Auther's Note:
I'm so glad you guys are still enjoying the story! I know I'm a little behind in posting. This chapter gave me some hassles in editing, and on top of that, my laptop was giving fits. So, I hope I got everything ironed out. *fingers crossed* if you do have a hard time with the Bible being read in this chapter, then you might want to skip this chapter, but you will miss some things.
to the guest, I am unable to reply to you. but I did want to tell, LovingmesomeMK, I'm so sorry to hear of your puppy passing away. That is the hardest thing of having pets, but I'm so happy that I could help you. hugs!
"There's been an accident."
Matt heard the words, but it had no effect on him. It was when he felt Kitty's grasp on his arm loosen and felt her go limp as she fell forward. He looked over just in time to catch her before she could hit her head on the stone steps.
Matt picked her up in his arms. "Kitty?" He asked, but she was out cold. Mrs. Matheson rushed to Kitty's side, "Oh, My! Should I go fetch a doctor?" Matt glanced at Kitty's face, then her chest, to see if it was rising and falling. He shook his head, "No, she only fainted. The news of the accident was too much, and it overwhelmed her."
Mrs. Matheson gently touched a stray strand of Kitty's hair, "The poor thing, the thought of an accident that involves two of your little ones would cause any mother to faint."
Matt's throat tightened, for a moment, "Did she just say Kitty was a mother?" His mouth went dry as he tried to swallow the lump in his throat.
"Come on Mr. Dillon, we best get your wife inside. This chilly fall air isn't going to help her any." Matt looked up at Mrs. Matheson, "Uh-huh, oh, yes." The older woman held the door open as Matt carried Kitty inside, she followed close behind. Matt was good at thinking on his feet and dealing with these kinds of situations, but right now he felt like everything was such a daze. He didn't know if he should lay Kitty down on the couch or take her up to her room. Mrs. Matheson smiled at him, as she could see the confusion on his face. "Let's take her upstairs, I'll change her clothes for you. She'll be more comfortable and will rest easier."
Matt had the look of relief on his face as he followed the woman up the stairs to Kitty's room. He was so grateful for her help. He never would have asked her, mainly out of his stubborn male pride. But he was grateful that Mrs. Matheson offered to care for Kitty. Matt was all thumbs when it came to the small buttons, strings, and things. He wouldn't be much help in there even if he tried.
About ten minutes later, Mrs. Matheson came out of the room, she had a warm smile on her face. Matt looked concerned; but eased when he saw that Kitty was resting peacefully, for he knew his beloved Kitty would be alright. Mrs. Matheson quietly shut the door behind herself.
"I put her in her nightgown, she is breathing better and resting. She eased once she was out of the stays, the corset, and the gown. She should be coming out of the spell soon, but the sleep will do her some good. The shock of the news was traumatic enough for her, without going into details."
"Thank you, I-I don't know if I could have done it without a lot of trouble." Mrs. Matheson smiled. "Oh, think nothing of it, Mr. Dillon. It's my pleasure. Besides, it's not like they make those small buttons easy for you menfolk to undo, now, do they?"
Matt gave a nervous chuckle; the older woman covered her mouth as she just realized that she possibly just embarrassed the man.
"Oh, I'm so sorry dear, please forgive me! My late husband said I had a bad habit of babbling on, so it had a way of getting me into trouble."
Matt smiled at the woman, "It's all right Mrs. Matheson. You didn't mean anything by it, besides it's the truth." He winked at her. The woman could only smile as they made their way downstairs.
"Now, Mr. Dillon. If you need anything, please give me a holler. I live in the red house, just on the coroner of the street. But I am ever so grateful that your wife will be all right."
Matt nodded in agreement,
"Mrs. Matheson, you mentioned an accident, of some sort that involved..." It was then Matt realized what Mrs. Matheson had said earlier, "The thought of an accident that involves two of your little ones would cause any mother to faint." He took a sharp deep breath. He had been so worried about Kitty; he didn't let the reality sink in until now. The dolls, the toys, the books, everything was making sense now. He was starting to feel a little lightheaded, and the room was starting to spin. Mrs. Matheson could see it and led him to the nearest chair in the parlor. "You sit there, while I get you some water."
