Ch 24- Downton Abbey At Christmas Time, Part II

December 22nd, 1918

"Hmmm." Carson moaned he woke to feel a huge weight a top of his chest.

He was half asleep and painfully tired. He wanted to roll over and just nap, or wake his wife with a kiss and steal a little piece of the morning to spend in bed with her and her alone. Instead he opened his eyes, seeing his three-year-old son staring down at his face. The boy was wide-awake and sat atop his chest.

"Hi Daddy!" He cried excitedly.

"Good morning." He groaned.

"Good Chwistmas Daddy."

"Happy Christmas my boy. I know it's early and you're excited its nearly Christmas week, but Mummy and Daddy need their rest would you like to get in bed and cuddle with them?"

At that moment Charlotte ran in squealing, her new doll in hand. They'd given the twins early Christmas presents the night before.

"Daddy, don't forget me Daddy!" She cried.

"Hmmm Daddy could never forget his bitty girl." He promised.

He was exhausted and sighed as the twins crawled all over them and found their place nestled together between their parents. Carson sighed; just the last thing he wanted was physical distance from Elsie. It was Sunday morning, they didn't have to be at Downton and he'd hoped for something a little less than distance between his wife and himself after she woke. The twins usually slept hours on Sunday mornings they didn't attend church and in some sense, he was displeased they'd chosen this particular Sunday to wake up and want attention. He watched as Elsie sighed, settling in with the twins even as she slept, as if their cuddling with her were the most natural thing in the world. The twins fell asleep quickly, Charlie pressed against his Dad's side sucking his thumb.

"Ni Dadda." He mumbled before drifting off. Carson sighed, disappointed but still grateful as he leaned down to kiss his son's head.

"Daddy loves his little boy." He whispered, hearing his son sigh. "He loves his boy very much."

…

December 23rd, 1918

"Dolly." Charlotte whispered, pressing her finger into the stomach of the cloth doll she'd been given as an early Christmas gift.

"That's right my love." Elsie whispered. "We're glad you like her."

Charlie and Elsie exchanged glances, delighted that their little girl was mesmerized by her present. The two sat in silence, glad to be together and alone in the warmth of their home at Christmas. It was something they'd waited, wanted, and

prayed for, for years. And while it was their third such Christmas, this one was particularly special because it was the first Charlotte and Charlie were really able to enjoy with them and the first they'd remember.

"Look at her eyes, does she have the same color of eyes as you, Charlotte?" Elsie whispered. The little girl nodded.

Carson watched his wife and little girl from over the top of the morning paper, his tiny son on his lap also trying to read the paper even as he played with his bright red toy airplane, which he'd gotten as his early Christmas gift.

"You'll be able to read soon my lad." Carson whispered.

"No Daddy no I just like the pictures." He shook his head, pointing to a picture of sinking ship before continuing to make airplane noises.

Carson, a man of another time, never supposed he'd grow up, then grow old and have a boy who played with toy airplanes and liked to watch grand ships sink. He studied his tiny auburn haired son as he played, leaning down to kiss his cheek. Charlie giggled.

All four Carsons enjoyed what they'd come to call the morning cuddle. After breakfast and before they went to Downton, the children would climb into their parent's laps to be held for a while. The twins didn't realize it was their mother's way of making sure they were awake in the morning, in addition to her wanting to steal more time with them. Today was Charlotte's morning with her mum and Charlie's with his da.

"Would you like to get quite good with the plane, my lad?" He asked and Charlie nodded. "Well," Carson continued. "I suppose that is the future."

Charlie nodded in enthusiastic agreement with this before stopping to look at his dad for a moment. "Daddy what's the future?" He asked.

…

"I know you're excited my lad and lass but you need to be calm." Elsie whispered. Charlotte obeyed, calming herself at once (or attempting to) but Charlie was having a harder time.

Across the room, Cora was having an equally difficult time with Ben, who was overly excited about giving the servants their gifts and couldn't wait to exchange presents with Charlotte and Charlie.

"Benjamin quit kicking, you're hurting mommy." Cora whispered, trying to settle him down.

Ben complied, not wanting to be put down, that was until Charlotte and Charlie came. When they showed up, he wiggled out of his mother's arms and hugged Charlotte tight, causing the little girl to squeal, and her father to bristle in discomfort. He started to clear his throat but Elsie stopped him when Cora got on her knees to address the twins. Elsie did the same so she could give Benjamin his gift.

"For Miss Charlotte Carson." Cora handed her a wrapped package.

Charlotte felt her mother wrap her arm around her and kiss her cheek as she and the boys opened their presents. The Carson's gave Ben a toy sailboat complete with a fake crew and he was excited that it could float.

"No, no Ben!" Charlie shook his head excitedly, "We'll sink it!"

