all of the Teen Titans. And now she couldn't help but feel like she was turning away from them, ejecting all of them from her life as if they were only placeholders until the right moment. Life wasn't a very fairytale, though, as much as she wanted to believe it was. Tamaran was a testament to that. The flora and fauna that once grew wildly and inhibited, sparkling in colors of purples, pinks, and oranges, had been completely eradicated, as if it had never been there. All good things had to come to an end. Life was continuously proving that to Starfire, over and over again in a destructive cycle that weighed heavily on her optimistic nature. Maybe one day, she thought, she'd find herself reigning peace over her home planet. Maybe life would make sense again. Maybe she'd get to see her friends succeeding and thriving in all their goals and accomplishments. But that seemed so faraway. Almost unobtainable, not tangible in the least. She rubbed at her rosy cheeks, willing her mind to stop playing all the memories, but they continued to flood through her, snapping heart string after heart string.

"Seventh place, Star!" Beast Boy cheered, leaping up and down on the couch. It made Starfire grin as she fumbled with the clunky controller in her hand. "That's not last place. You got this!"

"I saw this at the bookstore," Raven told her as she passed Starfire in the kitchen who was heavily inspecting a whisk. Raven reached into the bag dangling from her arm, sliding a hardbound book across the counter that gleamed in the afternoon light flowing into the living room. "It's a cookbook. I bet there's all kinds of foods in there you haven't heard of that you could easily make."

"Alright, new record!" Cyborg hooted, leaping from the bench press. Hurriedly, he crossed the gym, replacing Robin's 350lb record with his new 475lb. "I wanna see Robin beat this. Oh, he's going to be so mad. I can't wait to see his face!" Curiously, Starfire approached the bench and added a bit more weight. She laid down and Cyborg watched with great curiosity as, without effort, Starfire raised and lowered the bar from her collarbone over and over again. She giggled as she sat up, pressing her palms flat to the leather bench. Sheepishly, Cyborg rubbed the nape of his neck. "Alright, Star. You win." He then turned and scribbled her name on the white board, writing 685lb at the end.

The full moon glowed over Starfire as she sat on the roof, hugging her knees. It was always disappointing that Tamaran couldn't be seen from the earth's surface. It was somewhere out there, lost among the clusters of stars. She had a hard time knowing which direction to face. But the moon greeted her kindly with its milky light. "It must be hard being so far away from your home," Robin said from beside her. His legs dangled off the edge of the tower and he sat back on his hands. "Your family is all the up there. But we care for you, just like they do." Robin offered his soft, small smile to Starfire and her fingers fidgeted on her knees. "I want you to know I'll always care about you, Starfire. And I'll always be by your side. We all will."

A prompt knock on Starfire's door tore her from her thoughts and she rose quickly, rubbing fiercely at the falling tears. She walked towards the balcony, inhaling the dry scent that did not remind her of home, but instead the lonely, broken feeling that plagued her heart. After a moment, Yalfore saw himself in, holding her flute glass, one hand poised behind his back. "Why, Princess Koriand'r, you're looking marvelous this evening." Slowly, the young girl turned towards him, operating like a robot on stiff hinges. She folded her hands in front of her, tightly gripping at the A-line skirt. A sweat was breaking out beneath her head piece. "The spitting image of your mother on the day of her coronation, truly. I am certain she would have loved to be here for this."

She didn't know what to say. As she looked at Yalfore, she tried to mask any feelings of uncertainty she was beginning to harbor towards him. It wasn't fair to do so, Starfire told herself. She wanted to believe the best in everyone. She wanted to desperately believe Yalfore was only swamped with the task of re-imagining the Tamaranean throne and its broken people. Starfire managed to pull a polite smile to her face as Yalfore joined her on the balcony. Briskly, he walked past her, coming to stand at the railing and watch the procession of citizens cycle towards the castle. Starfire came to stand beside him. It was a beautiful sight from so up high. It was like a line of fireflies orderly making their way together in unison, their waxy candles bobbing with each step.

