Ch 31- The Summer of 1919
June 1, 1919
Elsie smiled deeply, listening as her husband's formidable voice raised an octave, creeping into a soft whisper as he read to their little girl. Charlotte was an inquisitive little thing who never tired of learning, and hearing new stories. This one she found funny rather than intriguing. The four-year-old giggled a mile a minute, burying her face in her father's chest. Elsie blushed, looking down at the roses she was tending to as she listened to her husband and daughter, the sound of their mixed laughter precious to her: she could've never known, just a few years ago that life could be so perfect.
"Daddy. Read more, read more!" She begged excitedly.
"Mmmm." Carson considered, kissing the top of his daughter's head.
He adored Charlotte. She was the apple of his eye and in many ways, the love he'd been waiting for his whole life. He doted on her, and was immensely proud of her in a way he never had been of anything else… that's not to say that Elsie wasn't the love of his life, or that he didn't also adore his son to the utmost degree, but with Charlotte it was different. He felt protective of her in away he'd never thought possible… Charlotte was his mini Elsie.
"I think it's your turn to read to Daddy." He told her, picking up another book. Charlotte looked up at her father, her tiny eyes wide. "You can do it, I have faith in you."
Charlotte took a deep breath not realizing her mother was listening from outside where she kneeled, tending to the roses just below the cottage's open window. Carson had been fast at work teaching both the twins how to read. Elsie thought it was a bit too soon, but approved nonetheless.
"Once upon a time, there were four little rabbits and their names were Flopsy, Mopsy, C-c…"
"Cotton-tail."
"Cotton-tail and Peter."
Elsie looked up at the sky when she felt a raindrop land on her head, realizing it was about to start pouring. She gathered the roses she'd just cut and quickly headed inside, beginning to shut the windows.
"Very, very good my love." Carson praised.
"Yes Charlotte, I heard you, mummy was very impressed."
Charlotte squealed, proud of herself: she knew it wasn't typical for someone her age to be able to read. Benjamin was going to be a Lord and he couldn't read! Daisy was a grown up and she could almost read better than her. And Charlie, he just wasn't nearly as enthusiastic about the whole thing as she. Often, Carson had to force his small son to partake in the lessons he gave, which why he was upstairs now building a fort.
Charlotte had a sense of pride about her abilities but not self-importance. Elsie hadn't understood at first why Carson had decided to teach the twins so young and nearly two years before they'd begin school, but she'd understood his reasoning at once when he looked at the twins one night while they played quietly by the fire and said:
"Because oh my aren't they special?" He'd said. "Times are changing and I'm always the last to admit that but, she is smart and he is eager. They're ours and what we have to give to the world Mrs. Hughes, so our girl and our boy will have every advantage we can give."
"Daddy should I keep reading?" Charlotte asked.
"If you'd like, but I need to help your mummy with dinner."
"No, no." Elsie said. "Your mummy is just fine, just keep reading my little one."
Truthfully Elsie liked the sound of her little girl reading and wanted to just keep listening. After tonight, the cottage would get very quiet for weeks and she wanted to hear her baby's voices as much as she could before they left.
"Very well." Carson cleared his throat and Charlotte continued reading, only needing help with a few words here and there.
"Mama I help you!" Charlie said excitedly as he came down the stairs, his teddy bear in hand.
"You will!" She smiled, getting on her knees as her son ran into her arms.
She kissed his cheek and hugged him tight, pausing as she stuck her nose in his hair, making a point even to smell him before he left. She moved to pull away, but he resisted still clinging to her.
"Mummy loves you so much, my baby Charlie." She whispered, gently pressing her nose against his.
"Mama me love you too!" He whispered excitedly, his eyes sparkled as if this were a new discovery. "Mummy you hold me!" He reached for her.
Still on her knees, Elsie pulled him on her hip; amazed she could still do this while so pregnant. But Charlie's place there didn't last for more than a moment before he fell out of her arms and back on his feet. He tilted his head, looking back, perplexed at her belly.
"My mummy." He accused, pointing at the baby.
"My Charlie I wish I could hold you but the baby's too big now. Mummy is sorry."
Charlie made a face, still staring back jealously at his unborn sibling.
"Mummy will hold her lad as soon as she can." She kissed his cheek, getting up to start dinner. He didn't notice this was hard on his mother that she winced and braced herself, raising from her knees very slowly.
"My Charlie boy." Carson interrupted. "How about you come read too?"
