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I don't own anything related to Fate/stay night; this is a work of parody.
Act Two: Seventh Circle
Church on the hill (Music) /nDDoqAksEn0
Surely there is no more potent resolve than Tohsaka Rin walking up the steps to a church on the hill.
My red boots stick to the moist stone ground, the sky is overcast leaving the tall church as an imposing icon. In this town, western influence is not as rare as the rest of Japan, but still... such a place is unatural.
The oversized doors open into the gloomy church. The virgin mary's likeness seems to watch me as I step into the place I have no love for. It's a creepy place, at its core. I would never see a church as anything but frustrating.
"Kirei! Are you here?." I yell out into the deserted church. The man is there when you don't want him to be, and not when you do — which is almost never.
Clacking steps come from the back of the church. His unnecessary loud steps signal the coming of my least favourite person.
A tall man, wearing the long coat of a priest. But anyone who sees him as a priest has to be an idiot. "Rin, this is a holy place. Unfit for yelling." His hand is already out in his favored stance, that of the droning monologue.
"Then maybe you shouldn't always be hiding in the back of the church. A real priest would make people happy to come here, not make them feel unwelcome." Kirei had a frown, which was definitely a big difference from his usual mocking glare.
"You are more troubled than you are ordinarily. What is it that troubles you?" As if I would want to talk to you about it!
My face scrunched, "You. You are the problem here, I don't know what is happening in my own, town and no one is helping me." I must get to the point. "Did you kill the man?"
"Run, what is it you are asking? I am a man of the cloth: I do not kill unnecessarily. I would not trouble you in that way, for I know that you-"
"Fine, I believe you... forget I said anything." I held my hand out. Perhaps he was telling the truth, I would not really know. I took what he said with care, for he was my teacher — the man Dad left me to. I wanted to think his words could be trusted if only in Father's memory.
"If you are feeling overwhelmed, then it is natural that I would support you. That reflects poorly on me. What is it you wish for me to do then?" Helpful? Maybe I could use him for something good.
"Well, I have something I could have you do. You can do something useful, for once." I unveil a bound scroll. "I want you to bless it with the power of the Church sacraments."
It's a heretical suggestion to bless something like this, "This is a holy house; magic and superstition are not things you can-"
"Just do it." I interrupted him, I was not in the mood to hear his speeches. I don't care if he is breaking the rules of the church by being a magus, that's his issue. I don't have the time for this.
He seemed amused by my annoyance. I loathed this, but he took that with satisfaction. "Hmm, woe is the man who is not generous to a child. I will do that for you. Your Father gave me much, it is my repayment to him to teach you." He took and inscribed divine symbols into it: the church had its own sort of magic that they considered holy. Of course, Kirei knew much more than that and was basically an apostate, not that anyone would care. It was not a complicated sort of Church enchantment, just one that would prevent degradation of the power of the spell. "Never say I am not a generous guardian. It would seem that you have a place to be, I should not stand in your way." His terrible smile make my spine tickle, but I kept my face stern: the face of a magus.
I dare not give away anything to this man.
Emiya-kun once blandly asked me why I was angry a lot. The answer is standing in front of me. Of course, I didn't answer with anything but more anger at Emiya-kun back then. I didn't know that all that time he was like me. After all, who would imagine that an idiot like him could have magic?
I drift back to the present. "I'll pay a tithe in payment. I would rather not be in debt to you."
"Hmph, I would not turn away a generous donation." He chuckles as he knows that the idea that I would owe him anything disgusts me. He's the one who taught me to respect the transactional continuum.
"I'm leaving... Tha... goodbye. " I walk out the heavy doors back to the regular world. Yet it feels as thick out here as it does inside. A humidity like summer, yet little heat. I don't look back and I don't say the thing I almost felt.
I walk with a brisk step towards the bus stop. It's unbecoming of me, but I had to follow the agreement that I would set today. I should be there on time, and not leave Kotomine with any clue of it.
I... respect him as a teacher, but as a person I will never like him. It's dangerous to admit even a little degree of gratitude.
Trespassing 2 /nXnRjzVzB4c
When I arrive back to Miyama, I know that something is dreadfully wrong. Dark portents carry in the wind and the unnatural feeling that magic carries is like a soft shock on my skin. Only two hours passed, yet it is not the world I left it as.
A soft pull started to take us all into a current. But what was this current pulling us into?
I notice it immediately. Police tape covers some homes, and there are people swarming about as if confused. A police man yells out, "Please stay behind this line! There are reporting of gas leaks in this area!" The whispers of the crowd tell me that people have gone missing from their homes. All that remains is a poor smell in the air: one that is like a smoky tar.
"What is... going on?" A gas leak that affected many homes? That's how the humans explain it. I wait stunned with the feeling of magic long enough an older man come to me.
A police officer kneels down to my level, "Are you lost, little girl? Where is your family?"
"..." My throat constricts, so I speak my feelings. My feelings are strong, they can break the hold of reality.
"I'm not a little girl..."
"Of course... but you should be going, where is it you live?" He speaks softly, but that just annoys me more.
"I don't need help! Hmph... I am fine. I'm a grown-up!" I exhale and move away, these people wouldn't understand. I am not a little girl... I am Tohsaka Rin: the second owner of Fuyuki. I should be in control. I stomp away and see many homes with police tape tagging them. The sky is gray, but the ground is even bleaker. There are people crying, and together it creates a cacophony that carries sorrow.
"Hah... kids these days, no respect... Now move along now. Make it home safe." I am ignored and hastened away. The crowd disperses slowly. There was no crimson murder... just nothing. Nothing at all was there, as if a family hadn't been there from the start... Everyone has their heads down, afraid of something. But what?
What could do that? It's obvious: Magic. I had to stop being a little girl, and I had to become a magus. Something like this here? On the land of my family?
I can't abide by this disrespect.
'So do something about it.' The wind says.
I am fix this, first I had to finalize this deal. Then with that, I can use them to help me. That seems to be a sensible idea. Make alliances; divide an conquer. That is reasonable. Nothing... exceeds my grasp.
I don't like to rely on anyone, but if you want to live in my land then you better take responsibility for that. ...I am limited, I will admit it. I could use the support of someone less horrible than Kirei.
I walk west towards the sea; opposite to my house and towards the place I need to be.
An old woman I walk by is crying, and alone. Sometimes the difference between a little girl and an old woman is smaller than a little girl and a teen.
People who can't do anything but cry... those are just humans. They hold no magic in them. They are weak; I am strong.
It ruins my mood. I clench my teeth to the point blood drips from my lips, I would rather be angry than to face whatever this is.
I walk away with a purpose, every stomp that my red boots make on the ground makes me more certain. Confidence that is built on anger, and on other things not worth mentioning.
The air thickens even more, and I hesitate to move forwards. It's as if there is a molasses holding me slowly moving towards the door. It's the thick and sharp feeling of magic. The invisible element of the world. I am coming closer... or is it that I am being pulled too, and don't even realize it?
The door... it's nothing special. The lights are out. The air smells like before, but far worse. This is not the feeling of the trace of magic... no, this is the feeling of magic in action. The source lay beyond. I'm not afraid...
