"Thinking"
"Talking"
"Impactful word"
Shepard POV
Location: Unknown
Time: 2185 CE
"There. On the monitor. Something's wrong."
The hues of darkness gradually faded into more distinct colours and shapes as the sleeping woman opened her eyes to the world once again.
"She's reacting to outside stimuli. Showing an awareness of her surroundings."
Light. There was too much light, which viciously scratched at the retinas of her eyes, penetrating even the safe harbour of her eyelids. She blinked. Once... twice... waiting for the double shapes of her muddy vision to merge into one singularity.
There was also noise - low tones swallowed by a sea of humming, thrumming vowels, and syllables. Voices perceivable, but barely detectable.
She blinked again. Little by little regaining control of her overall perception. The stillness aggravated her, so Jane tried to move her head, finding the movement difficult to carry out. Was her head always this heavy?
"Oh my God, Miranda. I think she's waking up!"
There was a white-clad shape closing in on her at her left side, jump-starting her heart rate drastically. So she retaliated by choosing to turn right but there awaited her yet another shape, but this time darker. Who were they?
"Damn it, Wilson. She's not ready yet! Give her the sedative!"
They were speaking, she realized, as she flickered from one blurry shape to another. But it became increasingly difficult to make out what they were saying over the pounding of her heart in her ears.
Feeling breathless all of a sudden, she reached out for the brighter shape, which caught her hand but put it tenderly back down, "Shepard - don't try to move!"
Was that her name the figure had called out, or had it been a trick of her groggy mind? She watched it with fogged eyes move over her, finding the sounds coming from it rather soothing, "Just lie still. Try to stay calm."
"Heart rate still climbing. Brain activity is off the charts. Stats pushing into the red zone! It's not working!"
Too much. She found it suddenly too much of everything. Light. Sound. Smell. Oxygen. Her surroundings began to overwhelm her as if they were in on a race to see which one would get it done sooner. It was enough for Jane to change her mind about wanting to stay up, and venture back into a deep slumber.
She no longer wished to see.
She no longer wished to hear.
She no longer wished to be aware of anything.
And then, all of a sudden, the sounds began to dim, the brightness began to fade, sucking in air didn't feel as though her lungs would combust at any moment. It actually felt quite peaceful the longer she felt herself fading, and Jane embraced it.
Shepard POV
"Wake up, Commander!"
Something chafing nagged at the outskirts of her conscious, seeking her attention but she would not give in. She felt too comfortable to pay it any mind. But why would she? As long as she could remain in this state of quiet; a place where everything that plagued her existence felt so far away.
But even that had been chased away by a violent tremor that had her body swaying from one side to the other, of which she only now discovered the uncomfortable hardness once her body began to wake up in alarm. Another wave nearly swung her from the table and it was enough to warn her about the dangers of her surroundings.
"Shepard, do you hear me? Get out of that bed now - this facility is under attack!"
Blinking in panic, Jane forced her body into wakefulness, ending up briefly blinded as a result of giving her eyes too little time to adjust to the artificial lights above her. Clenching her teeth against the pain, she flexed her jaw, having to support it with her arm because of its stiffness.
Testing her strength, Jane struggled to lift her upper body on trembling arms, which was worsened by a sharp pang against her diaphragm that almost felled her. Jane vaguely noticed someone was talking to her, giving her instructions, of which most of it brushed past her ears as there were other things to worry about.
Her body hurt like hell, and wasn't it for the spiking adrenaline in her quickening bloodstream, she wouldn't have moved past this goddamn table.
Breathing through her own throbs of pain, she swung her sleepy legs off the operating table in one swing. The blood in them felt terribly stale and it showed in the way she wobbled to the locker the mysterious stranger mentioned. Although it felt like ages ago, her hands had yet to forget how the different claps of her armour functioned, and before she knew it, she was back in her armour.
Has it always been this heavy?
Still feeling a bit unsteady on her legs, she one of her arms against the locker while the other adjusted the pistol in her hand. Checking it over, she noticed something very concerning, "This pistol doesn't have a thermal clip."
The woman was swift with a clipped reply, betraying the irritation and haste with her tone, "It's a med bay. We'll get you a clip from- damn it!"
Sounds like the situation wasn't any better on her side as well. "Those canisters by the door are going to blow! Get behind cover, now!"
In the face of immediate danger, Jane ignored the unbelievable ache in her joints and ran for cover. Momentarily thankful for the short notice advice from the woman, for it had saved her from getting blown up. Jane held reservations about listening to some stranger, but she knew nothing about the current situation she had woken up in, so it was in her best interest to follow.
As it turned out, after a good portion of destroyed mechs, her survival was in the woman's best interest as well.
That was until she met a man named Jacob Taylor; a darker-skinned man in an equally dark, form-fitting light-armour suit - who had so earnestly offered to give her a quick run-down of what had happened and was happening.
She had been clinically dead for two years.
The Normandy had been destroyed by an unknown enemy.
And Cerberus - FUCKING. CERBERUS. - brought her back from the dead.
At this point, the only thing that kept her from putting the last bullet in her thermal clip through her head was the hope of meeting up with the rest of her crew that HAD survived.
These were facts she couldn't seem to wrap her head around at the moment— it was simply too much for her to deal with. So she did what she thought she was best and pushed it as far at the back of her mind as possible. At least until she would inevitably have to face the music after this mess.
Shepard POV
They were now on their way to another Cerberus station. The celebrity of pain inside her body also lessened with time as she became once more tuned with her flesh, though she still felt as if a stranger resided within her skin, but was replaced by an ache inside her heart that she was still too tired to face.