He'd been planning on making the child read all afternoon. Carson held out his arms but Charlie shook his head, burying his face in his mother's skirt. She put her hand down over the back of his head, running her fingers through his hair, holding him close and not acknowledging her husband's request.
Carson sighed. "Come now, it's your turn to read to us and it's a new story, one about far off places, so there's no one more perfect to tell it than Charlie, now is there?" Carson gulped for a moment, wondering if he'd ever tell his son that his sense of adventure came from him, that in the days of his youth he too had wanted to see the world. "It's about New York." He tried to tempt his son. The little boy slowly looked up from his mother's side and agreed to try to read.
…
"We have some news for our lad and lass." Elsie said nervously as she and her husband sat across from the twins after dinner.
It was late now and the fire roared in the hearth. The twins were getting tired and were almost ready to go to bed. Elsie felt guilty, realizing they should've told them earlier in the day and worried the news might cause a sleepless night.
"Yes. You are going to go to London, with the family." Carson told them.
The twins tilted their little heads in confusion. They'd only ever been to London with the family once before, when mummy took them to see daddy for a couple of weeks the previous summer. Usually, daddy went and they stayed with mummy and Mrs. Patmore at home, yet other times daddy stayed and Thomas went in his place.
"Are we all going to go?" Charlie asked excitedly, thinking about seeing London with his dad.
"No m'lad. Just you and Charlotte will be going nanny and Lady Cora and Anna will be there to take care of you."
"B-but mummy." Charlotte protested, tears filling her eyes.
Both twins looked to their father in confusion, hoping he'd help them.
He sighed and Elsie spoke. "We want you to go and have a good time with Benjamin, Anna has promised me she will take you out and play with you..."
"And best yet, show you the city." Carson added.
"But why can't we be with you?" Charlotte asked.
"Auntie Patmore!" Charlie cried, wanting to stay with her instead.
"Oh my loves, mummy and daddy will miss you so much. If it weren't during the summer you'd just be staying at the abbey for a few days with Auntie Beryl or with nanny but…"
"But you're going to London because mummy needs to get ready to have the baby." Carson explained.
"And Auntie Beryl is going to be there when it's born and so…"
"Mummy we could help!" Charlotte offered.
"Yeah we could hold it and stuff." Charlie sniffled.
"Oh my loves, mummy will miss you so much. Please don't cry. It hurts her heart to have to send you away."
"Why do we have to go because baby is coming?" Charlotte asked, as her brother wrapped her arms around her and her father reached out to dry both his children's tears.
"You can't be here because having a baby is very hard." She admitted. "It would be better for you if you were in London, but mummy promises that she'll have you come home as soon as she can after, and when you do, you'll have a brand new baby brother or sister to play with, doesn't that sound nice?"
The twins paused and then started to cry again, causing both their parent's hearts to sink. Carson felt sick and Elsie started to cry.
"Mummy doesn't want it this way."
"Aunt Isobel?" Charlie questioned.
"No m'lad, she's going to help me get our baby into the world, just like she did with you. But we're very lucky we have people to help, who will care for you: you don't want to be here when mummy has the baby she promises you that."
"Why?" Charlotte asked, drying her tears. She cuddled close to her mother now and Carson put Charlie on his knee and hugged him tight from behind. The boy blubbered and turned around to face his father.
"Because it's going to hurt mummy a lot." She confessed, not really wanting to dwell on it or explain further.
"Oh no!" Charlotte cried. Both twins turned to her, concerned now. "Mummy cry?"
"Yes Charlotte, mummy cry."
"Did we hurt you mummy when we were borned?" Charlie was worried, and the question surprised his father.
"Yes my love you did. But it took nothing but having you in my arms for me to fall in love with you forever and it will be the same this time, only mummy and baby need some time to work out her being born and living in the world. She had that time with you both and now its her turn."
"Mummy?" Charlotte asked.
"Hmm?"
"Question!"
"Me too, me too! Mummy who's older?" Charlie asked.
"Yeah!" Charlotte interjected excitedly.
The twins had never thought much about this before, but suddenly supposed that one of them had to be born before the other. The Carson's exchanged worried glances wondering if it was all right to disclose this to their children at such a young age. Carson shook his head no, thinking it'd start too many arguments between the two, especially if Charlie knew he was the little brother.
"That is a discussion for when you're older." Elsie informed.
"Awwww!"
"Mummy why?!"
"Charlotte, what was your question?" Carson asked, trying to move the conversation forward.
"Mummy, how's the baby going to get out of there?" She pointed at her mother's stomach.
