You and Sans crouch around the corner of a house watching from far enough away to not be noticeable.
You see a younger Sans, perhaps twelve years old or less, shivering in the snow behind a house. He has a hat, coat and gloves, but he seems shaken by something. Maybe the reason he is shivering is not because he's cold.
A small Papyrus comes hurtling from the distance. "SANS!" he yells. It's adorable because his voice is so childlike yet still so loud like his older self.
Papyrus kneels next to Sans, who's sniffling. "THAT WAS AWESOME! I DIDN'T KNOW YOU COULD DO THAT! I WANT TO MAKE SOME TOO!"
"i'm not good enough. i tried. it didn't work!" Sans is sniffling and breathing a little too hard, like he's been panicked and scared by something...or someone.
"YOU MADE DOG HEADS LIKE DAD! CAN YOU TEACH ME TOO!?"
"well..." Sans brushed some tears away and looked at his brother's excited face. "i'm just not very good at it. i couldn't get them to attack the targets. he said i was a failure. a disgrace."
Papyrus, young as he is, maybe only around seven years old, seems to understand. You think you detect a shadow of sadness pass over his face, a hint of some inner wisdom beyond his years. He draws himself up proudly, marching a short distance away on his short legs.
"NO BROTHER OF MINE IS A DISGRACE! YOU ARE VERY GREAT! NO ONE CAN BE THE BROTHER OF THE GREAT PAPYRUS WITHOUT BEING SOMEONE AMAZING! NYEH HEH HEH!"
Sans looks a little happier, although still upset.
"thanks pap. i...i don't want them to attack. i just want to talk to them. it must be interesting to live in the void. different than here at least. but he said,"
Sans imitates a much older male voice:
"They're just weapons, Sans. Instruments of your will. You have to learn to defend yourself. If we ever make it out of the underground, you'll be completely and utterly defenseless if a human attacks you and you're not prepared for it. What if there's another war?"
Papyrus looks slightly taken aback by the intimidating imitation that Sans did, but then his enthusiasm and strength bubbles forth again.
"DO NOT WORRY, SANS! I WILL PROTECT YOU! I'll GROW UP TO BE THE BEST WARRIOR THE WORLD HAS EVER KNOWN! THEN YOUR BLASTERS DON'T EVER HAVE TO FIGHT!"
Young Sans looks amused by his bold declarations, but also rather touched.
"aw, thanks. guess i won't just be having a good time with them, i'll be having a dog time!"
"SANS! NO JOKES! I WAS BEING SERIOUS AND COOL!"
"i know, i know," he says cheekily, but behind his teasing expression you see he now has a tentative but genuine grin.
The scene fades away, and you're back in Snowdin again, although at what looks like a more neutral time.
You smile at Sans, who shrugs, looking happier after watching that memory.
You comment, "Your Blasters really are awesome. They seem like they just want to play and goof around," thinking fondly of the one that was kind to you before.
"i know, right? doesn't matter if the Blasters are void weapons. they're just like puppy dogs. they have feelings. and dogs really seem to like being around papyrus. they're always hanging around him, trying to get him to throw them a bone. he always acts annoyed because he says they just wanna chew on him, but i think he secretly likes them too. sometimes the Blasters and dogs all chase him around like he's a movie star and then he finally lets them catch him and it all turns into one big cool dog pile..."
He draws a breath, as if he's preparing to explain something, his expression growing more serious.
"anyway, all of that was to say...he's the reason I have anything good in me at all...and what happened here...kind of wrecked all of that for me."
"so if you're looking for me to learn your abilities, and they're the type that rely on good properties of a soul..."
He shrugs again.
"well."
His eye lights black out and his next words are heavily laden with despair.
"i don't think i can help you anymore."
You stare at him for a moment. He seems so lost somehow, like he's lost all trust and faith in himself and almost everyone else. Everyone except maybe for one person, who keeps dying.
"But ... when you healed me earlier...You felt...warm. Like how my dog did."
You're not sure what you're trying to say, and you almost start stuttering, but you charge boldly ahead anyway.
"Not saying you're fuzzy like she was..." Sans looks amused, and that seems to make his eye lights return to their normal starry state. "But it felt...nice."
He thinks about that.
