Hey! Guess what?! I'm not dead!

REVIEW REPLIES!

Awesomo3000: I like your thinking. I'd definitely be screaming at Robert Downey Jr and Tom Holland because they're the reason I end up an emotional mess. Like, I love them, but YOU BASTARDS!

willowbean: I definitely like your suggestions, but I sort of have something already in place for Bulkhead. You pretty much surmised how Chester and LP make me feel perfectly. Also, like the new username!

wolverine12: That does happen in my now discontinued original Talida Prime series. Unfortunately, I cannot incorporate that into this story because this takes place two years before the first season of Transformers: Prime and Knock Out doesn't come into the show (along with Breakdown) until episode 10, if I remember rightly? (It's been a while.)

Ashley: Here you go!

EmpressLoveSiren23: I'm glad you love my stories.

Obviously, I own nothing except for my original characters and original stories.

ENJOY!

…or not…

Song: Suicide is Painless (the M*A*S*H theme song; thanks for watching the show every time an episode you like comes on, dad)

The timeline stood at this. It's been eight days since Talida disappeared. Over a full week since she was kidnapped by the Decepticons on patrol.

It has also been three days since Jack found out the truth behind his best friend's disappearance.

And met her rather extraordinary family.

In those three days, Jack found himself spending more and more time at the Autobot base. They claimed it was for his protection now that the Decepticons know about him and, more importantly, his connection to Talida. They tried to get him to stay there 24/7, but Jack successfully argued against it, stating that he still had to go to school, his mother would worry, and to avoid suspicion, they had to go on like everything was normal.

So, they came to a compromise. He would spend the afternoon with them at the base and be dropped off at his house before his mother returned from work so she would be none the wiser. Agent Fowler continued the protection detail for whenever Jack ventured outside the base. This time, however, an Autobot would join the detail. Arcee, Bulkhead, and Bumblebee would rotate amongst themselves and join the protection detail at random times. Cliffjumper was unable to join due to his recovery. Ratchet was too busy scanning for signs of the Decepticons, hoping a Decepticon sighting would lead them to Talida. And Optimus… Unfortunately, Optimus had chosen a vehicle mode that was not designed to join a covert security detail.

Not for the first time, Jack couldn't help but wonder about the process that went into choosing which vehicle mode the Autobots would use. He could somewhat understand Ratchet's vehicle mode as an ambulance since he was the Autobot medic. Arcee being a motorcycle also made sense because she was the smallest Autobot. Bulkhead's vehicle mode also suited his bulky form. He could even somewhat understand Optimus' choice to transform into a truck due to his size. Bumblebee and Cliffjumper, on the other hand, he attributed more to personality rather than practicality. But he couldn't even make that conclusion. He didn't know them well enough.

There was also the communication barrier between himself and Bumblebee that presented its own obstacle.

So, that was how Jack ended up with Bulkhead, who was driving him home after he spent the afternoon at the base. In the three days he had been with the Autobots, outside their initial first encounter and his talk with Arcee, he hardly interacted with them. He didn't talk to them beyond pleasantries or if they talked to him first, and even then, the conversations were always brief and to the point. He spent most of his time in Talida's room, desperate to cling to his best friend where he could. In a lot of ways, he was desperate to get to know her once again, as the past several days have made him wonder if he knew her at all.

"You want me to adjust the temperature?" Bulkhead asked, interrupting Jack's thoughts and musings.

"No thank you," Jack shook his head.

In all honesty, he felt neither hot nor cold. He didn't feel much of anything these days that wasn't worry or fear.

"Do you really think there's any hope?" Jack asked.

"I have to," Bulkhead said firmly, "If the roles were reversed, Tally wouldn't give up on me."

Jack hummed in consideration. He knew that Bulkhead was right. If the roles were reversed – if either one of them were being held captive on the Decepticon warship instead of her – Talida wouldn't give up until they were found. In fact, she'd be spearheading their rescue operation.

At least that was one aspect of his best friend that would remain the same.

"She mentioned you were a Wrecker," Jack began, referencing the hologram she had left for him.