Carson and Elsie looked back in shock at their daughter's question. Carson was horrified, this was almost as if his baby girl had asked the opposite question: 'How did the baby get in there?' Meanwhile, Elsie was having a hard time wrapping her mind around her daughter's words. She'd given thought to it before of course, but with the date impending, and the baby still growing, she really wondered how the baby was going to get out … and the idea scared her.
…..
The next morning came far too quickly for everyone's tastes. When they got to the train station, Carson and Elsie got on their knees to say goodbye to their twins, not believing it was even happening. Charlotte was shaking, Charlie was on the verge of tears and both their parents felt sick.
"Try to have a good time m'lad." Carson said to his son, putting his cap on his head. "You're a smart, brave boy. I know you want to see far off places one day, my lovely lad this is just the start of your adventure." Carson smiled half-heartedly, anxious about letting the boy go and about to tear up. He was so very little, and at the heart of it, he wanted to spend the summer playing with his son.
Charlie was kind of encouraged by his father's words but really didn't want to leave him. "But daddy I miss you!" He cried.
"Oh my Charlie, I'll miss you too my son! And when you come home we'll spend a lot of time together, I promise."
"Cricket daddy?"
"Yes cricket my son." Carson managed to laugh softly. He hugged him tight and kissed his cheek. Charlie laid his head on his father's shoulder.
"Daddy no replace Charlie?" He asked sucking his thumb.
"Oh no, no little boy." He whispered. "There's only one little Charlie named for his daddy."
Charlotte's heart was beating fast and she found she couldn't look at her mom if she wanted to hold back her tears, so she focused on the feeling of the baby kicking vigorously against her tiny hands. She wished the baby would move over or simply disappear so she could hug her mother properly. She wanted so much to be held by her and never let go.
"I used to hit Charlie and Charlie used to hit me, but baby just hits mummy." She paused.
As the baby grew, Elsie was noticing distinct differences between her pregnancy with the twins and her current one and knew without a doubt she wasn't expecting twins this time. Her husband was still skeptical and would soon convince her she should be too.
"Mummy your tummy's very round. I'll miss it."
Elsie giggled at her daughter's words and took her in her arms as best as she could, kissing her forehead. "It should be my love, there's a baby inside of it and the next time you see me well…" Elsie paused, suddenly fearful that she might not make it through labor or see her twins again. She took a deep breath; knowing she couldn't think, like that. "When you see me again there will be a baby for you to meet: and you and I will spend some time together lass."
Suddenly the train's whistle blew and the conductor called for everyone to board.
"I'm sorry." Cora said, leaning down to the twin's level.
She and Robert were there, waiting to collect Charlie and Charlotte and take them onto the train. They understood that the twins did not want to go and wanted to help make the transition easier. The Carson's hugged each of the children several seconds longer, the twins switching back and forth between their parents several times before the conductor made the last call. Elsie kissed Charlie and Charlotte as Robert and Cora took their tiny hands.
"Say goodbye to mommy and daddy and good luck too." Cora instructed.
"Bye." The twins waived sadly.
"Good bye my loves." Elsie cried, her husband helping her up.
Lord and Lady Grantham each took a twin as they boarded the car, trying to soothe the sad, frightened children as they all bid farewell to their parents.
"Oh Charlie I can't." She cried, tears streaming down her cheeks as they watched their children through the window.
The twins settled into the car with the family, each climbing into a seat next to the window so they would wave goodbye to their parents. Elsie watched carefully as Cora took Charlotte on her lap and began whispering something to her. Carson waived and Elsie blew several kisses as the train lurched forward and slowly made its way down the track and out of sight.
"Don't cry." He soothed.
"Oh my babies." She cried. "Did we do the right thing?"
"We did the right thing." He said, rubbing her lower back softly and turning her around with him.
"I want you to start going with me." She said, sniffling as they walked. "I go in the afternoon tomorrow."
"Hmm? To where?"
"To Dr. Clarkson's." She said, rubbing her side. "Nothing much happens there; it's mostly about the baby's heart and when he's going to be born. But you'd want to hear your baby's heart wouldn't you Mr. Carson?"
…
"Are you okay Charlotte?" Cora whispered as the boys gathered around Robert who was unveiling a new toy he'd bought and thought might entertain them on the train.
Even Mary and Edith were focused on the toy Robert had brought but Charlotte remained in Cora's embrace. She paused for a moment, sucking her thumb now instead of answering the lady. She wasn't much interested in the toy or anything else and remained quietly on Cora's lap.
