Author's Notes: Hi all! Welcome back for a fourth round.
Thank you to YaoiLovinKitsune and Trey Alexander for you inspiring reviews. Thank you to my new reviewer Ordinn Beaucephalis. When I first saw the length of your review, I was scared to death I was about to get my ass ripped off and handed to me as you proceeded to detail everything you hated and how I was wrong about everything. I appreciate all of the encouraging words. I've really been struggling lately so it's helped me tremendously to write this chapter.
I have changed the homecoming event a little from the way it happened it in the anime. It didn't make sense to me how they were just suddenly back, and Shinra had no idea cat girl was a part of the Eighth pending investigation. But anyway...
Well, here we go everyone. Hope you like it!
Phoenix could not sleep. The numerous inquiries ran around and around in her head forming a circle with no beginning and no end because she had no answers. Her main quandary at the moment centered around a certain dark haired fire soldier with ruby red eyes. Her palm pressed to her chest over her heart. What was that feeling that had overtaken her when she met Shinra Kusakabe?
'Do you believe in love at first sight?,' he had asked her. At the time, she had dismissed the unexpected question as illogical and silly, having nothing to do with the bizarre resonance between them. Perhaps he had a point for asking the question. She should have been patient and allowed him to continue. Unfortunately, she had a bad habit of being single minded about things and rushing ahead to get the answers she wanted. Kind of like now.
Her fingers absentmindedly massaged her skin over her calmly beating heart as she stared at the ornate hammered copper tiles covering the ceiling above her. Although this old Cathedral appeared to be quite run down, it did hold its beautiful secrets if one was willing to look for them. Beautiful secrets. There was nothing beautiful about the secrets she pursued: the secrets of Spontaneous Human Combustion.
Phoenix sighed in exasperation. Giving up on going back to sleep at this time, she got out of bed to go to Captain Obi's office. Might as well do a little reading until she got sleepy again. Dressed only in her pajama shorts and tank top, she made her way down the stairs and down the hall, her bare feet silent on the tiles.
Her hand confidently gripped the loose metal doorknob, keeping it from rattling as she turned it. However, iron grated against iron issuing a squeak that was as loud as a scream as it echoed down the empty hallway. She gritted her teeth and hurriedly pushed the door open to walk inside being careful not to slam it closed.
Switching on the small lamp with the stained glass lampshade. a number eight made of milky white glass glowed against the contrasting colorful mosaic surrounding it. The lamp was a recent gift from Captain Hibana. The Princess was awfully charitable these days, giving presents of not only home goods but gifts of her information and her time.
And her subordinates, Phoenix thought, a smile coming to her lips. She was quite happy here at the Eighth. The person who had received the best gift was her.
Pulling a thick file folder out of the first metal filing cabinet, she sat down at the Captain's desk to begin reading. She shuffled through the pages of what appeared to be an entire ream of paper, the numerous documents in no particular order. Everything had just been crammed inside willy-nilly. It was impossible to find anything about a particular subject.
"Dammit, what a mess," she grumbled, starting the process of sorting through the papers and dividing them into topics.
After the first sorting, she went through each stack to organize the pages chronologically or by some other criteria that fit the information therein to make it more easily searchable. She wondered how the files had gotten into such a mess. They certainly had not been that way when she turned in the information to Captain Hibana.
Rummaging through the desk, she found new file folders. Using pens of different colors, giving each subject a specific color, she wrote the name on the tabs of the file folders. Losing herself in her new purpose, she had no idea she spent the next several hours organizing the packed files Captain Hibana had been bringing over. As she was sliding the last new folder into place, the overhead light in the office turned on illuminating the entire room. She froze with her hand still positioned in mid air, the file slid only halfway in between the others.
"Old habits die hard, don't they?" Aktaru Obi inquired.
"What do you mean?" Phoenix asked, squinting against the bright florescent light as she turned to face him.
"Sneaking around during the middle of the night...searching through documents. All that cloak and dagger spy crap," he said, his arms folded over his chest. "You know you don't have to do that anymore."
The lopsided grin on his face gave him away that he was messing with her. She smiled sleepily, covering her mouth with her hand to hide her yawn.
"Actually, I was looking for something. I couldn't sleep so I came down here to do a little research. Instead I got distracted by organizing this terrible mess," she said far less humorlessly.
A faint pink color tinted the top of the Captain's cheeks. His eyes shifted away from her to the ceiling as he self consciously scratched the back of his neck.
