South Park. A quiet mountain town in Colorado. It is a peaceful town…for the most part. A place where the adults are stupid and the children save the day. Sometimes. A place where a kid in an orange coat dies almost daily and no one seems to notice. A place where celebrites have turned into giant monsters and waged war. A place where aliens land and accidentally kill cows by accident. Well, maybe it isn't so quiet after all.

The focus on this story is on four boys who often find themselves in the middle of this craziness. It is also often them who solve the situations, sometimes without even knowing it. Their names were Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman, and Kenny McCormick. Today, at their school, their lives would be thrown for another loop.

"Hey, dude," Kyle greeted his best friend Stan in the hallway.

"Oh, hey, Kyle," Stan greeted back. Out of the 4 friends, Stan and Kyle had the closest bond, almost like brothers. "So, did you finish last night's math homework?"

"I could barely stay awake. I don't care if she's a teacher, but Mrs. Garrison is a fucking slave driver."

"50 pages? Oh yeah," Stan agreed.

Kenny arrived and gave a muffled greeting.

"Hey, Kenny," Kyle said. Unfortunately, Cartman approached them.

"Hello, pussy, Jew, poor-kid," Cartman 'greeted' them. Cartman was sorta a friend to them, even though they hated him.

"Shut the hell up, Cartman!" Kyle snapped.

"Oh, the Jew has a temper," Cartman said mockingly. "So, guys, I need help with the homework…"

"We are not letting you copy off us, fat ass!" Kyle snapped.

"Screw you, you stupid Jew!"

"Guys, let's not fight so early in the morning," Stan groaned. Kenny gave a muffled agreement.

"Well, whatever, I'm going," Cartman said as he walked to class.

"God damn it I hate him," Kyle said.

"Unfortunately, he is our friend, Kyle," Stan said depressingly.

"Why do we even hang out with him?" Kyle asked. "He just ribs on me for being Jewish and Kenny for being poor."

Kenny mumbled a 'yeah' sound.

"So, what do we do? Replace him? He's gonna weasel his way back in again anyway," Stan said.

"There has to be someone better," Kyle said.

In class, all the kids sat down. Stan waved at Wendy who winked at him. Ever since the 'List' incident, they had since reconciled. Bebe was still at juvenile hall. When Kyle sat down, he yelped. Checking his butt, he found that he'd sat on a tack. Cartman began to laugh uncontrollably.

"Damn it, Cartman!" Kyle snapped.

"God damn, Kyle, you are so stupid!" Cartman said in his laughter. Kyle wanted so much to stranger his fat 'friend'. The temptation was too great.

As Mrs. Garrison entered the classroom, she began her announcement, "Alright, class, today we have a new student joining us. Please, make him feel welcomed and try not to drive him away like the others." When she finished, a new boy came in.

"Hello," he said, waving. He was Asian, with short spiky black hair and a blue and thick Chinese shirt with matching baggy pants. He wore sandals on his feet. "I'm Kyo. Nice to meet you."

"Well, let's see here," Mrs. Garrison looked around. "How about a seat next to Eric."

"Thank you," the boy said before heading over to the seat.

Kyo walked over to the empty seat and sat down. Mrs. Garrison then walked to the board and began her lesson. As she was talking, Cartman kept glancing at the new kid for some reason.

"Hey, kid," Cartman whispered. Kyo looked to his neighbor. "You know math, right?"

"A little," Kyo shrugged. "Why?"

"I need help," Cartman replied as he showed his math homework which wasn't finished. "You can do these, right?"

"Not here!" Kyo frowned. "I'd need hours to finish that!"

"Oh come on, you can do it!" Cartman frowned.

"No I can't!" Kyo insisted.

"You're a Jap and Japs are really good at math!" Cartman insisted.

WHAP!

"Ow!" Cartman cried. Kyo had whacked him in the back of the head. "What the hell was that for!?"

"You called me a racist name," Kyo frowned. "That lets me hit you."

"Everyone calls you guys Japs!" Cartman frowned.

WHAP!

"Ow!" Cartman cried. "Would you stop doing that?!"

"Stop calling me racist names and I will!" Kyo retorted.

Kyle was snickering from his own seat. It seemed that someone was finally doing something about Cartman's stupid mouth. It was pretty funny to see someone hit him for it.

"I am an American citizen!" Cartman growled. "I can say whatever I want!"

