A/N: I feel like I might have lost some readers with changing the story title from Behind Closed Doors to Winter in Seattle, so I changed it back. I look forward to hearing what you think and as promised, here is a long chapter for a long wait.

Chapter 10

Addison tugged the comforter closer to her, tucking it comfortably under her chin. She turned onto her side and studied Derek's still form.

"Are you still awake?" She whispered.

She watched Derek's chest rise and fall where his hands were clasped together.

He gave a small nod, his profile barely silhouetted in the dark room. "Yes," he whispered.

There was a long stretch of silence before Addison spoke again.

"Do you see your father in yourself?"

Derek slowly turned his body to face her more.

"What do you mean?"

"It's just... sometimes parts of me remind me of Bizzy. I never saw it until she passed. I always vowed to never be like her."

"Yes. I guess I do," Derek said thoughtfully. "I think a part of them lives in us in a way. Or maybe we're just more aware of our similarities after they're gone."

"I sometimes wonder if in my determination to be the opposite of my parents, somehow I managed to only adopt the worst parts of them."

Derek scooted closer and rested his head next to hers on the pillow.

"If anything, you got the best parts of them."

"You wouldn't have said that a month ago."

Derek splayed his hand on Addison's abdomen, feeling her quickened breaths beneath his fingertips.

"Maybe I wouldn't have said it, but that wouldn't make it any less true."

Addison threaded her fingers through his and turned her head so that they were pressed forehead to forehead.

"It wasn't an aneurysm," she whispered mere inches from Derek's lips.

She felt him pull back a bit, as if he could make out her face in the blackness.

"What are you talking about?" He asked, confusion evident in his voice.

"It wasn't an aneurysm," she repeated. "Bizzy killed herself."

Addison felt a heavy weight lift from her shoulders.

There was silence as Derek absorbed this new information.

"She didn't want me to tell anyone," Addison explained in a quiet voice. "So, I lied for her, like I always have."

Several minutes seemed to pass before Derek pressed his lips softly against her temple and leaned in closely to whisper in her ear. "I'm sorry."

Addison felt goosebumps form on her arms from his breathy whisper, but a warmth like a small red coal settled in the pit of her stomach at having admitted a truth that she wasn't even sure was hers to reveal.

"And you knew the whole time?"

Addison nodded, knowing Derek could feel her movement beside him in the dark.

"I was the one that found her."

Derek ran his fingers through her hair. He wished she felt she could have told him when it happened, so that she didn't have to carry everything inside for so long, letting it fester and build into something no one would be capable of carrying.

"Come here," he whispered.

Addison turned over and pressed her face into his chest. Derek wrapped his arms around her, pulling her in closer.

She felt consumed by his embrace and faded cologne, and she was relieved to let him help carry the weight. Even if their relationship had become strained and unfamiliar, she was content in this quiet moment, knowing that she had a shoulder to lean on if nothing else.

She thought maybe tears would come, but when they didn't, she closed her eyes and succumbed to sleep.

Addison and Derek walked into Seattle Grace Hospital hand in hand. If they were going to fight their newfound reputations, they would do so together.

"Well, well, well," a booming voice said as the couple approached the nurses' station.

They turned around to find Richard studying them with a lop-sided grin on his face. "If it isn't my world-class surgeon couple." He leaned in to give Addison a quick hug. "It's good to see you again, Addie. Did you have a chance to look over those files?"

Addison looked at Derek sheepishly and then back to Richard. "Unfortunately, no. I was a little busier than usual last night."

She watched Derek try to hide a growing smile.

"Ah, well don't worry about that. I'll be in my office this morning. I'm swamped right now, so if anything should come up…" He looked around and then snapped back to the couple like a lightbulb had gone off. "Bring it to Bailey."

Richard gave them a wary smile before stalking off in the direction of the Chief's office.

"That was odd, right?" Addison mused after he was out of earshot.

Derek nodded, looking around uncertainly. "I don't think the Chief has ever greeted me just to greet me unless…"

Derek was cut short when he recognized a salt and pepper head of hair.

"What?" Addison asked. She turned to look in the direction that Derek was facing.

At the bottom of the staircase in the main hospital lobby stood Mark Sloan, dressed to the nine in his scrubs and non-slip tennis shoes.

"Oh, dear God," she said exasperatedly.