...I hadn't noticed it before, but it's quiet... so very hushed. The bugs are mute. Even the wind is still. Al the sounds of the world are dead. There is not the sound of cars, bikes, or anything human. Perhaps they are there, and they simply don't wish to be noticed... no matter what, they don't want to be found.
'Found... by what?' This is no longer a world for humans. The moonlit world which resides between this world and the one that lay past the horizon.
I stood there on the precipice for a while, waiting. Nothing happened... nothing at all.
As there is no change, one's sense of time disappears. You wouldn't be able to tell the passing of time, as nothing changes to mark it. Even the inside of the body seems to sense it and, in fear, paralyzed itself to seem as dead as the world around it. Perhaps minutes pass, or maybe hours, or maybe not even a single second: I couldn't say.
A normal person would shy away from this tall foreboding door. A normal person would walk home and hide underneath their pillows and whisper to themselves that the world is good, and there are no monsters who stalk the night.
...That's what a normal person would do, or a normal kid. But I am a magus. No matter my age or anything else, I faced the killer that night years ago all alone: I could pull off something like that again.
'You're strong, right, Tohsaka Rin? A door is not hard for you, is it?' Whispers taunted me.
I am Tohsaka Rin — I don't shy in the face of fear. Instead, I face my fears head-on and slap them in the face. 'Why am I even hesitating? All I have to do is go in there and sign a freaking contract, not so hard! What's holding me back?' I get angry at my own fear and impulsively ring the doorbell.
It's funny how acting rashly, without fail, you will have a surge of realization of impending doom. "Haha..." It's funny. The feeling was one In had felt once before, when I approached Shirou in the park and woke him up.
My eyes were closed the whole time, and my silly hands trembled as if drawing close to a fire. When I open my eyes, I find the door open, and I am drawn into an inescapable hollow whirlpool.
The next moments were black. But when I came to, I was inside the hallway where I had slapped Shirou months before.
Nothing was there for me to meet. It was a bit anticlimactic. There was little light within the room. 'Deep breaths... don't be afraid of the dark, Rin. That would be rather pathetic.' This was not ordinary darkness, however.
Tap.
The ground tapped like someone was creaking closer. 'It's just a sound, Rin, don't be afraid of ghosts!' They are real, but they can't just come and hurt you like this! But such thoughts would soon come to a breaking point.
Beyond the dark, something came to the light. The shadows wrapped around a white face. A face that made my heart begin to pulse faster and faster. I did not move... I could not move. It was like a ghost's.
A shock ran up my spine. This...! The woman's eyes were red, and that made my legs tremble. My body was being electrocuted just seeing her. The most unnatural thing that can exist, something alien to sensibility.
I cool my fear and push it into my switch. 'Anfang!' The spell of beginning. That which sparks the magical conduit inside. To turn one's body into a living conduit of energy: this is what distinguishes humans from magi.
But... nothing happened.
Something impossible begets more impossible things: my energy shorted out. A short circuit occurs when the proper path of a circuit is corrupted by something with a lesser resistance. Thus the energy spills out from the right path causing a broken path and catastrophic consequences.
Here... the air itself was so full that my old was spilling out, as if my body and soul had the same weight as the density of the air. Impossible. Such thing was impossible to occur in this age... yet it did, and no magic occurred within me. It was swallowed into the air, draining me of energy entirely.
The woman silently approached me. An albino, paler than a vampire. Slowly her face came closer and closer. Old stories I heard of Onryou — vengeful ghosts that come back from death to take revenge. 'W-what did I do wrong!?' My legs trembled, and I fell on my butt.
I tried to move; I tried to speak; I tried to close my eyes; I tried take deep breathes ; I tried anything. Obviously, none of that happened. I was paralyzed.
She was in no rush to make it to me, leaving only a building panic.
Up all to my face, I came to see her figure. She wore a seamless black dress that looked like it was the hair of a sea monster. It was darker than black and absorbed even that color. There was little difference between her and the shadows themselves.
Her smile filled my vision, and she spoke words that broke me, "Are you here for Shirou's birthday, or for the wedding?"
The tension broke awkwardly. "I-I... huh? Shirou...? wedding..?" My breath was allowed out.
Her face was too close for comfort.
Her smile was not one considered right by human standards. "For the birthday, is it? You are Tohsaka Rin, one of Shirou's besties are you not?" I was quickly taken by her pushing me further with her into the darkness. "You're early! That's amazing; you must care a lot for Shirou then... So you must want to celebrate with us."
"I-I... what...?" It was now obvious that when I opened the door, I gave away all chances of retaining sanity. I had no choice but to be taken along with this woman's mania.
She waved off my confusion, "Come, Rin. Sit and eat! I love new guests!" The woman from hell practically carries me to the mat next to the sitting table. I was not the only one here.
"Oh, I forget my manners! My name is Irisviel Von Einzbern; I'm Shirou's mom, hehe." She held out a peace sign and giggled. Her actions were contradictions, unnaturally going from child-like naivety to manic and bizarre.
Einzbern... It is one I know of well. "Ahhhh... Von... Einzbern...?" The name shot through my brain like a gun. Bringing out all my knowledge at once. Homunculus. Alchemy and the holy grail. It was hot, and I started to melt. The walls were like mud moving as if they were alive.
She treated me like a baby.
"Yes, I remember you too! Tohsaka: such a prideful and good-natured folk. More prone to disaster than Makiri, but with a courage that persevered somehow." This was in a den of a true witch. I had entered without knowing. Here... I was at her whim, we all were. "Oh, is that a gift!?" She takes the scroll from my hands like it's nothing. Irisviel begins reading it, ignoring everything else. The table is not vacant, but it is silent.
The people... I know these people... The first was the older man: Kiritsugu, he looked... broken. He was sweating and his eyes were far away. He sat next to the still reading Irisviel; her hand rested on his.
Ah, I see... or not really. Was she his wife? I had not seen a trace of her existence before now.
Next to her was Emiya-kun... He looked different. Random patches of his vibrant red hair were white now, and on his neck there lay a spot of ashen skin. Like a sunburn gone bad. His eyes were as strained as usual, but among us, he suffered through this heavy climate as if it was tolerable for him.
Shirou had no resemblance to either of the people who introduced themselves as his parents. That fact made me mad for some reason.
An empty space separated Irisviel from Shirou.
Then... Dark blueish hair that existed in only a family touched by magic... It was Matou Shinji. His eyes were completely vacant; he breathed but it could be said that nothing was there other than that. Out of all of those here, he was the only one who had truly become lost. The rest of us stayed afloat, if barely.
And next to him... The last one... was the one I tried and failed to blot out in my mind. To my right was her. She was next to me but I pretended that was not the case.
The order was Kiritsugu, Von Einzbern, empty spot, Emiya-kun, me, Her, Matou-kun and then another empty spot.
I'm sitting next to... a girl. A girl with violet hair, except white strands can be found there like with Emiya-kun's. It's less messy with her... I. focus. on. the. hair. If I just look at the hair, then I won't have to think about anything else. It's pretty hair, not as well kept as my own, and there is a definite lack of the care that I put into my own every morning. Her skin was beautiful too, if pale.