Matt could only blink, but he could now understand why Kitty fainted. He let out a long sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. Why didn't he put everything together before this?
"Here you are, Mr. Dillon. The cold water should help." He lifted the glass to his lips, the water was refreshing, but try as he might, he could only get a few sips down. For finding out he was a father, made a lump in his throat. "There, feel better?" Matt could only nod in reply, there was no need to tell the woman everything. But he drank what he could before setting the glass on the coffee table.
Mrs. Matheson watched him for a few moments. She could see he was trying to ask the question, but as much as he tried, no words would form, nor sound was made. She reached across and patted his hand. For she could see the worry, confusion, and concern was written on his face. "You look as though you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. But I can imagine a husband and a father being worried and concerned about his wife and daughters."
Matt rubbed his face, "Huh, oh, yes." He sighed, still in disbelief of it all. "You're right about that, I-I am." He sat there for a moment gathering his thoughts. Mrs. Matheson was so patient as she waited for him. "What-what uh eh hum was the cause of the accident?"
The old woman smiled, "I'm so sorry, it's taken me this long to tell you, and that I have to tell you, alone." Matt swallowed as his heart galloped. Was it going to be sad news? He gripped the arms of the chair tighter. "Your two little girls, preacher John and his wife, Abigale, were in a buggy wreck."
A few minutes had passed, like the ticking of the clock over the fireplace. Tick, tock, tick, tock.
When Mrs. Matheson saw Matt was ready for the rest of the story, she continued. "The four of them were out for a joy ride this morning. As they were taking a corner, a strange dog came out of nowhere and began to chase the horse. When it started barking and nipping at the horse, the poor beast spooked and took off running. John did his best to control the animal, but once the rains fell out of his hands, the horse broke free, from the buggy. Causing it to roll over. Everyone was thrown out right before the buggy tipped over."
"Was-was anyone seriously hurt?"
"Thank the good Lord, no. Your daughters have a few scraped knees and some bruises, but being children, they will bounce back in no time. The Preacher dislocated his left shoulder when he was thrown out of the buggy, but he will be all right. A few weeks in a sling and he'll be as good as new. Abigale is the one everyone is more concerned about. She is in the family way, and with being tossed out and landing on the hard ground, is bothersome. But the doctors have said as long as she stays on bed rest for the next few months her and the baby will be just fine."
He nodded and gave a sigh of relief, "I'm glad they will be all right. I take it that Sarah has the girls now?" Mrs. Matheson smiled, "Yes, she and her sister Mary were there, just shortly after the accident happened. Would you like me to tell her that you are here, as well as the girls?"
Matt bit his lip; he wasn't ready to meet the girls yet. He was just beginning to grasp the concept that he was a father. He gently shook his head, "No, not yet. I know the girls need their mother, but Kitty needs her rest now. I wanted to surprise the girls about me being home." He paused, as he rubbed his neck. Mrs. Matheson smiled. "I understand. Is there anything you would like me to do for you in the meantime?" He thought for a moment, then nodded, "Yes, would you be willing to take over a note to Sarah for me?"
"Of course, I'd be happy to. I can let Sarah know of Kitty if you'd like."
Matt smiled, "I'll write it in the note. But thank you. Sarah is an old friend of ours."
Mrs. Matheson smiled, "I could tell by the way the girls took to her. It was like she was their auntie. Sarah did say she would take care of the girls for as long as you and the Mrs. needed her too."
Matt only nodded as he jotted down a quick note, then sealed it up and wrote FOR SARAH ANDERSON, then handed it to Mrs. Matheson. "I'll take this right over, but I'll want to make sure that it is safe for you to be alone first." Matt stood up and walked her to the door. "Don't worry Mrs. Matheson, I'm all right now. It was just the shock of the news. But knowing everyone is alright… I'll be fine." The woman looked at him with her five-foot-two frame. "Are you sure?"
