Author's Note: I don't have much to say here, but I do hope you enjoy this chapter.
Review Responses:
The J.A.M. a.k.a. Numbuh i: I actually got the Mickey Spillane novel recently. The first chapter has a good amount of violence, with the main character looking over a murder scene. I could see an imaginative kid like Arnold easily getting uncomfortable with it. The gore would have put me off it at that age. Also, yeah, Arnold won't be dreaming about a private swim (at least for now).
YaeliEz: Thanks! Here's more to read!
qwerpyblah: Well Olga's going to get Helga to give some outfits a try, but she might have to bribe Helga to do so.
HumanDictionary: I didn't plan the parallels between Arnold & Helga and Cecil & Olga, but once I started writing it became quite evident, so I leaned into it. There's hints in the series that Bob's ancestors probably came from Hungary or Ukraine, as the wiki mentions in the trivia section. I could actually see Helga getting the nickname Football Head from Bob, either from Bob talking about football a lot, or actually coming to a school function (for once), seeing Arnold, and going "Jeez! That kid has a head shaped like a football!"
Previously: After a weird dream involving the fake Cecile, Arnold wakes up. With the girl on his mind, he, alongside Helga and Gerald (who aren't getting along) start off for Gerald Field. After the rest of the kids welcome Helga back, practice begins.
Previous Married... with Children Reference: The shoe store Al Bundy works at is Gary's Shoes and Accessories for Today's Woman.
Chapter Eight: Going Shopping
Wednesday, August 20, 1997
Five Days Before the Start of Fifth Grade
Baseball practice went on for several hours until a car pulled up next to Gerald Field. None of the kids paid any mind until the window rolled down and a woman called out. "Harold, sweetie! It's time to go!"
The Jewish boy, currently holding third base, called out. "Okay, mommy!" He turned to everyone. "Sorry to cut things short, guys, but I promise I'll be here for practice Saturday."
As he left, the other kids put back their equipment and said their goodbyes. Curly was the first one besides Harold to leave, running off and screaming something about wrestling bears. Sid and Stinky started walking off, heading to see a movie. Brainy just disappeared.
Arnold walked up to Helga, Gerald behind him, the dark-skinned boy's arms crossed and a wary look on his face. "Hey, Helga. Gerald and I were going to go to the aquarium. Want to join us?"
Helga looked at the smiling Arnold. Oh, my angel, how I wish I could accept your offer and come with you, even if it does mean sharing your attention with Geraldo, but... "I can't. Olga's going to pick me up and take me shopping. Thanks for the offer though."
While Gerald mumbled "Thank God," Arnold had a disappointed look on his face.
"Oh... well, maybe we can do something tomorrow?"
"Sure, Football Head. See you later." Helga was happy to see the smile that came to Arnold's face at her response.
As the two best friends left, Helga walked over to the bleachers and sat down to begin her wait. Looking around, she saw Nadine talking to Sheena, with Eugene waiting near his best friend. Thinking that they weren't paying her any mind and would soon leave, she whipped out a notepad and pen.
She had been wanting to begin work on another play. While she had participated in several plays in fourth grade (Helga blushed as she thought of her stint as Juliet), she had been wanting to write another, mainly to see how far she had come as a writer since her play about the food groups back in third grade.
So far, she had come up with a bare bones outline for a plot about a young woman rebelling against her father (should I change it to grandfather?), and joining up with her secret love, a brave knight, to overthrow an evil tyrant planning to destroy their village, even as his best friend viewed her with distrust and hate.
Not shockingly, the idea had come to her in the wake of the FTi incident, but it had only taken on a medieval fantasy slant in the last few days. I blame Olga. Her nerdiness is rubbing off on me. She was currently fleshing out what she had before she began work in earnest. Only a madman would work on something longer than a few pages without an outline.
As she started to write out notes, she didn't notice the two girls walking over to her. "Hey, Helga, Sheena and I were-"
Helga cut off Nadine with a surprised yelp as she fell backwards, banging her back against the bleacher behind her.