"T-tohsaka-senpai? Y-you look pale... are you okay?" She stammers nervously, and speaks as if we do not know one another.
But pretenses and illusions have been all cut away in this place.
"Sakura-" Maybe I would have said something more. I can not say. It was just an short impulse.
In that moment Irisviel finished reading, and took that opportunity away. "This contract is interesting. If Shirou agrees to your special clause then I have no issues with it. I would not go against my dear husband's hard work... But if you simply swear to protect our privacy with all that you have, then I would offer you something extra as a gift." Her smile was devilish with an offer.
"Gift? What sort of gift..?" The Von Einzbern had much secret magics, what would be offered. Maybe she was reasonable past her insane exterior.
She tapped her chin. "Nothing that special... Hmm, I guess I could show you who killed your father." Her words... huh?
"..." W..h..a..t...? "What...?" My voice cracked.
Food appeared on our plates as Shirou brought it out without even being noticed. No one ate, though. All attention was directed at me. Sakura didn't seem to care for what was said..
"I will show you how Tohsaka Tokiomi really died, if you simply promise that you will protect my secrecy." Died, killed... I... knew that, but she was saying she could tell me who and what. Tohsaka Rin would never be able to say no to that.
I accepted it without thinking hard. The air dulled my mind. "The truth... I want the truth." My head was already fuzzy as I came to something strange. This was madness, and I was trying to negotiate with it. That was my first mistake. "Show me." I am strong. I can handle it. I let the black lunacy seep into me.
She smiled at my resolve as if she knew what would happen. What did she see that I didn't?
The world morphed and the place changed. It was now night.
Whirlpool of Fate 2 (Music) /3wXmgL-CuY0
We were standing now, and it was me, Shirou and Sakura. Shirou was there holding my hand, and Sakura was sitting down with her dress on the ground. I was too caught up in the moment to care about the hand. I swear I would have push it away then...
It was a familiar place.
It was my house. It was my father's studyroom, a place I hated. I never felt good in there. I did not yet deserve to use it.
Tall and black-haired, a gentle and good man who was strong. He was in my eyes invincible even now.
'And Daddy... he was there! Right there!' "D-daddy...!" I said despite myself. My childish self came out.
A voice ruins that childish delusion of some revival. "It's only an illusion of the past." The white woman explained as she watched with me. She was behind us, I noticed.
But strangely, I didn't care; she was good at just watching without being noticed. "I... know that." And yet, I reached out anyway.
Suddenly time started to move, and a voice I would never forget starts to talk.
"The more I think about your leaving, the more reluctant I feel. Whatever may happen, I hope you can succeed your father Risei's last behest and continue to assist the Tohsaka family in fulfilling a wish we have always desired..." The room was less dusty than it was now. "Though it is a pity your actions against the Einzbern family failed, I understand that you had good intentions. Perhaps this is the way that Executors work, but I hope you will duly inform me of the situation before and after you act in the future. Then I can be prepared." Einzbern... was she the one? Did she take revenge here?
But Kirei never said anything as to what had happened. He was supposed to have been gone, I thought.
I saw him then... younger than now, standing straight up. Kotomine Kirei. My stomach knotted. Dad's magnanimous attitude made Kirei lower his head further.
"To have given you, my teacher, this much trouble at the last moment... I am truly ashamed." Kirei raised his head, seeing the sincerity in Tokiomi's eyes, and said to himself.
"It is true that we met only because of the Heaven's Feel, but no matter what the circumstances, I am very proud to have had you as a disciple."
Kirei made a laugh, as if it was humourous. Dad continued without thinking too hard. "Talent is not something to be taken by force of will, but your sincere attitude towards training as one who walks this path is something that even I, your teacher, am very much impressed with. Kirei, from this day on, you can continue to fight for the best interests of the Tohsaka family as your father did before you. What do you say?"
"I could not wish for more."
Kirei smiled slightly and nodded. Tokiomi, who for the past three years had constantly misunderstood his disciple's character and inner world, now also misunderstood the meaning of Kirei's smile. And so he continued to speak even more happily.
"You allow me to rest assured. I wish for my daughter to learn from you. After this Heaven's Feel ends, Kirei, you shall be Rin's master, and guide her as such." Then Dad retrieved a letter that had previously been placed at a corner of the desk and passed it to Kirei.
"... Teacher, what is this?"
"Though it is written rather simply, it can perhaps be considered a will of sorts." Dad smiled. "If—and the chances are very small but a possibility nonetheless—if something unexpected happens to me, then I have written here that the Tohsaka household shall be inherited by Rin and you will be her guardian until she is mature. Pass this letter to the Clock Tower, and all further procedures will naturally be taken care of by the Association."
This time, Kirei did not stop at perfunctory verbal assent but seemed to sincerely accepted the responsibility of caring for me. After all, Kirei was of the priesthood. It was his duty to fulfill the responsibilities entrusted to him with honesty and reliability.
'Such a scene... I... don't know... was Father right? Do I take Kirei, for as insufferable as he is, with not enough credit?' He is the man that Father chose here. The vision was so genuine, just as I recall him.
I accepted its validity into my heart without thinking of the consequences.
"Please trust me. Even though your disciple's abilities are limited, I will make every effort to take up the responsibility of caring for your daughter."
"Thank you, Kirei." Though the words were brief, they contained a deep gratitude. Next, Dad picked up the thin, long black box that had been beside the letter and handed it to Kirei.
Unconsciously my hand sought out another's. My heart was pulsing now, a fear and anxiety that I had buried deep was coming out. Dad didn't come home. What... happened? What am I about to see?
Dad seemed to answer me, "Open it and see. This is my personal gift to you."
Kirei opened the box. On the velvet-lined interior neatly lay an exquisite dagger.
"This is—"
"The Azoth dagger. It has been meticulously crafted from heirloom jewels. After it is filled with prana, it can be used as a Mystic Code. You have learned and practiced the ways of the Tohsaka magecraft; use this as the proof of your graduation." That blade...
"..." Kirei held the dagger in his hand and examined it carefully. His gaze fell upon the sharp knife-edge and for a long time did not move away.
Kirei's face, devoid of expression, made my heart pulse. I knew the look as one I never liked. The knife... that was held hidden in my boots... I tended to keep it close to me and today was no different. Kirei gave me that knife near Father's grave.
"My benefactor... I will truly never be able to repay your great care or live up to your expectations."
"To me, you are the best reward, Kotomine Kirei. With this, I can set forth for the final, decisive battle with no regrets." Daddy said with a clear smile, then got up from the sofa. I was caught up in his look then, his unwavering belief in his path and correctness. It was that strength that was in my own blood too. Daddy was right... he never made mistakes or misteps... Never... Not once...
Kirei held the dagger in his hands and looked at it with a humourous look. To give such a thing, at that moment... It's just not right. I refuse it. I deny what is arising in front of my own eyes.
My heart pulsed, and blood pooled in my head. I felt light, and my legs started to give out. Someone silently held me up. "Watch, girl. This is my favorite part." A voice speaks into my ear as if this is just a movie.
