December 1945

The first thing she remembered was the fear that paralyzed her mind.

Then came the cold, so shocking and unexpected that she instinctively gasped. Her lungs burned as her chest filled with water.

She tried to struggle upwards, but her thick coat dragged her down. She was soundlessly screaming, drowning, dying.

Her already blurred vision darkened around the edges as she realised this was the end.

She vaguely remembered something grabbing hold of her, but she didn't have the energy to care.

Everything went blank for a moment, then the intense pressure on her vanished and she could suddenly hear again.

The burning in her chest intensified until it was a scorching fire. Desperation clawed at her mind as she tried to expel it, but she couldn't get the air in.

She was numb, confused, and more scared than she could ever remember being in her life.

The last thing she remembered properly was being hoisted into someone's strong arms, and then there was nothing.

The first thing Minerva noted was that she didn't feel cold anymore. Instead she felt wonderfully warm, lying on something soft with what felt like a thick blanket piled on top of her. Her chest still felt heavy and her head hurt, assuring her that she was actually still alive and not in the Heaven that her father often spoke of. There was silence around her, though it was a comfortable quiet, disturbed only by the sound of someone turning a page in a book every so often.

She opened her eyes, and attempted to lift her head, though sank back into her pillow with a quiet groan when her chest tightened painfully. She was in the Hospital Wing, she could now see, tucked into one of the beds nearest to Madame Quinine's office. In an attempt to relieve the pain in her chest she sucked in a deep breath, slowly filling her aching lungs with oxygen. The feel of someone's hand touching hers startled her; her breath hitched in her throat and she started to cough painfully, her chest heaving with the effort.

"Here," said a familiar voice, and suddenly there was Irma propping her up and lifting a glass of water to her lips.

Minerva drank a few sips and her throat relaxed, allowing her to breathe easier. "Thanks," she whispered, shuffling backwards to lean against the head of the bed.

Irma sat down in a chair next to the bed, taking care not to knock off a thick book that was balanced precariously on the arm. Minerva realised that it had been that she'd heard- Irma had obviously been reading by her bed for a fair amount of time. "How long have you been here?" she asked, her voice a cracked rasp.

Glancing up at the Hospital Wing clock, Irma replied "About half an hour."

"Where's everyone else?" Minerva asked, looking around to check there was definitely no-one else with them. She was surprised that Poppy at the least hadn't been there, as her medical aptitude meant she usually wanted to be involved whenever someone was injured.

"In lessons," Irma said, tugging at the gold chain of her Time-Turner. "I'm guilty of abusing this again, I'm actually in Arithmancy and Ancient Runes right now. We all begged to be excused from lessons but Professor Dumbledore said you shouldn't be disturbed, and Madame Quinine agreed with him."

"Lessons?" Minerva echoed, squinting in a failed attempt to read what time it was from the clock on the far wall. It was only then she remembered she needed a new pair of glasses, making a mental note to owl her mother about it. "How long have I been here?"

Irma laughed. "Just over 24 hours. Today's Monday and it's the last lesson of the day, then term ends for Christmas." She paused, then added "I expect the others will be here as soon as lessons finished."

Minerva nodded vaguely, then properly processed what Irma had said. Their terrible argument suddenly came flooding back- her chest constricted again though it was nothing to do with her recovering lungs. "How is everyone?" she asked awkwardly, not really knowing how to word the question.

Thankfully, Irma seemed to know what she meant. "Ro's made herself scarce. She didn't sleep in your dormitory last night, at every meal she's eaten as quickly as possible before leaving, and in lessons she's sat as far away from us as possible. Poppy's more upset than anything else. Millicent thinks everyone needs to talk it though, but Septima's still fuming and won't listen."

"And you?" Minerva said as softly as her harsh voice could manage, taking hold of Irma's hand. Even in her weary state, she could sense the internal conflict rolling from Irma in waves.

Irma swallowed hard and averted her gaze. "I wonder whether she's really wrong or not. I must be at least a little like the other Blacks, or I wouldn't be in Slytherin. The Sorting Hat thought so, anyway."

