Disclaimer: All recognisable characters are the property of MGM/Amazon. No copyright infringement intended. I am simply taking my favourite two Gaters for a walk in an Alternate Universe.

Rating: I have upped the rating on this story to M due to the mature themes including depression, suicide and alcoholism.

Episode Tags: Takes place in Season 7 after 7.16 Death Knell.

TRIGGERS: Depression, Firearms, Suicide, Threats of Violence.

A/N: If you or anyone you know suffers from the Black Dog, encourage them to seek help. Ask them R U OK? Contains some bad language. I have no beta, so all mistakes are my own.

Response to Reviews: Thank you every one for your comments and for staying with me on this journey. I know the angst is a little full on, we will get there, I promise. This chapter occurs the evening of Sam's funeral and Jack is still very raw. He is not in the habit of letting go of his pain as we learned from the original movie, which means that I cannot in good conscience 'skip to the happy bit'.

Chapter 17: Escape

I woke up in Teal'c's SVC just as we pulled into the base carpark, my eyes still watery and head fuzzy with the beginnings of the all too familiar thump.

"Daniel, what are we doing here?"

"Helping a friend, Jack."

"I don't need help, I need Sam. But since she is gone, what I need is another bottle of scotch, her pillow, and some PEACE AND QUIET!" I was yelling by the time I reached the end of my tirade, an action which ramped up the pounding in my head.

When was everyone going to finally realise that without her, nothing mattered. Not me, not the war, not the SGC. Nothing. He turned to me, the look on his face was unreadable. Finally, it had only taken me seven years to teach the man how to keep himself guarded.

"What makes you think you are the friend I am helping right now?"

I opened my mouth to issue him a scathing retort about not needing his help but stopped when his words filtered into my fuzzy brain. I was about to ask who he was helping, but he was out of the car and walking toward the security point, with Janet right behind him. I jumped out and part walked, part staggered after them. Daniel's hands were shoved in his pockets.

"Jack… just act sober enough to get past security, will you? We don't have time for your self-recriminations right now."

"What? Self-recriminations? Sam is dead. I was too late and now…" I yelled back at him, stalling on the end of my sentence. She hadn't been just my second, just my Major, just my friend or just my lover – she had become my life, my reason for living, my 'be all and end all'.

"I KNOW!" He spun and screamed back at me. I had to stop and take an unsteady step back. I had never seen Daniel this agitated before.

"Daniel, c'mon let's just go." Janet tried to reason.

"NO! God dammit Jack! You think we are not feeling it as well? You think you are the only one who is missing Sam? She was like a sister to me! She was Janet's best friend! You are so wrapped up in your own pity, your own grief, that you don't see how other people who loved her are suffering as well!" Though he tried, I could hear his voice was breaking with every sentence. I couldn't help but feel a little ashamed of my behaviour. I stayed silent watching the play of emotion erupt across his face.

"At least you were with her Jack…" his voice had become solemn, "…at least you had the chance – no matter how crappy it was – to say goodbye. Where was I? I'll tell you where, I was in my office, translating some piece of meaningless rock. I was here while my friend – my sister – was dying in the arms of my best friend." He choked out. I cast my eyes to Janet when I heard a second sob, Daniel hearing it as well and turning to draw her into his arms.

I swayed a little on my feet. The crunch of shoes on gravel alerted me to the sound of Daniel and Janet walking away, the fingers of their closest hands tangled together. Were they together? Had I missed something? I was precariously hanging between the states of too drunk to help anybody or to drive home – hell I doubted I'd even make it home on foot – and not drunk enough to be having this kind of conversation. I groaned and hauled my pliant body after Daniel and the Doc.

"Good evening, Sir. Ma'am. Doctor Jackson." The young airman greeted Janet and I with a salute. I merely nodded in his direction as I concentrated on not looking as drunk as a skunk.

"Evening Greg, how long you on for tonight?" Daniel asked.

"Here until 0200 Doctor."

"Ouch! Another 6 hours."

"And 15 minutes Doctor, not that I am counting." The young airman – Glen, Grant, Grrr… something replied while we took turns signing in. From time to time, I had been known to use a bogus name just to keep the greenies on their toes. I considered it tonight but signing J. J. O'Neill was much easier than Alexander Graham Bell when intoxicated.

I fell into step with Daniel and Janet as they headed down the corridor to the first elevator. I really did not want to be here, especially since I had a suspicion as to the reason.

It was almost 8pm, so the base was fairly empty of staff, especially with little Gate activity. We stepped out of the elevator car.