"Uh, yeah, about that...there's something I've been meaning to ask you," he began, noticing her stifling another yawn. "Follow me to the kitchen. I'll make you some coffee."
When he turned his back, Phoenix unleashed the yawn, making a faint growling sound to match her big, open mouthed yawn reminiscent of a lion roaring. She followed him to the kitchen, sitting down on the one of the tall, backless stools. Her short pajama shorts rode up thereby permitting part of her warm bare butt cheeks to meet the cold metal seat eliciting a yelp of surprise from her. When the Captain swung around to look at her, she gave him a goofy but apologetic grin while her face filled with the hot blood of embarrassment.
"What's bothering you?" Akitaru Obi inquired as he opened the cabinet to get the coffee.
"I went back to see Shinra the other night," she confessed.
"Oh, really? Sneaking out to see a boy? I don't approve, young lady," he teased her.
Was he always in such a disturbingly good mood so early in the morning? She watched as he put a filter in the coffee pot basket, happily humming a cheery tune to himself. Probably so. The easy going Captain definitely seemed to be a morning person from what little she knew about him so far. The only reason she was a morning person was due to being a hopeless insomniac.
"Why did you feel it necessary to go see him in the middle of the night?" he inquired, his tone more serious. "If someone at the First had seen you, it would not have looked good for us."
"There was something I wanted to talk to him about. When I met him, this..." She paused, searching for the correct word. "...thing happened between us."
"A thing?" he questioned her, turning to face her with an eyebrow raised inquisitively. "Please explain before I get the wrong idea."
"I don't...I don't really know how to explain it when I don't understand it myself, Sir," she said, lacing and unlacing her fingers in her lap.
"Indulge me. Do the best you can, Duchess. I'm not asking for an official report here, recruit. We're simply discussing a personal matter," Akitaru Obi said, pushing down the plunger on the French Press.
Her face grew hotter until she thought she might spontaneously combust from embarrassment.
"When I got close to Shinra, there was this pulse from my tattoo. It was like a hard thump on my back. It was a pounding that I felt all the way through my chest," she explained, concentrating on the stream of white cream being poured into her coffee to avoid his intent gaze.
"You said the tattoo covers up scars right?"
"Yes."
"What if it that feeling has something to do with those scars?"
"How could it?"
"Are the scars from the flames like you thought? Or are they from the bug that killed your mother?"
Phoenix inhaled noisily in astonishment. She had always assumed the scars were from the flames because she knew nothing about the Infernal Bugs.
Captain Obi pushed the delicate cream colored china cup rimmed in gold and sitting on a matching saucer toward her.
Who bought this lovely cup?, she pondered, hooking her finger through the curled handle. Apparently her mind had to take a quick detour because his inspired idea born from the recent information they received was too much for her overloaded brain to handle.
"One of Iris's finds," he said as if reading her mind. Lifting his own plain, clunky black ceramic mug to his lips, he paused to take a sip of coffee. "You studied world religions right? Have you ever heard of something called stigmata?"
"Yes and yes. You're referring to when the wounds appear on the believers of a certain religion right? The wounds correspond to those of their crucified teacher and prophet, appearing in their hands and feet. The persons bleed and experience the pain and suffering like that man they believed to be their savior, correct?" she asked.
"That's correct."
"Are you a religious man, Captain?"
"I've never been much of a religious man," he admitted,"but I have taken a passing interest in religion from time to time."
"So you think this weird resonance between Shinra and myself might have something to do with the Adolla Burst, the remnant of the original and pure flame rumored to be left behind in some pyrokinetics?" she questioned him, holding onto her cup with both hands as they began to tremble.
Phoenix had also extensively studied the Holy Sol Temple and the zealots who worship the Sun God. The foremost religion of the Tokyo Empire would be better described as a glorified cult. Despite their over enthusiastic, bordering on maniacal, devotion to their Sun God, they were one of the three parties responsible for forming the Special Fire Forces to take care of Infernals. The nuns and priests pray for the individuals dying a horrible death by fire to save their souls under decree of the Holy Sol Temple.
Based on what she knew of the stigmata in reference to the other religion, there could be a possibility of some kind of stigmata, a connection, being experienced by individuals who supposedly possess a piece of the so called Genesis Flame. Did that mean Shinra held that power inside of him? Perhaps the bug left behind a trace of the Adolla Burst in the scars they caused by scratching her body. Unfortunately medical science provided no means to test for a religious blessing.
"So I'm guessing you're thinking what I'm thinking?" Captain Obi ventured, interrupting her speeding train of thought.