"I am truly sorry to have delayed you for so long. Will you still be in time for your flight-" Now Daddy was facing the direction of the guestroom exit, lost in thought. He always thought hard about everything.
"No, you do not need to worry, teacher." Every word Kirei has ever said to me started to echo in my head. Kirei began to laugh loudly, a laugh more cheerful than I thought possibly from him. "There was never a flight to begin with."
"... Ah?" My eyes were peeled open and denied the escape of closing.
The Azoth dagger that had been a proof of love and trust slipped between ribs to directly pierce Daddy's heart. One strike by an Executor who had experienced countless battles could be said to be deathly precise. There was no intention of murder, and there was no sign of it. Just a inscrutable scene that neither I or father acknowledged.
Daddy staggered forward. Turning his head, he saw only Kirei, smiling brightly, his hands stained with fresh blood—but there was never the slightest indication of understanding in his eyes even till the end. With only a dazed expression, devoid of anger, he collapsed onto the carpet. Not letting go of his conviction until it too drained from his body.
I collapsed too as if I had been the one stabbed; I was caught in someone's arms. My stomach knotted. Acid pooled in my throat. My body tensed, and blood compressed, liquids poured from my face. And yet still, my eyes could not shut.
A sparkling aura suddenly surged beside Daddy's rapidly cooling corpse. Shining with radiant light, A man in gold materialized in front of Kirei. "Hmm, what a disappointing ending." A condescending expression emitted out of those red pupils. He nudged Daddy on the ground with his foot. "I was anticipating he would make a last retaliation before death. Look at his expression. Completely at a loss. He was not aware of his own stupidity even till the end."
The scream of a little girl could be heard that shattered time like a broken mirror.
Crack.
Tohsaka Rin — the magus — cracked and broke. She was not strong enough to take it, and thus only Tohsaka Rin — the little girl — remained. "Nooooo! No more, please!" I fought with the hands that held me up, I needed to run. "Let go of me!" I need to go! Need air! Panic was all that remained.
The boy that held me did so even as I hit him hard with no regards to anyone but myself. I just needed to escape; I needed air to breath; I needed to find and kill. I needed to escape.
Nothing but an animal being restrained. The demon that all humans hold inside themselves took hold. She moves her hands around and the scene shatters.
I can not believe I didn't know. I can not believe I almost thanked him. My fist tighten. I continue to fight this prison of hands that hold me. I kick and push and elbow. I take out all my hatred on the boy in front of me, for that was all that was available.
The woman pats my back as tears poured uncontrollably from my eyes. "Now now, I know it's hard to see. The truth is ugly, but you said you wanted to see it. We haven't even gotten to the other pieces yet too." She was still smiling and laughing. But I didn't hate her. All my hatred was reserved for someone else; I was just a monster in that moment. An odd colour brought back some measure of sanity to me. Even in this state, I saw it and stopped. That colour was purple. Irisviel stood behind Sakura. The white woman played Sakura's hair and smiled at me. "As I said, Tohsaka Rin. There is still some truth you may wish to see." Sakura looked at Daddy's body with a soft smile that tugged at my heart.
"What...?" More...?
"Let me show you." Sakura held her hand out hesitantly, and the world changed with her hands. Daddy disappeared. Kirei and the golden man evaporated. It all becomes hollow then inverts.
A new world fills the hollowness. A wet stone basement. Disgusting at a glance. It was sweet smelling, like honey. And in down the stairs... It cold and wet...
A place that humans don't reside.
And yet, once more... I am not allowed to close my eyes to it. Sakura lay naked on the dark, wet stone ground. "Nee-san...? You never came." A swarm of worms swallows her alive.
It was just the start of some more of this horribleness. No. I would not take that on. I refuse. I've cried enough now. I... could not allow this into me. Just... No more... More...
My head broke itself and ignored the world in front of me. Bad memories murder themselves to save the rest. "No, no, no, noooo! I refuse it. I don't care anymore. Just stop... Make it go away.'" I broke. Shirou still held me up, and I cried a little into him. I sought to hide with him; I didn't want to be alone in this act of cowardice.
Worthless. So so despicable. I am pathetic. I let go of something else to save myself.
She brushed the head of Sakura almost lovingly. "Oh? don't care? Hahahahahaha! Fine by me. I was just giving you what you wanted. If truth is not that, then let us stop." The world disappeared, and I found myself once more in the kitchen of the Emiya family. "Know that I will not bring this offer again. Do you wish for the past to be shrouded in mystery? Would a real magus willfully accept ignorance?"
No, no, I don't care... I just want it to stop. "Just... No more..."
"Hah, As you wish." The world once again went back to the beginning.
My hell had ended, but it's echo followed me into reality. I didn't forget Dad's eyes as Kirei stabbed him. Eyes of betrayal and surprise... Betrayal. Who betrayed who?
We were back at the table now. But the red meat that was displayed before me just made lose my stomach.
I threw up onto Sakura's dress in front of me. My wheeziness pulled me in all directions. I didn't get lost only by the hands that continued to hold me even now. "Ughhhhhh..." I threw up some more, and eventually it was Shirou being hit rather than Sakura. He took her place willingly. Stupidly not even using any cloth or towel, but his own shirt to take it. Idiot.
The fact that he was an idiot was the highest functioning thought I had. I clung to it just as much as I shamelessly clung to him.
A paper was on the ground... it was the contract. That used to matter, but it means little now. I don't remember what was on it, but I want it. I had a feeling of panic and desperately signed my name to it. A moment of desperate weakness leaning into someone else to protect me. The contract would do something like that, I knew I was signing my life to someone else in a way. I didn't care. "I have signed..." I'm tired now. Ready to sleep forever.
The cold eyes of my teacher wound me. Sorrow ails me as memories flash back through me of all the times he taunted me with his knowledge.'You...'
H-he taught me despite being the killer, all that time, he was an unforgivable evil. I dry heave in Shirou's lap. It was all one big insult. An extended cruelty, all I could do to fix this is cover all the memories with his blood.
My brain was a melting pot of emotion.
"Emi...ya..." My head cracked. Maybe if I was older, I would have been able to move on, but I was not old. It had been less than four years all alone. I was hiding these emotions, letting them simmer, and wishing I could work them off. But that was not to be, as this brought me all the way back to the beginning.
The boy talks. He has a bloody nose as I elbowed it hard earlier. "Tohsaka..." Did he pity me? He watched it too, even as it was not his business. He watched it and intervened in my act. He undoubtedly saved me from something worse at his own expense with now reward at all. Idiot. You should not stop me.
Voices far away from talk, "Will you sign it, son? Are you aware of what she has written for you? It is your choice to make; I will watch."
"... I will do it. She needs me." A hand took the paper and signed.
"Huh, then be careful. This one has much anger in her heart; do not let her make you into her punching bag, lest she becomes addicted to the taste of hurting you to keep herself from falling apart."
The contract bursts into flames and turns to ash, its magic taking form in the mana of the air. Its rule become law and a spell like a weak Geis wraps over the hearts of the signed parties. I was already in the realm of sleep by then: all that remained was a strange fever dream of a black wedding.