"Yeah. We were the tough ones. Accepted the missions no one else would. Eventually, I left the Wreckers to join Team Prime. So far, I have no regrets," Bulkhead shrugged (well, as much as he could while in vehicle mode).

"What about before the war?" Jack inquired, "What did you do before you became a Wrecker?"

"I was a labourer. I can build stuff. I can break stuff. That's it," Bulkhead answered bluntly, "Joining the Wreckers gave me an outlet, but Optimus gave me the chance to be part of a more noble cause."

"She said you were one of the lucky ones," Jack remarked.

"Yeah. With war, you do get used to the potential of seeing your friends die in front of you. But with the Wreckers, everyone knew that there would be Wreckers who wouldn't come back. It was a guarantee rather than a possibility," Bulkhead revealed before sighing heavily, "Seeing them die on the battlefield was hard enough, but losing them to the disease…"

"What disease?" Jack demanded, suddenly intrigued in what Bulkhead had to say rather than simply making conversation to be polite.

"There's a disease. It corrupts you from the inside out. Destroying anything that was good. It's like you are drawn into a darkness and you lost control of yourself. Sufferers tend to be violent. Bloodthirsty. At first, you can control it to an extent. But eventually, it's hard to bring them back. Sometimes, they remember what happens. Sometimes, they don't," Bulkhead began explaining.

"They blackout," Jack clarified, "There's two kinds: partial and complete. With partial blackouts, a person can remember forgotten events with certain cues. With complete blackouts, that memory loss is permanent."

"Tally often wonders what's worse. Knowing or not knowing," Bulkhead remarked, "I think she would know better than anyone, considering she has it herself."

Jack looked at the dashboard with a look on his face that can only be described as a combination of horror and shock.

"She's sick?!" Jack cried out, "Why didn't she say anything?!"

"She couldn't without giving away who she was. Her disease is purely Cybertronian. Also, she mentions how people on Earth are treated differently when they find out they have a disease with no cure. She never wanted to go through that," Bulkhead revealed.

"So, she's going to die," Jack barely got out.

"If only it were that easy, Jack. The disease doesn't kill you. But it's a fate worse than death. In the final stages, these… 'blackouts' last longer. Until, eventually, you can't come out of them and nothing can bring you back. Megatron's a prime example. The disease is part of the reason why he is who he is today," Bulkhead growled slightly.

"So, she becomes another Megatron," Jack surmised.

"Or worse. People react differently to the final stages," Bulkhead stated, "Talida was seven when she was diagnosed."

"Seven?" Jack repeated in horror.

"We were training together when she started showing signs. She lost control. Injured me pretty badly," Bulkhead began recalling, "I found out waking up in sick bay…"

Begin flashback

"Ouch," Bulkhead cringed at the bright light Ratchet was shining in his optics, "Ratchet, is this really necessary? There's nothing up there to hurt."

"You were hit pretty bad, Bulkhead. It's Optimus's orders that you undergo a thorough examination," Ratchet countered before bringing in a trump card, "Talida would also feel better if she knew she didn't cause permanent damage to you."

"Ratch, if anyone should be a priority, it's Tally," Bulkhead tried to reason with the medic, "What happened in there is not like her."

"I already checked her over," Ratchet admitted hesitantly, "You were out of it for a while."

"What's wrong with her? Is she sick?" Bulkhead demanded.

Ratchet let out a heavy sigh before finally revealing, "She has the disease, Bulkhead."

Bulkhead was too horrified by Ratchet's revelation to continue his objections to the thorough examination. Bulkhead knew of the disease. He saw it destroy his many comrades.

He thought of one comrade in particular who, when he realised he was going through the disease's horrendous final stages, threw himself into a pit of Scraplets. Being eaten alive by Scraplets was a painful way to go, but even that horrible death was not as bad as the fate that awaited anyone with the disease.

Nobody blamed the Wrecker for taking his own life when they found out why. Many even admitted that, if they were in that situation, they might have done the same thing. Maybe not throw themselves in a pit of Scraplets, but definitely do something to save themselves – and their loved ones – from a fate many considered to be worse than death.

There was something else Bulkhead knew about the disease. It was genetic. There were instances where it would pop up randomly in Cybertronians with no family history. But the majority of cases came from someone who had a family member with the disease. Once one person had the disease, it was there in the genetic makeup of all their relations.