Miranda Lawson - the woman that had navigated her through the attack - and Jacob, kept asking her question about her life. Kept opening up wounds nobody should so bluntly pick at, and only for the idiotic reason of checking if it was still really 'her' - the Commander Shepard the Illusive Man wanted.
After the black-haired woman stroked the last thing off of her diminutive list, nothing but the thrumming of the engines could be heard within the shuttle, which in return, gave her more time to ponder over things that continuously orbited her brain.
Her heart might have felt heavy within the confines of her ribs, but it was nothing compared to what was happening in the head department.
Anxiety ran rampage, like an untamed beast. Her body screamed for rest, but her mind had another opinion. Leaving her effectively at the mercy of her own vicious thoughts, yet at the same time, the prospect of conversing with TIM's agents agitated her even more.
Inconspicuously as possible, she shifted for the hundred time in her seat, and Shepard made the decision to humour the chaos of her mind for it felt like the friendlier choice.
The ride seemed long enough for Shepard to fully acknowledge the reality of her current situation and the term 'unbelievable' had suddenly gained a new weight to her. However, she feared it was but one of the many waves of an incoming tsunami, threatening to drown her to the seabed of mental instability.
It did little to diminish the painful palpitations of her heart.
Why Cerberus? What did Cerberus want with her? What have they done to her when Jacob had said she had been as 'dead as dead could be'?
Perking up to see if the two Cerberus operatives were attentive to her restlessness, she regretted doffing her helmet so carelessly. But it was difficult to fight the overwhelming sensation of uncomfortableness.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
See, absorb, identify, accept it.
One thing at a time, Jane, one thing at a time.
Instead of facing the torrent that raged within her readjusting body, the redhead opted to concentrate all of her accessible focus into one thought process at a time. There were more important things to be at the forefront at the moment. The Illusive Man was anticipating her arrival. Whether he would do it in person or through any other means, Miranda didn't specify, but she would rather want to meet him any other time than now.
Nevertheless, as much as she deluded herself to think she still appeared as 'The Commander Shepard' she was known for, it wasn't that she also felt like it. Albeit her insecurity, she knew she would rather throw herself out of the airlock than let TIM have his way with her. No matter how much she owed him for his generous investment in reviving her.
Shepard may have been dead, but even the dead could remember.
Shepard POV
"The Illusive Man is waiting for you in the other room."
This was it, Jane thought. Admittedly, her mind had her in shambles and she tried to stride with confidence when she passed the black-haired woman who seemed to occupy herself with a nearby terminal. Without a back-glance, the redhead cautiously entered the lion's den.
And this time, the helmet STAYED ON!
Doublechecking the dimly lit room in case something decided to jump on her from the lengthy shadows, she waited with bated breath, it wasn't until a few silent seconds ticked by that she noticed a circular platform in the middle room, framed by a blue artificial glow.
Jane slowly approached it, and stopped only when she arrived in the middle. Within seconds her ears picked up the familiar, faint thrumming of technology. She regarded the next seconds with guarded anticipation and sooner than her mind had labelled the sound, incorporeal walls of orange rose around her and before she knew it, she stood before the Illusive Man himself.
Her eyes hadn't been given the time to scrutinize the sitting male in front of her, because as soon as the scan was completed, the man spoke her name in greeting.
"Commander Shepard." She heard him exhale the smoke from his mouth, a bit dragged out while he was rubbing at his temple from what? Exasperation? That his new favourite lap dog almost got killed before she even fetched him his stick!
She couldn't risk showing any type of weakness in front of this man, for she was sure he wouldn't hesitate to use it to his advantage. Not when he already had her in an unfavourable position by having her guess his motives behind her resurrection.
The lack of eye contact definitely gave Jane the boost in confidence to play a convincing act. His presence wasn't all that intimidating to her, but she still crossed her arms over her chest and shifted her weight on her left leg to match his leisurely posture before retaliating, "Illusive Man. I thought we'd be meeting face-to-face."
Again, thank God that wasn't the case, but well, there was no shame in putting up a bit of bravado.
He played with the cigarette in his fingers, fiddling it loosely between his forefinger and middle finger without fear of dropping it that only experienced smokers possessed.
"A necessary precaution," Shepard grinned at that, "Not unusual for people who know what you and I know."
Playing ambiguous, huh?
"And what exactly is it that 'you and I know'?"
"That our place in the universe is far more fragile than we'd like to think." He took another drag, quicker than the last one, "That one woman - one specific woman - might be all that stands between humanity and the greatest threat of our brief existence."
There was the faintest of a wince that she hoped the man hadn't picked up on as he talked about an enemy she had once fought against - Sovereign. It shouldn't come to her as a surprise to her that Cerberus had sniffed that out of the sea of lies the Citadel Council continued to feed the general public.
"The Reapers."
"Good to see your memory's still intact. How are you feeling?"
"Like I was born yesterday. Would have preferred death over this, to be honest," Shepard grimaced from behind her helmet. Feeling the stiffness of her face or rather, the entirety of her, as a comely reminder. The pain couldn't compare to the one she had felt hours prior, but it drained her of her patience to answer without merit of anger in her voice.
"Cut to the chase. What are the Reapers doing that made you decide to bring me back?" The arms fell to her sides to relieve her forearms of the strain of keeping them there. The man in front of her was also prompted into action as he stood from his chair before falling into an explanation.
"We're at war. No one wants to admit it, but Humanity is under attack."
The emphasis on 'Humanity' didn't escape her notice. Shepard bit her lip to prevent her from interrupting him, from expressing her disbelief to him that the Reapers shouldn't be returning so soon. Which would not only disrupt his flow, now that she had got him talking, but also reveal her desperation for clarity regarding her situation. That he chose to approach her and reveal his appearance was just an added bonus.
