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I don't own anything related to Fate/stay night; this is a work of parody.
Act One: Trial
False Transmigration Of The Soul (Music) /c1sZ2q1ZFUY
There was a dream.
I am in the playground, and the swing rises and falls. Faster and faster, a woman pushes me. I am trying to get off to go somewhere, but the woman just pushes me more and more...
She pushes me until I fall off and break apart at the seams like a doll.
A man is running in the park. I ask him where he is going? He tells me he is going in the wrong direction, but why would you run in the wrong direction from where you are trying to reach? I start running after him, but I can't quite reach him.
There is a girl with black hair in the snowy park. She tells me she is my sister; she asks me to choose between her and the running.
But I don't stop, and she cracks apart like a broken mirror.
To the right was that sword impaled into stone, one that is ever-present, yet also ever distant in my mind. Yet It is broken and dead, a rusted and nameless end to something that once did shine. A lone hortensia lays on the boundary. That is the end.
To the left lay three bodies covered in crimson: two red boys cut apart and a black-haired girl trembling above them. Yet she became so soaked in that blood that she drowned and became a pure vermillion. That is the beginning.
I am soaked too. I try to clean it off.
I am in the bath, yet no matter how much I wash, I can't make the dirtiness come off me. A man with a face I could not see comes. He washes me the best he can, but even as it comes off the feeling of ugliness never leaves me.
The world is built on a thin thread, fall over that, and you find yourself on the wrong side. One side holds all you wish to forget; the other holds the small goodness you cling to.
Breakfast was always the start of another great everyday! I'm thinking meat... there is already a stringy taste in my mouth, and I think it would be nice to spread that to others. Everyone should feast.
Chicken then, you can't go wrong with that! No one interrupts me as I cook. But where is everyone? I eat breakfast alone, but when I look down at my food, all I see are the dead faces of everyone looking back. Ah... I ate them too.
And even I am just a feast for the ugly things of the world in the end.
Swords grow out from my body, and shapeless monsters eat me from the inside out, and the dream ends.
I wake up coughing. I am in my room. It is cold. My head hurts. A pulsing comes through my body and makes it hard to think.
Everything is fine.
... Someone is saying something or yelling. "...!" It is distant to my ears, and I feel like it is far away. I am on the wrong side of the horizon, but I begin to move anyways.
It is a labyrinth, a shady place. I walk slowly, clinging to the walls. Where am I going? What if there is no escape?
There is that voice... I must reach that... It should be easy. It is right there! But every time I move, I feel like I am slipping back. That something is... not letting leave without it.
There are other voices... who are more clear yet carry horrible whispers. They try to lead me astray.
Why go on living? It's just a waste. You should commit suicide!
My husband cheated on me, so I killed him. All adulterers must die!
I thieved, and my hands were cut off. My suffering should be spread! All thieves must be punished!
She was an enemy who claimed to be a saint, so of course, we executed her! All heretics must be burned!
I don't leave the path for a moment, and I refuse to carry their suffering with me. Leave it here, in this musky place where it can be contained. Let it rest.
"..." The right voice comes through.
The voice, the right voice! Please lead me to that! I frantically cling to the walls and come upon a door: a sliding door to a place familiar.
You may leave, but that doesn't mean you have escaped.
I open the sliding door and fall through to the right side of the horizon.
(Music Stop.)
"Shirou!" Someone comes and holds me up before I collapse. "Are you alright?"
"Ahh...?" It is like having your ears unclogged by water. I can hear the world again; slowly, I am being taken back from the bottom of that dark lake.
"Shirou... you... thank goodness you're awake." Dad held me close to him. It felt like he didn't want to let go. He was not an intimate man. But the hug was not so much intimate as it was desperate.
My head still hurts, "Ugh, did I miss breakfast... I need to..."
"No, Shirou. you were asleep... all of yesterday."
"Huh? But how did you eat then?" Without me, he is useless. I should have been there. What was I even really doing?
"Shirou... that's not the issue here," Dad said in a frustrated tone. He looked at me with bad eyes with Suspicion and Hatred. No...
He must hate me now... I don't even know what I did wrong. If you hate me, then I am nothing.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry..." Tears almost started to come to me. I'm so weak. "You hate me..." He held me steady. If he denies me, then I will crumble.