"I'll be all right, I promise. Nothing else I'll send Lady if I need too." The older woman smiled, "Well, if you insist Mr. Dillon, but I really hate the thought of you being alone, and with your wife still unconscious..." He only nodded again in reply. "Honestly, I'm fine." Mrs. Matheson eyed him up and down, he smiled at her concern. "Really, I will be okay, and If Kitty doesn't wake up by evening tonight, I will send for a doctor." At that, Mrs. Matheson eased, "All right, but you let me know, if you need to get a doctor, I will be more than willing to go and get one. That way, you can stay with her. I know the best doctors around here." She then paused as she looked up at him, "I will bring supper over for you both. So, there is no need to worry about it." Matt nodded again, she then walked out.
The door closed with a soft latch, everything felt so quiet and still it was almost deafening. As Matt stood in the entryway, he felt like the weight of the world was now sitting on his shoulders. He leaned against the door and slid down to the floor. Matt let out a long sigh as he rested his elbows on his knees, and he raked his fingers through his hair. He could no longer hold back his tears. The pain hurt; his heart felt like it was just shattered into a million little pieces, to the point, that could never be mended again.
He looked up to the heavens,
"Dear God," He cried out, "God, this hurts so much! This pain hurts more than being hit by a bullet, being pistol-whipped, or being punched. God, I-I don't know what to do or think, I..."
He cried as he wiped his tears away. "I-I don't know what to feel right now. I should be upset with her, but... I don't understand it I can't find it in my heart to be." His eyes were so blurred he couldn't see. He felt broken,
"God, I..."
Matt sighed, there were no words that he could think of, and none would form on his lips or make the sound on his tongue. He pressed his forehead against his arms, as he let his heart cry out. Many said he was a giant of a man, but there in that moment, he felt that he was as small as the child that was born yesterday.
But in all the tears and sorrow, there was a stillness that filled the room. Matt felt his heart soften to its gentle pace once again. He looked up to see the warm sunlight peeking in through the window, and a still small voice speak.
"Peace Be Still and know that I am God."
Matt sniffed, as he looked to the stairs, where the sunlight was landing. Did he have any right to be upset at Kitty for what she had done to him? Should she have kept those girls a secret from him? Matt bit his lip. As the voice spoke again.
"Be Still and know that I am God."
Matt sighed, as he let go of the thoughts that swirled inside of him. The only thing he could do was to hear Kitty's side of the story and not get upset at her. She had her reasons; he was sure of that. He let out a sigh as he leaned his head on the door. He then looked at his bag that was sitting by the stairs. Matt pushed himself up to his full height and made his way over to the suitcase.
He hesitated for a moment, then he opened it. There on the top sat the dolls and his father's Bible. He took a deep breath, as he picked up the Bible. He then swallowed the lump that was in his throat as he pulled out the two dolls. Matt looked over the dolls, as they brought back the memories of the dreams, with Kitty, the girls, and the life they shared together.
Matt shook his head, as he tucked the Bible under his arm, and held the two dolls in his hands. His mind swirled with everything that was just told to him. It was a lot to prosses, and he didn't know how he was going to, but it was the truth, and there was no going back, only going forward.
Matt took the stairs two at a time, he sighed when he reached the top. But smiled when he was greeted by Lady, who was laying by Kitty's door. He smiled as he reached down and scratched her ears, "Yeah, you know she's in there, don't ya." Lady only looked from him to the door and back again. As if she understood. "She's going to be alright. She's only sleeping. You want to go in, and see?"
Matt opened the door, and Lady quietly walked in and went to the bed. She gently sniffed the hand, and nudged it, hoping it would move, but nothing happened. She then looked up to Matt and gave a whimper, as if she was seeking permission. He nodded. Lady then jumped up on the bed and curled up at Kitty's feet. Matt smiled. Kitty always loved animals. He could only hope this would help bring her around. He set the dolls on the dresser as he grabbed a chair, opposite side of the room. Then he sat down beside Kitty. He then took her hand and felt her pulse. It was steady and strong, which was a healthy sign. He held on to her hand and gently rubbed it with his thumb and kissed it, before putting it under the covers.