"While you've been sleeping, entire colonies have been disappearing. Human colonies. We believe it's someone working for the Reapers. Just as Saren and the geth aided Sovereign. You have seen it yourself. You bested all of them. That's just one reason we chose you."
Letting it fall into the hands of her photographic memory, she had a distant feeling that the time window for her questions wouldn't be there forever, so she saved the man's physical evaluation for later and focused on reaping as much as she could from the talkatively motivated TIM.
"If this is a threat against humanity, you need to mobilize the Alliance." A flash of Anderson passed her memory. And that mostly also entailed Hackett. Oh, the very silver fox that her heart missed and longed for in equal measure.
"They suffered substantial losses fighting Sovereign. They're rebuilding, still stretched too thin to waste resources verifying the Reaper threat. Blaming the abductions on mercs and pirates is easier. And more convenient."
"Fighting a war doesn't seem like Cerberus. Why are you involved?"
"We are committed to the advancement and preservation of Humanity. If the Reapers are targetting us, trying to wipe us out, Cerberus will stop them."
Noble, coming from him of all people, but by now that sounded like a very well-rehearsed line. If only they'd conduct all of their projects with the same ethical codex.
Oh, she would gladly tell him about her incidents with Cerberus, especially the ones pertaining to Rear Admiral Kahoku's death. How he had been forced to share a cage despite the ferocity of the creatures he was sealed in with, there were no signs of trauma to his corpse. The needle marks on his arm had suggested a different means of execution.
And what of Corporal Toombs? Were his capture and resulting torture also the doing of a rogue splinter cell? Or the settlement on Chasca whose residents had been cruelly impaled and turned into Husks? Jane had seen enough proof that brilliantly showcased how far Cerberus was willing to go in the name of science. He would find no support for his ideals in her.
"If we wait for politicians or the Alliance to act... no more human colonies will be left."
In spite of the many ways she absolutely hated Cerberus as a whole. This was one of the few instances where they were actually of one mind. Just remembering how she had consistently tried to convince the Citadel Council of the Reapers' involvement in Saren's persecution was enough for her to bring back the memories of hours upon hours of frustration.
"Sovereign was trying to harvest all life in the galaxy. Why would the Reapers target a few human colonies?"
"Hundreds of thousands of colonists have vanished," he answered as calmly as if someone explained the weather to her, "I'd say that fits the definition of 'harvesting'. Nobody's paying attention because it's random and the attacks occur in remote locations. I don't know why they've suddenly targeted Humanity. Maybe you got their attention when you killed one of them."
The scoff she released couldn't have been forced down, for it came from a place of disbelieving mirth. He pinned the victory over Sovereign on her as if she were the one who pulled the trigger in the first place. As if she didn't sacrifice eight frigates to save the Destiny Ascension. And the fucking - she didn't feel bad saying it - Council.
The only thing her ground team had managed to get done was fight with a possessed corpse of an ex-Spectre over the control of the Wards and reactivate the nearby Relay (and even that happened solely through Vigil's help). Weren't it for Hackett's timely arrival— actually, weren't it for many things —she wouldn't have even had a chance of victory.
They had just finished what Shepard had started the moment she promised to put Saren to justice. The credit went to the 2400 courageous men and women that had given their lives to save the galaxy when it was most threatened.
And here she was again, much to her displeasure, given adulation. Did she ever mention how much she DETESTED when people did that?
Good thing that some things stayed the same. If TIM wanted so desperately to talk about her, why not ask him more?
"You could have trained an entire army for what you spent to bring me back."
"You're unique. Not just in ability or what you've experienced, but in what you represent. You stood for Humanity at a key moment. You're more than a soldier - you're a symbol. And I don't know if the Reapers understand fear, but you killed one. They have to respect that."
Did he have any inclination of what he was talking about? Of course he didn't, he wasn't the one who got called a 'rudimentary creature' by Sovereign in the first place. Fear, in fact, emotions as a whole, were entirely irrelevant to a Reaper.
They were bloody machines for God's sake! Were the Geth frying their software at the sight of her? - NO!
They lapsed into a contemplative silence, the Illusive Man's convictions left out in the open. The man casually regarded her without portraying anything explicit, but behind his gleaming cybernetic eyes, she could perceive a certain victorious glint. As if he was moments away from dropping a royal flush at a round of poker.
She would have refused just for that alone but if even a fraction of what TIM had said held any truth at all. Then what other options were there left for her?
The galaxy thought her dead.
The Alliance Navy had surely called her KIA over the two years.
As much as she abhorred the idea of taking him up on his unspoken offer, perhaps her best chance to free herself of Cerberus was to play along... for now.
"If what you say is true... if the Reapers are behind this... I'd consider helping you." Incredulity dripped from every syllable she spoke. The words literally felt like swallowing acid in her throat and she couldn't help but slightly wonder about the many ways this decision would backfire.
He seemed to have anticipated her reluctance, everyone who had known her would have, considering her blatant animosity towards his organisation, "I'd be disappointed if you accepted any of this without seeing for yourself."
She watched him turn his back to her and vacate back to his office chair, "I have a shuttle ready to take you to Freedom's Progress, the latest colony to be abducted. Miranda and Jacob will accompany you."
Jacob, she could tolerate, but Miranda had straight-up sent her stares that would freeze hell over. Jane neither knew or cared, for that matter, what she had done to warrant such behaviour from the person who oversaw her resurrection, but whatever it was, she wouldn't apologize for it.