"No... Listen, Shirou. I do not hate you." He spoke the truth with a firm voice. He didn't hate me, then who did he hate? He tried to guide me to the table, "Now Shirou, why don't you sit down. I can manage s-"
"No! I can make breakfast!" I can't be a burden any further. I was already moving to the kitchen to start.
Taking a long look at me, he relents. I don't dare to look at him for fear of seeing his genuine emotions towards me. "...Alright, that sounds good..." Dad relented with a soft tone.
I moved entirely into the kitchen, but I found that we were not alone. She was so quiet that even Dad seemed to have forgotten her at the moment.
A violet girl stood in the corner of the room, almost blending into the environment. Her color was too strange, though, to ever fit in with a crowd.
Her eyes were back to being dead, but it could be said that there was something in them now that couldn't be taken away.
"Shirou... we need to talk about what happened." Dad looked between us.
"Well, I am... confused." I did swear to protect Sakura., but I didn't remember taking her home. Not that I think that this is bad, I believe that this is good. She is safe here.
"That's Sakura; she is my best friend." Her eyes shined a little with intelligence when I said that. I said it because I had learned over time that she seemed to like it when I said it.
"Matou Sakura... yes, that I could gather. That was about all she would say..." Everything I said innocently would make Dad uncomfortable. "Your... best friend...?" He massaged his temples with his fingers. "I... don't know what to say, Shirou. This is all my fault..." He sat down absentmindedly. "Alright, Shirou... now what-" he was interrupted by a sudden sound.
A noise echoed through the house. It was the noise of the front entrance. "Shirou! I'm here!" The usual suspect came in fast.
"Taiga... you see, maybe today-" Dad tried to speak up quickly to stop her with logic, but he was paid no heed.
"You were sick yesterday, Shirou! That is unacceptable, mister!" She held out her finger accusingly—victim-blaming at its finest.
"It was only one day." The only day I had ever missed school. Maybe... I'm not sure.
"One day too many! Your grades will slip, and you will drop out, and then you will forget even how to cook for me anymore!?"
"I don't think that is how it works. I'm sorry, though, it will never happen again."
She held me close, "Ah, Shirou... I forgive you. I wasn't here yesterday anyways! You know you should be encouraging me; I ate all by myself!" She wasn't even here!?
Fuji-nee was mad at the thought that she would have possibly not had my service had she needed it. I don't know if she can be saved at this point.
"Yes, Fuji-nee. I am quite proud of you; maybe you won't need me anymore then?"
"What! No! How can you say that!? Evens a joke, Shirou, some things you can't say." She had a severe expression, as If I was bullying her.
"Well... then I will continue my servitude then." Dad wasn't listening to this; he was too busy looking at the wall while drinking his tea. He was as broken as I was. I went to work."Breakfast will be ready soon. No meat today." I didn't feel like having meat right now for some reason.
"Yes, sir! That's the otouto I love the most, the one who does the work without complaint!" She exclaimed as she took my service a bit for granted. One day I would have to stop suddenly to make her realize her reliance and hopefully learn of her mistake; that day would be the day I would be found mangled by a hungry tiger.
I made a fast meal, and we started eating. I was almost peaceful. The reason was that Taiga was acting very confusing for some reason. She was looking around with suspicious eyes. We ate a little longer until a shriek came out. "Wah? Who is this!?" Taiga finally pointed out the girl she had sat beside for five minutes. "Kiritsugu-san, don't tell me you adopted another one!?"
"Taiga..." I sighed. I am thankful for Fuji-nee, always. Well, when she's not throwing trash at my feet, at least. She can be a good distraction, though, and that was something that may be good right now. She is a bit blind sometimes, though.
"That is not the case here... it seems that she is Shirou's friend," Dad said coldly.
"A friend!? Like that red girl- no, this one seems much more polite and cute! C'mon, what's the name!" I noticed Dad's brow twitch when he heard Fuji-nee mention a red girl, but it seemed that Dad had calmed enough not to hold his head anymore.
"Matou... Sakura." Sakura eeked out.
"Sakura! Oh, what a cute name!" Sakura grimaced a bit as Taiga became affectionate towards her. I had felt the same way when I first met Taiga... to a soul like Fuji-nee, who is so pure. She cannot fathom the existence of people who take positivity poorly. Sakura would change, though; Taiga always wins in the end, after all.
I didn't touch the food I made; looking at it made me feel sick. Taiga became so engrossed in a new thing that Dad whispered to me, "Shirou, come with me." He took me out of the room and back to the silence of the house.