Sometimes, the disease was passed down from parent to child. Sometimes, it would skip multiple generations. Sometimes, it was passed down from a distant relative.

Such as an uncle.

It was common knowledge to many Autobots and Megatron were close friends before the war started. But only a select few knew they were actually brothers. Separated at birth by the system they originally fought against.

So, if Megatron had the disease, which is something he got as a result of their father having it, it meant that there was every chance any children Optimus had could inherit it.

Even though he knew first-hand how upset Optimus and Arcee were when they thought they couldn't have children of their own, one thing they did think about was how they didn't have to worry about potentially passing down the disease.

Bulkhead already hated Megatron before on principle. But now, he had another reason to hate him. Talida was the brightest spark he knew. To know that Megatron was the reason she was going to be destroyed from the inside out…

He wished he could track the Decepticon warlord down and give him an up close and personal introduce him to his mace weapons.

"How bad?" Bulkhead asked.

"Early stages. However, it was always challenging to map the disease's progression. All sufferers go through the same stages, but at different timetables. I can only confirm when Talida progresses to the next stage. I can't provide a timeline of when she will, though," Ratchet answered.

"So, she could have years?" Bulkhead pressed hopefully.

"Or months. Or weeks," Ratchet quickly dampened his mood, "I highly doubt she'll reach the final states in the next few days. So, she still has a bit of time. How much, I can't say."

"I want to see her," Bulkhead demanded.

"I am almost done," Ratchet reassured him, "Optimus and Bumblebee are with her. She's… She's quite upset. And terrified."

Bulkhead didn't blame her. Who would in that situation? Talida was an incredibly bright child. She would have a very good understanding of what this all means.

True to Ratchet's word, he finished his thorough examination of Bulkhead quickly and let him go see Talida. Bulkhead almost knocked Ratchet over in his rush to get to her.

The usually grouchy medic let that slide, partly because he was as worried as everyone else was about the fate of the young techno-organic. While the disease was, sadly, something that was fairly common for Cybertronians, they knew next to nothing about the disease appearing in techno-organics.

When you add that to the already known unknowns of the disease in regular circumstances, they truly were in uncharted territory.

Add on the fact that her mother's not here to provide her the comfort she needs. Bulkhead remembered how Optimus and Talida were almost destroyed (although the Prime did not show it) when Arcee was forced to leave them. Sure. She kept in touch when she could, but he remembered how hard it was to stay in touch with his family back on Cybertron. There was no guarantee when they would receive word from Arcee.

Or even if she would come back.

That thought was squashed as quickly as it appeared. None of the Autobots ever wanted to feed Talida false hope about her mother's return, but at the same time, they didn't dare to destroy them. Even Ratchet watched his pessimistic attitude.

Bulkhead was granted entry into Talida's room by Bumblebee, while Optimus remained by his daughter's side, trying and failing to comfort her.

"How is she?" Bulkhead asked the scout worriedly.

"Terrified," Bumblebee bleeped to him, "Worried about you."

"What did Ratchet say?" Optimus inquired after his soldier's health.

"He said I'm okay," Bulkhead answered before turning his attention to Talida, "Hey, sprout."

Talida immediately gasped and shied away from him, scared of hurting him again.

"Maybe we should leave them alone," Bumblebee suggested to Optimus.

Optimus hated leaving his daughter in such a state, but he and Bumblebee spent ages trying to get through to Talida to no avail. Maybe Bulkhead would be luckier, since the two shared such a unique bond.

Before long, Bulkhead and Talida were left alone. Bulkhead went to approach her, but Talida shied even further away from him. So, Bulkhead came to a compromise. He was close enough that he could reach across and scoop her up if needed, but still far enough to respect Talida's wishes.

If he wanted her to open up to him, pushing her too far wasn't the way to go about it.

"Sprout, I know you're upset about what happened," Bulkhead began tentatively, "But you need to know it's not your fault."

"How is it not my fault?" Talida asked him tearfully, "Last time I checked, I was the one who threw you through a wall. I was the one practically trying to kill you."