"This way Grace." I whispered. She merely nodded and followed without making a sound. Without me telling her, she understood that we should not be here. The door to the MALP bay was open. I stopped by the door and performed a cursory sweep but couldn't see anyone. I looked behind me and motioned for Grace to take my hand before moving into the room and walking swiftly with her almost hugged to my body. Upon entering the storage area, I saw that the mirror was open. I could see Teal'c standing, waiting for us holding up the board with my translated message. I smiled and turned to close the door when a hand appeared causing me to jump.

"Samantha." Charlie drawled, his voice making my skin crawl. I hardened my resolve and stood tall in front of him.

"What do you want Charlie?"

"I want you to come with me." He replied. I shook my head and edged backwards toward the mirror.

"I'm not going anywhere with you Charlie. We are leaving this place."

He smirked and laughed, his hand coming up to his chin. Suddenly, with lightning reflexes, he reached for Gracie's arm and hauled her to his body ignoring her frightened cry of "Mummy!", his arm holding her firm.

"Yes, you are, Samantha." He responded, then put a zat to her head.

Sucking in a breath and stifling a cry, "No! Please don't hurt her. I'll do whatever you say." I replied and came closer to him.

"That's better." He smiled and released Grace. Idiot. With one swift movement – just like Jack taught me – a pulled Gracie with one hand, then laid my other on his left shoulder and kneed him as hard as I could. I watched him crumble to the ground, gasping and swearing.

"Don't you ever threaten my child again Charlie." I spat out, then turned to usher her to the mirror. "Gracie, this is the special mirror."

"Where is Daddy?" She looked up and asked.

"He'll be there." I smiled, hoping I wasn't lying to her. She smiled back and reached out to the touch the mirror, then reappeared on the other side. I saw Teal'c come to her immediately and crouch down, a gentle smile on his face. Now it was my turn.

"Sam… wait!" He choked out. "You can't go, we need you here." He coughed, then gingerly got to his feet. "I need you here."

I scowled, "The only people who need me are beyond that mirror." I answered, then turned and reached out to touch the smooth surface. Coming out the other side, Teal'c moved forward to greet me.

"Samantha O'Neill, it is good to see you again."

"Same here Teal'c." I laughed, "Wow, this still feels weird you know." I said gestured to him as an ally rather than enemy. Seeing the man before me being as different as he was here made me wish my Jack had met him under better circumstances in our world. "Teal'c, this is Grace."

"Hello!" She said in her bright little girl voice, then smiled just like Jack. My emotion caught in my throat. How I loved that smile. I missed it. I hoped I would see it again.

"Greetings, Grace O'Neill." He said warmly. "It is good to meet you." Teal'c turned to me, "Daniel Jackson shall arrive momentarily."

"Will Jack be with him?" I asked.

"That I do not know. O'Neill is troubled. I fear he may be lost to us." He said gravely.

"Sadly, I know what he is going through. I hope I ca-ahhhmmmm…" My words became muffled as a hand came over my mouth then died in my throat when whatever was on the cloth coursed it way through my nose and mouth into my lungs, my vision swimming. The sound of a zat filtered through my brain, Gracie's mouth open in a scream, Teal'c's massive form swaying… what was wrong with my eyes… so heh-veee…

Stepping out of the elevator, I locked eyes with Daniel when the sound of a scream, a child's cry of "Mummy!" and a zat filled the stagnant air, causing me to break into a sprint, my impending hangover all but forgotten. I didn't need to check if the others were behind me, I could hear their footfalls pounding on the concrete. As we approached the MALP room, General Hammond came around the corner.

"Jack! I take it you heard that as well?"

"Yes, we did, Sir." I replied as I ran through the MALP room and into storage 3B. The face of a crying and very scared little girl, a woozy looking Teal'c on one knee – a look of sheer determination on his face – and Kawalsky struggling with another Sam as she lost consciousness. I noted the white handkerchief over her nose and mouth.

"Daddy!" The girl wailed, then ran at full tilt toward my legs, barrelling into me with a force I had not felt in years. Daddy. Right, daughter. His daughter.

"Shh… it's OK." I soothed. Daniel's presence at her side allowed me to focus on the man in front of me. The man who had a version of my beloved slumped in his arms.

"Kawalsky! What the hell are you doing?" I bellowed, my loud voice causing the headache to come back. I pushed the pain aside.

"She's coming with me Jack. This one is ours, not yours."

"This one? She's not a commodity you bastard, and it's Colonel or Sir to you." I bit back. I could still hear the girl crying behind me, and Daniel trying his hardest to get her out of the room.