Whirlpool of Fate 2 (Music) /3wXmgL-CuY0
He sat me down at his futon and moved to the point. "Shirou, can you tell me what happened yesterday."
"Hmm, what do you mean? I was at the park and then... and then... I woke up, and I was home."
"You're telling the truth, Shirou? The whole truth?" He held my shoulder hard. "What were you doing at the park with the girl, and why... did you come home with her?" He looked like he wanted to say something but decided against it.
"Well... I had a bad dream, is all. That's all I can remember in between, I swear." I lied through my teeth. I couldn't tell him about Mom, not when I felt like I was drawing close to the time I could bring them together. Mom made me promise... and she was the only one that I would listen to on the same level as Dad.
He fixed his eyes into mine, forcing me to see the suspicion he had. He sighed, "I think... you're telling the truth; I trust you. But doesn't make this any better..." He looked back at the kitchen. "A bad dream? Of the fire? I had thought that had started to stop."
"No- your right, it wasn't the fire, it was uh... different. I can't really explain it." Dreams aren't things that make sense in the real world.
"Try, please." If he insists...
"Well... it was very dark, and I was sad and a bit hungry. So I had a big meal, and I felt a little better."
"...That was the dream?" It was simple to him, but of course, there was so much more to it.
"I was really hungry... and well later... Uhh... I was in a playground: somebody pushed me too hard, and I broke into a thousand pieces."
"Hah, that's enough, Shirou. You're right; dreams are not something that makes sense. You should... forget. Ignore and deny and forget... If only the truth were something, we could live in." He held his hand on my shoulder and looked away. He muttered about some things didn't quite get.
"Are... you okay, Old Man?"
"Haha..." He laughed unhappily. "I don't know Shirou. I am fine. It's just... you're on my side, right?" He looked at me with vulnerable eyes. It was a face that I knew, the face he had those years ago when he took my hand.
"Haha, yes, Dad. I'm always on your side." That's a weird question. Of course, I'm on Kiritsygu's side, and everything I do is for him. after all.
"Thanks, I'm glad. I'm just a fool, don't worry about anything... I'm going to fix this." He smiled. "This is my world, and I need to take responsibility for it."
I couldn't stop him if he felt that way, even if I didn't want to be such a burden. I didn't know what was happening, so I could just let him help, "Alright, Dad, I hope you can fix what the problem is. Just ask for help, and I'll be there."
"Haha, of course, Shirou. You are a good boy." His eyes gleamed, and he had a sad smile. He was on edge, and as soon as breakfast was done, he rushed out into town to do who-knows-what. It's funny: I never did know where Dad made all his money from.
I don't know what he said to Sakura, but she had been reticent here. She blended into the walls and stayed by my side. It was kind of weird but Dad didn't even bat an eye while Sakura stayed over in the guest room.
It seemed that they had made some sort of agreement. Dad made us stay home for th rest of the school week, even at Taiga's complaining. But he just kept saying he didn't want to spread disease to school, except I wasn't sick? And shouldn't Sakura's family be worried?
Ah well, it must be fine. What do I do next?
Go to school and find Shinji.
Go to school and find Shinji.
Go to school and find Shinji.
It would be Monday when I would go to school and find Shinji, I felt that I had something I needed to talk to him about.
Church on the Hill /3DWJIA5VF58
The phone rang for the third time before I picked up. I really didn't want to, but I had to at some point. If only so i could yell at someone.
"What is it!?" I screamed preemptively.
"Haha, what is that tone on you, girl? Your father would-" I prevented his stupid words from going any further.
"Alright, I'm hanging up-"
"Wait, Rin. You may wish to hear what it is I have to say." ...Damn him, but I am curious why he was calling me at a time like this.
"Then get to the point, you verbose old man." However, Kirei, at his worst, is when he is concise on something.
"Then I will: the Matou family is asking for your support in investigating the disappearance of Matou Byakuya." I had already known of it, and this was not o surprising. ...That doesn't mean I had accepted it. To walk the path of a magi is to accept death... but still, I had some apprehension.
"And why are you telling me this and not them? I am the Tohsaka here if I can recall."
"I am your guardian, entrusted to help you." He knew how to make a good sound thing feel horrible.
I felt very uncomfortable, at least this was by phone. "Grr, I will abide by all agreements, of course. And what of you? You're just going to stay out of this?"