Minerva frowned, not liking what she was hearing. "How long did your Sorting take?"

"4 minutes and 50 seconds, so I'm told."

"Then you're obviously not just like them, or there wouldn't have been any debate." Minerva said, moving her head with difficulty so Irma was forced to meet her eyes. "We all know how rash and... insensitive Ro can be; yesterday she was angry and took it out on us. She didn't think about what she was saying, just said whatever came into her mind first. We're all your friends, Irma, and until you start believing we like you for who you are then we'll keep reminding you."

Nodding slightly and just about managing to smile, Irma briefly squeezed Minerva's hand in thanks. Minerva suddenly felt exhausted and her breathing became more difficult; her little speech to Irma had wiped out what little energy she had left.

Irma's expression changed from gratitude to concern instantly. "Do you need some more sleep? You're not looking too good all of a sudden."

Minerva nodded wordlessly, accepting Irma's help to shuffle forwards so she could lie down again. It was a struggle to keep her eyes open, and the soft warmth of the bed beneath her only made the struggle worse.

"I'll stay here until you're asleep," Irma said, smiling down at Minerva before settling back in her chair. Minerva barely managed a sound of acknowledgement before fatigue crashed down over her.

It could have been minutes or hours before Minerva became vaguely aware that someone was sitting on the end of her bed. When she realised she could hear someone crying, she kept her eyes closed but listened intently. It felt like the worst form of eavesdropping, but she had her suspicions about who was with her and she knew she'd find out more by pretending to be asleep.

"I'm so sorry," the voice sniffed, "I know you miss her too and you'd have done anything to help. I was stupid and selfish, and you might have died but I didn't do anything. I just ran away and didn't do anything!"

Minerva cracked open an eye just as Ro broke into sobs. Her heart clenched with an intense mixture of sorrow and relief; she hadn't lost Ro forever, there was still a chance to make things right between them.

"This is all my fault," Ro choked out between breaths, her head in her hands. "Why do I have to lose everyone who loves me? Oh Merlin what have I done, what have I done?"

Unable to listen any longer, Minerva shifted her foot slightly to poke Ro's leg. With a gasp her head wrenched up, looking around wildly until her eyes found Minerva looking at her. She started to back away, and it was only when Minerva called out her name that she stopped.

"I shouldn't be here," Ro stammered, still looking like she could bolt at any given second. Minerva wouldn't have minded that if it weren't for the fact she was in no state to go chasing after her.

"Yes, you should." Minerva said, breathing heavily as she sat up. An onlooker might have thought her bluntness inappropriate, but Minerva knew that Ro wouldn't appreciate being pandered to. "Won't you sit down?"

Ro perched awkwardly on the edge of the bed, close enough that her face was in focus without Minerva's glasses being necessary. It was only then that Minerva was able to get a good look at her. Ro's eyes were bloodshot and brimming with tears, making the yellow irises even more striking than usual. There were red blotches on her cheeks and dark circles beneath her eyes, making it obvious that she'd managed very little sleep the previous night.

"Min, I-"

"Shh," Minerva ploughed over her, leaning forward with difficulty and pulling her into a hug. Ro stiffened for a moment, before throwing her arms around Minerva's neck and crying her heart out into the ugly white hospital gown. Minerva didn't say anything, just held onto the shuddering form of her friend until the sobs subsided into a gentle trembling.

After a long while she drew back, rubbing her eyes with her shirt sleeve. "How can you forgive me?" she asked brokenly in a very un-Ro-like style.

"There's nothing to forgive," Minerva insisted quietly. She believed it too; Ro had every right to be angry, and in her ignorance she had genuinely believed for a moment that her mother could have been saved. "We were both in the wrong. Just promise me one thing?"

"Hmm?"

"Either get the glass-cracking under control, or learn a spell to make my glasses shatterproof!"

Ro returned Minerva's grin with a shaky smile of her own, leaning forward to give Minerva a much gentler embrace.