Derek was already seething. "What the hell is he doing here?"

Addison stood dumbstruck, unable to provide Derek with an answer. It was so like Mark to pull a stunt like this, and she expected nothing less.

Mark looked up from the nurse he was flirting with. Her face fell when he stepped away as soon as he saw Addison.

Derek stuffed his hands in his lab coat pockets and rocked on his heels, waiting for Mark to make his way over to them.

Addison didn't know whether she should run or stand her ground. Both options seemed like the wrong choice and by the time she had decided to run, it was too late.

"I can't believe Richard let him in here," Derek muttered under his breath as Mark approached the pair.

"You don't have to say it," Mark announced. "It's good to see you too." He gave one of his classic charming smiles.

Derek had the urge to punch him right then.

"Mark, what are you doing here?" Addison asked first, surprising all three of them.

"I thought I would get the gang back together."

"Oh, he's got jokes," Derek gritted.

Addison rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Mark, that's enough."

"Your Chief was in need of a world-class plastic surgeon. And you know I'm always there when someone's in need. I aim to please." He winked and, in a flash, Derek was lunging at him.

Meredith appeared out of seemingly thin air, stepping between the two men with her hands held up. "What in the hell is going on here!?"

"Meredith, stay out of this," Addison warned.

"Ohh, so this must be the girl friend I've been hearing so much about." Mark's eyes danced between Derek and Meredith.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Derek asked, looking from Mark to Addison. "Don't tell me you two keep in contact. That's rich."

"We don't keep in contact!" Addison threw her hands up and turned away from the growing party, feeling that familiar urge to run prick her in the side.

"I didn't need to hear it from Red," Mark smirked and crossed his arms over his broad chest. "It's all anyone in this hospital can talk about."

"What did I tell you about this circus and spouses out for blood!?" Miranda Bailey barked as she marched over.

She stuck a finger at Meredith. "Grey, go do your scut work." She then pointed to Addison and Derek. "Shepherd and Montgomery-Shepherd, go find your patients. And you," she jabbed a finger at Mark's chest, "you go anywhere that isn't here."

Miranda placed her hands on her hips and looked from one doctor to the next. "What are you waiting for? Move people!" She ordered.

All four of them scattered like roaches, saving their fight for a later time.

Addison turned the corner and found a nearby supply closet to dip into. She sat on an upturned bucket and buried her head in her hands, trying to catch her breath.

What was she thinking coming back to Seattle? Trouble seemed to find her no matter where she was, but with Mark's ambush, Seattle seemed to be a special kind of hell.

Addison cooed over a tiny infant in an incubator.

"Hi Emma," Addison whispered.

She wanted to see this little girl thrive. She had seen miracles before, and she hoped for another in the tiny life form before her.

Addison stuck her finger through one of the holes in the incubator and watched as Emma wrapped her small, plush pink hand around it.

"You're stronger than they think, aren't you, Little One?"

There was a shadow of someone standing in the doorway, but Addison kept her attention on Emma.

"Addison, can I talk to you?"

She looked up to find Mark looming in the entryway.

"No, Mark, you can't. I've got a million things to do, not to mention Derek is roaming the halls looking for a reason to kill you."

"You know I can take him." Mark gave her a smug look.

"That's not funny."

Mark walked over to her, his white tennis shoes squeaking against the vinyl floor.

"I know it's not funny. But I've been roaming the halls looking for any reason to talk to you."

Addison stood upright and turned to face him. She placed a hand on her hip and popped it out.

"Fine, what do you want?"

"I want to talk about how you left me in New York to come out here and fight for someone that doesn't even see you."

"Mark, please-"

"I see you, Addison. Me, the man who stayed up late with you and went to family events with you. I was the one that was there for you all those times."

Addison shook her head. "You didn't go with me. You were just there, and Derek couldn't make it."

"I bet he could make it to Meredith's things."

"Stop it."

Mark softened his voice. "I fell for you."

"Stop it, please," Addison begged.

"No, I won't stop until you see this for what it is – see us for what we are."

"And what are we, exactly, Mark?"

Mark took two giant steps and in one swift motion, he took her face in his hands and pressed his lips hard against hers.

He pushed forward, feeling her body mold against his. He backed her up until she hit the wall behind her, and he pressed harder against her. He dragged one hand down to rest on her narrow waist. His fingers slipped beneath her waistband, touching the soft flesh there.