"Miranda killed Wilson in cold blood. Jacob's just a gun for hire. You expect me to trust them?"
The man scratched his forehead in admittance, "Wilson was one of my best agents. But he was a traitor. Miranda did exactly what I expected of her. And she saved your life in more ways than one. Jacob's a soldier, one of the best. He's never fully trusted me, but he's always honest about it. You'll be fine with them... for now."
Seemed like the end of this argument, and just to rile him up she wanted to act defiantly, the temptation was strong, but that wouldn't have amounted to much other than revealing the few cards she held close to her chest for later. He, for one, was counting on a later. Ostensible bastard.
"Is this a volunteer job, or am I being volunteered?"
"You always have a choice, Shepard. If you don't find the evidence we're both looking for, we can part ways."
She seriously doubted it would be that easy. His confidence in her return, however, irritated her indescribably.
"But first go to Freedom's Progress. Find any clues you can. Who's abducting the colonies? Do they have any connection to the Reapers? I brought you back. It's up to you to do the rest."
And with one touch to his interface, he ended the transmission, leaving Shepard positively fuming on her lonesome.
Shepard POV
They were on their way to TIM's resigned location in the promised shuttle. The atmosphere wasn't necessarily uncomfortable, but the forced conversation with Miranda had been. God, speaking with her was like pulling teeth! It wasn't as if Shepard was looking for a new friend, certainly not in someone working for Cerberus' best interest, but hopping into a mission with total strangers wasn't how Shepard had done things in the past. She was still very much the same in this regard.
So she made it clear that she limited her questions to the more approachable mercenary for the time being.
Contrary to the black-haired beauty, Jacob had shown such enthusiasm that Jane had to rudely interrupt him at some point during the conversation. It was still a mystery to her where he had gotten this preposterous idea that she would ever join Cerberus?
But they both were action-driven, and Shepard would do them both a favour to put in the same focus.
Her first priority was to look for survivors, just as she had said to Anderson before Eden Prime. Stepping out, she felt some sort of relief when her body still remembered the drill. The drill that had been screwed into her very bones through boot camp at the marines.
Eden Prime had been a graveyard, but Freedom's Progress was a ghost town.
Nothing seemed out of place. Weren't it for the small indications that somebody had resided here, someone new to the place would have gotten the suggestion it must have been only recently built.
"Seriously," Shepard thought in perplexion, "as if everyone just got up and left right in the middle of dinner."
The only thing that seemed to bring them the least of trouble was the dubiously active defence systems roaming the abandoned colony. Guarding the very people that weren't even there anymore. It felt more unreasonable to continue when any possible clues evaded them, but there was simply something fishy with this place.
Why else would the mechs and drones be online? Just like at the research facility Jane was forced to fight out of, someone must have activated them.
And that someone was what they were looking for.
Alas, but that was not what they found when they entered another apartment, prepared to find anything but four mingling quarians.
Guns were drawn on instinct but before any shots could fall, a female quarian in a purple enviro-suit got in-between the two groups, "Prazza! You said you'd let me handle this!"
Only by the voice did Jane recognize the person in front of her - it was Tali. The one and only Tali'Zorah nar Rayya, who had left the Normandy to return to the Migrant Fleet after their victory over Sovereign and the Geth.
Jane blinked twice, for good measure thrice, to confirm what she saw was not some twisted image conjured by her exhausted mind. Tali seemed to give her a transitory once-over too, but she seemed less convinced that the person on the other end of her team's scope was Shepard.
"Wait... Shepard?"
Before Shepard could confirm her suspicions, the quarian in a black suit who Tali called Prazza cut in, "I'm not taking any chances with Cerberus operatives!"
Tali, as much as she looked absolutely confused about the situation, was swift to put the hot-headed male into his place, "Put those weapons down!"
Jane already had hers collapsed onto her backside, wanting nothing (if not more) but to deescalate the sparks of a skirmish just as her friend was, "Shepard... Is that... you're alive?"
Everything in her called out to sunder her helm just to prove to the only one she considered a friend in this room that it was truly her, it was one last thought of reason that had prevented her from doing something this erratic and instead, have Jane trying through words alone, "Remember when I gave you the geth data, Tali? Did it help you complete your Pilgrimage?"
Anxiety had her quaking under her armour again. That won't be enough, a desolate part of her argued until her friend uttered words that Shepard didn't know how much she needed to hear.
"Yes, it did," she answered softly, before sharply turning to her squad, "Prazza, weapons down. This is definitely Commander Shepard."
The next few words might as well have shattered the positive feeling that gave her immeasurable hope, "Then why is your old commander working for Cerberus?"
Shepard wanted to scream, to shout, to lash out, that she had no choice, but once again, the vicious beast of anguish was trying to break free. And without Tali's trust, it had the best chances at escaping its confines. But alas— or fortunately? —Jane had underestimated her friend's loyalty, which was currently the only thing keeping her sanity afloat.
"I don't know. Maybe we should ask."
Seeing a shimmer of silver lining on the horizon, Jane forced the shakiness from her voice, "I nearly died, Tali. Cerberus spent over two years rebuilding me. They want me to investigate attacks on human colonies."
"Likely story. No organization would commit so many resources to bring back one soldier," countered Prazza resolutely. And before her death, she would have believed him.
"You haven't seen Shepard in action, Prazza. Trust me. It was money well spent." Tali rebuffed him, signalling that she wanted to hear no more of it from her younger team member. Neither did Shepard seek to continue this topic any further, she felt distraught as it was without someone to question her allegiances.
"Perhaps we can work together. We're here looking for a young quarian named Veetor. He was here on Pilgrimage."
