'Eventful' was how Lydia described her and Edmund's trip to Archenland. Even after a few hours sleep, the awkward tension between them was palpable and the ride home only highlighted this.
The minute they arrived back at Cair Pavarel, Edmund handed his reins to Boreas then dashed off to see Peter and the others.
Lydia waved Boreas away and led Celer back to the stables herself. Once again she felt out of place, even more so than usual as the only person who seemed to understand how she felt was currently not speaking to her.
She spent about half an hour in the stables and was only interrupted by Peter who came to find her.
"Lydia! There you are, I've been looking for you everywhere.
Lydia didn't look up when he came in.
"What can I do for you Peter?"
Peter walked over and gave the horse in the next stall, presumably his own mount, a grand looking black stallion a sugarcube.
"Well how did the mission go?" he asked, his eyes on his own horse. "How was Archenland? Edmund told us there was trouble."
Lydia put her brush down and patted Celer "Well the Calormen army looked like it was all there, not that I'm an expert of course and then we had to make a retreat to avoid being spotted. Though I'm sure Edmunds mentioned that already" she added hastily.
Peter pressed on, "And it wasn't all too much for you? You coped alright?" He looked slightly nervous about asking this, like he was expecting Lydia to start crying on his shoulder that no she couldn't cope and was therefore leaving immediately.
"No" she answered slowly, "actually I felt pretty good, like for the first time I could think clearly."
Peter smiled and nodded, "I know exactly how you feel. It sounds terrible to say it but I feel most myself when I'm fighting, more Peter than a king." He trailed off for a moment and stared up at the outline of Cair Pavarel through the stable door.
Lydia watched the lines of worry etched almost permanently on this young man and considered for the first time that maybe she was in a better position than the Pevensies.
"Anyway," Peter shook his head and the easy smile returned, "We should make sure you're able to defend yourself."
Lydia's eyes widened, "You mean like with swords?"
"Yes of course, what else did you think I meant? Just the basics mind you, just so you can defend yourself during the battle. I'll have Edmund come and-"
Lydia held up a hand, "I'd rather you teach me Peter" she said firmly but to her dismay Peter shook his head.
"I would but you'd be better off with Edmund."
"But aren't you the better swordsman?" she asked her lips pouting slightly. The cheap flattery seemed to soften Peter and for a moment she thought he would change his mind but then he frowned.
"Ed has always bested me in a fight but that's not the point, I can use a sword but I can't really explain how I do it. You'd be better off with him."
His eyes narrowed suspiciously, "What's going on with the two of you anyway? Edmund acted very oddly when your name was mentioned earlier."
He sighed when she visibly blanched, "Well whatever it is, it needs to stop alright? We can't have you both at odds over the next few weeks."
He stopped to look at up at the sun, "Must be nearly noon, I have to go."
He turned away but Lydia touched him on the shoulder.
"Peter please, I-"
But Peter had already set off into a jog, "Go ask Edmund" he called over his shoulder as he went.
"Great" Lydia hissed to herself and turned round when she realised Celer was laughing at her.
"Just admit you like him dear and get all this over with. I saw you both last night you know" she said smugly.
"And I would prefer it if you kept that to yourself" Lydia said firmly.
#
Lydia was perfectly happy to spend the rest of the day in the stables, it was a pleasant surprise to find that despite only being a beginner, she was really beginning to enjoy horse riding. It was one of the simpler factors in the 'reasons to stay' list she'd had in her head for a few days now.
She'd just finished helping Boreas shoe one of the younger mares when Peter appeared again, this time looking flustered.
"Ah Boreas, am I alright to steal Lydia away for a moment?"
Boreas swept a low bow and offered a small smile to Lydia. The satyr had begrudgingly allowed Lydia to spend time in the stables and it seemed her persistence at offering the hand of friendship had finally paid off.
Peter pulled Lydia outside and said in a hushed voice, "Listen, Lydia I'll get right to it. We could really do with you getting in contact with Aslan. I know," he said holding up a hand to silence her when she tried to interrupt, "I know you upset him. But that's all in the past now and I'm sure if you apologise it'll be enough."
Lydia looked at him with measured eyes, "Okay" she said, "I'll try but why do you need him?"
