Ahh… My dear beloved

A lovely and noble flower of evil

Truly, you are the most beautiful of all

Mirror, mirror on the wall

Who is the…

Those who are guided by the dark mirror

As long as your heart desires,

Take the hand that appears in the mirror

For me. For them. For you.

We are all running out of time.

No matter what,

never let go of my hand.

✯¸.•'*¨'*•✿ ✿•*'¨*'•.¸✯

Complete and utter darkness. That was the first thing and only thing I saw when I opened my eyes.

"This isn't my room," I muttered tiredly, patting down my surroundings to find anything that could tell me where the fuck I was. But I wasn't expecting to feel only satin covering a hard wooden surface, and I started to panic.

"Fucking shit, am I in a fucking coffin?" I seethed, anger overtaking any remaining feelings of panic, "I swear to god, if I'm fucking buried alive, I'm gonna haunt some motherfuckers."

I started to kick and push at the lid of the coffin, but it seemed like it was locked or something because it wouldn't fucking budge.

"Fucking hell, fuck, fuck, fuck, I need to calm down. Remember Ichigo, a person can have about five hours of air in a coffin if they don't start panicking," I say to myself to hold back my tears. Guess what, that wasn't working since I could feel the fat tears dripping down my face.

I choked back a sob and started to dig through my clothes to see if I had my phone with me, but I noticed that what I was wearing right now wasn't the same as what I wore before I went to sleep. These were some fancy schmancy satin robes with a button-up and pants, while what I threw on to go to bed was a red Sriracha t-shirt with some black velvet shorts.

But you know what, at the very least I had my totally awesome pink phone. Yeah, let's totally ignore the totally not sus clothing change, Ichigo. Totally not creepy at all.

"Dude, who the fuck redressed me and gave me a bra? If I'm gonna be suffocated to death, I'd at least like the girls to be free," I grumbled while fumbling with my phone to turn it on the flashlight.

But then I hear this really fucking squeaky voice that sounds like it could come from either a gremlin or a child, which in my opinion is just the same difference.

"I better hurry up and find that uniform before someone spots me… Urgggh… This lid weighs a ton!" The squeaky voice exclaimed excitedly, "Try this on for size! Mya-ha!"

Suddenly, an uncomfortable warmth engulfed me, and the door started to creak open. I was surrounded by brilliant blue flames, and I couldn't help but scream like an anime girl.

"Now to grab the goods… What?! You ain't supposed to be awake!" The squeaky voice exclaimed.

In front of me was a gray cat-raccoon demon hybrid thingie with an old black and white ribbon on its neck and a pitchfork tail, and it was talking. The fucking demon cat thing was fucking talking. And the room I was in, guess what, there's fucking floating coffins in it. What fucking magical nightmare land am I in, and why did it feel so fucking familiar?

"WHAT THE FUCK!" I couldn't help but screech, "First, there's a fucking talking fire-breathing demon cat, and then there's fucking floating coffins! Fucking shit!"

"How... How DARE YOU! I am no DEMON CAT! I'm Grim, sorcerer extraordinaire!" Grim shouted, "Tch. Whatever. You...human! Just gimme your uniform, and be quick about it! 'Cause if you don't...you're gonna regret it!"

"Soz kitty, I only strip for paying customers, and you're not one of those."

"Don't make it weird, human! Just give me your uniform!"

I stared at the cat thingie in disbelief, made eye contact, flipped him off, and started running like hell was at my heels. I made it down a couple of stone corridors and into a library when I heard the damn demon cat again. I ducked behind one of the many shelves filled with books and sighed in relief when I heard him move elsewhere. I surveyed my surroundings, saw that some of the books were floating, and decided to flip them off.

"Huh," I sighed, weariness creeping down my body, "Either I'm in a really fucking vivid dream, or I got isekai'd."

I slid to the floor and rested my head against the bookshelf I was hiding behind. The library had an eerie ambiance because of the low green lamps dotting the walls, but other than that, it was peaceful and quiet. I sighed quietly and tried to organize my thoughts.

Okay, so I was kidnapped by some motherfucker, and then put into a coffin in a medieval castle. Then a fire-breathing demon cat set the coffin on fire. Which, of course, let me out, but the fucking demon cat thing decides to try to snatch my fancy-ass clothes by threatening to set my ass on fire.

Why the fuck does that remind me of like the first chapter of the prologue in Twisted Wonderland? And the fact that the demon cat thingie said his name was Grim is ringing alarms in my head.

"Fuck it," I muttered and took out my phone. I turned it on and imputed my passcode. I swiped until I reached the app I was looking for and mentally prayed it would load. I stared at the mage stone loading screen, but the game crashed.