"But it wasn't really you, Tally. The sprout I know wouldn't dream of hurting any of us," Bulkhead implored passionately before asking her carefully, "How much were you told?"

"It's not reversible. It's just going to get worse with time until I can't come back," Talida answered.

"Okay," Bulkhead nodded, "What you need to understand is, yes, you lose control. But I want you to know that it will never be your fault. You never asked for this. And I know that you would never hurt us. Not me. Not your dad. Not Bumblebee. Not even Ratchet."

"What about Jackie?" Talida demanded, "What if I hurt him?"

That one was tricky to answer. Part of him wanted to say they should tell Jack and his family, but they couldn't do that without giving away their true identities. This went beyond any human diseases they were aware of that were remotely similar they might have been able to pass it off as.

For one thing, some had cures.

"You won't. Not right now," Bulkhead tried to say before ultimately relenting, "When I was a Wrecker, I used to get angry. I used to get in this fog. Nothing could bring me out of it. When I joined your dad, it was something I still struggled with. I know what you're going through, we don't know a lot about and it can't really compare. But what helped me was remembering to breathe and focus."

"Focus?" Talida repeated.

"Find something to focus on. You could focus on your breathing. You could count. You could focus on something positive," Bulkhead suggested, "Almost like a… what did Fowler say about a light and a tunnel?"

"There's a light at the end of the tunnel," Talida answered.

"What you need to do is find that light," Bulkhead told her, "Find that light at the end of the tunnel, and you'll make it through the fog."

Bulkhead was relieved when Talida approached him.

"There's a lot we still don't know, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it," Bulkhead promised her as he scooped her up, "For now, let's focus on what we do know."

"Like going for a drive?" Talida asked hopefully.

Bulkhead couldn't help but laugh. Oh yeah. She was starting to return to her normal self.

"Yeah. Come on. Let's go," Bulkhead pretended to sigh heavily.

End flashback

Jack didn't even know how to process everything Bulkhead told him.

Partly because of his own flashback.

Begin flashback

The bell had barely signaled the end of the lesson before Talida quickly gathered her things and ran off. This only served to make Jack more concerned. The two best friends, who barely spent their time apart if they could help it, always left the classroom together. The only time they wouldn't was if Talida had auto-shop for her next period, but Jack knew that they had their lunch period before they moved on to Spanish.

But he noticed that Talida had been upset. Angry. He even dared to say murderous.

He couldn't help but wonder what was wrong. Sure, his best friend had a temper that was as fiery as her red hair. And she was definitely dangerous when angry. However, he couldn't think of anything that would've set her off.

Well, Vince being his usual self probably didn't help.

But even then, Talida was able to ignore Vince's misogynistic comments. Or, at least count to ten to calm herself. Repeatedly.

And, yes. There were sometimes when Jack wondered if he should remove any sharp objects from his best friend's reach.

The only reason he never did was because he would just touch her shoulder and she'd calm down almost instantly… some of the time, anyway.

Well, that, and she could turn anything into a weapon, which impressed him and terrified him at the same time.

Knowing his best friend as well as he did, it didn't take long for Jack to find her. When she was upset, she always went to their place. On their first day of school, they found a gazebo at the back of the school that was disused. Nobody approached it, although there was no rule saying they couldn't. Some people feared it was structurally unsound, but Jack and Talida quickly determined that it was a solid structure.

All it needed was a fresh coat of paint. Maybe some nice flowers.

And fairy lights. For some reason, Talida felt a gazebo needed fairy lights.

Regardless of their thoughts on the gazebo, it quickly became their place.

"Hey," Jack began as he approached her, "Are you okay?"

"Huh?" Talida stammered before turning her back to Jack, "Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

"People who are okay don't rush out of class like you just did," Jack countered.

"Unless they have Mr. Munro," Talida retorted, still not facing him, "Seriously, Jack. I'm okay."

"Forgive me if I don't believe you," Jack scoffed.

Eventually, Talida turned around to face the food in front of her. She didn't even realise Jack had laid it out for her. Jack could have sworn that her eyes flashed red before they returned to their brilliant shade of blue.

"Were your eyes red?" Jack couldn't help but ask.