"We just need his blessing on what were about to do." Peter let out a low laugh, "Some of our advisers and generals still think the four of us are too young to make these sorts of decisions. We've always depended on Aslan."
Lydia was tempted to tell Peter to ignore Aslan and do his own thing. Why should Kings and Queens take advice from a talking lion? The whole idea was preposterous. But then she stopped. Talk like that would never go down well in Narnia, not while it was Aslan's country.
Instead she bit down all these thoughts and nodded, "I'll see what I can do."
#
If Lydia was being positive she would say that no news is always good news and no response from Aslan perhaps meant that he'd forgiven her, maybe he was just a little busy at the moment.
As it was, she'd gone up to her room to be alone but that just ended up with her pacing round the room. What exactly did Peter want her to say? Hey Aslan I know I don't command you but I'm still here and we need your help?
How did anyone cope before she arrived? And why was it her that had this burden?
I can't win she'd thought miserably. Either I speak to him and I make things worse or I don't speak to him and I upset Peter and the others.
She'd gone to bed frustrated and confused and when morning brought no joy, she'd resorted to banging her head against the bed frame.
"I'm not going to apologise for our last conversation." She said to the room, "But the others need your help so any sign of life would be good."
No sign of life.
Lydia sighed, rubbed a hand over the mark she'd made on her head from bashing the head frame then walked out her chamber and slammed the door.
She'd try again later.
At breakfast Peter immediately took her aside, "Well did you have any luck?" He asked in hushed tone.
Lydia shook her head "No, I couldn't manage it sorry." She tried not to cringe when Peter visibly drooped.
"Maybe it's a one way thing, I have to wait until he feels the need to speak to me." She suggested and Peter nodded.
"Maybe"
Speaking up he threw an arm round Lydia, "Right we'll make a start on your weapon training today!" he said loud enough for the others to hear him.
Edmund looked up from where he was sitting, "And who's supervising that?"
"You are."
The brothers stared at each other with Susan looking on with amusement then finally Edmund looked away.
"Suppose it makes sense" he said gruffly. He cast an eye over on Lydia and she fought back a blush and stared back determinedly.
"Give me half an hour to go sort something out" he said and she barely had time to nod before he'd rushed out the room.
Lucy passed him on the way into breakfast, her plaits swinging. "Wha'ts wrong with him?" she asked picking up an apple and taking a bite.
Lydia and Peter exchanged glances, "Its me." She said, "I don't think he wants to train me to use a sword"
"Oh is that all?" Lucy said around a mouthful of apple, "You guys need to sort out whatever is going on, I know you care a lot about each other."
"Yes that might be the problem." Lydia muttered under her breath.
Still, when the half an hour was up, she bid farewell to the others and made her way into the courtyard where she'd seen some of the soldiers train before, more frequently since war had been declared.
She was expecting to see Edmund waiting for her, perhaps with two blunted swords or a dummy she could practice on but when she arrived, the place was empty except for a dryad who was waiting, smiling pleasantly.
"You must be Lydia, I'm Meliae." She said going to shake her hand. Her hand was cool to the touch and had a silver glow round it. Lydia stared a little, lost for words; shed seen dryads around Cair Pavarel but had never actually spoken to one.
She blinked and forced her mouth to move, "Where's Edmund?"
"I'm over here" Edmund emerged out from behind a large willow tree. "I thought we should start with a stranger, you know me too well."
Lydia said nothing so he continued "Anyway were just going to start with a simple fight using these." He held up two wooden swords, "Just so I can see where you are at."
Lydia took the swords and handed one to Meliae "Go easy on me" she said with a small smile, "I've never done this before, I probably won't be any good."
Meliae laughed and her high voice sounded almost musical when she said, "Don't worry, I'm sure we'll be fine."
"Okay well looks like we're ready to start then." Edmund folded his arms and leant on the tree "Meliae you make the first move."
Lydia was still watching Edmund when suddenly she felt a rush of air in front of her as Meliae slashed her sword down and she brought her sword up to meet it just in time. The impact of the two swords meeting threw her off balance and she stepped forward before attempting to jab her sword into Meliae's side. Meliae blocked her and Lydia tried again aiming for her leg this time but again she was blocked.
They parried like this for a while until Lydia could feel sweat trickling down her neck, she was beginning to wish she'd put her hair up, the simple hairband she was wearing was only just keeping it out of her eyes.