"The kingdom is anxious. I can feel it," Yalfore said, keeping his dark eyes directed down. "I am sure you can, too, my sweet little Koriand'r. Tonight, you will shed the image of only a princess and become someone these people can rely on. You will be more than just a Grand Ruler, but a guardian, instead. Tamaran has been soiled in darkness for far too long. You are the long awaited light they have begged and prayed for." Yalfore turned towards her, smiling gently. He was wearing a black robe, the hems embellished with bright gold ribbons. It was the ceremonial garbs for all important events, from coronation to the birth of heirs. Starfire remembered Galfore sporting it quite differently in his robust stature. "Before all is said and done and power rightfully relinquished to you, I wanted to speak a piece of respect. It has only been a short time since you were beckoned back, Koriand'r, and put to the task of molding to prepare for the throne. I understand things have been tumultuous and perhaps not quite what anyone envisioned. For that, I apologize. No one of your status should ever be made to believe they are inferior or do not know what is best. I speak from my soul, from my adoration, and duty to protect you, that I have only wanted what was best for you. Perhaps your friends were a light in your heart. But as Grand Ruler, you will learn, you cannot always lead with your heart. In just mere hours, this entire planet will be yours, and only yours. You will come to learn that there is not much room left in a leaders heart when they must think of their people. Your friends will always remember you, as you will, as well. But you were born differently. You were born special. And you must never take that for granted, Princess Koriand'r."

Starfire's pleated braid waved in the wind behind her as she turned her large emerald eyes back towards her flocking people. She understood what Yalfore was saying all too well. His poetic, precise, and calculating way of telling her it was time to let go. The day had finally come. Starfire wanted to be a Teen Titan for the rest of her life, but again, her fate, her inadvertent destiny, stood in the way of her true desires. Starfire did not want to be selfish. As she donned the clothes that made her a leader, she was effectively shedding everything that at once had defined her as simply 'Starfire'. Never again would she hear someone speak her name in English. She wouldn't see the blue waves of the earth's oceans. She'd have to give up her endeavors of learning to cook human foods. She'd never fly as free as a bird beneath a cerulean sky. It was her own fault, she told herself. Starfire had done nothing but deny her origins. She had tried to run away. Starfire blamed herself for the way Tamaran had turned out.

"I know you must be overwhelmed," Yalfore continued. Starfire looked back to him. "I will assure you every Grand Ruler spends the first few days stewing in the sudden changes, muddled by their emotions of what has been altered. But have faith in yourself, sweet Koriand'r. I have faith in you. Your parents will be smiling on you as you finish the coronation and complete the hoop of your family's legacy that has always kept Tamaran above the flames. A toast to you. I bring you not just a drink of digestion, but a glass of honor."

Starfire, Yalfore's poisoning you... you can't let Yalfore serve you anything anymore... I don't know what to say, but Robin is in trouble... Do you believe me?

This is my destiny, friends...

Gingerly, Starfire accepted the fizzy drink, hopeful it would help subside the nasty headache and stomach cramps. Starfire turned to watch her people and tilted her back. Yalfore grinned as he watched the drink fall into her mouth. "All will be well, Koriand'r," Yalfore told her, paternally setting a hand to her shoulder. Starfire was so wound up, in so much physical and mental pain, that she did not feel the small chip that Yalfore pressed into her exposed shoulder blade.

...

