Chapter Three: A Friend
Chris remained in the bathroom for quite a while, and though a number of other students came and went for various reasons, none of them took notice of the small canine-esque mutant curled up in the shower stall in the far back corner. As soon as he had taken to his hiding spot, he began crying again, quietly enough that he hoped no one would notice (and thankfully, no one had), with his eyes clenched shut and his thumb in his mouth. He tried to resist the latter, as he always did, but having everything he'd gone through brought back to the surface all at once during his session with Professor Xavier was just too much. All of those wounds felt fresh once again, all of that pain…
He wanted nothing more than to be held. For someone that loved him, that he could trust, to scoop him up off the floor and hold him close, rocking him in their arms and to tell him that it was all going to be alright. That he was going to be alright.
Granted, what he wanted, what he needed, went much deeper than that, but just to have someone hold him while he was upset would be leagues better than what he was doing now. Chris knew that he couldn't hide in the shower forever. He needed to leave, soon. If for no other reason than he needed to change (he couldn't recall having wet himself, but his jeans were sodden and cold, so it had been some time ago), and his stomach was begging for food.
The kitchen was always well stocked, but trying to grab something without garnering anyone else's attention could prove to be a challenge, especially when he was feeling as little as he was.
Taking in a deep breath, he used his free arm to wipe at his face, the sleeve of his jacket removing the remnants of tears and snot (much to his disgust), and though he hesitated, he removed his thumb from his mouth. It took more effort than he would admit to get to his feet, and as he emerged from the bathroom, he noticed it was far later than he thought.
The sun was long gone, the soft glow of the moon peering in through the windows, and aside from a few rebellious littles that liked to sneak around after bedtime, the hallways were empty. One of them made eye contact with him, but all the girl did was grin before taking off in the other direction. He wasn't worried about being told on, because that would mean they'd out themselves as well and get into a lot more trouble than he would, seeing as he was in the bathroom.
Chris wondered sometimes if they liked sneaking around just to see if they'd get caught, as he saw that one girl over Logan's knee on more occasions than he could remember–Logan being far too well known to give out spankings to the extra naughty littles. Though he didn't understand why anyone would want that–getting a spanking from a giant man with metal bones didn't sound fun at all.
Shaking those thoughts out of his mind, he made his way to his bedroom, quietly slipping in, so his roommate wouldn't wake up. Dan though, was deeply asleep, cuddled up to a large, brown plush rabbit that had been gifted to him during Christmas. There was a pink pacifier in his mouth and as he kicked his blanket off (which happened a lot), his bright pink and white bunny printed diaper was on full display.
Sighing, Chris made his way to his dresser, pulling out a pair of simple pastel blue cotton pants with a matching shirt and… a pull-up. Pull-ups were required by Professor Xavier for all littles to wear, regardless of age, at the very least, but Chris chose to ignore that rule more often than not. Unfortunately, his doing so earlier is what led him to having to wobble back to his room in wet pants, stinking of urine, so wearing the underwear-like diaper would be the lesser of two evils.
It wasn't that he didn't like them. He did. It was just a constant reminder of what he was… What he was hated for.
The design itself was cute, if not sort of plain. Just blue and white with yellow stars in the center that went all the way down and up the back–they faded when wet. Professor Xavier special ordered all sorts of designs and types of pull-ups for the students, from low-rise for those who were a little more embarrassed about them because they were 'big kids', to ones with special holes for students with tails (like himself). The diapers they had were the same, though he learned over time that the diapers did tend to have a much larger variety of cute designs. Glancing over at Dan, he kind of wished he had something cute too… but he wasn't about to ask for it, and he'd keep those thoughts buried deep down in his mind so no one would pop up with surprise diapers for him.
After stripping, he wiped himself off with baby wipes to get rid of the smell left by his accident and tugged the pullup on–it made a light noise when he moved, but once his pants were in place, the sound would be muted to all but those with advanced hearing. Fully dressed, he balled up his dirty clothes and dropped them in the hamper, not quite feeling clean, but a little better. As a last thought, he threw on a hoodie–the pocket would be able to hold whatever food he managed to find.