"There is no indication of a vampire presence in the area. " It was better this way... much better. I didn't need his eye on my back.
"And, of course, I assumed you would not have wished for interference in this matter. Consider your personal attachment to the matter."
"Shut up, and fine, I will help in accordance to the alliance." My cold anger carried through the phone. If only I could imagine that he would just stop talking once and for all.
I hung up after that, as there was no point to further speech.
He was the worst. These old men who think they know best and preach and preach about this and that because they themselves were too dumb to figure it tout the easy way. Not that I really know many old men. Maybe person would be too kind to describe him, I have never seen a vampire, but I don't think that there would be much of a difference between the two.
Just as I thought that, a knock came on the front door.
'No... it couldn't be...' He just called! I should just activate the defense or something.
"Yes, what is it?" I opened the door and came to find someone... unfamiliar.
"You are the new Tohsaka girl, are you not?" It was... an old man. But compared to the agedness of Kirei, this thing in front of me resembled more a corpse than a man. It almost made me feel bad for calling Kirei old all time, almost. "I only wished to know that your house still kept its customs in mind. You will assist me in investigating this horrible crime?"
I clench my teeth, "Yes." This thing was something I really didn't like.
"It is good that our alliance is intact, is it not?" He smiled, and I didn't like what I saw.
"I will help you." I wanted him to leave now. The house creaked at this person in front of me. I had never been so thankful for this cold house as now.
"Hoho, it seems that I am not welcome any further. I won't take any more of your time then. I am thankful for your support." I looked away, and he disappeared back into the night. That was the first time I met that man, and I hoped it would be the last. Sorry, Sakura... but your grandfather is creepy. I hope she is alright about all this...
I went to work immediately with that feeling. I couldn't just let her... father disappear without a trace.
It was much harder than I thought, though.
I had started looking at this weird disappearance, but nothing had come up. There was literally no evidence of anything happening. Only this strange would feeling I had while searching around. The park especially... why did I feel something there? I was almost close to where that boy would go. The truth was I had found nothing out of sort. Magical murdering almost always is for experimentation, but to do it to another family of magi would be stupid. This would have to be some sort of message killing... but who would do that? Only a magus would have a reason.
There are five magi in this town: Myself, Kirei, Zouken, Kiritsugu, and Shirou. Take away Zouken, and that leaves Kirei, Shirou, and Kiritsugu. ALright, then take away Shirou because he wouldn't hurt a fly, and you have Kirei and Kiritsugu. Both are annoying old men, but Kiritsugu at least doesn't bother me at my home. I couldn't just accuse people without any evidence, though, so I continued.
Two days passed, and another knock came. A phone call, and two knocks: This is the responsibility of eleven-year-old Rin, whose only company is dreadful old men. I had half a mind to go on a killing spree of my own after this is all over.
"What is it!?" I slammed the door open, I was so done with this.
This time it was the third old man, who I could see as the least bad. He was smoking and had a long and worn black coat on, "Is this a bad time?" He stood in the perfect length away from the house defenses. He was very good at this, I realized.
"No... I would have to talk to you anyways. You may come closer." He moved in a stage way, as if there were cameras everywhere and he was keeping out of there sight.
"The Church would not notice me this way."
"Yes, yes. Now, why are you here? To turn yourself in for murder or to give me a tip?" I said it outright to see his reaction.
His face was stone cold and showed nothing. "Neither." He spoke a cold truth. "Though it concerns me, so I felt the need to come here. I wish to complete the agreement." The agreement? What does that have to do with anything?
Annoying, "What does that have to do with this? Hmph, then maybe I should make you investigate it then! I am the second owner here, after all! Maybe then I would give you your freedom." I nodded my head at this fantastic idea.
His teeth clenched, "That... would be your right if you gave the contract, but as you have not, I do not have any responsibility to you. Unless you wish to call off the entire negotiation?" His eyes hardened. He had eyes that rivaled that damn priest. I look away despite myself. I need to be calm and think.
Why do I let emotions control me at the worst times? I... I don't want to lose at this point. Damn my weakness, but I just don't want to lose. I know this is the sunken costs thing, but still... effort should mean reward! And if, after all my efforts to converse with the boy, be friendly with him, and think about him all the time, I deserve something in return! "I do wish to do the agreement," I said almost meekly.
"Then why is it taking so long to present it, if I may ask? I know how to make a Geis myself, shall I do it? I can do it right now-" The man had a desperation to his eyes, but my anxieties didn't let me see that too well.