They were back on talking business, and it felt easier for Shepard to cast aside the weakness of her mentality and be Commander Shepard once again, "Is he the one controlling all those mechs?"
"We suspect it. When he saw us landing, he hid in a warehouse on the far side of town."
The strong edge of her voice returned to Jane at once, "Veetor's the only one who can tell us what happened here. We should work together to find him."
Although the young Prazza looked eager to throw himself into another argument with Jane's squad, Tali gave him no quarter to actually do it. Shepard was running out of arguments that could not make it look like she was backing up Cerberus.
"Agreed," acknowledged Tali, "We work together to get to Veetor."
"Make sure to keep in radio contact."
"Will do. Good luck, Shepard. Whatever happens... it's good to have you back."
And for a second Jane believed her. If only she herself would be so convinced.
Shepard POV
Emotions were a fickle thing to deal with. No matter the species.
As marines, they were taught to not let them act on their own accord. Most of a marine's tasks depended on the clarity of thought and the ability to execute clinically. For the eighteen years old Jane who had freshly enlisted the Alliance marines, the regulations meant as much as the Bible for Christians. She had been done everything in her power to make Anderson proud, and not give anyone fodder to sully his decision of having to pick her up from the slums.
She had never talked back to her superior officers, had never disobeyed an order, had never allowed herself the smallest slip-ups.
Not the healthiest behaviour she had ever possessed, but she had seen no other way to survive boot camp.
Her inflexible nature didn't matter for most of her fellow marines, but some of them had the tendency to tease her about it. Had tried to persuade her to cut some loose, and it had been extremely difficult at times, but the desire to really not screw up had eventually won over.
The more resentful batch, which thankfully made up the smaller percentage, even gave her the generous title of being an 'Officer's bitch'. As a member of the Tenth Street Reds, she wouldn't have hesitated to put them back in their place, however, as Anderson's protégé, such options were no longer available to her.
The Skyllian Blitz was not only the turning point of her military career, but an eye-opener as well. How her colleagues, friends she had the pleasure of knowing and the colonist of Elysium, had died that day under the charge she had led.
It was on this day that she had realized what being a marine, a soldier, fully encapsulated.
It was on this day that she had realized the true meaning of being a leader and the burdens that came along with it.
After that, she had never looked at life the same way ever again. One might think it was because she had finally thought to have done enough to make Anderson proud, but now that she had grown up, she realized that there was no need for her to chase her guardian's approval for the only approval she should have been seeking was her own.
And by the time she was 25 years of age, well risen in the Alliance Navy, her hell-bent self-imposed nature to follow rules subsided exponentially, and gave her the space to become the person that she was today.
Hero of the Blitz.
First Human Spectre.
Hero of the Citadel.
Who was she now? Who WAS SHE now?! WHO was she NO-
"Concentrate, Shepard!" Miranda reprimanded her sharply, and Shepard would have snarled at her hadn't her cover been rattled from the explosion of the rocket a YMIR Mech had fired at them. Though she doubted she would have heard it over the rattling of the mass accelerator cannons raining incessant gunfire at them.
But ultimately, she was right, they were on a mission. Tali counted on her to breach a path through the centre of the colony while they distracted some of the resistance's attention. Neither of them accounted for the indomitable anti-infantry mech that entered the scene, the robotic chatter bringing back distasteful memories of her first encounter with the Geth on Eden Prime all those years ago.
Her body was aching in places it was yet too young to ache.
Just what had they done to her?
She had arrived too late to save Prazza's squad from getting slaughtered in the wake of the heavy armour plating the YMIR Mech was equipped with. And perhaps it was the contributing factor of her cumulating tiredness, or TIM did manage to alter her personality in any way, but she somehow couldn't find it within herself to mourn his loss too much.
But before she could succumb to her desire to just lay down and sleep, something told her that this was the last bit of resistance they would be met with. And if it's only this big-ass tin can between her and Veetor, then she would damn well move her sore bones to wrap this up if she didn't fancy dropping dead any second.
The way she almost sounded like Wrex made her grin exasperatedly at herself under the helmet. How could she not? When she remembered so many fond memories of her old crewmates back at the SSV Normandy SR-1.
"Watch out, Shepard!" One of the two shouted, but the warning came too late as Shepard got nearly squashed under the massive metallic appendage of their foe. Shit, that was way too close to her liking, though Jane was at least able to follow up with a cryo blast.
Miranda and Jacob have used the small window to finish it off while Shepard plastered a badge of medi-gel she had found in one of the many abandoned apartments. Pointedly ignoring the glares she was receiving from Miranda, she made her way up to the building where she dearly hoped to meet Veetor.
No sooner than the automatic doors swished open did her ears pick up the quarian's loud gibbering behind a series of flickering screens, "Monsters coming back. Mechs will protect. Safe from swarms. Have to hide. No monsters. No swarms. No-no-no-no-no..."
Tali had mentioned that he behaved nervous in crowds, what was tangible in his voice wasn't exactly that but something else when there was no one else in this room to make him jittery. Though witnessing someone else having a hard time admittedly calmed Jane's own rising anxiety and it gave her back enough self-control to pace herself when approaching his stifling space.
"Veetor?"
She thought it a small victory when she managed not to scare him with her voice right off the spot, "No Veetor. Not here. Swarms can't find. Monsters coming. Have to hide."
Perhaps she might get to him if she continued with small steps, "No one's going to hurt you anymore."
But he gave no signs of spatial awareness, Veetor's state of mind seemed to have retreated into a world of its own, of mirage safety and empty 'everything is going to be fines'. A small part of her heart still reached out to him. This guy had obviously been through something that had inspired great terror within him, but she couldn't help him if he wouldn't share what it was.