Sheena, who had been standing next to Nadine, rushed over, her instincts from being Eugene's best friend kicking in. "Are you alright, Helga?"
While her back slightly hurt, it wasn't too bad. "I'll be fine. I didn't hit it too hard. Thanks for asking."
Nadine was apologetic. "I'm so sorry, Helga. I didn't mean to startle you. I just wanted to ask if this Friday you would want to hang out with Sheena and me. Since Phoebe and Rhonda are both on vacation this week, and Eugene is going to be busy, I thought the three of us could hang out and get to know each other a little better."
Helga looked at the two. She had never really spent much alone time with either of them before, as Sheena kept her distance from Helga because the blonde had been a bully, and Helga had kept her distance from Nadine because Nadine was always hanging with Rhonda. Phoebe and Rhonda were the only girls who ever invited Helga to things, and Rhonda only did it regularly because of the time Helga crashed her makeover party looking like Phyllis Diller; it was better to know Helga was coming than to have her randomly show up.
Besides Sheena being nerdy and not liking violence, and Nadine's bug collecting and friendship with Rhonda, Helga really didn't know a lot about the two. Both Nadine and Sheena also tended to stay quiet when everyone was spending time together as a group. She'd been wanting to get to know the two of them better for a while.
A smile crept onto Helga's face. "Uhhhhh... sure. That sounds like fun."
" Okay, we'll see you about nine o'clock, Friday morning." After Helga got the address, the girls started off, Sheena joining up with the waiting Eugene. Nadine left in one direction, the nerdy duo in another, all three of them waving bye to Helga, who returned the gesture.
Sitting there, Helga was about to get back to outlining her play, when she had an idea. Her hand reached for the pocket she had her locket hidden in. No one's around. How about a monologue for old time's sake.
She didn't monologue much anymore, since Dr. Bliss helped her get her compulsive urges under control, but it was something she enjoyed doing, so... "Oh, Arnold. We've only spent a few hours together today, but you did so much for me. You defended my name when Geraldo gave voice to his detestation of me. Not only that, but you invited me along with you, wanting to spend even more time with me. You can't understand how much it hurt to turn down your offer. But when you learned I would be unable to join you, you-"
Helga was interrupted by the sound of heavy breathing. Helga didn't panic at the thought of someone discovering her secret, as she recognized the wheezing. She used to hear it much more often. Instead of retaliating with a backhand as she used to, she simply groaned. "Go home, Brainy."
"Awww..." As he managed to wheeze out his disappointment at her lack of violence towards him, he started down the bleachers and wandered off, Helga watching him go.
"What a weirdo." I would recommend him to Dr. Bliss, but a visit with her would require him to say more than five words an hour.
And with that Helga put away her locket and continued working, filling in details on what would happen in her play. After about ten minutes of work, she looked up and scanned the street for Olga's old convertible. Helga wasn't surprised not to see it, as she had given her mother a ballpark figure of when practice would end, and the time Helga had given her was probably still a good twenty minutes away.
At least her friends wouldn't see her get into Olga's car. Helga shuddered at the thought of being seen riding in the garish vehicle again. Olga had had her ride in it plenty of times when the two went to P.S. 118 while Olga was a student teacher there. With the flowers adorning it and how high the number on the odometer was, it was obviously a relic of the hippie era that Bob had cheaply bought, although he did make sure it stayed in good condition for his precious daughter.
About five, maybe ten more minutes passed with Helga working, when she looked up and saw a car had pulled up to the curb. It was a maroon Pontiac Firebird convertible, and even though it was an older model it looked like it had been kept in pristine condition.
Helga was immediately on guard. Why would they pull up next to a vacant lot? Maybe it's some spoiled rich kid slumming it. Her apprehension grew and her heart started to beat faster as another, even more nasty thought came to her. Or maybe it's some creepy pervert who saw a young girl sitting all by herself and-
Her thoughts were cut short, her heart nearly stopped, and her mouth dropped open as the driver-side door opened and her mother got out. "Helga, sweetie! Let's get going!" Olga called out as she waved to the dumbstruck girl.