"If you're thinking..." And she went on to explain everything that had been running through her head while he leaned against the sink and listened.
"Wow," he murmured when she was done with her extended spiel. "I was thinking part of that but you carried it a step further when you added that part about the Infernal Bug scratching you while your mother was dying, trying to burrow into your body, and leaving those scars. There could be traces of the Adolla burst in those scars. You don't think it's possible that you have the Adolla Burst? Maybe that's where your abilities come from rather than genetics. We're still trying to figure out exactly how pyrokinetic abilities are manifested. Are they passed along from parent to child? Is it just a random act of the Sun God who chooses individuals? We don't know for sure."
"I guess some people would just rather believe in the randomness of it all. I'd rather not. Leaving whether or not you develop abilities or burn to death up to chance or up to a fickle god, is too dangerous in my opinion. This, this...disease, this plague, of spontaneous human combustion needs to stop," she muttered into her cup which she realized was empty when she attempted to take another swallow.
"I agree." Obi poured her a refill then himself one. "You feel like working out after this?"
"Sure." Hopefully wearing herself out physically would help ease her troubled mind. "Oh, there was something you were going to ask me earlier. Was that it? The stigmata thing? Or something else?"
"I'm glad you reminded me. I would actually like to ask if you if you would become my administrative assistant. I need someone to help me stay organized. You know, the paperwork, the files, the reports," he quickly added, almost humiliating himself due to his lack of structure and order in his office.
Although cleaning and arranging seemed to be her cup of tea, Phoenix was only doing what needed to be done. She actually was not a clean freak or compulsive about a place for everything and everything in its place. She could be a lazy slob just like anyone else but typically did not relax long enough to be that kind of person. Trying not to think too much about the three filing cabinets in his office and the tall stack of purposely ignored paperwork she had found hidden in his desk, she nodded eagerly.
"Okay. I'll help."
"Great! It's official. You're now my administrative assistant."
Hooray! An official, glorified paper pusher! She kept her mouth closed but could not stop her eyes from rolling around in her head.
Captain Obi clapped his hands and rubbed them together enthusiastically. "Well, time to work out. Let's go!"
~\..'../~
The next night, after another day filled with shuffling papers and forcing the Captain to sit and sign documents rather than lift his weights, Phoenix sat in her bed reading her mother's diary and looking over the few pictures she had of her. Her fingers traced the outline of her mother's gaunt, pale face in the picture taken three days before her death. She assumed her mother never left the lab and often forgot to eat judging by her almost painfully thin figure. Her mother's pregnant belly looked as if she had shoved a basketball under her dress.
Besides her mother's black hair, she shared her thirst for knowledge, a desire to learn, an insatiable need to answer every who, what, why, where, when, and how. Other than that, she did not know if she had anything else in common with her mother. For obvious reasons, she had decided to not become a scientist.
Glancing at the clock on her desk, she saw it was nearly eleven. She should at least try to get some sleep, but first she needed a drink. The air in her room was hot, closing in on her and making it difficult to breathe. Although she knew the stifling air had more to do with her mental state rather than the actual temperature.
Phoenix stood in front of the refrigerator, leaving the door open to allow the cold air to blow across her skin while she drank her water. As she stood there, a commotion erupted in the hallway. Thumping footsteps. Several voices, speaking low but rapidly and all at once. The loud whispering was interspersed with the hissing of emphatic shushing. The scraping of heavy objects being dragged across the floor set her teeth on edge.
She closed the door to the refrigerator to turn off the one source of light in the room as not to alert the people to her presence. Standing still, she watched three figures, silhouetted by the muted lights in the hallway, pass by the open kitchen door one by one. Without making a sound, she stepped out into the hallway behind them.
Shinra was in front, his head visible above those of the two girls behind him. Maki must the dark haired girl wearing the modest dress uniform with a knee length skirt and low heels. Who the hell is the other girl wearing the dress that barely covered her butt? Someone is missing. Where is Arthur?
"Hello," she called to them.
Maki jumped and let go of her suitcase. The handle banged on the tiles with a loud snapping sound that echoed in the hall. Shinra whirled around to see who had spoken to them. The unidentified girl shrieked like a banshee and lurched forward, jumping into Shinra's arms and knocking off his cap. Due to her dress being so short, the skirt flew up and his hands cupped her bottom covered by white satin bikini underwear.
Phoenix momentarily stared at Shinra's hands. Her eyes studied his fingers pressing into the ample ass of the girl in his arms who clung to him for dear life. She could feel her eyebrows raising toward her hairline in an expression of 'what the fuck?' as her eyes made their way upward to meet his. His lips were stretched to their limit in that impossible smile of his, baring almost every shark like tooth in his head.