She wanted to call for a break but she could feel Edmund watching her every move despite his attempts to look disinterested and that made her determined not to give up.
He thought she wasn't worth his time anymore? Fine, she'd show him.
She started aiming for Meliae's legs, aiming to trip her up and Meliae jumped and then Lydia hit her in the chest and for a moment she'd thought she was going to win and then she felt a hand over her face and her hair band was roughly yanked over her head. Her dark brown hair fell down over her face and as she moved to brush it out the way, she felt a heavy blow just about her left thigh and she fell to the floor.
"Okay okay I concede" she said angrily tucking her hair behind her ear. "That was a dirty trick" she said when Meliae handed her back her hairband.
The dryad shrugged, "His Majesty asked me to make sure you didn't win."
"Did he now?" Lydia muttered allowing Meliae to help her foot.
"I'd be happy to do this again" the dryad said then turned to look at Edmund, "Am I alright to go? I need to get back to my river"
Edmund nodded and took the swords off her, "Thanks Meliae" and the dryad bobbed a quick curtsey then danced gracefully away.
Lydia eyed the swords resting in Edmunds hand, "Do you want me to lose to you now as well?"
Edmund huffed, "I wasn't trying to humiliate you, I make sure that all my trainees lose early on so they know how it feels."
"Hmm" Lydia folded her arms "Are you sure it wasn't your way for revenge?"
Edmund glared at her "That's unfair, you know it's not that, I told you I wouldn't get upset."
"Then what is it then?" Lydia demanded.
His brown eyes flashed "It's you!" Edmund burst out, "I told you how I felt and instead of a yes or no, you're just going to leave me hanging until you finally go back to England."
He sighed, "Look if you only see me as a friend, just say and we can go back to-"
Lydia reached up and kissed him and any worries she'd had about him pushing her away disappeared when he dropped the swords to reach up and run his hand through her hair.
It felt different this time, she was still annoyed with him, annoyed at his impatience and by the way he was nipping at her lip, she knew he was angry at her too. But it was good too.
She'd had a few kisses in school cloakrooms back in England and she knew enough to know that this could work, if she gave it a chance.
She broke away, "Ed, I'm sorry for not being clear, I knew I liked you when you asked me." She looked down, "But I can't let you influence my decision to stay and if we start something then I'll stay because of you and then the guilt of leaving my family will drive me insane."
"And you'll end up resenting me" Edmund finished for her pressing his forehead to hers.
"So what do you want to do about it?"
Lydia resisted the urge to lean into him, "I just want to take it slow for now"
Edmund nodded and opened his mouth to say something else when they were interrupted by a small cough.
"Err Your Majesty excuse me"
They both sprang apart. A gangly nervous looking boy was stood at the entrance to the courtyard holding a box of wooden swords and dressed in armour that looked too big.
Edmund's eyes darted round nervously. "Gosh Alaric is it time for your lessons already? Is everyone else here yet? No? Okay well you just go and put those there and I'll be with you in a minute."
Lydia giggled, "We haven't done anything Edmund, stop worrying."
Edmund gave her that familiar crooked grin, "I know, I just didn't want Alaric seeing, he's scared enough of me as it is."
"Who is he anyway?"
"Oh I'm training up him and some of friends to use swords, about twenty of them." There was a loud clatter behind them where the young boy had knocked over a crate.
Edmund smiled fondly, "They're a good bunch really, Alaric there is one of the quickest."
Lydia peered over his shoulder to watch him unpack some armour, "He's very young" she said
"About thirteen"
Lydia raised an eyebrow at his casual tone, "And why are you training them again?"
Edmund now looked uncomfortable and his smile was gone, "It's just a precaution" he said in a low voice, "In case the worst should happen."
"Edmund he's too young!" Lydia hissed at him and made to walk over to Alaric, now bent over a box of helmets but Edmund pulled her back.
"Not here he's not, in Narnia its normal and you must get used to it."
She glared at him then watched as a group of boys, no older than Alaric all ran across the courtyard to join him, laughing as they ran.
"I'll be over in a minute" Edmund called over then turned back to Lydia with a pitying look on his face.
"Believe me when I say you'll see a lot worse before this is through."