"So am I fat-ass," Kyo retorted. "And I'm expressing my opinion for you through violence."

"Kyo, Eric, is there a problem?" Mrs. Garrison questioned.

"Yeah there's a problem!" Cartman snapped. "Thus damn Jap won't help me with my god damn homework!"

"You should've finished it on your own at home!" Mrs. Garrison frowned. "And Kyo, if you don't stop hitting Cartman, I will have to send you to the principal's office."

"I promise, Mrs. Garrison," Kyo nodded.

"Hey, Jap got whipped," Cartman snickered. Kyo glared at Cartman and then smiled. Suddenly, Cartman's seat broke and he fell on his ass.

"God damn it!" Cartman shouted on the floor, rubbing his ass. Kyo chuckled at the fat boy's misfortune. Everyone else laughed as well.

"Hey, Cartman," Kyle spoke, "Maybe you should go on a diet!"

This statement caused more laughter to erupt in the classroom before it was quelled by Mrs. Garrison.

Later, during recess…

"Oh, I am so gonna kick his ass," Cartman muttered as he watched Kyo playing with Butters. Butters was the most friendly so he invited the new boy to play with him. "No stupid Jap laughs at me."

"Cartman, get over yourself," Kyle sighed. "Leave the new kid alone."

Kenny mumbled an agreement.

Stan, meanwhile, was talking with Wendy on the swings. So far, they were taking things slow after restarting their relationship. Right now, they were just having fun.

Kyo, of course, spied something in the distance and panicked, "TRUCK!"

A pickup truck suddenly drove through the fence and into the playground. Kids scrambled to safety. Of course, Kenny was not lucky as he was run over by the truck.

"Oh my God, he killed Kenny!" Stan exclaimed.

"You bastard!" Kyle yelled.

The truck started to move uncontrollably and was headed towards Stan and Wendy. They were rooted to the spot in absolute terror.

Of course, they would not share the same fate as Kenny when someone grabbed them and pulled them out of the way. The truck then hit the wall of the school and broke down. School staff raced out of the building to check up on the kids.

Kyo had jumped in and rescued Stan and Wendy and asked the two stunned children, "Are you two okay? Say something."

"You…saved us," Wendy managed to say.

"Dude, thanks," Stan said gratefully.

"It was no problem," Kyo rubbed the back of his head. He looked at the orange and red smear on the ground where his classmate used to be. "Too bad for Kenny, though."

"Well, anyway, you wanna hang out with us after school?" Stan offered.

"Sure," Kyo nodded.

Classes after recess were actually cancelled for a change and Stan brought Kyle and Kyo over to his house for something to do. As they walked in, Mrs. Marsh was cleaning the living room.

"Hi, Stan," she greeted. "What are you doing home from school so soon?"

"Some guy in a truck broke into the playground and killed Kenny," Stan answered as he and his friends walked past. It was almost as if he didn't care. "We think he was drunk."

"WHAT?!" Mrs. Marsh gasped. "A drunk driver?!" She always knew drunk driving was dangerous, but to threaten the kids? This was starting to get serious. She would definitely bring this up in the next council meeting with her husband.

"So, mom, this is Kyo," Stan introduced. "He saved mine and Wendy's lives. Can he stay and play?"

"Anything, Stan," Mrs. Marsh said. "And Kyo, thank you."

"You're welcome, Mrs. Marsh," Kyo smiled.

Suddenly, there was a loud knocking on the door. Mrs. Marsh went over and opened it to reveal an angry Cartman. "Why the hell did you guys ditch me? And what is that Jap doing here?"

Kyo was really starting to hate Cartman.

"Cartman, Kyo saved my life. He's cool," Stan defended.

"He's a freakin Jap! Why do you want him around!?"

"Because, you stupid fat ass, he's a lot nicer than you!" Kyle snapped.

"Shut up, Jew!" Cartman shot back.

WHAP!

"OW!" Cartman cried as he rubbed the spot Kyo had hit. "What was that for!?"

"For being a racist," Kyo frowned.

"You better leave, Cartman," Stan said, frowning as well.

"Fine! You can hang out with your little Jap friend! I'm leaving!" Cartman angrily left in a huff.

"What an asshole," Kyle snorted.

"So, wanna play some video games?" Stan offered his new friend.

"Sure," Kyo smiled