"Get your hands off of me, you pervert!" the girl screamed, shoving Shinra away. "Why can't you keep your hands off of me, you sicko?"
Why was she blaming him for grabbing her ass? He would not have touched her had she not forced herself on him. From where Phoenix was standing, Shinra appeared to be the victim of the scaredy-cat girl who had taken advantage of him.
Without speaking a single word to defend himself or berate her, Shinra rolled his eyes and bent down to pick up his cap. He appeared resigned, almost jaded to the blushing girl who was still freaking out but no one was listening. His unusual reaction led Phoenix to wonder how many times this kind of accidentally lewd event happened between the two of them.
"What are all of you doing coming in during the middle of the night?" Phoenix asked. "Did something bad happen?"
"We were asked to leave the First quite quickly after our debriefing," Shinra said.
Debriefing? Something bad did happen. All three of them looked exhausted and worn out. She could tell by the pinched expressions on their faces it must have been an extremely upsetting something. Captain Obi would no doubt question them thoroughly tomorrow so she did not ask any of the questions on her mind.
"I'm Maki Oze," said the young woman with the biggest, prettiest purple eyes Phoenix had ever seen.
She moved forward to shake her hand.
"I'm Phoenix," she responded in kind. "Nice to meet you."
"Shinra told me we have a new member. It's very nice to meet you too."
The other girl, shamelessly pouting with her lip poked out and her arms folded across her chest, made no move to introduce herself. Her angry eyes remained averted from all of them.
"The rude one there is Tamaki Kotatsu. She's a temporary stray we've decided to take in because she's been suspended from the First until the full investigation into the incident is completed," Maki explained.
Was she always so trusting of people she just met? Phoenix wondered. She wished she could be so blindly trusting. Unfortunately, she had been taught to be wary of everyone from the very beginning of her life. Her time and job in the Fifth only amplified her suspicions of people and their motives. But then again, Maki most likely trusted her Captain and Lieutenant implicitly enabling her to believe in their judgment and instantly trust the stranger in their midst.
"Maki, why are you telling her everything?" Tamaki Kotatsu whined.
Apparently mistrust ran rampant in Company One too. No big surprise there. They were, after all, under the highest degree of suspicion for creating Artificial Infernals at this time. The First was even more underhanded and sketchy in their undercover operations than the Fifth.
"I haven't told her everything yet, but I can. Dear Tamaki here did what she did out of love. She shouldn't be punished for loving a man who didn't deserve it," Maki declared wistfully, placing her hands against her cheeks with a dreamy expression in her big purple eyes.
"For love?" Phoenix muttered, her nose crinkling in disgust.
She heard Shinra chuckle from behind the other two, but she could not see his face before he cleared his throat and wiped any expression he had away for a neutral, unemotional one.
"All you did wrong was trust the man you love and blindly do his bidding!" Maki exclaimed, pressing her hands to her blushing cheeks and wiggling her entire body.
There's the crux of the entire problem right there, Phoenix thought as she silently watched the exchange between the forlorn romantic and enraged and humiliated girl.
"I don't understand any of this," Phoenix muttered, her eyes bouncing from one person to the next in hopes of receiving an explanation.
"What the hell is all this noise about?!" a grumpy and half asleep Captain Obi demanded, making all four of them jump to attention and salute him without a second thought.
He might be cheery in the morning, but he damn sure did not like having sleep interrupted in the wee hours of the night. He stood at the end of the hallway, his hair a mess and his always sleepy looking eyes mere slits. As always, he was dressed in a black t-shirt and the orange jumpsuit, the sleeves tied around his waist.
"Why are you coming in so late? What the hell is happening?" he muttered, running his big hand through his wildly disheveled hair. His bleary eyes suddenly cleared and focused on Tamaki. "Who is she?"
"Well, Captain - " Shinra began to explain only to be cut off by Tamaki.
"Tamaki Kotatsu from Company One, Sir," she announced, saluting him.
"Oh, another one huh?" he mumbled irritably.
"Sir?" she questioned him, slowly lowering her hand from the salute.
"I'm assuming transfer papers are on my desk?"
Tamaki reached into the front pocket of her rolling suitcase leaning against the wall. Withdrawing a fat envelope, she stepped up to him to hand over the documents.
"Here they are, Sir."
"Great."