Addison's mind was reeling as she tried to make sense of what was happening.

In an instant Mark was covering her everywhere and despite her best efforts, a small bud of desire bloomed within her.

She was somewhere in the clouds when she felt Mark's lips move against hers. When his tongue brushed her lips, begging for entry, the realization of what was happening flipped like a switch and she was brought back to reality.

She shoved Mark off her and covered her mouth in shock, her fingers delicately resting on her still-parted lips.

"What are you doing!?" She exclaimed.

"I think about you all the time. We make sense, Addison. Just admit it. You feel the same way I do."

"Stop it, Mark! We clearly don't feel the same way."

"I worry about you. Whatever it is that happened and how you're coping with Bizzy's death. I do, I think about you constantly. You look different. You seem different."

"Of course, I'm different!" She yelled. "Look at everything that's happened!"

"I don't know everything that's happened! Tell me, Addie. I can help."

Addison shook her head, feeling the wetness of tears suddenly slip down her cheeks. She brushed at them angrily. "I can't hear any of this right now."

Addison pushed past him and bolted through the door.

She stepped into the hallway and tried to catch her breath. The lights seemed brighter, harsher, than they had been in the NICU. She felt like she was under a spotlight as she forced herself forward.

Mark was right behind her. "It's because you know I'm right!"

The hospital felt suffocating, swallowing her like a small pill. She walked briskly down the hall that seemed to be getting smaller and smaller, trying to keep her vision straight, along with her footing. She could hear Mark calling out behind her.

She moved faster and came to an opening on the floor. She spun around, and Mark crashed into her.

"I love you, Addison. Please."

Mark gripped Addison's upper arms and took a small step forward, closing the distance between them.

"You what?" Derek stormed over to them from the other side of the hall, dropping his clipboard as he went.

"You heard what I said! I love her, Derek. And she loves me, even if she can't admit it."

Addison tore out of Mark's hold, bumping into Derek behind her.

"I know you have delusions of grandeur, but this is a new level, Mark."

A panic bubbled up inside Addison's chest and she looked from Derek to Mark and then the hoard of nurses and doctors who had turned to look at them.

"You were never there, Derek! You don't even know her anymore. I'll be the man that you could never be for her."

Derek saw red and it took every fiber of his being to restrain himself. "What did you just say!?"

Derek and Mark shouted back and forth, trapping Addison in the middle of the madness.

Her eyes bounced from person to person until they rested on a patient in a room behind the two arguing men. The patient lay very still in bed, looking curiously at the three of them and then his eyes met hers.

Her memory was slow to catch up with what she was seeing.

An image flickered in her mind of a pair of brown orbs looming over her. The same eyes that were locked on hers now. How warm they seemed then. How cold and calculating they were now.

Before her, the tanned man from her nightmares lay staring at her like a hunter having finally found its prey sitting vulnerably in waiting.

On either side of her, she could hear Mark and Derek yelling at each other, but their words were muffled now.

"Addison?" She heard from somewhere in the distance. She looked up at Derek, her eyes wild and swimming.

The room felt as though someone had spun it like a dreidel and she couldn't quite find her footing. She felt her body swaying. A blackness crept up from the corners of her vision and a terror made her heart thud in her chest so hard that she could feel it pulsating in her fingertips.

She placed her hand over her heart, suddenly feeling very faint.

"Addison?" Someone asked again. This time it was a woman's voice.

She felt her knees buckle and then the world went black.

"I can't even blame her."

"I know, right? McDreamy and McSteamy? I'd have a hard time choosing too."

Addison blinked the bleariness from her eyes to find a white tiled ceiling staring back at her. Her mind was muddled with confusion. Who was talking? Where was she?

"Oh, oh! She's awake."

Addison turned her head to find Izzie Stevens standing at her bedside and a sheepish nurse behind her.

"What happened?" Addison asked as she sat up in bed.

"You passed out for one. You should have seen McDream- sorry, Dr. Shepherd and Dr. Sloan. They both jumped in at once to save the day."

Addison's face fell in dismay. "Yeah, very entertaining, I'm sure."

"Sorry, I didn't mean- sorry," Izzie apologized.

Addison waved her away. "It's fine," she dismissed.