"Oh darlin." He sighed, "If you would have just said something, or just flat out told me, I would have done right by you." He hoped she would stir, but she made no sound.
Matt flipped through the endless amount of pages and landed on a place that was marked. He looked up at the heading of the book, it read, Hosea. He took a deep breath. Why was this marked? He couldn't remember if he did it or his father. He knew the story, God had told Hosea to marry a prostitute, and by doing so he was showing God's love to the nation of Israel. Matt sighed, as he looked at Kitty, this had nothing to do with them, did it?
But there was no harm in rereading the story again. As Matt read, he saw the story in a new light. Yes, Hosea was a prophet of God, but he was also a man, that loved his wife, deeply, strongly, and with an everlasting love. Matt was sure Hosea's heart was broken when he found his wife in a brothel or being sold off to the highest bidder. Yet this man, paid that price to buy his wife back, a wife that would run back to her old ways, of prostitution. When Hosea, was willing to set her free from all of that when he married her. But Gomer would just return to her old life. But after a while, God stepped into the scene, and he redeemed Gomer, she then remained with Hosea the rest of her days.
Matt looked over at Kitty, he thought of her past life. She once was a prostitute, but that had changed once she bought half interest in the Long Branch. Then she even had the saloon girls serve drinks only and nothing more. Unless they wanted more, that was their choice, they kept that money. Kitty wanted nothing to do with it. He sighed, as he closed the Bible, there was something about her that had changed from the last time he seen her, he couldn't place it. But whatever it was, he liked it a lot.
Matt started to think about himself compared to Hosea, he was nothing like the man, not in the least bit. He was no prophet, only a U.S. Marshal. But he swallowed as he looked back to Kitty. He loved her to the point of death, but he never committed himself to her through marriage. He always had his reasons on why he was married to that badge. It came first, before her, and even before God sometimes.
He turned and looked out the window,
"Lord, could you ever forgive me?"
He could feel a calmness touch his heart and warm his soul, he could feel a rush of peace flood over him, as he felt forgiven. Matt set his Bible on the nightstand. "Oh, Lord, I have been a fool, to think that I could have a nonpermanent relationship, with no strings attached. I know things don't work that way. Honestly, I thought..." Matt raked his fingers through his hair, "I guess I was just scared. Kitty has been more faithful than I have been. Oh, Lord please help me."
"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness."
Matt let out a long sigh, he had no words, there was nothing else he could say. For he needn't to say anything. He stood up and walked over to the dresser, where he placed the dolls.
Lady's ears perked up, and she jumped down and followed him. Matt picked up the doll Amanda, he looked at her dress, the deep blue color with lace. It reminded him so much of the dream, same as when he picked up Lucy. He looked down at Lady to see her tail wagging as she sniffed the dolls. Lady had that look as if she knew whose they were.
"You miss those girls, don't ya?" Lady lowered her head, as she looked up at him, in reply. Matt placed the dolls back on the dresser, but as he did, a silver-plated photo frame caught his eye. It was two little girls, sitting together, with Lady at their feet and Kitty standing behind them. Then alone photo was tucked inside the frame, it was Matt. All dressed up in his Sunday best.
He bit his lip, he felt like he could almost cry again. Seeing the picture of his little girls, they were beautiful, and Kitty. Well, she was the most beautiful mother Matt had ever seen. He glanced back over to Kitty, who was still unconscious, then back over to the picture. He felt a mixture of heartache and bittersweetness. He picked the three things up and placed them on the nightstand, so Kitty could see them when she woke up.
He sat back down and picked up her hand, "Lord, help me to love her with an everlasting love. Even though my heart is in pain, and it hurts. Let me love her, as you love her."
It was then Matt heard Kitty moan something,
"Kitty, Kitty, darlin. I'm right here. Come back to me sweetheart, please! We need you, Kitty. The girls and I both need you."
Kitty moved her head from side to side, but that was all. Matt picked up a damp cloth and dabbed her face with it, "I'm here, Kit. I'm here."