Captain Obi shot a glimpse a Phoenix as he took the papers. She already knew that paperwork would land straight in her inbox. More paperwork to be read, sorted, signed, and filed.
"Captain Obi, we were immediately sent home from the First due a major incident," Shinra interjected. "Valuable information has been collected. However, even more questions have been raised than answered at this time, I'm afraid. I could - "
"Never mind. I'll expect all of you to begin your reports in the morning. Phoenix," he called out, looking over their heads at her.
She stepped forward, moving past the two girls in order to speak with the Captain. When she walked past Shinra, she experienced a sensation similar to what it must be like to have a spear thrust through her back, skewering her heart. Her eyes locked with his for a second. He felt it too. His eyes were wide, shocked by the intensity of the feeling. Passing as close to him as possible, her hand brushed his making her heart beat faster.
Phoenix looked straight ahead, her eyes meeting the Captain's. He had noticed their odd reaction in passing and was silently inquiring if the resonance had occurred again. She saw his questioning expression and nodded.
Extending her hand, she waited for him to place the envelope in it. After she pulled back to take the thick wad of papers from him, he held on to the packet to look directly into her eyes.
"Don't work on this tonight. Put this on your desk and go to bed," he ordered her, hanging on tightly as she tugged. "We'll figure this out." His eyes slid over to Shinra. "The answer might already be waiting to be heard."
"Yes, Sir," she returned which prompted him to let go of the envelope.
"I want everyone to go to bed," he commanded them, glancing at the other three standing behind her.
"But I don't have a room," Tamaki said, sounding as petulant as she looked.
"A little warning about the addition would have been nice," Captain Obi mumbled, rubbing his hand over his face in exasperation. "Maki, show her to a room. She can have the one beside yours. Sorry about the mess, but it will have to do for tonight. There's a bed at least."
"All of the rooms have been cleaned, Sir," Phoenix informed him. "It's not set up but it is clean at least. There's a bed. There are clean sheets in the linen closet."
"You have been a busy little bee," he commented, smiling at her. "Well, everybody off to bed. That's an order."
"Yes, Sir!" they declared in unison.
The four people saluted their Captain, listening to his bare feet slapping against the tiles as he disappeared down the corridor.
"I'll show you to your room," Maki said to Tamaki, picking up her suitcase.
Tamaki with the angry yellow eyes cast a glare at Phoenix then Shinra before following following Maki down the hallway. Alone together in the hallway, Phoenix and Shinra glanced at each other, both smiling nervously, Shinra breaking into an extra large grin of pure awkwardness.
"Welcome home, Shinra Kusakabe," she said then immediately felt like she should not have. "I'm sorry. It must be pretty weird for someone who wasn't even a part of your company when you left to say that to you."
"Yeah. It is kinda weird," he agreed, rubbing the back of his neck self-consciously. His anxiety rendered him unable to tame his ear to ear grin. "But it's not a bad thing. Thank you for the, uhm, interesting, welcome. Well, good night."
"Good night," she returned not moving.
Shinra walked to the end of the hall but did not turn the corner. Instead, he looked back at her.
"You're not going to bed?" he asked her.
"I can't sleep," she replied. She slapped the envelope of paperwork against her other palm. There really was no point in her going to bed only to lay there staring at the ceiling for hours. "I think I'll get started on this."
"Do you mind if I join you?"
"I don't mind if you really want to. You must be tired though. Don't you want to go to sleep? It's late. I'm assuming you've been through quite an ordeal since you were rushed out of the First so quickly."
"Actually, I would like to talk to you about something."
Captain Obi was right. Geez, the man was practically a psychic. He was smarter and more intuitive than anyone gave him credit for being.
"I'll be back down in a minute. I want to change into something more comfortable first," Shinra said.
Phoenix giggled before she could stop herself.
"That's supposed to be my line, isn't it?" she joked.
"What? Oh!" he exclaimed, laughing lightly after the meaning of her joke sank in.
She looked him over from head to toe in his Fire Soldier's dress uniform.
"That uniform does look good on you though," she complimented him, giving him a big smile before walking into the office that now belonged to her and the Captain.
Phoenix sat down at her desk positioned next to Obi's. She struggled to pull the papers out of the envelope, working them out slowly. This was an awful lot of paperwork for a temporary transfer.
"Crap," she muttered, unfolding the trifolded document and doing her best to press out the creases.
She had just finished highlighting all of the lines scattered throughout the ten typed pages requiring Captain Obi's signature when Shinra walked into the office. He was dressed in an orange jumpsuit, the legs rolled up to the knees, and wearing flip flops on his feet.