Tohsaka Rin is a poor magus, and she was exposed today. An older Tohsaka would had learned her lessons would have persevered and moved on. But I am not that Tohsaka, I had only really just started this journey in magic...
So... the best thing to do sometimes when you hit a horrible obstacle early on... is not to persevere and push through, but rather to start again from the beginning.
And that is what I will do, I will start again and move into the future stronger for it. Tohsaka Rin was not defeated this day, for she would rebuild into a greater and better magic and person. One that would never be duped again.
It was an awkward dinner. The day had already been long.
Wordlessly cooking, cleaning, and eating. I cleaned up myself and Tohsaka from... you know. It was best left in the past. Mom said that she read that kids throw up at birthday parties all the time.
In terms of who was lucid, that was hard to explain. I was awake entirely. Mom was energetic. Dad was languid but moved still. Sakura pretended to be a doll, but was having issues with that. It was almost as if
Rin was sleeping on my shoulder. Strangely, I had an impulse to let her do that. Shinji, too slept... there was nothing under those eyes of his. Did I hurt him too much? But punishment must fit the crime. Sakura did not break from a hundred times the pain he was given, but he fell apart fairly quickly.
"Now, let me start my initial thanks this evening. Well, we're not going to thank God... Oh! let's thank humanity for their wishes have brought me here today in celebration!" I alone clapped.
"Thanks, son. Now let me talk about a difficult topic, here." She pointed at Shinji. "What a wicked boy he is, and yet we must forgive. Humanity is born into sin, so a sinner is not something that is anything unnatural. Thus, we must give him a chance, right Sakura? Or maybe we should just kill him, hehe."
She was placed as the center of attention, "Er... Yes. Nii-san... H-he can, maybe... change."
"Is that so? He is only a child, but once rotten, can a fruit go back to being ripe? Or did he not become unforgivable just yet? Hehe, All humans have some capacity for good, so it would be wrong to take away his choice." Mom swirled her hands, and the miasma that plagued Shinji ceased. All the pain that I had casted him to feel was just a reflection of Sakura's. Mom healed that with a scar in his mind, one that would close but always remind him of this. Hopefully, that would be good for him. "Now, the actually important topic..." She motioned to look at the spot that was between her and me. "Our daughter is not here. And I don't like it! I want her now! This spot is her reserved seating!" She pouted her cheeks out and declared her annoyance. "She is my honorary bridesmaid, even if she's not here."
All this... I did this. All of it was to bring Onee-san here so Dad would be happy. I will admit to becoming sidetracked, but it was only the first day. We couldn't just run to Europe immediately.
"Iri..." Dad tried to make some plea.
Mom answered, knowing him well enough that without having to speak, she would know.
"I know that it was hard for you. But now, with me, that's no issue is it? She will be here. I promise you that. Every obstacle to this family will be burned away." Her promise was red; just as red as her eyes.
My secret from Dad was right, Mom was the only one who could talk to him right. She knew best.
It was a good moment that set an objective that even Dad gave in to without a fight. I know Mom told me that he would have issues accepting her return, but I didn't know it was that bad. It was fine... Dad had come to see the reality that Mom illustrated.
Just like Tohsaka, I would focus on the future, not the past. I wondered who the other spot between Shinji and Dad was for. Who else was there to come? It was a calm that I think mat have even let Mom grow tempered. She had a gentle side that can not yet be see with all this excitement.
But... all good moments meet their end... A certain cat broke in at that moment.
A sound broke through the world Mom had crafted. A bell then a yell. "I'm here!" An energetic yell broke through the house. Even Mom seemed to still in surprise. Into the kitchen came a spinning Fuji-nee holding a wrapped present. "Sorry it took me so long! It's just me, because I couldn't find Otoko. But you know I was running here to celebrate the foo- I mean, your birthday, but then guess what!? All those people who went missing in the morning suddenly reappeared out of nowhere!? Isn't that funny? I think it was a big stupid prank!" Her stream of consciousness took over the table as jumped into the spot next to me: the one that Mom had earlier marked as Ilya's. "Oh, I'm sooooo happy to be here, Shirou! You know Onee-chan wouldn't miss this for the world!? I'm hungry! " She hugged me tightly. She was sweaty, as it seems that she really did run here. Her sweat left Mom's pristine custom-made sitting sheet soggy.
Dad had his hand's hiding his face. Sakura had a anxious look. Shinji seemed to be just rousing himself awake. Rin treated it all like a nightmare. I watched passively, waiting for my time.
And Mom...?
Her face could be described as absolutely murderous as she rose behind Taiga and held her steak knife up high. Only by Dad suddenly holding her arm and pulling it slowly down was he able to save the oblivious Taiga.
Taiga didn't even notice all that. As she hugged me, she also stole the food from my plate and ate. Her ability to omit the things she didn't want to see never ceased to amaze me. Fuji-nee had powers that rivalled Mom's in some strange ways. She broke the thick veil holding us without even knowing it was there.
By the time it sorted itself out, Fuji-nee had her own plate and was still in Ilya's spot. Dad wrangled Mom back to the ground but by the time he made it back to sitting, his face and neck had red spots all over them. Mom used the struggle to steal kisses. It was an all together embarrassing moment for everyone. Well... except Fuji-nee, of course. She unabashed swallowed my food ravenously.
Eventually, Dad was able to put her back down and calm enough not to immediately kill.
"Now, explain to me, my love, what is this... thing?" Mom's eyes carried a look of jealousy and unbound hostility.
Kiritsugu's voice was out of breath, but his skills were enough to know that this situation was tense, "This is Fujimura Taiga... Shirou's, uhh... babysitter, and my student."
"Oh, c'mon, Emiya-san! You know I'm Shirou's Onee-chan!" Taiga exclaimed between bites, not even noticing that there was any more people than the usual three. Her self-denial would break soon: it was only a question of how ugly it would be when it did.
Dad grunted in pain as Taiga dug her own grave. Mom was barely being held back by Dad's hand on her's. Mom's teeth clenched, "Onee-chan...!? Shirou only has one. You..." Mom whispered in a moment of broken senses. Her anger was so great that her voice could come not out.
"Huh? What was that?" Taiga heard the whisper, but she didn't catch the screaming? That's Fuji-nee, alright.
"Shirou has only one Onee-chan!" The yell echoed through the house and through Taiga's brain. It was the shriek of the banshee, or more accurately, a mother who feels that her family is under attack. "Not only do you wish to steal Shirou from his rightful family, but you're trying to seduce Kiri as well!? Harlot, whore, homewrecker! Unforgivable!" The insane screeching broke the enchantment holding everyone down.
"Uwa, uwa...?" Taiga's face full of food paled quickly as Mom's shadow rose across the room. No light reaches Fuji-nee. All the evils of the world hit Fuji-nee as a flood of hate swallowing her. It was that which burned human reason, and made them eat themselves.
Sakura's hatred of conflict made her shake with nerves.
There was a foregone conclusion here, and it was not what Mom may have expected.
"Huh?" Fuji-nee fell asleep peacefully on my legs; she didn't look too bad considering the attack. She had lived, but I had moved to save her too, sneakily. The curse flowed off my arm like water on metal.