"No! I...I just..." Why am I so cowardly!? I am Tohsaka Rin. I should just go down to Stupidface's house and tell him he is now my butler! He shouldn't even have the ability to say no! I mean... wait, wasn't I saying I wasn't going to do that... This is his fault somehow. He's using some sort of magic to make me want to make him into my butler, the scales fall from my eyes, and I see the absolute truth. That really is some great conspiracy! As if... "I can do it! T-tomorrow then! I'll be there tomorrow with the contract!"
I had to be the one, so I could conquer my weakness.
His eyes looked down, "Tomorrow... Is it not possible now, or perhaps the day after?" The man looked pained about tomorrow. Why? What was the issue? This is so unreasonable!
"I said: Tomorrow and no other day! You're the one who asked, Baka!" This man really pissed me off. He was like an old version of Shirou. I sure hoped that Shirou wouldn't grow to be like this, then he and I would- bad thoughts! Move on, Rin.
He took some deep breaths then nodded, "Hmph... fine then: Tomorrow. Come early then; if you value your family's name, you will hold to this." He turns back and walks away without looking back. The man disappears surprisingly fast.
"Grrrr... You...! I'll be there, and don't say ill of the Tohsaka name!" I am a failure for letting it come to this. I pull on my long silky hair as I think that I may have made Dad's name look bad. It's... my fault. My inability to confront the source of this weakness. I've changed my mind on it like fifty times, and now I've run-up to the end of the line.
Tomorrow is Tuesday... I will march on the Emiya residence then, and I will make my proclamation. Either I will excise that weakness, or I will incorporate it in the hope I can mold it into some sort of strength. I will have to write two contracts then... One where I own the boy and another where he will be out of my life forever. There is no middle ground in this.
Jeez, what a pain my life is...
I hope she is alright over there; every second that I work hard must be one where she can live well. That is how it should be...
The issue was that he was telling the honest truth... but not the complete truth. I had a good eye for that. So let's assume he was not the killer: Kirei is all that would be left... but that doesn't sit well with me either. Kirei wouldn't do that, it's all too... strange. But I think that maybe I should confront him anyways, to put that to rest. I would do it subtly, early tomorrow, that would be best.
But if it isn't him, then who? There was... another who I refused to think of... But she would have no reason! She is a victim too, in this! And the boy really wouldn't ever do something like that, imagining that would be preposterous! I regret meeting that boy in the first place. If I had the second magic, I would go back to that rainy day I had to take the bus, and I would have fired a hundred Gandrs in Emiya's face. But that is a meaningless thought. The past is not something to obsess over... the future and the present are.
Tomorrow would be my critical day, so I went to sleep early. What will I choose? The only question that I must ask myself here is: what is the future I most want to see with my own eyes?
Stranger (Music) /MhAcoQuGfHg
It was fall, but the sun was out, and the cool breeze from the sea seemed to do more to bring heat than cold. The day was typical.
It was Monday; Tomorrow was my birthday.
It was recess time; I was here to see someone. Sakura was there behind me, quiet and spectating.
"Shinji, is something wrong today? You seem to be not as energetic as usual."
Shinji ground his teeth, "Emiya...!? And Sakura too! Where have you been? My father went missing, and you did too! At the same time!" What horrible news.
"That's horrible, Shinji. " I said. I tried to muster what is known as empathy or compassion, but for some reason... I felt nothing. "But it's not about me and Sakura, tell me about how you feel, Shinji. Tell me about your father." Shiji's eyes shimmered and the topic awkwardly changed. All that matters is what Shinji feels.
"Yes... Father was..." Fear is present in his eyes and heart. "He was..." His eyes closed to stop the tears. Shinji's hands were shaking, and he slammed them through the air in anger, "Stupid!" The teachers saw him, but they gave him space. As of they wanted me to deal with this for them.
"It's alright, Shinji... he's surely in a better place now." I can't look at him straight as I lie. Please don't cry in front of me.
"No... I don't think so..." He spits out viciously. Sakura watched on at her brother blankly, and she grew nervous as Shinji started becoming angry. "Dad and Mom, what was the point of them? They were useless... they didn't even show up as bodies; they just disappeared." I had never heard of his mother before, what had happened to her, I wonder?
"I see..." I never did know what had happened with his mother—another unfortunate victim of this world.