Cora continued. "Charlotte, I just want to let you know that your mommy loves you so much, you know that right?" She nodded. "She'll miss you too. And I will be here for you and Charlie, just like mommy would, while we're in London and any time you ever need it Charlotte."
Charlotte nodded, saying little else and but beginning to think hard on what Cora had just said, almost understanding how significant it was that she would be there anytime she ever needed her. Charlotte squeezed the woman's fingers softly in reply.
…..
"I'm sorry to call you over now with the twins going away this morning." Isobel said, clasping her hands together as she hurriedly let Elsie into the house. "I'm afraid she's acting rather irrationally and in haste."
"What has she got up to now?" Elsie inquired as Isobel's maid took her bag.
Isobel stopped, her hand on the doorknob when they reached the sitting room. "Perhaps it wasn't best to ask you to come in your condition either, she's acting out of desperation and it will no doubt be upsetting."
"Mrs. Crawley I don't really see an alternative, other than her acting in haste."
"I suppose not. Well, I we mustn't delay the inevitable … if you're sure you're ready."
"I'm sure." She nodded, knowing that whatever was behind the door would need no explanation.
Elsie was a little surprised to find the Bryant's there in Isobel's sitting room with Ethel and little Charlie, who'd grown quite a bit since she last saw him and seemed very interested both in the new surroundings and in all the people. He recognized Elsie instantly and smiled a little from his place on his mother's lap. Isobel sat Elsie across from Ethel and adjacent from the Bryant's. Both women could sense the tension in the room, and the discontent created by the conversation they had just walked into and as a result were hesitant to sit down.
Greetings weren't even exchanged before Mr. Bryant went back to work insulting poor Ethel. In those short few minutes, Elsie and Isobel got a good taste of the man's character and heart and were unsettled by what they found there.
'Surely.' Isobel wanted to cry out. 'You couldn't think of giving your son over to a man like this: to become this.'
Instead, Isobel handled the bulk of the mediation between a frayed Ethel and Mr. Bryant. Mrs. Bryant tried her best to remain calm, obviously shaken by her husband's continual harsh words about Ethel's path in life. And Elsie struggled not to be sick all over the floor. She knew she'd encouraged Ethel to do this, because it was the right thing for her: she knew it. But the babe under her own heart didn't make things easier emotionally. He or she did somersaults inside her, kicking frantically every time Mr. Bryant spoke.
'I don't like the man either.' She wanted to say.
If she didn't know better, she'd say her baby were in a panic, it had, after all already been a very emotional day. Elsie felt a little betrayed when Isobel got up to get some tea, taking Ethel with her. At this point all the upset was getting to her. She'd come here in turmoil about saying goodbye to her own children, and now she found herself even more stressed over Bryant's attitude, his tone of voice, his meanness and finally the weight of Ethel's decision. What if she'd steered her in the wrong direction all this time? She'd done all she could do to help up till now and she'd known it was not enough.
All her emotion manifested in the baby's intense reaction to this chaotic scene. Elsie took a deep breath, thinking she'd say or do anything to calm the child that wrestled inside of her. For a moment she even thought she might be in labor and considered that she might ask Mrs. Crawley for a music box and a lie down before venturing home, just to be sure. Even so, she watched the Bryant's interact with Charlie, feigning a small smile.
'Ouch!' She almost yelped, this time pressing her hand to her side.
The baby's kicking, felt much like nagging. She wondered if somehow, her baby was trying to discourage her from allowing Ethel to go through with it. She wasn't completely comfortable with the idea, but unlike Mrs. Crawley, she understood that it was the best alternative. Elsie was stuck in her own thoughts for a few moments, the idea of a mother giving up her child crushed her, especially now that she currently carried one of hers inside her. She couldn't imagine allowing anything in the world to separate her from that baby. In that moment she felt oddly better about the twins, who were not gone forever but off with people she trusted. Elsie almost cried out again when she felt another strong kick, this time she started to wonder if it came from four feet, not two.
"Mrs. Hughes." Some people outside the house still knew her as Mrs. Hughes.
Elsie looked up, surprised when she heard Mr. Bryant say something she hadn't really expected to be spoken to.
"Oh? It's Mrs. Carson actually." She hadn't wanted Mr. Bryant to get the idea that she wasn't married, not that she cared much about what he thought of her.
"Like Carson, Lord Grantham's butler?" Mrs. Bryant asked excitedly.