Cora and Elsie laughed at this and Carson cleared his throat, beginning to worry about his son's obsession with sinking boats. Charlie received a tin of toy soldiers and an atlas, with which he was immediately taken.

"It's because you like the world!" Ben told him.

Charlie started to clap and almost dropped the book but Elsie, still on her knees with the children, caught it.

"Where's America?" Charlie hurriedly asked Cora, making it obvious he still wanted to go there.

Cora helped Charlie find America and showed him where she was from in New York and Ohio while Elsie and Ben proceeded to ask Charlotte about her gift. She'd been given a very nice bow that went with the dress Elsie had just made (but not shown Charlotte yet) and some doll clothes that were perfect for her new doll. If Charlotte were older she would've realized her mother and Cora had discussed the gifts beforehand.

"I hope you like them Charlotte, you missed the clothes when we play house."

The term playing house caught Carson's ear and he looked over at the small boy in disapproval, about to yell that he didn't want anyone to play house with his daughter. No one sensed his anger not even Lord Grantham with whom he was in the midst of conversing, but he was livid. It was a good thing that Ben had neglected to detail that Charlotte was always the mum, he the dad and Charlie the eccentric Uncle (in their mind patterned after a male version of Rosamond) because of course, he was Charlotte's brother. And there was the fact that Ben and Charlotte always pretended they were a Lord and Lady and Charlie a great adventurer who always came back to England with many tales to tell their children. This storyline felt natural for the three and one day they would understand why. Cora and Elsie knew of the children's little game and were careful to hide it from their husbands, one of whom was overprotective of his little girl, and the other, determined to have his son marry for money. Cora, on the other hand, thought it was lovely and felt something bigger in it.

Soon, the Carson's went on so that that the family could continue giving out gifts. Carson scooped his daughter up into his arms and took her over to look at the mammoth Christmas tree. Ben sighed, upset that the twins had left. He was lonely and often missed their company. He looked over at Charlotte sadly as she pointed up at one of the ornaments.

"Oh look at that." Carson giggled, noting that he and his daughter were under a ball of dangling mistletoe. He lifted her up and placed a kiss on her forehead. Ben watched from a distance as she giggled wildly. "Never forget Charlotte, that you are your Daddy's girl." He told her and she clapped, settling back into his embrace, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.

"No Daddy I won't forget that eber." She whispered, sighing as she pressed her cheek against his chest, hearing his heart skip a beat. She closed her eyes and paused, not realizing she'd remember these moments, and the loving embrace of her Daddy forever. "Daddy I lobe you."

"I love my baby girl Charlotte always." He whispered back.

Elsie kissed her son's cheeks, realizing they were under mistletoe too. He giggled and kissed his mother back on the tip of her nose.

"Happy Christmas baby lad."

"Happy Christmas mummy." He giggled, kissing her on the cheek this time.

"Mummy has a sweet gentleman of a little boy doesn't she?"

"Merry Christmas my love." Carson said, turning to Elsie, the twins still in each of their arms.

"Merry Christmas my Mr. Carson." She laughed into his mouth as he leaned in, kissing her deeply. Charlotte leaned over and kissed her brother quickly, she giggled and he spat in disgust.

….

Because the nanny was gone, Cora took all three children for half the day and Elsie took them for the other half, sticking them in the kitchen with Mrs. Patmore for a baking lesson. Several hours later, Benjamin was sent back upstairs for dinner and the Carson's stayed late to dine with the rest of the downstairs staff, after which Mrs. Patmore fed the twins dessert and stayed with them while their parents worked. They'd decided to stay extra late because they had a lot to see to in preparation for their days long absence. They were nervous-excited about the fact that they wouldn't be at the abbey for five days. How could it run without them? At the same time, they were thrilled about the idea of going off with their twins in private. Mrs. Patmore understood, but was upset about missing her godchildren over the holiday, and as a result spent the day spoiling them with treats, which the twins kept thanking her for with hugs and kisses.

Charlie was exceptionally thankful that Mrs. Patmore was giving him endless treats. He thought that the more he ate, the closer he'd be to getting tall like Daddy and so as a result, he'd been making every effort he could, as of late to eat.

"You don't spoil me with treats." Daisy observed as the twins began to munch on their third set of gingerbread cookies for the day.

"Well of course not: you're not three years old!" Mrs. Patmore spat. She sighed reluctantly, handing her gingerbread too, causing the grown girl to smile and Mrs. Patmore with her.

Actually. Beryl did have a surprise for Daisy but she was saving it for Christmas day.

It was snowing and freezing by the time the Carsons prepared to leave and the twins were falling asleep.

"There, are you all bundled up, chap?" Charles asked his son, buttoning up his little coat tightly. The buttons were so small Carson had a difficult time with them. Charlie nodded, his teddy bear under his arm, both of them ready to go home.