She rested her head against the pillow propped up behind her as flashes of earlier flooded her memory. Derek. Mark. That man. Oh god, that man.

"Where is Derek?" She asked abruptly, her eyes wild again.

Izzie looked up, searching her memory. "He should be prepping for surgery now. I saw his name on the board, I believe."

"I need to talk to him. I've got to get up." Addison tore the sheets off her and climbed to her feet.

"Dr. Montgomery-Shepherd, don't you think you should take it slow? You just fainted." Izzie looked at her uncertainly.

"I'm fine, I'm fine. Where are my clothes?"

Izzie pointed to the chair in the corner of the room. "O-over there."

Addison rushed to gather her things and ran into the bathroom to change.

Izzie rapped on the door and called out to her again. "Are you sure you shouldn't be taking it easy?"

Addison didn't respond until she had emerged from the adjoining bathroom.

"I need a patient's name and room number. Floor 5 directly in front of the nurses' station. A man. About 6'1", brown eyes."

"I have charts and-"

Addison was quick to cut her off. "Right now, Stevens. Name and room number. It's urgent."

Izzie had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. Residents never ceased to amaze her with their demands. "Fine," she huffed.

Addison left the room in search of Derek. She nearly ran over to the surgery board and tracked Derek's name in record time; however, by the time she had reached the OR, Derek was already in position.

She climbed the stairs to the observation deck, hoping to get his attention before he started.

Derek looked up briefly, finding Addison pressed against the glass with a look of panic on her face.

He gave her a questioning look but diverted his attention back to Dr. Grey who was handing him a scalpel.

There was no time. Addison had to find that man before he had a chance to leave the hospital, if he hadn't already.

She left the observation deck as quickly as she had entered it and by the time Derek looked back up, Addison was gone.

"On a mission?" Alex Karev asked with a grin as Addison burst through the elevator door, forcing it back open.

She took quick, uneven breaths and shot him an even look before pressing 5.

"I heard you fainted."

"Not now, Karev."

"Right, on a mission." Alex smirked and looked forward again.

The elevator rose painstakingly slow. Addison stared at the numbers as they changed.

Ding.

"No, but really. You fainted?"

"Karev."

Ding.

"I'm just saying, it could be a sign of something more serious."

Ding.

"Don't patronize me."

The final ding sounded, much to Addison's relief and the doors rolled open to reveal floor 5.

She practically flew out of the elevator and immediately bumped into Izzie Stevens.

"Godspeed!" Alex called after her before the door closed again.

"Neal Tanner," Izzie said as she handed over his file. "Room 504. What's the deal with him?"

She peered past Addison, trying to look into the room.

"Is he still in there?" Addison asked as she opened the file, unable to look at his haunting face herself.

"No, I think he was booked for surgery. He's Derek's. I heard Meredith talking about him earlier."

At this news, Addison walked toward the room and looked inside. The bed linens had already been replaced, but there were bags and personal items strewn about.

She walked carefully over to where a blue duffle bag sat. She closed her eyes and put herself back in that room she so often tried to forget.

There, on the dresser was the same duffle bag.

"Do you know him or something?"

Addison opened her eyes, bringing herself back to the present at the sound of Izzie's voice.

"Something like that," she said quietly. She rubbed her wrist absentmindedly, remembering the feeling of him pinning her down.

Izzie eyed her carefully.

"Will you page me when he's out of surgery?" Addison asked, forcing herself out of her reverie.

"Sure…" Izzie moved out of the doorway so that Addison could make her way out of the room. "You know I could check on him for you or…"

"No," Addison turned to look Izzie straight in the eye. "That won't be necessary. Please don't notify anyone."

"It's just-"

"Stevens, I appreciate your help in this matter, but that will be all. You can go back to your charts."

Izzie bristled at the icy tone Addison had suddenly taken on. She nodded, making herself small before scurrying away.

Addison walked through the hospital as if she were a ghost. She felt herself float down the hall, passing room after room, not knowing exactly where she was heading, until she stopped at Derek's OR room.

She climbed the stairs until she was outside the observation deck.

Taking a deep breath, she mustered the courage to pull out her cellphone. She pressed her back against the wall in an attempt to ground herself to something, anything.

With shaky fingers, she pressed 9-1-1 and put the phone to her ear.

"Yes, I'd like to make a report."

Ch.11 coming soon.