He laughed in the same timbre that my Kawalsky had when the snake had taken him over. "I don't think so Jack, you see you're dead over there, I'm 2IC of the base, I don't report you." He jeered.

"No, but you do report to me Lieutenant Colonel." A deep Texan voice growled behind me. "You will release her and leave." Hammond ordered. I felt a small hand wrap itself around mine and looked down to see a determined little face staring at him.

"You leave my Mummy alone Uncle Charlie." Grace demanded in a voice that sounded a little like Sam and a lot like me. I lifted my other hand to her silky brownish-blonde hair. So, this was Grace. A pain lanced through my chest. She was something I never had the chance to have with my Sam… unless… no! Stop that O'Neill, she wouldn't, there's no way! I admonished my wayward thoughts.

"No, I don't think I will." Kawalsky said, taking a step backwards. "You stay here with your father. Your real Daddy." He said with distain as if what he was saying made any sense at all. I looked behind him at the mirror and found none other than Makepeace standing there – hands on hips – waiting for his henchman to return.

"You rat bastard! You threw your lot in with him. He works for the NID." I yelled. There was no way I was letting any version of Sam back through that mirror with him on the other side. It might be another reality, but men like Makepeace didn't change.

"Yes, and once they take over, we'll have better technology without the societal confines. That was one thing you never budged on Jack. That's why you're dead." He confessed.

"What! You killed him for having morals?" Now I had heard everything. After so many years of black ops, I saw the SGC and protecting Earth as my salvation. I guess he did as well.

He snorted, "No, he killed you because his God told him to." He snapped, motioning to Teal'c with his chin, "We just made sure you were in position instead of off celebrating in the wilds." Of course, it had been their first anniversary. She had told him that. I'd have taken her to Minnesota, I guess he would have as well. At some point I had started thinking of him and her and me and Sam as if we were the same people. We weren't. Nevertheless, I took a step forward.

"Ah ah Colonel." Kawalsky said, bringing a large combat knife up to Sam's throat. I stopped, cursing myself for again thinking of Samantha as my Sam. I was startled by a frantic Grace.

"Mummy, noooo!" Grace cried. Every part of me that was in contact with her felt warm. I looked down to see her with a strange glow, her eyes almost golden. "Leave her alonnnnnnne!" She screamed, her body flashing white, streams of light coming off her in all directions, so bright I had to shield my eyes. It happened so fast, then she was back to normal. I'd seen that before, in the infirmary. I looked up locking eyes with Daniel then back to the scene before me.

All that was left of the mirror was a pile of molten naquadah cracking with golden electricity, and Kawalsky… slumped against the back wall. The bloodied knife on the floor beside him.

"Errr… was that what I think…" I started to say before I noticed a crumpled Sam on the floor, head lolled to the side, bleeding profusely from a wound in her neck, Grace kneeling before her crying. "No." I moaned. I couldn't do this again. "Janet!" I yelled for the Doc. She might not be mine, but she was still Sam. I rushed in to move Grace's hands so I could apply pressure. "Sam, stay with me please." I begged as her warm sticky blood feeling far too familiar. I couldn't believe this was happening. Not again.

I felt myself sliding back to that day. Sam gasping and screaming as she convulsed on the ground, her blood and dirt everywhere. The metallic smell of her life spilling from her wound and the fried electronics from the downed UAV. "Sam, don't you leave me! That's an order Major!" I yelled as I applied pressure, not even thinking about the fact that she was not in the Air Force.

"Daddy." Grace said, I shook my head when I felt her replace my hands with hers. She closed her eyes, a soft yellow glow spread out across Samantha's neck sealing the wound and stopping the bleeding just as Janet appeared by our side, her mouth forming a perfect O at what she had just witnessed.

"Colonel…" We looked at each other remembering the last time we had seen this. I swallowed and looked back to the girl.

"Ah Grace… that's your name, isn't it?" I asked. She looked up and nodded. "Umm…" I looked at Daniel, Janet, and Hammond again then back to her before furrowing my eyebrows.

"What was that?" I asked. She merely smiled at me, then back at her mother. Pressing her small hands to Samantha's head and heart, she closed her eyes then that same soft golden yellow glow appeared again. The same as Ayiana did in Antarctica to the others before I succumbed to the fever.

"She's half Ancient, Jack." I heard Daniel murmur behind me. I looked back at the little girl who looked like the hallucination that my Sam told me about from her Prometheus mission. She was a perfect blend of Sam and me, and I found that I was jealous of the alternate Jack that he had the opportunity to give life to such a perfect little being.