"What... the fuck? She didn't die? She wasn't turned to bones and ash from all that?" Mom did not like this. Her eyes were even more pissed. She felt embarrassed and ashamed to look weak in from of Dad. This was a total disaster as to let a possible rival live.
"Iri... please..." Dad seemed weak in his attempts, as if he was about to fall asleep.
So I intervened in his place, "Mom... Fuji-nee is... special. She's been coming over, just like I told you to help out when Dad wasn't around. She really is a good person. You don't have to worry about her, let me deal with it."
She nodded her head in sudden comprehension. I felt good now, surely she understood completely now. "I see... I see... Oh, I knew it wasn't your fault husband! I didn't lose faith for a second!" She eyed the now unconscious Fuji-nee with an evil eye. "A high school student? A babysitter? How did I not see this coming! it's the ultimate snare. I know your scheme girl, I read plenty of books detailing the evil acts of babysitters in my time. Hah, it couldn't have been helped then. It was the evil powers of this homewrecker who tried to turn you against me!? It's only natural then..." Mom came close to Dad and inspected his eyes for lies. "You fought the hardest you could, right, right?"
"...Iri..." Dad turned his head down. "It's not at all like what you are thinking... She's just a student... There was nothing. I swear..."
Mom did not seem pleased, "No excuses! I saw you look at her! You should only look at me! Me, me and me and only me for all time! Cheating comes in many more forms than just sexual you know!? Emotional cheating hurts too, you can't think that you can get away with it do you?"
"Yes, of course... sorry. I won't look at her, just... please.." He whimpered. It was a peculiar scene. I had no clue that love was so... I don't know, violent and possessive. It made sense though, for love is the strongest emotion and violence and possessiveness are strong human qualities. I see... I underlined that down in my head. Just like friendship, I was really becoming good with this love stuff too.
"Good, I forgive you of course!" She kissed him deeply. He received it. "I'll have to purify you deeply later, hehe."
A word stuck out to me as unknown. Sexual? What is that word really? I've heard it before, but I don't really know what it is. "Mom, what is sex-ual?" I worded out innocently.
"Haha, good question Shirou! Sex is how humans make more humans. You see when a man take a wo-" Dad pulled her back close to him. My cheeks were very red, and I felt uncomfortable. Is all this kissing normal? Why hadn't I ever seen it like this before?
Dad cringed and let go, conveys some message. "Iri... please, he's just a kid.."
She pouted. "Fiiiineee. Shirou, when you kiss someone you love, you make them happy. That's sex." The only ones who were listening was me and Sakura. Sakura had dark deep eyes looking off in her own world to escape. She was not comfortable.
"Oh, ok." Kissing makes babies!? That actually explains a lot! Had I ever kissed someone? I don't recall. It's not allowed for me anyway: why would I want to bring a child into this world?
And yet, kissing makes people who are sad... happier? But Dad seemed to be becoming more unhappy. It must be me who is wrong about it. He is very happy with Mom now.
"Let's move on to better topics, we all know magic here right? C'mon, kids, put your hands up." We all put our hands up, some less enthusiastically than others.
We all hesitantly put our hands up. Sakura pushed Shinji's hands down and after a moment he accepted it. I think he realized it was actually better not to have magic in that moment, and forevermore he would probably understand magic lead to nothing but pain.
"You are my students henceforth. My disciples, of whom came to witness the birthday of Shirou and the unbreakable marriage of Irisviel and Kiritsugu." My birthday ended with that, but the wedding was still to come. "You will come to know that I am an understanding mistress; I love you all, and I forgive you all. All of your goals will become open to you under my generous tutelage."
Dad and Mom left the room to prepare alone.
Broken Night (Music) /lY0O92oJpz0
We were alone in my room. Clothes was already waiting for me there, and for her too. I had no choice but to dress up as if for marriage...
She spoke more gently with me in private now. She as fragile in a way. Obsessed that it would not fail. I looked her in the eye and listened. "I thought that maybe my own wish was the only one that I could never bring about." She sounded dreamy. " Ahhh, Hate me, doubt my intentions... I can forgive you for anything. But don't doubt that I love you... more than anything in the world. I came back for you... and for our children, who are the product of our love."
"I don't hate you." I... have conflicted feeling, to be sure. But the blame does not fall on her.
"You... don't?" A sense of vulnerability came to her face.
"I am... the horrible one. What I did... I cheated on you. Maiya... I was..." A sour black fact came from me. I was with Maiya. I betrayed everything at one point or another. "I brought you here... And I couldn't protect you..."
"I forgive you." She confessed instantly.
"...How can you...?" She was so insane earlier at the smallest hint.
"Kiri, All of the evils: I absolve you of them. They weren't your fault." She moved close and... again; she kissed me deeply. Her entire body pushed to make her tongue in my mouth. It was wet, yes, it was weird, yes, but it was a messy and complicated love in the first place. "Kiri... I love you. No matter what you do or have done, that will never ever change." I peered deep in her eyes and... maybe... I did see a shade of familiar red, "But... that said, cheat on me again, and you will find that harlot's head on a pike, hehe. Even a girl I liked like Maiya..." An almost cute jealous look betrayed her anger.
"Yes... sorry...' I was never interested in romance anyways. It was just... my betrayal readying itself. I wish Maiya had reached a better end.
Irisviel...
Was love something that I actually felt? Imposter: Me and you both.
Her word has always felt genuine to me, even with the evil in her now. Even when she cursed me to die, I never felt that she had lied about what was to happen. I can't say who or what she is, whether she is a demon in disguise or not. This will never be alright, but... I can't deny the faith I wanted dear to have that miracles could come true. She became Impatient as I gazed at her for a while, "Now come on, are we going to have sex or not!?" She practically threw herself on top of me. "Sex before the wedding, it's a classic!"
Her body was pushing all the wrong — or right places. "Iri... that is... I can't..." I tried to eke out as she shook me. This wasn't the first time this had happened, but that was at the start of our relationship long ago. She was... instinctual, and sought me out without reservation like an animal.
Her eyes went wide and sad, "What!? Am I not pretty enough!?" Her franticness was accompanied by her shaking my chest. "Damn it, Shirou..." She muttered hatefully.
I needed to establish some barriers, both for myself and for the whole world. I need to keep this woman happy enough not to go off and kill people, while not giving her too much of what she wants lest she gets bored. I... am not ready for this at all.
Essentially... I'm stuck with her. Would she actually accept my judgment as she claims? Or would just force me to be her toy? "No, I am just... not ready for that..." This woman was... something I couldn't understand or trust. I know that but my emotions betray me. I do feel... a real attraction; my body remembers her touch like it was yesterday.
This is my wife, which is magically bound to me and me to her... but I can not get over that horrible feeling in my heart. But strangely she calms down.
"I... see, that is..." Her breaths were short and rapid. "True, I need time too. I am too excited... and well, when I am excited I tend to kill accidentally, hehe! I'm just like you now!" She was... telling the truth.
"..." But I don't think that was something to giggle about...
She explained loudly to herself, "Yes... this is better, for I will make a perfect circumstance for him. He won't deny me a second time... He will beg me, hehehehehe..." Her eyes were dazed.