"I apologize if it sounded like I was being forward earlier," she said as he walked toward her. "I wasn't hinting at anything. I have a tendency to say things I shouldn't sometimes...making them sound like they mean something I don't intend. "
"I do the same thing so I get it," Shinra commiserated, rubbing the back of his head self-consciously as he sat down in the chair in front of her desk.
"What is this?" he asked, looking from one desk to the other.
"I'm the Captain's new assistant," she explained without giving any further details.
Phoenix had not quite figured out all of her job duties herself. Pushing the paperwork aside, she stood up and moved around the desk to stand in front of Shinra. The large, bulky piece of furniture was like a barrier between them, and she did not like that. She sat down on the desk, crossing her legs. As usual, she wore shorts in preparation for bed which left her legs completely bare yet he did not seem distracted by them, only giving them a brief glance before his eyes returned to her face.
"Is it okay if I ask a question first?" she inquired, waiting for his nod. "What exactly did you mean by asking if I believed in love at first sight?"
"Oh, that," he murmured, his long black lashes lowering to shield his eyes from her. The smile on his face was small, pleasant, a bit self-derisive. "I feel a bit stupid for asking that. When I first saw you my heart beat faster and my palms began to sweat. I felt like I couldn't breathe. I was so nervous I didn't know if I was going to be able to speak to you."
"So what made you think it was love at first sight?"
"Because it was the way they always describe falling in love in books. To be honest, I didn't know if I was falling in love...or coming down with a cold."
They both laughed at the last bit.
"Yeah, falling in love can feel a little bit like getting sick," she agreed.
"Have you ever fallen in love?" Shinra boldly asked.
"Once or twice," she confessed. "But it wasn't real love. The wild heartbeat was tamed and the sweaty palms stopped. All the crazy, wonderful feelings ended and there was nothing left. Real love is something entirely different."
"That's a beautiful tattoo on your back," Shinra commented to quickly change subjects.
"Thank you," she returned, sighing heavily to adjust to the new topic and shift her mind away from sad memories of a dead and gone love affair.
"Is it okay if I get a better look at it?"
Without a word, Phoenix stood up, turning her back to him. As usual, she was wearing a shirt that bared her back, gathering in folds at her waist. She could feel the warmth of his body as he neared her, so close but not touching her physically. Her heart thudded against her rib cage, beating heavily in her chest. She inhaled, closing her eyes as the sound of her heartbeat filled her ears.
"You feel it...don't you?" he asked.
"Uh-huh," she replied.
"Does it bother you?"
"Not really. It's just a little...unsettling. Strange. I'm not sure what to think of it."
"Me either. Can I touch you? The tattoo, I mean," he added.
"Sure."
His forefinger pressed against the tip of the wing, following the line toward the head. A shudder ran through her entire body, shaking her from head to toe. He traced the intricately designed head until her entire body trembled. Apparently the encounter weakened his knees because as she turned he dropped back down into the chair as if he lost all strength.
"You know what an Adolla Burst is don't you?" Shinra inquired.
"I do," Phoenix answered. "I've done quite a bit of research on my own of the Holy Sol Temple. Interesting religion. One of the most widely accepted cults in recent history I'd say."
"What about Infernal Bugs?"
"I know about those too. Why?"
"I was able to detect one of those bugs by feeling that weird pulse in my feet. I saw a priest use one of the bugs on a person to turn them into an Infernal."
"A priest?" she murmured, leaning back against the desk. "But how..."
"They're treating it as a holy mission, purposely turning people into Infernals. When Lieutenant Rekka, a priest at the First saw the bug react to me, he said I have the Adolla Burst. He said the bugs have a tiny piece of it inside of them. He told me that's why it was reacting to me, recognizing the Adolla Burst inside of me," he explained.
"Damn," she muttered. The theories, the surmised possibilities, she had discussed with Captain Obi were all but confirmed. "I seriously doubt I have the Adolla Burst inside of me. I think I might have been scratched by the bug that killed my mother. If an even smaller piece of the pure flame, like the tiny bit of genetic material left behind in people killed by the bugs, remained in the scar...that would explain what's causing this...this feeling between us."
Phoenix further explained the stigmata she had talked about with Captain Obi. Her mind raced faster and farther.
"What if...what if residual bits of the Adolla Burst might be being left behind in people who survive attacks by Infernals? What if these people then have some kind of reaction when they encounter someone with the Adolla Burst?" she inquired aloud as if talking to herself to sort out her thoughts.