Should I wait for Tali, Jane asked herself as she silently observed the quarian, slightly falling into a trance of his rhythmic pressing of artificial buttons while he was tinkering away. Tinkering away...
An idea sprung to her mind. Reaching for her own omni-tool, Shepard took some steps to configure a function and then, swiped from the screen most to the right to the left, successfully plugging them off in the process.
Hopefully, that would snap him out of it.
The quarian starred confusedly for a second, his main focus having been driven away, then pushed himself off the counter to stand up. Fully acknowledging her presence with much-voiced shock and incredulity. Sorry for the rude awakening.
"You're human. Where did you hide? How come they didn't find you?"
Shepard opened her mouth but Miranda beat her to it, "Who didn't find us?"
"The... the monsters. The swarms. They took everyone."
Yeah, she would need more than that. "Why didn't the colonists fight back, Veetor? What happened?"
There was a tremble in his voice as it turned sombre, "You don't know. You didn't see. But I see everything."
For a fleeting second, Shepard thought she would lose him again as he turned to the malfunctioned monitors, but with a mere press of a button, he showed them the compiled security footage of the last few hours he had spent piecing together manually, and what it uncovered was more stranger than meeting the Thorian.
"What the hell is that?" She heard Jacob exclaim, knowing he was also looking at the human-sized bipedal creatures.
Veetor paused the footage at certain points for her to get a better look at the abductors. Upon closer inspection, the closest similarity she could find to compare them to were insects. You know these bugs with a chitinous exoskeleton, two anterior pairs of what appear to be vestigial limbs, four eyes, and a distinct, large, tapering head.
The colonist, on the other hand, were being systematically transported like cattle. Either in some weird levitating coffin or brutishly dragged and tossed without a care, the sight was unimaginably disheartening.
"My God, I think that is a Collector."
"A what?" slipped off Shepard's mouth without pretence, "Is that some kind of alien?"
Jacob took it upon himself to supply her with an answer, "They're a species from somewhere beyond the Omega 4 relay. Only a few people have ever seen one in person."
"They usually work for through intermediaries, like slavers or hired mercenaries. If they're involved with the Reapers somehow, it could explain what happened to the colonies."
Did they always supplement their sentences in turns? What were they, twins?
"The Collectors have advanced technology. They could have a weapon that disables an entire settlement at once."
Call it an educated guess, but she would bet all her money on those swarms being one of them. Veetor, as if reading her mind, brought some truth to her hunch, "The seeker swarms. No one can hide. The seekers find you. Freeze you. Then the monsters take you away."
The anger from the abduction threw her exhaustion, which had been getting to her, effectively under the table. A moment of silence prevailed for a millisecond before Shepard felt the need to take action, being spurred on by the loss. She turned to the two Cerberus operatives behind her and demanded, "Since you two have some insight, what more can you tell me about the Collectors?"
Each of them gave her a look, cautious of the strength in her tone that gave them the notion that Shepard finally asserted her authority over the party, and unsurprisingly, Jacob began to spill everything he knew of them, "Nobody knows much. They're so rare, a lot of people don't believe they exist."
At the end of his report, Jane automatically turned to the ebony-haired woman to his left, expecting additional input to Jane's question, but she suspected Miranda had nothing to add this time, "More importantly, why are they abducting human colonists? What are they after?"
"Maybe the Illusive Man can figure it out," Jacob reasoned.
With a slight drop of her head, Jane sometimes needed to remind herself that he was here for the cause and not the ideals. Taking a second to mull over her thoughts, her eyes briefly wandered over to the young quarian standing in attendance, though it was apparent that their presence unnerved him the longer they stayed. It would be better to abstain from asking Veetor more than he could handle at the moment.
Where the hell was Tali?
The presence of another quarian should give Veetor at least a bit of comfort. Contrary to being surrounded by three armed humans with questionable motives, combine that with his skittish nature and we have a ticking bomb ready to go off at the slightest misstep.
Miranda and Jacob seemed to be under the impression Shepard was listening to their discussions about the type of insect drones the Collectors used against the colony in the recording or the reason why Veetor survived the raid in the first place, but the woman in charge was currently too lost in her thoughts to care about what her 'allies' speculated about. Their mussing were merely educated guesses at best, and an issue to be resolved later.
But she couldn't help but think there was something off about TIM's tip to begin with. The man was too confident in his recommendation. He had sent her to investigate as if he had known all along what she would find here, as if he only needed Jane's unbelieving eyes in order to convince her to join his circle.
If you don't find the evidence we're both looking for, we can part ways. She tsked in frustration. The Illusive Man wouldn't have made an offer like that without getting the best of it - her cooperation. Jane shouldn't, by all accounts, be surprised by his cunning and subtle manipulation.
Now more than ever did she feel as if she was caught between the devil and the deep blue sea. And most likely she was.
And Shepard had no fucking clue what to do about it other than play nice and pray for an opportunity to pay it back ten-fold would hopefully arise in the foreseeable future.
Jane unconsciously gritted her teeth, should a possibility such as this ever present itself, she would think back on this very moment and savour it like aged wine.
Without regard to the continued opinions on the topic at hand, and filled with returning impatience and headache, the Commander cut in harshly, "What happened next?"
Jane felt no small amount of guilt for the jump it caused in the young quarian, who thought her change of tone was directed at him, "The monster took the people onto the ship, and then they left. The ship flew away. But they'll be back for me. No one escapes!"
"I think that's probably all we're going to get out of him, Commander."