Kitty sat up and screamed, then shouted for the girls, "BETHANY! MADDIE!" Matt felt his heart sink, as he watched all of this unfold. She was in the state of shock. She'd start to cry out in panic. "My girls, where are my darling girls!" She started to rock herself back and forth. Matt had tried his best to hold her in his arms as a mother would her child, but nothing would help, and he could never bring himself to slap her out of shock. That was out of the question.
Matt looked around the room and found the one thing that would work. He looked up to the heavens and said a quick prayer, then took a hold of the pitcher. "Here goes nothing...Kitty, please forgive me."
In one quick second, Kitty went from being in a hellish nightmare to gasping and coughing,
"What the..." She then blinked as she looked over at Matt, who was holding the pink pitcher. "MATT!"
He gulped, "I'm sorry about that sweetheart. You were in shock and I-I wasn't about to slap you out of it." He half smiled at her; as she gave him a stern glair, but it soon softened. Once he felt it was safe to approach her, he brought her a towel, "How, uh do you feel?"
Kitty let out a sigh as she looked up at him in displeasure, "I feel like a drowned rat. But otherwise, I feel alright." She then looked down at her nightgown. "Did you put me in this?"
Matt shook his head, "No, Mrs. Matheson did. After you fainted, she was kind enough to change your clothes for me and helped me get you settled in. Otherwise, you might still be in all that get up."
She smiled as she only rolled her eyes, "I have a tough time believing that one. But remind me to thank her next time I see her."
Matt chuckled, "Well, you can do that tonight, she's bringing supper over for us."
Kitty felt her heart stop for a moment. Was there something wrong with the news that Mrs. Matheson brought? She held on to Matt's hand. She had forgotten he was holding it the whole time when he had set the pitcher down and brought the towel over. Her grip had tightened as she looked up at him.
"Matt, what was the news that Mrs. Matheson had to share?"
He sighed,
"Well, Kitty. Our girls were in a buggy accident, along with the preacher and his wife. But everyone was okay."
Kitty found herself unable to breathe. Matt was told by a stranger (to him at least) that he was a father, that he had two little girls that she never told him about. She looked down, holding her breath.
"Kit, Kitty, sweetheart. Take a breath, come on stay with me."
He blew in her face, getting her to take a breath. She inhaled as she looked over at the nightstand, there were the dolls, and picture frame. Kitty swallowed there was no more hiding or running from this anymore.
"Oh, Matt. I'm so sorry, I-I never meant to keep them from you. I-I just." Kitty could no longer keep it in, all her emotions came flooding through, she would hiccup as she sat there sobbing. Matt sat down on the edge of the bed, and opened his arms to her, letting her cry on his shoulders. There was no need to scold her, she was doing enough of that on her own. He just needed to be there for her and let her have a shoulder to cry on.
"Sh! Kitty. It's going to be all right. I-I forgive you and I still love you."
"Oh Matt!" She sniffed. "It's so much more than just the girls. It's-It's well, it's a long story."
"Well, I'm not going anywhere anytime soon."
Kitty pulled away from him, "All right. But I think we better make some coffee, because we are going to need it for this type of story."
Matt smiled. "Well, my dear, how about I take you downstairs, and you can tell me some of it well I make it?"
"You mean, you're not upset with me?"
Matt picked her up in his arms, "Kit, if I was upset, then I'm the one in the wrong, and two wrongs don't make a right. I'm more heartbroken than anything. But this old heart of mine can be mended by some healing, with the Lord's help. This hurt doesn't make me love you any less." He said as he kissed her on the forehead. He started to walk out of the room with her,
"Matt, you forgot my housecoat."
The cowboy had a smile on his face as he turned and strolled back into the room, "Sorry about that darlin."
"it's alright."
He smiled at her, "Anything else, before we go downstairs?"
She laughed, "No, cowboy. I think you'll want to hear the story before you're ready for anything else."
"Does that mean I need to be worried?"
"No, it's just that there is a lot to take in. Do you think you're ready for it?"
Matt smiled at her, "Kitty, I think after all the news about our girls being in an accident, and you fainting, I think I am as ready for it as I will ever be." With that, he carried her downstairs and started a new pot of coffee.
TBC