"Yes ma'am he's my husband."
"Thank you for watching after our Grandson Mrs. Carson, for making sure he was alright when he was with…that woman."
Elsie was unsure of what to say for a moment. She couldn't very well honor his disgusting opinion by saying something like you're welcome. Instead she decided to stand by Ethel.
"She was a good worker and a wonderful mother."
Elsie wasn't normally so bold but found Mr. Bryant disgusting. She saw him bristle at her comment but Mrs. Bryant smiled over his shoulder, seeming to agree with her. She wanted to press further, knowing that Cora wouldn't take any complaint about her seriously, especially not in this case but she refrained. Her thoughts turned to her own twins and how she knew they would miss the little boy they'd grown accustomed to playing with.
"Charlie, my own little Charlie and Charlotte will miss playing with you."
"You let your children!" Mr. Bryant stopped in the middle of his speech, seeming to catch himself. Elsie wondered if he wasn't going to say 'You let your children around him.' Instead he gathered himself and continued as Mrs. Bryant pulled Charlie onto her lap. "I mean it was nice of you to let your children play with Charlie, considering…"
"Well actually, the Carson twins have known Ethel since they were younger than Charlie." Isobel explained, coming back into the room, Ethel at her heals. "Before any of these awful things befell her."
….
Elsie said nothing more throughout the whole exchange, save some soothing words to Ethel, and walked home with a heavy heart, feeling guilty both for her role in this and also for the fact that she was going home, her own child tucked safely inside her. Elsie walked for a while, trying to grapple, as a mother, with what had happened. She was devastated about being apart from her children for a matter of weeks, but couldn't imagine what it would be like to say goodbye forever let alone give them away to unkind people she barely knew. Elsie wondered if perhaps the feeling compared at all to her previous longing for a baby, or to what her miscarriage had felt like, but she knew it didn't, it couldn't. Letting her twins go and live far away with strangers, would be the only comparable feeling, and Elsie couldn't even let herself consider it. Meanwhile the baby's kicking subsided but the dull pain in her sides continued, waning little as she walked. She made her way back to Downton heavy hearted, and with the assumption that either this really was twins or she was going to have it very soon.
…...
Elsie's heart ached as she made her way through the abbey's back door. She was upset and longed for the soothing arms of her husband. She smiled sweetly, surprised to find him right there, waiting for her, when she arrived. She paused, noting he did NOT look pleased.
"Charlie?"
"I can not believe you went over there. I've banned everyone from doing so when she is there, and then my own wife…"
Elsie stopped, shocked at his words, wondering how he'd even found out. She didn't think word about these things traveled quite this fast. It would turn out the Bryant's had stopped by to see Lord Grantham and told Carson of her involvement and the whole ordeal when he answered the door.
"Well your son didn't make it any easier." She said, retiring to her sitting room.
"Charlie, he's in London by now, how did..."
"This one." She said, her back to him as she picked up the mail on her desk. She really did not feel like arguing.
"Oh .… ?" He was curious.
"Charlie he kicked me so hard I thought he was on his way!"
"Oh!" He almost panicked.
"He's a good soul, he didn't like the situation, or Mr. Bryant. Reminded me of his Daddy."
"Oh. You don't say?" He asked kindly, forgetting his anger with her for a moment. He wanted to know more, but was more worried about why she'd gone that day. "Elsie why did you do it? I asked you to stop helping her, I have a good mind to turn you over my knee!"
Elsie started to laugh. "I'm too pregnant to fit over your knee! And yes, you're really going to spank me when you've never raised a hand to me in over twenty-years of marriage?"
"Mrs. Hughes, I'm deeply hurt by what's happened. I never considered my wife a woman with no standards!"
"Mr. Carson, it isn't 1904, no one has your standards anymore! And what do you not want your children around me now?"
"Well… it does disturb me they've been around Ethel and that baby."
"That baby! What about this baby now? Do you want me to rip him out and hand him to you so that he won't have to be around Ethel? OH!" She yelped, doubling over a little bit.
"Elsie!" He cried, reaching to catch her. "My love what's wrong?" He asked, his heart racing, worried he'd caused her to go into labor with his stupid argument. He'd been half teasing.
Elsie closed her eyes tight, wincing, playing it up. She smiled suddenly, placing his hand on her side. He smiled in an instant and leaned into kiss her.
"I'm so very sorry, my Elsie."
"I love you no matter how stuffy and judgmental you are."