Honest to God, Shepard wasn't above answering with a snarky 'Your grasp of the obvious is truly inspiring, Jacob.' but decided against it at the last second. Jane opted to have at least one of the two on speakable terms with her.
Taking a quick breath, Shepard aimed for a softer tone when addressing the by-now immensely stressed Veetor, "We appreciate what you told us. You were very helpful."
The quarian's stiff posture relaxed, "I studied them. The swarms. I recorded them with my omni-tool. Lots of readings. Electro-magnetic. Dark energy."
Not even a second had passed when Miranda sprung into action with words spun with haste, "We need to get this data to the Illusive Man. Grab the quarian and call the shuttle to come pick us up."
There was a pause in her as she nonchalantly turned to the raven-haired Cerberus operative in the pinstripe white armour. Miranda may not have been able to see her tight-lipped expression but Jane figured she would be smart enough to sense the poignant disinterest leaking out of her stare. Sorry, who was supposed to be the Commander here again?!
The redhead opened her mouth just in time for Tali to arrive at the scene, somehow overhearing the female Cerberus operative through the walls, "What? Veetor is injured! He needs treatment, not an interrogation!"
The tone with which she had spoken barely held any resemblance of the same young quarian she had let join in Ambassador Udina's office, but it didn't stop Jacob from backing up his coworker, "We won't hurt him. We just need to see if he knows anything else. He'll be returned unharmed."
"Your people tried to betray us once already. If we give him to you, we'll never get the intel we need."
Why were the two of them so hell-bent on advocating their interest rather than listening to their Commander? And the Illusive Man expected her to put her trust in those two? When it seemed as if Miranda wouldn't try and throw her under the bus at the earliest notice? Ah, actually, she was running too far ahead for that one. Miranda would save that for Shepard's expiration date, no doubt.
"Prazza was an idiot, and he and his men paid for it. You're welcome to take Veetor's omni-tool data, but please. Just let me take him."
Fair enough. She wasn't about to follow through with any of her party's suggestions anyhow because Jane didn't see any reason to drag Veetor further into the mess, though the need to ask Tali if she would like to join did circulate her mind once too many times. But as much Jane wanted- needed -the company of a friend who she knew she could confide in, she wasn't about to ruin Tali's life with her selfishness by dragging her into Cerberus.
Not longer being able to look into the veiled purple orbs hidden behind the compulsory helmet without succumbing to her desires, she turned to Miranda to announce her verdict, "He's traumatized, and he needs medical care. Tali will give us the omni-tool data and take him to the flotilla."
Out of all the things she expected Miranda to say, a somewhat complacent 'Understood, Commander.' wasn't one of them. Well, but Shepard wasn't going to look the gift horse in the mouth and take it how it presented itself. She was beyond the point of drama anyways.
"Thank you, Shepard. I'm glad you're still the one giving orders-"
"Could have fooled me a second ago," Jane thought intrinsically.
"-Good luck out there. If I find anything that can help you, I'll let you know."
And with that parting sentence, any sense of relief she might have felt from Tali's promise followed the quarian as she left her squad to their own devices, waiting in quietness for their pick-up with Shepard continued to brood over the recordings in fading concentration.
Shepard POV
It wasn't long until her next meeting with TIM. He, after all, was waiting for her to meet up with him. His tone had a faintly lighter edge to it, like a cat pleased from being given what it wanted, when she got scanned into his space.
"Shepard. Good work on Freedom's Progress."
Ah, back to her surname it was.
"The quarians forwarded their findings from Veetor's debriefing. No new data, but it's a surprising olive branch, given our history. You and I have different methods, but I can't argue with your results."
Jane had heard a brief mentioning of what they did to the Migrant Fleet some years back, and considering the Quarians held more than a grudge against them 'till this day spoke volumes about the gravity of their transgression, "You ever think about playing nice once in a while?"
He gave something between a nod and a shrug, half-heartedly acknowledging her remark, "Diplomacy is great when it works, but difficult when everyone already perceives you as a threat. But more importantly, you confirmed the Collectors are behind the abductions."
Jane huffed and squared her stiff shoulders, "Why do I get the feeling you knew about them already?"
He nodded affirmatively, "I had my suspicions, but I needed proof. The Collectors are enigmatic at-"
"Says the man calling himself the Illusive Man," Shepard gibed pointedly.
He chuckled, a sound almost lost to her stump ears, "Point taken. But I am not the one who periodically travels to the Terminus Systems looking to gather seemingly unimportant items or specimens. Usually in exchange for their technology," TIM took a quick drag, "When their transactions are complete, they disappear as quickly as they arrived; back beyond the unmapped Omega 4 relay. Until now, we've had no evidence of direct aggression by the Collectors."
Jane had a hard time following the man's words as the world around her swirled, and at one point she had found herself catching her drooping eyelids before getting knocked out. With the anger and adrenaline receding, she once again faced the jaws of sleep.
"Why is the Omega 4 relay unmapped? What do we know about it?" Jane asked, the first traces of sleep appearing in her speech. Jane prayed the speakers of her helmet would make it less obvious.
"Only that no ship passing through it has ever returned. Our best guess is that the relay react differently to collector vessels, allowing them safe passage. If they can manipulate relays, that's just further evidence of the connection with the Reapers."
It won't take long, Jane, just keep pretending as if you wouldn't drop dead on your feet any second, Shepard repeated to herself.
"Any ideas on why they've shifted their focus to humans?"
"If they're agents for the Reapers, it could be any number of reasons. Obviously, Humanity played a huge role in Sovereign's destruction. That might have been enough to draw their attention. What really concerns me is why they bother abducting the colonists. Once the humans are paralyzed, why not just kill them?"