Ro stayed with Minerva until she was dismissed from the Hospital Wing an hour later. Poppy joined them as Madame Quinine gave Minerva a final check-over, greeting a hesitant Ro with a warm embrace. She'd brought a bundle of Minerva's clothes from the dormitory which she changed into, as well as a small package from Minerva's mother.

"Professor Dippet owled them almost as soon as we got you back," she said as Minerva quickly read the attached letter. "I mentioned about your glasses, so that's probably a new pair for you."

Poppy was right; beneath several sheets of brown paper was a new pair of glasses. They weren't quite the same as her old square ones though, as the frame turned up slightly where it was attached to the arms. Minerva sighed with relief as she put them on and the world came into focus for the first time that day.

"They're called horn-rimmed, apparently they're in fashion in the Muggle world." Minerva said, looking into the mirror that Madame Quinine had fetched. "Robbie thought they'd suit me."

"Well he was right," Poppy laughed. "Come on, if we go now we'll be just in time for dinner."

When Minerva, Poppy and Ro arrived together at the Gryffindor table, there was great deal of commotion as the rest of the House welcomed her back. Malcolm almost fell over the bench in his haste to reach his sister, making Minerva laugh at his enthusiasm. More surprising was when Larry followed him, letting out a relieved breath when he saw her and holding her close when they hugged. Minerva was touched, but the moment was destroyed when they broke apart and caught sight of Malcolm and Winston's identical disgusted expressions.

"What?" Minerva asked, struggling to contain her laughter.

Malcolm scowled. "Stop being mushy," he muttered.

Winston nodded in agreement. "We saw him carrying you up the Grand Staircase. It was like you were in a fairytale."

Minerva glanced at Larry, who looked away with a sheepish smile. She could just about remember someone holding her in their arms, but the memory was vague. "That was you?"

"You remember that?" he asked, his cheeks reddening when she nodded. "Well, someone had to," he murmured.

"Minerva's back!" shouted Millicent's voice, and Minerva looked around to see her and Septima racing towards them. Larry moved back as they went to hug her, but they never got that far before Septima froze in place.

"Hey," said Ro in a strangled voice.

Millicent's expression was torn as she looked between Septima and Ro. "Hi Ro," she said, her voice carefully neutral.

There was no reply as Septima and Ro continued their staring match. "Septima, I'm really sorry," Ro said after moment's silence, and Minerva only needed to hear the raw emotion in her voice to know she truly meant it.

"It's not me you should be apologising to." Septima said roughly, crossing her arms.

"She already has done, Septima." Irma had slipped though the small crowd to stand beside Ro, looking firmly at her sister. "What's done is done. Let's move on."

Septima held Irma's gaze for a moment, then dropped it with a sigh. "Then I'm ok," she said, giving Ro a nod. Ro's worried frown changed into a small smile.

As more people started to enter the Hall they took their usual seats at the Gryffindor Table, though Minerva noticed that Ro sat herself as far as she could from Minerva, Irma or Septima. It was going to take a little while for things to return to normal between them, but Minerva was glad that they were making progress.

The Hogwarts Express arrived the next morning, leaving the castle emptier than it had been since the Christmas of their second year. Irma, Septima and Millicent moved into Gryffindor Tower as usual, though it wasn't nearly as awkward as Minerva feared. Millicent was already acting as if nothing had happened and Septima proved to be readily forgiving; it was just Irma who was acting more detached than usual. It reminded Minerva of how she'd been during their first year before they were properly friends, meaning there was hope of her warming back up to them before too long.

Learning from the previous Christmas' mistake, they asked for Professor Dumbledore's help with moving the trunks from the Dungeons and Ravenclaw Tower into the Gryffindor dormitory. The job took less than five minutes, as opposed to the painful half an hour it had taken for Ro and Irma to manually move her trunk up from the Dungeons. But when all the girls were installed into the dormitory, Professor Dumbledore surprised Minerva by asking to talk to her in his office.