Down below, drums beat and bag pipes rang out. The streets were dark, but flooded with candlelight, as every citizen of Tamaran made their way to the castle. Robin had his back pressed against the wall length windows, watching the flocks go by. Their room was lowly lit, too, as Raven sat on the foot of her bed, trying to find a semblance of meditation. Beast Boy and Cyborg slouched at the table as each moment passed by them. In Robin's hand dangled his communicator. How desperately he wanted to press the transmission button to beckon Starfire's voice to him. Instead, he only gripped the damned device tightly. The leader of the Teen Titans felt out of space and time completely. The past few days of his life simply didn't exist. After he had woken up, surprised to be in their accommodations, and had been brought back up to speed by his teammates, Robin realized how much he had missed out on. Though it had been less than a week on Tamaran, it was beginning to feel like a lifetime. Robin was quite sore, but was extremely surprised when he looked into the mirror and saw a normal, clear complexion looking back at him. They had easily masked the hate and the abuse they exuded on the kingdom, but they certainly couldn't dispel the memories of Robin's experience. Still, the young man didn't regret a thing. He'd take the beatings again and again if it meant finding any shred of evidence to protect Starfire. The only problem was, though, if any of those sacrifices could save her. He refused to believe she was too far gone. He'd die saving her and it would be well worth it. But would the moment ever arise? Could they stop the domino effect in motion? It was all a race against time before that final block came down and sealed hers, and the Teen Titans, fates in stone.

"Man, I'm starting to think they 'conveniently' forgot us," Beast Boy huffed from the table where he cradled his head in his hand. "They're definitely trying to make us odd ones out... we don't even have any of those fancy candles!"

"The new moon hasn't completely risen yet," Raven told him. "We'll be the last guests since you know... we're the alien anarchists."

"Freedom fighters," Cyborg offered instead. "It sucks, BB, but we're the bad guys to them."

"But-" Beast Boy began to interject.

"No one is the bad guy in their own story," came Robin's even and stoic voice. He did not look to any of his team, his eyes focused on the continued floods of citizens below. The music that bellowed over the kingdom gave him goosebumps. It was the same music played as Starfire was marched down the aisle towards a different doom. It filled him with anger and sorrow for her. Robin hadn't spoken much when he had woken up. Just his typical questions, getting straight down to business. He had stewed the entire evening, antsy and riled up. Finally, he tore his eyes away from the scene, looking around their dark room. "Yalfore is his own glorified hero."

"But he is a bad guy," Beast Boy insisted, turning to Robin. "Good guys don't get rid of opposer's in secrecy and force people into dormant fear. That sounds like a bad guy to me, Robin."

"Yeah, well, he doesn't see it that way," Robin shook his head, his jaw muscles tense. "He sees it as public safety."

"And we're just going to accept that?" Beast Boy folded his arms over his chest. He didn't like Robin's tone. It made him uneasy.

"Our hands are tied," Robin heaved a sigh, still pressed up against the window. "At the coronation, we'll have a ninety-second window to turn the tides. And honestly..." He looked between each one of his friends, his stomach twisting up inside of him. "It's going to be do or die."

"What's our plan?" Raven asked, her face pensive.

"I overheard the guards talk through the logistics of the coronation," Robin sat forward, his hands curling into fists. "The first part of the ceremony sounds like a cocktail party. People socialize, have some drinks... that's our chance to connect with Nelda and the underground resistance. It will be the least suspicious, anyway. I wouldn't doubt the guards don't take their eyes off us for a moment. But they can't do a thing if we're just mingling. We have to decide on our action right then and there. There won't be time to argue or contemplate. Yalfore and the council then will do some kind of tradition of lighting several candles. After that is when Starfire will be brought into the chambers. She will take a solemn oath before the new moon and swear her duty. I'm not entirely sure what that entails, but I am thinking something will have to happen then... before she says the last words and promises herself to be Grand Ruler, we're going to have to object."

Cyborg sighed, shaking his head. "I hate everything about this plan. We're going in completely blind. We don't even know who we're up against or when."

"Yeah, well..." Robin again looked out the window. "It's our last chance before we... I fail Starfire..."

"Dude," Beast Boy's ears slouched just a bit. "This isn't all on you. This can't be all your fault."

"I've been an idiot since we've gotten here," Robin's brow tightened together. "I've put you all into the line of fire, made you public enemies, for my own selfish reasons. I just couldn't deal with the fact that the Teen Titans wouldn't be whole. If there's not five then there is no team. There's no replacing Starfire or any of you for that matter. I got carried away, though. Everything is my fault. We wouldn't be in so deep if it wasn't for me."