He sounded genuine in his dumbfoundedness, but that didn't explain why he had known about Freedom's Progress before he even sent Jane, "You're holding something back. How do you know the Reapers are involved?"
A calculative gaze had set into his hooded eyes, the orangish lightning making it near impossible to determine their colour, "The patterns are there, buried in the data. The Council and the Alliance want to believe the Reaper threat died with Sovereign. You and I know better. I won't wait until the Reapers are on the march. We need to take the fight to them."
Evasive? Very much. But he had a point. The Terminus Systems were a big red flag for the Council. They kept avoiding that place like the plague, they even grounded the old Normandy so Shepard wouldn't follow after Saren back in the days. And despite having a direct representative at the Citadel Council, the Alliance wouldn't do anything that might displease the other Council Races, as they were still a fairly young member. They wouldn't risk testing the Council's boundaries for a mystical threat that only a few people knew about.
With her faithful crew being either dead or scattered to the four winds, she had every right to believe she was alone in this task.
"If this is a war, I'll need an army. Or a really good team." Their conversation had taken a spin into business since TIM seemed to abandon his previous sophistry, and it thankfully seemed to be enough to keep the exhaustion at bay a little while longer.
"I've already compiled a list of soldiers, scientists, and mercenaries," as if that interface of his was connected to his mind, it popped up right beside him, "You'll get dossiers on the best of them. Finding them and convincing them to work with you could be challenging, but you're a natural leader. I'll continue "
Damn, he really was fully convinced that she would jump the wagon from the very beginning. Wasn't Miranda lying when she had assured Jane that they had made no changes in her personality? Because this was feeling too much, but that little dark voice continued to whisper in her ear to simply play along, let him think that he has you convinced.
"I'm still a Spectre. Maybe I can get the Council to help us out."
He didn't outright seem to have taken the bait, but he did shift in his seat, "If you think you can convince them, by all means. Just remember - you've been gone a long time. Things have changed."
Jane hadn't gained anything explicit from him with her strategy, but at least it was a decent try. Back to business then, "Keep your list. I want people I trust - the ones who helped me stop Saren and the Geth."
"That was two years ago, Commander. Most of them have moved on... or their allegiances have changed."
Shepard wanted to jump to the magnificent opportunity to inquire about her crew, about the people she had come to see as family. But was she prepared to hear about the fates of her friends? About their possible demise? In her messy state? What would guarantee that she wouldn't break down once she uttered the first name?
Can't the universe give her a fucking break?
But good judgement didn't seem to come by in her restless mind, no matter how much her body pushed for rest. And so she gambled the remaining bits of her fragile sanity away. And by heart, she recited each name and each split of a second in-between her and TIM's answer would feel like a small eternity of fearful anticipation, followed by immeasurable relief only to begin the cycle all over again.
They survived! Thank the universe for small miracles!
Her curiosity nearly got out of hand when she almost snitched out Akane, the only one of whose existence everyone at the SSV Normandy SR-1 knew to keep a secret for... obvious reasons. And for other... less-than-obvious reasons. But she caught at her tongue fiercely before she could do so, resulting in a ferocious coughing fit, which gave her a sweet reminder of her shaking muscles.
"I see that I may have overexerted your body by sending you out in the field still fresh out of coma, but I can't say it wasn't worth it." She heard him say over her stunted ears, but she paid his comment no mind for she was more occupied to get a grip on her posture.
"Okay, I get it," she croaked out, sounding quite defeated even though it was just the strain of forcing out the syllables, "They're not available."
Jane inhaled from the depths of her depraved lungs, and radiated the confidence of the kind she displayed when she was chosen as humanity's first Specter, "You worry about the Collectors, I'll make sure my team is ready."
The man took a long, satisfying drag of his burning cigarette, "Good. Two things before you go: First, head to Omega and find Mordin Solus. He's a brilliant salarian scientist. Our intelligence suggests he may know how to counteract the Collector's paralyzing seeker swarms."
That alone deserved a big 'Fuck you'.
"I haven't even started, and you're telling me what to do." There was hardness and venom involved in her tone, and she made no effort to hide it whatsoever.
Although she was naive to think it was enough to get a rise out of him, he was far too collected for that, it at least established that she may have silently agreed to a partnership but she would not be ordered around this easily.
"I'm giving you direction; what you do with it is up to you. I'm sure you'll make the right decision."
Flames dying out, she relented, "All right. What's the other thing?"
A small, discernable smile came to his lips as he came to answer, "I've found a pilot I think you might like. I hear he's one of the best. Someone you can trust."
With that being his final note for today, without giving Shepard the time to say anything back, not as if she had anything prepared in the first place, he cut off the call. And with that, every fight left her body as it slumped forward, trembling on her two feet.
Her very existence seemed to weigh her down, ready to jump at the possibility to stumble into a deep slumber so much she hadn't heard a person slowly making their way towards her form.
"Hey, Commander."
The redhead slowly turned around, finding the second most pleasing sight since she had met Tali.
"Just like old times, huh?" asked Joker with a fathom smile, and to be able to hear his stupid voice again couldn't have made her happier.
Author's note:
My patient readers, first of all, how has life treated you since the last chapter? I know it has been quite a while. College and my personal life have kept me busy enough. And neuroanatomy is kicking my ass but despair not! Despite my even busier schedule, I am trying to keep this story going. I have every intention of finishing this, and I will do so, alas at your expense because I cannot compromise too much to give you a better reading experience. Nevertheless, I owe you a debt of gratitude for still having enough interest to invest your time in reading this little imaginative piece of mine.
Let's dive into the storyline of Mass Effect 2, shall we?