After Minerva assured him she was fully recovered from her dip in the lake, the Professor quickly moved onto the topic in hand. "Miss McGonagall, I've been thinking about the request you made over the weekend," he started, motioning for her to take a seat. "I fear I may have been a little hasty. I was merely surprised that a student so young would want to learn such a complicated and rare skill. I hope I haven't discouraged you?"

"No, sir, not at all," Minerva said, her heartbeat quickening.

"Since our discussion I've been in contact with a few people. The Headmistress of Uagadou School of Magic assured me that her students are given the option to learn from age 14, so she thinks it perfectly suitable if the proper precautions are taken. Madame Tuft of the Department for Magical Law Enforcement, where the Animagi Register is kept, agreed with her. You will, however, need permission from your parents before we begin."

Minerva nodded, a grin splitting her face. "I'll owl them right away," she just about managed to stammer over her excitement.

There was a twinkle in Professor Dumbledore's eye as he said "I already have." He pulled a roll of parchment from his desk draw and showed her the signatures of both her parents.

"When can I start?" Minerva said, tearing her gaze from the letter back to Professor Dumbledore.

"The first stage of the process is the longest, and though it is the simplest many call it the worst. To start of the process of the transformation, you are required to hold the leaf of a Mandrake in your mouth for a full month. It means you won't be able to talk for that time, and you'll have to be careful when eating. I have been advised that large quantities of soup are recommended."

He chuckled as Minerva pulled an involuntary face. "For that reason, I suggest you begin near the end of the Christmas holiday. You'll be able to enjoy Christmas to the full, and you'll be able to talk again in plenty of time for your next Quidditch match. Professor Dippet recommends people are informed you have a throat illness during the month you cannot talk, to avoid other people requesting to learn also. You must understand this is a very difficult skill to learn, and it would be out of the question if I didn't think you talented enough."

Minerva nodded seriously. "But can I tell my friends?"

"Yes, you will need their support during this preparation. It may also be wise to inform your Quidditch Team, though I can do this if you wish." His serious expression cleared as he continued "I think I have covered everything you need to know today, Miss McGonagall. Enjoy your holiday, and I will be in touch with you when I think we are ready to begin."

"Thank you, sir." Minerva nodded, sensing her dismissal and seeing herself out of the office.

When she returned to Gryffindor Tower, the others were overjoyed for her. Poppy was still concerned, but relaxed considerably when Minerva told her about the Uagadou students. It was clear that there had been a proper conversation between the remaining five while Minerva had been away, as the tension between them had nearly melted away.

"So," Millicent started, amusingly oblivious to the fact that Godric was chewing one of her pigtails from her shoulder. "We've already had our drama this holiday-"

"-you could say that again." Irma interrupted quietly, a wry smile on her face that brought immense relief to Minerva.

Millicent continued after a snort of laughter. "Well, yes. But going by previous Christmases, that should mean we're in for a nicely uneventful Christmas."

"You know what?" said Ro with a thoughtful frown. "Normally I'd think that sounds boring. But after this year we could all do with some peace and quiet for once."

Poppy nodded. "This Christmas is going to be the best one yet!

And for many reasons, it was. They went to bed early that night because Ro looked in danger of falling asleep standing up and Poppy said Minerva still needed rest. There was less than a week remaining before Christmas, which was spent almost entirely indoors due to the persistent snowy weather.

To pass the time they became experts of the various different wizarding games. There were countless Exploding Snap tournaments which left the dormitory smelling like lightly charred wood, Poppy winning nearly every single one of them. One evening they joined Lyall Lupin and Stanley Sanders in the Common Room for a game of gobstones, which was fun at first but quickly became dull. The highlight of the game was Ro got a faceful of awful-smelling gunk, which happened relatively frequently as her aim was so awful.