"Elsie I, I'm sorry I get upset about Ethel and her son. It's simply that you're my queen, and I cherish the honor you gave to me to keep." He confessed, tears in his eyes as he kissed her hands.
"Oh my Charlie." She sighed softly. "I love you so much for that, for cherishing my honor. It means the whole of the world." She told him as he leaned in to kiss her once more. "To your children and me. Charlie."
"My Elsie."
"Mr. Carson I think you might be right. I think I have two babies inside of me."
…..
"Sorry Mrs. Carson, just a little pinch."
"Ow!" Elsie almost yelled, wincing when Dr. Clarkson stuck her finger with a needle.
Carson cringed, watching as a bit of blood began to pour out of his wife's finger. Dr. Clarkson collected some of it and sent it away with the nurse before wrapping a tissue around it and squeezing it tightly to halt the bleeding.
"Sorry." He apologized again. "It's pretty standard now really. I know the twins are still very small but a lot has changed since you had them."
Elsie was about to ask what he'd taken blood for, and hoped it had nothing to do with the cancer scare but Carson spoke first.
"Actually twins are what brought us here." He said.
"Oh?"
"Yes, and bad pain in my back. I've been having this distinct feeling that I'm about to have another set or perhaps oooh." She winced. "There it is again. I have one every few hours."
"I see."
"It's the kicking mainly… I think it's far too strong for just the one, and some of the pain too strong to not be labor."
Clarkson paused for a moment, knowing exactly what the problem was. He was hesitant to just come out and say it, still embarrassed by what happened the last time. Carson had thought Elsie was having twins all along and Clarkson remembered ignoring or dismissing him every time he brought it up. He didn't want to repeat history, especially given that he'd been wrong the first time.
"Mrs. Carson ... the miscarriage. I hate to bring it up, but I do have to say it would be very extraordinary for one woman to have conceived three sets of twins. Alright, if you'll just lay back a few moments."
The couple was nervous as he began to feel her stomach. She winced a few times because it was uncomfortable. Clarkson didn't know what to say really, he couldn't tell, truly, if it was twins just like he couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl. Really, he only knew if the child was dead or alive, and if it was growing properly and he felt pressured by Carson's insistence on the matter.
He sighed. "First, it sounds to me as if you're having false labor, the body is preparing itself for the real thing. Unless the pains get stronger, and closer together you can rest easy and know it isn't real."
"It's not dangerous?" Carson asked.
"No, no. It just lets us know the time is nearing itself."
Elsie sighed with relief, ecstatic that the baby could come soon.
"And as far as twins… I really am not sure. It's too difficult to say at this stage." He admitted.
Clarkson knew something else was wrong and didn't want to waste another moment on the concept of twins. He couldn't speak to it and it didn't matter to Elsie's overall condition. Carson was about to protest when the nurse came back with a file. She left and he opened it. Dr. Clarkson paused for a moment, biting his lip; the couple could tell he was concerned about something.
"Something wrong?" Carson asked quickly.
"Your test results came back."
"For what?" She asked quickly.
"Blood sugar, Mrs. Carson. It would seem you have something known as gestational diabetes. It should clear up on its own, once the baby's born."
…..
The Carson's walked back to the abbey in silence. While worried about Elsie he was overwhelmed by, having just heard his child's heartbeat. He'd never heard anything like it in his life and the sound of the little heart quickly going thud-thud-thud-thud resonated soundly in his ears and his soul, making him feel somehow powerful and all at once weak in the knees. It made him love his wife and baby all the more; thinking about the child and its life in this way almost put him in a trance and he said nothing to Elsie until she squeezed his hand.
"Are you alright?" He asked suddenly. Elsie sighed as they walked hand in hand unsure what to think of her new diagnosis. Diabetes could be serious it was hard to imagine she had it and that it would go away after a short time. "Do you think it's dangerous?" He asked, clearly worried.
"If handled properly, no." She was already miserable and would deal with what she had to in the next month, but was relieved that the diabetes wouldn't follow her beyond the child's birth.
"I should've called ahead to Mrs. Patmore about the menu. This is her fault you know." He chastised.
"No it's that your giant baby has a sweet tooth … and a salty one too."
He laughed. "My giant baby?"
"Yes. I know for certain he's a Mr. Carson sized lad."
…
Three hours later Elsie sat alone in the servant's hall waiting for everyone to join her. She wasn't hungry at all but tired, in pain and already missing Charlie and Charlotte.
"Are you alright?" Beryl asked as she began to serve dinner.