Dan was still asleep, so Chris made his way back out and down the halls, to one of the entrances of the kitchen. For a few moments, he waited outside in the corner, listening, and though there was shuffling coming from somewhere nearby, no one was actually in the room. Good. Breathing a sigh of relief, he entered and made his way to the closest pantry, sifting through the various snacks and easy to hide items that were in there. He wasn't sure what to grab though, not being particularly fond of most of what they kept–crackers, veggie chips, snacks from different countries that just had weird flavours and textures. There were a few things he did like, but they were typically the other students favourites too, so finding them, if there were any, was a bit of a–
"Hey there." Though it was spoken softly, Chris nearly jumped out of his skin, all the wolfish features he'd managed to retract popping back out as he jumped back and dove underneath the table. "It's okay, darlin', it's just me." Rogue giggled gently, leaning over to peek into his hiding spot.
Rogue was a little too, one he knew fairly well, though he wasn't sure if they were friends. She seemed to like being around him, and unlike many of the others, who were focused mostly on themselves or their own little 'groups', she was kind. She'd sit and talk with him if she saw him, would never ask about anything related to his past or his behaviour. They actually wound up meeting like this on more than a few occasion, and would sit on one of the upper balconies, typically the one connected to her and Kitty's room (as Kitty would sneak out to go see some boy–Chris didn't understand how older little's brains worked), and eat snacks one or the other swiped from the kitchen.
It took a couple of minutes for him to calm back down and even out his breathing, but even as he crawled back out from under the table, all his wolfish features remained, and Rogue grinned. Seeing his mutant side always made her smile, and she often made comments about how he was more of a 'puppy' than a 'baby', making him blush and giving him weird little butterflies in his belly. "Sorry.."
"It's okay. I'm sorry for scarin' ya." She stood back up and took a seat at the island in the center of the room, a purple sippy cup full of what Chris could only assume was juice, in her hand. Sitting in front of her was another sippy cup, blue, with juice inside. "Sit with me?" On silent feet, he shuffled over to the island and climbed onto the stool across from her–wobbling just a little, as his balance had never been too great, especially on tall chairs. She pushed the cup towards him, still smiling.
Chris' first thought was to unscrew the cap and drink from it like a normal cup, but he also knew that the cups were pre-filled and kept in the fridge, so it was likely a locked cap… and if he tried to force it open, it would likely explode all over himself, the island, the floor. That wasn't the kind of attention he wanted, but he was too embarrassed to drink from it in front of anyone, even his maybe-friend, so he just held it in his hands, swirling the dark liquid around.
"It was a rough one today, huh?" That's right… He'd passed her when he ran away from the Professor's office earlier. Sighing softly, he nodded. "I know the feelin'. But it's over now, right?" That much was true, at least, and he had a week before his next session. All that was left of the day now was to get a snack and try and get to bed without being spotted so he could try and get some sleep.
They wouldn't be having classes the next day, because the school was having some kind of 'superhero meet and greet' thing, but he didn't really know the details, deciding that, as soon as he heard the word 'hero', he wouldn't be going. Heroes weren't… They didn't mean much to him. With all he'd been through, it was kind of hard to believe that any 'hero' out in the world would care about him at all. Sure, they keep the world safe, as a whole, but if it came down to it, Chris whole-heartedly believed he'd be forgotten and left behind if the worst came to be. Aside from that, it was probably just going to be some super mutant talking about how great it is to be powerful, how they saved so-and-so cities from so-and-so bad guys and he absolutely did not want to be stuck listening to some Magneto-esque lecture about power and saving people. If he could get away with it, he'd be hiding off in the forest or, at least, the garden, until that was all over.
"No class tomorrow though." Chris spoke, barely above a whisper, but Rogue heard him and nodded, sighing happily. At that, he allowed himself to smile a little. "You going to… that thing?" When she nodded, he felt his ears fold, a little disappointed. If anyone would have snuck off with him, it'd have been her.
"Honestly, it's mostly cause Bobby's draggin' me along. Lotta the others are peein' themselves in excitement over it all though and I imagine it'll be pretty funny watching Logan and Scott tryin' to wrangle 'em all in." Chris thought that over for a moment, letting out a soft laugh. Jean and Ororo didn't have much trouble with the students, but they loved to give Scott and Logan hell. "See? I know you were probably plannin' on ditchin', but you can stay with us. We'll be way in the back anyway while all the others go crazy. That way, we don't get in trouble for not goin' and we can laugh at how silly they all look."
The wolf-like mutant nodded at that, feeling much more at ease with the idea, knowing that Rogue would be at his side. She was a little older than him when it came to headspace, somewhere around maybe ten or so, if he remembered correctly, and … to himself, on a really good day, he might even say she felt like a big sister. Sure, he wasn't even sure if he was allowed to call her a friend, but he could wish, right? After all her kind words, attempts to include him when others wouldn't and… things like this.