"What the fuck," I murmured and opened up Project Sekai. It loaded, and I accessed everything without the game crashing. I repeated this with my other online games, like Genshin and Cookie Run Kingdom, and they were all able to load with no issues. Pretty much, my phone worked like usual, except for Twisted Wonderland.

"That's good that at least I can play my other games, but rip TWST. My cards! My fucking SSR wedding Ace card is going down the drain! And I haven't even upgraded it yet! Oh yeah, and that fucking Club Wear Lilia's coming out too," I cried. But when TWST didn't load, that confirmed my suspicions that I might be in it instead.

"I swear to god, if I have to become Yuu, I'm gonna kill some bitch," I muttered angrily and a bit louder than usual. Out of worry, I looked around to see if Grim was coming. I was about to sigh in relief that I didn't replace Yuu despite all the red flags that pointed to that when the motherfucker decided to show his face.

"Foolish human! Did you really think you could slip away from ME?" The fire-breathing heathen cried.

"I mean, I did, you moron!" I screamed at him because all of my brain cells decided to leave me at that moment.

"Moron! Now, unless you wanna get burned to a crisp, take off that— Me-YEOW! That hurt! What gives?"

I looked up in alarm at the meow meow's sudden yell when I noticed my knight in shining armor holding a whip that held the Grimlord in place.

"Consider it tough love," my savior, aka Crowley, said and then spun towards me, "Ah, I've found you at last. Splendid. I trust you're one of this year's new students? My, were you ever eager to make your debut. And bringing a poorly trained familiar with you? That is a clear violation of the school's rules."

"As if I'd serve some lowly human! Now lemme go!" Grim shrieked in anger.

"Yes, yes. Rebellious familiars always say that. Do be quiet for a bit, won't you?" the bird-man said while shutting Grim up with a bit of the whip surrounding him.

The heathen started to scream unintelligibly, but Bird-man paid no more attention to him.

"Dear me. Of all the students I've dealt with, you're the first with temerity enough to open their own gate and step out of it. Does the very notion of patience elude you?" He said with a hint of exasperation, "No matter. Your orientation has already begun. Let us return to the Mirror Chamber."

"Wait, sir, what do you mean by me being a student?" I ask hesitantly, trying to portray myself as a totally wholesome motherfucker that could do no wrong.

"You awakened in a room full of gates, did you not? All of the students here at the campus arrived by passing through such gates," the bird-man explained, "Although typically the students have restraint enough to wait until I open them before waking up."

"I-I'm pretty sure that demon cat thingie blew the lid off mine," I whimpered pathetically.

"The culprit appears to be that familiar of yours," Bird-man explained as if I didn't even speak, "You're the one who insisted on bringing it, so curtailing its behavior is your responsibility!"

I was about to explain to him that Grim wasn't my familiar. Then I remembered how in the game, Yuu was blown off and interrupted by him in the prologue, so I decided to just give up on my wholesome persona.

"Well, sir, at the very least, can you tell me who you are and where I am?" I asked sharply.

"Hm? Have you not fully regained consciousness?" Bird-man asked, probably confused by my change in demeanor, "The timespace teleportation must have addled your memories… Well, these things happen, I suppose. I shall explain it to you while we walk. Truly, my magnanimity is boundless."

I nodded curtly in response, and we walked over to what looked like a courtyard filled with apple trees.

"Ahem," Bird-man coughed slightly, "This is Night Raven College. It is an institution for students the world over who demonstrate a rare aptitude for magic. It is the most prestigious academy of its sort in all of Twisted Wonderland. And I am Dire Crowley. Having been entrusted with its care by the chairman, I serve as headmage."

"Oh, cool," I replied mildly, "Nice to meetcha, Mr. Crowley. But why exactly am I here at a magic school?"

"Well, only those who the Dark Mirror perceives as having a talent for magic are admitted to the college," Mr. Crowley explained, "Those who are selected are summoned to the campus through those 'gates,' which can appear anywhere. A black carriage bearing one such gate should have come to meet you."

"Sir, I'm pretty sure I didn't get picked up by a carriage. I only remember getting ready for bed and blacking out as soon as I laid down."

"Huh, how very strange indeed. That black carriage serves to receive a student chosen by the Dark Mirror. It too bears a gate that connects to this campus. And as you know, sending a carriage to meet someone on a special day is a time-honored tradition."

"Exactly where is this a time-honored tradition, sir?"

Grim grunted something muffled in frustration while I sighed in frustration.

"Now, let us attend to your orientation," Crowley said instead of answering my question.

What a bitch. If this was how the head mage acted, no wonder the rest of the students were little shits.