Not missing the way Talida stiffened at the question, she quickly blew it off, "Don't people's eyes get red when they're emotional?"

Deciding not to press on that particular subject matter, Jack diverted the conversation to a different, yet still related, topic, "Look, Lida. Vince is who he is. There's nothing we can do to change that."

"I could toss him in the trashcan. Or shoot him," Talida offered.

"I don't feel like seeing my best friend expelled or sent to juvenile hall, thank you very much," Jack told her firmly.

"Killjoy," Talida pouted before asking, "Can I do something to make him wet his pants?"

"No. You're better than that," Jack chided her before remarking, "Well, if you're making all these plans to torture Vince, you must be feeling better."

"It's a beautiful day. I'm under a gazebo that's in desperate need of fairy lights with my best friend. That's an instant cure," Talida proclaimed.

"Okay. Fairy lights? What is it with you and fairy lights?" Jack asked.

"Hey. Fairy lights can make anything better," Talida defended herself.

"I thought that's why I was here," Jack teased.

"Nah. You're here to make sure I don't follow through with my plans to shoot Vince," Talida smirked.

"I'll take what I can get," Jack shrugged.

Regardless, they laughed. When Talida took a look inside Jack's lunchbox when he opened it, she immediately reached inside her bag to get the second lunch she had made for this occasion.

"What kind of best friend would I be if I let you eat that organic tofu?" Talida asked.

"The worst kind," Jack answered in reference to their private joke.

End flashback

"That's why her eyes turn red," Jack muttered in realisation.

"Her eyes turning red is one of the first signs," Bulkhead informed Jack, "After that, it's incontrollable rage, no control over your actions… Sometimes, there's a specific target. Other times, she may attack the first person she sees. Which is why, whenever she senses a blackout coming, she tries to hide from everyone. So, the people she cares about most aren't in the line of fire."

"Do you think she could blackout while the Decepticons have her?" Jack asked worriedly.

"I think the Decepticons would be doing everything they can to induce a blackout, as you say," Bulkhead rumbled darkly, "When she's emerging from a blackout, she's extremely vulnerable. They may try to take advantage of that."

Before long, Bulkhead arrived at Jack's house. His mother wasn't home yet, and Jack knew she wouldn't be for another hour at least. Bulkhead released the seatbelt and opened his passenger door.

"Remember," Bulkhead reminded Jack as he got out of the car, "I'll be close by if anything happens with some of Fowler's agents."

"Just remember to make sure my mum doesn't notice you," Jack warned him, "She doesn't know anything about this and for her sake, I want to keep it that way."

Once Jack was on the sidewalk, Bulkhead moved until he was a little further down the street. As promised, he was still close by in case anything happened. However, he was also far enough away where his mother wouldn't get suspicious. Looking around, he saw some other cars parked on his street that he could recognise as belonging to Agent Fowler's agents, serving as his protection detail.

Before walking into his house, Jack did the same thing he started doing every night. He looked up at the sky. It was a beautiful clear night, the kind Talida loved.

Begin flashback

"How can you see all these?" Jack asked his best friend, laughter laced in his voice.

"Really? You can't see them?" Talida laughed.

The two best friends were lying on the roof of Jack's house, doing a favourite activity of theirs – watch the night sky and look for shooting stars or, in Talida's case, identify as many constellations as possible.

"No! I can't see Draco or Cassiopeia or Orion!" Jack responded.

"Well, for one thing, you wouldn't see Orion this time of year," Talida retorted, referencing what was, for some reason, her favourite constellation before pointing up to the sky, "Cassiopeia is up there next to Cepheus. In Greek mythology, Cassiopeia was the wife of King Cepheus. She was rather vein. Boasted she was more beautiful than the Nereids, the fifty sea nymphs fathered by the Titan Nereus. The Nereids were enraged by her comments and they appealed to Poseidon to punish her. Poseidon, who was married to one of the nymphs Amphrite, obliged and sent a sea monster named Cetus to ravage the coast of Cepheus's kingdom. Ironically, Cetus is another constellation."

"Is it that one that looks like a whale?" Jack inquired.