"i hurt you," he says quietly, darkly.
You choose your words carefully. You can't minimize what happened, for your own sake, and his.
"Yeah," you sigh. "It hurt like hell. Believe me, I know how when you're hurting, it's a lot harder to see how your actions affect other people, including people who didn't have anything to do with hurting you."
"But...I've done things I regret too. Maybe a little mercy is in order. I know you were in the middle of a death fight, and it was my own fault for charging into the middle of those feelings without considering enough how you felt. Just because bad things happened to you, it doesn't make you a bad person."
He looks like he needs to explain something, with his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels.
"but i took it out on you. even though i knew better. i wanted to believe you were the enemy because of your LV and because of chara, but i knew from your expressions you weren't really the cause of it."
With deep tones of self-hatred and anger, he explains,
"that means i've lost the ability to judge properly. my own anger is stronger than my ability to believe in people."
You shake your head.
"Sans...you were acting ultimately out of self-defense, and defense of others. I knew it wasn't out of malice towards me personally."
"That attack did hurt really really bad, yes. Physically. But you know what? You gutting me with bones is not nearly the most painful thing that's happened to me. That happened long ago, with how my family treated me."
He gives you a concerned look. "seriously? it was worse than someone almost killing you? what the hell kind of childhood did you have, anyway?"
You pause and think carefully about how to explain before answering.
"Intent is everything, right? Maybe that's not just true with monsters. Your own family trying to slowly destroy your soul hurts a lot worse than someone trying to kill you because they're mad about their friends and family being killed over and over. And not only that, you freaked them out by kidnapping them and taking them to your ship and showing them you can essentially control their world with a computer. Plus, they can see you're possessed by the same spirit that's been killing everyone, even though you don't realize it till much later."
"So it did hurt...but when you healed me...something about you felt really good. I know for sure there's a lot of good in you after that. Even if you don't believe it."
He stares at you for a moment, surprised. Then he grins a little. "to be honest, it was kind of nice on my end too."
You hadn't expected that. "Really?" you ask honestly, feeling vulnerable.
"really. look, we've both been through a lot...but maybe there's still something inside of us that wants to try."
You nod. "Yeah, maybe there is."
You sense him focusing. The scene changes, and you're back in Snowdin, when the genocide happened.
Sans glances at the blue barrier wall leading to the eastern side, then back at you, somehow swallowing heavily like he hates his life right now. He heaves a long sigh, and walks with sad steps towards it. Wonderingly, you follow him.
As you get closer, you notice that it seems to be made of something like magic glowing blue bricks.
Sans drops to his knees on the snow and stares at them for a moment, reluctance written all over his expression. But he reaches out a hand anyway, and determinedly takes hold of a brick and tugs it backward, finally wrestling it free. He puts it carefully on the ground.
He checks on you and sees the question mark above your head.
"wanna help?" he asks you in a friendly tone, nodding at the wall.
"Sure!" you answer, scrambling to assist. You're not sure what he wants to show you, but you realize it's important to him. You have some guesses what this is about, because of where you are, but you don't know for sure.
The two of you manage to clear a small space away, but when you look behind it, you're surprised to see yet another layer of bricks.
Sans shrugs. "what can i say? i made this barrier pretty thick. we're gonna be here awhile."
"You really don't want to remember whatever's here." It's so obvious, you're not making it sound like a question.
He stops and puts down his most recent brick. He hunches over with his hands in his pockets, turning away from you and shutting down.
You wait patiently for a reply, not daring to speak again for a long time, until he starts to worry you. Only a tiny shudder running through him every now and again tells you he's not unconscious, or worse.
Finally you reach out and brush the bony knuckles of his phalanges with your hand, and he flinches, but his body becomes alive again.
"sorry. zoned out there for a minute," he says.
His white eye lights look soft and sad.
He briefly meets your gaze before looking away again.
"to answer your question..."
"No," he says in a dead voice, and you hear in its timbre how he's changing fonts briefly. "I don't."
He goes back to removing bricks, more slowly now.
Despite what he says about not wanting to do this, something's driving him to show this to you anyway. Why?
You redouble your efforts. Whatever the reason, since he thinks it's the right thing to do, you'll keep trying to get through this wall, even though your own fear is building with every brick you remove.