'I can hear you, you know.' Yet I doubt she cares.
"I love you, though. Is it so bad I don't want to share? Don't you love me?" But a tenderness exists in those words... one I had struggled to forget. 'I love Irisviel.' That was something I wished to betray, as fuel for my dream. I love you as much as the day I lost you.
"I do... love you." It was true to a part of me.
But that coexists with the twisting of the knife in my heart, the ugliness: the suspicion that kills. That this was not her at all: a demon to be eliminated.
I am unsure what to believe, or what to do. We are both beholden to twin natures. As much as I would like to cut away from all of this, I would also like to bind us together and never let go.
...What internal struggle does she have? If any, what does she want? What is her true purpose here?
She has given me her offer, something impossible to deny. It was only fair she has her dream now, when I had my chance before. My dream was unavailable for me, but was hers impossible?
The decision is obvious then... it probably was to everyone else for a long, long time. I was just too clueless to see it. Accept insanity. Can I do that? Can I really abandon the dark world I have lived in and make my own, as she tells me? To hold a miracle close and never let go.
...I want to. I want to hold something for a time, all the things that I never had a chance to have. Hope? Do I see that?
'Is this fine?' I ask the spectres of the past, yet they draw away, leaving me all alone. Either they abandon me to my fate, or they are blessing me to move on from them.
The doorbell rang to the final guest that she had personally invited. It was when I saw who it was that my stomach dropped.
Mom returned manic to clean up after the doorbell rang. We were still sitting, not there was a choice...
Both Fuji-nee and Rin were using me as pillows. Sakura had an odd look of jealousy that I didn't get. Did she want to sleep too?
Mom ran in and complained.
"No one's taking this seriously!" Mom's hands were straight down and she yelled into the small room. She was fairly close to having a mental breakdown. "This is a wedding and Shirou's birthday! Stand up and clap! And presents, where are the gifts!?" Mom hated stinginess.
"Iri... nobody even knew about this... It is..." Dad was in a suit trying to calm her. He looked a little better than earlier
Mom was throwing what is known as a tantrum, "Well, they should have known! They should have just known that we are meant for each other! I don't like it!"
"People... aren't like that." Dad tried to negotiate with her.
"Don't tell me about humans! No one knows humans as I do!" It is impossible to reason with her on this. Reason was thrown out the window, then it was crushed under Iri's foot.
"..." Dad didn't fight back anymore as much as he just tried to extend his hands out to her. Only a truly great human would be able to keep to her pace. It's best to calm her with actions rather than words.
The doorbell rang again, cutting if all off once again. 'Who...?'
"Oh, he's here." Her eyes dropped down. "Well, at least we could use him for something." Her hand extended towards the door, and the great black thread extended out and took all that remained outside.
Through the door came a man carried by a flowing black thread to his heart that pulled him forward. He fell to his knees before Mom and spit out blood from his mouth. He wore the clothes of a religious person, and had a symmetrical face with a tough body. He was very familiar, as if I had just saw him but younger. Strange... Some old words from Rin shot through my head, something about a dislike for priests she had. "There! We have an ordained priest here with us now. Who else to witness my return than the one who brought about both my end and my rebirth!" Before he could speak, the black threads pushed him down. "Now, now. Stay quiet down there, how does it feel? To be on the other side of it? Not so fun when you are the one who's life is in another's evil hand, is it?"
Her hatred was... cold. Calculated. Nothing of the pure passion of earlier; this was ruthless and held no openings.
In from the door, another walked fearlessly into this home.
A tall blond foreigner who had similar reddish eyes like mom. But where Mom could be said to be unreflective to light, this man shined and was hard to look at even in a dark day like today.
He declared like he must be listened to, "Hmph, I am here to watch this freak show. In my time, couples would kiss my feet to ask for my blessing. But a circus like this would have never been allowed." A mocking voice came.
"An uninvited guest, is it?" She witnessed him. "Oh, it's you.." Her voice dropped cold. "What do you wish for, Golden King? Only well-wishers are welcomed to my wedding." She glared at him. He gave off a degree of... power. Like Mom's but... more, much much more. Mom swallowed power, while he... gave it off like an aura of vigor.
"You are being intrusive to my time here. A mongrel does not have that right. I had thought to ignore it, but I happen to have an interest in that man you are pushing under your boot."
"Hahaha!" She laughed hysterically but then her face turned cold. "Don't push your luck, King. Know that what God giveth, he can also taketh away. Perhaps in your times, you wrestled the gods, but here, you exist under my blessing. You may watch, but do not intervene. Go and feed on children for all I care but do not bother me. I will leave just enough entertainment for you in offering."
It was the sharpest and most severe I had ever seen her. I wouldn't have been surprised to see something incredible then, but it was not to be.
They held each other off with their eyes alone.
The man in gold did not back down, but he did walk away. He did spoke again first. "Hmph, you are entertaining enough. Fine, you have my blessing to exist, you mongrels. But remember that this occurs only because I allow it to." He waved his hand and walked off as if he had become immediately disinterested. His dignity intact, for the man was nothing, if not prideful. The most pride I had ever seen in a man.
As soon as he left, the air regained its warmth and Mom reverted back to being a manic party organiser. "Now, Shirou's birthday has been excellent! All that remains is the wedding!" She held her hands out into the air, and the world collapsed until a church was all that remained.
Unravelled, the priest was brought out to be the officiant.
"Kotomine... Kirei..." Dad came terms to it. Mom was now the one holding him back.
"Come now, Kiri. Let's be forgiving. It's not like he killed me or anything."
"You are..." Kirei went to question her but he was immediately strangled by an invisible force.
"No talking, you will give the wedding and that's it. Unless you wish to die, you don't do you? You want to know, don't you? Hehehehe! What if I were to say that to find your answer, you had to do as I told you?" She enjoyed pushing him more than anyone else. "Let's do it. Marry us, and I will grant you something."
Next to me, Rin shook in clear hatred even as her mind still recovered. But she must sleep, for even if her revenge was right there, it was not the time. She would regret that; I know that. She might hate me for this, but I kept her asleep on my shoulder.
We sat in the pews watching the wedding silently. Not that speech was something we could do here. It was hot, like a fever dream.
Irisviel Von Einzbern, my Mother, wore an incredible black dress that showed ample skin and had seven circle ringed through it. A long gown draped down to the ground. A weird that... that... had a black hole that sucked you just looking at. It swallowed light.
She was... pretty. I was happy for her, this was the moment she wanted all this time when she at the park. It was all so... familiar? Certain memories flickered of a fire, and a hole that bore into the world burning it all. A girl that tried to save me.
How... could I forget that? It can not be real. I suppress it.
Emiya Kiritsugu, my father, wore a suit of sorts. It wasn't anything different from the travel coat he loved to wear. It was a definite disparity from Mom's extravagance.
To say what Dad's face signalled in the moments would be to look into the eyes of a fish caught in a net. His fate was sealed long before then, ever since he was born perhaps. Irisviel would fix things the only way she knew how, by ripping out the guts of the tragedy and exposing the bloods and bones. Perhaps that truly would be enough.