"Yeah. You can't see it now because it doesn't appear until winter. Like with Orion. Anyway, Cetus ravaged the coast of Cepheus' kingdom. When Cepheus turned to an oracle for help, the oracle told him that he and Cassiopeia had to sacrifice their daughter Andromeda to the sea monster to appease Poseidon. They chained her to a rock, leaving her for the monster to find," Talida continued her story.

"Please tell me this story has a happy ending," Jack pleaded.

"Andromeda was saved by the last minute by Perseus. You know, the Green hero? They later married. But at the wedding, one of Andromeda's former suitors, Phineus, showed up and claimed that he was the only one who had the right to marry Andromeda. During the fight, Perseus used the head of Medusa to defeat his opponents. You know, because one look at Medusa turned you to stone? However, Cassiopeia and Cepheus were also turned to stone because they didn't look away in time. Poseidon placed them in the sky. Cassiopeia was condemned to circle the celestial pole forever and spends half the year upside down as punishment for her vanity," Talida finished her story before laughing slightly, "She's usually depicted on her throne, still combing her hair. I mean, if that doesn't tell you anything about her vanity…"

"Say no more," Jack chuckled, "What's your fascination with Orion anyway?"

"Family joke," Talida shrugged, deciding she couldn't tell Jack that her father's original name was, in fact, Orion Pax, "Perseus and Andromeda are up there as well. You'd be surprised by how many of these constellations have origins rooted in Greek mythology."

"No wonder you aced that Ancient Greece unit," Jack grumbled.

"Hey. You did well yourself," Talida reminded him.

"Without you, I'd have been lost," Jack admitted.

"Figuratively or literally?" Talida couldn't help but ask, "If you look at the stars, you can never be lost."

"Because of North Star?" Jack correctly guessed.

"You never know what you may find up there," Talida said mysteriously.

"Come on, you two! It's bedtime!" they heard June call out to them.

"Coming!" they both responded as they both made their way down.

End flashback

Now, Jack looked up at the sky for a different reason. The only thing everyone knew about Talida's location was that she was being kept on the Decepticon warship. If they could find the warship, they would find Talida.

So, Jack looked up at the sky, hoping to see a glimpse of the warship. He always had mixed feelings when he couldn't. On the one hand, he was relieved, not wanting to have another encounter with the Decepticons anytime soon.

But on the other hand, if they could find the Decepticon warship, they would find his best friend and bring her home. That was all he wanted now. He wanted her home.

Letting out a sigh, he walked into his house, remembering what his mother had instilled into him about locking the door whenever he was home alone.

Maybe some homework would take his mind off things.

Yep. He actually thought that.

Talida lied on her back, looking up at the ceiling. She imagined it was the night sky, filled with every constellation she could think of. Even the constellations she couldn't see this time of year.

She had devised a new way to keep herself sane. In her mind's eye, she could see every constellation painted across the ceiling. Orion. Cassiopeia. Cepheus. Andromeda. Perceus. Draco.

Orion.

She always made sure she could see Orion in her mind, her last link to her family. To her dad.

Subconsciously, Talida fiddled with the fabric Starscream left for her. The blood-stained piece of Jack's shirt Starscream had given her. When she was still chained up, the piece of fabric was left there to torment her. Always in her line of sight, but out of reach. Eventually, Starscream and Malita stopped chaining her up. They knew Talida was starting to struggle to fight back, so they decided to not bother restraining her anymore, knowing she was too weak to escape.

In her mind, Talida painted another constellation. First, she drew the shape of his face in the stars – basing his design on the oblong face shape, since that was the closest shape she could think of. Then, she drew his hair on top of it, right down to that strand that fell over his eye she kept telling him to cut, much to his annoyance. Then, she used two bright stars to make his eyes, and used other smaller stars to fill in the rest.

She knew a lot of these legends came from Greek mythology, how they were placed into the sky by the Gods. Now, she wished she could do the same with those she loved the most.

Especially if she would be unable to see them again.

Hey. I said in A Long December that it would be the last time you would see Talida in a torture scene. Not that you wouldn't see Talida again at all until the rescue. Besides, I felt a bit bad about the length between updates, so I thought I'd throw in something nice.

I'll try not to be as long with the next chapter, but I can't promise anything.