"But don't you get it, Emiya! ...I will be the head of the house. I will have all that power..." He extended his arms out, his eyes far from rationality. "Power you couldn't dream of, Emiya! It's good that you follow me, then! hahaha!" A pitiful and sad laugh came from his lips. "Don't you see, Emiya? I have power now, power!" He rose his voice to escape the contrary truth.
He was a powerless boy. If you have no power, does that make you innocent, though?
Then, a soft sound voiced an opinion, "You... shouldn't say that..." Sakura's voice was absent; she looked at her brother with eyes full of pity.
"Sakura?" He looked at her and scowled. If I didn't know better, I'd say that is a look of disgust... but a brother can't hate a sister,.right?
"Don't talk about things you don't know, Sakura. Why are you even in this family? So be a good girl and keep your mouth shut!" Stomping to drown out the noise that was reality.
He came at her with his fist closed. Sakura flinched but didn't try to evade. ...That was what made me mad. She didn't even try to save herself! But... his hit never came, as I held his hand back.
"Enough of that, Shinji." I would like to believe that he was aiming for the ground or something. I would like to think the best of him. It's just tough to think that. Shinji was being a source of pain to her.
"Don't touch me, Emiya! " He tried kicking and flailing at me, but his attacks were pathetic, and all he accomplished was flailing about, "Let go of me!"
"Alright," I let go, and he continued to flail about correcting his clothes.
"Stay out of it, Emiya! You can't tell me what to do with my family! She's nothing but trash, my property! I am the heir now of the Matou family. If you knew what that meant, then you would be licking my boots!" This crap, again? I was sick of hearing about it.
"Sakura is not trash," I stated simply. I shook my head.
"Haha, what the hell is your problem, Emiya? Do you have a crush on her or something? I didn't know you were into garbage, Emiya." He laughed, and he came to know that bringing pain to others could soften your own pain. No- Shinji had already long since learned that. The only question is if he can still be changed, or is he unforgivable?
"Sakura is not trash," I repeated coldly. This time I narrowed my eyes at him, and he moved back.
What does he see when he looks at me? I only wished to be his friend, I wish to make him happy... but if he himself is a source of evil, then I cannot tolerate it.
"Fine! Why don't you two stay here then? You seem to enjoy being that!" I turned away. I gave him his chance to leave.
But... he didn't take it. He threw a punch at me as soon as he thought he could; I turned and caught it in my hand. "You attacked me, Shinji." My words came out very cold. Why? Why make me see you in a lesser light? I can't pretend to be happy if you don't help me do so.
"Emiya... you..." The anger had suddenly turned to fear. He fell onto his butt and moved back from me.
"Sakura, what should I do?" I will do as she wishes.
"Senpai..." She looked at me with blank eyes, "...let him go." Her voice was breathy into the cold air.
Shinji was already getting up and preparing to run away. "Emiya, I will not forget this...!" He grumbled and stomped off, giving a nasty look at both of us. I worried about what he would do to Sakura alone. A brother should not think to hit a sister. "I'll tell Grandfather!"
I sat back down and tried to calm down. I realize it only now, but Sakura is shaking. Was she so scared that she couldn't calm down? She was standing up for herself, and every moment was one that she felt she was falling towards an inevitable fall.
"...Why?" Her head ticks to a questioning look. She may seem to have regressed to nearly no personality, but this was actually her true self. She was starting from the beginning.
"...Because you're not trash."
She looked at me with a strange expression. ...Was it strange for me not to see her that way? I knew I was right. It was my own sight, after all. But why does everyone else see her that way? "Senpai..."
"Sakura...?" Did she wish to say something?
"...Nevermind."
A while passed, as the cool spring wind passed over our bodies, she moved closer to me unconsciously to warm up. The dead sakura blossoms were still waiting for their time to bloom.
"Nii-san... knows nothing." Her voice was soft in volume but held cold darkness to it. I don't think it was aimed at Shinji, though.
"It's alright, Sakura... Shinji is just sad. What is it you wish to be done?" The words ran hollow. That feeling I had looking at her, like she had invisible scars came back to me.
"He wouldn't last very long in there," a cold chill through my back. She was speaking not to me but to herself. "He would break and never come back."
It was like a cold rain settling on my head.
"Does he cause you pain?" The words hang in the air.
"I am fine..."
"And yet you...?"
"Yes, I want him to understand. I want... him to understand." I see... I did not understand either, so I could not judge her. But I would be lying to myself if I did not see the ugly hate in her.