After gobstones truly lost its appeal, their attention switched to Wizarding Chess. As three of the six of them had their own sets, it was easy for everyone to play at once. Poppy and Millicent were both a little shocked by the brutality of the game, but could pick it up fairly easily. Ro's board was the easiest to play with as it had been passed down between her siblings so was quite trusting of new players, but Septima's much more suspicious pieces quickly developed a particular dislike for Poppy's hesitance. Minerva enjoyed it the most of all the games they'd played though she wasn't very good at it, but Irma very quickly proved herself the reigning chess champion.

Christmas Day itself was a joy from start to finish. The chandelier incident of last Christmas was brought up frequently throughout the day, and the angry glares shot their way from the Black family while in the Great Hall made it clear they hadn't forgotten either. It was hours before they returned to the Gryffindor Common Room after their Christmas dinner, full to the brim and each wearing a very extravagant hat.

It was three days after Christmas when a note arrived for Minerva during breakfast, addressed in Professor Dumbledore's unmistakeable handwriting. When Minerva went to his office that evening as requested, he presented her with a small Mandrake leaf and the date of their next meeting. She returned to the dormitory, and sat on the floor between the beds with all her friends beside her.

"So no talking for a month?" Septima asked, eyeing the leaf.

Minerva shook her head. "But Professor Dumbledore said there's a spell he'll teach me so I can communicate."

"Right." Poppy said, her commanding tone catching everyone's attention. She was stood by the calendar pinned to the back of the dormitory door, quill in hand. "Today is Friday the 28th of December 1945. Your month finishes on," she turned the page over and stabbed a date with her quill, "Monday the 28th of January 1946."

"Good luck Min," Ro said with a smile.

Minerva sighed, taking the leaf into her hand. Feeling she should say something before she no longer had that option, she cleared her throat awkwardly. "Well then, I'll talk to you all next month!"

After a brief moment of laughter shared by them all, Minerva took a deep breath and put the leaf into her mouth.

Author's Note:

This was a fun chapter to write, particularly the beginning. I've probably taken a few liberties with the drowning description since I've never been in a similar situation, but I am a lifeguard in training so have an idea how drowning goes. Both the Hospital Wing scenes were good; I love the relationship between Irma and Minerva that has been slowly evolving for so long. Minerva's the one who understands her the most out of all of them, though Poppy comes a close second, which is probably why Irma's opened up to those two more than the rest of the girls. Even though the twins have a good relationship with each other, Irma wouldn't go to Septima with her worries like she might go to Minerva. It was odd but surprisingly easy to write Ro's emotional scene. Her feelings are so out there and boldy expressed that it comes very naturally- in that aspect she's the polar opposite of Irma.

I spent a lot of time thinking about how the girls would react to the previous chapter's argument. Poppy and Minerva both understand better than anyone how Ro will react without thinking when confronted with strong emotions, so they were both able to move on fairly easily. Millicent wasn't directly involved in the argument at all, so she too just wanted everyone to make amends. I think this also came from her not wanting her friendship group to be broken up like her family had recently been. For all her initial anger Septima doesn't like to hold grudges, once she was assured that Ro had apologised to her sister then she was ok with it. Irma is the opposite- she doesn't get loudly angry and won't generally argue back, but she harbours the comments people make about her and overthinks them a lot. Both the twins' reactions also stem from their home lives and in particular their father's abuse; Irma accepts what people have to say about her and will assume it's the truth, while Septima will argue until an apology has been made then will immediately forget.

Someone said in a review of the last chapter that they were getting attached to Larry, and I became very happy reading that. He is an absolute darling and I love him way more than I expected to when he first appeared. His importance in the story will only increase as it goes on, and I can't wait to see what you all think of it.

Were any of you surprised with Dumbledore's change of heart? I just thought that if the marauders could do it alone by fifth year then Minerva could do it with a teacher in fourth year. The thing about eating and talking while holding the Mandrake leaf in the mouth is made up by me, as it's never specified in canon but it seemed like common sense to me!

I've rambled here too long. There will probably not be another chapter until early-mid august, as I'm away for two weeks. But I've finally decided on my plan for the rest of fourth year (I had some last minute brainwaves!) and I can promise it's all good fun :)