Putting away her notepad, she walked over to the sports car, still shocked at seeing the vehicle in Olga's possession. Standing next to it, she just kept looking at it, not fully believing that it was real.
"Go ahead, get in." When her still wordless daughter went to open the front passenger door, Olga spoke again. "Get in the back, Helga."
"The back?! Miriam and Bob always let me ride up front!"
"I'm your mother, and I've read studies that show that until you're twelve or thirteen you shouldn't ride up front. Now please get in the back, Helga."
Helga grumbled as she got in the back seat. Even though she hated not riding shotgun, she had to admit it was still nice, especially when Olga pressed a button and the roof receded.
As they started off, Olga spoke. "Cool, huh? I wanted to get a newer car. That old convertible was fine to drive when I was visiting home every couple of months, but it started to become unreliable when I drove it to work every day, even with your granddad taking it in for routine tune ups. Instead of having a lot of work done on it, I decided to sell it." She shot her daughter a grin. "Not so much of a nerd now, am I?"
She must have heard me making fun of her at some point. "It... it is cool." Helga begrudgingly admitted. Then she smirked. "You're still a nerd though." Then a question came to her. "How did you afford this? You're a high school teacher, and you haven't even started your job yet."
Olga hummed. "Well, when I started college I had a good amount of money saved from the various competitions I won and performances I gave. Then, during my freshman year I took a couple of classes about investing, and I turned out to have quite an aptitude for it. Mom thought I should switch my major to something business related, but I had my heart set on teaching. I have, uh... dabbled in the stock market ever since, though, just as a little hobby."
"Dabbled?" Helga asked, curious.
"Oh, you know... bought and sold a few stocks here and there... the ones for internet companies have really taken off these last couple of years, for example..."
"How much have you made?"
"Oh... enough..." Olga was doing her best to be vague.
"How much is 'enough'?" Helga's tone of voice demanded a more specific answer.
"Oh, look, we're here." Indeed, Helga could see the entrance to the mall from where she was seated. Since Olga was being so evasive, she decided to drop the topic... for now.
"What's the game plan?" Helga asked as she got out.
Olga answered as she closed the top. "First, do you need any supplies for school?"
Helga nodded. "Yeah. Miriam was going to take me, but with Bob wasting so much cash on ads for his store, money's been tight."
"Okay, we'll stop at Roth's Office and School Supplies. Then we'll take you to Verizon and get you a new cell phone. We'll then grab a bite to eat before getting you some new clothes, and finally we'll pick you out a bookcase for your room." They started walking into the mall.
The preteen looked at her in surprise. "You're going to get me another phone?"
"Sure. I can trust you with one, and it will make me feel better if you get stuck somewhere. Just don't forget it at home like you did the time you and Harold got stuck at the chocolate factory."
Helga rolled her eyes. "Of course, the one day I leave it at home, you're sick and Mr. Simmons forgets how to properly do a headcount."
Olga jumped to the older teacher's defense. "He does his best. Since Mrs. Vandou was also sick, Wartz pushed him to chaperone both fourth grade classes alone, and he had to deal with Jordan sneaking-"
"Jordan?"
"You and your friends call him Chocolate Boy. Anyway, Wartz didn't want to pay to reschedule the trip, so Mr. Simmons basically had his hands full with what was at least a three person job."
The mother and daughter entered the mall. "Yeah, Wartz is a tightwad. I remember when Ms. Slovak and the rest of the teachers went on strike during third grade. He also gives out really unfair punishments, like when Arnold refused to name the culprits during the full moon incident." Right before Harold, Sid, and Stinky admitted to being the mooners, Helga had been getting ready to hunt down the perpetrators herself and free her beloved from Wartz's wrath.
Olga shook her head. "Most of the teachers dislike him just as much as you kids do. Mr. Hones, the high school principal, is a lot better, although he can be pretty airheaded at times."
Helga was surprised at Olga's words. "Wow. You jumped to Mr. Simmons's defense pretty quickly, but you're willing to talk this way about principals?"
"Helga, often times the teachers do not get along with the administrators."