Yeah, if he had a big sister, he'd want it to be Rogue.
Bobby though, was a teenager, right around thirteen in headspace, and while he was nice enough to Chris when Rogue was around, he didn't give the younger boy a second thought otherwise. Chris often saw Bobby pulling Rogue around though, to hang out and play games because 'she was one of the guys', but he'd overheard some of the other 'teen littles' that it was because he had a crush on her. Proven true when he saw them kiss once. It was brief, so her powers wouldn't activate, and looked weird, but they both burst into giggles after, so he supposed they liked it.
"I guess… It could be fun. But I guess that means we should probably hurry up so we can go to bed, huh?"
Rogue didn't get the chance to answer though, as Ororo stepped into the kitchen, arms crossed over her chest as she gave the pair a stern look. "You should have been in bed two hours ago." Both littles looked up at the clock and gulped. It was nearly 11:00pm. "Put your cups in the sink and move along. Everyone has to be up early tomorrow and I don't want a group of cranky toddlers on my hands."
Rogue huffed, grumbling that she was a big kid and not a silly baby, but hopped down from the stool as she was told, putting her cup in the sink. "I'll see ya in the mornin', Chris." He nodded to her as she left, but didn't move just yet, filled with a deep fear of being yelled at for staying up late, for sneaking around, for being bad.
"It's bedtime, kiddo. Come on." As Ororo reached out a hand for him, he flinched back, so hard that he almost toppled the stool he was on, gripping the cup in his hands so tightly that his knuckles whitened. Ororo hadn't had a lot of personal contact with Chris–he was very good at avoiding most of the people at the school, the caregivers especially, but she knew enough about him to mentally berate herself for the sudden movement, and for raising her hand the way she had. "It's okay, Chris. I'm not mad, I promise, and you aren't in trouble." Her voice softened considerably from the stern tone it was holding before. "How about I get you a pack of graham crackers to go with your juice? Then I'll walk you back to your room."
The young mutant sniffled, but nodded, wiping at the tears in the corners of his eyes. If he'd snuck down this late, she knew it was likely because he was hungry–he never did join them for meals. (Rogue just liked being a brat most of the time, though she did keep Chris company fairly often, something they'd only recently started to notice.) Ororo went to the pantry and reached up to a high shelf, one Chris wouldn't have been able to get to without climbing, and grabbed the promised snack, holding it in one hand as she offered her other to him. This time, she kept her arm low, waiting patiently.
Chris hesitated for a long minute, but carefully scooted off of the stool and took her hand. She felt bad for him as they walked, seeing how his eyes darted around, ears flicking nervously at every sound–how he shook, ever so slightly, obviously ready to bolt away from her at any moment. But Ororo kept a firm, but gentle, hold on his hand, leading him back through the halls and up the stairs to the door to his shared bedroom.
"Now, I'm trusting you to be a good boy and take care of your trash and dirty cup first thing in the morning, okay?" Chris nodded up at her, holding his juice and crackers close, as though he worried she would take them away. "Now, try and get some rest. We want all of you to be up on time so you can have plenty of fun tomorrow." As with most of the kids, she wanted to wrap her arms around him, pull him into a tight hug and kiss the top of his head, but his fearful stance and wide eyes kept her from doing so. "Just so you know," Ororo paused, considering her words, "If you're ever hungry or thirsty and there are just too many people around, you can always ask for someone to get something for you. I know Rogue would be happy to, but if you can't find her, just focus on me, or whichever caregiver you want. Jean or the Professor will let us know and we'll bring you what you need."
"T-Thank you, M-Miss Ororo." Chris' face was red in embarrassment, but he could tell that she was serious. It would be difficult for him to bring himself to do that, to reach out for help but… just knowing that she would be willing to, that she, or possibly the others, would go out of their way to help him made his heart swell. "G-Goodnight."
"Goodnight, Chris. Sweet dreams." She left as Chris retreated into his room, and he listened as her footsteps softly echoed down the hallway. With a soft sigh, he took a seat on his bed, silently nibbling on his graham crackers and sipping at his juice. His stomach grumbled, wanting more, but he was satisfied… enough, for a while.
He placed the wrapper and cup into his nightstand to be taken care of in the morning, as promised, then crawled under his warm blanket, curling up around his pillow. From the position he was in, he could see the night sky through a break in the curtains and smiled. The moon was full, it's bright glow shining through the window.
He stared out for a long while before drifting off into a restless sleep–though whether that was due to his session with the Professor or his anxiousness about the coming day, he didn't know.