"Teddy cold too." He told his Dad.

"Don't worry. I'll make sure not a piece of fur on his body freezes, alright?" Charlie smiled looking up as his mother rushed into the hall his sister at her heals.

"No, no. They're not bundled up, not until they've got their hats and their gloves!" Elsie exclaimed, getting down on her knees in front of Charlotte. "Your turn for your coat my lass."

Elsie was hurried after a long day and wanted to get home. The twins were overtired and going back and forth between yawning and being hyper. Elsie handed Carson their son's hat and gloves, and he in turn, gave her their little girl's coat. They went through this routine with the twins every night and every morning, achieving it successfully only through the means of quick teamwork.

"Daddy I'm tired." Charlie cried.

"I know my lad." Carson said, noting that his little boy's eyes were growing very heavy. Carson affixed the wool hat securely onto his son's head and the boy giggled. Charlotte started to suck her thumb. Her mother grabbed her arm, pulling her thumb out of her mouth so she could get the coat on.

Charlotte just blinked at her mother as she started to ease the royal blue wool coat onto her arms. Elsie had made it over the last few months, it was too big for the girl and would fit her for several years, but it looked stunning on her, complimenting her auburn-red hair nicely. Elsie pulled the collar up tying the girl's scarf around it and tucking it back into the coat.

"Mummy cold."

"Charlotte you'll be fine, Mummy promises." She kissed her daughter's forehead. "Alright loves, blanket time." Elsie reminded.

Blanket time was always their last step in getting ready to go home and signaled to the twins that relief from being so exhausted wasn't far off.

Carson and Elsie grabbed their children's wool tartan blankets and wrapped them carefully around each child before lifting them into their arms. Elsie had gotten them several years before during their trip to Scotland, when the twins had been conceived. She'd just happened to buy two. Eight months later she'd given them to her newborn children as a gift. She'd loved the same blankets as a child and wanted to remind them that Scotland was part of their heritage just as their native England was. Charlie's blanket was predominantly red; Stewart plaid Charlotte's the famous blackwatch plaid.

"Good night loves." Mrs. Patmore opened the door for the family, handing each of the twins a candy cane.

They were delighted with it instantly, both squealing 'thank you' as she kissed their heads and bid their parents a happy Christmas. Elsie managed to hug Beryl, even with Charlotte in her arms, before they made their way outside.

"Candy Daddy." Charlie cried, excited. He was cold but now that he was so bundled up he found the freezing air exhilarating and was more awake than he had been seconds ago. His sister would not agree.

"Not until we get home, I don't want it sticking to your tongue." Elsie advised.

"Mummy cold." Charlotte cried, burying her face in her mother's shoulder.

"It's alright little love. We'll be home soon."

Charlotte winced, the biting cold causing tears to come to her eyes. It was a bit much for her. Carson was concerned, knowing that it was probably going to start snowing again before they ever got home. It was dark when they got inside the house. Carson put his son down and went to go build a fire as Elsie unbundled the twins and herself.

"Would my babies like to have your candy canes and some hot chocolate before bedtime?" Elsie asked. The twins yawned at once, nodding their heads quickly in agreement to her proposal.

Charlotte yawned again, almost confused when she took her mother's hand and she led them up the stairs.

"Alright little loves, pajamas."

The twins were never so glad to put pajamas on as they were now. Charlotte snuggled into the warmth of her nightgown and struggled to put thick wool socks on her tiny feet as her mother helped her brother with his sleepwear. She couldn't quite manage the socks and before she knew what was happening, her father had arrived and put them on right.

It was later than usual and the twins were confused as to why they were still awake, they knew though that it was Christmas time and tomorrow and the next day would both be very special days. Charlie was exhausted but remembered that his father had told him to wait a few minutes while he and his mother settled in and changed their clothes. The twins thought they were tired but couldn't comprehend the level of exhaustion their parents felt. Even so, Carson and Elsie had sort of dismissed it; too eager to spend time with the twins on Christmas and later a little time alone. Charlie sat with his sister at the little table where the tea set was kept. He didn't particularly like her toys but was too tired to go to the other side of the room and do much with his own.

"Tea, Charlie?"

He didn't answer, wanting to remind her that Mummy had promised hot chocolate and candy canes and it was why he was staying awake in the first place.

Carson watched his wife as she changed into her night clothes, her bare back to him. He studied her silhouette carefully. It had been two and a half months since she'd told him of her suspicion that she was pregnant, and yet there'd been no visible change in her. He sighed, supposing she'd been wrong after all. She would've told him by now if she were; and certainly, he would've been able to see it in her.