Beast Boy glanced between the quiet Cyborg and Raven before he peeled himself off his stool, sinking onto the floor beside Robin. "Dude, I know you're not going to say it, so I will. You love Starfire. In a way different than how you love us. And we understand. You've seen what love has done to all of us before."

Robin looked to Beast Boy with a face of stone. It was hard to gauge how the young man was feeling in that moment. Robin kept his palms planted to the ground to avoid any sight of them shaking. His friend's green eyes were gleaming in the starlight coming through the window, his face as equally intense, but still offering a comfort that was a characteristic charm of Beast Boy's. He was right and Robin knew it. The leader again watched the waves of candles bob by in the night. He could not, would not, give up on Starfire. Robin would never let a planet, alien tradition, lasting legacies- what have you- stop him from being at her side. He had made that promise to her once before, Robin could not back down on his words. For once in his life, he craved to eat pancakes loaded up with sugar, sporting weird lumps that could have been chunks of pineapples that were not skinned; a bottle of mustard gleaming on the table beside the rather sketchy breakfast. He wanted to see Starfire on a warm summer day, basking in the grass of the park that she said tickled, as nearby, Cyborg and Beast Boy played football. Robin would do anything to see Starfire's clear complexion lit up beneath a full moon as she swung her legs back and forth beside him, telling him about all the unknown parts of space humankind would never find out about.

Robin pursed his lips. "Again, I'm sorry."

There came a hefty bang on the door and each Titan hunched their shoulders in surprise. Raven was cool and collected as she pulled herself to her feet. She opened the door, greeted by a wall of soldiers, each holding a candle. So many guards, it was unnecessary. Robin felt his face twisting in disgust as he looked at the soldiers. They may have simply been following orders, but where did they draw their own morals in the sand? Each young person stood, approaching the stoic and unmoving men. In sharp unison, tall, waxy candles were handed to them, swiftly lit in the next moment. Raven looked to Cyborg, the orange flame licking up her curved cheek. Cyborg looked to Beast Boy, whose chrome was brightly illuminated. Beast Boy then looked to Robin, his pensive look not unyielding in the low light. The leaders face, though, was obscured in shadows, an anger unraveling in his stomach, unlike any force of emotions he had ever felt. The moment Robin's shoes made contact with the dark cobblestone paths of Tamaran, he didn't know how he would contain himself. He had to think bigger than just himself. But it was hard, as he held the candle in front of him, marching alongside his friends as if it were a funeral procession. Robin refused to mourn for Starfire. He refused to let her slip through his grip.

Robin glanced to the sea of bobbing Tamaranean heads surrounding him. Where did they stand? What did their hearts want? Was the tall, slender girl with auburn hair beside him a staunch believer in Yalfore's agenda? Was the small, stocky man behind him an oppressed freedom fighter? Who around the team would stand up for what they believed in, what they thought was right, without the fear of being condemned to the royal prison? As the large and angular castle began to loom over them, Robin felt his heartbeat accelerate. What would the scene look like come the first mornings light? Would Starfire be a regretful Grand Ruler? Or would the Teen Titans bring it all crashing down, fashionably and rightfully?

Robin's hands constricted around the waxy candle, uncaring if he broke it, as his eyes gazed towards the lit balcony high above. There was a slender figure up there, looking towards the magnificent crowd. Robin bit down on his lip so hard, he tasted copper. Starfire, can't you see what's happening? These may be your people, your blood, but they don't always know what's best for you. Just because they're family doesn't mean they won't harm you. Starfire, please...

The words, of course, did not reach the soon-to-be Grand Rulers ears. But they echoed through the mind of the young sorceress beside him, whose onyx eyes glanced to him. Maybe they could put this all to an end. But would Robin be one of the last ones standing, too?