"Rose, I'm glad you're awake. I'm going to get Aldyr to give you an update, ok?" Khermos said to you over the ship's internal comm system.

" 'Kay," you replied, eager for news. All you knew was that you'd been unconscious for several hours, during which you'd evidently gotten some serious surgery, judging by the size of the bandages around your midsection.

You sat up painfully, slowly, in your white sheeted bed in your room in the med bay, grimacing from your wounds. You looked at one hand contemplatively. Trying to confirm your existence, after the strangeness of being frozen in the stasis bubble and wondering in your slightly conscious state if you were dead and this was some kind of afterlife.

Well, you were still alive, anyway. You shivered, remembering the shock of that moment when you realized you let your guard down too soon.

Sans was amazing when he fought, but for you, all of it was overshadowed by the pain in his expression. You hated what had caused it and you wanted to make things better.

But you messed up. Again. Either you really were a bad person, or you'd failed yet again to communicate, to reach another person and show them how you felt. Like so many times before. You'd tried to show Sans you meant no harm, but you must have done something wrong.

The sharp spikes of bone driving through your insides had hurt. Really hurt. But not as much as the feeling of failure, the feeling that you could never really make a difference. You couldn't help anyone, because of how messed up you were.

A feeling like black tar clogged your throat, like all the voices from the past telling you how worthless you were.

Why did you even exist if you could never show anyone how you felt?

Failure. That was the biggest word echoing in your head. Maybe you'd even made things worse.

You did basically kidnap him here, after all - and he thought you'd killed everyone he knew. What must that have been like for him? Maybe he'd freaked out, started fighting the crew, and they'd hurt him. The thought of the sound of bone cracking, bruising - unbearable, and all because of you.

You were back inside that memory again.

Thrown against the wall covered in bruises, your slight form tried to hide itself somehow from your mother, who was holding a baseball bat. Nearby, your brother egged her on, while across the room, your father watched TV and acted like he didn't hear anything.

Your dog ran to you then, whipping around and growling and snarling at your mother on your behalf, as she tried to protect you with her large, furry body.

For a moment, you felt better. The dog was the only one in the family who made you feel safe. The only one you ever wanted to hug, or cry with. Whenever anyone else in the family tried to hug you, you winced and instinctively moved away. Even when you grew up, you were never able to hug other people without feeling uncomfortable.

But then the cruel voice said, "Your dog is a monster, just like you, and she needs to be put down!"

The hand with the bat raised and fell on the dog's head. You tried to throw out your arm to protect her. A wisp of something that Aldyr later told you was the beginnings of your shielding ability showed itself for just an instant, unnoticed by anyone else.

But it wasn't strong enough - you were too small and frail, and both your arm and the dog's skull cracked at the same time.

You shuddered, willing yourself away from the memory. You couldn't let that happen again. Not ever.

"Rose?" Aldyr's voice poked you over the comm. "you there?"

"Yeah," you replied hurriedly. "Aldyr, is Sans ok?"

"Huh? Sure, he's fine. Sleeping at the moment."

You closed your eyes in blissful relief.

"Good."