He was disappointed to the point where he started to feel a tiny bit heartsick. Sure it would've been overwhelming, with three children under the age of four…but found himself wanting to do it all over again. He wanted that third baby, just as they'd both been eager to have five. They were getting older though, too old for that sort of thing as a matter of fact. He supposed that perhaps it wasn't pregnancy she'd suspected, but something more natural that accompanied her age.

'It wasn't met to be.' He thought. 'Perhaps that's all right. I have my love and my two, I was not even supposed to have that much.'

Elsie jumped when she realized he was staring at her.

"Charlie." She giggled. "What are you…"

He smiled warmly. "Just thinking about how much I love you. That is all."

"I love you too Mr. Carson." She walked over to him and kissed him softly. "Will you be down in a minute? I think it's story time for two wee ones across the hall."

"I would love nothing more." He smiled.

Elsie took the twins downstairs and put milk on the stove for the hot chocolate she'd promised them. Each twin went and grabbed their blanket, wrapping it back around them.

"Charlie. It's your turn to pick a story for your Da to read." She told her tired son.

Carson and Elsie had tons of books for the children and Carson had decided to teach them to read at a young age. The twins didn't know it but he planned on starting soon.

Charlotte looked up at the tree in the corner and all the presents underneath it. It of course wasn't as spectacular as Downton's tree but it was lovely all the same, and more than what many people could hope for. Elsie turned around from her place by the stove and watched her children joyously; barely able to believe she'd been blessed with them.

"Daddy!" Charlotte cried, rushing to her Dad and raising her arms when he came down the stairs. He chuckled and picked her up.

"That's my girl." He whispered, kissing her cheek. Charlotte's affection brought immediate healing to his heart over the issue of the supposed third baby.

"Charlie did you ever find anything you wanted your Da to read to ya?"

"Yes Mummy look it's a nice story."

"I'm sure it is lad."

The family of four climbed into the armchair together. Charlotte yawned nestling her head into her father's chest. Charlie lay back against his mother; holding her hands in his own and beginning to listen carefully to the story. The twins sipped their hot chocolate as they listened, growing increasingly sleepier as time went on.

"Do you think we should?" He whispered.

"Yes I think it's about bedtime."

The twins were more than half asleep when their parents got up from the chair and put them to bed.

"Hmmm not sleepy." Charlotte mumbled against her father's shoulder.

She appeared to be completely asleep. Her eyes were closed tightly and her lips were puffed out in an adorable pout that made her appear to have been asleep for hours. Charlie looked much of the same way and clung to his mother in his sleep. Carson and Elsie climbed the stairs quietly, placing each of the children in their beds.

"Goodnight my lad, my lass." Elsie said, kissing Charlie's cheek and tucking him in first with this comforter, and then with his tartan blanket. It was freezing and she pulled both up to his neck. She paused for a moment watching as the little boy began sucking his thumb as he drifted off. "Mummy loves you my lad." She whispered, kissing him again.

"Happy Christmas." Carson said, smiling brightly as he did the same with Charlotte. "Happy Christmas my precious little girl."

"Dada." She mumbled under her breath as he left her side.

"Mummy and Daddy love you very much." Elsie added as they switched places; he went to Charlie, she to Charlotte.

"Ni-ni my mama." Charlotte yawned so fully it almost knocked her out.

"Goodnight my love."

Carson and Elsie left the room hand in hand, stopping outside of the twin's door when he wrapped his arms around her and placed his forehead against hers. She stood on her tiptoes to kiss him, remaining in his embrace as he kissed back, hugging her tighter. He wanted to pick her up and take her to bed, but something inside told him to be gentle instead.

"It's a miracle." She whispered, her heart doing a kind of tug of war.

Part of her was very upset again over the loss of her pregnancy. If things had gone according to plan, she should be spending the holidays noticeably expecting now and she felt pitifully empty inside instead of full of new life.

But at the same time she was happy, overwhelmed and thankful that her twins were there, had survived their flu and were thriving. This was the Christmas she'd been waiting for, for so long: to be alone with her husband and children and even after more than three years; she still couldn't believe they were there, all together. Elsie told herself to pull it together, and not let her sorrow spoil it.

"It's such a miracle. You're my miracle." He beamed, still unconvinced she hadn't been pregnant.

He wanted to know more, to question her again but decided not to press it: not then. Something about the whole thing bothered him and he couldn't figure out what it was. Nonetheless he smiled, touched when tears sprung to her eyes at his words.

"Oh my Charlie you're for certain my miracle."

"I love you Mrs. Carson, lets go downstairs, and have a nice dance and a bit of wine by the fire before we retire for the evening. I'll even tell you a story."

"What story is that?" She asked when he took her hand and began to lead her down the narrow steps.

"It's a story about every Christmas you've used to steal my heart away."