There was something more there in her, an inkling in her lips.
"Is there something the matter? I am here to help." I say that, yet my greatest fear is that there is something I don't know how to fix.
What she said next, though, was not what I was projecting in my mind. "Your Mother..." She said it, and the air started to freeze. A cold metallic feeling took hold of my spine.
"...Yes?" I asked, a little hesitant.
"Her offer." And she smiled at me, a genuine wide grin. Her eyes moved with it and cast a dark portrait over her face. A violet smile: dark and unreflective. Dark in its desires and unreflective of sanity. "I think I will accept it." Her wish was going to be granted no matter what, but this meant to give herself away truly.
But it was fleeting, for it shrank back into a dull and dead look. She was still not free, and now that hope infected her every pore, pain assailed her more than ever. A promise is a horrible thing, for she had opened the gates to her mind wide open and let it all in with the hope she could still live on regardless.
"So please... just take it all... please..." I could see it now, what she was to herself, and it was horrible—something I couldn't accept. "I trust you... Senpai." She let her walls down willingly, for the first time. She broke and gave herself to me to be reforged. I would do so or die trying, no matter what.
I had looked into Sakura... and I would never be able to look away ever again. For once these eyes become accustomed to a color, they could see anything but that. A part of me agreed it was not right, but I couldn't deny her this; if that is who she is on the inside, then I would never deny that. Words won't cut it here; there is no need for any more of those. It needs to be done in one act, one heroic feat.
'Take the initiative. That's what Kiritsugu would do.'
Into the Night (Music) /j4xsfkhcw-A
And so I do, "Then I will finish it, Sakura. We shall go to your home."
"Senpai... you..." Fear was in her heart, and crushing it with pressure. It was all so fast to her, and emotions were now poisoning her bare heart.
"Come what may, I won't be backing down. Trust me." It all came to me and felt all too simple. Why hadn't I done this from the start? It made me want to stop hesitating.
"...You don't understand at all..." She had a hope to be saved, yet she still lacked the courage to dare be free. She was afraid... for me.
Then she needed a push: a hard one, "...No! I won't leave until I know you've been saved, then I'll stop bothering you! Mom, I think I know now what I need to do. I'm going to do it." Like taking out a thorn, it is painful but necessary. I would remove the sources of her pain and build her back up myself. "Now, we're going!" I took her hand and started running.
First I went home if only to talk to Dad... but strangely he was nowhere to be found. Did he go off on some trip? I didn't know, but even that would not stand in my way. I left the place. I walked without fear closer and closer to the home that was the source of her pain. The closer we got, the louder the bugs were. It was strange, as it was past the season for that. It wasn't really that which made me anxious. Sakura's hand was shaking in mine, but letting go was not something I knew how to do.
There was a hunger in the air. The winds of magic were swirling: signifying a coming whirlpool. I look into her dead eyes, 'Every pain, every source: I will find it and remove it. I swear it.' It's too embarrassing to say out loud, but maybe I did feel almost like a hero thinking that.
There was this feeling in the bottom of my stomach, a yearning to be free. I was afraid of it because it didn't feel like my own; it was a parasitic feeling. I think that... no matter what, tonight, that feeling will be resolved, no matter how that may be.
A scraping voice appeared from behind me, "You are the Emiya boy then. I have heard much about you. You are younger than I thought, but looks can be deceiving, can they not?" The fear of something inhuman was cold, but I could be colder. It doesn't matter where I end up because I am not wrong.'
I turn around and begin the final trial of the Matou family.
Author's notes:
This is the cooldown period before the storm that is the next chapter.
The next chapter is the most important chapter in the entire story so far, and the one after that may be even more important. The story moves pretty fast when the exposition is done. The actual birthday should be the chapter after next. I haven't written much on that yet, but I reckon it will be pure chaos. Not that this chapter isn't important: if you can correctly interpret the start of the chapter then you will basically able to understand the entire story.
I had to have Kiri go and run around so he wouldn't stop Shirou at the last moment. He's not the type who would sit back, even if his body is crap.
Here is the poll I will have up for a long time: The three servants you most want to see? Just the character so the class/alter doesn't matter. Select 3. You can answer in review form or on the poll on FFN, give your reason and maybe I'll be convinced to write one over the other.
As always review and follow: it makes me happy! And if I'm happy I can write faster. Much love to you all.