With that, they reached their first destination. Olga needed some supplies as well so they stuck together and picked out what was needed. As they passed a shelf with some journals, Helga grabbed a couple, avoiding the pink ones despite it being her favorite color. Olga looked at her daughter, a knowing grin on her face. "What are you going to use those for, sweetie?"
Helga scowled. "Don't start. You know perfectly well what I'm going to use them for."
Olga giggled. "Fine, I'll stop." Until we get lunch...
After paying, the duo exited the store. Walking past the mall's water fountain and its statue of Halfoffius, Goddess of the Mall, they entered the Verizon store.
Olga allowed Helga to pick out her own cell phone. Helga picked out a flip phone that was basically an updated version of the one she had had from the start of third grade up until just a few months ago. Once they got her added to Olga's phone plan, they found themselves headed to the mall's food court.
After grabbing some hot dogs, they found a table where they could eat together. "So, Helga, I have a question for you."
"What?" Helga asked through a mouthful of food.
"Don't talk with your mouth full, honey." Helga rolled her eyes and swallowed the bite. "Yesterday, you told me about some of your antics that were caused by your crush. I just wanted to know: what do you plan to do in the future?"
Helga raised one side of her brow. "Plan? Getting beaned by a baseball and faking amnesia or breaking into a boarding house to retrieve something aren't exactly something I plan on doing in advance, Olga."
Olga lightly punched her daughter's arm. "I didn't mean that, silly. I meant, do you have plans on asking Arnold out, or otherwise letting him know how you feel?"
Helga nearly choked on a bite of her food. "Are you nuts?! I can't tell him how I feel!"
"Why not?"
"Why not? Why not!? I can't tell Arnold! What if he doesn't like me?! What if he laughs at me!?"
"Helga, you'll never know how he feels unless you ask. Even if he feels the same way, he may be too nervous to let you know. Who knows if Cecil would have actually gotten the courage to ask me out if I didn't tell him first. You might not even be here if I didn't take the initiative..." Olga's voice then took on a scolding tone. "Plus, Arnold would never laugh at you for asking him out. You know him better than that."
Helga looked down at her food, feeling guilty at thinking that way about her beloved. "I know. I'm just so ner-"
"YAY! I GOT THE JOB! NO MORE EARLY MORNING PAPER DELIVERIES!"
Olga and Helga (happy for the distraction) looked in the direction of the shout, as did the other people within earshot. Out of a store marked "Gary's Shoes" walked none other than Oskar Kokoshka, standing proudly.
As the Czech man noticed all the eyes on him, he turned red in embarrassment and started slinking off.
"Uhhhhhhh, okay...?" Olga turned back to her daughter. "Anyway, Helga, I wanted to make a deal with you. When we go to Macy's, I'm going to let you pick out whatever you want."
Helga was skeptical. "Anything?"
"Anything. Well... nothing inappropriate, of course. But yes, almost anything. In return, you have to at least try on some outfits I pick out. Deal?"
Helga mulled it over. Try on whatever dumb clothes Olga picks out? Ugh. But then again, she did say anything... If Olga hadn't been looking right at her, Helga would have had a nasty grin on her face.
"Alright. But I'm going to hold you to it." The daughter said.
"And I expect you to keep your end of the deal." The mother replied.
The two shook hands on it, and as they finished eating, they made their way over to the department store.
Selecting a specific mannequin as a meet up point, the two went off in separate directions. As Olga wandered over to look for clothing for her daughter, a man with slicked back blond hair, a nice suit, and a nametag reading "Luke" walked over to her. He looked to be about as old as her mother.
"Hello pretty lady. Luke Ventura at your service. How may I help you?" He asked in a suave voice as he looked her up and down.
Olga frowned at the lech. "I'm just looking for some clothes for my daughter. I won't be needing help."
Luke looked taken aback for a second. She has a daughter? Aw, damn. Oh well... she's still hot. "Well, ma'am, you're heading in the wrong direction. The infant and toddler section is over there." He pointed over to a bunch of clothing racks that had a large amount of baby clothes. "And I'm sure I can help you pick out the best items for your darling daughter."