She'd been overly concerned about Elsie's diet ever since she found out about the diabetes and was afraid to feed her anything. Beryl watched as Elsie took a deep breath, trying to focus on the little bit of pain she felt. 'Hopefully it'll be over in a minute.' She thought. The more she considered it, the more she agreed about her discomfort being false labor and not twins.
"Yes. I think I'm fine." She managed.
"But diabetes is very serious isn't it?" Beryl was clearly concerned.
"It's the baby's fault and explains a lot about his size for one thing."
"It's not twins?" Beryl asked, surprised as everyone sat down.
"Well we don't know for sure." Carson interjected.
"Of course it's twins, she always has a litter." Thomas muttered, opening his paper.
"Thomas!" Carson was enraged that he would say such a thing about his wife.
Elsie sighed putting her head down as she thought about the second set of twins she'd lost. Beryl watched as Carson took Thomas and threw him out the back door, telling him to have his dinner elsewhere. Normally, Thomas' snide comments were ignored, or frowned upon but now that it concerned Elsie, Carson lost it.
"It's hard to believe he was helpful that night." Beryl muttered, squeezing her friend's shoulder.
Believe it or not, Thomas had been immensely helpful to them when Elsie had had her miscarriage, in fact, Beryl didn't think they would've gotten through it without him.
"Everyone has their purpose Mrs. Patmore." Elsie sighed. "Unfortunately, his isn't to get along with people."
…
July 1919
"I miss mummy." Charlotte whined in her brother's ear.
"Me too." He yawned.
The children were exhausted. It was late at night and they were tucked in bed together, but lay awake staring up at the ceiling. It had taken a while, but the twins had adjusted to the Crawley's and their time in the city. Cora made sure they were not only cared for, but also, included and loved. She'd exposed both of them to finer things than what they were used to; bought them clothes, taken them to museums, let them come to dinner parties with Benjamin and so on. It was overwhelming to the twins and a new world they both quietly admitted they liked, a world they didn't know would one day be theirs. Even so, they both would've much rather been with their parents than here in London.
"I wanna go home." Charlie yawned again, closing his eyes.
"I wonder if we could figure out to call mummy and daddy?" Charlotte asked suddenly. Her brother's eyes flashed open.
"Yeah!" He almost yelled then bit his lip. "I think we could. I know the number."
"You do?" Charlotte was impressed. Her brother didn't pay much attention in 'school.' The idea that he'd committed the phone number to memory made her start to think differently about him. She couldn't do that. "What if we have to talk to an operator!"
"That's okay. I'll use a deep voice, maybe they'll think I'm daddy?"
The children snuck downstairs in the depth of the night, careful not to make much noise even in the midst of their excitement. They found the phone and pulled a step stool up to it, climbing up it and beginning the process of calling home, not realizing they were being watched. Thomas had come to London to fill Carson's shoes in the household not long after insulting Elsie about having twins again. He was in the process of closing up the house for the evening when he heard hurried giggling in the library and found the twins trying to use the phone. He chose not to intervene and waited around the corner wanting to see what they were going to do.
"It's ringing!" Charlotte cried.
"We did it!" Charlie clapped, almost dropping the phone.
"Hello?" Came a sleepy voice.
"Auntie Patmore!" They cried a bit too excitedly.
"Charlie, Charlotte what the, my heavens it's late!" Beryl was startled, wondering how they'd managed to call.
"We miss you but we miss mummy more." Charlotte admitted.
"Oh loves you know she's not here, she's home it's late."
"Oh." They whimpered.
"Daddy too?" Charlie asked.
"Yes. But I'm so glad to hear you, I miss you and they miss you … I'll make sure they call you in the morning. Now OFF TO BED!" She said sternly.
"Okay!" They said at once.
"We lobe you!"
"We lobe you auntie!"
The twins sighed in sudden sadness when they hung up but were at least happy to hear their auntie's voice. Both stopped when they heard someone clear his voice.
"Master Carson, Miss Carson, is there a reason you're still up?"
"Phone home!" Charlie cried.
"Want daddy." Charlotte bit her lip again.
Thomas sighed, pretending to be disappointed with them for a moment before picking them both up and putting them on his shoulders. "How about a bedtime story then, on the condition that you go to sleep."
…..
"This will have to do." Elsie sighed disappointingly, looking at the set up of their children's now very cramped room.