"You mean like a connection? Some sort of link they have in common to the Adolla Burst?" he asked as if to clear his own muddled thoughts.
"Maybe. I don't know. We don't have enough information. I don't know if there's no research or if no one knows yet. Or maybe...maybe we're looking at the wrong source. This seems to be more of a religious thing so we should be looking at the Holy Sol Temple. Don't you think?" she questioned him, needing confirmation she was so bogged down in her thinking.
"Yeah," he confirmed. "Phoenix, what if you possess the Adolla Burst? Why won't you consider that possibility?"
"I don't know. I just...can't. I suppose no matter what, it is my fault my mother died."
Phoenix shifted uncomfortably, standing up to walk around the room. She felt restless, unnerved by her own thoughts. Her turned to shift topics so she explained the stigmata to him.
"The stigmata is supposed to be a mark of divine favor. I definitely don't think of the scars from the Infernal Bugs as a blessing from the Sun God like those religious freaks probably would. My scars are a mark of disgrace, my greatest shame. I killed my mother."
"But you didn't," Shinra said, standing up in front of her to halt her pacing. "None of that was your fault. You didn't cause any of that to happen. You couldn't have prevented what happened to her either. Hey. Look at me."
Their eyes met again when his hands clutched her upper arms. Boom, boom went their hearts in unified, cadenced beats
"I really do know how you feel. Please, believe me," he pleaded with her.
"My mother burned to death around me. I was born out of her ashes. I saw the video of my birth. It was horrible. For years, even before that video, I knew I killed my mother...that she died because of me. I have to believe those damn bugs killed her because I am dying under the guilt."
"It was an accident," he countered.
"I feel guilty for surviving the accident," she swiftly argued.
"I understand how you feel on that too," he rejoined, his eyes holding hers. "My mother became an Infernal. She tried so hard to control it but our house burned down around us. Everyone believed I started the fire that killed her because my powers chose the most unfortunate time to manifest. That's actually why they called me a demon. Not because of my smile. Ever since my mother's funeral, when I get really nervous or scared or just generally stressed, the muscles of my face contract forcing me to wear that stupid grin. No one could understand why I smiled through the whole funeral. I wanted to cry. But I couldn't. All I could do was smile that damned annoying smile while they whispered about me...the demon who killed his mother. And my little brother."
"I'm so sorry," she apologized, not knowing what else to say.
Phoenix stepped forward, taking his face between her palms. The heart rending pain in his eyes looked as new and as deep, as she was sure it had been the day his mother died.
"My little brother is not dead. He's out there. Somewhere. Alive and well. I'm sure of it. I need to find him," he said, determination making his tone harsh, almost menacing.
"I'll help you. That's what I'm here for anyway. To investigate. To get answers. Shinra - ," she began, only to allow her words to die away on her thick, clumsy tongue.
Neither one of them moved. Drawing in a deep breath, she leaned forward to press a kiss to his forehead. Acting before thinking, it just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. She held her breath, biting her lower lip as she waited for him to say something. His eyes were unfocused, staring straight at her but not seeing her.
"Do you believe in love at first sight?" he asked her again.
"No," she answered bluntly. "However, I can believe in falling into like with somebody."
"In like?" he scoffed. "In like at first sight doesn't have the same ring to it."
"Mmmm," she hummed, her hands still on his cheeks and her lips hovering close to his. "I believe liking someone shows more of a sincere interest. Liking you means I want to get to know you better. I want to know more about you than exploring a fantastic and instant chemical reaction, a physical attraction."
"That's an awfully cynical point of view, don't you think?"
"I would have never taken you to be the romantic type," she teased, lowering her hands from his face to press her palms to his chest. "Maybe my point of view is a bit cynical. Don't get me wrong. Falling in love is fun, it's great. But it's like an accident, like tripping and falling flat on your face. You fall fast and hard and often the landing hurts like hell. Like I said, I've done it before myself. I think it's a pointless waste of emotional energy. But love, real love, that's something different entirely."
"What's the difference?" he asked with genuine curiosity.
Phoenix struggled to find a way to explain. How do you put into words such an ephemeral concept as falling in love? Everyone's personal opinion on love, their experience, their emotions, are different where true love is concerned. However, the basic concept remains the same. Searching for the words to explain the difference between such two diverse but both equally ambiguous concepts of love, she gazed into his eyes.
"I'm being serious. I want a sincere answer," he said when she was still not saying anything.
"Hmmm," she hummed thoughtfully, smiling at him. "You're just as relentless as I am when you want to know something."