Olga was getting tired of the guy, and figured the best way to get rid of him was being truthful. "She's not a baby, she's ten years old. Now, please, go away."
Luke looked at her, shocked. "Ten years old!? Jeez, you're older than you look!" The man started to walk away. "I remembered I have something I need to do anyway."
Olga watched him go, and as she resumed her search, she swore under her breath. "What an asshole..." I hope Helga's having a better time than me.
Helga swore loudly. "Dammit, why can't I find anything in my size!?" She was looking for rock band T-shirts. It seemed she had gotten really lucky with the old Black Sabbath shirt, as most of the shirts she had come across were at least a size too big. The only ones they seemed to have in her size were for groups like NSYNC. Helga would rather go to school buck naked than be caught wearing that crap.
As she searched through the rack, she eventually came across Ozzy Osbourne and Nirvana T-shirts that would fit her. Deciding to mark it as a win, she grabbed the shirts and went looking for her next target: a new jumper.
She still loved her old one, but she knew she would soon outgrow it. It was also getting a lot of wear and tear on it. She had worn it through various misadventures like baseball practices and boarding house break-ins, after all.
Finding a jumper she liked was much quicker. The one she found was pink, much like her old one. The neckline wasn't as low, and instead of it having a horizontal red line a little ways from the bottom, the red band instead ran along the edge, with a dark pink band right above it.
Next, she grabbed a few pairs of jeans, and then she was about ready to head back to the meeting place when something caught her eye. She saw a pink jacket. Walking over to it, she thought it looked good. However, she nearly choked when she saw the price tag. Almost leaving it, Olga's words came back to her. Well, she said anything... and we even shook on it. Grinning at the inevitable argument she was going to cause, Helga added it to her pile of clothes, and she started back to the planned meeting spot.
Olga was already waiting there, and Helga could see her mother was trying (and failing) to hide several outfits behind her back.
"Hi honey. What did you pick out?"
Helga showed her the various clothing items she had grabbed. Saving the jacket for last, she waiting for Olga's to tell her to put it back. She was almost disappointed when Olga simply looked at the jacket, nodded, and told her it looked nice.
Seeing her mother's nervous grin, Helga spoke. "Come on, show me what you got."
The first outfit Olga showed her was a blue shoulder-less blouse and a dark blue skirt combo, similar to the green one Olga had had when she was close to Helga's age. "I thought it matched your eyes."
Helga rolled said eyes, then gave the clothing another glance. "I guess it's not too bad. Next."
The next outfit was a green plaid dress with frills. Helga winced at the sight of it. That looks like something Lila would wear. Hard pass. "Uh, no thanks. Next."
Olga frowned. "Please, Helga, just try it on."
At her mother's pleading look, Helga groaned. "Fine. Next."
The final dress was black, with floral patterns running across it. "Hmmmm. Not my style, but not as bad as the previous monstrosity. All right... give them here." As Olga handed her the clothing, they made their way over to the changing room.
After Helga tried on the various outfits, Olga paid for the clothing (having put back the Lila-esque dress). After picking out a new bookcase for Helga's room at a furniture store and having an employee lug it out to her car, the duo headed home.
Several hours later, a young, brown-haired man entered the mall, and making his way to Roland's jewelry story, went up to an employee.
"Excuse me, sir. I was wondering if I could get this fixed here." He held out a necklace. "I bought it here a little over a decade ago, and the chain recently broke."
The employee took the item from the man's hand. "Yes, for a modest price we can fix it no problem."
"Merci beaucoup." The two men then worked the pricing out and when the item would be available for pickup.
As the customer left, the employee took a look at the pendant on the chain. It was in the shape of a half-heart. Curious, he opened it up, and saw an old photo of a blonde girl and the engraved words "Olga Pataki, Forever in My Heart."
Oooooo, wonder where that's going to go.
Anyway, Luke Ventura is not an OC, he's actually Al Bundy's coworker from the first season of Married... with Children. I figured he had a good ten years during which he could have moved from Chicago to Hillwood.
Next Time: Therapy