The priest spoke with a melodic voice fitting for a man of the cloth. I did not recall his name. "Emiya Kiritsugu and Irisviel Von Einzbern, have you come here to enter into marriage without coercion, freely and wholeheartedly?"
"I do!" Mom exclaimed happily.
"I...do..." Dad whispered breathlessly. Every second of resistance was a second he melted a little more. He sighed. It was as if he thought this was insanity. But that's not right, I must be wrong.
"Are you prepared, as you follow the path of marriage, to love and honour each other for as long as you both shall live?"
"Absolutely!" Mom shouted gleefully.
"Yes..." Dad whimpered.
"Are you prepared to accept children lovingly from God and to bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?"
"I love our kids!" Mom beamed merrily.
"I will..." Dad held his fists together, holding calm ven under stress. He must be stressed by how happy he is.
"Then by the power vested within me as an agent of the lord, I bless this holy union under His eyes. You may now present the rings of matrimony."
"Not that I needed His permission. Haha, if He cared for this world at all, then I wouldn't be here, would I? And holy? That's not the word I'd use." Mom spoke freely and uncaring for that part.
"Kiritsugu, receive this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity, in the name of Angra Mainyu." In her hand held the ring of marriage. For it was simply the engagement ring that had been given before.
Sweat dripped from his face as if in fear of it.
She laughed at him, and smiled. "Hehe, yes, my dear. Think of this ring on your hand as all the lives you killed. I take that from you. It's my responsibility, not yours." She took the engagement ring from his finger and placed it on her own. "This is the ring of all the lives you have saved, with this act and the acts of the past." She places it into his finger. "Better right?" She smiled like a kid smiled.
"Wilt thou have this man to thy wedded husband, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou obey him, and serve him, love, honour, and keep him, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto him, so long as ye both shall live?"
"I Irisviel take thee Kiritsugu to my wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, cherish, and to obey, not even in death us do part, according to Angra Mainyu's unholy ordinance; and thereto I give thee my troth."
The priest continued with his holy book in hand. The book was dripping as black mud came out of it. "Wilt thou have this woman to thy wedded wife, to live together after God's ordinance in the holy estate of Matrimony? Wilt thou love her, comfort her, honour, and keep her, in sickness and in health; and, forsaking all other, keep thee only unto her, so long as ye both shall live?"
"..." No words came from the mouth of Kiritsugu.
Her fingers ran through his disheveled hair, "Come now, Kiritsugu. What is it that keeps you? Don't be shy. Say the words, and all your wishes will come true."
The path that saved the most lives was the path of love and reconciliation. Something simple to many, but to Emiya Kiritsugu it was a harder path than any other.
"I Kiritsugu... take Irisviel to be my wedded wife... Until my hands can no longer hold yours." A stone look from Kiritsugu gave off a measure of resolve that had been lost before. He had found what he needed to do, even as strange as it was. Uncomfortable and invasive, it was a greater challenge to take her hand fully than it was to kill it. ...And yet he did, and leaned into her.
"Then you may now kiss the bride." But that was unneeded as Mom had already leaped in Dad's hands. She sought comfort in them and wouldn't let go like a lost child who had been found.
A willing kiss made with proper consent. Not one made to divert attention or bury unsettling thoughts. Sadness remained, but it was small in the moment.
It was a kiss of love, made in a moment of acceptance. Consent to a miracle; consent to the future, come what may. This moment itself was a miracle worth it all.
Love is acceptance, violence, possessiveness, and sadness. And yet, it adds up to something far beyond those parts, something that reaches across the limitations of time and space.
My eyes did not see the colour of love, because I still did not get it entirely. My eyes can see much more than what my mind can make sense of. The more that I used these eyes, the more my mind will come to change too in reflection. Whatever that may become. Surely if I witness love enough, then my mind would know it too. But why do I even want to know? I'm acting stupid. I mustn't love no matter what.
I made a deal I must follow.
An empty church where nobody clapped. The scene fast forwarded. Many happy thing occurred. Dancing, drinking, eating, kissing and confessions. Eventually, it ended in seconds.
"I want to give special thanks to all my fans, and those who I never would have made it here without! Especially Ilya, Shirou and —, whom I couldn't have done this without! Now catch!" She spoke a name that hurt me, and promptly threw a bouquet of flowers into the air.
Sakura caught the flowers in her hands. It feel apart in her hands and flowed like blood from her on the ground. She could not hold it in her hands and lost it forever.
A fairy tail would end here, for a happily ever after is not supposed to shown. But this tale was not one from the start, and so this brief sojourn into madness came to an end. Still, all left affected.
With her first wish granted, Irisviel brought with her gifts for those in attendance. It was thanks for granting her a chance in this new life.
For Sakura, she granted the chance to live a life with freedom.
For Shirou, she granted the chance to have a true family once more.
For Kirei, she granted him the promise of a chance to find his answer. But also a curse of exile to not return the fated time.
For Taiga, she granted her the chance to live, if only as the family pet.
For Shinji, she granted him the chance to live with goodness.
For Rin, she granted her the chance to know the truth of her father's end, and the power ro take revenge on it.
And for the husband, she granted him the chance to save all the live in the world: for as long as they were toget,her she would not take a life he told her to spare.
It was all just a spectacle for the sake of nobody in the end. I could do nothing but watch it in awe. It was everything I had wished for, but it was also the end of the beginning. For once I had started to know these feelings, I would not be able to stop until I've burned through it all until nothing remains. Yet I couldn't stop, for I had nothing to hold myself from it.
There was no distinction here between the seventh circle of heaven or hell.
For how strange, terrible and unnatural it was, there was still beauty in it. It is only within the most awful of occasions that the true value of life can be found. And certainly, by the time the wedding ended, all who witnessed it would remember the day for the rest of their lives.
Author's notes:
I figured that it wasn't fair that Rin was the only one who hadn't faced a mind-breaking trial yet. She's strong though, so she will find her way past this. Even if it is at the expense of others. Her anger levels will be not good for a while.
This was a very intense chapter, those many things happened that will require elaboration over time. Such as the actual terms of the contract between Emiya and Tohsaka and lots of slower things.
And there is Gilgamesh, who is satisfied to watch right now. He should stay away, for I think he can feel that it would not be good to be around. He is still exploring humanity for now. I don't have much for him for now, and like Kirei he should be expected not be too prevalent until later.
With Kirei I will do something good with him. In canon he was not always in Fuyuki anyway, so it's not crazy to kick him out now and have him roam a little. He has a meet up with a certain lass down the line. Iri won't let them breathe.
Also I times this just right so I released near October 20th, so this is 24 years ago.
The next chapter should be Katarina and then Ilya. I'm going to time skip after this about 4 months until early February 1998. Illya deserves her time now, because Rin and Sakura received a lot already.
Sometimes I write material that won't be released for a long time just because I have a good idea and don't want to forget. So really, some of my best stuff is in chapters that won't be released for maybe years.
My servant list is almost finalized. Maybe I would withare it to one person if you asked to debate and such. It's a spoiler ofc tho.
Remember to review, favorite, follow. I'm doing midterms right now, and comments are greatly appreciated!