Phoenix backed away from him, turning away.
"Love can't be explained in a few words and is even more difficult to understand. Love is something you have to figure out for yourself. Needless to say, it's a very personal experience, subject to every person's own interpretation and how they see it through the filter of their life. Sometimes I think I might have a skewed definition so I really don't know. Maybe I'm searching for something that doesn't exist. My idea of love is a unicorn."
Shinra laughed humorlessly. The smile dropped from his face as he grew completely serious, perhaps too much so, again.
"That's disappointing," Shinra sighed.
"It is what it is."
It was too late and she was too tired for a deep discussion like this. But she not sleep anyway and neither could he so why not spend the time talking to him even it was about such an asinine topic?
Phoenix pivoted on her heel to face him once more. Her eyes met his as she carefully considered her next words to him.
"Falling in love is easy. It's an immediate response. The initial attraction. The excitement, the thrill...the beating heart and sweaty palms...all the things you talked about. Once chance meeting, and there you are. You're in love. But love...lasting love," she sighed, not intentionally being dramatic. "That kind of love is what comes after all of that. Love is independent of feelings which are always changing, coming and going, getting weaker or stronger. Does that make sense?"
"A little. I'm still a bit confused though. Is love really separate from emotions?"
She stepped toward him, taking his hand in hers as their bodies thrummed in reaction to their closeness; a reaction beyond the possible connection of the Adolla Burst.
"Not always. But enduring love, lasting love, is a choice you make every day. Real love is when you decide to love a person when they're at their most unlovable. You continue to love them despite things they might do or say that drives you crazy. If they leave the cap off the toothpaste or snore or spend too much money. Love is when you wake up beside a person, when they have bed head and pillow face yet they're still the most beautiful person in the world to you. When, despite the stinky morning breath, you can kiss them and say 'I love you' and mean it with all of your heart.'"
"Wow," he murmured, his fingers curling around her hand and squeezing. "That sounds really...nice."
"Doesn't it?" she rejoined, clutching his hand in return.
Phoenix pressed her other palm flat to his chest. His heartbeat was fast and hard against her hand. His palm enclosing her hand felt a bit hot and damp. Rising up on her tiptoes, she brought her lips close to the corner his that were pulled into thin lines around his Cheshire smile. He was nervous now. She could not blame him.
"So...do you think you're in love, Shinra Kusakabe?" she whispered into his ear. "Or do you think it's the Adolla Burst?"
"I don't know," he answered, turning his face until his lips, whether by accident or design brushed across her cheek. "But I'm definitely in like with you."
"Ah, touche, Shinra. Well played, Sir," she responded with a little laugh.
She smiled broadly at him. She liked him too. His openness, his truthfulness, that certain degree of innocence with all of his candor; all things she liked about him.
They had both lost their mothers to spontaneous combustion. In constrast to her, he had allowed his experiences to take him in a completely different direction in life becoming a much different person. Despite what he had gone through, he did not allow bitterness or hatred to taint him, to make him jaded and guarded. Instead he decided to become someone better - to become a hero.
Phoenix definitely admired him. She also envied him because he actually had his mother for a little while in life, not only in words and pictures.
"We really should be getting to bed," she suggested.
But neither one of them moved, standing chest to chest, cheek to cheek, their mouths positioned by the ear of the other so only mere whispers were necessary.
"Good night, Shinra. See ya in the morning."
She bid him good night as a hint for him to leave. He did not move one inch.
"So are you in like with me?" he questioned her boldly.
Phoenix grunted in disbelief at his brazenness. He had no problem speaking his mind. Yet another trait to like about him. Oh, yeah, she was definitely in like here.
"Yes," she answered honestly. "I believe I am."
"Would it be so terrible if I had an accident and fell in love with you?" he inquired, his lips brushing her cheek in another covert kiss as he spoke.
She leaned a little closer, placing her lips nearer to his ear. Her fingers grasped his upper arms as her breasts flattened against his chest which heaved laboriously with each breath since he could feel her breasts that were not covered by a bra.
"It might be," she warned in a faint whisper directly into his ear. "What if it doesn't end well for you?"
"I suppose that means it won't end well for you either. It would be a shame for both of us to get our hearts broken. So why don't we not break each other's hearts?" he suggested, backing away from her a few steps. "I better go. I have a long report to write tomorrow."
He waved good-bye and left the room.
"That was an unexpected conversation," she spoke to no one but herself.
Phoenix stood transfixed in the middle of the room staring after him long after he was gone trying to process what had just happened between them.