Several weeks after the twins left, she was bigger and more miserable than ever. She already missed her children more than she could bear to think about, and the news that they'd called looking for her last night made her heartsick. She wished she were in the condition to bring them home, or at least to go and visit them but it wasn't a good idea with the false labor being as relentless as it was. She was feeling up to less and less by the day and Clarkson thought the baby could come at any moment. Today they'd finally brought the cot into the room Charlie and Charlotte shared and put it against a far wall: it had dramatically changed the room.
"Elsie we never could've guessed that we'd have another…or that we'd have two in one shot to begin with."
The house had been a gift from Lord Grantham and at the time, everyone thought it was generously sized for the two of them, and one long-awaited child.
"No, although I'm mortified we could do that again. I don't think you're entirely wrong about twins. I think there's a chance."
"If we do." He sighed. "If we do we'll work it out. It's not the most spacious house but its not as if it's the smallest either."
"No." She admitted. He smiled, walking up to her and cupping her stomach in her hands.
"I love this babe Mrs. Hughes and I love you, we will find a way." He said, leaning down to kiss her. "You know what; I have an idea. Mrs. Carson, lets have bunk beds made. Two sets on each side of the far walls."
"Charlie that's four beds."
"I know but that way if they end up having friends stay, or we need the guest space or if this is twins... or if it's not our last..."
Elsie looked up in surprise. "Surely it'll be our last?" She raised an eyebrow but he wasn't sure.
"Oh Mrs. Carson. I don't know who we're having or what's to come." He sighed, looking down at her belly, his hands caressing it gently. "All I know is that it's a good way to be prepared for anything and that I have a surprise for you downstairs."
…..
Elsie was pleasantly surprised to find that he'd made her dinner, a sweet candlelit one at that. It'd been weeks since the twins left and despite talking to them on the phone almost every day she missed them so badly she'd been crying and Carson had been doing little things to try and encourage her. She knew Charlie and Charlotte were participating in a different world, attending parties, going to museums and fine shops… Elsie was glad for this but longed to have the children at her side. Moreover, she feared they'd have grown beyond her when they returned. She didn't realize yet, that nothing in their lives would ever compare to the way the twins felt about their parents.
"We haven't gotten too much time to discuss names Mrs. Carson." He said, beginning to pour a little bit of wine.
"Ooh, ooh Charlie stop, stop. I can just have a bit. I've been calling him Samuel." She soothed, smiling down at her belly. "It's a wonderful name."
He smiled. "If he is a boy, I am glad you should love to call him Samuel. It's a strong name, Samuel Carson and I happen to love it."
"It's a sweet name." She giggled. "And I'm sure he's my Samuel even so, I expect you have a name for a lass."
"Do you?"
"Perhaps. But I know you do and since naming the twins was largely me I think it's your turn."
"Well yes but…"
"I'd love to hear it."
"Lucy Carson." He said, relieved to get the name off his chest. He'd been thinking it over for a while now and holding it, close to his heart.
"Oooh!" She cried, delighted by the suggestion. "Oooh Charlie, Charlie I love it so much. Lucy Carson."
Elsie swallowed hard, part of her wishing she could have Samuel and Lucy.
…..
July 31st, 1919, 4 AM
"Oh!" Elsie awoke, setting up straight, a sharp pain in her lower back.
"What?! What?!" Carson panicked, waking suddenly.
"Charlie it…" She winced, taking a breath.
He was awake instantly and moved into swift action, jumping out of bed and running his hand through his hair.
"Do you think it's false again?" He asked, reaching for his pants.
"I-I don't know." She took a deep breath. "Ooh! It was strong enough to wake me though." She considered. It hadn't been that way with the false labor she'd been having, she'd easy slept through that, and with the twins, Isobel had tried to have her nap and she'd been unable.
"Should I get Mrs. Crawley?" He asked.
"Hmm." She shook her head. "I-I can wait, if this is real, it'll take some time and I can wait until the morning."
"Y-you're sure?" He asked and she nodded. "Only if you're certain…" He hesitated.
She closed her eyes and reached out quickly to take his hand. He clasped it tightly, looking back at the clock and realizing what time it was. He paused, studying her face, realizing with a sense of complete relief (and panic all at once) that it was fully real this time.
"Do you see what time it is?" He asked. She winced, looking over at the clock, smiling suddenly at the suggestion. It was July 31st.
"Happy anniversary Mrs. Carson."
"And happy baby to you Mr. Carson." She smiled as he leaned her forehead against hers.
Note: For those of you who are anxious for the birth, yes, it's finally happening next chapter!